INFORMATION

FOR THI;

FEMALE-TO-MALE

crossdresser and transsexual TABLE OF CONTENTS

Page Introduction ...... 1 The Difference Between Sexual Identity and Gender-Role Preference ...... 5 Crossdressi ng ...... 5 What is Transsexuality? ...... 11 How Does a Transsexual Feel? ...... 13 How Did It Happen? ...... 15 Possible Biological Causes ...... 17 Possible Psychological Causes ...... 19 Psychological Treatment ...... 20 How to Look 30 When You Are 30 ...... 22

Ong I I O O 0 e o O O o 22 C'oth' ..rl e I e e e O O e O e o O O O O I e I o I O 0 O I O e O o O O Oo 23 Face , Ha' I e I I O O I e e I O I O I e e O e O I O e 24 Body Language ...... · · · · Clothing and Shoe Sizes ...... · · · · · 25 Breast Binding, The Crotch ...... · · · · · · · · · · -~ The Men's Room ...... · · · · · · · · · · ~ Sex Reassignment .... · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · 29 Hormone Therapy .. · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · 31 S urg ery ...... O O .0 I 0 0 O O O O O o O O O O 34 Homofogues in Female & Male Uro~en1tal Anatomy· · · 36 Accepting the New Man in the Family · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · 38 Your Sex Life - Thoughts to Consider·· · · · · · · · · · · · · · · 41 Contacts/ Referrals ..... · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · 43 Readings.I ...... · · · · · · · · ...... · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · · .· 45 . . . And F1 ms ...... · · · · The unique problems and needs of the female-to-male transsexual ( j ~\ and crossdresser have largely been Ignored In the literature to date •. ' · One must plow through volumes of material directed to the male-1o­ female In order to find a few sentences concerning the female-to­ male. When the female-to-male does find something, It will most llkely be a few vague sentences here and there or Information not relevant to her situation, especially If she Is a transvestite or transsexual with non-textbook lncllnatlons. Is It because the male-to-female Is more visible, vocal and numerous that he Is granted more notice In the medical world? Possibly. There are an estimated 6,000 transsexuals in the United States, and we are told that every dav three Americans change their sex. In the early ·research and study of transsexualism, only 25% of the transsexuals coming to the attention of the medlcal world were females. Now the professional community acknowledges the female-to-male makes up an even 50% of the total transsexuals. However, even now, female­ to-male transvestites are said to be non-existent. Maybe because they are less vlalble and vocal, more closeted and guilt-ridden. This booklet Is compiled to give the attention to the female-to-male so sorely tacking In Information on transvestism and transsexualism.

Paradoxical though It may seem, the women's liberation movement has assisted In the ..coming out" of the female-to-male. In 1889, Elizabeth Cady Stanton (friend of Amella Bloomer and Susan e. Anthony) wrote In th~ Women Suffrage Association newspaper, The Revolution, that she believed the day would come when the sexes were dressed as nearly alike as possible. She mentioned how a young New York woman had travelled all over Europe and America In male attire and, thanks to It, had enjoyed a masculine Independence and security. ''When we have a voice In legislatlon, we shall dress as we please," wrote Stanton, 11and If, by concealing our sex we find that we, too, can roam up and down the earth In safety, we shall keep our womanhood a profound secret." Dreaa was such a topic at the first national women's rights convention In Worcester, Mass., In 1850 that one commentator wrote: .. It would hardly be outstripping facts to say that the husk and shell, so to speak, of every question now being raised for debate In America as between sex and sex belongs to the domain of the mllltner and the tailor. What are the proper kinds of clothes for a free woman to fold about her limbs? Is the gown a flnal form of dress? rs the petticoat a badge of shame? Does a man owe nothing to his hat, his coat, his pantaloons, his boots? In short, can a female be considered an equal to a male untll she has won the right to wear his garb?" •• 1111

Ethel Kimball (born 1892) lived in Boston as James Hathaway and, after two years' courtship married a woman who knew. "I wore men's clothes because I wanted to 1 aooroach 1ife's problems from a man's viewpoint.''

1 .Mary Walker . rary) (Wendell, Albany; New York Public Ltb

1919) er (1832-fe. In Thobgh she nev" l•led to pa" as a mao, o._ Ma.y E1.,wards52 ye"~Walk or••"'of her.. ' ller"lce th' rngula.ty WO•e men's olothos .. .looludlng top hat. .. th~ no•1 lo• m•~·'oatod ' '"' 1665 She w., awa.ded the Cong'""•nal Medal of was de ' Id•" 0 b1' 'in 1 white a '"'•••n In the U nlon A•my. H" i; •st book, . ' 'n ; n yoLI' 'OS of a0 w•'' p""'"' o,e,, Refo,m,.s ... who have been so '~"'""tor1 th• du",, whO o•00 '" equatlty of the se>es, by d•esslng In a manne• to flt you one of 9 .,;on ',.•> and "5ef ul Ille." Two Yea" befo•e he< death , Walke< wa5 s e the oc~71 th' ;t. stri~ke n from the roll of Medal of Honor holders "~eca~. but in 1 won giving was not of record in the War Departmen t archives, ho ever restored the medal to her--the only woman w Thr~ugh a greater awareness of themselves as sexual beings many fe~ales have four:-d .the "~en:• ~lthin. Women of all ag~s are becomi~g aware of· their m~uline" qualities and embracing these qualities as part of a well-rounded personality. The female-ta­ male. Is now more apt to accep~ herself--and .. her sexuality In . whatever form it manifests .itself. . . . . ' ·

There are many ways In wh)ch ,a female may express "masculinity".: from the woman who Is sexually attracted to other women, ·to t~e woman who Is turned on by men's underwear, to the woman who wears men's clothes aft~r work or on weekend~, to the woman who Is accepted as ••one of the boys,'' to the female who passes as a male once In a while, or who makes the commitment to live the rest of her life as a man. All of these are satisfying and acceptable ways of expressing what society calla "masculinity." The ·possiblfltles are endless.

Oftentimes women who have affectional or sexual preferences for other women have many questions and doubts concerning their own femininity. Even with the gay pride movement, there Is little In society to convince a woman that she can live a happy life loving another woman. The media has not legitimized the relatlonshlps of women-loving women and, especially Jn small towns and rural areas, such women are either completely lnvlalble or "outside" of the mainstream of society. A young woman who Is aware of her attraction to other women, but knows she Is not "on the outside" or so unlike the rest of society, may find It extremely difficult to define her place In society, to shape a life for herself which encompasses her sexuality and need for affection. Sh~ _may wonder, beQauee she feels towards other women as a man Is supposed to feel_, If she.was meant to be a man, and she may wonder If pursuing the path of the female-to-male may help her find a happier place In socelty-. Or she may feel ''detached'• from her body and have a secret desire to be a man, and wonder If llfe would be better If only she could change.

These are questions that cannot be easily answered and It Is best for someone with these questions to explore all the options available. Thia might entail relocating to a more cosmopolitan area In which people of many lifestyles have found each other and formed supportive communities. Most larg' cities have organizations to help women find their place with women of similar llkes and dislikes. The best advice Is to talk to many women-and men-of many different lifestyles. Imagine yourself In their place, or how you might modify their situations to please yourself. Attend many functions, see many things. Through communication wlll be gained a better understanding and exposure to alternative lifestyles and Polllbllltlee-e necaaalty to finding your special place,

3 n when still Unfortunately, It Is still true that the female-to-m~1 e, ~: from many a female, Is often badly misunderstood and I or OS rac1 change from lesbian and women's sexuality support groups. T~e political self· female to male seems to threaten some women s elt by only a righteousness-as though this deeply personal traum~ frights were few could possibly affect women's gains. Women 8 women who championed by the female-to-male of years past, those as theY 0 dared to wear trousers which enabled them to com:i an~fg feminine pleased Instead of being confined to the shac es superiority f rlppery. The female-to-male is no threat to the ultlmat~e Men In of the female body. Men and women are NOT the sa n In female male bodies have a lower life expectancy than W.~me e" does not bodies. The female-to-male's perception of self as mal r 00 •HoW stem In total from social role disharmony (read furtri~e th'at the Does a Transsexual Feel?'). Women should rea rnanY ways female-to-male Is a complex treasure of Insights Into the d rnentallY· we all (men and women) express ourselves physically a~ polltlCSllY The female-to-male usually looks first to sexua~ly ~n my seeldnQ aware women to help make sense of their sexual d1cho 0 ale~ do not information to guide them and emotional support. M ner socletY have the market on "sexual dysfunction .. " ~h .e so~n and girls, accepts the varieties of active sexual expression in wom·mage of the the better will be the positive self-concept and body 1 ho wrote t~ females of the future. A word of advice from a woman wossdresser. the newspapers in 1897 In defense of a female-to-male er t thinl< it 3 "I do not know Miss B., but she is a woman, and I do ~onot happen woman:s place to try to injure a sister because she do~ clothes an~ to live Just as we do; and If she wants to wear men 5 business· have sixteen pockets It Is none of our , eel< , vlston-chhat Don t let stereotypes or false assumptions cloud your there, t ed It out. You'll want to be able to say that you've bee",ve select t you've perso.nally experienced each road, and that Y°a':ce years-b~ t~e on~ you liked best. This process will (and should) t Id anY ha5 ~ It s ~~ impQrtant Investment in the rest of your life. Avowere afrai~ decisions. Don't miss out on something because you field can ':-good therapist with experience in the gender ldentltY icating wit11 invaluable if you feel the need to talk about It. Commun 1 rnperatl~e. other female-to-males If only by telephone or mall, Is 1 ~

u uuuuu u nin worria r· A Sequel C f' 11ot bY a c tia an Ame .' a. irehouse bears the following plaque· ''The first ba 3 1868 bY was a 1 lotte cc~~~;y) ~~si~:ntial election was cast on this ·site Novembr~e r fife. sn:d 5110 0 stagecoach drive/. urst who masqueraded as a man for much sh da ys 8 . are~ · 5 and kllled at least in the Mother Lode country during the Gold Ruoach in th'r1ed in She died In 1879 ~ne ban~it. In her later years she drove a stagec she IS bl.I Watsonville." · ot until then was she found to be a woman.

