AN O INDEPENDENTU VOICE FOR THE TLESBIAN, GAY, BISEXUAL, AND TRANSGENDER COMMUNITIES August 21, 2015 | Volume XIII, Issue 8 Jury Convicts Man in Mount Vernon Double Murder By Steve Charing hearing a wisecrack from one of the men. Although both Three years after a botched robbery led to A third unidentified man was also involved victims were gay, the murder of two men in Mount Vernon, a in the robbery but identified Bass from a police ruled out a Baltimore jury convicted Quinton Decarlo photo lineup, according to the Baltimore hate crime as they Bass, 28 where he faces two life sentenc- Sun. determined that the es plus 140 years for fatally shooting Law- Three weeks after the shooting, po- motive for the attack rence Peterson, 56, and Joseph Alexander lice said that Bass, a drifter from Raleigh, was robbery. Ulrich, “Alex” Ulrich, Jr., 40. North Carolina, was ar- an actor who Ulrich died from gunshot wounds that rested on gun charges on had worked day. Peterson died in May 2014 following August 31, 2012. Officers ‘A case of with special- multiple surgeries and rehabilitation as a took Bass, who had a pre- senseless needs chil- result of shots to his torso. vious criminal record, into dren, had re- Larry Peterson and Alex Ulrich The victims were standing on the front custody after they found violence’ cently moved steps of a bed and breakfast – Empire him and four others drink- to Baltimore to start a photography as well as robbery and handgun counts. House, an historic 1874 brownstone – that ing alcohol in East Mount career. Peterson was a popular The Sun stated that Assistant State’s Peterson owned next to the Belvedere Ho- Vernon Park. Bass was carrying a hand- neighborhood activist and was dubbed the Attorney Tonya LaPolla told jurors that it tel on East Chase Street just before 4 a.m. gun. “Unofficial Mayor of Mount Vernon.” was a “case of senseless violence on the on August 10, 2012, when Bass attempted The Sun reported that one of the men Bass’s trial had been delayed by sev- streets of this city.” to rob them. When he netted nothing in who was with Bass told police that the gun eral postponements including one when She praised lead Detective Joshua the robbery, Bass had left the scene but he was carrying was a replacement for the Peterson eventually died. However, jurors Ellsworth, who has since left the Baltimore returned and fired seven shots. A witness 9mm. Bass had disposed of the gun fol- required just two hours to convict Bass on Police Department and returned from out testified that Bass fired the shots after lowing the shooting of Ulrich and Peterson. all charges, including two counts of murder of state to testify. t

opinion explains: “In our view, this conclusion is compelled not only AG Clarifies Law on Adultery, Divorce by the broad purposes behind the an attorney. Del. Clippinger concept of adultery in the family law con- for Same-Sex Couples stated, “As a sponsor of the text, but also by the respect and dignity 2012 legislation that estab- owed to same-sex marriages as equal to Maryland advocates in the areas of fam- lished marriage equality for opposite-sex marriages under State law. ily law and LGBT rights welcomed a formal same-sex couples in Maryland, I am very We see no reason either to define adultery opinion of the state’s attorney general, Bri- pleased with the attorney general’s con- so narrowly as to ignore ‘the sexual reali- an E. Frosh, which concludes that sexual clusion that extramarital sexual conduct ties of our world’ ... or to deny same-sex intimacy between a married person and a should be treated the same for all married couples the ability to divorce on the same person who is not their spouse qualifies as couples in Maryland, regardless of sexual terms as other married couples.” adultery, for purposes of Maryland divorce orientation.” Statewide advocates applauded the law, regardless of the gender of the par- In the opinion, the attorney general re- opinion. Jer Welter, managing attorney ties. views Maryland law dating back to 1650, and deputy director of FreeState Legal, re- The 15-page opinion, dated July 24, as well as judicial decisions in other states, marked: “This thoroughly researched opin- 2015, comes in response to a February to determine that “the term ‘adultery’ in- ion will be very helpful to Maryland judges 2015 request from Del. Luke H. Clippinger cludes a spouse’s extramarital sexual infi- and lawyers, as well as divorcing couples, (D-Baltimore City, Dist. 46), who is also delity with a person of the same sex.” The —continued on page 3 2 t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD AUGUST 21, 2015 • baltimoreoutloud.com news // LOCAL

Adul tery, Divorce for Civil War Expert to Speak at Prime Timers Same-Sex Couples “Especially in the era of nationwide By Steve Charing acclaimed five-year project titled “The War – continued from page 1 marriage equality, this opinion is an im- Daniel Carroll Toomey, a leading authority Came by Train,” commemorating the 150th portant clarification that marriage equality on the Civil War in Maryland, will be the anniversary of the Civil War. The title of who might otherwise assume incorrectly means equal treatment in all aspects of guest speaker at the Prime Toomey’s lecture is “The that Maryland’s legal definition of ‘adultery’ marriage,” said attorney P. Lindsay Parvis, Timers of Baltimore meet- First Front,” in which he is limited to opposite-sex relations.” co-chair of the legislative committee of the ing on September 13 at 6 presents a very convincing “We’re glad the attorney general has Maryland State Bar Association’s Family & p.m. It will take place at St. case that the first military clarified that the law applies equally to Juvenile Law Section Council. Mark’s Lutheran Church, and political objective of same- and opposite-sex couples. This In June 2015, the U.S. Supreme Court which is located at St. Paul the Civil War was the Bal- common-sense opinion dispels outdated ruled in the case of Obergefell v. Hodges & 20th Streets. timore and Ohio Railroad. notions with thoughtful reasoning that af- that all states in the nation must legally Toomey is the author Following the lecture, firms the dignity of all couples regardless recognize marriage between same-sex or co-author of ten books he will be available for a of gender,” said Keith Thirion, acting direc- couples, as Maryland has done since 2013. relating to that subject in- book signing and book tor of Equality Maryland. The Maryland attorney general issues cluding The Civil War in purchases Adultery is one of several long-recog- formal opinions, representing the consid- Maryland, Baltimore Dur- Prime Timers of Balti- nized “fault-based” grounds for divorce ered views of the attorney general on sig- ing the Civil War, and The more is a chapter of Prime under Maryland law (married couples may nificant questions of Maryland law, in re- Maryland Line Confeder- Timers World Wide, a also divorce on certain “no-fault” grounds, sponse to questions from Maryland public ate Soldiers Home. He has group of older gay or bi- such as a one-year separation). According officials. Opinions of the attorney general lectured for a number of sexual men (and younger to the attorney general’s opinion, a mar- are ordinarily considered strongly persua- colleges and institutions men who admire mature ried person may obtain a divorce from an sive to Maryland judges and lawyers. including Johns Hopkins men). Their members are unfaithful spouse on the ground of adul- The full text of the Attorney General’s University and the Smith- men who have chosen to tery, regardless of whether their spouse’s July 24, 2015 opinion can be reviewed sonian Institution. Daniel Carroll Toomey have their social lives en- infidelity is committed with someone of the online at Oag.state.md.us/Opinions/2015/ Toomey has won numerous awards riched by the many diverse activities in same or the opposite sex. 100OAG105.pdf. t for his historical research and exhibits. which the members engage. For further He is the guest curator at the Baltimore information, call 410-252-7239, or contact & Ohio Railroad Museum for their highly Prime Timers at [email protected]. t F.T. Burden to Leave AIRS

F.T. Burden, the head of AIDS Interfaith HIV-positive ex-offenders Residential Services (AIRS) and Empire • Un Nuevo Comienzo (A New Begin- Homes of Maryland (EHM) is leaving Sep- ning) supportive housing program in Balti- tember 4 after 15 years to take over the more City and leadership of Family and Children’s Ser- County serving HIV+ immigrant clients vices of Central Maryland. with limited English profi- “During Mr. Burden’s ciency, of mainly tenure with the organiza- Hispanic/Latino origin tions, AIRS and its sub- • People on the Move sidiaries have grown sig- (POTM) a client operated nificantly,” the group said workforce development in a statement. “Under his program that trains and leadership, Mr. Burden employs 10 AIRS resi- raised the awareness and dents who provide shuttle credibility of AIRS and transportation service for EHM, establishing solid the Baltimore City relationships with govern- shelter and homeless ment officials, foundation F .T. Burden overflow providers. heads and civic leaders. credit: Bob Ford • City Steps, a consor- He is credited with helping tium of supportive transi- to grow the organization’s annual operat- tional and permanent housing programs ing budget from $1 million to $8 million and for homeless and unstably housed youth with tripling the number of persons housed ages 18-24. Programs currently house 125 by the organization.” youth. During Burden’s tenure AIRS under- The group’s board appointed Anthony took a number of new initiatives, including: Butler, Esq., to serve as interim head of • At the Door scattered site supportive AIRS and a search committee has been transitional and permanent housing pro- formed to find a permanent person for that gram targeting role. t

BALTIMORE OUTLOUD AUGUST 21, 2015 • baltimoreoutloud.com t 3 Venue for 2015 Pride block party credit: Marti Wormuth

