You Don' Know What You've
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from previous page Gus Smarrini's Team You don't know... continued from page I Talk is ideal for footy par You don' know what you've got ties and after match banter Of course, none of these foreign codes will create significant problems 1 - try naming the mem bers for footy in the short term but in the longer term - increased media til you lose it! EddieGreenaway of the One-Gamers team .. exposure and the onset of the global community - may mean that o try Hilton Kotsur (Swans) at child growing up in the Victoria of the next century will not hove the As Footyzine#4 goes to press the entire state of the game seems to be The defence of Football's Hadrions Woll is resting on the hopes of the full back and Rin a Pretto single dream of aspiring to be o Leag ue footballer (boys of course) or (Fitzroy & Oaklei gh) at full forward for starters or the Lucky 13's .. in flu x. Sh1nboners from North for bock to bock flogsand on the historically very following aleague team for life (girlsand boys). One day Melburnions yeah I kn owMi chael Lon g, but who remembers the numbers worn In the "expansion" centres of Sydney and Brisbone, crowd support for iffy shouldersof Geelong, St.Kildo and the lost fading Scraggers from the may have to put up with all these other iritating codes like those of us by big Ray Gabelich and Dick Leei My lave teams woul d have to be the Swans and the Lions, media exposure, the number of kids kicking Western suburbs. who live in the ouftands have to. the Geelong Reds for hum our and fo r poignancy, South 's Last footies around and the general interest of the overage punter in the Unfortunately for traditional club supportersin Victoria, the mop of boffie Swansong What's the answer? street is all booming. hos been redrawn - permanenrly. It is now otruly notional competition, Agreat littleready rec koner, you never know when thi s sort of In short, the future of the game lies in the hands of Victorians them The success of the Crows and the Power hos turned already fontotical in terms of structure and in termsof club strength, and public support. trivia wil l come in handy. selves from the average supporter right through to the Coaches and South Australia into osmelting furnonce of football euphoria. The only potential problem for the long term health of the game isthat Boardrooms of the traditionally powe~ul clubs. In the West, it's steady as she goes with The Eagles holding on to finals V1Ctono 1s still by ohuge margin thebreeding ground for league footbol~ ers ... ond the heartland of commercial and public support for the game. In some ways they may have to toke o leaf from the missionary zeal contention despite o huge injury toll and the Dockers threatening to HEATHENS make the grade ofter 3 seasons. So, the question arises, is AFL throwing out the baby with the both A documentary by Megan Spencer evident in the northern states where the Swans players for example The biggest area of concern seems to be in Mecca itself. Like Rome in water. Isit sacrificing the fertile delta of the game for the risky process of Review by Rachel Kerr conduct guerilla missions deep into Rugby League territory seeking young intensive irrigation in the for flung provinces? converts and importanfty the suppo rt of the mums. In NSW and Queens· decline, Melbourne sees itself as surrounded by fearsome tribes of Huns, Around three hundred million people in this world Football could not withstand o sustained Victorian backlash and conse land thousands of people wo rk for a pittance or for nothing at all, in Vandals and Visigoths descending from the North, the South and the speak English .. and it seems most of the rest West. quent decline. With. Chancellor Kennetts Bread and Circuses empire building attempt to -that is except if you're a footyfan - organisations like the QAFL and the NSWAFL, in public radio shows like at ofrenzy· V1ctono may soon see the intrusion of Rugby Union, Rugby Helen Meyer's on 2NBC FM and like the humble folk at Footyzine. All The brave standard bearers of the old VFL- Carlton, Essendon, Rich Genus: Sainter. mond, Collingwood, Hawthorn and Melbourne oreall spe nt forces, with League and ode-ethnicised Soccer into it's own patch. this for the love of the game. Type: Heathen. almost no chance that any will be around on that one day in September. continued on page 32 Why speak English when grunting expresses so So it irks when Victorian's throw glib accusations