WHO WE ARE NEWS The Other Press has been Douglas College’s student semester at registration, and from local and national newspaper since 1976. Since 1978 we have been advertising revenue. The Other Press is a member an autonomous publication, independent of the of the Canadian University Press (CUP), a syndicate student union. We are a registered society under of student newspapers that includes papers from all the Society Act of British Columbia, governed by an across Canada. eight-person board of directors appointed by and The Other Press reserves the right to choose Fasting for funds: Douglas’ 30-Hour Famine from our staff. Our head office is located in the New what we will publish, and we will not publish Westminster campus. material that is hateful, obscene, or condones The Other Press is published weekly during or promotes illegal activities. Submissions may Dylan Hackett, page 04 the fall and winter semesters, and monthly during be edited for clarity and brevity if necessary. All the summer. We receive our funding from a images used are copyright to their respective student levy collectedTHE DOUGLAS through COLLEGE NEWSPAPER tutition SINCE 1978 fees every owners. ARTS e The Douglas College OtherPress. student newspaper since 1978 Room 1020 – 700 Royal Ave. TELEPHONE: 604.525.3542 Douglas College WEBSITE: www.theotherpress.ca New Westminster, BC V3L 5B2 EMAIL: [email protected] Is there a Silver Lining to this story? EDITOR IN CHIEF ASSISTANT EDITOR BUSINESS MANAGER Parker Thompson, page 09 LIFE&STYLE

Sharon Miki Jacey Gibb Angela Szczur [email protected] [email protected] [email protected]

PUBLIC RELATIONS MANAGER DISTRIBUTION MANAGER NEWS EDITOR Hot sex toys to warm up your winter Viv Steele, page 15 FEATURE

Stephanie Trembath Chris Paik Dylan Hackett publicrelations distribution [email protected] @theotherpress.ca @theotherpress.ca

ARTS EDITOR LIFE & STYLE EDITOR OPINIONS EDITOR Examining exams: why dates are so important Dylan Hackett, page 12 OPINIONS Angela Espinoza Laurel Borrowman Natalie Serafini [email protected] [email protected] [email protected]

SPORTS EDITOR HUMOUR EDITOR STAFF WRITER

Is it the end for the Twinkie? Eric Wilkins, page 16

Josh Martin Livia Turnbull Eric Wilkins SPORTS [email protected] [email protected]

STAFF WRITER STAFF WRITER LAYOUT MANAGER

The biggest letdowns in Canucks history Josh Martin, page 21 Keating Smith Sophie Isbister Cody Klyne [email protected] GRAPHICS ILLUSTRATOR CONTRIBUTORS HUMOUR Anne Marie Abraham Steven Cayer Dominic Chan Elliot Chan Gurneev Panesar Zach Roubos Another YouTube Comedy Classic Joel McCarthy Oliver McTavish Wisden Parker Thompson [email protected] [email protected] Joel McCarthy, page 23 2 That which does not kill us makes us stronger. -Nietzsche

As we near the end of the fall semester, I can see that many of you are starting to crack. You’re staggering around campus like zombies on the hunt for human flesh, twitching and mumbling random facts about Nietzsche. It ain’t pretty.

So, before you have a mental breakdown, I thought I’d offer you some tips for surviving until the sweet relief of winter break:

• Drink coffee. I don’t care what nutritional specialists and your mom say, now is not the time to go herbal and detox. Now is the time to indulge in whatever it is that gets you through the long nights. Personally, I enjoy diet caffeinated energy drinks for this purpose, which are probably akin to poison. But, hey—if it gets you through the night, you can deal with the health repercussions next year, right?

• Don’t ignore your friends. It may seem counterproductive when the essays and exams are piling up in your calendar, but don’t ditch your friends and loved ones. Take breaks to spend time with the people you love, because it makes you more human, and everyone knows that humans score far higher on college exams than non-humans.

• Write for The Other Press. Sure, it takes time and effort to contribute to your favourite student newspaper, but the warm feelings of joy you get from seeing your name in print will clear your brain and lead you straight to an A.

There you have it, folks. I hope you take my Sharon Miki advice: with more than 20 semesters of post- secondary pressure under my belt, I’m sort of an expert. And remember, if all else fails, the world is supposed to end on December 21, anyways. News.

fraud, resulting in ten has until mid-December seven and a half years in population are reported per cent of votes being to reimburse the hedge prison. The United States tobacco users. set aside in the country’s funds, which shunned has criticized the ruling tightly disputed election. two exchanges of upheld by a court as Middle East: (Israel) In This is the third ballot defaulted debt in 2005 an “apparent use of the preparation for a ground vote Sierra Leone has and 2010. Economy criminal system to silence assault on the embattled conducted since a decade Minister Hernan opposition voices.” Gaza Strip, dozens of of civil war in the 1990s, Lorenzino vetoed the IDF reservists have which killed more than decision, calling it Asia- Pacific: (Indonesia) inquired into their sperm Weekly Geopolitical 50,000 people. “illegitimate to pay [for] Indonesia’s tobacco being frozen through vulture funds.” lobby has pressured Cryopreservation by a events Latin & South America: the government to non- profit organization (Argentina) Argentina Asia- Central & South: boycott the WHO’s based in Tel Aviv. By Keating Smith, will appeal against a (Kazakhstan) Vladimir Tobacco Summit taking The New Family Staff Writer US ruling ordering the Kozlov, the leader place in South Korea this Organization has asked country to pay $1.3 of the Alga party in Month. Cigarette sales the Israel Defense Forces Africa: (Sierra Leone) billion USD to foreign Kazakhstan, has been contribute to one-tenth to cooperate by advising National elections in West creditors holding bonds accused of plotting of Indonesia’s GNP and soldiers about signing a Africa’s Sierra Leone that it defaulted on over to overthrow the a third of Indonesia’s biological will to which have been plagued with a decade ago. Argentina government and faces 240 million people the IDF did not agree. Fasting for fundraising

Evdaev. “Also, part of don’t stop to think about Douglas students partici- the cause is to get people different global issues to stop and think about and it is hard for us to pate in 30-Hour Famine the conditions that other place ourselves in other people around the world peoples’ shoes, or lack By Dylan Hackett, are living in on a daily thereof, if we don’t even News Editor basis, and hopefully, pause to think about even if they are unable to them,” said Evdaev. “I his Friday, partici- contribute or participate really hope that partici- Tpants in the Douglas this time, the event pants of the famine will College chapter of the will inspire them to get go on to help and donate 30 Hour Famine will involved and help any to those in need after be sleeping over in the cause they believe needs the famine ends, as the DSU building at the New attention and help. One starvation and poverty Westminster campus. more idea I want to bring is an ongoing issue.” The team of fundraising forth is that if every one “I have never done fasters will begin their of the 20,000 Douglas the 30 Hour Famine day and a quarter of students would donate before and feel that foodlessness at 12:30 Photo courtesy of www.douglife.ca just a quarter that would we in the developed p.m. staying over in DSU it a lot simpler for us to to raise $5,000 for add up to $5,000, which Western world have the building room 100A until proceed with our goals,” World Vision causes can go really far in Third moral obligation to help 6:30 p.m. Saturday. said Vladislav Evdaev, against hunger and World countries.” those that are below the While the Famine is Famine organizer. “We poverty worldwide, a Along with rais- poverty line and are a World Vision charity are all students and most goal Evdaev believes ing funds, the Famine suffering as their basic event, this iteration of the needs such as water event is entirely secular, are not met,” explained with World Vision being Organizers hope to raise $5,000 for World Vision causes Evdaev. “Individuals, picked as the fundraising against hunger and poverty worldwide kids in particular, are not recipient because of their in any way responsible or high charity ratio and are in control for the fact the fact that they provide of us have jobs and are is reasonable. aims for participants to that they were born into all the pamphlets and volunteering as well, “Students who are experience the hunger poverty. Even as students promotional tools to so any help is welcome. unable to participate in of poverty first-hand. I believe we can spare a participating groups. Also, World Vision has the famine can help by “Fundraising was little bit of our money to “This event is secular, one of the best charity donating money and one of the goals of the help save someone’s life we are using World ratings with about 85 per raising awareness of the Famine, with raising by giving them access Vision as they have all cent of all funds raised cause and getting other awareness and compas- to clean water and basic the resources already going to the cause.” people to get involved sion being the other; I medications that can set-up and they made Organizers hope and raise funds,” said think sometimes we just reduce suffering.” 4 www.theotherpress.ca News This week at Douglas November 28 to free for all students, is Arts at One, 1-2 p.m. the Douglas College This week’s Arts December 1 Concert Band, led by at One event is a John van Duersen, and Student Showcase the Douglas College Concert, free to all. By Dylan Hackett, Percussion ensemble, News Editor led by Robert Caldwell. Friday, Nov 30. The night will focus on Wednesday, Nov. 28 wind, brass, and percus- 30 Hour Famine sion instruments and Sleepover, 12:30 p.m. Alumni Association the musicians will be Participants in the Marketplace, 9 performing a collection Douglas College chapter a.m. to 7 p.m. of Mexican folk songs of the 30 Hour Famine The Alumni Association and pieces focusing on will be sleeping over are sponsoring another “street beat” percussion. in the DSU building at open marketplace in the the New Westminster New Westminster cam- support the Royals in Basketball vs. Capilano, Thursday, Nov. 29 campus. The team of fun- pus concourse. Great gift the main gym at New 6 p.m. to 10 p.m. draising fasters will begin ideas will be available Westminster campus! The Douglas Royals Wales Field School their day and a quarter for purchase with tables men’s and women’s Information Session, of foodlessness at 12:30 for Tupperware, jewelry, Douglas Composition teams face off against 12:30 p.m. to 1:30 p.m. p.m., staying over in DSU scarves and accessories, Concert, 7 p.m. Capilano University. Room 2804 at New building room 100A until pottery, and South Come join Douglas Women play at 6 p.m. Westminster campus will 6:30 p.m. on Saturday. American art vendors. music students in a free and men at 8 p.m. Come be host to an information Proceeds from table performance of original support the Royals in session on the 2013 Wales Basketball vs. Quest, rental space go towards compositions, directed the main gym at New Field School. Instructors 6 p.m. to 10 p.m. the Alumni Bursary fund. by Doug Smith. Westminster campus! will be present to answer The Douglas Royals your questions on men and women’s teams Douglas Concert Band Saturday, Dec. 1 If you would like to have the most popular and face off against Quest Performance, 7:30 p.m. your event listed here, email longest running field University. Women Performing at the us at [email protected] school at Douglas. play at 6 p.m. and Laura C. Muir Theatre, men at 8 p.m. Come Wales Field School open for registration ”Studying abroad spending money, for Instructors promoting transforms the student’s the Wales Field School education. It makes for domestic students, 2013 field school learning 3D. Field schools including estimated are the best way to study tuition, program fee, By Dylan Hackett, abroad if you’re new to and airfare is $6,364 News Editor traveling because the ($9,855 for international class travels together students). Students who tudents wanting to and stays together while apply before Friday, Stake their post-sec- abroad,” said Karen Ng, January 25 receive $100 ondary education global International Mobility off the program fee. are now able to register Coordinator. “The faculty, “We at Douglas for the 2013 Wales Field aside from teaching the International and the School. The field school courses, also do a great BC government sup- program offers nine cred- job in giving the students port our students who its to students wanting to the information they take part in approved study over the first eight need to prepare for the study abroad programs weeks of the summer trip. It’s also a great way and activities. Every 2013 semester, earning to make some really good year, we offer at least credits for Themes in friends. The courses usu- a dozen $500 Douglas Literature (ENGL 1102) ally don’t require pre-req- International Studies Photo courtesy of www.douglas.bc.ca taught by Brenna Gray, uisites because we want Awards and give out a Switzerland and Belize, this Thursday, November Introduction to Writing to make field schools total of about $15,000 in the latter of which has 29, from 12:30 p.m. to Poetry (CRWR 1101) by accessible to as many One World International not finalized dates. 1:30 p.m. The session will Elizabeth Bachinsky, and students as possible.” Scholarships,” said Ng. The next information be held in Room 2804 at Philosophy of Art (PHIL The total cost, besides Among this year’s session for the Wales the Douglas College New 1245) by Darcy Cutler. weekend meals and other field schools are Field School takes place Westminster campus. 5 News Have a lead? Contact us at [email protected] Elections BC taps Emily Carr students to get more young people to the polls

