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UNOFFICIAL NEWSLETTER OF THE FOOD COOP

Established 1973

Volume HA, Number 1 April 1, 2010 Coop to Purchase Key Food Property on Fifth Avenue By Al Dente

fter months of closed-door negotiations and a contentious Gen- eral Meeting on February 23, the General Coordinators and Board A of Directors of the Park Slope Food Coop announced today that the purchase of the Key Food store and property on Fifth Avenue and Prospect Avenue has been finalized.

“We are thrilled with the new possibilities this repre- sents for the store,” announced Pit bull mix Cola shares the Childcare couch with Evan and a smiling Joe Holtz, General his baby sister Vanessa. Manager of the Coop. “With the recent surge in member- ship, the more spacious store Who Let The Dogs In? will allow us to expand our line of products, offer longer hours PSFC Opens Childcare to Dogs and allow our members to actually park their cars in that By Amy Pearl big lot next to the store.” “It’s definitely a new day for hey say every dog has but we don’t want to discour- the Coop,” echoed General his day. And at the Park age our human members Coordinator Jessica Robinson. T Slope Food Coop, he’ll from spending time with their “We’ve hired a green architect have his daycare, too. canine companions,” Herpel to work with us on a redesign Artist’s rendering of the new store with signage in place. After paying more than said. “This is a win/win situa- of the space, and we’re work- $1,500 in noise violations in tion. Dogs and kids go togeth- ing on a community outreach was going on the market last office about tax breaks for the 2009, the Coop ended the er like pit bulls and pork program to encourage all the year. It’s a large parcel of land property when the Coop practice of leaving dogs unat- chops. Everyone is happy.” former Key Food shoppers to on trendy Fifth Avenue, mak- stepped in and made an offer. tended outside the store by In fact, not everyone is become Coop members.” ing it irresistible to real estate Ratner made a counter-offer opening up childcare to four- happy. Reaction to the The new store is spacious— developers. In fact, Bruce Rat- and a bidding war ensued. legged members. The new announcement among mem- over 20,000 square feet of floor ner, the controversial develop- However, Ratner eventually policy offers daycare spots to bers was mixed. space, plus a full basement of er of Atlantic Yards, expressed withdrew from negotiations up to 12 dogs at a time, Friday Charlene Powers is a squad about the same size. The park- a serious interest, saying, “I when the mayor’s office through Sunday, from 7 a.m. leader on the Goat Milk Com- ing lot holds 120 cars and think that it’s important to refused him eminent domain to 7 p.m. If the service proves mittee. “That’s fine for dog there are plans to also use it keep constructing more luxury status for the property, leaving popular, it will be expanded owners,” Powers said, “But I for bike racks, stroller parking condominium towers in this the Coop with the winning bid. to the rest of the week. have a budgie and 2 guinea and possibly a dog run. part of .” Other devel- So what was the final pur- Ann Herpel is the coordi- pigs. What am I supposed to opers were interested as well, chase price? “You don’t want nator in charge of doggy day- do with them while I shop? Bidding War but Ratner was the most seri- to know!” said Holtz, rolling care. “We can’t afford to keep The Coop first heard of the ous contender. He was in his eyes. paying fines for barking dogs, CONTINUED ON PAGE 2 possibility that the property negotiations with the mayor’s CONTINUED ON PAGE 2 IN THIS ISSUE

Thu, Apr 8 • Cooking Class: Vegan Hash Brownies Coop Membership Soars to 36,000 ...... 3 7:00 p.m. Letters to the Editor ...... 3 Coop Mon, Apr 19• Movie Night: Avatar in 3D, with special guest Coffeehouse ...... 4 speaker James Cameron 8:00 p.m. Workslot Needs ...... 4 Event Welcome to These New Members ...... 4 Fri, Apr 31 • The Good Coffeehouse: Bruce Springsteen & the Highlights E Street Band 8:00 p.m. Look for additional information about these and other events in this issue. 10-04-01-2.M 3/29/10 11:26 PM Page 2

