Vol. XCIV, Issue No. 3 SINCE 1916 Friday, September 8, 2006 Doerr to speak at commencement Wiess freshman Billionaire alumnus backed Amazon.com and Google

by Perry Factor week to discuss what they would its first choice. Orchard said. Doerr like to hear in a commencement — who spoke at the University of dies in car crash THKKSHKKSTAFF speech. Jones College President California Haas Business School com- by Risa Gordon Billionaire venture capitalist and Patricia Mahoney, who was also on mencement last year — accepted the

rHKKSHKK I ITexas Department of ate and well-known entrepreneur. students." Forbes magazine's 2005 rankings. In Public Safety, Williams' Mini The committee wanted to choose a Orchard said the committee 2006, Forbes ranked him second on its Cooper drifted over the center speaker with a particular interest in — which included two graduate stu- Midas List, a list of the top high-tech line as he was driving westbound Rice graduates, Orchard said. dents and two seniors — developed and life sciences investors. on Route 290. His car collided "[We didn't want] a hired a list of ideal criteria for a speaker, Doerr graduated from Rice with with an eastbound Jeep. Wil- gun — someone with no affiliation or among which were a connection an electrical engineering degree liams, 19, and the two passengers interest [in Rice] who would demand to Rice, a national reputation and a and from Harvard Business School in the Jeep died at the scene. a huge fee, give a talk and get out," message that would resonate with in 1974. That same year he joined Three other eastbound travelers Orchard said. students. The committee then created Intel, which was then a start-up were injured. Wiess freshman Chris Williams. Doerr, who could not be reached a list of about 10 potential speakers company. Wiess College Master for comment, met with students last and unanimously selected Doerr as see DOERR, Page 4 Michael Gustin said in the two He had already attended a practice weeks Williams was at Rice, he for club rugby — one of his favor- made many friends among fresh- ite sports — and was cast in one men and upperclassmen. of Wiess' freshman one-act plays. "He was very good at putting Kudron, a senior, said each group people at ease, so it was very easy wanted Williams to be in its play. for him to have a lot of friends," Williams also enjoyed soccer Gustin said. "And he did have and played pick-up games in the a lot of friends within a short Wiess acabowl, Kudron said. 1 period of time." "He was the type of person Sid Richardson College you want at Rice and who fits in junior Lindsay Balthrop, who because he does so much and f was Williams' co-fellow during wants to get his hand in a lot of Orientation Week, said Williams different things," Kudron said. was very social. Balthrop said Williams attended high school Williams was upbeat even after at Eton College in England. After he fell and briefly lost conscious- graduation, he spent a year trav- ness during Wiess' skits at the eling and had friends throughout end of O-Week. Balthrop said the world, Gustin said. Kudron Williams laughed and asked said Williams liked to talk about about the other members of his travels in Cambodia, China, his O-Week group while in the Thailand and Vietnam. ambulance on the way to the Balthrop said Williams was emergency room. He liked to excited to be at Rice and in the share funny stories, she said. United States. "He was a vibrant personality, "He was always talking about almost electric," Balthrop said. how ... excited he was to be at "You could talk to him for one Rice with so many opportuni- time for 15 minutes and feel like ties here," Balthrop said. "In you knew a lot about him because everything he did, he always lie was so ready to get to know had a smile on his face and was people." just ready to jump in with all that MARCUS ROMAN THRESHER Wiess College President Chris is Rice." Kudron, who was one of Williams' Kudron said he wishes he Rally time friends, said Williams quickly could have had more time to get Students cheer at the football rally Aug. 31 at Rice Stadium. An estimated 1.193 students attended the first became involved in Rice activities. see WILLIAMS. Page 4 football football game of the year Saturday, in which the University of Houston edged Rice 31-30.

