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Big Finish If the Mayans Had Known What Hollywood Has Planned for This Month, They Might’Ve Pushed Back Their Doomsday Timetable

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Big Finish If the Mayans Had Known What Hollywood Has Planned for This Month, They Might’Ve Pushed Back Their Doomsday Timetable culture || THE MONTH AHEAD Big Finish If the Mayans had known what Hollywood has planned for this month, they might’ve pushed back their doomsday timetable AN IRISH TOMECOMING To celebrate a native son, Dublin goes by the book In cities around the world this month, throngs will turn out to celebrate Bloomsday, June 16, honoring James Joyce’s landmark novel Ulysses—which may baffl e anyone who’s made a failed stab at reading the famously impenetrable day-in-the-life epic. World War Z This Is the End After Earth But it all makes perfect sense (JUNE 21) (JUNE 12) (NOW PLAYING) to the overseer of the biggest Bloomsday fete, a seven-day party SCENARIO in Joyce’s hometown of Dublin. “Ulysses is a very democratic book As if Armageddon wasn’t’t’t A thousand years after A very ugly horde of in that it brings people together,” brain-dead baddies weird enough, here we have humans fl ed an inhospitable threatens to devour the Seth Rogen and Jonah Hill Earth, a general and his son says Mark Traynor, manager of planet. One very good- playing themselves and (played by Will Smith and Dublin’s James Joyce Centre. “You looking man (Brad Pitt) preparing to meet their his son, Jaden) crash there, can’t read it in isolation—it almost is among the humans maker at a James Franco fi nd that it’s still inhospi- requires a support group.” standing in their way. house party. table and have a heckuva In addition to retracing the time re-fl eeing. steps of Ulysses’ hero, Leopold THREAT Bloom, through the city streets, Dublin Bloomsday attendees can Dead men Aliens, dude. “Everything on this partake of Joyce-centric readings, swarming. planet has evolved seminars and performances galore to kill humans.” (including an experimental theater piece, (S)quark!, that employs an ODDS OF SURVIVAL actual parrot in discussing the If Pitt can save his The gang has We’re confi dent that question: Was Joyce a genius?). career after that stockpiled more beer Smith and Son will pull For fi rst-timers, Traynor awful Chanel cam- than water, but don’t through (though with recommends the Bloomsday paign, he certainly underestimate the M. Night Shyamalan at breakfast—though queasy eaters can manage this. power of toilet humor. the helm, maybe it was may balk at Bloom’s beloved grilled all just a dream). kidneys. “It’s a wonderfully social atmosphere,” Traynor says of the meal, “even if the menu isn’t to everybody’s taste.” JUNE 10–16 “JETTIE HAD BEEN CAUGHT DRINKING, FOR THE SECOND TIME, BY MRS. HOLMES; THE REAL STORY THERE WAS THAT SHE HAD BEEN DRINKING ALONE. LIKE A MAN. SHE WAS NOT ALLOWED TO RIDE FOR A WEEK, WHICH SEEMED AN EVEN WORSE PUNISHMENT THAN EMBROIDERING HANDKERCHIEFS.” —From The Yonahlossee Riding Camp for Girls, the Depression-era tale by fi rst-time novelist Anton DiSclafani that sparked a reported seven-fi gure bidding war. june 4 44 JUNE 2013 • HEMISPHERESMAGAZINE.COM R2_p041-046_HEM0613_Culture.indd 44 09/05/2013 09:27.
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