like a logical step to have that Facebook and was interesting.” Students will deliver By Laura Rodgers — youth preparing materials Tumblr held particular As well as planning their final advertising CUP B.C. Bureau Chief for youth,” said Main. value, but they decided a social-media blitz, the concepts to Elections VANCOUVER (CUP) Emily Carr professor to place less emphasis on class is also floating ideas BC next month. If all Chris Hethrington, who Twitter campaigning. like plopping fake voting goes well, the students’ ery few young is teaching the course, “Our brainstorming booths into SkyTrain concepts will be used people vote in BC thinks it’s a valuable revealed that, actually, stations and printing as part of a voter- Vprovincial elections. way for students to learn Twitter wasn’t as polling-station maps engagement campaign in To try and change this, anticipation of an update Elections BC is getting of BC’s voting rolls next creative. The course, which is running from September to December March. A recently-launched of this year, has students from various design areas Hethrington partnership between hopes that the project Elections BC and work in groups to try and address B.C.’s chronic under- will benefit not just Vancouver’s Emily Carr the students taking University of Art and engagement of young voters. the course, but also Design has created a new democratic engagement course called “Designing across the province. “The for Democracy.” through the real-world commonly used to lay on the floor of students really brought In it, up-and-coming experience of designing a as a vehicle for TransLink buses. They’re their own unique, innate creatives get university campaign for a client. communication in that also working on more knowledge of their own credit for putting together “It’s more like a real- target age group,” said traditional advertising target audience. That’s a campaign encouraging world job situation,” said Hethrington. “So that’s avenues, like print ads one of the great benefits more 18-to-24–year- Hethrington.”There are kind of surprising, but it and a web site. of this project,” he said. olds to vote. Elections challenges in the scope BC hopes the resulting of this kind of project student-designed that [students] haven’t campaigns will get more experienced before.” young voters to the In the 19-student polls by the May 2013 class within Emily provincial election. Carr’s Faculty “Youth are one of of Culture and those groups that are Community, under-represented on students worked in the provincial voters groups, designing list, so we are looking at everything from social ways to increase youth media-strategies to BCIT investigates. voter registration,” said environmental art in Don Main, Elections an effort to get out the BC communications vote. manager. In the last “We didn’t know provincial election in what we were going 2009, only 27 per cent of to deliver when FORENSIC SCIENCE AND TECHNOLOGY eligible BC voters age 18 we started,” said Learn from industry experts in forensic investigation, crime to 24 voted, as compared Hethrington. He and intelligence analysis, computer crime, forensic nursing, to 54 per cent of those 25 encouraged students and video analysis. and up. to brainstorm new and The course, which is creative ways to reach Join us for an information session: running from September young people, and to Monday, January 14, 5:30–7:00 pm to December of this year, take there own habits BCIT Downtown Campus has students from various into account. 555 Seymour Street, Vancouver design areas work in Hethrington Register early at groups to try and address explained that, as BC’s chronic under- the students in the bcit.ca/infosessions engagement of young class did research and voters. discussed the ways Because most of the that they consume students themselves information, they are between 18 and 24, learned that certain It’s your career. Elections BC is confident types of social media Get it right. that they’ll be able to might be more useful reach young voters on than others. their own turf. “It seemed The class decided 6

1 Ad Name: Forensics info session (Jan) 2 Media: Campus Plus 3 PO#: A2012-0235 4 Size: 6 x 7 5 Colour: Black 6 Comments: 7 Artwork Deadline: Nov 13 2012 Arts. Best Christmas gifts for niche interests! delightful story of two By Angela Espinoza, children who fall in Arts Editor love in 1965. Moonrise Kingdom was released t’s December this on DVD and two-disc weekend, and you Blu-ray October 16. Iknow what that means! But maybe your friend We’ve all waited until the doesn’t want Edward semi-last minute to do Norton dressed as a our Christmas shopping, camp counselor; maybe but unlike our parents they want something a and extended family, little more violent. Well, our friends tend to have the Tarantino XX box set more unique tastes, of eight Tarantino movies currently on sale at the betrayed as of late due Hobbit and The Lord of the which makes our timing should suffice! Whether Valve store (http://store. to the sale of Lucasfilm Rings have been around even more stressful. it’s Best Buy, Future valvesoftware.com/ to Disney. Well, odds are longer than anything Not to fret though, as Shop, or the rare HMV, product.php?i=ATF005T). if they’re a fan of Star previously mentioned. I’m here to give you both can be found just Another game with an Wars, they’re probably But since the film several suggestions for about anywhere. intense fanbase, and also (if not secretly) fans of adaptations, popularity Christmas gifts this year. another Valve product, is Star Trek as well. No, I’m has obviously grown. Even if you hate them, For the gamers… Portal. Portal’s popularity not generalizing; I think So for your token J.R.R. they might inspire you to Just about everybody has withstood the test of we all need to accept Tolkien fans, I offer the get something even more has played Team Fortress time, and since Portal 2 this is true by now. That cute and warm Hobbit awesome! 2 at this point, especially (2011), even more merch said, I’ve got one last Feet Socks. These since it went free-to- has come out. One of the inflatable gift that I think lovingly woven toe For the film buffs… play last year. TF2 has more recent pieces is the any Star Trek fan would socks can be purchased 2012 has been a fantastic a very particular fan Inflatable Personality flip at: the Inflatable on the J!NX clothing year for film, but base, one that is silly and Core: adorable and oh Captain’s Chair. Now in site (http://www.jinx. unfortunately, most of horrifically aggressive, so squishy, this item can adult sizes, this chair is com/p/the_hobbit_feet_ those films won’t be and with the release be purchased over at a must have for any sci- socks.html?catid=). on DVD and Blu-ray of their last character ThinkGeek (http://www. fi geek, and thus can be until next year. For the trailer for the terrifyingly thinkgeek.com/product/ purchased at ThinkGeek Finally, remember to friends who are very insane Pyro, a gift has f128/). (http://www.thinkgeek. order these or any other particular about movies, come out that every com/product/e9ce/). online gifts as soon as Wes Anderson has made TF2 fan will fall in love For the traditionalists… possible! Never forget what is bound to be a with: the Inflatable Maybe your more For the modernists… that shipping can take universal favourite called Balloonicorn! This cute hardcore Star Wars-fan I use the term modernist from two to three weeks! Moonrise Kingdom, a little pink creature is friends have been feeling ironically, as both The HIRING: SOCIAL MEDIA COORDINATOR

Do you love to spread the news? Are you a Facebook and Twitter fanatic? Are you a social media guru? If so, we need you!

The social media coordinator will be responsible for the online promotion of The Other Press—including Facebook and Twitter. The successful applicant must be able to work independently from home and be available Monday evenings.