4 . . THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN SEXUAL /DENT/TV AND GENDER-ROLEPREFERENCE ·

A distinction must be made betWeen basic sexual Identity (am 1 a boy or a glrl?) and gender-role preference (do I prefer typlcally ••masculine'' or typlcally ••feminine'' things?). Whlle many girls of· 7 or 12 prefer participating In the more adventurous and autonomous activities of same-aged boys, they see themselves aa females. They have adopted a masculloe gender-role preference but maintain a basic female sexual Identity. With adolescence, social circumstances change such that advantages accrue from being a glrl and gender-role behavior modifies accordingly. Because tomboylsh­ ness usually arouaes no concern In parents and society, very fews tomboys are brought for evaluation by gender Identity professional& and consequently the understanding of the development of an enduring masculine Identity In young glrls Is at a primitive level. Our culture has changed quickly and dramatically In Its perception of what typically masculine things girls can do and still be .. feminine." Girls are now encouraged to do things for which, 30 years ago, they would have been punished. CROSSORESSING A young woman going through puberty, becoming aware of herself as a sexual being, and reallzlng that men's clothing or underwear turn her on can be a very Isolated and frightened person. Nowhere has any erotic connotation been associated with men 'a garments, and there Is little mention, even In this sex-conscious society, of other women who feel the way she does. She may comb llbrarles trying to understand her feelings, only to find the leaders In the gender Identity fleld ambivalent even about her existence:

I have never seen or heard of a woman who Is a blologlcally normal female and does not question that she was properly assigned as a female, who Is an Inter­ mittent, fetishistic crossdresser. There are an extremely rare number of females who dress a// the time as men, live as men, work as men-In fact pass unrecognized In society as men. These women are transsexuals, they wish to be males, live In all ways as a man does. They cannot stomach sexual relations with men; they are aroused only by women. Men's clothes have no erotic value whatsoever; these people have no clothing fetish. Neither they nor other women have a fetishistic relation­ ship to male apparel: they do not become sexually •••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••o••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••o••••••••••• In the late 1800's Madame Dleulafoy discovered the ruins of the Temple of Darius, an accompllshme~t for which the French government decorated her with the Order of the Legion of Honor, and gave her the right to wear men's attire at all times. 5 In 1906, Vesta Tiiiey, known In London aa "Algy," was the highest Paid male lmper­ IOnator, earning $10 for each minute she occupied the stage In New York, singing vaudev111e ditties ent1t1ed, " The Piccadilly Johnny With the little Glass Eye" and " Following In Father's Footsteps. "

6 excited by such objects. It can be said that there are male transvestites and male transsexuals; among women there are female transsexuals but no female transvestites. Sex and Gender, by Robert J. Stoller (New York: Science House, 1968)

Female transvestism seems to be rare or of somewhat doubtful reality. Women's fashions are such as to allow a female transvestite to indulge her wish to wear male attire without being too conspicuous. Her deviation has been considered merely arrogant.•.. '' The Transsexual Phenomenon, by Harry Benjamin (New York: Warner Books, Inc., 1988)

Is it any wonder that the female crossdresser hesitates to come forward? It would be quite a stigma to be known as the world's first and only woman who gets off on jockey shorts! Are gender specialists actually encouraging women to take the transsexual route by denying a possible existence as a •'female transvestite''?

Until recently (and It Is still true In many places) It was not socially acceptable for a woman to admit ANY of her sexual desires. Women could not admit that they wanted sex, enjoyed sex, or that they masturbated. While It was "naughty" for boys to do, girls (we were told) simply "never did" such thlngsl Maybe women In men's clothes have been tolerated and overlooked because society found It improper to believe such behavior could mean anything sexual to a woman. Our society Is presently struggling to accept the fact that women DO desire sex and find It as pleasurable as men do •.. and that women find the body sexually exciting. It wlll probably take a long, long time for society to accept the fact that some women are sexually stimulated by men's clothes, or by the fantasy of being a man, or of being a man In a woman's arms. Women are now finally admitting to rich fantasy lives-several books of these fantasies have been published. It Is especially liberating to find your own fantasies shared by others. Y&!! there are others who do It I Consider a few of these: "My husband left some of his clothes behind when he was here last, and the other thing I like to do is dress up In them. I especially like to put on his underwear. The fly ------Rosa Bonheur (1822-99), French painter of animals, was issued a permit to dress legally as a man In 1857. "As for males," she once said, 11 1 like only the bulls I paint." 7 front Just fascinates me. That's when I /Ike to put another Tampax In, through the.slit opening, and I try to get It so that It hangs out... not all the way In, you know? But the angle Is wrong, isn't It? I mean, men have It coming out In front, but the Tampax just points down, and you can't sit down naturally. But it's very exciting and I Imagine that I'm Harry, Just dressed In these slit-front shorts ...• "

''Sometimes I like to Imagine what It would be /Ike to have a penis like a guy and have sex with a girl. '' "My 'fantasy' lover Is always with me day and night, and I find her very exciting. She is a 'masculine'-looklng woman dressed In 'drag' (men's dress). When we go to bed she Is very gentle and understanding and a great lover-much better than a man. I would never exchange her for a man. " · three different women In My Secret Garden, by Nancy Friday (New York: Pocket Books, 1973)

.Male dress gave her a sense of freedom and enhanced the fantasy of her masculinity while she was making love to boys or girls. When she wished to look feminine, she borrowed the dresses of an effeminate homosexual with whom she was living. 'I have tailored slacks bflCBUSB I think it's pathetic to run around in pants with a fly. It looks like a sad Imitation. I can be a masculine girl, but not a man.' Dr. George W. Henry in All the Sexes (New York, 1955)

I have a drawer full of men's underwear and socks. I even have a couple of Jock straps that I /Ike to wear. 1 fJ.Ut on the Jock, the shorts, a pair of trousers and 8 sh1rt. Then I have this full-length mirror that I stand 1~ front of and look at myself. Finally, / try to Imagine that 1 AM a man ••• / know that I'm not and never will bfl, bU I really dig ~n the fantasy.

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It Is doubtful that Cal as an tndlan fighter, hunte~~~ Jane ever had a skirt on In her llfe. She wonJr~: Hllls. · She always associated apper, scout, poker player and miner In the 8 uved a dozen husbands. In 190~lt~ men and llved a man's llfe, although she 0~~ouse to end her days. 11she ne' a age 48, she was admitted to a Montana poo than a thousand miles out of he~e~ sought a quarrel, but never would go moyr~nsult to her sex.'' ay to avoid one, and was quick to avenge an 8 CALAMITY JANE 9 You know, when I finally worked up the courage to tell my husband that I really dug dressing in men's clothes, I thought he was going to pass out. He simply co~ld~'t handle it. He wanted me to go to a psych1atflst immediately. I have a favorite fantasy that I hope some day to be able to fulfill. I'd like to strap on a dildo--/ have a coup!~ of them and I do this alone maybe twice a month--bu~ I like to do it with a man. Anyway, / 'd strap on the dildo, put on the shorts, hell, everything, and then the ma~ and I would start to talk about sexy stuff. We'd ta about anything and everything that excited us. May~e even l~ok at some porno movies or books. Have a coupld o~ drmks to lower the inhibitions. Then, we wo~ discuss mutual masturbation. I mean masturbatmg o~rse/ves together, not masturbating one another; Fma/ly, he would take out his dick and I would take ou m~, dildo and we would give them a work!ng,,av~y Interview with a Female Transvestite, Bruce Arthur, Nugget Yearbook, 1980 Probably th female crossdressere tm~t lmp~rtant and reassuring thing tor ftke her. Crossdressi o now is that, yes, there are others act In the 17th ~g has by no means been a male preserve ... in f ; of women w: dr~at~ centuries, there are more recorded r'::r~ 8re women who ss and passed as men than vice versa. ar bY slipping on a bec~me aroused by wearing men's underwehere Is nothing ''t.in~~~ S ~!arched white shirt or wingtip shoeds. Trive to understand a ra 1 about her feelings. She shoul 8 gs as good and rl ~~ accept her own individual motives and fee~~ this eroticism th~u for her. The female crossdresser can enJ ~rtner who is willing t~rout her life, and may even find a sexual ~ plaY· ncorporate her transvestism into their sexu 1 Female crossdress le crosS" dressers. She ma ers may take on as many aspects as ma tficBJIY erotic items of my °nly be interested in having a few sp~ssion 5 · ~he might want toa 1e apparel for sporadic masturbatory ds y under , e~~sua1 female cl~~Tr male underwear throughout the ~ 6 flOrt!: n e evenings to ng, or only to bed at night. some c0 r ,,,en t 6 ~~th~ng. To the pu~~~ their female clothing and don •r:: 81H' g 8 nows it's a litt~ eye, she does not appear unusua mettilri more comfortable." e more than just "slipping into so •'' •••••••••• •••••••••• •••• ••• ••••••••••• • •••••• ············•············· -~ Katherine Voeba I< cl6' ·19 restaurante ugh (1827-1907) as , I>',, rid 11 secret w ur' COok and ah spent 80 years as a man, working ,,ts 6 1st1°" 1 0 8 men's a=:r: ~erld In 8 ~~h~rder. "Frenchy" contracted pnf~ct'"1o r1;ri1t1' .'Grandpa.• ' 8 Work9c1 the P al In Trinidad, Colo. where, c the ri 10 1aat two years of his life, known bY WHAT IS TRANSSEXUAL/TY?

~r. Harry Benjamin, who knew Sigmund Freud and Havelock Ellis, coined the term 11transsexual" and, at age 81, published the classic The Transsexual Phenomenon. Heralded as one of the world's pioneers in the field of sexology, this ''Father of Transsexuals '' who recently celebrated his 100th birthday, identifies four principal fundamental motives why transsexuals seek sex reassignment: 1) sexual motive-to have a sexually functional body 2) gender motive-to be free to llve In their chosen role 3) legal motive-to legalize their lifestyle of croasdresslng and living as the opposite sex 4) social motive-If the patient has markedly opposite-sex manners or appearance People who wish to change their sex are not recent developments. Since the beginning of time there are records of women who disguised themselves so they could live as men. A sampling of these life stories are sprinkled throughout this booklet. Some passed their entire lives without anyone discovering their true sex. Think of the Isolation, the loneliness, the fear these lndlvlduats experienced every single day of their lives. Think of the pleasures of everyday llvlng that others take for granted that were completely out of reach for these people: the lack of physical Intimacy; the bindings and self­ made undergarments worn In deaperatlon to alter their bodies; the loss of family and friends who knew them .. before" an~ whose love and friendships had to be sacrificed to minimize the risk of discovery; the lnaccesalblllty of medical attention (many died of dlseaaes because they could not risk revealing their secret to a physician). An educated understanding of transsexualism and medical treatment of those experiencing this condition are now righting those wrongs. la sex reassignment surgery moral I right? •'If a patient came to you and wanted you to remove his normal left eye or his right hand, would you do that, just because he asked you to?'' A patient who comes In with such a request Is, on the face of it, acutely psychotic. Transsexuals are not psychotic. Further, trans­ sexuals do not want a useful organ removed, reducing their efficiency· but they want a more or leas (to them) useless sexual I equlpmen't altered so that a more or less useful (to them) equipment will result.

