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Intimacies of Older Filipino Gay Men in Canada

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Intimacies of Older Filipino Gay Men in Canada A Different Shade of Grey: Intimacies of Older Filipino Gay Men in Canada by Fritz Luther Pino A thesis submitted in conformity with the requirements for the degree of Doctor of Philosophy Department of Social Justice Education Ontario Institute for Studies in Education University of Toronto © Copyright by Fritz Luther Pino 2019 A Different Shade of Grey: Intimacies of Older Filipino Gay Men in Canada Fritz Luther Pino Doctor of Philosophy Department of Social Justice Education, Ontario Institute For Studies in Education University of Toronto 2019 Abstract This dissertation is a qualitative study, which examined the experiences of intimacy of the older Filipino gay men in Canada. These group of men identify as bakla, which is the Filipino term for queer or non-normative gender and sexual identity, practices, and performances. I specifically investigated how older bakla engage and express their intimacies with the three significant groups of people in their lives, namely, their sexual partner, their family or blood- related kin, and their friends. The purpose of such inquiry was to understand the relationship dynamics that older bakla have with these three groups. Such significant figures are the potential sources of social and emotional support of the older bakla. Intersectionality theory from a queer diasporic–feminist gerontological lens informed the study that takes into account the social location of the informants in terms of sexuality and gender, race, diaspora, age, and class. In this study, I used both participant observations and in-depth interviews as the main methods of data collection. These methods were informed by a culturally-grounded approach, called kuwento, a Filipino version of storytelling. This type of storytelling allowed the informants of the study to articulate their experiences in a manner that was comfortable, accessible, and convenient for them. Using grounded theory for data analysis, older bakla revealed a different experience of ii intimacy with their significant others. A story of difference exists, because they do not necessarily resonate to the dominant stories of aging. Their stories of intimacies offer critique of the norms and dominant discourses of identity. As well, older bakla’s intimacies illuminate their sense of agency in negotiating the norms of gender, sexuality, ageing, class, diaspora, and race that have marginalized and oppressed their beings and subjectivities. In the conclusion, I discuss how their intimacies with significant others, which are conditioned by uncertainty, impact their well-being and ageing bodies and how these informed critical social work education and practice. This study offers important contributions to the field of gerontological social work, sexuality and queer studies, migration and transnationalism, and anti-oppressive epistemologies. iii Acknowledgements This work was not only been fueled by my own energy, but it was fueled by the many energies and love of the wonderful and kind people in my life. These people nurtured, guided, mentored, taught, showed, inspired, and supported me as I navigated North American academia. I want to first acknowledge my great mentor and supervisor Dr. Roland Sintos Coloma who guided, motivated, and walked me through the walls of Western academia. This guidance offered me the possibility of being in such a space as a racialized, first-generation Filipino queer. Maraming Salamat, Dr. Coloma for your genuine commitment of supporting historically marginalized students. Thank you for showing me the possibility of producing a scholarly work that I could truly embody, as well as showcase the histories and the experiences of the community that I care for. Next, to my amazing and brilliant committee members, starting with my thesis supervisor Dr. Ka Tat Tsang, who incredibly offered his infinite intellectual and academic support as well as guidance, not only in terms of completing my dissertation, but also to be able to thrive in the field of Canadian social work. Thank you so much Dr. Tsang for those moments of deep intellectual conversations, critical self-reflection, and for inspiring me to traverse to theoretical areas and boundaries, which would resonate the lives and experiences of my informants. To Dr. Izumi Sakamoto, I can’t thank you enough for your amazing commitment of providing me direction and thoughtful feedback that would bring out the strength of my scholarly and community work. To Dr. Abigail Bakan, thank you so much for helping me fine-tune my theoretical lenses and to think broadly of my work, particularly on its impact within the larger academic community, both locally and internationally. Next, to my informants who turned