2  April 1, 2010 Park Slope Food Coop, Brooklyn, NY

heard me. I thought I was going the space. “We are cautiously also consider different mem- Key Food CONTINUED FROM PAGE 1 to die. So yeah, I am happy we optimistic about this move bership structures such as are going to a bigger space.” but a complete top-to-bot- special days for non-member, Big Plans Paulette Wallet, a busy Mr. Webster was eventually tom environmental impact a lottery where the winnings There is much work to be mother of three small chil- freed from his chilly prison, but statement needs to be done. are a family membership for a done at the new store. An dren, who were all pulling not until the store was about to We’d like to look into build- certain period of time and a environmental consultant has boxes of cereal off the close and his fingertips were ing the new second floor with guest-worker program. been brought in to assess the shelves, expressed her turning blue. straw bales and plastic soda damage that years of conven- delight at the news, “Oh I With membership at bottles. And with so much How Long? tionally produced food has hope they think about putting 36,000 (see story on page 3), space, we think we might be The General Coordinators had on the space. An architec- in a room for breast feeding. the Coop has been contem- able to recycle the fryer oil anticipate the renovations and tural firm is designing a new You have no idea how hostile plating drastic measures to from all the restaurants on move will take about eight layout for the store and base- people can be, even here! It’s deal with the crowds of shop- Fifth Avenue to generate our years to complete. New con- ment storage areas. To accom- just the most natural thing in pers, tight storage space in own electricity.” struction and renovating com- modate the Coop’s enormous the world and we need to the basement and the flaring “I don’t like it,” said octo- mittees are being formed to membership, at least one make sure nursing moms are tempers it has produced. The genarian Amethyst Blue, a tackle specific tasks like more floor is being planned comfortable.” new property and plans for member of the Coop since its choosing non-toxic paint col- for the building, with a state- One of the Krasdale dri- expansion will help alleviate inception. “My member num- ors, buying toys for the child- of-the-art meeting space, vers, who would only give his many of these problems. ber is 08 and I’ve seen a lot of care room and deciding which large commercial kitchen and name as Spike, offered his Not everyone was thrilled changes, some good, some new products the store will yoga/ meditation rooms. assessment of the new prop- at the news. Red Schwinn, a bad. Getting shopping carts carry. Another committee will Offices, childcare (with a was a great thing. We didn’t work on what to do with the “time-out” room and its own have to push cardboard boxes future of the Union Street juice bar), plus a lounge and around the floor. But this? buildings. Selling them will fitness center for the staff are We’re turning into Costco.” help raise cash for the move, also in the works. There is but with a stagnant real estate even talk of a roof-top garden, Neighborhood Reaction market, it might not be the where the Coop could grow Perhaps the biggest outcry best time. Membership Coor- some of its own produce. against the expansion has dinator Cynthia Pennycooke “One of the great things been from members of the wants the Coop to hang on to about the new store is that it’s community, who are upset at at least one of the buildings only a one-story structure. So the loss of a large, conven- “We can open a Coop Muse- the sky’s the limit!” said tional grocery store. um,” she offered. “We’ve saved Robinson. “We can also sell “What’s up with that?” said every Gazette, sales receipt the air rights if we need to Margaret Mayo, a long-time and vendor invoice since we raise cash for future growth.” Key Food shopper. “I don’t opened. I even have the card- The new store should ease overcrowding, like this recent want to have to work for my board box that I used to carry scene in the produce aisle. Members React food. I just want to pay home my first groceries. I think The response of most mem- erty: “That’s f---ing great. You member of the Valet Bicycle money and go home.” a museum would be of great bers interviewed for this story have no f---ing idea what a f--- Committee, was outraged, Borough President Marty interest to the community and was positive. Angelina Pizzaria, ing pain in the f---ing ass this “One hundred and twenty Markowitz offered to preside the world at large.” a two-year veteran of the Coop, delivery is. Three times a parking spaces?” she over talks between the neigh- “The Coop is the most said, “You mean I can drive my week, crawling up f---ing shrieked. “That’s one hun- borhood and the Coop. unique place on earth,” said SUV right up to the store and Union Street and blocking dred and twenty more cars “Brooklyn is the greatest city Joe Holtz thoughtfully. “We park, just like in the suburbs? traffic while 60 different peo- polluting the air and creating in the world,” he said. “We hope this move will give us the Awesome!” ple unload the f---ing truck.” traffic. We want to see that want everyone to be happy. room we need to grow so that “I’m really looking forward Caleb Webster, a long-time parking lot turned into a We want everyone to be able the Coop will still be here for to the Coop expanding the Receiving Coordinator, told a community garden with the to shop for groceries.” our grandchildren. When kind of food we carry,” said harrowing story, “I was in the largest bicycle parking lot in A Community Liaison membership reaches 70,000 Carl Samuels. “Like I would freezer one morning, and the world.” A spokesperson Committee has been formed, and when you and I are long love to buy, you know, Oreos became trapped behind two for the Environmental Com- with Coop members going gone from these aisles, the and stock up on cans of Camp- tons of ice cream. I was in there mittee, Freddy Green, out- door-to-door trying to members will thank us for hav- bell’s soup, right? But we don’t for hours—my cell phone was- lined plans for what the Coop encourage Key Food shop- ing the foresight to make this have the shelf space now.” n’t getting a signal and no one should do before moving into pers to join. The Coop may move.” ■