of trendy bond much more? And when a grunt doesn't, there's al wogoneering at fans in NSW and Queensland because we know what ways cunt. Wall-to wall grunts and cunts. The um it's like to go without. Trying to find an oval with four posts on it is nearly Kick on again at pires a big cunt. Tony Shaw is a short cunt. Daniher as hard as it used to be to find the Swans results in the paper and as Camperdown .is an ugly cunt. In a losing breeze everyone's a cunt hard as it still is to get on overall feeling of where the competition as o Yep! It's on again! Come on -except of course, Lockett who's the only cunt doin whole is at or alive brodocast of aSwans away game on "footy's home Trounce Harry's Retirement 'loon F/Cover down to Camperdown Ova l anythin. Chook, Barry, Justin and the rest of the ground". (Ma llett St, Camperdown) Mary Lou Thorp They Call Me Schnitzel 2 Heathens are a bunch of ordinary ugly suburban So when bitter and twisted Richmond fans (well known for their band for a kick 'n a yarn .... cunts - elevated only by their fanaticism for the wagon jumping) or unsuccessful Collingwood coaches winge about un Di Buckley Confessions of a Footychick 5 footyzine on sa le... footy ... snagger sizz le ... footy .... Saints and their ability to make 'fucken cunt' sound fair advantages for interstate sides - I'd like to see how Collingwood Humphrey B. Flaubert TISM Talking Football 6 like creative criticism. I love their plug-ugliness, Neill Jones The View From Bay 4 8 sweat ... footy ... $2 fans would cope with only three games of live football in ha~ aseason. Game 1pm , player rego from their singleness of emotion and the fixed stare of It's up to Victorian Ions to stop their mooning and support their clubs- Craig Nelson How to Play Footy l O fan hatred - it's primitive, honest and raw. 12.30pm - be early! pay the bloody membership, go the games and cheer · even if your Anton Hassel Illustrations 11 Saturday August 30 Five stars for the 5 cunts featured - now I under team only make the finalso couple of timesevery decade. stand what the F.C. bit really stands for .. Terry O'Brien Remembering When 12 Tel: 9557 7929 fo r details Fickle fans and jealous backbiting may make some se~iig hteous Me~ Irwin Hirsh The Heart of the Matter 18 bourne fans feel smugly self-satisfied but it won't keep the Victorian FOOTYZINE #4 • Winter 1997 AFan What Napoleon Said 21 APOLOGY! pp24 l 2 l 8/0047 ISSN 1327-7030 clubs olive and of deeper concern to Ions all over Australia it just hurts Kellie O'Dempsey Illustration 21 OOPS! In last Issue, the story Club: Our Zine City, PO Box 199, Newtown 2042 the game. Team: Eddie Greenaway, Di Buckley, Angelo Co ll ins Craig John Wilson Instilling The Rules 22 about the Preston Knights, on So to all you Blues, Bombers, Magpies and Tigersfans - Get off your Cheers: U-Bute T Shirts, Anne Kyle , Megan Spencer, Ian Latham Canterbury Tales 25 I page 18 was wrongly credited. Anne Cooper, Craig Davis, the NSWAFL, our contributors, backsides and keep your team olive · just ask a Blood Brother or o The true author of this article is subscribers and advertisers, Daryn Cresswell and all Bloods. Sainter or Scroy Sister how they've kept the flame alive through dee· Stephen Marmo Anyone for Porridge? 26 I Michael Nichols of Heathcote, Cheer, Cheer the Red and th e White! odes of defeat · otherwise you' ll end up with one game of live footy Readers Mailbag 28 I Victoria. Stull-up #2 - the photos Website: www.documento.corn .au/ footyzine of Camberwell should have run Email: gome@onoustrolio .com.ou every other week and the odd footy show on TV at some obscure hour GBlessington-Hedge Esq. Letter to Wayne Jackson 2u with the actual article by S D Footyzine is created by footy fans - for footy fans. All published of th e morning ... Not to mention the regular humiliation of the Eddie Greenaway Printin' & Publishin' 31 Murphy! Our apologies, we still material reflects the views of its contflbutors and are not Squatocracy carrying out their blasphemous and deadly boring Thugby '--R_os_s _Ca_rn_se_w~~~~G_re~g_W~ill_ia~m~s ~'to~on:.:._~~~B~/~Co:'..'...'.'ver don't know how this happened! necessarily those of the publisher. Rituals on the hollowed tu~ of the G. 32 @ FOOTY ZINE @ loyalty is fast becoming athing of the past, afact alluded to by Gavin Brown himself. "At the end of th e (1993) season ... we foun d out abo ut the 'Sacred Ten, a !isl of ten players Collingwootl were not prepared to trade in order to get Nathan Buekley er Brett Chalmers.