news // local Rainbow Direction Takes Aim at Homophobia Arrest Made in Henderson Killing By Stephanie Hunt to his Instagram On August 8, thou- and tweeted his sands of fans con- congratulations By Steve Charing verged on Baltimore’s on the day the At a press conference at Baltimore police M&T Bank Stadium for Supreme Court headquarters on August 6, Interim Com- a concert they’d been passed mar- missioner Kevin Davis announced an ar- eagerly anticipating for riage equality, rest in the murder of transgender woman months. Along with the and skipped up Mia Henderson. Bal- usual concert attire of stage with a timore police charged handmade shirts sport- Canadian Pride Shawn Oliver, a Hag- ing band members’ flag draped erstown man, in the names and faces was around his fatal stabbing. Hen- a trend you wouldn’t shoulders dur- derson’s body was usually expect at a ing their perfor- found around 6 a.m. concert – a very color- mance in Van- on July 16, 2014, in ful trend. Mixed in with couver. an alley in the 3400 the marriage propos- And then block of Piedmont Av- als and inside jokes there’s the Shawn Oliver enue, near Lake Ash- were enough rainbows stuffed rain- credit: Baltimore County burton in Northwest for a Pride rally – and R ainbow signs at One Direction concert bow bear that Police Department Baltimore. indeed, with all of the source: Twitter.com sits on stage The announce- rainbow flags draped at every show. ment brought a sigh around these concertgoers like capes and stage, there were too many rainbow flags Affectionately referred to by many fans as of relief to many in Baltimore’s LGBT com- rainbow face paint and rainbow beads, one to count. “Rainbow Bondage Bear” (RBB) because munity as various members of the LGBT would be completely forgiven for assum- The number of 1D fans determined to its first outfit when it emerged mid-tour last Advisory Council shared the podium with ing these fans were on their way to a rally show their support for the LGBTQ commu- year was bondage gear made out of elec- Davis and the detectives, principally Det. rather than a One Direction (1D) concert. nity isn’t a random coincidence. Rainbow trical tape (seriously), this bear has been Robert Ross and Sgt. Richard Purtell, who There’s no mix-up, though – these 1D Direction was created before 1D’s 2014 dressed up in a wide range of tiny rainbow worked on the case. Another transgender fans who showed up decked out in rain- world tour in direct response to the ho- tee shirts and fluffy tutus. If you squinted murder victim, Kandy Hall was killed six bows are part of a fan-driven initiative mophobia fans experience at 1D concerts hard, plugged your ears, and hummed 1D’s weeks prior to Henderson but that case is known as Rainbow Direction (RD), an and elsewhere. When asked about the fan first album until the industry-directed heter- still open. organization dedicated to stamping out base’s homophobia, Baltimore resident onormativity drowned out any alternatives, Oliver, 44, had been incarcerated in homophobia in 1D’s fan base. Accord- and concert attendee Kate Anthony de- you could almost argue this little bear is just Hagerstown for an unrelated offense and ing to the press release issued by RD for scribed it as “super intense.” colorful rather than deliberately queer – if has been charged with murder in the first the Baltimore concert, 96 people had of- “You can’t say or do anything without it weren’t for the multiple references to fa- degree, murder in the second degree, and ficially signed up to be among the 2,700 getting attacked for some reason,” she mous members of the LGBTQ community. assault in the first degree in the Henderson participants worldwide who agreed to bring said in reference to the fan base. “You When 1D came to Baltimore, RBB was case, according to the charging document rainbows to their concerts in an effort to can’t make a post about any of the boys dressed up as Baltimore native Divine – obtained by Baltimore OUTloud. The docu- make LGBTQ concertgoers feel safe and doing something nice for the queer commu- yes, that Divine – and was even accompa- ment lists Kevin Long, Mia Henderson’s welcome or, in the case of the LGBTQ con- nity without someone coming in and attack- nied by a pink lawn flamingo and a vinyl of prior name, as the victim. certgoers themselves, express their pride ing you and twisting it around. It’s terrifying... Little Baby to drive the point home. Henderson’s brother is NBA player and find others like themselves. anytime there’s a rainbow you get ambushed Regardless of their intention or moti- Reggie Bullock who now plays for the De- Looking at the final result for the Bal- for supporting it or being excited about it.” vation, 1D is clearly making a point of ac- troit Pistons. In a Tweet, he thanked the timore show, it seems as though Rainbow She added, “It’s been fostered from outside knowledging and validating one of the most police department for pursuing the mur- Direction achieved its goals, at least on of the fandom and it just grows. Every single vulnerable parts of their fan base: reinforc- derer but still refers to Henderson as his this stop of 1D’s worldwide tour. The offi- time something happens, it just gets worse.” ing the message sent out by Rainbow Di- “brother.” cial website clocked in the final confirmed Luckily, as far as the band itself goes, the rection to young LGBTQ fans that it’s okay During the attack in which she sus- number of participants in Baltimore at fans have enjoyed substantial support from for them to be the way they are. tained stab wounds to the chest, arms, and 126, making Baltimore’s RD participants the members recently. There are several fan “I think Rainbow Direction tries to pro- back according to the charging document, the largest group in the country thus far. reports of the band noticing and waving or vide a safe space, and in our fandom we Davis said that Henderson fought back. In A quick glance around the stadium at giving a thumbs-up to rainbow signs in the need that more than anything,” fan Kate doing so, some DNA belonging to Oliver show time confirmed or even exceeded audience, and Harry Styles in particular has said. “Just seeing a bunch of rainbow was discovered under Henderson’s finger the group’s official numbers; rainbow been especially enthusiastic in his support hearts on social media in a row is comfort- tips during a post-mortem examination. signs could clearly be seen in the stands, for the LGBTQ community. Last year he ing, the fact that it’s for the fans... it’s just “Mia fought back; and thank God that and in the field section set up right by the gave concertgoers a cheerful “Happy Pride” trying to provide a place for people to go she fought back because we were able to on June 27, wore a Michael Sam jersey dur- and to know it’s okay.” close this case with a DNA hit when DNA ing their St. Louis concert during August, She adds, “The fact that the boys ex- was recovered from underneath her fin- and commented that gender was “not that press support is just an extra. Considering gertips and later matched to our suspect,” important” in regard to what he looked for all of the homophobia tossed at the fandom Davis said. in a partner during a November interview. and that continues to fester there, an initia- Police declined to disclose the possi- This summer Styles posted a Pride flag tive like this is necessary.” t ble motive of the crime nor whether or not

4 t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD AUGUST 21, 2015 • baltimoreoutloud.com news // local // national

Henderson was targeted because she was man, founder of Sistas of the T and who LGBT as the case is still under investiga- was at the podium during the press con- Julian Bond, Civil Rights Icon, Dies at 75 tion and they do not want to compromise ference, told Baltimore OUTloud. “Also, further evidence gathering. this one good deed doesn’t absolve the By Steve Charing marriage equality. In doing so, Bond cou- “The LGBT community is a vulnerable BCPD of the many misdeeds it has com- Longtime civil rights activist Julian Bond rageously argued that gay rights are civil community,” noted Davis. “They have been mitted against our community, nor does it died on August 15 at the age of 75 af- rights – a position not shared by many impacted disproportionately by violent mean that major changes no longer need ter a brief illness in Fort Walton Beach, other African-Americans who resent the crime. Certainly in 2014 back-to-back mur- to take place on this police force; they are Florida, according to the Southern Pov- comparison. ders of LGBT members is something that still needed.” erty Law Center (SPLC), which he served “Sexual disposition parallels race. I was shook this city and got everyone’s attention. Patrick Paschall, executive director of as founding president born black and had no We need to do more and we need to do bet- FreeState Legal Project, was also present in the 1970s. “Julian choice. I couldn’t change ter to form the necessary partnership with at the press conference. “While nothing Bond was a hero and, and wouldn’t change if the LGBT community and we’re hopeful that can bring Mia back to this world, we hope I’m privileged to say, I could,” explained Mr. the closure in the murder of Miss Mia Hen- that the BCPD’s efforts to identify and bring a friend,” President Bond in Baltimore sever- derson brings us towards that goal.” murder charges against Mia’s attacker will Obama said in a state- al years ago. “Like race, Davis introduced Police Maj. Stanley begin the healing process for the transgen- ment. our sexuality isn’t a pref- Brandford who thanked the LGBT commu- der community in Baltimore,” he said in a Bond was elected to erence; it is immutable, nity for “all the assistance that they gave statement following the conference. “How- four terms in the Geor- unchangeable, and the us, constantly being in touch with us, en- ever, we recognize that true healing can- gia House of Represen- Constitution protects us couraging us not to forget Mia. And just not be brought about without addressing tatives and later to six Julian Bond advocating for all against prejudices and like Mia, we won’t forget the other victim the systemic issues that make low-income terms in the Georgia marriage equality in a video discrimination based on that’s out there” and pledged to work these transgender people of color far more vul- Senate, having served source: Youtube.com immutable differences.” cases every day. nerable to daily and mortal violence.” a combined twenty years in both legisla- During the fight for Community leaders are pleased that an He added, “Too often, transgender tive chambers. From 1998 to 2010, he was same-sex marriage in Maryland, Bond ap- arrest has been made but note more work people experience discrimination, harass- chairman of the National Association for peared in a video in 2011 in an effort to per- lies ahead especially in improving relations ment, and violence due to their transgen- the Advancement of Colored People. suade those African-Americans who oppose with the LGBT community. der identity. Today’s announcement sends While much of Bond’s life and career marriage equality. He wrote a letter pub- “While I’m glad that they’ve caught a clear message to Baltimore’s LGBTQ was devoted to attaining civil rights and lished in the Baltimore Sun stating, “discrimi- Mia’s killer, I know that there is so much community that the BCPD take violence justice for African-Americans, he was nation is wrong no matter who the victim is.” more work to be done,” Monica York- against transgender people seriously.” t particularly instrumental in the quest for —continued on page 6

BALTIMORE OUTLOUD AUGUST 21, 2015 • baltimoreoutloud.com t 5 Kate Lynn Blatt beyond the beltway

compiled by Jim Becker were allowed to give evidence at their trial. difficult for transgender people to get birth No pardon for Both pleaded “not guilty” to the charge. certificates that match who they are.” Gar- Nevertheless, the jury returned a guilty den State Equality executive director An- Police sting last two men verdict. The law against ‘buggery’ (enacted drea Bowen called the surgery requirement in 1533 and not repealed until 2003) was “absurd and gruesome” but also “out of line and likely hanged for gay based on an interpretation of the Bible that with what the federal government does for regarded homosexual acts as an abomina- U.S. passports and Social Security records entrapment near sex in England tion and worthy of death. The judge had and what New Jersey already does for its no hesitation in sentencing them to death. drivers’ licenses.” t (Philadelphia Gay Rehoboth Beach London, England – One hundred and William Bonill was sentenced to 14 years News – Jen Colletta at Epgn.com) eighty years ago, on November 27, 1835, a transportation to Australia. He died in Tas- Rehoboth Beach, Del. – Twelve men crowd gathered for the hanging of the last mania in 1841. Smith, it seems, had no were arrested by Delaware police last two men in England to be executed for the friends. But the friends of Pratt commenced month at a gay-male cruising area about “abominable crime of buggery” (anal sex). a vigorous unsuccessful campaign to save Julian Bond, Civil Rights three miles northwest of Rehoboth Beach. Only three months earlier, in late August him from the gallows. They gathered a Icon, Dies at 75 The arrests took place in a section of Cape 1835, James Pratt (30) had said goodbye substantial petition, whose signatories in- – continued from page 5 Henlopen State Park known as Wolfe Neck, to his wife and two young daughters and cluded the trial prosecutor, former employ- according to a statement issued by the Del- headed off looking for work. Before return- ers, neighbors and even George and Jane The next year, he penned an op-ed aware Department of Natural Resources ing home, Pratt paused for a drink in an Berkshire, the men’s accusers. Last year, in the Afro-American explaining, “There and Environmental Control. The men were ale house where he met John Smith (40), a request to issue a posthumous pardon are thousands of African Americans – our charged with violations such as criminal and William Bonill, aged 68. Neither could was rejected by the Justice Ministry which brothers and sisters, cousins, neighbors, solicitation, offensive touching, lewdness, offer him a job but their company was regretted the men’s execution; acknowl- and co-workers – who are gay, in commit- indecent exposure and loitering to engage hospitable and the three went back to Bo- edged that it should have never happened ted relationships, and want to marry.” in or solicit sex, according to the statement. nill’s rented flat. Little did Pratt and Smith but insisted that the conditions for granting Bond had famously boycotted the fu- John F. Brady, an attorney for two of the know that this get-together would result in a pardon had not been met. (Peter Tatchell neral services for Coretta Scott King in men, said authorities are continuing to en- their execution – and that Bonill would be Foundation – Peter Tatchell at PeterTatch- 2006 on the grounds that the King children gage in undercover sting operations in the ellFoundation.org) had chosen an anti-gay mega-church as the area. “My advice to the LGBT community is venue. Bond had referred to the minister as to avoid public places such as Wolfe Neck a “raving homophobe.” This was in conflict when looking for love this summer,” Brady with their mother’s longstanding support for told PGN. “My understanding is there will be NJ Governor the rights of gay and lesbian people. more stings. I will monitor the situation.” He LGBT leaders paid tribute to Julian said authorities released the defendants’ Christie again Bond on his passing. “Very few throughout names in a news release, but only one me- human history have embodied the ideals dia outlet published them. vetoes pro of honor, dignity, courage, and friendship Brady gave his perspective of the ar- like Julian Bond,” said Chad Griffin, presi- rests, which he said occurred in mid-July. transgender bill dent of the Human Rights Campaign, in a “There were people complaining about banished to the penal colony of Australia statement. “Quite simply, this nation and men being at Wolfe Neck, loitering. Ap- within a mere three months of their chance Trenton, New Jerey – New Jersey this world are far better because of his life parently, it’s also on an Internet site where encounter. Gov. Chris Christie, a Republican presi- and commitment to equality for all people. you can pick up people. So the park po- Bonill’s landlords, Jane and George dential contender, this week vetoed legis- Future generations will look back on his life lice decided to set up a sting operation.” Berkshire, disapproved of the behavior lation that would have eased restrictions and legacy and see a warrior for good who Brady expressed concern that some of the their tenant, William Bonill, who they re- for changing gender markers on birth cer- helped conquer hate in the name of love. tificates. The state’s current law mandates I will greatly miss my friend and my hero, Taking down arrests resulted from entrapment. “All 12 garded as an “old villain.” He had been the flag of the men are facing significant fines and bringing men back to his flat on a regular proof of gender-reassignment surgery be- Julian Bond.” possible prison time,” Brady added. “The basis; sometimes twice a day. George was fore a birth certificate can be changed. Keith Thirion, acting executive director most they were guilty of was suggestive determined to put a stop to these goings- The New Jersey legislature in June for Equality Maryland, praised Bond for the language, to my understanding. Unfortu- on and get rid of what he regarded as a approved a bill that would have required work he did in Maryland and elsewhere. nately, that could be enough evidence to troublesome lodger. George spied into proof of clinical treatment for gender tran- “Julian Bond was a staunch supporter of convict. One or two may have touched Bonill’s room and Jane peeped through sition, but not surgery, in order for the equality and justice for all and a visionary their pants near their genitals, which could Bonill’s keyhole. They both claimed that gender marker to be updated. Nine other leader for civil rights,” Thirion told Balti- have been suggestive in nature. And one they had seen Pratt and Smith perform states plus Washington, D.C., have enact- more OUTloud. “He was an early and ac- gentleman may have actually touched an anal sex. Bonill had left to buy a drink and ed similar laws. The legislature passed a tive supporter of our efforts to win marriage undercover officer, perhaps on the shoul- was not present. All three were soon ar- similar bill last year, but Christie also ve- equality and a friend to Equality Maryland. der.” Brady hasn’t seen any evidence of rested. Pratt and Smith were charged with toed that measure. His advocacy for racial justice and tireless sexual contact between the defendants, “buggery” (sodomy or anal sex) and Bonill “Gov. Christie has elected to allow his commitment to ending oppression and dis- nor between the defendants and the un- as an accessory. The arresting police of- state’s birth-certificate laws to deteriorate crimination against all marginalized groups dercover officers. “To my knowledge, all ficer had no material evidence to support despite the overwhelming majority of sup- will continue to inspire across many move- were charged because of their interactions the charge. The prosecution rested solely port from the legislature to modernize,” ments. The country, and the cause for jus- with the undercover police officers, and no on the evidence of George and Jane Berk- said Arli Christian, state policy counsel for tice, has lost a hero.” sexual activity occurred with those police shire and their ability to see what they tes- National Center for Transgender Equality. He is survived by his wife, Pamela officers,” he said. (Philadelphia Gay News tified to is questionable. “His veto keeps in place outdated; burden- Horowitz, a former SPLC staff attorney, his – Tim Cwiek at Epgn.com) Neither James Pratt nor John Smith some requirements that make it incredibly five children, a brother and a sister. t