Apply by December 9, 2012 to [email protected]

Pay: $300/month

7 Arts Have a story idea? E-mail us at [email protected] Susan McCaslin and poems for a cause Hades, raped, and whom outside Langley and By Angela Espinoza, Demeter desperately tries within Glen Valley. Arts Editor to save from a life in the Several sites underworld. McCaslin including the McLellan ast Thursday, places the tale in modern Park Blog (http:// Canadian poet, times, with the concept mclellanpark.blogspot. Lauthor, editor, and former being that Demeter ca/), run by the Watchers Douglas professor Susan is skydiving from a of Langley Forest McCaslin stopped by helicopter to try and get (WOLF), have been Douglas’ New West an aerial view of where producing up-to-date campus for a lunchtime her daughter could be, news on the forest’s state, talk, where she discussed all while each of the three along with a number her writings, her career, characters go through of artistic pieces being and some immensely emotional arcs. made in order to promote important current issues While Demeter Goes the issue and raise the she’s been involved with. Skydiving isn’t entirely $3 million that will McCaslin has bleak, McCaslin’s next prevent the land from published over 10 collection of poems is being placed on the open books of poetry, each going to be somewhat market. of them connected to darker. Her next book, What makes the the previous book. The Disarmed Heart, will issue even more crucial Susan McCaslin Her latest collection of focus on the continued is that the deadline to poems, the 2012 Alberta wars going on in the have the $3 million by is McCaslin has done McLellan Forest,” Publishers Award- world, and vie for a time December 17, less than just about all that she can have been uploaded winning Demeter Goes of peace. A self-described three weeks from now. in order to aid the cause, to YouTube in order to Skydiving (a line taken “peace-nik,” McCaslin McCaslin has used what but she remains hopeful, raise further awareness. from a past poem), was and her husband have she can of her time to because even in the worst If you’d like to get inspired by the Greek also taken it upon raise awareness of the situations, that’s all one involved, you can sign myth of Demeter, the themselves recently to McLellan Forest, and has can be. up over at http:// harvest goddess whose help in the fight against written several poems Two videos, one mclellanpark.blogspot. daughter Persephone selling the land of the that can be read on the entitled “Save McLellan ca/p/join.html, and of was kidnapped by McLellan Forest, located Park Blog. Park” and another course, pledge whatever entitled “Save Langley’s amount you can. Is the Wii U for you? I’m not going to attack the positive reviews that the same; after all, it’s to be multi-platform, By Angela Espinoza, it based on ideas. I’m matter most, because a always the good games but for those designed Arts Editor writing this because, lot of the higher reviewed they get remembered for. specifically for the Wii like I’m sure a lot of games are really the I’m glad that the U, we are looking at a he Wii U has officially you reading this, I want ones we were excited idea to add a dual one-of-a-kind gaming been out for just over to know if this thing is about to begin with. The screen to what I need experience that no other Ta week now, and with 23 actually worth getting better-reviewed games to stress is just one of console can yet compete launch titles, it appears now that it’s out and include Batman: Arkham the controllers didn’t with. the Wii U opened Christmas and a whole City Armored Edition, New end up disappointing. I’m also going to take strong. It’s too soon to this opportunity to rub comment on Canadian While the amount of bad games is outweighing the amount the Kinect’s face in it sales, especially since of good, I’m not going to pretend every other console isn’t for having such a lousy I’m writing this on Black collection of games. Friday of all days, but exactly the same; after all, it’s always the good games they I’m ending this what I can comment on piece on a positive note, is, as a bystander, how get remembered for. because from what I’ve it appears the Wii U is seen so far, the Wii U dong in the public eye. looks like it may not be I don’t want to new year of birthdays are Super Mario Bros. U, and The Wii U is basically a such a silly console after instantly go after the on their way. surprisingly two Wii U much, much larger DS all. Then again, it has Wii U like some people While 23 launch titles specific titles, Nintendo system, but that said, been just a week; let’s have—I don’t know sounded great initially, Land and ZombiU. While it also offers way more see what other games if it kept all its high- once the reviews started the amount of bad games opportunities for what are coming our way… quality promises or if pouring in, things began is outweighing the can be accomplished although I would still the controller really is looking very 50/50 in amount of good, I’m not with games and graphics. very likely want one. difficult to handle—so terms of good and bad going to pretend every It may not always work games. But really, it’s other console isn’t exactly out for a game designed 8 www.theotherpress.ca Arts The amazing ‘Life of Pi’ a young man named Pi, hyena, and the iconic By Steven Cayer, short for Piscine, who Bengal tiger, named Contributor grows up in India with Richard Parker. It’s Pi a family who owns a and Richard in particular zoo. Forced to immigrate that develop an intense to Canada because of relationship throughout f you are thinking financial problems, Pi the film. of seeing a movie and his family, along As Pi goes through a Ithis weekend, I highly with their entire zoo, set journey of self-discovery, recommend Life of Pi sail across the Pacific so does the viewer, accompanying him the As Pi goes through a journey of self- entire way. The best part of the film is that it keeps discovery, so does the viewer… you transfixed to the screen through fantastic use of 3D that does the (released on November Ocean. After a raging movie absolute justice. 21). Ang Lee directed this storm occurs, Pi is left The visuals are beautiful Suraj Sharma in Life of Pi | Twentieth Century Fox Film Corporation. fantasy-adventure based stranded on a lifeboat throughout, and even on the 2001 best-selling with several of the zoo the animals, although beautifully done. book!) that should not go novel by Yann Martel. animals, including a rendered using CGI, are The bottom line is under anyone’s radar. Both tell the story of zebra, a chimpanzee, a immensely realistic and Life of Pi is a movie (and The rare talent on ‘Rare Chandeliers’ Action Bronson feat. being that dude who two million off molasses guitars, brooding strings, sounds like Ghostface to yesterday” (on “Bitch I and sharp horn stabs the Alchemist a truly unique emcee that Deserve You”). throughout. Bronson has crafted a character Although the constant holds up his end of By Zach Roubos, that is part Mafioso, random references to the bargain though, as Contributor part action hero, part obscure celebrities and he threatens you with gourmet chef (which is rare food items that grievous bodily harm on actually true), and always we’ve come to expect almost every track. hilarious. He is also often from Bronson are Like his previous “In only one year, offensive, but usually present, Rare Chandeliers work with other considered as a veteran” It is perhaps the truest entertaining as he goes is decidedly darker than producers, Bronson’s flow goes the opening bars sentiment spoken on from threatening to “stick his previous works. This stays on point no matter of “The Symbol,” the this project, considering knives where you poop” is due in large part to the what beats are thrown at third track on Rare Action Bronson has come (on the title track) to Alchemist’s production, him, which is a skill that Chandeliers (released for into his own this year. claiming he made “eight which makes sure things is becoming quite rare free on November 15). Bronson’s gone from hundred and seventy stay grimy with crunchy and deserves admiration. The rare talent on ‘Rare Chandeliers’ life is about finding the probably the lowest this to be rekindling his their issues, I still care It’s okay if your life happiness in-between. point in his life; after relationship with his about them. In fact, those isn’t perfect Adapted from the eight months in a mental wife. However, Pat’s life issues usually make you Matthew Quick novel institution, he gets out takes an unforeseen turn care about a person even ‘Silver Linings of the same name, Silver only to have lost his wife, when he meets Tiffany more, and that’s what Linings Playbook (released job, and home. Worst of (Jennifer Lawrence)—a happened to me while Playbook’ review November 21) brings all, he discovers that he’s beautiful woman as watching this film. us this premise through been living undiagnosed equally distraught as he By Parker Thompson, exciting characters and with bipolar disorder his is. Contributor compelling drama. I was entire life. This film gets a gold emotionally invested in Pat moves back in star for characters that the story right from the with his parents and are believable, but is also beginning. attempts to put his life incredibly interesting to et’s face it: we all The film opens with back together—he’s set watch. I know people like have problems, and Pat Solitano (Bradley on uncovering the silver Pat Solitano in real life L Cooper) at what is linings. He believes and, while they all have 9 Life&Style. Home brew how-to, part three

Wherein your patience will be tried like never before

By Laurel Borrowman, Life & Style Editor

here are few things I yearn for as an Tadult. Living in the city, you don’t really have to wait for anything ever. I could put a kettle on to boil, cue up Stepbrothers on 1Channel, trot down the street to the 7/11, pick up some candy, the latest Spin, a birthday card for my brother, and as before, I urge you (because you’ll have The siphoning will be back home before the to consult with your gravity working with take a few minutes. kettle starts whistling brewmaster on the you), so set the primary When the volume of the and I’ve got the green specifics. Like I said in on a counter or a stool, primary is getting low, light on 90 minutes of week one, if frat boys can and the carboy on the make sure the siphon Will Ferrell and John C. do this, then you sure floor. When you move doesn’t touch the bottom Reilly hilarity. All that as fuck can. With that in the primary, be gentle of the primary, because in about seven minutes. mind, here’s an overview and don’t let the beer there will be more of With conditions like that? of this stage. swish around. The goal that muddy silty mess Yearning shmearning. First, sanitize your of this step is for the beer sitting there, and again, Which brings me siphon, the bung (hee to clear of sediment, so you don’t want that to to week three of home hee) and your carboy the less that gets kicked transfer into the carboy. brew how-to, in which (the big glass container). up, the better. Once all the beer is we’ll revert back to our Next, peel the lid off the Once you have the in the carboy, shove the nine-year-old selves, primary (that big white primary set higher than sanitized bung gently in terms of our ability …now comes the hard part: suppressing those to display patience. In stages one and two, nine-year-old urges that will bubble up when you we discussed supplies, time commitment, and realize how badly you just want to drink your brew, making wort. Your wort has now been burping for and drink it now instead of in three weeks. three days or so (emitting gasses, that is) and has now calmed down. My bucket) and set it aside. It the carboy, put one end into the opening of the friend, you now have will be covered in thick, of the siphon in the carboy, and leave that beer. And now comes the silty brown residue and primary and suck until stuff the eff alone! You’ll hard part: suppressing look super gross, but that the beer starts to flow. have to leave your beer those nine-year-old urges means it’s working. Next, Take a swig. Hold the at this stage for at least that will bubble up when you get your sanitized beer you’ve sucked up one week before bottling. you realize how badly siphon, your sanitized in your mouth and insert Yes, it is beer. No, you you just want to drink carboy, and your fit that end of the siphon can’t have it. Not in an your brew, and drink it friend to help you with into the carboy until it emergency. Not if you now instead of in three any lifting. Remember, touches the bottom, then come home all drunk weeks. you’re dealing with about let it flow. and think you just want a The time you spend 25 litres of beer here. Swallow. That’s taste. Not if there’s a fire. actually doing stuff The siphoning is much your beer, man. Flat Leave it alone, and from here on is minimal. more reasonable when and warm, yes, but you come back next week for There’s a lot of sanitizing the primary is elevated now officially have beer. the last stage. Your inner and siphoning, and higher than the carboy Congratulations! child will thank you. 10 www.theotherpress.ca Life&Style

2. Pulse News – Free for iOS/ defeat evil—all in the palm of or during a long commute. My beloved turkey Android your hand. And did I mention Otherwise, please don’t try it’s free? those moves in real life. Thanks.