this project into a reality and to whom I dedicate this work; I am forever grateful. I am forever appreciative. I am forever humbled. I would forever be a student of your wisdom. Growing up queer in my little village in the Philippines, I see the crossing of our paths to create moments of conversation and reflection about being a Filipino queer in the diasporic context of Canda, as a gift from the universe. I am deeply honoured to have been given the opportunity to be able to listen to your stories, to be part of your experiences of the everyday, and to be bestowed with your trust to channel valuable life lessons to the next generations. I would not have able to arrive at this point of finishing this project without your generousity, kindness, loving support, thoughtfulness, belief, and patience. My life has been changed forever. Salamat Kaayu! iv The brilliance of my colleagues in the doctoral program have greatly offered their generative feedback and ideas to my work, thereby, making me a better thinker and writer. I want to thank my amazing friends in the Social Justice Education Department (SJE) at OISE namely, Dr. Marissa Largo, Dr. David Pereira, Dr. Shamette Hepburn, Kenneth Huynh, Eunice Chow, and Dr. Sophia Papastavrou Faustmann. You were all there when this work was still in my head, in my mouth, and in my very rough draft. Thank you for the elevator and hallway conversations of my free floating ideas, for spending the time to closely read my seemingly endless research proposal, for answering and receiving my midnight emails, and for the friendship that I truly need. I have travelled so many spots, houses, and places to be able to write. I have met wonderful people along the way and became great supporters and lifelong friends. I want to thank Monica Anne Batac for being a great true friend, teacher, life couch, and comrade. You were one of the witnesses of my ups and downs in academia and personal life, but you never gave up to be my friend and guide in such an English speaking world where I am in. Thank you for listening to my ideas, for the difficult questions that you asked about the complexity of my work, and the friendly reminders to get up beautifully in the morning to be able to write. Next, to Dr. Ilyan Ferrer, I can’t believe we’ve been friends long way before I entered the Ph.D. program! Thank you for the guide, inspiration, push, and strong faith in me, especially when moments of doubts and uncertainties strike. You are a kuya who motivated me to keep on going and venturing the academic world and to always believe in the potential contributions of my work. To Dr. Jessica Ticar, thank you for the generousity and magic! I am forever grateful of the time, skills, and knowledge that you shared to me, and to be able to write this dissertation to spots and places that would remind us of the great powers of our ancestors who help us to come to this far. To my special colleague at SJE, Miss Jacklyn San Antonio. Thank you for your awesomeness, brilliance, fierceness, and humility. Your strong engagement and scrutiny of my ideas, thoughts, and methodological lenses not only made me a better writer, but also a better scholar and person. Thank you for being such a very good friend and life couch and for being one of my role model of beauty, eloquence, and wit. And to my dearest friend Dr. Raluca Bejan in the Faculty of Social Work, thank you for being there with me since MSW days. You never get tired of helping me work through my ideas, for believing in the beauty of my work, for showing and giving me the opportunities to be successful, and for being such a great true friend. Thank you for being a great writing partner and the countless days and nights of writing our thesis drafts in v your cozy sofa, motivating and inspiring each other, lamenting of being far away from our homelands, and daydreaming with the philosophers that we admired from afar. To my friends and mentors in the community who continue to believe in my work, for being so patient of waiting for me to finish, and for being so understanding and kind to offer their hopes and positive energy so I could complete my project. I would like to first thank Miss Trisha Steinberg from Asian Community AIDS Services (ACAS) who, without hesitation, offered me direction and entry points in the community. We’ve known each other during my first few months in Toronto, and even up to now, you never get tired of helping and supporting me. Thank you, Che! Next, to Miss Jazmine Manalo of the Silayan Community Centre, thank you for believing and trusting me as you openly open your doors to show me the beauty of downtown Toronto, eversince in my first few years in Canada. Thank you for your brilliant ideas and direction on how to go about my research that would not dismiss the everyday struggles of the older folks in our community.
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