while the more active kids and for-one program. You know and one child or one regular • In case of wet-dog smell, pups are together in the unfin- the type.” dog and up to three Chi- incense will be provided. Dogs ished addition. “My son Billy is Most of the childcare work- huahuas, or two children and • Dogs or children not picked CONTINUED FROM PAGE 1 small, but he’s full of energy,” ers welcome the new respon- a hot dog. up by 7:15 p.m. will be held at said Jock Smullyan of Dyker sibility. “I love kids, that’s why • Humanely raised, grass-fed, the firehouse next door for up Sometimes I put the guinea Heights, “so they moved him I signed up for childcare,” locally sourced beef marrow to 3 days. After that, please pigs under my shirt, but a in with the big dogs. Well, now said Queens resident and bones are for dogs only—no check with Animal Care and budgie under my shirt? That’s this one standard poodle long-time member Mike Ver- exceptions. Control. ■ not right!” Jason Magellin- keeps taking Billy’s bagel!” micelli. “But I really love Smitty was looking forward to Herpel stresses that the dogs! They can’t talk and are using the new service. “I arrangement is temporary less likely to bite.” All current Doggy Day Care Has Come to the Coop! wouldn’t tie my daughter to a and adds that besides one childcare workers are being pole on the street. At least incident the week the service retrained using a curriculum Friday through Sunday, 7 to 7, Coop members can now leave not in winter. Unless the lines began, things have gone rela- designed by “Brooklyn Dog their dogs in a supervised play environment while they shop! seemed super short. Or I was tively smoothly. According to Whisperer” Tyril Frith. Trained workers will take your dog at the side entrance. only buying, like, one muslin witnesses, a man posing as a The Coop is seeking 30 Doggy Day Care is leash-, dairy- and nut-free. bag worth of nutritional yeast. childcare worker tossed a new workers for the shift, and So why would I do that to my stray cat into the room the training sign-up sheet is Dogs must be housebroken. dog?” yelling, ‘Cats are dogs, too!’ ” in the Membership Office. If you are dropping off both a child and a dog, please specify Some members were angry Thankfully, nobody was hurt. which is which. that the service began before “He was unassigned,” Herpel Canine Companion Note: no drop-off after 6:30 p.m. construction on the new space said of the perpetrator. Supervised Play FAQ was complete. For now, docile “Always moving from com- • Members may not drop off Doggy Day Care at the Coop is brought to you by the PSFC dogs and children are sharing mittee to committee. He’d more than two dogs or chil- Fur Kid Committee. the original childcare room been in and out of the one- dren at a time; or one dog