By App Man, 5. Extreme Road Trip 2 – Free Disclaimer: App Man is not Mobile App Aficionado Are you a news geek, always for iOS/Android responsible for failed classes, your on top of your game? Or do exes, gaming addiction, or thumb Welcome, welcome, welcome. you just want to be in touch muscle problems. With great apps, App Man is here, to recommend with reality by having an app comes great responsibility. YOU the best apps of the week. that serves you news right to Hate road trips? Air trips? The Each week, App Man will have your palm? Pulse News does sequel to Extreme Road Trip is an unexpected theme for you to just that! Bringing you news on here! Get your feet in motion as discover and enjoy. And don’t what you want to read, Pulse you try to do stunts with your forget! If you’ve got any cool News allows you to explore car. Collect coins so you can apps to share, email App Man at other subjects you may not unlock more cars and get secret [email protected]. have heard before. You can also awards! App Man recommends share your favourite articles this game to be played when nother week goes by and with your friends on Facebook, extremely bored on the train Awe see the small changes in Twitter, or email. You can also life. From upcoming final exams, save stories for later reading on to colder days, and political other electronic devices! Pulse dramas happening worldwide, News is easy to use, extremely life is always on the go. When convenient, and offers plenty of life takes a different direction, options! we are never truly prepared for change. So with these apps, get 3. CAA (Canadian Automobile ready to live your life the way Association) – Free for iOS/ you want! Android

1. Qello – Free for iOS/Android

The all-in-one CAA app allows easy access to various CAA Need the ultimate music services including Roadside experience right now? Qello Assistance, Member Savings, does just that! The app provides Trip Tik mobile, important the ultimate music-listening insurance information, and experience, where you can locations for CAA approved Apple certified technicians, authorized service provider discover and explore artists auto repair stores, all together in of your favourite genres. one place, so you don’t have to Laptop, iPhone/iPad screen replacement starting at $69.99 All-Access is only $4.99 per browse around the Internet! month, letting you view countless award-winning 4. Arcane Legends – Free for music documentaries. Qello iOS/Android is an easy app to use with the only downside being the $4.99 upkeep each month—though your music needs will be more Try a totally unique way of than satisfied. hack and slash with your friends the world over in this new cooperative RPG from Spacetime Studios (also creators 722 Carnarvon St., New Westminster, BC, V3M 1E6 of Pocket Legends). With your mystical pets, you’ll explore TEL: 604-553-3028 OR 778-688-9716 WWW.JAWAIT.COM forests, mines, and taverns to 11 Feature.

for one of my courses. disclosure in concurrent placing a key focus on book later.” By Dylan Hackett, Would student life be activities—in many cases international education, Douglas faculty have News Editor easier if exam dates were of college youth: school isn’t making life for a stake in the matter with available at registration and work. students trekking across others supporting early igning up for courses date? “I coach hockey in the globe to study exam date disclosure. at Douglas is a “It would help Vancouver as well. If at Douglas a natural Previously, the Douglas Sfairly uncomplicated me because during we’re in a Christmas priority? College Faculty process for the seasoned Christmas time, I’m on tournament, which we “I would absolutely Association, Local 4, student—you mull a schedule for work but usually are, it helps love it if my students the union representing through the relevant I can’t give my work to know my exam knew when their the instructing staff of department lists, availability until I know schedule,” said Lee. “It’s exam was. I have so Douglas, have discussed perhaps highlight the my final exam schedule, a big snowball effect. I many international the disclosure of exam instructor with the which, in this year, can’t coach until I know students who want to dates. highest point score on wasn’t until late October, my work schedule. I go home and see their “Instructors ratemyprofessors.com, early November,” claims won’t know my work families,” said Jasmine understand that the and then proceed to Justin Lee, Douglas BPEC schedule until I know Nicholsfigueiredo, students we have now select the courses that student and Canada Post my availability. I won’t English instructor are different than the operate after noon before employee. know that until the exam at Douglas College. students we had 15 or 20 the other “Lazy College Students often have schedule comes out.” “They’re away for a years ago. We understand Senior” mimeograph other duties beyond International year, or two, and often they’ve got other lives copies do. After the outside their school, second week or so, you’re and we do have to try sliding through the Students of Douglas College aren’t privy to their final to accommodate that as groves of what becomes much as possible—and your weekday schedule exam dates until midway or even further on into their if by getting the exam for the next three months. semester schedule up and posted Barring your manager’s early, that helps them, we scheduling at your part- should probably be doing time job, a secondary those related to monetary students, making up 10 Christmas is the only that,” said Susan Briggs, duty carried out by half and educational per cent of those enrolled time they can see them. English instructor and of Canadian college and investments. Canadians at Douglas, have ready They pay a lot of money former president of the university students, in the traditional college- cause for contention on for tickets, $300 or $400 DCFA. your life’s schedule in age census brackets the matter. Studying in more sometimes because In a world of an average semester are the most likely another part of the world they can’t book until perpetually rising is fairly inelastic and demographic to spend is expensive, and when November. If they book tuition rates, with less uncomplicated—until time volunteering with a international students in September, it’s cheaper government support exam period. rate of 58 per cent. With are made to book flights and they’re guaranteed a to financing post- Students of Douglas time constraints cited with limited notification return date that doesn’t secondary education College aren’t privy to by Statistics Canada in the busiest flight make them late for putting a burden on their final exam dates as a primary barrier to season of the year, costs classes. We get a lot of students, the opportunity until midway or even volunteering, the niceties can mount higher than international students cost of an uncertain further on into their of many volunteering they should—money who say, ‘I couldn’t make December puts further semester—heck, I was roles can be affected that may as well be put it back January 2 or 3 strain on students’ just given my final exam by schedule planning towards future tuition. because all the flights personal budgeting and date early last week plagued by delayed With administration were booked and I had to scheduling. Is this the 12 www.theotherpress.ca Feature case at other schools? The issue of exam “I’ve taught at SFU. date disclosure is one When you register that I reckon, armed you know when with only my own your exam is,” said conjecture and anecdotes Nicholsfigueiredo. “You I have provoked or can also, as a student, probed into, a majority choose. If there are of students hold a [multiple] classes for the consensus view on. But same course, say one has without being exposed an exam date on the 20th to a ready alternative, it’s and one on the 5th, a lot unlikely a position will of my students chose the be affirmed with rally one with the exam date cries, pamphlets, and on the 5th so they could cardboard signs—yet fly home if they lived alone, casual discussion. somewhere else.” “We’ll always listen “I have one student, to students. If students whose sister is at SFU, come to us with concerns and she picked all of of the exam scheduling her exams so they’re and the length of time done about December 7 that it takes them to and she’s flying home,” get noticed, then we said Nicholsfigueiredo. definitely bring that up “Because he didn’t know, to the administrative he now has an exam on attention,” said Jenelle the 20th and he pays Davies, Women’s Liaison almost $450 more for his at the Douglas Students’ ticket.” Union. “As of right now Perhaps the most we don’t have a formal competitive institution stance on it because to Douglas, and the we haven’t heard of an nearest to the New issue, but definitely if Westminster campus, students have a problem Kwantlen Polytechnic they should come in and University, gives students talk to us about it and the option of knowing that will definitely help when exams will be set. them get their question Kwantlen also utilizes the or concern into the same software for most proper person’s lap, so to administrative duties as speak.” Douglas. Regardless of Concerns on exam that, students don’t even date schedules are have to be registered not at the forefront of to Kwantlen to peruse discussions on how the exam schedule. Douglas could better The information is itself for the sake of readily available of the students. It should be. Kwantlen website. This Important issues for gives Kwantlen a noted students like the need advantage in prospective for lower tuition fees are enrollment, being a known, discussed, and similar entry-level, politicized but aren’t as largely diploma-based elastic to change at a local post-secondary institute. level. I encourage you, Should this be a rally reader, to think about cry for the busy Douglas how a better planned student? But when the semester schedule could option of knowing exam benefit you and your dates upon registration peers. isn’t at the forefront of a student’s mind, it’s With files from Steven taken for granted that Cayer. exam date disclosure happens halfway into the semester—the alternative isn’t considered. 13 Life&Style Got style? Contact us at [email protected] When healthy hurts

and depression may hormones imbalance oranges, grapefruits, The dangers of too seem like adversity to resulting in cardio- and pineapples are great a better lifestyle in the vascular diseases sources of vitamins, but much healthy eating long run, but for now it’s and diabetes, osteopo- too much acidity can best to recognize that the rosis, wasting of muscle damage teeth enamel. By Elliot Chan, term “healthy choices” tissues, inability to Limit yourself to two Contributor should be written with an maintain a healthy oranges or one grapefruit asterisk. weight, chronic fatigue, a day. You can also try ur nutrition is “An apple a day,” skin problems, thinning blending various fruits, Operhaps the wisest they used to say, but hair, weakening nails, both acidic and non- investment we can make the orchards have and excessive irritability. acidic, into a smoothie in ourselves. Yet, in evolved. As high today’s culinary culture, fruit diets are gaining Proper nutrition is a healthy the food chart we grew popularity, we must up understanding consider the modern investment, but like your mutual has become rather methods of growing skewed. What we fruit. Hybridization has funds and savings, it never hurts once considered allowed farmers and to speak with a professional. healthy may not be scientists to create larger anymore, and diets fruits for less. But while that are meant not only bigger, they to make us feel are also sweeter than Be sure to moderate a in order to limit negative better can do their wild counterparts, fruit diet with milder side effects. more harm leading to health issues choices such as tomatoes Those who want than good. caused by excessive fruit and zucchini, as well as to maintain a healthy Stress, guilt, consumption. These can lettuces and other greens. intake of protein while include dental decay, Many weight lost committing to raw foods diets are introducing may wind up hording high intakes of fibre. nuts. Although nuts But despite the positive are a good source of attributes like reduced protein, they are also chances of colon cancer, very high in fat. This regulated blood sugar, can lead to fatigue and and digestion aid, imbalanced eating habits, excessive consumption since nuts are known can be both harmful to cause cravings. The and embarrassing. recommended daily Some symptoms of intake is about 60 grams. consuming improper Alternative protein amounts of fibre are sources are vegetables, cramping, diarrhea, seeds, and seaweeds. malabsorption, Healthy eating is constipation, personal and will take intestinal gas, time to determine. It and intestinal is more than meals; blockage. To avoid it is a life style, and uncomfortable therefore should be circumstances, adults individually researched are recommended to and experimented with. consume no more than Proper nutrition is a 25 grams of fibre a day healthy investment, and do so with ample but like your mutual water. funds and savings, it Another diet that never hurts to speak has become trendy over with a professional. the years is the raw A consultation with a food diet. Sure, the nutritionist can save you benefits of eating raw a lot of grief and money, food can fill a long list, as well as help you but it only takes one determine a healthy goal. risk to make dieters stop and reconsider. Acidic fruits such as 14 www.theotherpress.ca Life&Style

