The Secret Everyone Should Know About Contents

The secret everyone should know about Contents

A special thank you to Sharing our secret ��4 Jan and Ray, members of Sharing Wattle Place with other the Wattle Place Consultative Forgotten Australians ��4 Forum. This booklet would not Why everyone needs to know exist if it weren’t for them. about Wattle Place ��4 Our hopes for this booklet ��4

So, let’s tell you about Wattle Place! ��6 Wattle Place provides the following services ��6 Support Specific to our needs ��7

What makes Wattle Place special? ��8

Federal Apology to Forgotten Australians ��10

Why do many Forgotten Australians need a service like Wattle Place? �� 12 History of Wattle Place Our reality �� 12 Wattle Place was established following Wattle Place, Relationships The trauma stays with us �� 12 the Apology to Forgotten Australians Australia NSW, acknowledges and Former Child Migrants, by then the traditional custodians of Prime Minister, the Hon Kevin Rudd MP, the land and waters on which What are some challenges we face day to day? �� 14 on 16 November 2009. A transcript of we live and work, and pays that Apology is included on pages 10 our respects to Elders past, How can the wider community and 11 of this booklet. present and future. help Forgotten Australians? �� 16 Linda Burney MP, the former New How to contact Wattle Place �� 18 South Wales Minister for Community Services, opened Wattle Place in Additional Information and support services �� 18 March 2011. She acknowledged the suffering experienced by the Forgotten Crisis numbers �� 18 Australians and the role Wattle Place could play in the process of healing Further Reading �� 19 by sensitively considering their fears, needs and concerns.

2 3 Sharing our Secret

We are Forgotten Australians Sharing Wattle Place with will learn about a part of Australia’s Our hopes for this booklet and we’d like to tell you other Forgotten Australians history that has been largely kept We have three goals in making a secret. We want everyone to about Wattle Place. Wattle Place is a safe haven for this booklet. First of all, to inform us, but there are many Forgotten know that history, because ending • healthcare staff “Forgotten Australians” is the Australians who don’t know about the secrecy ends the shame. official term given to those who, it. We want to get the word out As the name suggests, “Forgotten • aged care staff as children, were separated from about Wattle Place, so that more Australians” have felt forgotten • service providers their parents and placed in foster Forgotten Australians can benefit throughout our lives. We were homes, orphanages, children’s from it. Wattle Place provides a hidden away and forgotten when • workers in government homes and other institutions, community of people who share we were children, our experiences departments before 1990. Some of us prefer the experience of being placed were ignored and forgotten once • the general community other terms including “care leavers” in institutions or foster homes as we left the institutions or foster or “former state wards”. The term children. We know how isolating homes, and we were expected to about what we experienced each of us use and identify with and challenging life can be when just forget our experiences and get during our time in institutions is a personal choice, and none of you feel like no one understands on with our lives afterwards. Even and foster homes and how these will be suitable for everyone. what you’ve been through, or what now, after inquiries and apologies, that negatively impacts our interactions with you now. Some members of the Stolen you’re going through now. Wattle that part of Australia’s history, Generations and Former Child Place staff do understand, they along with our experiences, seem to Secondly, to help share the Migrants were also placed in listen and they know how to help. have been largely forgotten by the collective secrets we hold, and institutions or foster homes, and wider community. Unfortunately, we generate more understanding, therefore share similar childhood Why everyone needs to can never forget our experiences more discussion, and highlight the experiences, and similar impacts in know about Wattle Place because receiving that kind of positive difference other people adulthood, to Forgotten Australians. We also want the wider community treatment as a child leaves physical can easily make to our lives. to know about Wattle Place. Many of and psychological scars that Thirdly, to invite Forgotten us hold the stories of our own past continue to impact us every day. as secrets. We find our individual Australians who don’t know about We want the wider community stories very difficult to discuss, Wattle Place, to get in touch and to know and understand what but Wattle Place can safely share see if Wattle Place can assist you. happened to us because we don’t what we, as a group, experienced. want to be “Forgotten” anymore. When people know about Wattle Place and the work they do, they

4 5 So, let’s tell you about Wattle Place!