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Park Slope Food Coop, Brooklyn, NY April 1, 2010  3 Membership Rolls Surge to 36,000, Beating Out Liechtenstein

By Amy Pearl half the problem. The no, no,” opined Beverly Lue, a t the end of a long shift giant growth in mem- member who drives in from signing up new mem- bership has also made Yonkers. “I am not letting A bers, office workers for crowded aisles and other people decide whether told Abby Plinsky to look for long lines. “One time or not my number is odd or is her name on the shop-with- the end of the express it even,” Lue said. “That is up out-a-card list and handed her line got mixed up with to God to decide.” a cloth bag, officially bringing the end of the regular The other strategy for the number of Coop members line and we started reducing crowding is elimi- to 36,000. The ballooning rolls going around in cir- nating shopping carts and have put a strain on Coop cles,” Wilhelmina will also be phased in over resources as the organization Eason complained. the summer. “If you can’t struggles to find workslots and “When I passed the cat carry it, you can’t buy it,” said keep crowds down. General food for the second Membership Coordinator Coordinator Joe Holtz attribut- time, I thought, Karen Mancuso. “You have es the surge in membership to ‘Something’s not seitan in one hand, dried the sinking economy and a Joe Holtz, General Manager of the Park Slope Food Coop (left), right!’ “ Many ideas to goats milk in the other and growing trend toward local, and Hans-Adam II, Crown Prince of Liechtenstein. ease crowding were you decide you want a water- sustainable food. “People are proposed at the last melon. It’s like ‘Sophie’s hurting,” Holtz said. “They take and mops and stuff, things which squad leader Yseult General Meeting but only two Choice!’ ” No carts also solace in food.” just take longer,” Tollerson Andersen says is a combina- were voted through by mem- means more room in the said. “It used to take two peo- tion of “foraging” and “free- bers: even/odd weekends and aisles, Mancuso points out. Creating New Workslots ple one hour to clean all the gan.” The squad meets one doing away with shopping In an attempt to match bathrooms and mop on the Monday a month at midnight. carts. Watch Out, Liechtenstein every member with a workslot, second floor. Now it takes four “We start at the park and pick Breaking the 36,000 mark new squads are being formed people two hours!” Other greens and dig tubers,” Changes in Shopping means the Coop is still small- and others are increasing in examples of increased effi- Andersen explains. “Then we Starting in June, shopping er than every U.S. state and size. Squad leaders are being ciency include one-handed walk down 7th Avenue liber- during peek weekend hours territory. However, the Coop asked to look for ways to cre- stocking and receiving, no- ating edibles from the will be decided based on now has 19 more members ate jobs. ‘Smiling’ Sam Toller- knives food processing and refuse.” The For-Gans are member number. Members than Liechtenstein has citi- son, leader of the C Week blindfolded cashiers. looking for 6 new members with numbers ending in an zens. Hans-Adam II, the maintenance squad, recently New squads are also help- who have strong stomachs, odd digit can shop on Satur- crown prince of Liechten- found room for 7 new mem- ing to accommodate the good night vision and like the days, even digits on Sundays. stein, could not be reached bers using a simple tool: the fresh faces. One brand-new outdoors. Please sign up in Entrance workers will be for comment. ■ toothbrush. “If we use tooth- workslot that still has a few the Membership Office. trained in the new system brushes instead of sponges openings is called For-Gan, But finding a job is only over the next two weeks. “No,