6 t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD AUGUST 21, 2015 • baltimoreoutloud.com out in the valley When Other Parents Parent Nothing is more frustrating than being in the middle of a public You situation with your child and having someone else try to tell you how to parent more effectively. Now, you have to take your focus away from whatever it was you were handling and move that focus to the person who thinks he or she knows so much more about the situation than you ever could. This is usually a person who does not know you or your child. Usually, the person is well-meaning, but almost al- ways the encounter leaves you feeling like you’re a total failure as a parent. So many young parents want to know, “How do I deal with other people butting into my parenting moments?” Tony is a young man in his mid-twen- Tony was giving instructions as the boy feet away to talk to the woman who had Trust in your ability to parent your child. ties. He’s a big guy, with a booming voice lifted the groceries out of the cart when a been so obnoxious. Take advice when you need it, but don’t be and lots of muscles. And, he loves working woman came up behind him and grabbed He pointed out that not only had she up- afraid to tell the random busybody to walk with special-needs teens. He’s really good his arm. She began to yell at him and berate set his kid, her own daughter was in tears away. This is your child. You are doing the with them. He gives them the love and sup- him for “making the poor retarded boy” do and appeared frightened. He went on to best job you possibly can. t port they need, but he has high expecta- the work for him. She insulted his physical explain that she had disrupted a lesson for Rev. Kelly Crenshaw is the mom of 16 tions for them, too. Right now, he works as appearance and made fun of the fact that a this young man with special needs and that, adopted kids, two biological kids and foster a nanny for a family with grown man would thanks to her interference, had most likely mom of dozens. She is co-owner of a coun- teenagers. make a kid do the made it harder for this kid to feel comfort- selling agency that works with children and One of the things work. able in the store for quite some time. And, their families and is co-pastor of New Light he does with his kids is Tony was he went on, it had taken years to establish MCC, the first openly LGBT friendly church teach them how to shop. shocked and the level of trust that allowed that young in Washington County. His goal is to help them Parenting didn’t know what man to go to the store and begin to shop. learn the skills they will OUTloud to say, at first. There’s no way to know if his words need in order to become That’s when he made an impact that day. I’d like to think as self-sufficient and in- Rev. Kelly Crenshaw realized that his that, at the very least, she hesitates before dependent as possible. young charge confronting someone else as they interact So, every couple of weeks, he will take them was getting upset. The teen began to roll with their kids. Or maybe, someone else, to the store to do the grocery shopping for his head and wave his arms, which for this hearing what happened became a little the household. They work with him to cre- kid was a clear sign that he was becom- more tolerant and less judgmental. ate a list of everything they will need. And ing overwhelmed. Fortunately, the woman We all make mistakes with our children. then, they walk through the store together, chose to stop her tirade and walk off. But We all have moments when we aren’t sure looking at prices and making decisions. He Tony realized that, despite his personal if the decisions we make are the best. How- makes suggestions, but leaves much of the anxiety, he needed to educate the woman ever, what we all have in common is that we process up to the kids. on the impact of her behavior. So, leaving love our kids and we want them to be the I realize that Tony isn’t their parent, but the older teen in charge, he walked a few best they can possibly be. as one of their caregivers, he functions like a parent. The lessons he teaches are im- portant and the kids respond to his no non- sense approach to growing up. He respects their differences and they trust that he will be fair. But all it took was one moment for that trust to be shattered. Tony was shopping with two of the teens. The older is going blind. The younger deals with the chal- lenges of autism. The boys had finished fill- ing their cart and approached the checkout line. As they approached, Tony instructed the older boy to go ahead of the cart so that he could place the bags in the cart as they were filled. Tony stayed behind with the younger boy to help him load the conveyor. BALTIMORE OUTLOUD AUGUST 21, 2015 • baltimoreoutloud.com t 7 OUT in the Valley

too much for them to “Shortly after taking ferently had they handle. And so they stayed for that hour. left. It made me sad. their seat, the But it makes me I was sad not be- couple abruptly got question myself as Spirit cause they left the well. When have I sanctuary. I don’t up, gathered their missed the Spirit’s Speaks know them and touch because I was Rev. Dr. Rob Apgar-Taylor frankly their opinion belongings, and left the sure I knew bet- of me is really not church in a huff.” ter than someone my business! I was else? When has my What If They sad in small part lack of openness to because every once in a while something “the Spirit in another” kept me from being Had Stayed? happens (like this) that reminds me of the blessed in a way that maybe I didn’t ex- world in which we live. I am very fortunate pect? Maybe if I could just put aside my One Sunday several months ago, we had to have the career I do. I forget that the own agenda and listen to the voice and guests at church. We have guests most world is not always as loving and accept- experience of another, I might experience Sundays so this is nothing out of the or- ing as my progressive UCC experience God in a new way. But in order to do that… dinary. But what was odd was that shortly leads me to believe. And once in a while in order to be open to God’s voice, I some- after taking their seat, the couple abruptly something happens and a small slap of times need to silence my own. t got up, gathered their belongings, and left reality comes through. (And unfortunately, the church in a huff. They threw the bul- yes, this slap usually comes wrapped in a letin in the garbage in the narthex before Christian bow.) Yes, we have come a long leaving and did not speak to the ushers. way, but we have so far yet to come. Life’s Something was awry. Then I realized what It made me sad in larger part because it must have been. That morning in the of what they missed that day. It was a glo- Struggles bulletin was a full page insert and an an- rious service. They missed excellent mu- nouncement, inviting the church family to sic, a loving, accepting faith community, b y Rev. Kelly Crenshaw join my husband and me as we renew our and (hopefully) the presence of the Spirit Sometimes, life isn’t fair. And, while marriage vows in honor of our 10th wed- through word and worship. I can’t help but the adults may be able to handle life’s ding anniversary. This was (apparently) wonder if they would have seen things dif- ups and downs, kids are just learning. Friends are mean. We don’t get the things we want. Loved ones get sick. Sometimes, they die. that’s the family reunion and he al- Here are some of the overheard ways hates going to that. This way, conversations of the past he’ll have an excuse to stay home.” week: From my baby grandson’s mom “Tina and Nathan Kelly’s as the baby was wheeled off for aren’t friends anymore. heart surgery, “Sometimes, I just Now, I have to choose Kids want to put my head on my mom- which one is my friend. I my’s shoulder and cry. But, I’m too like them both.” old for that.” (No sweetheart, you’re “How come Derek gets to go to after never too old to want your school daycare? They have so much mommy.) fun there. I want to Kids, life go.” “Didn’t isn’t fair, but Derek say he there are doesn’t like many more that daycare.” good things “Yeah, but than bad. that’s because Just re- I’m not there.” member “I miss Lily. that when She was the life gets best dog in the tough, your whole world. I parents wish I could throw are there to help you her ball straight though – even when you’re a parent up to heaven.” yourself. t “Is Grandpa really going to die?” – Compiled and commented on by “Yes, he is.” “When?” “We don’t know Rev. Kelly Crenshaw for sure.” “Well, I hope it’s before Sun- day.” “Ummmm…. Why?” “Because

8 t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD AUGUST 21, 2015 • baltimoreoutloud.com OUT in the Valley

ed. (If it were still all-inclusive there would a person (almost always a heterosexual In part two we will examine the ever- be far fewer additional identifiers on the male) who occasionally wears the clothing changing language of transgender accep- Beyond LGBT spectrum.) and accessories of the other gender (how- tance – what works and what may be hold- the Also of note, it is inappropriate to use ever that might be defined) to present as ing us back. Until then, please remember Ice the term “transgendered.” Transgender is that gender. Self-described cross-dressers these three things: an adjective, not a verb – it describes a seldom identify as a gender other than that • Gender is not binary – it is a broad Machine group of people and is not about some- assigned at birth. spectrum. L:aura Anderson thing that happened to them. We never see So, I ask the reader, based on our dis- • The word transgender may not fully gayed or lesbianed. cussion thus far, are cross-dressers trans- include the entire gender spectrum. Most sources define “transgender” as gender? (In reality, no matter what I may • Each of us must have the freedom to Trans a condition in which an individual identifies have written or you may have read, the self-identify. anywhere across the gender spectrum that only true way to find out would be to ask.) Our language is dynamic and the words Language differs from their as- (By the way, we use to describe our identities and our signed sex at birth. women are afforded journeys are ever-changing. t As language continues to evolve, so too So, if the doctor an- “Early in my transition such freedom in their Part one of a two-part series. Laura An- do the terms we use to conceptualize the nounced to your I told my friends who clothing choices that derson is an educator, author, researcher, transgender experience. Although some of mom and dad that they are never re- parent, and granddad. Her years teaching in this may be controversial with differing in- they were the proud were cross-dressers ally considered to public school classrooms as male provided terpretations, here is my attempt to bring parents of a gender- that I would go home be cross-dressers. the foundation for her more recent role edu- us up to date. queer baby, you are In our society, it is cating future teachers. Living female for the For starters, even the term transgen- not technically trans- after our monthly perfectly acceptable past decade, she has come to appreciate der is increasingly problematic. Our ideas gender if you identify for women to dress the privileges she once held – both male and of what it means to be trans have evolved as such – only if you meetings and cry until and even pres- cisgender – privileges now replaced with the from a time when we viewed the gender identify anywhere on dawn because I did not ent as men – why fulfillment of living as her true self. world as binary, when a trans person was the spectrum other wouldn’t anyone either male to female (MTF) of female to than where the doc- want to remove all of want to aspire to a male (FTM). We have come to realize that tor inadvertently place of power and one’s gender can be self-identified any- placed you. (I sup- the things that made dominance? Men where along a continuum between male pose this means that me feel female. I did who cross-dress at one end and female at the other. In our it was the clueless are often mocked attempts to describe the transgender ex- doctor who ultimately not want to remove the and ridiculed – why perience we must include all points upon defined me as trans- would anyone want that spectrum (although many people gender by misgen- ‘me.’” to leave their male across the spectrum may not self-identify dering me at birth.) privilege at the as trans). So, in this discus- door? This is one Unfortunately, the binary notion per- sion of transgender terminology, are cross- fascinating society in which we live!) sists in a world that sees high-profile ce- dressers transgender? An initial response But here it gets really tricky. Are all men lebrities move from one end of the spec- would be to ask them. But what exactly is who “cross-dress” considered to be cross- trum to the other. a cross-dresser? The archaic word was dressers? Individuals assigned male at Cisgender reporters in the press (those transvestite, a clinical term that described birth but who identify as female and wear who are not trans and who have limited a member of one gender wearing the cloth- feminine attire are generally not consid- experience reporting on trans issues) ing of the other with the intent of presenting ered to be cross-dressers – after all, they have stumbled through the language. as that other gender. (Wearing your mom’s are wearing the clothing that matches their Even those of us in the community have coat to run out to the mailbox does not true gender feelings. struggled. A transgender conference being count.) Here again, we are venturing into In reality, one could say that a trans planned in St. Louis has adopted the title those tricky waters of the binary genders. woman (either before, during, or after tran- “Transgender Spectrum Conference” (my A cross-dresser is generally thought of as sitioning) cross dresses when she wears italics) to acknowledge that being trans- her old male clothing. But one must ask, gender is far more than merely the binary. how much does clothing really play a part Often we hear people use the com- in our true gender feelings? bined terminology of transgender and gen- Early in my transition I told my friends der-nonconforming to include the entire who were cross-dressers that I would go spectrum. It seems that the separate terms home after our monthly meetings and cry transgender and gender-nonconforming until dawn because I did not want to re- are not synonymous, especially since move all of the things that made me feel transgender was for so long exclusively female. I did not want to remove the “me.” viewed as part of the binary. They could not understand and told me In their media reference guide, the Gay they were happy to get that stuff off – and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation enough was enough! (GLAAD) stresses that not all transgen- It was fun for a while, but they were der individuals identify as gender-noncon- men and cross-dressing did not define forming, and not all gender-nonconforming their true gender. Our differences became identify as trans. So much for the grand strikingly clear, including the pronouns ... umbrella that transgender once represent- more on that next time. BALTIMORE OUTLOUD AUGUST 21, 2015 • baltimoreoutloud.com t 9 Thinking OUTloud