Those of us who were in NSW Wattle Place provides a warm, Wattle Place is part of Wattle Place provides the institutions and foster homes are friendly and relaxed environment Relationships Australia following services: also eligible for a contribution to get together with others NSW and provides services • Face to face and towards the costs of some services who understand what we’ve specifically to support: telephone counselling that support our wellbeing, such experienced, participate in • Forgotten Australians – that as medical, dental, optical, etc. enriching activities, or just hang out • Assistance with information is, people who experienced and chat with our “pet” cat, Wattle. and referrals to other services In addition, Wattle Place provides institutional or foster care separate support services for They offer culturally sensitive as children, before 1990 • Access to Institutional people considering applying for support and the opportunity to and personal records • Members of the Stolen Redress under the National Redress speak with Aboriginal counsellors, Generations and Former Child • Family tracing Scheme, and people who were if you’d prefer. Wattle Place also Migrants who were also placed • Therapeutic Casework impacted by past forced adoptions. offers a number of the services in institutions or foster homes over the phone, online and through All these services are free and • Social activities and coordination with other services. • Anyone 26 years or older who commemorative events do not require a referral. was placed in out-of-home You may have never identified care in NSW after 1990 • The Drop-in centre Support specific to our needs as a Forgotten Australian, or • Group workshops Wattle Place has around 20 staff known of the existence of the who specialise in supporting people term, but if you were placed in • A quarterly newsletter with childhood experiences of institutions or foster homes when institutional and foster care. They you were a child, you are eligible understand the ongoing impacts for support from Wattle Place. that those experiences can continue If you feel that you need some to have throughout life, and provide support, we encourage you to non-judgmental, compassionate contact Wattle Place to see if and empathetic support. The staff it is the right service for you. are strong advocates for us and are here to help us navigate life.

6 7 What makes Wattle Place special?

A place to belong Wattle Place provides an They know the importance of trust gain new skills, experience The sense of belonging that Wattle opportunity to be around others Wattle Place staff are dedicated new things and develop Place creates is invaluable to us, who have a shared experience. to helping us and work to earn our connections and friendships. but Wattle Place does so much trust slowly through compassion, more. Wattle Place provides social We have choices honesty and reliability. They recognise our strengths connections and the opportunity We are given choice over our Although we share a common to be a part of a community where involvement at Wattle Place. They support our search for answers bond, each of our experiences we feel we are among friends and This is important to us, as the Finding records of our identity, our were different, and each of our we belong. Knowing that we have powerlessness we felt in our family or our time in out-of-home responses and coping mechanisms somewhere to go for support when childhood was very traumatic. care can be incredibly significant are different. Despite what we went we need it, provides a sense of for us, but can have both positive through in our childhood, many security and increased confidence We are respected and negative effects. Wattle Place of us have survived. Even though, in facing some of our challenges. Wattle Place staff understand not only help us find our records, for many of us, that survival has what we struggle with and but also provide support, when we its challenges, we continue to We are believed show us respect and kindness. need it, to deal with what we find. battle through. Wattle Place staff The staff at Wattle Place This is not always the case out recognise and acknowledge that. are aware of the history and in the wider community We have fun and form friendships continuing impacts on Forgotten The group work and the social Australians. It is liberating to be activities offered by Wattle able to confide in someone (if we Place provide fun and varied choose to) and to be believed. ways to explore our creativity,