··------Havelock EHie reported the case of "BUI," who In 1909 at age 22 had llved since age 13 88 a man; and once served as local secretary of the International Brother- hood of Bollermakera In St. Loull. 1· In 1115 Milton B. Mabon, "an English swell, much addicted to 1llk hall, patent ...ther boots and other fine raiment," wa1 arrn ted In Lot Gatos, Clllf., 1°'· algnlng c:hecltt m.cte out to Luisa E. B. Mabon, and tlnally edmltted they were:; and the ume person. When approached by the pr... , Maton decla ' "II aeem1 outrageou1 thet a man c:11nnot have any peace, but mu1t be ~ lo cle9th by reporteral Why, I have been wearing this 1tyl• of co1tum• for the laat 21 y.. ra and I wouldn't ••r any other. Thi• thing of being 1kewed up In t~ld ••Itta and aubjec:t to the Happing of petticoats la to me unbearable. I nevtf t en)oy the feminine style of dr... , and before I took to men'• clothel out-a~,· &aMcl to get myMll up u much Ilk• a CSude 11 poulble." After 3 week• In ~~ the chargea were dlamllMd and M1bon left wearing hi• mil• 1ttlre, flv• day• ::CO· •lgnlftG • contract with one of the dime muMum managen of Sin frtne t "Her pert •Ill not be a difficult one. She wlll be faultleuly 1ttlred In pa:. leathers, a hendaome dr... ault, embroidered llrMtn 1nd 1 whit• tie. Sh• wlll r9C wlll tt In •n ••Y chair on a llttl• platform for the benefit of the curtoua public. She f1 a~~r questions and chat with the aoclally lncllned." Mitton reg1rded thl• aa one of the lnevltab... of Ille ... HOW DOES A TRANSSEXUAL FEEL?

Sex roles and their Influence on transsexualism Is a big controversy .Feminists have typically lashed out at transsexuals, condemning the male-to-female as a threat to womankind .and arguing that female-to-males should accept themselves as strong, liberated ~omen/lesbians, Instead of crossing over to the "other side" and .. denying their femaleness." But transsexuals don't go to the other side'' to conform to stereotypes. It's absurd to think people would so readily lop off body parts just to be a ••more masculine'' corporate executive. They go to the other side because It is the only way to express on the outside how they feel on the Inside (the same reason gays come out).

There are reasons other than predefined sex roles for our behavior towards one another. Stereotypical sex role behavior should not be confused with the way our bodies (sexuality) govern our relation­ ships with men and women. As long as there are heterosexuals and homosexuals, women will never relate to men the way men· relate to men, and men will never relate to women the way women relate to women, despite the breakdown of rigid sex roles. This has nothing to do with being passive or aggressive, feminine or masculine. It has to do with relating to someone from the groundwork of our basic sexuality. As long as the naked body elicits responses from men and women, there will be transsexuals. Women who adjust their bodies to look llke men do so In order to relate to men the way men relate to men, and to women the way men relate to women, be they gay or straight.

Transsexuals understand the subtleties of role-playing .•. they have participated In an unnatural role throughout their live~. very much the same way a gay person faces the unnatural role of heterosexuality much of their lives. Transsexuals also understand the subtle similarities between men and women, and are living examples that men and women are not so different. In addition, the transsexual understands first-hand the physical influence of living In the body of each .sex, how hormones affect behavio;r, how the shape and sexual attributes of one's body affects the person within that body. It Is simply not true that penis-or-vagina Is the only difference. Even the feminist movement has abandoned the hypothesis that men and women are the same. Men and women are very different but women and men are also very similar. In The G-Spoi, and Other R'ecent Discoveries About Human Sexuality a book all female-to-males.should read, the authors say, "The evidence we present Indicates that women and men are more alike sexually than had been previously imagined." •••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• Johann Burger was arrested In st. Louis, 1908, for male Impersonation and "abduction" as his marriage to a young woman was called. Burger declared she "fell herself ~holly llke 8 man," saying a mistake of nature resulted In ~er female bOdy and that she "would suffer any penalty" rather than wear women s clothes. 13 The t~Ual'a lnabii11y to adJuat to sex-rote ex~kxti il·ftoi: the entire sphere of the t1'811818xual'1 predicament. Most people experience some dllcomfort with role expectations, • cl~ · demonatrated In the wornen'a llberatlon movement, but they •••v no question In their minds whether they are men or women. More . profoundly, the tranaaexual experiences a· distorted bOdY I~· Dealing ~Ith one'a thoughts and feelings 11 one thing; deallnG with ·· one•a physical aexuallty la quite another. To Identify strongly with the atereotyplcal thoughta/feellnga of the opposite aex can be 8 dichotomy. but to Identify strongly with the physical attributes of · the opposite sex la totally disorienting.

· Even bef~e pursuing any medical/ aurglcal I hormonal change, thhe female-to-male experlencea her male body every alngle day of er llf(:t. Through strong engulflng fantasy she "feels'' her broad •houldera, '·'feels" her flat cheat, her low voice. She feels a needth~: carry more bulk between her legs, and may wear padding. With •If-Image,· aha la met In the mirror wary sing le day of her Ufe bY aomeone aha doesn't recognize. She knows she has a female bOdY· but It la something that doesn't Jive with her aelf-~ptlon. She knows •he has breaate, but considers them growths that have · no pleasurable sensation. :!i8 Y~~g glrl. It la eaalw for the female-to-male to Identify : llkeY t~lra ~~h andad fantasize she Is one, beca~se her ch88~- grow1n f • olescence comes menstruation and ,8 She mag r:" her cheat. Her body la clearly no longer like a bOYent about : •hamed of these developments and I or very arnblval 0 th th 8 sensations In them. At first she may think that all girls gh tl~u~he~~.rerllng, that It Is "all part of growing up," and ~d adolescents earn to enjoy her new body Male children eVI body P8rta do not experience these drastic body changes, 1.e., "are expected to 9~~~ ;"!?8"e before there were none. Fe"!!: and experience pleas 1 Y welcome these newly-formed grow" not always come ·=e sen~tlons In them; however, this d~ 1 8 • ra 11 Y• especially to the female-1<>- 8 Thia .strong dall Id . the OPPollte aex la .!hat rtlflcatlon With the physical form ::rdest thing for non-tranaaex~uallty la all about. It la the uroeS tranaaexua11 to the ua P80ple to understand. It 11 wh81 1CSllY adJuatlng their bOdl 18emlngly unbelievable act of suro tlOf'I· 88 •• • • .. • • to conform to their self-perceP ..... ,,- ln1936 six • ••• • ••••••••••••••• --~ 87' died I months after the d . per1<1.ns, mark8d 'm~1!~burban La Jollaea~ of his wife of 28 years, Or. Eugene ~·sex. first In red Ink Pe'k;'as crossed out at:· On the death certificate, Perkins le' wrltte~ Practice th.ere r ns was known as er examination of the body and 'fema f ecJIOB 8 01 • man In La Jolla during 12 years 0 14 o.ur individual basic sexuality (heterosexuality, homosexuality, bisexuality, asexuality) defines who and what we are and pervades our dally existence. Transsexuals seek sex reassignment so they can relate to other men and women from the basis of their socio-sexual self-perception. They have struggled In the body In which they were born trying to relate to others from a non-existent level. Genetic males who seek sex reasssignment wish to relate to women the way women relate to women, and genetic females who seek sex reassign­ ment wish to relate to men the way men relate to men.

The Issue, once more, Is that our basic sexuality governs our relationships with others. Women react to a naked man m· a different way than they react to a naked woman-this fact will never change-and to say that living In a body which Is not perceived as "yours" Is extremely embarrassing and limiting Is an understate­ ment. The female-to-male transsexual who Is attracted to women does not feel the way a lesbian feels. Gay female sexuality revolves around the contact of two female bodies. The female-to-male transsexual's sexuality revolves around the contact of a man's body and a woman's body-with the transsexual participating In the man's body. It Is helpful to remember that sex reassignment does not change the P9r80n Inside the body. The female-to-male will wake up every morning as the same person he was before. What does change Is his outer appearance to others. What does change Is how other people act towards him. If llberatlonlsts feel It Is wrong that a person needs to change their sexual status In order to live comfortably In ttrls world, they need to point their finger not at the transsexual, but at our society, which sees flt to treat the two sexes so dlfferently. The blame does not He with the Individuals who have became the victims of this disparity. HOW DID IT HAPPEN? The two prlnclpal theories on the possible origin of transsexualism revolve around either a blologlcal, Inborn cause (genetic and/or endocrine) not necessarily Inherited, or with purely psychological causes. The process of achieving a complete gender Identity Is a developmental progression, beginning with genetic foundations and ending with social learning. A specific turn of events at any one stage of the progression may not directly cause a certain twist In the flnal Identity but any sway In the structure may make each followlng developmental level more vulnerable to a s~:f:c direction. But, as research continues, even those In the psyc a r0 ~ Professions are more and more convinced that the cause tranasexuallam la genetic.

15 r ==

ED\TOR)AL STAFF Albany Co\lege Yearbook, 1911 of photo Lucll\e Hart appears \n upper right

p.1 as or- . t age 27, ·cal no Born In '\892, Alberta Lucllle Hart began living permanently· a toblograP"' radl Hart In Portland, Or., and wrote The Undaunted, a semi-au ssed x-raY •8,sor published In '\936; These Mysterious Rays l1943) which dlscubOokS with and ultravlolet therapy; In the Lives of Men l1937) and othef male homosexual themes.

16 POSSIBLE BIOLOGICAL CAUSES

Seven variables have been Identified that contribute to the • ·of an lndlvldual: •se~'

1) chromosomal configuration (XX or XV)

2) gonads (ovaries or testes)

3) Internal reproductive structures (uterus or prostate, etc.)

4) external genitalia (penis/scrotum or cfltorls/labfa)

5) hormonal secretion (predominantly male androgens or female estrogens)

6) sex assigned at birth

7) psychologlc sex or gender Identity

Numerous genetic studies have been performed In a search for a l>OSalble link with transsexualism. However, genetics Is still a very Young science and, therefore, an absence of positive findings does not deny their possible existence. While we are able to count chromosomes at this stage of scientific advancement, we know little about the genes or the genetic code contained In each one of those chromosomes.

Of considerable significance for understanding sexual development Is that the basic blologlc disposition of mammalian· embryos Is female. No gonads and no sex hormones are required for a fetus to develop In a female direction. For maleness to emerge, androgenic or male hormones must act at critical developmental periods. Children with Turner's Syndrome generally have only one sex chromosome (X), develop neither functional ovaries or testes, and appear to be female at birth. Children with testicular feminization are chromosomally male (XY1, have testes that secrete normal amounts of testosterone, but their body cells are unable to utlllze It. At birth they appear to be normal females, and therefore are raised as girls and later show appropriately feminine behavior. The absence of menstruation (there Is no uterus), or removal of a ''mass'' found to be a testis, frequently leads to the diagnosis that these girls are chromosomal and gonadal males. •••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• In 1901 Charles Winslow Hall of Boston died of consumption at age 39 aboard an IMO.ft... k led ed that after brooding for some time over --.n llner. His ltallan wife ac now g II H' II had llved the previous two years the disadvantages.of being a woman, caro ne a • Charles, and had won several rifle-shooting contests.

17 In 1979 the New Engla~d Journal of Medicine reported the reselrch of i:toctors at the Cornell University Medical College, who studled 38 cases of men who were born and raised as apparently normal glr 1s 1n the Dominican Republic. The phenomenon occurred bee8U88 .a defect In the unborn child caused It to appear more llke a glrl at birth than a boy. Increased male hormone levels at puberty caused these lndlvlduals to develop muscular bullds and deeper voices. A phallusf developed and the testicles descended Into a scrotum formed o folds In the skin. This study of pseudohermaphrodltes-people who are genetically male but have female-like external featuresed­ lndlcated that most of the lndlvlduals, raised as glrls, form male gender Identities after puberty.