acrid aroma of fried tenders to confront Trump and risk the ver- foods encased in bal equivalent of a nuclear war. On the other even more fried hand, his outrageous comments can make batter. the other candidates seem less extreme and OUT They go through more adult by comparison, which is a risk for Spoken all of this but why Democrats. Steve Charing aren’t they gaining Of course, as long as Trump stays in any traction? Why the race he will cause trouble for the other are they mired in candidates. He has commanded most of the single digits like attention without question and attention is they are up to their like catnip to a guy like Trump. He’s already The Trump necks in Iowa hog proven that he can say just about anything waste? and get away with it. Though his policy posi- Card: Who The answer my tions have been scant so far, they’re likely friends is blowing to mirror those of the rest of the field whose Wins the in the wind. And differences aren’t dramatic. that wind is Donald Trump’s distinction is that he and only Trump. Donald Trump he can get the job done and “Make America Hand? Homophobe Great Again.” It’s about him as the savior, Pity those poor clowns in the GOP clown Mike Huckabee, not his particular positions on issues that car who think they can be president of the who knows what should matter. United States. They run around the coun- to do with an Iowa Fair corn dog when he wide margin. Four years ago Herman “9-9-9” One good thing about Trump is that he is try kissing the asses of fat-cat donors. sees one, is flummoxed. Trump, accord- Cain was a Republican frontrunner, as was not a demagogue on social issues like most They suck up to their bigoted, misogynous, ing to the former governor of Arkansas, Michelle Bachman at one time, before they of the other GOP hopefuls. His pro-life posi- and homophobic gun-toting, Bible-thump- is receiving “ten times the media attention” both flamed out as their idiocy caught up tion had evolved to meet the requirements ing party base. They raise tons of money so no wonder Trump is leading in the polls. with them. Will it be different in this cycle? of the GOP but he is unconvincing. While he through unfettered PACs and super PACs Huckabee claims if he enjoyed that amount “Teflon Donald” has been able to insult is for “traditional marriage,” he doesn’t of- and super-duper PACs. They attempt to of attention, he’d be winning. Right. Mexicans, John McCain’s war service, Fox fer anti-gay diatribes as most of his fellow speak to “ordinary” folks at the Iowa State It is true that Trump is ahead of this sorry News’s Megyn Kelly, and women in general contenders do. One reason for his relative Fair amid the stench of cow dung and the pack based on the latest polling and by a in short order with relative impunity; his poll- silence on the topic is that he cannot come ing numbers remain stout. The GOP pack up with a good answer to the question, how won’t stand up to him (other than tepid ap- do your three marriages represent traditional peals for him to change his tone) lest the marriage? Donald reaches from his vast arsenal of He also said on Meet the Press on Au- insults and fires verbal slingshots at them, gust 16 that being gay should not be a rea- which is more than the Democrats are will- son to fire employees of private companies. ing to do. Only Scott Walker, Jeb Bush, and George The Dems are gleefully sitting on the Pataki of the other Republican candidates sidelines enjoying the spectacle that is Don- share that view. ald Trump and hoping that Trump-mania will How long can or will Trump remain in the diminish (if that’s possible) the other GOP race is the billion dollar question. As long as contenders and deflect attention away from he’s riding high in the polls, he is not going their own flawed frontrunner. anywhere. A significant dip may cause him It’s not the correct approach. Rather than to pull out, but that doesn’t seem likely now. passively avoiding the fray and hoping upon Such decisions will have to wait for the pri- hope that Trump stays in the race to injure maries and caucuses to get underway in the the eventual nominee, Democratic strate- winter. That will be a better measuring stick gists should have been seizing on this gift- than current polling. wrapped opportunity and swing into attack He has threatened to run as an indepen- mode – a tactic that’s not natural to them. dent should he be treated as badly by the With every Trump gaffe, rather than con- GOP. That is unlikely because of the need demning the self-centered showman, Dems to gather so many signatures in all 50 states need to put out releases that say, “Trump and the added costs of doing so. is only saying what the rest of the Republi- Right now, he is riding the wave of voter can hopefuls are thinking but don’t have the anger and people are backing him no mat- courage to say for themselves.” This is not ter how absurd his comments and unrealistic a stretch; few GOP candidates respond to his positions are. They like people who call Trump on the substance of his comments, our elected officials “stupid” and will keep only to the manner in which he states them. him rolling along, so he remains a nightmare It is a win-win strategy for Democrats. for establishment Republicans. Either the electorate will tie Trump and his The longer the disarray, the better it is bluster to the GOP field if the Dems keep for the Democrats. The Trump card will help taunting or his antics will force the other con- them win the hand… for now. t

10 t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD AUGUST 21, 2015 • baltimoreoutloud.com thinking outloud