8 9 Motion of apology to the Forgotten Australians and Former Child Migrants

We come together today to deal with an ugly chapter in our nation’s history. And we come together today to offer our as child migrants - robbed of your And we reflect with you as well, in nation’s apology. To say to you, the Forgotten Australians, and families, robbed of your homeland, sad remembrance, on those who those who were sent to our shores as children without your regarded not as innocent children but simply could not cope and who regarded instead as a source of child took their own lives in absolute consent, that we are sorry. labour. To those of you who were despair. We recognise the pain you told you were orphans, brought here have suffered. Pain is so very, very Sorry - that as children you that many of these little ones who without your parents’ knowledge or personal. Pain is so profoundly were taken from your families were entrusted to institutions and consent, we acknowledge the lies disabling. So, let us together, and placed in institutions where foster homes instead, were abused you were told, the lies told to your as a nation, allow this apology so often you were abused. physically, humiliated cruelly, violated mothers and fathers, and the pain to begin to heal this pain. sexually. And we look back with these lies have caused for a lifetime. Sorry - for the physical suffering, Healing the pain felt by so many shame at how those with power To those of you separated on the the emotional starvation and the of the half a million of our fellow were allowed to abuse those who dockside from your brothers and cold absence of love, of tenderness, Australians who were children in had none. And how then, as if this sisters; taken alone and unprotected of care. care - children in our care. And let us was not injury enough, you were left to the most remote parts of a foreign also resolve this day that this national Sorry - for the tragedy, the ill-prepared for life outside - left to land - we acknowledge today that apology becomes a turning point in absolute tragedy, of childhoods fend for yourselves; often unable the laws of our nation failed you. our nation’s story. A turning point for lost,- childhoods spent instead in to read or write; to struggle alone And for this we are deeply sorry. shattered lives. A turning point for austere and authoritarian places, with no friends and no family. governments at all levels and of every where names were replaced by We think also today of all the families For these failures to offer proper care political hue and colour to do all in numbers, spontaneous play by of these Forgotten Australians and to the powerless, the voiceless and our power to never let this happen regimented routine, the joy of former child migrants who are still the most vulnerable, we say sorry. again. For the protection of children learning by the repetitive drudgery grieving, families who were never We reflect too today on the is the sacred duty of us all. of menial work. reunited, families who were never families who were ripped apart reconciled, families who were lost to This is the motion that later this day Sorry - for all these injustices to simply because they had fallen on one another forever. We reflect too this Government will commend to the you, as children, who were placed hard times. Hard times brought about on the burden that is still carried by Parliament of Australia. in our care. by illness, by death and by poverty. our own children, your own children, Some simply left destitute when The Hon Kevin Rudd MP As a nation, we must now reflect on your grandchildren, your husbands, fathers damaged by war could no Prime Minister those who did not receive proper your wives, your partners and your longer cope. Again, we say sorry for care. We look back with shame friends - and we thank them for 16 November 2009 the extended families you that so many of you were left cold, the faith, the love and the depth never knew. hungry and alone, and with nobody, of commitment that has helped absolutely nobody, to whom you We acknowledge the particular pain see you through the valley of tears could turn. We look back with shame of children shipped to Australia that was not of your own making. 10 11 Why do many Forgotten Australians need a service like Wattle Place?

Wattle Place was established health and dental care, poor or The trauma stays with us reliving the trauma. We therefore non-existent education, separation respond, neurologically, as the child by the NSW Government For many of us, our childhood from family, abandonment and a experiencing the trauma. experiences have left us in in acknowledgment of the loss of identity while placed in these In these situations, we may become circumstances where, in adulthood, ongoing impacts from the institutions or foster homes. angry, abusive, panicked or non- we have regular interactions with compliant. mistreatment Forgotten Unfortunately for us, the majority the social security, health and justice Australians received as of Australians didn’t know it was systems. These can be stressful It may seem to you that we are children while in institutions happening at the time, still aren’t environments for anyone, but are being unreasonable or irrational, and foster homes. aware that it happened and aren’t even more difficult for us, given our that we are just being stubborn. But aware of the trauma we have carried fear and mistrust of Government that is not the case. The trauma we Our reality with us our whole lives from those authority. experienced as children typically experiences. develops into complex trauma, that Every day, the interactions we While not all institutional or out- is, trauma which structurally and (Further reading about what we’ve have, in all kinds of situations, of-home care experiences were chemically altered our developing been through: Please see the links will potentially trigger distressing negative, sadly a large proportion brains. Our responses, therefore, are on page 19 of this booklet) memories or flashbacks to traumatic of them were incredibly traumatic. instinctual and involuntary. Many of us, as children, experienced experiences in our childhood. In things we never should have. We those moments, it is as though (Further reading about complex suffered horrific brutality, sexual we are back in those terrifying trauma: Please see the Blueknot assault, cruelty, humiliation, neglect, situations, and therefore Foundation link on page 19 of this exploitation, poor or non-existent booklet)