One blologlcal theory relating to transsexualism Is that there may be 8 gene In the sex chromosomes which has to do with the Identification and feel of maleness or femaleness, and that this gene 1 may become transposed onto the opposite-sex gene " the transsexual.

In December 1979 at the Fourth World Congress of sexology, a report was read suggesting a possible genetic cause of crOSS­ ~nder Identification, Involving the H-Y antigen, a cell surfa: mponent present In all male tissues. Normal men are H-Y antlg n positive, normal women are H-Y antigen negative. e1eveV m~~e-to-female transsexuals were examined· eight were H· n an yrn negative, one a weak positive and. two H-Y antlg~e 1 1n addition, eleven female-t~male transsexuals :!mr:... 1 w:,,d one H-Y a'rit~:ewere H-Yantlgen positive, one a weak poslt~fspute, such finding n negative. Though the study la under 8 cannot be totally Ignored. Benjamin states th ce that 40% of his at It may have an endocrine algnlflcan 8 of sexual und~~:t°ifemale transsexual patients had distinct sl~~h a condition, the ~~u~fment (hypogonadlsm) and that, In ~fault. ary as well as the gonads may be 8 Research at the o painted to neural or ce~ regon Regional Primate Research Center and brain centers ar:~~~neur~I P<>Ssiblllties. The neural struct::S theY found, and their gen~f9 vlng organs for hormonal lnfluen neS roaY affect them. Evlden c quality can decide how these hormo have a broad role In the ': Indicated that the gonadal hormones h their organization of neura?:~~~~lon of sex behavior throug

Recent brain resea~ ed into 8 the brain structure ch has shown that tiny electrodes Insert 0nlY fra~tlon of a mllllme~uld cause sexual responses by m~vlng stitLJt8 Pomts out that a porrer. A report from the Brain Research ":OLls, IS 18 ion of the brain' known as the hypothala Inherently feminine and wlll remain so unless a testicular: tissue aecretlng testosterone organizes this portion of the brain along masculine lines. Since the hypothalamus has much to do with the regulatf~n of the pituitary function, secondary endocrine anomalies could well occur.

The manner In which gonadal hormones, brain anatomy and sexual behavior are Interrelated defies precise description. OVerlald with the Rrofound Influences of a lifetime of Interpersonal experiences anh d mediated by a sophisticated central nervous system network, t e task of orderly arrangement of all Influences la Insurmountable. Each new study and finding merely enlarges the complexlty. It would be just as hazardous to accept a purely neuroanatomlc or neuroendocrlne basis of human sexual behavior aa It would be to disregard biological findings as Irrelevant In comparison to psychoanalytic or learning theories. POSSIBLE PSYCHOLOGICAL CAUSES An lndlvldual'a paychoaexuaJ gender Identity la made up of a complex variable collection of Inner mental traits and tendencies, some subtle and others emphatic. We have taken for granted that mates will simply grow up to be masculine (whatever that might mean In our particular culture/time) and that females will grow up to be feminine (and In our quickly changing times, no one Is really sure what that means anymore). Usually, one's personality (with Its many qualltles and characteristics) resolves Into a harmony thtlt Jives with our present definitions of what a person with their kind of body should do or be. Not so for tranaaexuala. Their bodies say one thing to the world-their feelings and natural behavlcn aay something elae. Gender apeclallata agree that a person's sexuality la decided In a Child's first five years before the child ts capable of making 8 COn&cloua choice In the matter. By that time, a child's sexual Identity haa been determined ae to whether he or she will be hom088x':~ heterosexual, bisexual, transsexual, etc. If we truly 8CC8Pt tual rea111y, It la hard to "blame" anyone for the1 r eex Identity or orientation. ------·------d rked 81 a trapper and hunter Lucy Ann ·Lobdell (1829-91) wore men '1 clothes an wo husband to a young woman. •nd, under the name Joseph Lobdell, llved 3 years 88 he "Certificate of Insanity" ~obdell died In an Insane asylum In wmar3., Nm~ra: and Insists on wearing male .,•,tlng, ''She Is uncontrollable, Indecent an h!'lth after the death of her husband. 1re.•• Lobdell'a wife was reported In poor · Sh says ahe has the power A doctor noted that Lobdell had "an enlarged ct,ltorlsotrud:S Its head - her own to erect this organ In the um• way .• turt 8 Pt'1 • comparison." 1f The assesament of a patient's gender Identity takes Into account childhood behavior and fantasies, adult body Imagery, masturbatory fantasies., and sexual and social relations. Did ·the patient experience conflict over gender behavior as a child? Have there been life periods In which the patient was adequately able to relat~ as their genetic gender? Can sexual arousal accompany Imagery 0 the self with original gen.etic genitalia? Has crossdresslng be8'1 sexually exciting? Does the patient consider herself a man or ~ woman when dressed In men's or women's clothes? To what· exten f does the patient, by physical behavior, convey an impr8881on ° femininity I masculinity?

PSYCHOLOGICAL TREATMENT Psychotherapy with the aim of ••curing'' the properly dlagn~ transsexual so that she accepts her genetic sex Is generally acceP~ to be a useless undertaking. A person might learn to llve with t 18 dichotomy of mind against body, but the dichotomy never goes away· There Is no cure, and gender specialists admit there Is no case on record of a total reversal of symptoms. The mind of the tran~ sexual cannot be changed. A child, before the age of five, can~f make a conscious choice of sexual or gender orientation, and sur y when an adult cannot be held responsible for that orientation. Coercion, whether by threats, physical force, withdrawal of loved manipulation, or such "therapies" as electro-shock ~ · aversion therapy, cannot help tranaaexuals resolve the confllct9 r, their lives. They must decide whether to Uve with ...!..'! contradictory body or to adjust It to agree with their no-- ...

Psychological help by th need In the gender Identity field ha eraplst or counselor exper1 e ssexuals who have • owever, can be of great value to tran dailY 1 lives. Man~x~~s~~~~dneas, rejection or ridicule In th~:r self· consciousness 0 rough feelings of inadequacy, gu 'ik to someone who ors parf'ola. Merely the opportunity to :a 1ts therapeutic value. no shacked about their problem

Psychiatric mana rnent consists of e 1 gement of· persons seeking sex reassign sel< change cr~~noration and understanding of the motivation 1~1cal and surgical pr~:llstlc view of the limits of avallabl~f;icu1tlel encountered In the :Ci 8~PPorting the patient In the dd r role, management of a transition Into a new gen 8 tent's family resulting C 1 ~~ emotional difficultlea of the P8:ina a realistic anticipation of e ieclslon for sex change, pro7t~r se>' reassignment, and twl at the future may hold s strnef1l period. 8881 a ng In the post-operative ad 1u Charley Wiison (born Catherine Coombes In England, 1834) lived and worked as man for over 40 years without his true sex being discovered. For 7 years 8~ harley lived with his niece, the couple passing as husband and wife until the girl ed. In 1897 (at age 63), Charley turned himself Into a poorhouse, ~here1 his sex was disclosed and he was given a blue-print dress and red shawl. If I had money," Charley told a visitor, "I would get out of here In men's clothes and no one would detect me.'•

21 •'There are only about four or five researchers In gender Identity, and there's so much they're missing In understanding this,'' said a well-known female-to-male. ••If a person like myself s~~denly h~ depression, It Is Immediately related to being a transsexual. A person confined to a wheelchair Is stereotyped In the same way., he said. "Nobody Is helping (people going through gender problems] to relate to the subtleties of llfe," he said. "It la one of those areas, I guess, where If you've been through It, you know a hell of a lot more about It." It Is very Important for the prospective female-to-male transsexual to seek out and counsel with female-ta­ males who have already made the change • •••••••••••• Some female-to-male crossdressers hope to pass In public as men. She might learn to walk without moving her hips, bind her breasts so they don't show or move, and attempt to lower her voice. tone. Whlle the male-to-female has the benefit of cosmetics to change and disguise his face, the female-to-male must avoid make-up altogether and go out cold turkey. Here are a few suggestions for the woman trying to pass as a man (of equal Interest to the pre-operative female-to-male tranaaexual who has yet to begin hormone therapy).

HOW TO LOOK 30 WHEN YOU ARE 30 The biggest problem when going female-to-male Is that a 30-year· old female, when crossdressed as a man can end up looking llke 8 14-year-old ·boy. What can the femal:,_to-male crossdresser do to look older?

~LOTH/NG Says John T. Molloy In Dress for success: thore of the major problems with small men who are very youngd~~ a peop 1e still are tempted to address them as •Hey, kl ; , To overcome this, they should only wear super-adult garments. ~~l~~Y • who did extensive research on the Impressions m~de bY 0 ng, offers these suggestions to the small young man who ::r~;. ~~~:=: if88P8Cted authoritative figure In the busl~= h · s rt for the small man Is the solid white; the d s oes are traditional wingtips; the best coats are heavy an 8 ~~~~~lo~~d ~~~Y~~mdel hair. They should only wear rich-look:R H ' ou 1 be neat to the point of being prec 18 • o:v~~~Y;s: :~r~~~ obenly ties that are very expensive-• •ties f~~~ sport ti ( 0 h available to a boy " Stay away polk/do~ sue a paisley) and wear only serious ties (Ivy League,

22 "Color contrast Is very important," he continues, "easily attainable with a dark suit, white shirt and dark tie. Make sure the contrast is equally pronounced In sport clothes, particularly between any two items worn above the belt. If a golf jacket and a golf shirt are both in the same shade range, they will make the small man look even smaller." Colors of business suits that tested well tor small men: medium blue solid, dark blue pinstripe, and medium gray pinstripe. Molloy suggests wearing atte_ntion-getting devices, the best being a unique watch that is Immediately. identifiable as quite expensive. Glasses frames should be fairly heavy to add significance to the face and very young men who must establish their authority may find ·that picking up their hair color in the color of their frames is effective. While Molloy has been criticized for being too extremely ultra­ conservative throughout his book, do consider his gist when putting yourself together.

FACE Use a small comb to brush the hairs of the eyebrows up and out toward the side of the face to make them appear fuller. Take a razor to the peach fuzz on your cheeks and chin. It may be hair, but men do not have that soft down on their faces ... only women do. So shave it. It'll look like you just got a really close shave, plus your skin will feel somewhat rougher. If you look extremely young (and If the thought of make-up doesn't make you sick), try mascara to darken your eyebrows, but be meticulous. You may want to experiment applying medium-brown shadow under your eyes, blending it In well, to simulate dark circles under the eye, suggesting age. Use a brown coloring pencil to follow your natural smile lines from the corner of the nose to the mouth and the ••crow's feet" around the eyes. Again, blend well to assure believability. Some controversial methods: Don't try THAT hard to cure your acne. That pimply, pitted look is very masculine. And too much sun causes the skin to age faster, forms wrinkles, creates a leathery look ... exactly what you want.

HAIR Use a long, very sharp scissors to cut sideburns. While they will be short, they can be very exacting and realistic (see illustration). Some feel that a short haircut with each hair in place is the ideal, but some female-to-males can wear the "tousled" look well. Just remember that fine line between a •'cute'' man and a "cute" boy.