Rice EMS to use IVs, advanced drugs OPINION Page 3 by Stephanie Jennings EMS Director Cathy Sunday said Introduction to Emergency Care 1 Academic deadlines Rice candidate silenced EMS has considered ALS certifica- and HEAL 310: EMT Intermediate: rHKKSHKKSTAFF Add/Drop PINs for Fall 2006 A&E Page 7 tion for a long time. Introduction to Emergency Care II. expire for undergraduates today at Fating out Turkish style Rice Emergency Medical Ser- "Prior to [ALS certification], Sunday said EMS personnel 5 p.m. Today is also the last day to vices may now use IVs and intubate there wasn't much we could do while learn all required ALS skills in add a course online without a fee, SPORTS Page 12 patients. EMS was state-certified waiting for the City of Houston to these two classes. In addition, all to add a course without obtaining Cross country preview Sept. 2 to provide Advanced Life arrive," Sunday said. EMTs will have extra training in an instructor's permission and to Quote of the Week Support and now also has more Decker, a Martel College senior, administering IVs and intubating convert a Spring 2(K)6 Pass/Fail "We that [Texas is] a good team. medicine available, including drugs said EMS Medical Director George patients, for example. designation to a grade. know for cardiac arrest and overdoses. Kiss encouraged EMS staff to revise Initially, if a situation requires We're going to have to take our A' Previously, Rice emergency its treatment protocols over the ALS-level treatment, the on-duty game. But I think [our] team is the best team [Rice has] had yet. and medical technicians were limited summer and have them approved EMT will contact Sunday to explain Dress for success when they're on. they ... can beat to basic first aid measures such as by the HFI) chief medical director. the situation and the need for the Don your business attire for anyone." applying splints or administering After HFI) signed off on the treat- treatment. the Rice Career Expo today at — Head Soccer Coach Chris Huston on oxygen or oral glucose for hypo- ment protocols, they were sent to Sunday said EMTs will act on a Autry Court from 1-5 p.m. About the team's Sunday home game against glycemic patients. When advanced the Texas Department of Health and more independent basis as the pro- 90 companies are expected to the University of Texas. See Story, treatment was needed, EMTs had Human Services for approval. gram becomes more established. attend, so brings lots of copies of P3ge 13. to call Houston Fire Department EMS In-Charge Andy Miller "We're not going to be running your resume. Scoreboard EMS. said Kiss' progressive attitude around sticking IVs in everyone," Volleyball "We've always had situations in made the move to ALS certification Decker said. "We don't forget our McNeese State 0. Rice 3 the past, such as allergic reactions possible. foundation in the basic skills, but the Tuck Fexas "[The ALS certification] is A1.S skills provide an extra level of | or diabetic shock, where we could Skip your Sunday evening Weekend Weather exciting because there are lots of treatment for the Rice community." have used these measures," EMS problem sets and meetings to cheer Friday I aptain Cameron Decker said. "The opportunities for ALS skills to make Music graduate student Evan on the women's soccer team as it Mostly sunny, 70-92 degrees difference now is that it used to be an impact on students," Miller, a Leslie said ALS certification will Saturday takes on the University of Texas if someone was in diabetic shock, Sid Richardson College junior, said. be helpful. Scattered storms. 71 91 degrees at 7 p.m. at the Rice Track/Soccer all we could do was [say,] 'Here's "This happens more often than "If they're properly certified, Sunday Stadium. some glucose for you to swallow.' people realize." then it's much better for the EMTs Scattered storms. 72-86 degrees Now we can initiate an IV and push EMTs receive training in first-aid to give the treatments than waiting sugar through it." procedures in HEAL308: EMT: Basic see EMS, Page 6 m

THE RICE THRESHER OPINION FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 8, 2006

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the Rice Thresher OH $0s MTY. 0U.fi temiNixX ot TH6 ftlDlCULOl/i NOSJALb) OUR bQ/efc/rrtoH iHexmcASii' M OiA IN WHICH MB Doerr consults students, so /uevex exisTEP should future committees LETTERS TO THE EDITOR

At the end of last year, the Thresher recommended qualities we the colleges in, just don't stick them mass-market bookstores, such as Barnes and Noble, our bookstore's wanted to see in future commencement speakers ("Our2007 speaker Resist limiting in my backyard." Being from the south colleges, I parent company. Unfortunately for picks," April 28). activism to hippies really am not too concerned about the Rice community, the display We explained that he or she should not be just a recognizable the space lost up north by the new panel most readily visible from outside the bookstore presents name, but also a fascinating speaker who can connect with students. To the editor: construction. But finally, I am not six problems. In order from top Somehow, the Commencement Speaker Committee needed to find Last week's political cartoon, going to mention that the people to bottom of the display, they are: an intellectually stimulating icon with ties to Rice who would provide saying student activism at Rice is behind this decision have probably Organic Chemistry I For Dummies, nothing