12 13 What are some challenges endured sometimes prevented us Difficulty trusting others we face day to day? from developing the emotional Trusting in people is very difficult building blocks required to for us. Too often we had no one form a healthy and positive to place our trust in, and if we did, sense of self and belonging. our trust was often betrayed or exploited. We particularly mistrust Struggles with our Identity Any situation where we feel We can be sensitive about our Government departments and Our identity can be another difficult authority figures, given their we don’t have control, or privacy and belongings, things that were often denied to us as children. subject for us. We lost our sense past responsibility and role in feel threatened physically or of self as individuals, our sense our traumatic childhoods. emotionally, is likely to trigger Filling in forms or using a computer of connection and belonging and can be stressful, even humiliating. our sense of place and worth. Fear of an unknown future negative reactions in us. We were often denied a good, or Sometimes our names were One of the greatest concerns any, education and are therefore changed and some of us were only among many of us is that we will Fear of being triggered not always good at reading or identified by numbers. Record end up having to go into nursing It can be something as small writing. The shame we feel makes keeping about us was often poor homes as we age. Facing re- as a smell, a sound, an item or it difficult to tell people, so we or non-existent, so we often don’t institutionalisation and vulnerability a name, that reminds us of the may respond by getting agitated. even know standard things about is a terrifying prospect, one that institution itself, or something our identity or family history. that happened to us in the Having to tell our own personal many of us simply cannot face. institution or foster home. stories is particularly distressing, so having to repeat it each time Difficulty connecting with others Physical touch, and intrusion on we see a new medical practitioner Connection to our family was often our personal space or privacy, can or service provider is extremely completely severed. We were trigger flashbacks to sexual assault difficult. We often just don’t tell commonly lied to and told that our or other feelings of intimidation, people, even though it would parents had died or abandoned humiliation and powerlessness. be easier for us if they knew. us. This and the treatment we This makes medical examinations endured quite often negatively Our experiences of being talked particularly difficult and will often impacted our ability to form down to by government staff prevent us seeking treatment early, and maintain positive and loving and those in authority, when sometimes avoiding appointments, relationships, often affecting our dealing with departments such at the expense of our health. marriages and parenting. We were as Centrelink, Housing and commonly deprived of love and Being in a hospital ward can Health, makes us feel belittled, positive attention. We suffered a remind us of being in the intimidated and reminds us of the profound sense of separation and dormitory of an institution. contempt with which we were abandonment. “The loss of family, treated by authority figures in the usually including separation from institutions and foster homes. siblings, caused grief, feelings of Apart from specific “triggers”, we isolation, guilt, self-blame and often also suffer ongoing mental confusion about their identity.” 2 health issues such as depression, anxiety and sometimes personality 1 disorders. The trauma that we 1 & 2 Alliance for Forgotten Australians, 2014, Forgotten Australians: Supporting survivors of childhood institutional care in Australia 14 15 How can the wider Learn more about complex trauma Please remember… community help Being more aware of complex Your response matters trauma, and useful ways to manage We need you to help us manage in Forgotten Australians? the reactions, responses and these situations. We need you to behaviours stemming from it, will take this information on board and improve your ability to respond use your increased understanding effectively in situations that would to guide how you work with us. Reading this booklet is the first step! Understand what we went otherwise be very challenging. Small changes you make can make through and how the physical, mental and emotional burden of a big difference in our lives. those experiences continues to impact our lives.The good news Refer people to Wattle Place is, there are things you can do to help us get through these If you recognise similar past Our aim is that everyone experiences, or similar reactions, will understand what being a difficulties in life. For instance: responses or behaviours in a loved one, friend, neighbour, customer Forgotten Australian means or client of yours, ask them if they and how that might be Ask the question more at ease and have confidence know about Wattle Place. If they in you. It may be that we then have impacting us. All we really ask If you notice behaviours like those don’t, please let them know about it. a conversation about options which is to be treated with respect described in this booklet, it would will enable us to proceed. help to ask, “have you ever spent Contact Wattle Place and understanding, so that we time in a foster home or institution Understand our perspective If you need advice or assistance can have peace of mind and as a child?” This prevents us having We realise some of our reactions, about how to support a Forgotten hope, that our future can be to explain ourselves or tell you responses and behaviours can be Australian, or someone you think free of the fear we endured details about our past, which can difficult for you, but the reality is may be a Forgotten Australian, be very distressing. they can cause great distress in our please contact Wattle Place. in our past. lives. We wish we didn’t experience If we answer “yes”, it is really them, and we work on minimising important that you: and managing them for our own Believe us wellbeing, with the help of services such as Wattle Place. However, that Being believed is very important is incredibly difficult and takes a for us. We often guard this secret great deal of mental and emotional closely, so if we reveal this secret to strength, which we don’t always you, we need it to be validated. have. “I believe you” is not a phrase we are used to hearing. Avoid assumptions and biases Ask “what do you need from me?” Communicate clearly with kindness, empathy and sensitivity, with a view We may not always know the to understanding how to minimise answer, but asking us shows us that our distress. you understand and respect us. That, in itself, may help us to feel