cause for over 15 years. At first I thought Never Bowl Alone it was because I’d fought so hard it was anti-climactic. But then again, perhaps it’s B Y MICHaeL THOMAS toward an end-of-season pot, which we Lesbian because I am single and can’t benefit. Yes, I began bowling at the young age of ten. use to purchase gift cards. On our final Love if I choose to marry I could now but what if Back then, I bowled between my legs. It week of bowling, another random draw is Barb Elgin I can’t find a suitable partner? What about was a start. Forty years later, I am now the done to determine who the lucky winners my rights in the meantime? Or, what if I president of the Rainbow Mixed Bowling are. The second drawing is for something don’t want to get married? Is it fair that I League in Columbia, Maryland, an LGBT we call Lucky Ball. Whoever’s ticket is Single & Proud don’t receive the same tax breaks and le- friendly bowling league. Our league has selected gets to choose from 11 cards, gal rights couples do? been in existence for roughly 20 years, of ace through ten, and a joker. Whichever As an LGBT person used to discrimina- which I have been a participant for about card is selected determines the number Every week I speak with women-who- tion – single or married – aren’t you ap- half. of pins that they must knock down. If they love-women who are navigating today’s palled? Is there even more pressure in the Bowling is a more leisurely sport, thus pull the joker, they indicate the number of world on their own, whether by choice or LGBT community to couple up than the can be as competitive or noncompetitive pins. If the bowler knocks down the cor- circumstance. Some are newly separated, straight world these days? as you wish. Some just want rect number of pins, they win the widowed, or divorced and are wondering And the bottom line for me is this one: to have fun, others want to progressive pot (accumulated how they will ever get used to living alone, How do these legal, financial and social achieve high scores. The Rainbow each week until someone knocks sleeping alone without someone beside pressures impact you, the individual? How greatest reward for me has down the number of pins match- them, how they will afford living alone or much are you negatively affected and, bet- been the many friendships Mixed ing the card). Last year, one of how they will fill their time on the weekend. ter yet: what can we as a culture do to that have been built over the Bowling the pots built up to almost $200! Other lesbian, bisexual, and transgen- take better care of our years. Commitments, even a We have a potluck before der women have been single awhile but singles? marriage – relationships that League in we go on break at the end of they are still struggling with Let me give you one go beyond the bowling alley. the year for Christmas and New issues such as loneliness, last example of singlism I’ve been on trips to Vegas Columbia Year’s, as well as on our final shame, a sense of failure due in our culture: If you with my bowling buddies, night of bowling in the spring. Ev- to their divorce or breakup, are coupled, have you and over the summer when welcomes all eryone brings their favorite dish, and more. Some have been felt pity for a single we aren’t bowling, some of a change of pace from the usual dating but haven’t found love friend? Have you felt us get together every few weeks and play bowling-alley food. We also have a nine- again. Some – even in large cit- irritated when your poker. It’s a great avenue for socializing pin no tap tournament to end our year. If ies – have become frustrated with single friend says and meeting people. you knock down nine pins, it becomes a dating and/or the dating scene. they are “too busy” We’re an LGBT-friendly league. Every- strike. The top bowlers win monetary priz- Some have even given up, includ- to spend time with one is welcome to join. We’ve had occa- es. ing some bisexual women going you? Do you have sions where people have joined and didn’t Our league begins Thursday, Sep- back to dating men. I talk to kind, the thought “Why is he know it was an LGBT-friendly league. They tember 3rd, at 7 p.m., and we bowl ev- successful, lovely lesbians 40 and up #1or she so busy – they’re single – bowled with us, and learned that we are ery Thursday going forward (except holi- just about every week who can’t find what do they have to do?” fun, loving people. One couple even com- days) at Columbia Brunswick Lanes (7100 compatible women to date, let alone build So, before you continue thinking this mented that we are so much more fun and Carved Stone, Columbia, Maryland). t a relationship with, and there are plenty of way, let me give you some introductory friendly than the other leagues. They loved Want to join? Contact the author for singles who aren’t interested in dating and thoughts on why we need to take better our league so much that they are now re- more info-- [email protected]. wonder if that means something is wrong care of singles: Singles often have much turning for their fourth year! I would like with them. So many of us are still waiting less time, energy, and resources than mar- to think that our league has helped gain for Princess Charming, the fault of our cul- ried people because it’s all on them: the ground in our fight for equality. tural conditioning. bread-winning, the meal preparations, the To add a little more fun to the mix, we Are singles settling? Could singles gar- shopping, the yard work, the bills, etc.. have two drawings each week. One is a ner more support for themselves? Is the Couples share all of these daily stresses 50/50 – 50% of the funds go to the bowler proverbial deck “stacked against singles” and thus tend to have more time, energy, whose ticket is pulled, the other 50% goes in today’s world and should society do and resources from which to work with in more to right things in singles’ favor? Af- their lives. These are practical facts. It’s ter all, don’t we think of ourselves as “less even tougher when the single is a parent, than” the couple next door? Why is it that or is caring for a parent or other loved one. so many of us believe we are nothing with- Stay tuned for part 2. t out a relationship? Do we suffer from in- Barb Elgin has been helping lesbians ternalized “singlism,” and, if so, why don’t thrive since the mid-1980s as a psycho- we stop and stay single long enough – by therapist, life/love coach, matchmaker, choice – to explore this “pregnant with author, radio-show host and more. Her possibility” life station instead of running current focus is the Lasting Lesbian Love to hide in any relationship, just to avoid be- Social / Travel Club. If you’re ready to un- ing alone? wind, unplug, and become healthier and Perhaps all of this explains why I wasn’t happier, while having fun and meeting jumping with utter joy like so many at the other like-hearted LBT women, sign up for recent legalization of gay marriage across L3’s complimentary Social/Travel E-Zine the land. Sour grapes, moi!?! How is that at Lastinglesbianlove.com/lesbian-social- so? After all I have been an activist for that and-travel-with-heart. BALTIMORE OUTLOUD AUGUST 21, 2015 • baltimoreoutloud.com t 11 Thinking OUTloud Gay Cruising Stings in 2015? “to rid the family-orient- ed park of the illegal ele- Yes, They’re Still Happening ment” and “site for illegal acts in the underground b y Andrew Extein & David Booth engage in sexual activity. Criminal guilt by community of sexual Believe it or not, gay cruising stings still association to a presumption of sex is not solicitation.” Apparently, happen. The Washington Blade reports what the gay rights movement should toler- law enforcement thinks that just last month 12 men were arrested ate in the era of gay marriage and equality. queers are seedy, inher- in a park near Rehoboth Beach, Delaware, The sting at Rehoboth Beach isn’t ently criminal and inhu- a once-popular gay vacation spot, on mul- alone. There have been a number of recent mane creatures waiting tiple criminal violations including offensive cases of law enforcement targeting gay in the leafy confines of touching, criminal solicitation, lewdness, men for alleged cruising. Over a one year a public park to spring indecent exposure and loitering to engage span from April 2012 to May 2013, 18 men on unsuspecting fami- in or solicit sex. Young were arrested lies. They also coldly undercover officers pre- “Stings such as the for exposing acknowledge that gay tended to be cruising for their genitalia men who cruise are de- sex in order to make ar- one at Rehoboth in a park bath- serving of entry into the rests with the intent to Beach signal a war room in Florida. harsh criminal justice W olfe Neck at Cape Henlopen State Park, Rehoboth, Beach: curb the same-sex activi- In June 2013, system, as one sherriff Beware of things that sting ties at this particular spot. on sex that fuels mass 10 men were states: “We’re going to Officials claim to nabbed for “de- make sure that this element understands posing as minors and initiating sexual con- have received complaints incarceration, similar viant sexual that if you come…to this beautiful park that versations. In the eyes of law enforcement, about the sexual conduct to the war on drugs. activity” at local the person you’re trying to solicit or engage queer people are fair game for harassment, in this part of the park. parks in Ala- in sexual activity with may be an under- violence, and persecution. Parks and Recreation While drug laws are bama, which is cover officer. And if so, you’re going to be Stings such as the one at Rehoboth Natural Resources Po- code for same- arrested.” Beach signal a war on sex that fuels mass lice Chief Wayne Kline being repealed, sex sex sexual ac- How have we allowed this to happen? incarceration, similar to the war on drugs. says that “this operation laws are exponentially tivity according The recent focus on activism around gay While drug laws are being repealed, sex is a response to a seri- to Alabama law. marriage and military inclusion erases is- laws are exponentially growing. Sex of- ous and longstanding growing. Sex-offender Only one of the sues such as homophobic policing. Cruis- fender registries have bloated to 800,000 problem with lewd and in- men was previ- ing stings aren’t the only way queer people people and counting. Just recently a Florida decent public behavior… registries have bloated ously arrested are being targeted today. Trans women, es- couple was arrested for allegedly having sex Such behavior will not be to 800,000 people and for loitering. pecially trans women of color, are policed on a public beach, resulting in a two-and-a- tolerated in a public area Law enforce- at incredibly high rates. Michael Johnson, half year prison sentence for the man and within a Delaware State counting.” ment in Lincoln, a young black gay man, was recently sen- lifetime sex offender registration for both of Park.” Rhode Island tenced to 30-½ years in prison for having them. If we don’t address the expansion of Potential penalties arrested five unprotected sex. One gay man in Staten Is- laws policing sex, then we can’t expect to re- for these misdemeanor men for alleged land was just beaten and called a faggot by form the criminal justice system. Sex stings, crimes include a year of jail time and a lewd conduct back in May 2014. Law en- homophobic officers in an especially violent sex offender registries, and queer policing fine of a few thousand dollars. Two arrests forcement in Ohio arrested six men for illicit attack. Sex workers and their clients are ar- are part and parcel with a violent system of within three years could also lead to life- sexual activity in June 2014. Other wooded rested in prostitution stings. Queer youth mass incarceration that affects everyone. t time registration as a sex offender. spots in Delaware have also been targeted. are prosecuted for consensual sex at rates Andrew Extein is head of the Center for The men range in age between 49 In March of this year, two men were arrest- higher than their straight counterparts. Po- Sexual Justice, which fights government and 82, a demographic less inclined to ed for allegedly soliciting sex at Massey’s lice use gay apps and sites such as Grindr stings and sex-offender registries. Learn use online cruising apps such as Grindr, Landing. Four months later an additional and Adam4Adam to entrap gay men by more at Centerforsexualjustice.org and more likely to visit old-school cruising two men were arrested at Redden State grounds such as the ones they were ar- Park. rested in. Local news sites have publicly These incidences do not include what listed the full names, ages, and charges of we have previously reported: In 2007, 40 each of the 12 arrested men. men were caught in Johnson City, Tennes- The gay community should be ex- see. Another 500 men were stung over a tremely troubled that this type of gay cruis- period of five years, from 2002 to 2007, in ing sting is allowed to happen. While some the Salt Lake City area. In 2008, 24 men might argue that public sex is distasteful were netted in Huntsville, Alabama, and an and should be eliminated, gay men should additional 19 men in Palm Springs the fol- be disturbed that they are being singled out lowing year. With arrests in the double dig- as a criminal class in need of policing and its, 2011 was a banner year for Kent County containment. These stings don’t happen (Michigan) and Kansas City. The list is on- to heterosexuals; this is very specifically going. a tactic that targets gay men. The stings The language used to describe at least don’t even target gay sex necessarily, as one of these stings is troubling commentary merely being around the cruising spot is on the existing gay bias in law enforcement. criminalized as “loitering” with “intent” to Per law enforcement in Springfield, Ohio: 12 t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD AUGUST 21, 2015 • baltimoreoutloud.com BALTIMORE OUTLOUD AUGUST 21, 2015 • baltimoreoutloud.com t 13 Lively Arts // out on screen The Man From U.N.C.L.E. is a Blast to the Past b y Chuck Duncan works as a mechanic. Her father escaped From U.N.C.L.E. and update it to the pres- nitpick with his character is the unexplained With all the reboots, remakes and re-imag- to the U.S. and was helping with the bomb ent, stuffing the story with news ripped from super strength he seems to have). Solo inings hitting cinema screens nowadays, program, but he has vanished and both sides the headlines to make it current. Kudos to and Kuryakin have a doozy of a fight before it’s nice to see someone take a look at a TV fear he is once again working with a neo-Nazi him and everyone involved for keeping the they’re forced to team up, but after that the show that had its heyday at the end of the group to develop a nuclear bomb. only battle waged is among the audience de- Swinging Sixties, The Man From U.N.C.L.E., What Solo and Kuryakin don’t ex- 1960s rendered ciding which one is more handsome (I call it serving up not only a spinoff (The Girl From pect is the truce between their picture- a draw). U.N.C.L.E.) but several feature films (actually countries that then forces them to perfect Vikander does a nice job of playing tough TV episodes with newly filmed footage to add work together with Gaby. but innocent, but Debicki is perfectly cast as more sex and violence) and a TV movie re- Kuryakin and Gaby pose as a 1960s femme fatale. She has the look, the union in 1985. a newly engaged couple to lure style, like she was just ripped out of a 60s Since then, The Man From U.N.C.L.E. her uncle out of hiding so as to spy movie and plunked down into this one. has developed a loyal, cultish following due get information about her father’s It’s hard to take your eyes off of her when- to its not being shown much in syndica- whereabouts. Solo poses as a ever she’s on screen. The rest of the cast is tion and only arriving on DVD in 2007. The businessman/thief who makes an also top notch and it’s nice to see Hugh Grant original series was certainly a result of the offer to acquire certain objects for show up late in the game to really throw popularity at the time of a silver-screen super Italian magnate Victoria Vinciguer- some curve balls at the spies. spy (who did get a little nod in the reunion ra (Elizabeth Debicki), who has It’s interesting to see the decidedly mixed movie), and the new film owes as much to ties to Gaby’s uncle, but she may reviews for the film. I thought it was a terrific early James Bond as it does to the original not be exactly who she seems. For throwback to that era, but perhaps the trailer TV series. that matter, no one may actually be who they story so firmly grounded in the 1960s. Not has been a bit misleading by portraying the The Man From U.N.C.L.E. starts out seem. Gaby’s father is eventually located, only does it allow audiences a bit of escap- film as non-stop action with a lot of winking guns ablazing as U.S. agent Napoleon Solo and he has indeed been forced to build a ism into another era, but it makes for a visu- humor, almost as a spoof of the original se- (Henry Cavill) and Russian agent Illya Kurya- bomb, and Solo and Kuryakin have to figure ally sumptuous film as well from the stunning ries. It’s definitely not that. There are a few kin (Armie Hammer) are tasked with remov- out how to retrieve it before it gets used. 60s fashions (all designer, of course) to the action sequences – and the final car / ATV ing Gaby Teller (Alicia Vikander) from the It could have been very easy for director production and set design, hair and makeup, / motorcycle chase is stunning – and even eastern side of the Berlin Wall, where she Guy Ritchie to take the premise of The Man and musical score. Everything is so stylisti- fewer funny lines. cally pitch perfect, you could almost mistake The film actually takes its time building it for a film from that era. the story instead of hammering the viewer Casting-wise, it’s interesting to have Brit over the head with pyrotechnics. Perhaps Cavill playing the U.S. spy with Yank Ham- some of the critics with short attention spans mer playing the Russian, but they both do aren’t able to handle an action movie that ac- a terrific job. Cavill, who is rumored to have tually has a story, but I found it to be enthrall- had a hard time maintaining the American ac- ing from beginning to end. cent, does speak in a slightly stylized, stilted The film ends with an obvious set-up for manner but it suits the character (and makes more (hint: Solo and Kuryakin aren’t even the case for Cavill to play a live action ver- U.N.C.L.E. agents until the very last sec- sion of the animated Archer). But his Solo is onds of the movie!), and I, for one, am more intelligent and can handle himself in hand-to- than eager for a second helping. Will Ritchie hand combat with ease. Hammer also does stick with the series and perhaps bring back a good job with his Russian accent (maybe U.N.C.L.E.’s TV nemesis T.H.R.U.S.H.? The a little too Boris and Natasha, but it’s fine), only way that will happen is if people see the and can put together an outfit just as easily movie, so take it from this movie fan – give as he can pummel someone. (The only real The Man From U.N.C.L.E. a shot! t