23 BODY LANGUAGE There's a lot to say for weightlifting. One look at competitors In women's bodybuilding will assure you that women can be quite muscular, despite their extra layer of fat. Though you may be small, you'll confidently roll up your sleeves to display sharp definition In your arms. Dainty hands are a problem for some. Pumping Iron wlll cause the blood veins on the back of the hands to enlarge, and wlll push the knuckle bones apart as the muscles grow. These changes-veins and knuckles-will make your hands look more masculine and wlll remain even after you stop lifting weights. Gentlemen's Quarterly suggests showing more cuff beneath the suit jacket to make the hands appear larger. And keep your fingernails short. Above all, walk talll Head up-Shoulders back-Stomach In. While the temptation Is strong to slouch the shoulders forward to minimize the breasts, get an effective binder Instead. Your shoulders will appear broader when thrown back, and walking tall wlll project a serious responsible demeanor and that all­ important air of self-confidence. Learn to move slower and look 'm straight In the eye. It is a well-known fact that if you EXPECT to be well received, you will be. If you act as though something Is wrong, others wlll look to find out what It is. If you act as though you have a perfect right, even the most aggressive male will hesitate to confront you . Blasting Into and dashing out of the men's room WILL cause alarm among the other guys. You'll blend In better by ••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Deborah Sampson (1760-1827) ~ Plymouth, Mass., served 1 years as Robert Shurtlleff. a con­ tinental soldler In the Amer:ca~ Revolutionary War, and race ~ter an honorable discharge ~aul discovery In a hospital. 1 Revere, In a letter of per~?W8e reference, wrote of her, f the commonly form our Idea 0 ff person whom we hear spoken:,n : whom we have never s ar~ according as their Action; her described. When I hear ed spoken off as a Soldier, I forrine the Idea of a tall, Mascue of female who had a small shar tlon understanding, without educasex ·& one of the meanest of h~ with When I saw and dlscours ed to her, I was agreeably surpr 1s con­ find a small, effeminate an~uca· versable Woman, whose t>etter tlon entitled her to a situation In life." 24 MENSWEAR CONVERSION CHART

WOMEN'S MENSWEAR SIZES SIZES• PANTS•• sHtRts• SWEATERS JACKETS" 3/4 27 BOYS'12 BOYS'12 BOYS'12 5/8 28 BOYS'14 BOYS'14 BOYS'14 BOYS'16 BOYS'11 7/8 29 M•N'SXS 80"''11

BOYS'11 BOY8'18 BOYS'11 1110 30 MEN'SS NECK14-14% MEN'SS IEN'I•

BOYS'20 BOYS'20 80YS'21 11/12 31 MEN'SS NECK 14-14Va llEN'SS MEN'S 31,17 MEN'Sll 13/14 32 MEN'SM NECK 14Va-15 •N'ISUI MEN'Sll 15118 33 MEN'Sll NECK14%-15 MDrS•.• MEN'SL 18 34 IEN'SL NECK1S-15% IEN'840,41 llEN'SL 20 35 llEN'SL llEN'SG NECK 15'1l-11

•odd numbers are juniors; even numbers are misses • . .. The number given is the waist size. Often this can be approximated by measuring your hips at their fullest point and subtracting six inches. For the in-seam length. measure the inside seam of your best-fitting pair of pants. 'To obtain the proper sleeve length, you will need someone else's help. Bending your elbow. measure the distance from the center of the back of your neck to the elbow, then from elbow lo wrist. The total is the appropriate sleeve measurement. "Jackets usually come in short, regular or long lengths. sauntering In, glancing at the mirror, using the stall, washing your hands and sauntering out. This attitude on your part wlll put that unsettling hint of uncertainty Into anyone who might question your status, and while they may decide you're a pretty sorry excuse for a man-hell, at least you are onel Be sure they see there Isn't any doubt In YOUR mind about thatl

CLOTH/NB AND SHOE SIZES In shoes, a wqmen's size 7-1 /2 translates to about a man•a size 8. The following companies sell mall order men's shoes In small sizes: Lawson Hiii Shoe Co., 580 Winter Street, Waltham MA 02154; and Haband Co•• 285 North 9th Street, Paterson NJ 07530.

25 11 d 1' BREAST BINDING Although m~t advice to the fetnale-to- male on this subject Involves ace bandages o_r­ worse!--adhesive tape, there are much easier and more comfortable methods to flatten your chest. Basically you want to do the opposite of what Frederick's of Hollywood's cleavage bras do-instead of pushing the breasts up and together, you want to push them down and apart.

If you are small busted, one method is to simply buy a wide elastic band sold to control •'midriff bulge'' (can be obtained through the mail from Magic Mold Inc., 210 Hanse Avenue, Freeport NY 11520). Except, instead of wearing it around your waist, pull it up around the breasts, tuck­ ing them under your arms as much as possible. Wear an undershirt or a dark shirt over the binder so it is not visible through your clothes.

If large busted, you might try this method: Use a gJrl'd "traine~ bra" to hold the breasts up to the level where a man's pectora muscles would bulge, higher than the normal bustllne. Separate th~ cups of the bra by taking apart the material between the cups an inserting a strip of cloth. This holds the breasts away from the frdont of the chest, leaving the breastbone flat. Over this, wear a span ex elastic undershirt (sold by many men's stores for potbelly control). Then wear a T-shirt and your shirt. The result Is very convincing and still breathe-able.

Sorry to say, no binder that does its Job Is really comfortable. Whatever's more Important.

THE CROTCH Especially when wearing close-fitting trous~,rs (or If you anticipate getting close to someone who "doesn't know ), you may want to use some padding. Wearing an athletic supporte~ stuffed with two socks (dress socks, 1hat is ... be realistic!) might d the trick, but often when walking or during long periods of wear, th 8 su~porter tends to shift around too much. An athletic cup supporteri which has a pocket In front that snaps closed passes the wear tes much better· Stuff the pocket with the socks. Another Idea Is to pin

------:f hlle engaged to a------woman, Ellie Green waa arrested In 1899 for check forgery---- ~d acovered to be a woman at the penitentiary to which he was senten 1 m edh to be Impersonating her twin brother tod ~~;::a;::r,8;!h~!C:: ~83"thcaltalmh1 sa~ean~w h 8tt 0 ' e eraelf waa Innocent However she wou 1 no In t rouer bl e. ~~ey to l88k to aet aside the court's sentence"' aa It ••would Involve others 26 the rolled-up socks to the Inside crotch of your underw•r. This way there are no supporter straps and band to discover; It Is a lot more comfortable; doesn't require a major reorganization whenever you use the restroom; and you could remove your trousers, showing an appropriate lump In your underwear (make sure the pins don't show).

THE MEN'S ROOM Some publlcatlons urge female-to-males against the use of publlc restrooms. This Is not always possible, especially for the female-to-male transsexual living full-time as a man. There should be no problems using the men's room-Just use the stall. Many men find urinals difficult to use, so they use the stall .ar:id even ..sit to urinate. (A male Olympic gold m~al_ boxer, who couldn't produce a urine sample, admitted he'd never been able to go 11whlle someone's watching me. I can never stand at those long urinals you get In gents' bogs, with all the other blokes having a quick squint.") Most stalls In men's rooms have doors. If not, you just need to be cautious about 11who's looklng where" and be lightning quick pulling your pants up or down. If there are too many eyes, you may need to fake constipation until the place clears out a bit before you get up. In the sitting position, urine hitting the water sounds the same coming from a male or a female. Contlriually flushing the toilet while urinating will surely attract more attention than simply using the stall, the toilet paper, flushing and leaving. Blow your nose In the toilet paper If you're paranoid that taking It sounds suspicious.

If you are passing as a man on the street, It would be highly unlikely that another man wlll confront you concerning your urination habits. (If someone actually has the nerve to ask why you always use the stall, tell them, 11Gee, I dunno. I guess I really AM full of ltl HAHA" If Joe asks why he never sees you at the urinal, try, 11 1didn't know you were looking for me there, Joel" You might get a bloody nose-proof that Joe Is convinced you're a man.) However, If you are having dlfflculty passing, It Is best to use private as opposed to public facllltles. For starters, try using the men's room In an airport, or somewhere else where everyone Is In too much of a hurry to pay a lot of attention to you . •••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

In Phoenix 1808, 33-year-old Nlcholas de Raylan's death by tuberculosls ravealeCI he was a female who llved his llfe as a man, married women twice, fought In the Spanish-American War, and worked as secretary to the Ru11lan Consul In Chicago. De Raylan's first wife had divorced . him after a 10-year marriage for Infidelity and misconduct with chorus glrls. His second wife, a member of the chorus, wept on learning of his death, declarlng that talk of his being a woman was "nonsense." In his wlll, De Raylan made careful arrangements to prevent detection of sex after death, but these were frustrated as he died In a hospital. He ·wore an elaborately-constructed Imitation penis and testicles made- of Clhamol1 skin and stuffed with down, suspended by a band around the waist.

27 nsul wsJ Jack Bee Garland, daughter of san Francisco's first Mexican co men'I detained by police In Stockton, Calif., In 1897 for " masquerading 1 ~ Naom clothes," and within a month waa made an honorary member of Stockton 9a man Bachelors Club. Jack spent the last 40 years of life passing as Genera In 1936, he died after spending two days In San Francisco female Hospital without doctors realizing that their patient was a "Many have thought It strange that I do not care to mingle with wome~ ofl~~r~~ age and seem partial to men's company. Well, Is It not natural that 1s ~~ few < the companionship of men? 1 am never happy nor contented unless w 1 d8 wome 'the boys.' I like to sit and listen to the conversations of cultured men. coul with or see men aa 1 have, they would love them all. Why? Because they are, ther a1 another, open and frank. They know each other's llttle secrets and altoo: flcklE congenial. The young women whom 1 have met are too vain an think too much, as It were, about looks."

28 SEX REASSIGNMENT Deciding to change your life and your body to that of a man will be the most Important decision you will ever make. Don't take the matter lightly. The female-to-male transsexual ha8 a more difficult decision to make than the male-to-female. The status of the female-to-male sex reassignment surgery Is such that the female-to-male Is looking toward the prospect of building and spending his life as a man with little hope of being a physically complete male, I.e., with little hope of ever possessing functional male genitalia. But this Is the decision, and the pros and cons must be weighed. Is It possible for you to function from day to day as a "masculine" femaie? Is your sex life .. satisfactory as It Is, compared to what It might be as a man without a penis? or as a man WITH a vagina? These are questions that only you can answer. However, In considering these questions, remember that there are numerous genetic males with deformed genitals, or who have lost their sex organs through accident or war, who continue to function as men without questions of their gender. Many people must face life physlcallv. handicapped-the female-to-male Is one of them. HORMONE THERAPY Your next step la to find an endocrinologist who· wlll work with you. When you find one, It Is up to you to work with him or her. ·

Male hormones (testosterone cyplonate) are administered by ln~ra­ muscular Injection. Oral administration of testosttrone has been advised against, because the hormone Is Inactivated In the liver after absorption from the small Intestine to the portal vessels. Some patients contracted jaundice due to damage of the liver. The average dosage Is 200 mg/cc every two weeks. As of this writing, a vial of 10 shots plus 12 syringes/needles costs about $60. A doctor will also charge you If he gives you the shot. Have someone teach you to give yourself the shots to save $$.