16 17 Support for Further Forgotten Australians Reading

Services for Forgotten Australians Additional information and support are also available in other states and is available at: territories. Find and Connect For further information, please www.findandconnect.gov.au contact us at Wattle Place: Alliance for Forgotten Australians Freecall: 1800 663 844 (AFA) (02) 8837 7000 www.forgottenaustralians.org.au [email protected] Care Leavers Australasia Network www.wattleplace.org.au (CLAN) www.clan.org.au/support@clan. org.au Link-up NSW Aboriginal Corporation www.linkupnsw.org.au Commonwealth of Australia, Department of Health (2016) If you feel distressed by anything in this booklet, please contact Caring for Forgotten Australians, Former Child Migrants and Wattle Place, or one of the services below: Stolen Generations https://agedcare.health.gov.au/support-services/people-from-diverse- backgrounds/caring-for-forgotten-australians-former-child-migrants-and- NSW Rape Crisis Centre Blueknot Helpline stolen-generations-booklet 24/7 phone and online counselling Mon to Fri 9am—5pm 1800 424 017 1300 657 380 Elizabeth Fernandez, et.al. 2015 www.nswrapecrisis.com.au www.blueknot.org.au/Helpline No child should grow up like this: Identifying long term outcomes of Forgotten Australians, Child Migrants and the Stolen Generations School Samsn (Survivors and Mates Lifeline Australia of Social Sciences, University of New South Wales Support Network) 24/7 Crisis Support and Suicide www.forgottenaustralians.unsw.edu.au Mon to Fri 9am—5pm Prevention 1800 472 676 13 11 14 Blueknot Foundation www.samsn.org.au www.lifeline.org.au https://www.blueknot.org.au/Resources/Information/Understanding-abuse- and-trauma/What-is-childhood-trauma/Childhood-trauma-and-the-brain Suicide Call Back Service 24/7 phone and online counselling National Museum of Australia 1300 659 467 Inside: Life in Children’s Homes and Institutions – Exhibition website www.suicidecallbackservice.org.au https://forgottenaustralianshistory.gov.au/exhibition.html

18 19 “We hope this booklet will help us share the collective secrets we hold, and will generate more understanding, more discussion, and highlight the positive difference other people can easily make to our lives.” Jan and Ray

For further information, please visit our website at: www.wattleplace.org.au Freecall: 1800 663 844 Phone: 02 8837 7000 Email: [email protected]

This booklet does not express the views of all Forgotten Australians associated with Wattle Place or those outside of the Wattle Place community. © Wattle Place 2019