a pleasurable way to and her. And then there’s you want to invest. I’d spice up your sex life. It the classic dildo, which recommend Womyn’s may seem a little alien can be used on either Wear on Commercial to invite a third player partner, but is especially Drive or Little Sister’s into the mix, especially nice inserted into the Book & Art Emporium if that player is battery vagina during oral sex. on the West End. I know operated, silicone, Sex stores also boast tons both of these places seem and bright pink, but if of sexual accessories like a trek if you live it’s something you’ve (sexessories?), like PVC outside of Vancouver, Turning up the the new coping strategy wanted to try, I urge bondage tape, which but the knowledgeable for forlorn superfans. you to do it. Of the basic doesn’t stick to anything staff and comfortable heat during the Multiple Canadian things you can buy at but itself, and can be ambience will make it news sources have your local sex shop, the used to affix your partner worth the field trip. Both hockey lockout reported a 15 per cent most accessible thing to to you, to themselves, or locations stock silicone rise in sex toy sales try out is lubricant. It to the bed. toys, which is important since the lockout began, comes in a few different If you’re serious because silicone can By Viv Steele, and ever since I heard varieties: flavoured, about delving into the be boiled to be totally Referee of Love that news I’ve had fun warming, or just plain, exciting world of tools, sterilized, unlike the imagining Don Cherry but it’s important to then I have some tips cheap rubber and plastic here’s a buzz in with a Fleshlight—I get a water-based for you. With sex toys, that makes up the bulk of the air in Canada wonder if his nightwear lube, as other types much like in sporting the crappier toys on the Tthis winter, and it’s not is as flamboyant as his can compromise the equipment, quality market. mosquitos. It seems suits? But joking about effectiveness of condoms. is important. It’s also Sex toys. They can Canadian hockey fans, at elders with dildos aside, I Couples can also important to go to a be great on your own, as a loss for indoor activities think it’s great that more use a small vibrator (or reputable place that a gift, or with a partner. to partake in during the people are thinking about vibrating egg) during stocks only high-quality They can also apparently NHL lockout, are flocking bringing sex toys into the intercourse to stimulate products. While Granville be a great way to pass to their local sex shop bedroom. Whether this the clitoris, allowing Street sex shop staple the time while those to stock up on bedroom trend is really to do with for some pretty mind- Fantasy Factory is a great hockey jerks figure their supplies. Trading in hockey woes or just a blowing orgasms for her. place to go when you’re shit out. So stock up on a hockey stick for a seasonal upswing, it’s a Men can stock up on hammered at 2 a.m. batteries, throw on the vibrator and engaging in win for sex. silicone vibrating cock and want to ogle at Ron Burrows jersey, and get a some sexy role play in a Sex toys, used alone rings, which provide Jeremy cock-mold dildos, little dirty with your new referee uniform could be or with a partner, are stimulation for both him it’s not the place where robotic lover. Austerity Month, Part Four

during my month of I’m armed with some driving). If that’s not an gifts like tree ornaments Tips to help you survive austerity about just ideas for saving a bit option for you, then a are also a good idea. You saying no. I’ve saved of money while still good old fashioned pre- can be as simple as a the impending party enough to get just a participating in the joys drink might have to be in pinecone spray-painted little bit out of debt, and of the season. The first your holiday playbook. gold, or get creative season provide myself with a piece of advice I’ll give When you’re with a reindeer made tiny financial cushion you involves the area in attending an event at of popsicle sticks. The By Sophie Isbister, for the upcoming influx which most of us tend to a person’s house, it’s world is your kitschy Staff Writer of obligation. And overdo: drinking. Rum nice to bring a gift. oyster! while the just-say-no and egg nog, hot apple Usually people stand by Above all, it’s he holidays are approach works in cider, Granville Island the Pot of Gold box of important to remember Tapproaching fast, other months, the same Winter Ale—those are the chocolates, but a plant that your presence is a and with them come the doesn’t really fly for three wise men that I look like a poinsettia is festive, present. Your loved ones countless invitations. December. However, the to when the incessant and is usually about should understand your Your calendar will holidays don’t have to be Christmas carols start to $3.99 at the grocery store. financial situation and soon be pulled in every a stressful or expensive get on my nerves. But Baking is also a fantastic be respectful of it. Little direction. Workmates time. The whole point the costs associated can way to make your mark things that don’t cost a will want to have drinks, of Christmas is to enjoy definitely add up, so it’s on a party without lot of money, like a card family will demand time with your loved important to look at areas making a huge dent or a thank you note, lunches and brunches, ones. We get time off, where you can cut back in your budget. It may will speak volumes and and friends from all areas we’re encouraged to eat on liquor expenses. Since seem daunting for those provide a lot of holiday of your life will require all the chocolate and there are so many events who haven’t spent much cheer to the host. you to show up and shortbread our little going on, it might be time in front of an oven, pony up some funds in tummies can hold, and wise to pick a few parties but if you follow all the exchange for the honour the season is full of to just stay sober (if you instructions online or in a of socializing with them. inexpensive things to do. have a car you can give recipe book, you can’t go I’ve learned a lot So with that in mind, the gift of designated wrong. Small homemade 15 Opinions. Ex-sponging the Twinkie

completely shuts down Extinction of the its operations, over 18,000 workers will have golden treat? been forced to hunt for new opportunities. But By Eric Wilkins, they went on strike, Staff Writer didn’t they? Isn’t it their own fault? Yes and no. ostess, the maker of In the majority of cases, Hsome of America’s I don’t understand most beloved products, strikes at all. The wages is closing its doors. With lost during strikes can the formerly proud brand sometimes equal a figure disappearing, many have greater than that for panicked at the thought which they are holding of losing the Twinkie out. In addition to this, forever. However, they strikes harm the image need not fear. of the company they While boxes of work for, which can hurt the popular sponge profits, and, as a trickle- cake continue to sell down effect, ultimately at hilariously inflated lead to workers taking a prices on eBay ($50 pay cut. Oh, the irony. being a common figure), That being said, the rush to stock up I actually supported is quite uncalled for. this strike. If you’re There has already been wondering what bred the considerable interest situation, the workers shown by various for Hostess had already companies in purchasing been through various pay parts of Hostess. cuts over the years, and, Twinkies, Wonder Bread, at some point, you have Ding Dongs, and the to take a stand for what’s like will undoubtedly right. A prime example live on. This news really of this is one Missouri shouldn’t be a surprise worker, Kenneth to anyone. The brand Johnson, who went from is a household name; earning approximately any buyer with half a $45,000 five years ago, brain should be able to to $35,000 last year. On figure out how to right top of this, the head the ship in no time. For honchos were increasing those who need Twinkies their own salaries whilst immediately though, their employees suffered. eBay seems to be the Some company officials only option. Or is it? reportedly received “There is another” (Star said Sandy Vassiadis, Wonder Bread is safe, too, The real story here raises of up to 80%, Wars continues to be while others got sizeable applicable in everything). a spokeswoman for as its rights are owned though, the one that Saputo. “We own the by George Weston Ltd. everyone manages to severance packages. Where does the And if all that wasn’t Twinkie live on? In enough to drive Hostess Canada! Our maple The real story here though, the one that into the ground, their syrup-swigging, hockey everyone manages to have skipped over, collection of out-of-date stick-swinging country and inefficient factories has yet another feather is the loss of thousands of jobs. ensured the brand’s to add to its cap. Home demise. of the Twinkie. Saputo Hostess is gone, but Inc. will carry on rights in Canada so Canada looks to be set for have skipped over, is what’s happening in the some major immigration the loss of thousands of Ding Dong, Twinkies producing the snack. aren’t. Ho Ho! “It’s totally separate,” US doesn’t affect us.” from the USA. jobs. By the time Hostess 16 www.theotherpress.ca Opinions Social aggression in the media