more than "self-righteous considered many proposals, and I'm a look at the real world — without requiring an honorary degree or Algebra Demystified, Philosophy far rants," peace sign shirts and keggers pretty sure that they are making the exorbitant fee in compensation. And for Commencement 2007, the Dummies, Geometry For Dummies, in the fields disappointed me (Car- best decision they can, regardless of Algebra Workbook For Dummies committee seems to have found that person. toon, Sept. 1). This defeatist attitude how cool it may be. I am also not go- and Physics For Dummies. John Doerr (Lovett 73) has the connections, recognition and expe- worries me, especially since it was ing to mention that I will be waiting rience to make a great speaker. We are glad he has met with seniors directed at freshmen. It suggests in the parking lot with a shovel to An institution such as the Wil- discuss Z<'K h's rhetorical style. liam Marsh Rice University for the on campus and are impressed that he was interested in what sort that any non-traditional movement to create change is pointless and that Advancement of Arts, Letters and of speech would leave an impression on them. A self-made Silicone those who try are working towards Nick Alexander Science is ostensibly interested in Valley billionaire, Doerr will certainly have some advice to offer. a lost cause. Hanszen junior matriculating the best and brightest Doerr is different from usual speakers and fits Rice well — but In addition, the association of of students; instructing, informing people like that are few and far between. Some years, a great candi- student activism with hippie culture and teaching them to think; and then sending them off into the world date may become apparent and available in August. In other years, is an insult to those who participate Saturday dinner is in any kind of activism. The prob- with pomp, circumstance and a committee members may find themselves racking their brains for lem with this association is that by best not served bachelor's degree of notable value. speaker ideas in December. We would like the Commencement focusing on the culture associated Being that we profess "A Degree Speaker Committee to have data and ideas available from the with activism, we end up ignoring To the editor: of Difference," we ought to dare to current graduating class for those years. the problems that activists aim to ad- Housing and Dining's recent display that difference by using our campus bookstore's display shelv- The use of online senior surveys, as in previous years, would dress. It is easier to attack a tie-dyed announcement adding Saturday din- shirt than to actually listen to what ner to the menus at Rice's serveries ing to proclaim that which makes certainly help the committee gauge student opinion. Seniors may end the person wearing the tie-dyed is the most recent misstep in the us different, rather than having it up just proposing Stephen Colbert and others who are unfortunately shirt is saying. oft-bungled college-based dining proclaim: "Our students are badly unattainable, but they could also provide a few original names or We must also remember that service. While I support my own in need of remedial education on qualities — and make clearer what type of speaker they desire. the '60s counterculture movement college's food during the week, I topics whose mastery were, until recently, considered a requirement While not every speaker seeks students' input like Doerr has, was just that: the '60s countercul- am very thankful for the lack of a ture movement. If we write off any Saturday dinner on campus that at for matriculation." we at least hope the committee always will. movement that looks hippie-ish, the very least provides my friends Perhaps a more fitting display thinking that it is just a bunch of and me with a reason to get off would include books by our distin- people complaining without any campus at least once a week. Were guished and accomplished faculty ideas to solve problems, we close it not necessary for Rice students and alumni. Books of great value and ourselves off to a lot of new ideas. to venture forth to find sustenance lasting impact to our society would Common reading: good We're a smart bunch here at Rice. (in Saturdays, the prevailing feeling also make for an excellent display. We should use our smarts to learn of apathy towards experiencing life This window is an opportunity for about the real issues and problems outside the hedges would certainly us as a university community to wear idea, needs improvement of our times and find creative ways result in an even more insular atmo- our literary hearts on our academi- to solve those problems. sphere than what already exists. cally-excellent sleeves. If indeed we Very few new students showed up to the common reading lec- Let's not quell our urges, as ide- In order for Rice to become the are to realize President Leebron's tures this week, which does not bode well for next week's speakers. alistic and far-fetched as they might well-rounded, nationally recognized Vision for the Second Century, we Despite this undeniably shaky beginning, we think the program has be, to make this world a better school it has every right to be, this must live the role of a world-class re- place. Let's resist the temptation to atmosphere must be eliminated, and search university. Proudly declaring potential to positively influence campus life inside and outside the label any non-traditional movement taking away students' excuses to get that we are a university "For Dum- classroom in future years. to create change as "hippie." Let's out only hurts this idea. mies" seems to run quite contrary We do not want to see the common reading program die, but it give ourselves some credit for our Furthermore, adding an expen- to such lofty goals. must change if next year's matriculants can be expected to partici- own ideas and responses to the sive dinner to the servery regimen pate. First, the readings should be mailed with Orientation Week world's problems. diverts money that could otherwise Daniel McNicklc be used to improve the current Brown senior packets instead of merely posted on the O-Week Web site, which is Sarah Taylor meal situation. 