ten by a Brazilian Wandering makeups if you miss a shift. Are what yesterday’s foodie formed P.E.T.A. Committee. It spider (Phoneutria spp.), we I have added this proposal Needs to turn to as he will be held in the upstairs DEADLY SPIDERS IN sincerely apologize. The as an agenda item at the May becomes meeting room on May 6 at Phoneutria not only has a 13 General Meeting. I hope A dedicated nudie. 7:00 p.m. YOUR BANANAS? potent neurotoxin but is said you will all come and help us Leon Freilich In solidarity, to have one of the most vote in this important change. Matt Iceberg GREETINGS GOOD excruciatingly painful spider Sincerely, PEOPLE FOR THE PEOPLE OF THE bites of all spiders. There is Amanda Stiles THE MOTHER OF OF only one known antidote for a ETHICAL ALL BOYCOTTS BROOKLYN: bite of this kind: Chew two THE OMNIVORE’S TREATMENT OF It has come to our attention fresh cacao leaves and mix ARUGULA that a shipment of organic with the fur of a howler mon- APOLOGY DEAR COOP: bananas that left the port of key. Apply this tincture to the Heard the latest from DEAR FRIENDS: Every few years we talk Guayaquil on affected area within seven Michael Pollan? You wouldn’t use tongs to about boycotting particular March 25 may minutes of being bitten. What he thought was true pick up a kitten, would you? products or countries or com- be infested Best wishes, Now’s been proven totally Then why is it okay to use panies. Does anyone know if with Brazilian Departmento de bogus— tongs to pick up arugula, this really even works? Wandering Agricultura de Ecuador Food’s no good for you! mesclun or any other loose Everything is tainted with Spiders (also known as the Scientists have come up with lettuce offered by the pound corporate greed, the under- Banana Spider). We send this Proof positive in the produce aisle? These paid labor of oppressed peo- letter to the good people of WE DON’T WORK Adult bodies are sacrosanct cold, hard instruments of tor- ple, the blood of animals, the your supermarket as a warn- ENOUGH! Or they will not live. ture are bruising the leaves, tears of children, the degra- ing. Should you encounter one Green or brown or yellowish, causing long-term damage to dation of our environment. of these deadly spiders while DEAR COOPERATORS, Every food’s a killer the membranes and possibly I propose a Boycott Every- reaching into a carton of I am sure you will all agree Even with organic credentials, contributing to global warm- thing Day. Don’t buy any- bananas, don’t panic! These with me when I say that we Nothing but poisonous filler. ing. I propose we do away thing. Don’t go anywhere. venomous spiders can should all be working more Forget about expansion rumor with tongs and instead use Don’t use your phone or com- instantly smell your fear and around here. In fact, during Planted by the naïve white cotton gloves to ginger- puter. Stay home. Draw the they will attack. We repeat: my last Receiving shift, I took Ignorant of bodily needs ly pick our lettuce out of bags. shades. Sit in the dark. They will attack. The best thing an informal poll and found Just like Adam and Eve. Produce tongs have already Only by not doing any- to do is act casual. Then evac- that 100% of members agreed As a result of Michael Pollan’s been banned in San Francisco thing, will the powers that be uate the building and immedi- that “working once every four Eye-opening blows, and a vote is pending in Costa see that we mean business. ately call the Department of weeks is for wimps.” I pro- The Park Slope Food Coop Rica. Power to the People, Wildlife Conservation. pose we change the current Has no choice but to close. If you are interested in Dulce deLeche Should you have the unfor- system to working once a Plentiful sunshine and a joining this campaign, please tunate opportunity to be bit- week, and a penalty of seven mirror attend a meeting of the newly

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4  April 1, 2010 Park Slope Food Coop, Brooklyn, NY