Disney shows and being “too gay” is a problem (they’re an ‘Glee’ are worse antagonist, so that’s not okay), somebody is than you thought attacking somebody. A lot of Ryan By Angela Espinoza, Murphy’s television Arts Editor producing career has been based on the idea ’ve accepted that I of reverse psychology; if watch a disgusting everyone in his shows are Iamount of television, complete assholes, the and I’ve noticed a lot of viewer won’t be. Doesn’t today’s shows are oddly work that way, Murphy. aggressive. In my younger There’s a traditional years, I watched another level of aggression; there Murphy show: Popular. always needs to be an I’m also not coming their great internal happening is teens are Popular was like an early antagonist of some sort, into this topic out of battle—while our further encouraged Glee without the singing. whether it be a person left field. A number attractive antagonists to pick out people’s While the characters or the idea of failure. But of us have younger (and often love interests) differences, and then were rude to virtually that aggression comes siblings, cousins, nieces, are shallow (“I am good attack them because of everybody, you only from the fear of being or nephews, and I’m looking” being a go- it. I know this because, had the occasional crazy stopped from achieving no exception to this. I to line, followed by as a bystander, I’ve character, who was so your larger goal, and have a younger sister laugh track). So when picked up on my sister’s over-the-top it didn’t hit thus we cheer whenever who is delightful, pretty, a character shows up group friend chats, and the audience as hard. something like Team and would probably be that looks physically a lot of their aggression All of Glee’s characters Rocket goes “blasting off considered “popular.” “normal,” it should is aimed towards “that are over-the-top, so again.” I’m not talking She’s the target audience be known that these fat bitch,” or “that black when that becomes the about that kind of of these shows, and she characters are comic asshole.” Adding those new normal (ba-zing), aggression. will be our test subject for reliefs (“I am pretty fat/ connotations makes suddenly everything they What I’m talking this article. gross/sweaty/etc.” no difference except say is taken literally. about can fit into a While she doesn’t being their go-to lines, that they are pointing I think where most of number of categories, watch these shows every also followed by a laugh them out specifically. this writing style stems whether it be sexist, from is that junior high racist, homophobic, or A lot of Ryan Murphy’s television producing career and high school are not straight-up cruel. The particularly easy for term bullying comes has been based on the idea of reverse psychology; everyone. There’s going to mind. You see it in a to be bullying—most lot of different shows if everyone in his shows are complete assholes, the of which stops at some now, and while some point, and even if it of it is in our sitcoms viewer won’t be. Doesn’t work that way, Murphy. doesn’t, kids get through like Two and a Half Men it most of the time. The and mortifyingly failed main problem is that a pilots like Work It, what day, she does watch track). It should also be Of course these shows lot of kids think high concerns me is that the them whenever humanly known that these types of don’t make kids outright school is the end of their bulk of it is in shows possible. In addition to comic reliefs are always racist or homophobic, but lifetime, and these shows that reach the teen Glee, she watches a great Caucasian; I point this pointing out that those seem to pound that idea demographic. The best deal of Hannah Montana, out because Disney, things are different, if not into their heads. I’m examples of what I’m That’s So Raven, Cory in being oh-so-diverse in its “weird,” sticks with kids. aware the kids in Glee talking about come from the House, any variation casting, makes a point of And then we have go to post-secondary Disney’s slew of live- of Zack and Cody, and a placing characters with Glee, which takes and whatnot—it doesn’t action shows and the few others. Something obvious racial differences everything Disney shows matter when everyone in Ryan Murphy series Glee. Disney shows all have in side roles where do psychologically and post-secondary is just as I’m putting a deeply in common—besides they can’t be insulted shoves them down our cruel as they were in high rooted hatred of these degrading actual actors— on their appearance— throats. There are no school. shows’ qualities aside, is an unsettling amount unless they’re the lead redeeming characters in I don’t know what because we’re not talking of aggression that’s characters, where weight Glee, because whether the these shows are trying about plot or characters always glossed over. issues and the like are an antagonist is “too thin” to tell kids, but it’s or any of that—we’re Our attractive obvious replacement for (and since a protagonist definitely disturbing. talking about the shows protagonists are always race issues. is saying it, that’s okay) overall. striving for perfection— What ends up or the antagonist decides 17 Opinions Have an opinion? Contact us at [email protected] Drug wars: pills vs. plants You may have heard block these generics wondering the same the opiate, which makes Legalizing weed could of OxyContin: it’s the from flooding Canadian thing: why would our it a poor choice for long- be better than opening powerful prescription pharmacies, but says she government continue term use. Recreationally, opiate derived from won’t. She stated in a to open doors for it puts it right up there Canada to more opiates oxycodone, and it’s letter to provincial health pharmaceuticals when with street heroin, as its also known as “hillbilly ministers, as reported by overwhelming public nickname would suggest. By Sophie Isbister, heroin.” It’s called that the National Post, that she opinion points to the While it is possible for Staff Writer because oxycodone is is concerned foremost legalization of marijuana? patients to access medical really close to morphine, with Canadians who Ottawa is drastically marijuana legally, much imes, they are and is often easier and legitimately need access skewed in its view on the in the same way a patient a-changin’. I never cheaper to get on the to this drug for pain legality of substances. would access OxyContin, Twould have thought streets than heroin. management, stating that Legislators are getting it’s my opinion that that I’d see marijuana Pharmaceuticals like “As a health minister I ready to allow who cannabis is currently legalized in Washington Oxy have fast become a have to weigh the needs knows how many medically underutilized. and Colorado before drug of choice for many of patients first.” generic versions of a I also think that it seeing it decriminalized addicts, both those with Aglukkaq’s stance substance that is already should be completely here in Vancouver (or legitimate prescriptions is controversial. Health known to be harmful decriminalized; people “Vansterdam,” as we’re and those who seek out ministers from the and addictive, yet they should have the right known internationally). the drug on the black provinces and territories continue to fight a foolish to grow it for personal No, it seems in Canada market—that is, until it claim a “slippery slope” war against a plant use in their own home we’re turning the clock was phased out in early argument that the with no reported deaths without fearing jail backwards with regard 2012 by its maker Purdue cheaper and more readily associated with its use. time. Economists to our drug policy, Pharma and replaced available oxycodone The medicinal benefits and criminologists what with Harper’s with a version of the is, the more it will turn of marijuana have long overwhelmingly support Conservatives pushing drug that is supposedly up on our city’s streets. been proven in pain the decriminalization through mandatory harder to abuse. Aglukkaq herself says management and lifestyle of marijuana. I think minimum prison The Oxy issue is on there are a myriad improvement for people it’s high time (no pun sentences for petty the table again, as the of other drugs in the with multiple sclerosis, intended) we start marijuana crimes. And drug’s Canadian patent same category as Oxy cancer, glaucoma, and looking at marijuana it seems now that the expired on November 25, and cities have always epilepsy, among others. as medicine—but Conservatives want to opening up the market had to deal with multi- OxyContin, on the other then, where would pat their pharmaceutical for generic (cheaper) faceted issues of drug hand, has proven to be the pharmaceutical buddies on the back with versions. Federal Health abuse. Citizens and habit forming, causing companies get their big a new decision recently Minister Leona Aglukkaq Internet commenters, the body to become paycheques from? made about OxyContin. has the opportunity to myself included, are all physically dependent on Bus stop or bus don’t stop? Bus accessibility for smile when that happens. Lougheed Highway. accessible. What I’m trying Last month, I was going I love taking transit. I handicapped people to say is that transit in to the Coquitlam movie pretty much need to say the Lower Mainland is theatre four days a that because it’s my only By Steven Cayer, relatively good. I say week. That bus stop was mode of transportation— Contributor “relatively” because I not handicap-friendly. unless I count having haven’t told you about One day, the driver just my mom drive me, but ello students of the drawbacks yet. I’ve kept driving past the that doesn’t roll off my used many different bus Schoolhouse stop, all the tongue as well. All in all, Douglas College. or, more likely, use your HMy name is Steven Cayer, routes, and not every way to the next accessible transit is probably the cellphone. When there’s stop is accessible to me. stop, King Edward Street. most important mode of and I’m in a power chair. a long lineup for the I use transit to go I always think, “What if It took me 10 minutes to transportation for me, bus, I’m happy if the I need to get off at a stop get to the theatre when and I don’t think I’m everywhere. This has its driver doesn’t open the benefits and drawbacks. that’s not accessible?” normally it would take alone when I say that back doors until I’m on: I’ve found out that me four. I’m happy to say we need this system to One benefit of using if there are people in transit is that it’s way while the bus drivers are that the Schoolhouse bus be perfect. Don’t get my area of the bus, nine required to pick me up stop is now handicap- me wrong, it’s great cheaper than buying a times out of 10 they’ll car. You can then use that from such a stop, they friendly. All they needed compared to most parts move on their own. The don’t have to drop me off to do was build an extra of the world, but it’s not saved money for more last one out of 10 are important things, like there. foot of sidewalk so there perfect yet. either waiting to be run One example of was enough room for tuition. Also, you can do over by me, or waiting anything while on transit, this scenario was at chairs and strollers. I just to be yelled at by the bus Schoolhouse Street and wish every bus stop was like read the newspaper driver. I can’t help but 18 www.theotherpress.ca Opinions Doorway etiquette passengers have had Get out of the way a chance to exit is that they create a sort of wall; By Anne Marie the Berlin Wall at the Abraham, Contributor SkyTrain station. No one can get on or off safely. hat is the The only thing that Whullaballoo about evolves from this lack doorways? Besides being of doorway etiquette is a means of entering and anger and frustration exiting a space, why that is mostly directed do doorways seem to at the source. There you attract people like light are, waiting patiently does a moth? I cannot at the side to allow the comprehend what the passengers inside to exit, excitement is about. when some impatient Many of my problems I don’t care what you’re trying to explain, do it somewhere else! soul tries to push begin at a doorway. For through. The passengers example, I’ll try to exit a before you cross the road. pushy lady desperate to That tall man just stands wanting to get off are classroom at school, but Mind your manners. Take get her favourite seat— there for the whole ride the white pieces of a find my path blocked by your time. Be careful and which is any one that’s as an obstacle, preventing chessboard; they get to a pack of human beings don’t push.” For many available. There’s also other passengers from make the first move to gossiping about their of us, a long time has that tall, looming man freely moving in and out create additional space too-low grades or their for passengers who are opinions of a teacher. All The problem with these two types of people who waiting to get on. of this can be done away Taking your mother’s from the entrance, such are pushing to enter before the other passengers advice could be the as in an out-of-the-way have had a chance to exit is that they create a sort start of a courteous and corner. By the time I’m considerate lifestyle finally able to squeeze of wall; the Berlin Wall at the SkyTrain station. with a classy touch of through, I end up being “mother knows best” that late for my next class. adds the right amount Recall those wise of cool. “Be patient and words your mother used passed since we last took who takes advantage of through the doorway. don’t push” are the to—and continues to— our mothers’ words of his intimidating height, The problem with these most important rules to call out to you when you wisdom to heart. expecting people to move two types of people follow when it comes to run out the door to catch On the SkyTrain, around him. With his who are pushing to doorways. the bus: “Look both ways there’s always that short, first step inside, he stops. enter before the other Student café: The Hide Out Café

should be toned down to barbecued coffee beans but I was disappointed asked how it was, but a By Gurneev Panesar, a bistro. The tables were in there if my tastebuds again. It looked so first impression is a first Contributor wonky and I was scared haven’t failed me! inviting, but there was impression. of typing because I didn’t no “va-va-voom!” to want coffee all over my Espresso - $2.39 it. It kind of stopped Hot Chocolate - $2.57 laptop The espresso was painful. after the first “va!” The I was saving the best for hen I walked into I felt like I bit into a rose cinnamon was definitely the last, but alas—instant The Hide Out Caffe Mocha - $3.19 stem. It was horrible and the only thing I could hot chocolate! Once WCafé across from the I thought this cup was smelled pungent. I like taste. It came with a chai again there was nothing courthouse in New West, overpriced, and it didn’t to drink my espresso spice black tea bag in authentic about this I felt like I was going to give me the bang for without cream or sugar it, which made me feel hot chocolate; it tasted suffocate from the smoke my buck that I was so that I can do justice like I was being ripped like the usual stuff you because they don’t have looking for. The flavour to the bean, but this was off—perhaps because it’s get from a store. A total cooking ventilation. of the coffee didn’t really super strong and left a something I could make waste of money, honestly. The service was really contribute to the drink nasty aftertaste in my at home. For any of you It was rather milky, and slow and there wasn’t a either: I could taste more mouth. who order this, make not chocolatey. kitchen, which is rather of the chocolate, which sure you ask for sugar All in all , I was unprofessional for a threw me off. It tasted Dirty Chai - $3.74 because this wasn’t sweet disappointed drink after café that’s been running like an instant coffee, I hoped this would taste at all! The owner redid drink. Definitely not for five years. I think it and there was a hint of as devilish as it sounds, this for me when she dropping by here again. 19 Sports.