To get a general Idea of what hormones wlll do to you, look at the male members of your family-father. and brothers. Whatever their hormones have done to them, testosterone could do to you. You carry the same genes. •••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• Peter otratford died of tuberCUI01l1 In oakland, ca., In 1929. Hie belonglng1 founaed "Q De t y Morton a woman who lmmlgrat In a hotel room revealed him to be r~ eth Rowla~d 8 screenwriter In 1925. from New Zealand In 1904 and marrlfedh iuaband'a tr~e sex untll a f~w monthl Ma. Rowland said ahe did not know o er before hie death. No one ~lalmed Stratford's bOdY. I j 29 Side effects of testosterone (not necesaarlly In order of appearance each person reacts differently): You know you are receiving an adequate dose of testosterone Wh'R the menstrual flow stops. The androgen-Induced suppr~~on ff 'tu; ovaries results In diminished or completely suppresaed ~8!!'~!t estradlol and progesterone. OVulatlon ceases and you ~"· become pregnant.

The vocal cords thicken, the voice sounds hoarse and crack& like ~ adolescent boy's, and eventually deepens to a man 8•

Acne may develop as the hormone lncreasas sabaCOOUB gland activity. Wash often, use a benzoyl peroxide acne lotion. The actual texture of the skin will roughen and thicken in time. If acne 18 uncontrollable, go to a dermatologist, who may prescribe antibiotics (tetracycline), Just as he would prescribe for any adolescent bOY· This should clear you up.

You'll experience an Increase In energy (something like a caffeine rush), so watch what you eat Thia la the time to concentrate on nutrition and a healthy diet. oO your body right, now that It's doing you right. Eventually that extra layer of female fat will melt aw~Y (yes, even around your hips and thighs I), the muscles will actua ~ restructure and change In firmness, shaping your body to more ma 1 proportions. You may experience muscle cramps, but this wlll on 1Y be a temporary condition.

Testosterone forms a layer of calcium around the bones, 80 you should become about a half-clothlng-alze larger. Flngernalls and toenails grow more rapidly.

The clltorls enlarges and wlll look much like a very tiny penis, Including a ridge around Its head. After a number of years It rnaY elongate to about the size of your thumb (maybe 1-1 /2 Inch•)· Topical application of testosterone and/or a dally zinc supplement may benefit the growth.

Dlre:1rrelated to the growth of the clltorla 11 a sharp increase In ~·-­ sex r ve. You may find It necessary to set aside more time Ot :t~:!c=ivCC::.!ind ~raelf waking several times d~~1n:u= of sexual drive anc1·• any female-to-males welcome t ive' nell· Its accompanying aggreaa

BOdy hair Wiii Increase and arms• pubic area buttoeks abclome become darker ••• on the leg&, t ~ face. Teat0aterone ma n, handa, ahd later on the chll If baldness runs In Your ~,:-? ca"'8 male-patterned baldne:;•tht baldneea aena). er a aide of the family (women car 30 If prone to poor teeth, the chemleal change .In your mucous membranes may have a bad effect, so use a flourlde rinse as an addltlonal precaution. Should you decide to discontinue taking testosterone, the following side effects are not reversible: the voice wlll remain low, the body and facial hair may continue to grow (you wlll need to undergo electrolysls to remove It), and you may be rendered Infertile due to atrophy of the ovaries.

SURGERY Most female-to-male transsexuals are especially Interested In having their breasts removed. A mastectomy Is usually the first, and sometimes the only, surgery many female-to-males undergo. It Is performed many different ways, depending on your surgeon's technique, the size of the breasts, etc. Usually an Incision Is necessary to remove the excess skin and to reduce the size of the areola, thus scarring Is Inevitable. However, with proper care and sufficient time, the scars will fade. Scar tissue is made of collagen which depends on both Vitamin C and calcium for strength. Speed of healing Is directly related to Vitamin C Intake. Medical journals have urged all physicians to recommend large amounts of, Vitamin C before and after surgery. When 4,000 milligrams or more·· pf Vitamin C Is taken dally by such patients, the speed of healing Is augmented. In addition, a Vitamin E supplement of 400 units or more dally wlll speed healing of scars. After surgery, apply the contents of Vitamin E capsules directly on the scar to help fade them.

------Seventy-year-old Murray H. Hall played poker, drank whisky, smoked a big black cigar, and was an Influential member of the Tammany Hall political machine In New York City. Hall had married women twice, his first wife leaving after complalnlng that her husband was too fllrtatlous with other women. Hall once tried to thrash two stalwart policemen and gave them a tussle before they subdued him. His wlll left $40,000 to his adopted daughter, who dldn t will left $40,000 to his adopted daughter, who didn't know her father was a woman until he died of breast cancer In 1901. It was then disclosed that Hall llved as a man for thirty years, voting the Democratic ticket In New York. "Suspect he was a woman?" said Senator Bernard F. Martin. "Never. He dressed llke a man and talked llke a very sensible one. The only thing I ever thought eccentric about him was his clothing. Now that they say he's a woman, I can see through that. You see, he also wore a coat a size or two too large, but of good material. That was to conceal his form. He had a bushy head of black hair, which he wore long and parted on the left side. His face was always smooth, just as If he had just come from the barber'1." 31 Some progressive surgeons now perform the simple mastectomy In their office surgical suites with the patient under local anesthetic. Either wedge resection of large breasts with free nipple grafting or subcutaneous mastectomy with second stage nipple conversion can be done. In other procedures, the patient Is advised to take two weeks off for the surgery. Several days may be spent In the hospital. The rest of the time will be spent convalescing so as not to tear the stitches or stretch the newly-formed scar tissue. Follow doctor's urders, but you may be able to remove the bandaging about a week after surgery and could begin lifting weights after about two weeks (although you are not to lift above your head, as this may open the scars). You may be tempted to bare your chest, but be sure not to expose the scars to sunlight-the sun will darken the tissue and prevent the scars from fading properly. After a certain amount of healing, your doctor will Instruct you to massage the skin on the chest to prevent the Internal scarring from adhering to the muscle wall.

Many female-to-males also undergo a hysterectomy to remove the uterus and ovaries. Some decide against this procedure, fearing IOSS of orgasm, ~s the female sexual response was believed to Include contractions of the uterus. Most who do undergo this surgery report that they continue to experience orgasm.

Grafenberg did note that a woman may be unable to experience orgasm after a hysterectomy 'If the eroto­ genlc zone of the anterior vaginal wall was removed at the time of the operation.' Yet many women who have had hysterectomies report that they continue to experience the 'deep orgasms' accompanied by the pushing-down sensation, even though they no longer have their uterus. One explanation for this may be that the nerves supplying the uterus and the G-spot are st/II Intact, and thus the muscular response In the upper part of the vagina Is not affected.

The existence and location of the G-spot Is extremely lmport'!'nt for surgeons to consider when perform/~g operations. Cutting In the wrong place may depnve certain women of future sexual pleasure. The G-Spot, and Other Recent Discoveries AbOUt Human Sexuality (see Readings) If phalloplasty Is In your future, this removal of the Internal female ~~~~~~can usbudally be done vaginally so as to preserve the Integrity ower a omen for the tube pedlcle construction of the penis. ~~~l~:d~~~~ Incision must be made, It should run vertically In the the top of the pu~~ h''ibll~cus. The transverse Incision paralleling of lower abdominal tlssa r 8 ould be avoided to preserve the Integrity ue. 32 Unfortunately there is still no successful surgical technique for the construction of functional male genitals, I.e., the ability to urinate through the penis, the ablllty to become erect to enable Intercourse nor the ability to ejaculate. Phalloplasty now being performed Involves several separate operations.

One method Involves three surgical procedures, two major and one minor. The first procedure, done under general anesthesia, consists of formation of an inverted tube pedicle running vertically from pubis to approximately 4 cm beneath the umbilicus and Incorporat­ ing the full thickness abdominal skin and soft tissue. By tubing this "raw" side out, a 4-lnch by 8-lnch split thickness skin graft taken from the anterior thigh can be wrapped around the pedlcle for covering, leaving a single vertical seam. This ''suitcase handle'' appearing pedlcle will eventually form the shaft of the penis and the grafted skin will mimic the loose skin of the natural male penis more closely than methods using non-grafted pectlcles. The labia majora Is then converted into a scrotum by splitting each lip along its medial border, connecting the two together In the pubic area, thus forming an Inverted v. The Inner layer is sutured separately from the outer layer across the mldllne so as to form a scrotum. Attachment of the labia across the mldline "'11des" the·clltorls and vaginal lntroidus from view and when completely healed will be available to accept two silicone testicular prostheses. The second Procedure, done under local anesthesia, is simply a "delay" of the abdominal skin between pedlcle and umbilicus that will be used to construct the head of the penis. The incisions are made, undermined Slightly and closed with simple skin sutures. The third procedure Is carried out approximately two weeks later, at which time the Incisions are reopened and complete release of the abdomen is aceomplished. The free ends of the pedlcle are folded toward one another the points trimmed bluntly and sutured together to form a conleal head with central dimpling, slmulatlng the male Penile head. The abdominal donor site Is undermined slightly and CIOSed primarily. The upper baSes of each l~~la are surglf:811Y 0Pen8d In a transverse manner and each labia hollowed out by blunt dissection to accept adult-sized silicone testicular prostheses. Once In place the pockets are sutured and the scrotum with testicles 18 completed, as la the penis.

••••••• ••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• •••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

A 190 G eene of Ettrick, Va., who at 40 ma 2 mec11ca1 Journal cited the case of George r without discovery of Greene's tru~rlect a woman and maintained their relatlons~l~llllam c Howard, a farmer of Cana'8: until his death at age 75; and the case 0d's wife and. two adopted children refu~lagua, N.V., who died at age 50. HoHwar rd's bOdY prompting a coroner's lnq .. vv to r>ermlt an undertaker to prepare owa ' . ueat Which disclosed his female sex. 33 r I HOMOLOGUES IN FEMALE & MALE UROGENITAL ANATOMY

Ad~lt Female Adult Male Ovary••••••••••••••••••••••••••• Testis Vagina (upper) Vagina mascullna Uterus •••••••••••••••••••••••••• Prostatlc utrlcle Falloplan tubes Appendix testis canals and ducts of Gartner Semlnal veslcles Vas deferena Epldldymls Bladder•••••••••••••••••••••••••• Bladder Urethra Prostatlc urethra Vestibule·•••••••••••••••••••••••• Penlle urethra Labia mlnora Urethral tube of penis Labia majora •••• ••••••• •••••••••• Scrotum Clitoris Penis Bartholln's glands · •••••••••••••••• Cowper's glands (vestlbular glands) (bulbourethral glands) Prostate gland (urethral glands) Prostate gland (urethral glands)

NEUTRAL (alxweeka)

Mullerlan duct ' Ductathat drain the embryo's early Wolffian duct __.,,,. kidneys

MALE ~FEMALE

Fallopian Vas tube deferens

Formation of Male and Female Internal Sex Org.ana

34 Formation of Male and Female External Sex Organs

NEUTRAL Genital tubercle :.....:n..-- Genital swelling Genital fold MALE '\,FEMALE

'Giana-penis Glans clitoris Urethral Outer labial fold fold Urethral Inner labial fold Urethral groove (to become vaginal entrance

entrance to vagina

Rectum

Urinary ·-,::~-opening

Junction of scrotal folds

During the first six weeks In the womb, an embryo has no sex dlfferent1at1on-the structures that later form Into male organs are absolutely the same as thoee that become female organs. II the embryo Is to be a boy, testicles develop at forty days alter conceptlon ... 11 they do not, the embryo will develop Into a female. All men have an embryonic vagina and uterus located near their Prostate gland-a permanent testament to our origins as one common sex.