'Hie $3.25 difference not even directly linked to Rice's homepage. The additional publicity Lovett senior between the new dinner and old would ensure that all new students have quick, direct access to the breakfast adds up to over $ 1(X),(XX) per readings before they arrive on campus. semester if each on-campus student's CONTACTING THE As far as content goes, we like the idea of a series of articles Despite rhetoric, new meal plan is counted. The Threshers article plainly states that this money instead of a single book. The compilation offers a broader range of THRESHER college plan works was originally "allocated for new perspectives on an intellectual topic, and we like that the program did equipment" in the serveries. As a resi- Letters not simply mirror the novel-a-summer common reading programs To the editor: dent of one of the four colleges that • I otters tot he editor should of our peer universities. By now, everyone knows about has its own kitchen, I know that this be sent to the 77tresher by e- We want an engaging intellectual environment to be emphasized the plan to expand Rice's housing by money would be far more appreciated mail to [email protected]. let- building two new colleges near the if it were put towards improving the ters must be received by 5 p. early in the first-year experience. This year, O-Week programs did current three north colleges, espe- weekday food that students patronize m. on the Monday prior to a not call any attention to the common reading program. O-Week is the cially after Zach Marshall's column more in the first place. Friday publication date. only time when new students are truly captive audiences to lectur- last week ("New College squeeze Students must voice their opin- • All letters to the editor must ers and upperclassmen. And while O-Week is already overstuffed ruins paradigm of Northness," ions to H&D regarding this matter, be signed and include college with speakers and workshops, preexisting activities could easily Sept. 1). While no one is happy that and I trust that as a branch of the and year if the writer is a Rice we are going to lose valuable field university that exists to serve the incorporate common reading topics. student. and parking space, 1 am not going Rice population, H&I) will listen. • Letters should be no The English Composition Exam, for example, could offer an to mention all the reasons why this longer than 250 words in essay with a prompt relevant to one of the common reading topics. probably is the case. William Pryor length. The Thresher re- The hired speaker, introduced this year, could be an expert on a I'm not going to mention that Sid sophomore serves the right to edit common reading theme — one of the article's authors would be Rice is a notoriously small campus, letters for both content and so space for building is hard to ideal, especially if that author were not a faculty member. length. come by. I am not going to men- Bookstore display This year, two lunches during O-Week were devoted to giving new tion that while north campus will Subscribing students opportunities to meet with faculty about academic prospects, lose much of its field and parking depicts dumb Rice • Annual subscriptions are in addition to the two-hour academic fair held every year. One of space, there are not too many available for $50 domestic and these academic lunches could be replaced with a common reading other options. 1 am especially not To the editor: $125 international via first going to mention that no one who discussion group lunch, where new students, O-Week advisers and 1 would like to applaud the class mail. is really considering relocating the University's summer efforts with even faculty could bond while debating an intellectual topic. sites of the two new colleges has respect to the renovated campus Advertising These changes would not alter O-Week's schedule severely. considered including the "physical bookstore. The new facility is • We accept display and But they could improve the "intellectual community" that Dean allowable level of overwhelming well organized, attractive, efficient classified advertisements. of Undergraduates Robin Forman sought as a primary goal of the coolness for one area." and staffed with friendly, helpful Advertisements must be employees. It even has a welcoming received by 5 p.m. on the common reading program. Besides coolness not being a measurable quantity that I am aware new window overlooking the Inner Monday prior to a Friday We hope the common reading program continues, and we hope of, all Martel residents, includ- Loop, allowing outside observers to publication date. Please con- that it continues to evolve to attract students' interest. ing