Royals Roundup Ski and snowboarding season preview By Josh Martin, There are several Sports Editor By Keating Smith, Greyhound buses that Staff Writer leave from downtown he Douglas College Vancouver and Pacific men’s basketball team t’s that time of Central Station to lostT their only game this year again when Whistler daily with past weekend to the num- Iwe look through our return tickets around ber one-seeded Langara closets and garage to the $30-40 range. If you Falcons by a score of 89–78. find our skiing and are driving, park in the They currently sit in sev- enth place in the standings snowboarding gear, Creekside underground with a 2–4 record and four dust off the cobwebs, lot and upload here points in six games. This and lay down a to avoid paying the fresh coast of wax. parking fees at the America’s best terrain backcountry, you will Friday the Royals host the and some of the largest be charged a minimum Quest Kermodes at 8 p.m. In anticipation of the base of Blackcomb. winter season, here is Finally, if you are really snowfalls each season. of $500. On top of and on Saturday they host Unfortunately getting to the large snowfalls the Capilano Blues at 8 p.m. a quick recap of what wanting to save on is happening at Mount transportation costs, Mount Baker involves Mount Baker receives, The women’s basketball a vehicle. The easiest their backcountry team captured their fifth Baker and Whistler hitchhiking out from Blackcomb, with some Whistler Village is way to get there is to is uncontrolled win of the season against drive to Abbotsford and and unpatrolled so the Falcons this past Friday tips on how to save incredibly easy and a money and travel to the good way to make a cross into Washington wandering into it by a score of 60–46. The through the Sumas with no avalanche or Royals are off to a great hill of choice safely. buddy or two. Slow down on the portal. On top of local knowledge is not start this season with a your passport, make recommended. 5–1 record and 10 points Whistler Blackcomb: Sea to Sky highway. The world-renowned West Vancouver Police sure you have either A day pass will in six games, making 4-wheel drive, winter run you $49 during them second seed in the resort is open early and the Squamish tires or snow chains. the mid-week and $54 standings—two points for business, with RCMP love to bust The Whatcom County for a weekend pass. behind the league-leading both mountains excited skier and Sheriff’s department The ticket sales accept Capilano Blues. They will offering the mid alpine boarders on this stretch typically checks all Canadian cash and host the Kermodes this available for skiing and of road for speeding. Friday at 6 p.m. and the snowboarding at this Blues on Saturday at 6 p.m. time. Take advantage of The big marshmallow of a mountain that dominates The men’s volleyball Whistler Blackcomb’s team had back-to-back wins Student Season Pass. the horizon to the south of us is currently boast- in their matches against Douglas students the UFV Cascades this past must be full-time and ing North America’s biggest snowfall for the early Friday, 3–0, and Saturday, no older than 29 for season after opening two weeks ahead of schedule. 3–1. They are sitting com- eligibility. The cut-off fortably in first place of the date to purchase the PACWEST division with an $489 early bird rate is impressive 11–1 record and November 30. If this Hot spots include vehicles heading to the credit cards, but not 22 points in 12 games. Their is too much money Lions Bay and the areas mountain in the village debit. If you really next games are not until to fork out at once, entering and exiting of Glacier and if you feel as if you can January 4 and 5 against take advantage of Squamish and Whistler. do not have one of the make a seasons pass the Camosun Chargers. their EDGE card as it three on your vehicle, to Baker worth it, you The women’s volleyball offers the flexibility of Mount Baker: The you will be turned are looking at around team suffered back-to-back purchasing one, three or big marshmallow around. $800. Regardless of losses in their matches ten days at discounted of a mountain that DO NOT duck the what pass you get, against the Cascades this prices. You must be dominates the horizon ski boundary ropes at I highly encourage past weekend, with a 3–0 a BC or Washington to the south of us is Mount Baker unless everyone to check out effort last Friday and a 3–2 State resident to be currently boasting you have an avalanche Mount Baker. They also match on Saturday. They eligible for the pass. Be North America’s beacon, probe shovel have some of the best are sitting in sixth position aware that a blackout biggest snowfall for and a buddy who is tasting and inexpensive with a 3–9 record and six date will be in effect the early season after also carrying the same cafeteria food. Make points in 12 games. Their for your student pass opening two weeks life-saving equipment. sure to get there early next matches are home during the last few days ahead of schedule. If the Ski Patrol catches in the morning as games on January 4 and of December in order Although Baker is you out of bounds the mountain gets 5 against the Chargers. to accommodate all of significantly smaller without this stuff, ‘shredded’ out in two the tourists on winter compared to Whistler, they will take your hours on a big powder vacation. it offers some of North pass away and if you day. require a rescue in the 20 www.theotherpress.ca Sports

injured by the time for the remainder of the the post-season rolled year. 41 games wearing around, similar to the a Canucks sweater in year when backup goalie the 2008-09 regular Alex Auld had to step season, Sundin scored a up against the Calgary whopping nine goals and Flames, and we all know 19 assists! how that series ended. But don’t worry everyone! Surely big By Josh Martin, #4 – Jason King number 13 was only Sports Editor experienced everything getting warmed up for a professional hockey the post-season where #5 – Dan Cloutier is player goes through in he would magically one of the first names their entire career, but rediscover his game. that come to mind when condensed into one Wrong. After two games you think about the NHL season. King, who in the first round against most laughable players was infamously a part the St. Louis Blues, in Canucks history. The of “The Mattress Line” Sundin was out with an goaltender was plagued along with the Sedin’s, injury. But luckily the with knee injuries (two twins and a King) Canucks advanced to the throughout his entire had a very promising second round without career, and is best known start to his NHL career, him, where they faced for his brawl when he being rewarded the NHL the Chicago Blackhawks. The one that got away, Cam Neely | www.nhlsnipers.com/ was a part of the New “Rookie of the month Sundin was back in York Rangers and the award” for the month game one against the his third. The fact that Barry Pederson. slap shot that got past of November for his Blackhawks where he he made $18 million in In the following him from Nick Lidstrom efforts—scoring 11 points played the last remaining those three years and season with the Bruins, all the way from center in 14 games. However games in his NHL career. only mustered up 158 Neely put up spectacular ice. But despite all of the in the remainder of the The Canucks were points in 207 games numbers scoring 36 goals obvious implications, season, King scored eliminated by Chicago speaks volumes on its and 36 assists. A huge was Cloutier really all only five points. All the in six games and Sundin own. When Messier’s shift from his previous that bad? He recorded hype had diminished finished the post-season contract came to an end year as a Canuck where three 30-plus win seasons and he did not return with eight points. in 2000, the Canucks had he had only 14 goals in the three years that the following season no interest in re-signing and 20 assists. It was he was the Canucks in a Canucks uniform. #2 – Mark Messier is the him. He finished his apparent that the hulking starting goaltender His last NHL stint was biggest bust in franchise career with the New York Canadian had found his giving his team a chance with the Anaheim Ducks history. This man came Rangers and retired after niche with the Bruins. He to win. Sure his numbers where he played a into Vancouver after his the 2003-04 season. would go on to spend the weren’t spectacular, but total of four games and glory days with the New next 10 seasons with the they weren’t bad either. recorded zero points. York Rangers and the #1 – Cameron Neely is a Bruins to finish his career Between 2001 and 2004, King is now playing in Edmonton Oilers and player that the Canucks where he recorded six 30 Cloutier had .901, .908, the minor-leagues with played for the Canucks let get away. Drafted plus goal seasons along and .914 save percentages the Winnipeg Jets affiliate at $6 million a year for ninth overall in the 1983 with three 50 plus goal with 2.43, 2.42, and 2.27 team, the St. John’s three seasons. He stole NHL entry draft, Neely seasons. In 2005, Neely goals against averages IceCaps. the captaincy away from was expected to be a was inducted into the respectably. He is fourth Captain Canuck and fan top performer to change Hockey Hall of Fame. on the team in all-time #3 – Mats Sundin. Oh favourite Trevor Linden the franchise. However As for the Canucks, wins as a goaltender with our saviour! The one and demanded to wear playing behind Canucks Pederson’s career took 109 and third in shutouts who will save us and his lucky number 11 even captain at the time Stan a downward spiral and with 14. carry us on his shoulders though it had unofficially Smyl as well as Tony he was traded four years However, those three on the big windy road been retired to the late Tanti, he did not see a later to the Pittsburgh seasons were mediocre to the Stanley Cup! Wayne Maki, who passed lot of offensive playing Penguins. And to make and nothing significant He’s going to be great! away of brain cancer in time. In his three seasons matters worse the first enough to brag about. Over the years my 1974. with the Canucks, Neely round selection that the The fact that he was hatred for Mr. Sundin Messier’s reputation scored a high of 39 Canucks traded to the terrible in the playoffs has gradually grown started off rocky points—a statistic which Bruins alongside Neely didn’t help either. Not stronger. After taking and showed in his inevitably led to his happened to be Wesley— once did the Canucks half an NHL season to performance on ice with departure to the Boston who turned out to be get past the second figure out his future, career lows in his three Bruins along with a first an all-star defenseman round with Cloutier the giant 6’5” Swede seasons in Vancouver round selection in the for the Bruins. The Cam backstopping them. In decided that he would with 60 points in his first 1987 NHL draft (which Neely trade was possibly fact he was probably bless the Vancouver year, 48 points in his turned out to be Glen the worst Canucks nation with his presence second, and 54 points in Wesley) in exchange for decision of all time. 21 Sports Have a story idea? Contact us at [email protected] One fewer star in the Galaxy Manchester United. Sir misinformation as the teams are truly just might not appreciate Beckham announces Alex Ferguson has made tabloids are. Paris would rumours. Real Madrid the switch, the free-kick many questionable moves certainly fit the Beckham would never put Beckham specialist probably only his departure in his tenure as United’s family—can’t see Posh in their starting 11. He has another season or two manager, but bringing an Spice complaining about would be hard-pressed left in him, so it definitely By Eric Wilkins, ancient artillery piece back it. She’d probably swim to even find a spot on wouldn’t be a long-term Staff Writer into the fold is unlikely. across the Atlantic for the the bench. The only role deal. Even if you have West Ham has publicly opportunity. Playing time, Becks would have is as an no respect for Becks as a avid Beckham has made their interest known however, would likely be ambassador/figurehead, player, you have to love announced that the several times, but with an issue. PSG has a decent and he would never accept the possible ads that DMLS Cup final will be no real shot at competing roster, and Beckham being that. As for the Cosmos, I could emerge from such a his last game with the for the title, it’s difficult anything more than a do see him as part of that signing. Crocodile Dundee LA Galaxy. Beckham to imagine the 37 year old poster boy is a longshot. organization down the meets David Beckham: has said that, “I’ve had settling in there. Beckham Or maybe Becks will road, but not as a player. priceless. an incredibly special trained with Tottenham take to the call of the Orient He has always expressed a David Beckham has time playing for the in January of 2011 and and land with Chinese hope to be an owner in the helped the MLS grow as LA Galaxy. However, I nearly managed to get in Super League big-spenders MLS, and, with the Cosmos a league. It’s still rubbish wanted to experience a few games on loan, but Shanghai Shenhua. taking steps to become the soccer to watch, and half one last challenge before was ultimately stifled in Already home to Nicolas next expansion franchise, of the players are there the end of my playing his efforts. Despite what Anelka and Didier Drogba, and several big names on physical ability alone, career.” And now the he has said about playing Beckham would be in good already on board (Pele, but it’s progressed miles endless speculation about in England again, perhaps company. China would Cobi Jones, Eric Cantona), ahead of where it was prior where he’ll end up can the right offer from Spurs definitely be a challenge it’s practically a no-brainer. to Beckham’s arrival. He’s commence. could lure him in. for the Englishman, but Last, but not least, the accomplished everything Will Beckham return Heading across the Shanghai Shenhua are most likely destination for that could have been hoped to England, back where his English Channel, the having difficulties paying Beckham’s final chapter: of him. When Beckham career began? Anything is famed moneybags Paris their players’ wages right Australia’s A-League. takes his leave following possible, but this move is Saint-Germain are coming now; as such, a move is It’s just the kind of move the first of December, it will highly unlikely. Beckham up in rumours again. doubtful. that Goldenballs relishes be with his second MLS has said many times that Manager Carlo Ancelotti Two other rumoured in. He would bring some Cup in tow; you heard it if he were ever to return is denying any interest in clubs are Real Madrid and much needed publicity and here first. to the Premier League, Beckham, but managers the New York Cosmos. help another league gain he would only consider seem as prone to spreading However, both of these relevance. While the family The triumphant return of Georges St-Pierre