35 Later, sexual functioning can be achieved by Inserting a removable silicone rubber rod (baculum) through the hollow tube in the penis. In some cases the penis may be firm enough for sexual functioning without the need of a stiffening rod. The clitoris, near the base of the penis serves as the cllmactlc organ since the head of the penis Is usualiy without sensation. Hair must be shaved or removed by a depilatory creme from the head of the penis as well as through the shaft. Urination, at this stage, is still through the female urethral opening and requires a sitting position. It has become evident with time that a urinary tract hook-up should not be done as they have not been all that successful. The female urethra, say the surgeons, makes such an angulation as compared to the male urethra that it Is very difficult to avoid breakdown, strictures, or fistula formation. Another method of female-to-male genital surgery consists of the removal of the "hood" of skin over the enlarged clitoris and the free-Ing of the underside, allowing the clitoris to protrude as an extremely small, but aesthetically correct "penis" with sexual sensation, ·but which again cannot be used for Intercourse or urination. Testicular Implants are Inserted Into the labia majora, which are sutured together, leaving a small opening for urination. This method leaves the patient with little or no scarring.

ACCEPTING THE NEW MAN IN THE FAMILY A lot of supportive therapy may be necessary for families of those deliberating over sex reassignment. Sometimes spouses or lovers feel they may have somehow failed the transsexual, but they must understand that the transsexual's atypical gender Identity existed prior to their relatlonshlp and It is very unlikely that they had any Influence on the condition or altered It by any means. Parents of transsexuals may also need professional help In assimilating the change. They may feel responsible or guilty tor their child's behavioral anomaly. They need support, understanding and guidance In dealing with these feelings. Hopefully this booklet will help.

Parents of transsexuals are not completely unprepared for the revelation of their child's transsexuallty. Thinking back, they will trace the pattern, the many clues, from the child's earliest d~ys through their adolescence, when the onset of sexual maturation triggers many dramatic distress signals Parents shared In their 0 child's embarrassments and traumas. They remember their own unhappiness for their child, as It became apparent that their

------··In the mld-1700's, Englishwoman Mary East aHumed the name James HOW and lived 34 years as husband to a childhood glrlfrlend. How was exposed by a black· mailer, who was Imprisoned for a considerable term.

36 . . somehow Inappropriate. Paren~s child's natu~ 1~~c;.'°ei.~.:'ud hid In Isolation, rejected by their :S~~r:'ar~ with disapproval In public. · · this child was under pressure to flt In .aE~~S: i:h~ 1:e7n':c1a1 relationships, perhaps evlenedat homned. • ' h became aware that I lfe revo v arou ~t':~ct'fo~n~~·becomes overwhelming .!1f~ecef. or ptlon. some, Llvlwngh thal~t:,nps:a~~l~l~~ot~~~ · · cc8ed) Hopefully the transsexual0 In your life has J:r:.!:i":'u:~t out Md found the professional help ava!lablef In hi~ quest to adjust to a rewarding life, which Is possible or a who seek It. .

Specific areas of family relationships have been studied as crucial to ·the emergence of sexuality. Ainong them are mother-daughter or father-son separation, marital role division or the relative power within a family of mother and father, parent-child emotional cloae­ nesa, and sibling sequence. A major falling of much research Into Intrafamily relatlonahlpa has been the Inability to demonstrate why ·only ONE child displays tranagenderlsm. If, for example, passive or abaent fathers and dominant overbearing mothers are responsible for producing a certain behavior In a child, why don't ALL their children exhibit that behavior? The fact Is that nearly every longitudinal study of gender atypical children, thought to be "pre- transsexuala,"become transsexual. eventuated with none of the children growing up to

Again, It la Just as futile to "blame" a certain life experience for one's sexual identity as It la to "blame" some unknown genetic error as "the" cause. We can all wonder forever WHAT It was that pointed the homosexual, heterosexual, transvestite or tranaaexual In the direction they ended up going. We'll never know THE answer for everyone-that la, If there IS any one such answer. Once your loved one has taken on a new Identity, your acceptance la moat Important. •• not only In vour heart, but through vour words and actions. Parents, after so many yeara of addreaa1ng their child by the name they chose for them and the appropriate pronoun (''•he'• or "her"), will find It no easy task to suddenly change all that. It will be very hard to readjust Joan to John, Margaret to Mark. Pr0bab1y In Your mind, Mark "will always be your llttle Margaret." It wm not come naturally to can her "him," to say "he" ln1teac1 of "aha." It 111111 require a conac1oua r&arranglng of vour thoughts and a studied a111arenesa when You •P98k. Some find It easier to avoid pronouns Whenever•·r~1a la hla PG&alble,car.'' I.e., "Thia la Mark's car" Instead Of

I 1.J Probably the best motivation ls to know that your effort in the manner of addressing your loved one will mean a lot to them. It will take you a while to become used to his new name, but let him know that you are thinking of "him" .•• not the "her" from whom he has freed himself. Let the new man in your family know that "he" Is the one m<>st Important to you. Remember that this rearranging and readjustment Is most keenly felt by him. As his Identity solidifies Into the reality of everyday llf!, he will understandably cringe when you address him by a woman st name, or as "she" or "her," thereby Ignoring the mos Important thing In his life. Making the decision to seek a better life Is the major step In the process of sex reassignment. Most never look back after having finally made that decision. The true transsexual will continue t~ pursue the total change as It becomes apparent that their ••new sex really does feel right. Many facing this major life change face the additional trauma of rejection from ''friends'' and family, who mistakenly hope their .disapproval will somehow erase the problem and make everything as It "should" be, instead of what It .is. All parents must face the .. Imperfections" and llmltatlons of their children. Fortunately, the candidate for sex reassignment has found a way to address this life Impasse. "I love my new sonl" said one parent of a female-to-male. ••1 always used to be uneasy around my daughter-she was so strange-and often I was embarrassed to be seen with •her.' But now I have a happy· self-confident son who makes me proud. I am relieved." Let your loved one know that he will be able to pursue a happier life, fortified by your support and love. .

YOUR SEX LIFE-THOUGHTS TO CONSIDER A potential sex partner, whether female or male, Is Interested In sexual stimulation and satisfaction. Your particular status m•Y demand that you be more Inventive In order to satisfy your partner, keeping her/his wants and needs uppermost In your mind. You will be a good lover If you are responsive to your partner's signals and find ways to meet her/his desires. If your partner Is being satisfied through one means or another, your body parts oftentimes will not be an issue. (Many female-to-males successfully use strap-on dlldOS to engage in Intercourse.) There are countless women who will gladly lay .back and surrender themselves passively to be ravaged bY you. Or you may t>, one of those fortunates who finds a partner who cares enough to seek out and fulfill your needs and desires • ...... ~. ••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• ········ ~~a ~0!~~· who llved aa Frank Blunt for 15-yeans, was sentenced In Fond du LaC· 0 In t~il for e1J;~ ~! !~:! 1 ~~ ~~75 In 1894. Blunt's wife, Gertrude Field, who r,8~ hour" and vowed to car1 'th 8 upon the neck of the prisoner and wept for ha ry e case to the Supreme Court. 38 Marie White and Dorothy Klenowakl two women who married Ralph Kerwlnleo

Cora Anderson 81 Ralph Kerwlnleo

13In Year;1914 8 Jiited glrlfrlend exposed Ralph Kerwlnleo, who had llved as a man but was In Cleveland and Miiwaukee. After a hearing, Cora Anderson was set free, for wantfommanded to wear women's clothes. Wrote Anderson, " Do you blame me blame mng to be a man - free to live llfe as a man In a man-made world? Do you e for hating to again resume a woman 's clothes and just belong?" 39 Whlle the vast majority of female-to-male transsexuals seek females as sexual partners, there are female-to-males who are Interested In men and who find a place In the gay men's world.

During the transition from female-to-male, It Is Important to be all body-aware. In deciding to accept the challenge of llfe as a physical­ ly handicapped man, the female-to-male must learn to accept the fact that he cannot help having been born with a female sexual response and accompanying apparatus. Some female-to-males reject stlmulatlon of the clltorls or vagina; yet, he should remember that all parts of his body are sensual areas, that the vagina contains the erectile tissue found In the male penis, and that he has been born with a handicap. It makes sense to keep In mind that males differ anatomically from females, Internally, only In the absence of the uterus and related reproductive organs. Their basic Innervation and musculature Is Identical to that of the female, with obvious differences ·1n the external organs. Every gland and organ In the male has Its counterpart In the female, and vice versa. The Increased sex drive ·spurred on by testosterone may torment someone who has backed himself lntoJbody-hatlng corner. Learn to relax and appreciate -every portion of ybur body as a potential erogenous zone. Be open to various sexual practices, learn to adapt them to your special circumstances. You CAN satisfy your partner· AND satisfy yourself. Society Is becoming more attuned to the sexual needs of physJcally handicapped persons. If possible, arrange to attend a sexuality workshop for the physically handi­ capped, or study up on the subject yourself. It wlll make you feel a lot better about yourself AND a lot more optimistic about your future In the sexual arena. Acceptance of what can and cannot be In this respect Is key.

Here are some considerations when relating to women: Perhaps you might start by saying you're Impotent to get her ready for a ••sexual dysfunction'' and see how she reacts. Take her to see Yentl or one of the other female-to-male films and have a long talk about the movie afterwards. It doesn't do any good to call the subject anything but what It ls-sex change. Too many people know at least a little about the subject. Remember that you've been deallng with the Issue all of your llfe. It wlll take more than a few days for her to resolve It In her mind. She'll go through a lot of changes, too. It may help If she read this booklet, or met another transsexual. Don't expect to hide your ------·· At age 15, Sarah Edmonds Seelye (1841·98) began to pass as Franklin Th~mpson, selling Bibles, and .. came near marrying a pretty llttle girl." After passing for 5 years, Thompson Joined the Union Army as a male nurse and spy • .. , was 80 conscious of being led, 80 certain of my own self.respect that I never viewed It from a conventional standpoint. And then 1 waa 'so bu1y .• •·"

40 ast frcim your lover-you'll live with t heand fear how that can she' she II come meet across your ~omeone you knew or an ol~ ~~·It more clinical: for example, famlly? But don't dwell ~n . .. not a "woman." Don't use your refer to when you were a femal~bout the past. Keep the picture vagueformer andname ••sterile'' In conversation: (wlthou d etails to create a real picture In her mind).