Mr. Marshall, should quickly appreciate three mannequins outfit- tact our advertising man- count on their fingers how many ted in Rice athletic garb. ager at (713)348-3967 or [email protected] for Unsigned editorials represent the majority opinion of the Thresher north colleges there are. Jones, Behind the mannequins are Brown — I just keep getting two. It more information. editorial staff. two freestanding displays of books is easy to say, "I don't care if we put in the style popular with modern THE RICE THRESHER OPINION FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 8, 2006 Guest column Politicos limit local debate, voter choice Guest column Last year, I filed as a candi- have yet to be publicized, current But apparently, voters do not War Owls' enthusiasm begets date in the race for Texas State Wee Young Democrats President deserve to hear any candidates who Representative in District 134, which Ryan Goodland did inform me that have not raised at least half a million includes Rice University. As an under- my invitation to the event has been in campaign funds. Instead, the Demo- graduate, I felt my decision withdrawn. Goodland, crats and Republicans make the deci- fun, regardless of scoreboard would show my peers the who had spoken against sion for the voters, achieving only a many options they have my candidacy before, sanitized, politically expedient version Millennia from now, when Losing 56-7 isn't painful, it's when they step into the vot- weakly apologized, rea- of their own so-called democracy. future archaeologists look back pathetic. loosing 31-30 is painful. on our wretched little civilization The team was so close the fans ing booths in November. soning that only my two Perhaps the most disconcerting and attempt to reconstruct a his- could taste it. When they lost The two-party system opponents have a chance detail of this situation is how some tory of our people based by a point, they were dominatesthe political land- of winning. He did not of my fellow students at Rice have competitive to the scape in the United States, acknowledge that I am exclusively on college lowered themselves to encourag- extreme — it's impos- preventing alternative can- a legitimate and serious football records, they will ing such suppression of ideas. My sible to lose by less. As didates from gaining po- candidate with clearly only know that the Uni- own student activity fees will go to we slowly let our unde- litical power of any signifi- Mhair stated positions, reflecting versity of Houston won support an event from which I will feated season slip away, sentiments from across last week's game. They cance. Yet this system is not Dekmezian be censored. While I have plans to the crowded student the political spectrum. I will not know the whole enforced by true popular appeal to the administration to inter- section could feel the also have full ballot access, story — but we do. demand — every election vene on my behalf, the underlying tension in the stands. season, we feel we must somehow granted by the signatures of tens of problem persists. Ask yourselves: We know that our select the lesser of two evils, lest we thousands ofTexans who have stated Is this event being planned for the attendance of 23,000 is The Cougar fans "waste" our votes. Maintaining liberty that they want change. benefit of the voters, so they can learn one small step for ticket Eric were silent for more than half the game. By and democracy in our country neces- There are many arguments all sides of the issues and make an sales, one giant leap for Silbcrman sitates altering this fundamentally against my exclusion, and my informed decision, or are the organiz- Rice. Sure, Ohio State's the way, did anyone Hawed system. opponents have simplified my task ers simply trying to secure additional Horseshoe sat 110,(HX) else think some of the District KM has a wealthy, highly- in finding them. power at society's expense? people even before school was ladies were a little too old to flash in session. But by percentage shockers? I walked up the aisle at educated populace. It has some of the "This district is one of the If I am, as they claim, not a serious increase, we destroyed them like one point and held my hand to my top private and public schools in the most educated — if not the most candidate, what can my opponents my dad's attempt at carving a ear trying, unsuccessfully, to egg state. 'Hie constituents are, presum- educated — in the state, and the lose by my inclusion in the debate Thanksgiving turkey. 'em on. They were so silent they ably, intelligent enough to make sound idea that candidates don't have to let besides from a few minutes to brush wouldn't even retort. One fat guy decisions with their votes. Unfortu- voters compare them side by side is We know that our parade my ideas aside? Perhaps Wong and in the back finally said," Does your nately, candidates' constant attempts unthinkable," Ellen Cohen's campaign Cohen fear that they themselves may before the game didn't attract quite as many people as the ear hurt?" I thought, "Hell yeah to silence the voices of opponents manager. Bill Kelley, said. publicly have their platforms toppled it does. I've been standing in the deny voters the opportunity to educate in an intellectual discussion. Aggie Midnight Scream — but not a single person in our parade Rice student section!" themselves about their choices. Whether or not this matter is was groped or raped. Also, there Earlier this