14 t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD AUGUST 21, 2015 • baltimoreoutloud.com Live ly Arts // QMusic // between the book covers Dance If You Want To Baltimore Gay History in Photos LGBT Baltimore by that contains photos and By Gregg Shapiro The Simian Mobile Disco that you hear Louise Parker Kelley captions depicting the Everyone wants to be Avicii. Even estab- on 2014’s Whorl (Anti-) is a long way from (Arcadia Publishing, fight for LGBT rights and lished dance artists such as David Guetta the throbbing and thumping dance act you 96 pages, softcover, showcases those who and Calvin Harris. Unfortunately, both may be familiar with from its dynamic 2007 $22.99). stood on the frontlines. Guetta and Harris’s new albums come debut album Attack Decay Sustain Re- Browsing through the For those of us who up short when compared to the incredible lease. Whorl’s opening tracks, “Redshift” new pictorial history have lived through part success of Avicii’s True disc, or Disclo- and “Dandelion Spheres,” aren’t just chill, book, LGBT Baltimore, or all of the history of the sure’s Settle, for that matter. Of the two, they’re catatonic. Even when the beats ar- just released on August struggle for LGBT equali- it’s French DJ Guetta who catches our ear rive, as they do on “Sun Dogs,” “Hypnick 17, you will see a float ty in Baltimore during this with Listen (Atlantic / Parlophone), while Jerk,” and “Jam Side Up,” they’re lacklus- from a 1990 Pride pa- period will wax nostal- Harris doesn’t move us with Motion. ter The saving graces of the disc occur rade. You will notice a gic at these photos and As if to prove there’s more to what he on whirling “Dervish,” as well as “Calyx,” black-and-white shot of recall some of the local does than just make dance music, Guetta which is reminiscent of vintage 808 State. the Names Project AIDS leaders who led the fight. opens his disc with the safe rock num- Veering dangerously close to being Memorial Quilt on display Among the heroes pic- ber “Dangerous.” When he gets back into corporate club music as it does on “The at the Baltimore Museum tured besides Schwartz dance mode he earns our attention on Future,” Forever (WB), the debut album by of Art in 1988. And there are Elliott Brager, Lynda “What I Did for Love” (not to be confused Mystery Skulls redeems itself a few times. is a color photo of Harvey Dee, Ann Gordon, Jim with the song from A Chorus Line) with vo- The grindy “Hellbent” featuring Snowblood Schwartz, the Community Becker, Mardie Walker, cals by Emeli Sandé, the vaguely dance- crackles like the flames of the underworld. Center’s first executive and Steve Shavitz. hall “No Money No Love” featuring Elliph- “Ghost” is haunted by Prince while “Magic” director and a founder Available at local ant & Ms. Dynamite, the John Legend title (featuring Nile Rogers and Brandy) chicly of the Center’s Chase retailers, online book- track and “Bang casts a spell on Street building, sitting behind his desk on stores, or through Arcadia Publishing and My Head” with the the dance floor. the phone. These and 150 other images are The History Press at Arcadiapublishing.com ubiquitous Sia. On #Newgore- contained in this chronicle of LGBT history in or 888-313-2665. t Like “Lovers order (Buygore / Baltimore spanning five decades. Go to Baltimoreoutloud.com for the full on the Sun” from Dim Mak), Israeli Longtime LGBT activist Louise Parker review. the Guetta disc, EDM act Borgore Kelley authored the soft-cover 96-page book – Steve Charing “Faith,” which is like an unre- opens the Har- strained Mys- ris disc, sounds tery Skulls. The like an imitation soundtrack to a of Avicii’s “Wake strip club (gay or Me Up.” Harris straight), com- momentarily re- plete with chain- deems himself saw synths and with “Under Con- smutty lyrics, as trol” with Alesso in “Syrup,” these and Hurts. Ellie songs are so Goulding, almost nasty they should as omnipresent as come with a home Sia, can be heard STD testing kit. on “Outside.” Per- Still, you have to haps the one place where Harris trumps admit that Borgore knows some cool folks, Guetta is on the dance rock track “Pray calling on Malcolm McDowell to speak dur- to God,” featuring the amazing sister act ing the titular cut and Miley Cyrus to duet Haim. with him on the jagged “Decisions.” Full-tilt In case you hadn’t heard, Röyksopp, dance-floor workout can be found on “Piña- Robyn’s Norwegian neighbors and fre- ta,” “Be Ourselves,” and the Pretty Remix quent collaborators, has released its final of “Fame.” album in the traditional format – The Inevi- You’ll have to get through (or skip) the table End (Cherrytree / Interscope). Com- first track, “Animal,” and almost half of the ing on the heels of the spring 2014 EP Do It second one, “Veda,” before you discover Again, with Robyn, the double-disc set fea- what the trio known as The Acid can do with tures new versions of “Monument” and “Do a dance beat on its album Liminal (Mute). It Again,” both of which originally appeared From the stripped down blips of “Creeper” on the EP. Less about dancing and more to the gorgeous choral energy of “Fame” about setting a mood for chilling (check out and the spooky “Ghost,” The Acid guides “You Know I Have to Go”), Röyksopp still listeners on a trip worth taking. t knows how to make us move (“I Had This Mystery Skulls performs on August 23 in Thing,” “Running to the Sea”), and we can’t Baltimore at the Metro Gallery, and on Au- thank them enough for that. gust 25 in Philadelphia at Ortlieb’s Lounge.

BALTIMORE OUTLOUD AUGUST 21, 2015 • baltimoreoutloud.com t 15 Lively Arts // outstyle Losing My Mind at the Paint

By Rick Aronhalt over. Give them a Architectural Digest is mocking me. August few glasses of Counter is their color issue. And for someone with a wine so that you’ll color deficiency, this issue is both friend and get their honest opinions. Preferably Marsala. nemesis. 2) Go to builder’s open-houses. Build- The beauty of this issue is that it show- ers hire designers and staging professionals cases exquisitely planned interiors with color to make their properties sparkle. Each room that not only pops, but is in perfect harmo- is filled with the latest trends in paint and fab- ny with its surroundings. The bad thing ric colors. Snap photos and steal their good about this issue is that it reveals one of ideas. If you see a paint color you my shortcomings: I can’t pick a decent can’t live without, just ask color to save my life. First, there was the sales rep. You the dining room in my old house that might get lucky and I painted a blue so royal that it could walk out with the have been a playroom on a Disney color you need. Cruise. Now there is my current 3) Look in the trying-to-find-a-neutral-gray-one- mail. Magazines do wasted-gallon-of-paint-at-a-time all the heavy lifting. debacle. Even my hair color nev- Not only will you find ar- er turns out the way it looks on ticles on color trends, but the box. you’ll see advertisements So this month’s fixation on with beautifully decorated color got me to thinking about rooms to give you inspira- who makes the big color tion. Don’t toss your cata- decisions and influences N ot some ruse, logs. Even if you don’t shop trends for the coming years. but hues you at IKEA or Crate and Barrel A big player in this arena is can use! pay attention to how they’ve Pantone. Well-known in the designed the photo spreads. graphic arts community, this company These companies have stud- developed the Pantone Matching System ied the trends and know what’s that has helped designers uphold color stan- coming out before anyone else. 4) Use dards when creating everything from logos a single color for small spaces. If you have to advertisements to product labels. Over a small home, make it look bigger by paint- the years, Pantone has gained such influ- ing all of the walls and the hallways in the ence in the color world that it now chooses same paint color. Consistent color tricks the the color of the year that will permeate the eye into extending beyond the confines of the design world and affect everything from next room, thereby, making the room look larger. season’s socks to your iPhone cover to appli- 5) Look up. Don’t forget the ceiling, aka ances at Target. the fifth wall. Benjamin Moore’s website rec- In case you’re wondering, 2015’s color ommends going darker on the ceiling in a of the year is Marsala. Yes, the color of that large room and lighter with less of a contrast delightful fortified red wine. And this summer, in a small room. Visit Benjaminmoore.com for Pantone released its first-ever color based on more tips and photos. a cartoon character. You probably guessed it 6) The higher the gloss the more vis- already: Minion Yellow. ible the imperfections. If you live in a home So, with all the color choices and all the with old plaster walls, stick to flat or eggshell. opportunities to make bad decisions (like I I prefer eggshell because it is washable; flat have), how can you achieve color bliss when is not. Any higher sheen than eggshell and painting your home? Here are a few tips: the light will draw your eye to every sad 1) Never buy a gallon of paint on your first spackle job on the wall. Not pretty. visit. Ever. Find the color you like and go And a final word: Please, please buy good one or two shades lighter if you are painting paintbrushes and rollers. Seriously. Think a wall surface. Then purchase a $3 sample. about the time and money you’ll spend and This tiny jar will paint a five-foot-by-five-foot the stiff neck you’ll likely have after painting square – enough for you to tell if the color is your interior. Make it worth it by using good going to work. Don’t do your test paint job on tools that will help you achieve a flawless fin- a wall with windows; the glare from the sun- ish regardless of the color you choose. t light will not allow you to gauge the paint color Rick Aronhalt is a writer and owner of properly. Find a wall across the room from the Retrorurn, a mid-century modern furniture windows to paint your test spot. Then live with and home décor store in Hampden. He may the color for one week and have some friends be reached at [email protected].

16 t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD AUGUST 21, 2015 • baltimoreoutloud.com The Weekend Traveler Our Sister City to the North

By Eric Vooys area. Cover is only $5 to An advantage that every get to the top two floors. Baltimorean has is that I wouldn’t go again and we are practically neigh- not pay the small cover, bors to a city in which this it’s definitely worth it. Eye nation’s Constitution and Candy was home to a Bill of Rights was written good mix of people – there and signed – Philadel- was both a large gay male phia, Pennsylvania. Philly and female population is significantly bigger than with some female danc- Baltimore and has a lot to ers and servers. It was offer anyone who takes a nice to see the mixture. day-trip or a long week- We also made our way to end visit. a bar called the Bike Stop We started our get-a- that deserves the label of way with a walk down to a leather bar. The down- Independence Hall, where stairs lighting was very the Constitution was writ- dim, which appropriately ten and signed. We didn’t set the mood for the type go into the building, but of bar it was, but it was a it was still a great expe- fun atmosphere. It’s not for rience to simply walk by. everyone, but they have I saw may people in big a pool table on the main groups taking pictures floor and the people were and I felt very fortunate Plenty’s afoot in nice. to live so close to such a Philly The next day we woke monumental building and up and took a lovely stroll city. Around the corner to the Rittenhouse Square we were able to visit what was left and a area where we decided to check out the Mut- partial recreation of the house that George ter Museum, which consisted of medical oddi- Washington lived in before making his way ties from years past. It was very interesting, to to what is now the nation’s capital, Wash- say the least, decently priced, and very edu- ington, D.C. There were interactive vid- cational. It was a little cramped, but definately eos that talked about the monument itself worth the entrance fee. Once we finished and a little bit of Washington’s life while in with the museum we found the market on the Philly. This lead us directly to the building square, purchased a cold Popsicle on the in which the famous Liberty Bell is housed. hot day and decided to grab a bite to eat It was not overly exciting, but I think it’s and a cocktail at a place called Parc. It’s a one of those things that you just have to do French-style Bistro that had outside seat- for the experience. ing, good food and good drinks. I would Next, we paid a $5 admission to enter the recommend grabbing a nice and refresh- Benjamin Franklin Museum. I have to admit, ing drink called the Basilic, you can’t go some of the information and the interactive wrong. displays were fun and very interesting – defi- We left Parc with a full belly, walked nitely worth the $5 to learn a little bit about through some shops in Chinatown, and one of our founding fathers. made our way to the Duck Tours to ride Philly is very “walker-friendly” and we only a vehicle that can operate on land and in used Uber once to get to south Philly for din- water. Paying $30 a piece was a little ex- ner on Saturday. Other than that, we walked pensive, but it was nice to have a guided everywhere. Rittenhouse Square is absolute- tour by both land and sea. I think everyone ly beautiful at both night and in the day. We must try it at least once. were able to check out a lot of the beautiful, We ended our night at Woody’s, paid detailed architecture that the city is home to the $10 cover to go upstairs to check out by simply walking, not driving, because you the three dance floors and enjoyed the la- miss so much when you travel by car. ser and light show. Maybe I’m just getting a That night we checked out a couple dif- littler older, but a couple years ago, I would ferent places to see what the nightlife had to have had the time of my life there. provide. Eye Candy has three floors that all Sunday was lazy and relaxing. We left feel like completely different establishments the city, but took with us some great memo- as you climb the stairs to the top floor, which ries and headed back to Baltimore to think consists of an open, outside bar and lounge of where our next adventure will be. t