Disc Jockey seeking an experienced wine enthusiast for the smoothly. Your responsibilities will include Evening shifts and after hours Coop’s expansion into the world of wine. Ideally, making sure there is fresh water in the bowl, In order to create a more harmonious and you will know grape varieties, vintages, major lint brushing the couch, mopping up any acci- pleasant shopping experience, there is a new wine merchants and markets. This shift entails dents, checking that each dog has been signed shift opening up for experienced DJs. Give us a travel to all the premier wine-growing regions of in properly and that no pooch exceeds the max- shout out if you can spin, scratch, rap, MC, and the world (France, California, Long Island, etc.). imum time allowed in daycare. Call the otherwise play good music to the shopping Connections in the wine industry helpful but not Membership Office for more information. masses. All styles and musical genres are wel- necessary—you receive Master Sommelier train- come. To be considered, please drop off a digi- ing and learn as you go. Only members over the tal sample of your work in the Membership age of 21 will be considered. Email a cover letter Translator Office. and resume to [email protected]. The Membership Office is looking for one mem- ber to translate all Coop literature, every issue Wine Buyer of the Gazette, and the website and product Flexible Schedule Dog Daycare Squad Leaders blog into six languages. This shift meets on a With the possibility that State will Now that the Coop is offering doggy daycare, daily basis. If this sounds like your dream work- we need experienced dog lovers to drop in dur- slot, call on Tuesday and ask for Sinead.

WORKSLOT NEEDS allow grocery stores to sell wine, the Coop is ing each shift to make sure things are running

A monthly musical Saturday fundraising partnership of Coop Deliveries the Park Slope Apr.31 Food Coop and by Bicycle? 8:00 p.m. the Brooklyn Society Every week , as many as 10 tractor trailers pull up in front for Ethical Culture of the Coop, engines roaring and carbon- monoxide spewing all over Union Street. They are full of groceries, produce, frozen food, dairy, meat and other products for the store. By arranging to have our deliveries made in this way, we are complicit in climate change and all the problems associ- ated with the internal combustion engine. There is a better way. The Coop could have all its deliveries made by bicycle. It’s safer, quieter, cleaner, employs more people, doesn’t clog the street or fill the air with toxic fumes. Imagine the sound of pedals turn- ing and the healthy breathing of the riders instead of the roar of truck engines. The Safe Food, Shop & Cycle and Environmental Committees are joining together to make this scenario a reality. If you are interested in hearing more, please join us on: Sunday, April 11th at 8:00 a.m. Bring your bike! We’ll meet at Grand Army Plaza for a quick sprint around the park, then back to the Coop for a meeting. Bruce Springsteen and the E-Street Band Bruce Springsteen and the E-Street Band are as old as the Coop! In 1973 they released their first album, Greetings from Asbury Park, N.J., a precursor to the hit reality TV show The Jersey Shore, and the Boss’s fate as a rock and roll legend was sealed. Bruce lost some traction with 1987’s Tunnel of Love, but won the heart of liberals all over America when he came out in strong support of Barack Obama for President. He currently resides in Rumson, New Jersey. This performance marks his debut at the Brooklyn Society for Ethical Culture.

53 Prospect Park West [at 2nd Street] • $10 • 8:00 p.m. [doors open at 7:45] Performers are Park Slope Food Coop members and receive Coop workslot credit. Booking: Bev Grant, 718-788-3741

WELCOME!

A warm welcome to these new Coop members who have joined us in the last week. We’re glad you’ve decided to be a part of our community.

Paula Abdul Foxy Brown Chelsea Clinton Mariska Hargitay David Letterman Sasha Obama Sade Meryl Streep Woody Allen Steve Buscemi Bill Cosby Murray Hill Dave Longstreth Rosie Perez Carlos Santana Barbra Streisand Jonathan Ames John Casablancas Ellen DeGeneres Jesse Jackson Nelson Mandela Colin Powell Seal Donatella Versace Maya Angelou Tina Chang Garance Doré Joan Jett Marty Markowitz Vladimir Putin Sarah Silverman Paul Auster Tracy Chapman Tina Fey Billy Joel Matisyahu Christine Quinn Lisa Simpson Colson Whitehead Tyra Banks Don Cheadle Lady Gaga Zoe Kazan Mo’Nique Charles Rangal Patti Smith Michele Williams Mike Bloomberg Iron Chef Morimoto Rudy Giuliani Spike Lee Karen O. Spongebob Brian Wilson Daniel Boulud Margaret Cho Whoopi Goldberg John Leguizamo Conan O’Brien Alex Rodriguez Squarepants Tiger Woods

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