Another fact to consider: There are ~S:I t whatof attractive you know desirable about menthe who are A-1 lousy selfish lovers. to our advantage and you Wiii female anatomy and sexual response n~sual to discover that a man be a far better lover for hryter h:t ~s :!,0to~fer In actuality has nothing. who seems8 to1 have eve ~In other men. Especially look for ~ake: 1= ·~'::11~~:?~alltl~ In them and evaluate yourself In You may discover that, when It comes right down to It, ~~:fi:On.YOU have more "balls"than a lot of men I

CONTACTS I REFERRALS The lack of a crossgender Peer group is a gaping reality for most female-to-males. While all transvestites/transsexuals are a hidden minority, the female-to-males are even more hidden Within that minority. There may be no one with whom to discuss the subJect. Female-to-males may seek support from the general male-to-female transvestite/transsexual community and, While the female-to-male and the male-to-female experience many slmllarltles In their transitions, In many Instances trying to discuss female-to-male questions With the male-to-female may result In the female-ta­ male's feeling even more Isolated and alone. The male-to-female Is neceaaaruy Preoccupied With the very notions from Which the femate-to-male hopes to escape and It may be extremely hard for the male-to-female to empathize with someone who embraces the totnaacuune. accentuate The the meshing polarities. of the two opposites sometimes only serves ••••••••• •••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

In 1903 H G athletic harri;, orman, employee of the New York Central Railway, "a robust hoapitai ln~v fy-~ullt man-cook of about 40," was discovered to be a female in ~ "at least ta u t~ o after m?!e than 20 Years of i>assing. Gorman claimed to know comPan --an ° er women who Passed as men and worked in the same rauwa and "m!de~:::i':nas rorters, train agents, SWltchmen, etc. They Often met togethe~ one claaa of hu~e vft8 n~t a little m~~ry ove_r the success of their transference from Peer support Qroup~n Y o another, Possibly forming the first female-to-male

41 The major task of the female-to-male is to (all by himself) open~y define his innermost feelings, find a place for those feelings In his life, and map a course of implementation. It is no wonder the female-to-male (in comparison to his male-to-female counterpart) is said to be of a more stable and logical demeanor- he must be an especially strong person to forge his way along seemingly virgin ground. However, there are female-to-males (in stages from transvestic to post-operative) who are interested in extending support to one another and exchanging information. The following is a list of female-to-male contact and referral groups:

Mario Martino, Ph .D., The Labyrinth Foundation, Yonkers NY (914) 969-7014

Steve Dain, P.O. Box 684, Union City CA 94587 (415) 489-1531 Consultations through correspondence, lectures, personal appoint­ ments, group discussions.

Jude Patton, Gender Dysphoria Program, 2006 N. Broadway, Suite 102, Santa Ana CA 92706 (714) 558-1012 or (714) 836-1803

J2CP Information Services, P.O. Box 184, San Juan Capistrano CA 92693-0184 (714) 496-5227 Package for $25

Metamorphosis, P.O. Box 5963, Station A, Toronto, Ontario, Canada M5W 1 P4 Publishes a monthly newsletter for female-to-males.

Under Construction, P.O. Box 545, Alhambra CA 91801 . Weekly meetings for female-to-males; publisher of The Los Angeles Transsexual Yellow Pages, $10 ppd . •••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Mrs. Lllllan Arkel-Smith lived six years as Colonel Sir V ictor Barker, serving as an officer in the British Army and marrying a woman, and was sentenced to 9 months in London 1929 for entering a false statement in the marriage register . Several years earlier the same co urt had acquitted Colonel Barker of carrying a revolver without a license.

42 READINGS

11 Passlng Women 1782-1920," Gay American History, A Docu­ mentary by Jonathan Katz. New York: Avon Books, 1976 pages 317-422. ' Dreaslng Up: Transvestism and Drag, The History of an Ob18111on, bY Peter Ackroyd. New York: Simon & Shuster, 1979. ~ademolaelle de Maupin, by Theophlle Gauthier. New York: rosset & Dunlap, 1930. Emergence: A Transsexual Autobiography, by Marlo Martino, with harrlett. New York: Crown PubllsheFs, 19n. · · The Awful Beacon ••• by One Who'ln Disguise Served Three Years as ~Marine on Board the Frigate Constitution, by Lucy Brewer West. oston: Printed for N. Coverly, Jr., 1816. :arratlve of Lucy Ann Lobdell, the Female Hunter of Delaware and Pulllvan Counties, New York, by Lucy Ann Lobdell. New York: ubllshed by the authoress, 1855. :he Rode With the Generals, by Sylvia G. L. Dunnett, on the llfe of arah Emma Evelyn Edmonds (Franklin Thompson]. New York: Nelson, 1960. Dr. Mary Walker: The Llffle LldY In Pants, by Charles McCool Snyder. New York: Vantage, 1962. ''Women as Men,, In Famous imposters, by Bram Stoker. New York: Sturgis &Walton, 1910. The Female Review: Life of l)ebOrah Sampson, by Herman Mann, 1797. Reprinted by New York: Arno Press, 1972. !"' Well of Loneliness, by Radclyffe Hall. Copyright 1928 by the Uthoress. New York: Doubleday. Patience and Sarah by Isabel Miiier. Copyright t969 bY the authoress. New York; McGraw Hiii. ~~eAGK·Spot, and Other Recent 01scoveprles abON'~~:r=~ :if~f~~'. · . ·Ladas, B. Whipple, and J. D. erry. ~!: Male: A Comprehensive and c~early WMr~te~;;·~~:~:·~h:~!: s ua1 System, by Sherman J. Silber, · · cribner's Sons, 1981. ~orgotten Ladles, by Richard Wright. Phlladelphla: Lippincott, 928, Pages 93-104, 118-20, 301-2. 43

J The Strenge Story of Dr. Barry (see photo above, with his black servant and poodle), by Isobel Rae. London: Lor:gmans Green, 1958.

Women In Men'• Guise, by Oscar Paul Giibert. London: John Lane, 1932. The My1terlea of Sex: Women Who Posed as Men and Men Who Impersonated Women, by C. J. S. Thompson. New York: Causeway, 1974. The Uninvited Dilemma: A Question of Gender, by Kim Stuart (Metamorphous Press, P 0 Box 1712, Lake Oswego OR 97031.!). Interviews with 20 female-to-males; separate research supplement available. 44 Hercuune Barbin: Being the Recently Dl1COverad Memoirs of a ~neteenth-century French Hermaphrodite, trans. by Richard cDougall. New York: Pantheon Books, 1980.

Thell Love Muscle, by Bryce Britton. New York: The New American brary, 1983.

Women In War, by Francis Gribble. New York: E. P. Dutton & Co., 1917.

The Bold Women, by Helen Beal Woodward. New York: Farrar, Straus and Young, 1953. Chapter on Dr. Mary Walker.

Gallant ladlea, by Cameron Rogers. New York: Harcourt, Brace & Co., 1928. . A~entureasee and Adventurous Ladles, by Edmund 8· D Auvergne. New York: J. H. Sears & Co. Ferna1e Warriors by Ellen c. Clayton. London: Tinsley Bros., 1879· 2volum88. • ~ountaln Charley, or ihe Adventures of Mrs. E. J. Guerin, W~ U II 13 Yea,.. In Male Attire, by Mrs. E. J. Guerin. Oklahoma. nlveralty of Oklahoma Presa. 1968.

AND FILMS s~"''a . . . . rn as a female-to-male crossd Scarlett, starring Katherine Hepbu resser (see photo above), 1936. 45 Yentl, starring Barbra Streisand as a woman who crossdresses as a man to join a yeshiva (see ph.oto below), 1983.

Victor/Victoria, starring Julie Andrews as a woman who Imperson­ ates a man who crossdresses as a woman, 1982.

Zouzou, a French fllm with Josephine Baker In drag, 1934 .

...She Even Chewed Tobacco, a 45-mlnute· tape-allde show of women who passed as men In early San Francisco, produced by Or. Estelle Freedman and Liz Stevena. Distributor: Iris Fiim• (415) 549-3192, or write The San Francisco Leeblan & Gay History Project, Box 1663, San Franclaco CA 94103.

46 Two Girta Wanted, with Janet Gaynor 81 a girt disguised 81 a boy to get •Job In the big city, 1927.

Wiid Bop of the Roed, the story of a girt travetfng 81 a boy to avoid arrest for a murder In self-defense, 1933. I Wint What I Want, with Anne Heywood as Roy (see photo below), who undergoes a male-to-female operation, 1972.

47 The Hoodlum, starring Mary Pickford as a Park Avenue snob who disguises herself as a boy to learn about slum llfe, 1919.

Glrls Wiii Be Boys, starring Dolly Haas as a girl who posed as the grandson of a misogynist, 1934.

She Loves Me Not, features Miriam Hopkins disguised as a male student, aided by collegiate Bing Crosby, 1934.

The Amazons, starring three women who rebel against a male­ dominated society when they crash an all-male club, 1917.

The Siient Accuser, with Eleanor Boardman In male attire, 1924.

Almost a Lady, a comedy-drama with mistaken Identity and Impersonations of the same and opposite sex, 1926.

The Crystal Cup, In which Dorothy Mackall! attends a soclal affair as a man, 1927.

Beggars of Life, with Louise Brooks who disguises herself as a boy and hides In a. hobo camp, 1928.

Wings of the Morning, the story of a woman who Is reincarnated and disguises herself as a boy, 1937.

A Song to Remember, with Merle Oberon as Mme. Dudevant (the 19th century French novellst George Sand), 1945.

The Magician, with Ingrid Thulln passing as her husband's male pupll, 1959.

Queen Christina, with Greta Garbo as the 17th century Swedish heroine with a penchant for male attire, 1933.

A Man Like Eva, a German film with Eva Mattes as a male fllm director in a loosely adapted biography of Rainer Werner Fassbinder, 1983.

48 ILLUSTRATIONS Page Dr. Mary Walker ...... 2 Vesta Tilley ...... 6 Calamity Jane ...... 9 M ii ton B. Matson ...... 12 Dr. Alan L. Hart ...... 16 Charley Wi Ison ...... 21 Jack Bee Garland ...... 28 Murray H. Hall ...... 31 Ralph Kerwinieo ...... 39 Colonel Sir Victor Barker ...... 42 Dr. James Barry ...... 44 ''Sylvia Scarlett'' ...... 45 ''Yentl'' ...... 46 ''I Want What I Want'' ...... 47 "A Man Like Eva" ...... 48

2nd Edition, 1985

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1 1mHS' 1 fiU-~ST HANDBOOK, to :AODAESS THE' !NEEDS~ ·~-c ' - ' Q.fnrk~ 'FE,MA~a~TO•IVIAl.E ' "·-· -.. ---

.• '.0R08SOAE$SING

(f .P.A$.SIN.G AS. A Jv1AN

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* SEx FU~ASSl'GNMENT * 'DOZENS OF tRUE ·sroRI ES OF= FEMALES WHO CROSSED OVER

Cover Photo: ~·'IJo you blame me for wanting to be a ·man?'' Ralph Kerwlnieo, 1914