BALTIMORE OUTLOUD AUGUST 21, 2015 • baltimoreoutloud.com t 17 Quality of Life

eat. She loves her dog food, will steal a pota- the yard with one of her favorite stuffed toys. the bond and the commitment he felt toward to right out of the pantry, and being so close Violet’s opinion was that the toy should be- his four-legged friends and loved every min- to the ground, will grab any people-food that long to her and not Daisy. Daisy is a sweet, ute of it. When he went to college, he studied drops to the floor before the taller dogs ever lovable, and mostly docile dog, but when it animal science and continued working in vet- Violet’s have a chance. comes to her toys, she can be very protec- erinary hospitals. He had grown from a ken- Unfortunately, her love of eating is not tive. When a disagreement occurs between nel assistant to a veterinary technician. He Vet limited to food. She loves paper, pencils, a 16-pound dog like Violet, and a 65-pound worked hard and learned the science of ani- Dr. Tony Calo bottles, slug bait, and anything in a tube. dog like Daisy, the outcome is another trip to mals. At work, he learned the practical side Her love of tubes was revealed just a few the veterinarian’s office for Violet. of veterinary medicine. Mostly he learned days after she came to live with Tony, when These events began Violet’s close rela- exactly how the important the human-animal Violet and My she was 11 months old. The entire family tionship with veterinary medicine. It is only bond was and is to him. He learned to con- was relaxing: Tony reading quietly in bed, natural that Violet came to know a lot about nect with every animal that he met. Violet Human, the the dogs sleeping peacefully on the floor. her veterinarian, as they have spent a lot of loved knowing how devoted he was to her Then Tony heard an unusual slurping sound time together. Her favorite story about him is and to all of his other patients. It made her Veterinarian coming from foot of the bed. He looked over the one about why he wanted to become an happy knowing she was in his caring hands. and found Violet covered from head to toe in animal doctor. She learned that as a small It also makes her happy knowing that she Violet is a four-year-old French bulldog. She paint. She had quietly snuck from the bed- child, his mother often took him to the mov- doesn’t see him only when she is sick. She has a great life in Baltimore. She lives with room, walked down the hall to the art studio ies. One of these movies was 101 Dalma- gets to see him every day and every night her best friends Daisy, a ten-year-old Lab- where she found a tube of very expensive tians. It was a movie about saving puppies. because Violet’s vet is not just her doctor, he rador retriever, and Henry, a two-year-old oil paint. Violet brought the paint back to the It was a movie that changed his life. It was is also her human dad. shepherd mix. They all live with their best bedroom and proceeded to dig in. By the at that movie he fell in love with dogs. Leav- Violet wants to share her world with you human friend, Tony. Violet has a huge per- time she was discovered she had consumed ing the theater that day, he told his mom, so she has decided to let her veterinarian sonality for such a little dog. She has strong half of the tube. Violet had many colors to “I am going to take care of animals when I (and her dad) help others in need. Please opinions that she is more than willing to choose from in the studio, but she picked grow up.” His puppy love grew into a lifelong send her any questions or topics related to share, is quick with a joke, and is always the one called “Windsor Violet.” Needless to say, passion and commitment to help all animals pets or animals to her and she will forwards life of the party. she required a trip to the veterinarian’s of- both individually and as a whole. them to her dad. She will also answer any She is also full of love. She will comfort fice. Violet’s paint-eating resulted in a very He got his first job in a veterinarian’s of- questions that you have about her or her ad- you if you’re stressed or sad, play with you upset stomach and four days of purple poop. fice when he was 16 years old. He would ventures. She looks forward to hearing from if you’re happy, and snuggle up for a nap if Violet recovered, and soon after that, walk dogs, clean, cages, and do laundry. He each and every one of you. t you’re tired. Violet’s strong opinions started to come out. learned as much as he could about how to Email your questions to violetsvet@balti- Another thing about Violet is she likes to Her best friend Daisy was happily playing in take care of dogs and cats. He strengthened moreoutloud.com.

18 t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD AUGUST 21, 2015 • baltimoreoutloud.com quality of life

that carries a high risk of personal liability. A little background: Before marriage in and defend themselves, that they were equality came to Maryland, couples who not hearing what the other said at all. Is it owned a house jointly usually titled the a wonder it all ended up with both of them The Law property as “joint tenants with right of sur- Ask more angry and of course, no resolution to vivorship.” Under this form of ownership, the conflict? & You the house would transfer to the survivor if Dr. J If this happens in your life, stop and Lee Carpenter one partner should die, but there would be Janan Broadbent, Ph.D. think: What gets in the way of me hearing no protection from creditors. what my partner says? Why is it more im- When two people who are already mar- portant to defend myself? What does that ried buy a house, the form of ownership is say about the relationship if we both feel How to Protect presumed to be tenants by the entirety un- and attacked? If I love this person, why do I less the deed states otherwise. As a con- Zen Now think he/she would attack me? Why does sequence, most married straight couples Your House Are you present to your partner? When we he/she think I attack if love exists? These are already taking advantage of this legal were infants and toddlers, we were pres- are questions only you, or your partner can benefit without even realizing it. from Creditors ent only to ourselves. If we were hungry, Because the right to same-sex mar- answer. Do you feel attacked in general? we cried. If we had to pee or poop, we let riage is still new, most gay and lesbian Then the issue has to do with your world- With same-sex marriage now legal across couples purchased their houses as joint go. If we wanted some object, we pointed view of what people are like. It also has to the country, we’ve been hearing a lot late- tenants with right of survivorship. Upon to it expecting it to be delivered. Our wants do with how secure you feel in your ability ly about the “benefits of marriage.” For exchanging wedding bands, they are not and needs ruled our world. Then, those to deal with others and with conflict. most of us, these benefits are personal. automatically upgraded to the higher form people around us – parents, caretakers, Most people do not seek or like con- We know that we are part of a team, that of ownership and must record a new deed and even other kids – started to object to flict. Some have had the fortune to learn someone will be there for us in a crisis, to the property in order to receive full ben- the world acting on our whims. We were dealing with it in a constructive way. That and that Sunday afternoons need never be efits. told to wait to do what we wanted to do. can indeed happen as we grow up in our spent alone. Preparing a new deed is a simple mat- We were told to listen, dammit! Depending families. But marriage also confers hundreds of ter of calling a lawyer who practices in this on how dysfunctional the environment may But more often than not, we learn the legal benefits, and the Supreme Court’s area. The signed and notarized deed must have been, there were consequences to better ways through educating ourselves decision in Obergefell v. Hodges ensures be filed with the land records office for the ignoring the world around us. Those con- through self-help books, videos, or thera- that they now ap- county the cou- sequences could be serious or minor. py. However, learn we must, if we want to ply to gay and ple lives in. This is the process by which we learned have a happy and productive life. straight couples It may also “socialization.” It is also the process Just take a look at all the nasty and alike. Couples be necessary through which we developed an under- cruel comments trolls post on social me- who tie the knot to obtain a lien standing of the world as either a trustwor- dia when they disagree with an issue or a can avoid testify- certificate and thy or a dangerous place, depending on statement. Yikes! You can almost feel the ing against each pay any taxes how well our needs were met. The issue of anger and resentment in the air. other in court, or other out- trust is crucial to the development of per- Being present in a relationship does can roll over a re- standing obli- sonality but that will be a subject for an- not come easy and takes effort. That effort tirement account gations before other day. is at the heart of the work you have to put when one spouse the deed can be Although I am simplifying the complex in if you care about your partner. It starts dies, and enjoy recorded. There process of growing up, what I want to get with listening to what was said, perhaps re- preferential treat- should be no to is how we learn to hear and be present peating it to make sure you heard it right. ment from Social transfer or re- to other people. It involves at times reminding yourself that Security, immi- cordation taxes Recently, I listened to a couple argu- this is your beloved and maybe you should to pay, but there gration, and the ing over who started a verbal altercation. both chill for a while and then go back to is a nominal re- military. First of all, you may wonder why it mat- the discussion with a cooler head, that this cording fee. One benefit that often goes over- ters who started it. These are adults, not is not a matter of enemy camps. Like a joint tenancy, a house titled as looked, however, is the right to protect the kindergarteners. That aside, they were so Because if it is, then what are you do- tenants by the entirety will pass to the sur- family home from certain types of credi- involved in saying what they wanted to get ing in this relationship? t vivor if one spouse dies. What it won’t do tors. Titling the house as “tenants by the is protect the property from a joint creditor. entirety” will prevent someone who suc- For example, if the couple co-signed a loan cessfully sues either spouse from seizing and then defaulted, the house could be in the property to pay off the judgment. In ad- jeopardy. And the IRS, not surprisingly, dition, if either spouse files for bankruptcy, can put a lien on the property regardless of the property will be beyond the reach of whether a delinquency is joint or separate. creditors. One of the primary benefits of marriage Only a married couple can title their is the sense of security that comes from house as tenants by the entirety, and this being in a committed relationship. While form of ownership can make a world of dif- it’s far from romantic, retitling the family ference to those who take advantage of it. home as tenants by the entirety can help It offers an extra measure of protection in a married couple feel even more secure. t case a homeowner becomes the target of Lee Carpenter (410-576-4729 or lcarpen- a lawsuit, defaults on a loan, or needs to [email protected]) is an associate attorney declare bankruptcy. It can be especially at the law firm Semmes, Bowen & Semmes important to doctors, lawyers, architects, (Mdlgbtestateplanning.com). This article of- and engineers – anyone in a profession fers general info, not specific legal advice. BALTIMORE OUTLOUD AUGUST 21, 2015 • baltimoreoutloud.com t 19 20 t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD AUGUST 21, 2015 • baltimoreoutloud.com d ining out

these women, and our food order with Cafe Market Salad ($9.50), Chef Salad Patience the “Lilith Fair” music pays off! the kitchen. I sup- ($10.50), Spinach Salad ($9.50), Grilled playing in the back- pose in the scheme Caesar Salad ($9), Mixed Berry Salad ground, it was not too of things, there are ($9.50), Warm Baked Brie Salad ($10.50), Finger’s easy to carry on a qui- worse things in and a Cafe Green Salad, with options of Food et conversation. life that can hap- topping with Crab Cake, Salmon, Chicken We sat for almost pen. With this at- Salad, or Veggie Burger. 20 minutes before our titude, we chalked Besides the Cafe Panini and the Ribeye waitress brought over it up as a mistake, Steak Sandwich, there are other sandwich Cafe Azafran drinks, and surpris- and moved on. Fi- selections. Some of the standouts include 18 Baltimore Avenue ingly, they were not nally, our meals a Gourmet Grilled Cheese ($8), with brie, Rehoboth Beach, Delaware ours. Once the error did arrive. Both goat cheese, provolone, and tapenade on 302-227-8100 was discovered, we sandwiches were Italian bread. Then there’s the Muffaletta Cafeazafran.com were then brought quite delicious, and Sandwich ($9), with marinated green olive over our iced-teas. Fi- worth the wait. At salad, salami, ham, manchego, on cia- by Richard Finger nally, our lunch orders the same time our batta. For vegetarians, there’s the Mediter- Tucked away on Baltimore Avenue lies were taken. I decided sandwiches arrived, ranean Wrap ($8), with hummus, cucum- the unassuming Cafe Azafran. We visited on the Cafe Panini Worth the four boisterous ber, tomato, peppers, olives, greens, herb for lunch on a lazy afternoon during our ($9), which consists the wait young women left sauce, on a tortilla wrap. week-long vacation. The cafe has about of serrano ham, rom- the restaurant, and Although our dining experience was a dozen or so tables, some of which are seco, fresh mozzarel- things were looking less than optimal, I would still recommend prime window seating with fantastic views. la, asparagus, and basil on Italian bread. up! We were able to enjoy the food and giving Cafe Azafran a chance. We have When we visited, only half the restaurant Nick selected the Ribeye Steak Sandwich actually hear ourselves think. some friends with a home in Rehoboth, and was occupied. We were quickly seated at ($13), mushroom & onion sauce, man- Cafe Azafran serves lunch daily from they visit often and recommend the restau- a table for two, and within moments asked chego, on ciabatta bread. Once again, an- noon to 3 p.m. Among the lunch offer- rant. It should be noted that the restaurant for our drink orders. For a half-filled room, other 20 minutes went by, and our waitress ings, some of the selections that stand out manager did comp one of our meals, real- the noise seemed to grow to an almost brought over meals that were again not are the Roasted Ratatouille ($9), Span- izing that the mistake was made. I think if unacceptable level. The culprits were four ours. Several minutes later, the manager ish style, with balsamic reduction, saffron I do get back to the beach sometime soon, young women sitting at a window table on came over and told us that our waitress aioli, pecorino, and French bread. There I will try to get there for breakfast, which is the other site of the dining room. Between was in training, and neglected to place is a wide variety of salads, including the served daily from 8 a.m. to noon. t