GSP to recover and at take downs one in eight thought I had him there,” For years now, the By Elliot Chan, the Bell Centre in front attempts. said Condit. debate has been raging Contributor of a packed house in “Obviously that’s not But St-Pierre had on about who is in fact Montreal, he finally had a where I wanted to be, I spent many hours honing the best pound for pound anadian UFC fans all chance to take home the didn’t want to be under his ju-jitsu just for that fighter. Most loyal GSP across the country undisputed title. Georges taking elbows,” situation. Eventually, the fans will not change their Cwere holding their breath “Somebody asked said the challenger after champion’s wrestling mind, but Silva has yet as Georges St-Pierre me in the locker- the fight. An early strike over matched Condit’s to be challenged in his returned to the octagon room, ‘How’s Georges to the temple caused and he managed to get own weight class the after a 19-month absence. looking?’” said St-Pierre’s Condit to bleed profusely back to his feet with only way St-Pierre had with After tearing his ACL striking coach Phil Nurse late in the first round, visible damage to his face. Condit. Although I am while training for a prior to the event, “you when St-Pierre effortlessly But it was St-Pierre who certain White could make welterweight title defense know what? The last got through his guard. landed the majority of the event happen, I don’t against Nick Diaz in UFC time I saw him like this is However, despite looking significant strikes 71–36. believe the match should. 143, GSP began his long when he flattened Matt like a horror movie “I’m sure he feels like As skilled as St-Pierre is at road to recovery that Serra at the same arena.” victim, Condit did not he got hit by a bus right the moment, a challenger involved surgery. Without missing a back down. In the third now. I’m not even going like Silva may be too On November 17, beat and appearing in round, he snuck in a to talk to him about it overwhelming, especially St-Pierre and interim full athletic form, St- high kick after a series of for a couple of weeks,” after an injury. I suggest welterweight champion Pierre took the valiant jabs. The left leg struck commented Dana White, that instead Silva should Carlos Condit headlined contender to five rounds, St-Pierre in the head and President of UFC, when raise his weight to 186 UFC 154. Condit replaced dictating the fight with a knocked the welterweight asked about the potential lb and face light heavy GSP in the fight against formidable ground game champion down to the super fight with GSP weight champion Jon Diaz and took the and regaining the title mats. He would have lost against middle weight “Bones” Jones. unanimous decision. in unanimous fashion. the title then and there, champion Anderson Condit had been waiting Condit was only able to had it not been for his Silva. But he adds, “I patiently for months for defend against St-Pierre’s flexibility and strength. “I think we can get it done.” 22 www.theotherpress.ca Humour Transit fare increases revealed to be part of a larger initiative to piss everyone off TransLink hopes that concerned,” TransLink reduced services, as possible for the Roy ended the press spokesperson Glinda Roy commuters can also look general public.” conference with a hint at new changes and con- told a group of pissed forward to continued Roy was also quick a future grandiose project off reporters on Tuesday inconveniences caused to denounce rumors that that may be soaking up tinued negligence will morning, “in addition by faregate construction announcement systems TransLink budgets in the to increasing the cost of and an increase in transit currently operating on near future: a solid gold demoralize commuters all services, people can security, despite a deficit SkyTrain cars would monument of a toilet, to look forward to reduced budget. be upgraded with new possibly be erected in By Brody Steves, frequency on certain bus “We know some models, stating that the front of TransLink’s head TransLink Troll routes, as well as fewer critics are arguing that systems would continue offices in Burnaby SkyTrains running due to the faregate addition will to function ineffectively “It saddens me ransLink announced something we’re calling never result in increased and that commuters deeply when I hear last week that ‘track maintenance.’ revenue, after taking into could relax knowing people complaining that Tfare increases will be “We’re really hoping consideration their costly that “they still won’t we might not totally be introduced starting in to piss off everyone who installation and projected be able to understand a pissing away all of the January 2013 as part relies on public transit as maintenance of the gates God damn word of what money we receive from of a new plan being part of their daily lives. each year” Roy added, is being said.” As well, both the public and from undertaken to further The feedback we’ve “but what people need Roy also denied claims the government. We annoy basically everyone. received in the past is to realize is that the last that the Evergreen Line feel that a project like “We’re really excited that things are generally thing we’re concerned project was moving building a giant toilet about what TransLink not a clusterfuck, which about is balancing our along, calling the idea might help calm any of has in store for the next is something we want to budget. Our priority is, of any progress to the those concerns.” few years, as far as transit steer away from.” and always has been, to SkyTrain extension in Metro Vancouver is In addition to make things as difficult “simply outlandish.”

Gemini (5/21-6/21) Want to get a better grade on that final paper? Here’s a hint: whatever you do, don’t use Comic Sans as your font. Capricorn (12/22-1/19) Cancer Social events are good for you. They get you (6/22-7/22) outside of your parent’s basement and you Today you’ll discover that you can fire laser could potentially learn some valuable life beams. Unfortunately, you’ll only be able to do lessons. For example, Cheetos dust is not an so at 2:15 a.m. acceptable moustache for Movember. Leo Aquarius (7/23-8/22) (1/20-2/18) Today, you’ll win that iPad you always wanted Your mind is filled with social issues today. by clicking on a banner ad. When the ad asks You’ll be thinking about heavy subjects like for your credit card number, give it to them. “Would any of my friends mind if I got them Don’t worry. This is just Future Shop’s new gift cards for Christmas instead of actual advertising campaign! gifts?” Virgo Pisces (8/23-9/22) (2/19-3/20) Today, a whirlwind of energy will inspire you Guess what? Today you have the capability to recreate the Mona Lisa on Draw My Thing. to invent something so brilliant, everybody’s Unfortunately, the other person is asking for a By Joel McCarthy, Graphics Manager minds will be blown! I mean, a steam engine? recreation of The Last Supper. That’s a great idea! If only it weren’t already invented. Libra Before YouTube was overrun by cat videos, it was a platform for (9/23-10/22) Today, you will host a final exam study party. comedy. So let’s remember the classics. Aries Unsurprisingly, the party will end up with all (3/21-4/19) you passed out on the floor from drinking too Where public humiliation lives on forever. Do you want a way to better your career? much. Well, gather up some friends and suddenly Sometimes when you fail, you just have to try again. And break out into an organized dance, using the Scorpio again. And again. The intent of this news report was to choreography from “Gangnam Style” while in (10/23-11/21) the middle of an important meeting. Today, you will receive boatloads of have the reporter to bash in a window with a hammer to information in your emails—never mind that demonstrate the ease of car theft. What he didn’t expect is how Taurus they are all about Viagra. hard it is to break into a car. This video will have you rolling on (4/20-5/20) Good news, everyone! You and five of your Sagittarius the floor laughing as this reporter does seven takes attempting friends are going on a trip back to Victorian (11/22-12/21) to smash a car window. Warning: the end is a little bit…graphic England! You’ll be staying in the slums of It seems like you want something, but don’t London, so try not to break into “Food, have a clue on how to get it. Maybe you should Glorious Food” while you’re there. try asking someone if you can borrow a ladder. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aiSTAcYl0_w With files from Livia Turnbull 23