BALTIMORE OUTLOUD AUGUST 21, 2015 • baltimoreoutloud.com t 21 real estate

larly show-stopping in appearance. I be- lieve most people would pass by either This Old, Old House structure with nary a glance. Both can very easily be replaced. Fountains and prisons By Wayne Curtis living in them. are a dime a dozen. A recent news item caught my attention be- This should be a wake-up call to sellers. Let’s look at each individually. cause it covered something that’s now hav- The time to update and renovate your house That ancient, old prison is a behemoth. ing – and in the future even more so – will is now, before you plan on selling. Why? Most Its huge stone gothic exterior is dark and impact homeowners and the real estate mar- first time homebuyers do not want to buya looming. Over the years extensive renova- ket in general: the average age of an owner- fixer-upper. They want what I call the “HGTV tions and expansions to the facility as a occupied house in the U.S. has risen from 27 wow!” experience. Should They whole have been done. Shouldn’t we just years in 1993 to 37 years in 2013. Despite Tune in to a HGTV show tonight. It tear down the old decaying section and all the new housing built in the decade of the doesn’t matter whether it’s “HouseHunters,” Stay or Go? rebuild a state-of-the-art facility? After all, housing boom, approximately 65% of owner- or a show about investor flipping, homeowner would it really make sense to renovate the occupied dwellings were built be- renovation, or about the twin hun- By Harvey O old structure for public or private use con- fore 1980. Forty percent were built Ageing ky “Property Brothers” (everyone The first article I ever wrote for OUTloud sidering its extremely close proximity to before 1970. knows the appeal of that show has was about the adaptive reuse of structures the rest of the prison facility? Maybe not, This data, from the Federal housing little to do with real estate). When in Baltimore. Considering the changes we but the unique structure and the equally Department of Housing and Urban the prospective buyers or new are currently hearing about going on in impressive history make that question in- Development’s latest American stock homeowners walk into the door of town, I find myself wanting to address the triguing. Housing Survey, also finds that in their new house, the first word they subject again. As for the fountain at McKeldin Plaza, I Maryland the median age of such changes say is “Wow!” You hear it again in Change is not necessarily a bad thing. think whether or not to save it comes down housing is between 30 and 39 market the kitchen and the bathroom. Ev- I get that. But I have to admit it can occa- to emotion more than history. The foun- years. erything is new, shiny, beautifully sionally be a hard pill for me, personally, to tain was created with “experience” in mind. Thanks to a tepid recovery in dynamics decorated and staged. “Oh, wow!” swallow. So when I hear about yet another Visitors interact with the fountain via paths the homebuilding sector, we’ve If you want to impress this structure in Baltimore up on the chopping through the structure that extend in either been building fewer new homes generation of house hunters, get a direction over Light Street, since the housing crash. As a result, we’ve quick contract, even get multiple offers with east and west. It is meant to seen rental markets tighten up because of your home when it goes on the market, you be a destination, not just some- lack of inventory and rental rates skyrocket, must deliver the HGTV “Wow!” If you leave thing to admire in passing. But especially along the East Coast. We’ve also the buyer cold when they walk in, they will let’s face facts: there is noth- seen older rentals bought by owner occu- start looking for reasons either to dislike the ing pedestrian-friendly about pants. So, one of the reasons that existing home entirely, or to ding your asking price. McKeldin Plaza. It’s an island homes will become more valuable over the Do your renovations first. Paint. Stage the created by a spur to Calvert next few years is that the supply of single- property. Give ’em the “wow!” they’re looking Street from northbound Light. family homes will not be growing fast enough for. There’s no substitute for it in real estate But does closing that spur and to meet the expected demand. You can as- today. t redeveloping the space require sume these existing homes will also be less Wayne Curtis has been a licensed real- the removal of the fountain? energy efficient, and require more renovation tor in Maryland since 1997. You can learn Why can’t it be incorporated and even enlargement to accommodate the more about his practice at Charmcityreal- into the new design? owner-occupants who will be purchasing and estate.com. All these questions are not Baltimore City Detention Center going to be answered here. But I do know that something you think about these two special features 1967, it was Mayor Theodore R. McKeldin, does need to be done at both Baltimore has to offer. Should they stay or during his second term as mayor (not con- block, I do my best to stop and ask myself, of these locations. The status quo will not should they go? secutive), who dedicated the newly reno- should I fight for this particular structure work here. To stay viable and vibrant, Bal- One last interesting point of fact… in vated and expanded prison. t simply because it has been a part of Bal- timore needs to compete with other cities. timore’s history for so many years, or is it Pedestrian-friendly living and historical truly architecturally significant and a posi- fabric are important to residents. tive contribution to our city? I would like to hear from you. What do Two structures in the head- lines these days are the Bal- timore City Detention Center (formerly known as the Bal- timore City Jail), at 401 East Eager Street, built in 1801, and the fountain in McKeldin Plaza, on the southeast corner of Light and Pratt Streets, completed in 1982. On the surface it seems like a no-brainer to many peo- ple. It’s a freaking fountain and a deteriorating prison. Why save them? Neither is particu- Mortar fountain in McKeldin Plaza

22 t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD AUGUST 21, 2015 • baltimoreoutloud.com BALTIMORE OUTLOUD AUGUST 21, 2015 • baltimoreoutloud.com t 23 a brick” fundraiser to At the D.C. Eagle leather night every Fri- Place & Leather Central (1226 Herron Av- raise money to help day and Sir Steve and I enue, Pittsburgh) will host the Mid-Atlantic get the new D.C. have not missed many. Drummer / Drummerboy / Drummer Boot- Leather Eagle completed. The deck is a great place black Contest over the weekend of Octo- Line A 4-by-8 brick with to enjoy a cigar and the ber 9 to 11. The contest will be held at 9 Rodney Burger three lines engraved wonderful weather we p.m. on Saturday. The weekend will be part (18 characters) cost have had this summer. of Smoke East and will also include demos $100 ($150 for gran- (And with $3 beers, I and a victory BBQ on Sunday. ite) and an 8-by-8 enjoy it even more.) Mr. Speaking of Drummer titleholders, Raising the brick with six lines Maryland Leather 2015 everyone is aware that the Club Hippo (18 characters) cost Greg King has been host- is closing this year and it looks like it will Bar $200 ($250 granite). ing an interview once a not be around to host the 17th annual “12 He has raised over month there with mem- Days of Christmas” show on December 12. Okay I admit it. I like bars. And since I am $5,000 from leather bers of the local leather Maryland Mr. Drummer 1999 Rik Newton- gay, I like gay bars. I grew up in Hagerstown clubs, leather title- community. (Check out Treadway has been going crazy trying to and the very first gay bar I ever walked into holders, and D.C. Ea- mine on YouTube. I had find a location that would seat 300 people was the Deer Park Lodge (now called just gle supporters from so much fun doing it.) and have those adult beverages we all The Lodge). When I moved to Baltimore in all over the country Next on the schedule are enjoy. I am pleased to announce that the 1984 I walked into my first leather bar, The and even some from Mike McDonnell, who is show will go on and tickets will go on sale Gallery One Bar at 1735 Maryland Avenue. outside the U.S. Talk Mr. Touché 1982 (Chi- soon for the 17th annual extravaganza (The Gallery was a dress-code leather about supporting cago), and also a bar back in the day.) I am happy to report your leather bar! longtime member of The D.C. that both The Gallery and The Lodge are The ShipMates of the Maryland leath- Eagle: Gritty still around and I feel at home when I visit Baltimore held their first bar night at the er community. His interview will be & for real them. We are living in a time when gay bars new D.C. Eagle on Friday, August 14 and Friday, August 21, at 8 p.m., and on are closing all over the country. As each I was thrilled to be able to proudly place Friday, September 18, Greg will inter- one closes I hear someone say or post the ShipMates’ beer mugs in the new mug view COMMAND, MC founding mem- on Facebook: “I’m really sad that place is rack at the club bar. These mugs had been ber and Mr. Mid-Atlantic Leather 1989 closing. I haven’t been there in years, but packed away in my garage since I removed Dan Noel. These interviews have been I am sorry to see it close.” Or they post: “I them from the D.C. Eagle’s location on great and everyone stays around af- don’t go out anymore, but I used to enjoy New York Avenue. Some of the ShipMates’ terwards for leather night at The Loft. going there.” Or worst yet: “What a shame mugs are very old and there are a few en- All are invited, the interviews are free, that place closed, I always wanted to go graved with the names of members who and it is a wonderful evening. Also on there.” When are we going to start support- are no longer with us. The tradition once Friday, September 25 starting a 9 p.m. ing our gay bars? Oh that’s right we can go was that when a member passed his mug at The Loft the ShipMates are hosting to straight bars now since all discrimina- would be turned over in the rack. It almost a cigar party and are giving out free cigars which will be held on December 12 at The tion has vanished. A friend of mind has a brought a tear to my eye to return those to the first 50 people. Come out and sup- Conference Center at The Maritime Insti- new-in-town, very young boyfriend. He is mugs to D.C. The D.C. Eagle has been port The Loft and Grand Central! tute located at 692 Maritime Boulevard in showing him all the suburban straight bars. around in various locations for 43 years. It Greg King will also be taking his Mr. Linthicum Heights, Maryland. Doors will I guess someday he can say, “When I was has played a big part in the history of our Maryland Leather 2015 title up to The open at noon and the show will start at 2 young there were lots of straight bars – in local leather community. With our support, Lodge located at 21614 National Pike in p.m. Reserved seating is $25 (tables of fact we had whole straight neighborhoods!” it can be around for many more years. I Boonsboro, Maryland, on Saturday, Sep- eight are $200) and general admission will The leather clubs do a lot of fundraising look forward to returning the other set of tember 26, from 9 p.m. to 2 a.m. for a be $20. Who would have thought last year and most of that fundraising is done in gay ShipMates’ mugs to the Baltimore Eagle “Leather & Fetish Blackout Party.” Cover that we were enjoying our last “12 Days of bars. The bars support us and we support next year. charge is just $3 before 10 p.m. and $5 Christmas” at The Club Hippo and that this the bars. Mr. D.C. Eagle 2015 Dan Ronne- Speaking of local leather history, The after 10. There will be a puppy mosh, a Christmas this anchor of Mt. Vernon would berg has even been hard at work on a “buy Loft above Grand Central is still having jockstrap auction, demos, bootblacks, and be closed? more. Sounds like the perfect night for me In other Mt. Vernon news: I stopped in to revisit my first gay bar! Chained Desires on August 15 to say good- Many in the leather community were bye to my friend Karen, who is closing her saddened when they heard that the Double Read Street leather and fetish store after L Bar in Rehoboth Beach closed on New nine years. Karen was always quick to of- Year’s Eve. I had so many wonderful mem- fer me gift cards for fundraisers or leather ories of attending the Mr. Double L Leather contest prizes every time I asked her. She Contest over the years. Good news! Not even hosted a party in her store one year only is the bar back open, but the Mr. during Pride with lots of food. I will always Double L Leather Contest is scheduled at remember it just as I still think about how the bar on September 19. All those folks much fun I had at the ShipMates’ Daddy who were upset that the bar closed need Christmas events at The Quest. As you to show up and support this fun contest. know they razed that bar and replaced it Plus September is such a beautiful time in with townhouses. Please come out and Rehoboth Beach, Delaware. support our LGBT friendly businesses and Another leather title that is coming back area gay bars. Raise a glass and enjoy our this year is Mid-Atlantic Drummer. Donny’s community, before they raze another bar. t 24 t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD AUGUST 21, 2015 • baltimoreoutloud.com BALTIMORE OUTLOUD AUGUST 21, 2015 • baltimoreoutloud.com t 25 26 t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD AUGUST 21, 2015 • baltimoreoutloud.com Sorry I can’t take your call – I’m in a meeting

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