year, incumbent Re- resolved, I encourage everyone "Hie number of UH fans there My own student activity were students there. The last time publican Rep. Martha Wong stead- to educate themselves fully to dis- was a little overwhelming to that happened was when Texas novice Rice football supporters, fastly refused to debate either me or cover their full range of options. fees will go to support was exclusively a Democratic but we outnumbered them. Some Democratic candidate Ellen Cohen, Voters should attend debates, but state and President Johnson of them set up tailgates at noon, soundly reasoning that it would draw an event from which I they should not depend only on the was, well, not very popular with which seems a little much, doesn't attention away from herself. During candidates for facts and viewpoints. college-aged hippies. The parade it? I mean, our parking lot is nice last Spring semester, Rice Young will he censored. Instead, they should read as many was small but rocking. For those and all, but eight hours before Democrats former President Ian news sources as they can — both of you who missed it, you should kickoff? Some of them made Everhart approached me regarding print and electronic—and never shy join in next time. For those of you shirts, including some with mis- a three-way debate to be hosted Wong's campaign manager. Josh away from political discussions with who came, keep it up. The atmo- spellings. Some of them brought this October in the Rice Memorial Hamilton, seems to agree: "We think peers. It is about time voters got the sphere was awesome. People little cougar paws on sticks. We Center, co-sponsored by the Rice this [debate! is great," he said in the full political picture, and the move- were learning the noble lyrics to didn't really do that. College Republicans. I enthusiasti- West University Examiner. "That's ment should start on campus. our fight song — "stand, cheer, 1 went only when the parade cally agreed to participate. what democracy is supposed to be drink more beer!" got there. And I was handed a War Since then, Wong has caved, about — candidates meeting face- Mhair Dekmezian is a Brown College People were having fun at the Owls shirt and a foam finger only agreeing to two separate debates, in- to-face to explain their positions junior and Libertarian eandidate for expense ofUH, which is, admittedly, when I got there — which you cluding this one at Rice. While details firsthand to voters." State Representative for District 134. a little too easy. My personal favorite could orient in just such a way to was the UH "Rice Chicks are Ugly" make it look like the big finger shirt. "Rice chicks may be ugly, but was in the middle. I brought my Self-proclaimed gadfly UH chicks are pregnant," became enthusiasm. I brought my spirit. I the standard response. brought my voice — which didn't In terms of the game itself, we make it back home with me, alas. Student quirks create exceptional dating scene scored four — count 'em — four I brought expectations for a new era, and I got it. Rice has a bad reputation in the dat- girls whose idea of a romantic night certainly are attracted to one another. touchdowns. We kicked a field goal. ing department, or so says stereotypes. iscurlingupon a futon and watching They're just afraid to settle down, We sc(>red.'!()points. That's right, 30. Coach Graham, you rock. ()ur girls are ugly, our guys are nerdy Futurama. And nothingis sexier than given all the other amazing potential That zero isn't a typo, it is actually Thank you for reminding me how and there is no middle ground between a woman who can calculate the speed mates that dwell on campus. It's like supposed to be there after the three. much fun it is to go to a game and the drunken hookup and of light by observing potato chips, you can't have just one. We were winning at halftime. cheer. For reminding me that we don't need to beat Texas, or even marriage without a ring. the Galilean moons. Any ()r maybe Rice students are just too Our defense swarmed and Houston, to be a program worth Heck, supposedly Play- complaints about hotness socially awkward to take it beyond pounded. Our offense passed, caring about. And for reminding boys May 2005 issue rated are just a testament to Rice the hookup. Either way, if Rice stu- ran and optioned to Washington me why football games have the Rice students among the women's unwillingness to dents finally do end up in a relation- Redskin-like perfection. (Author's worst concession stands — they conform to silly trends. ship, they don't want to let go of the note: this is a huge compliment, as least sexual of mid-to- wouldn't even give me water, Plus, free T-shirts are a amazing person they've found. the Redskins are going to win the high tier private universi- just ice. ties. I haven't checked lot easier to remove than So while Hef and whiney campus Super Bowl this year.) I'm not say- Rice, I had fun. Come out and for myself — I refuse any Chanel dresses. elitists may disagree, Rice studentsare ing we were the best team in college you will too. Guaranteed. pornographic publication But Rice men get a quite the catch — but more likely a football, but 1 watched the whole besides literary erotica Evan similarly as bad rap as the tropical rarity than your average cod. game and only threw up twice. Eric Silberman is a Hanszen from properly unioned university's women do, if It was a great game. It was College sophomore. sexual entrepreneurs. not worse: Rice guys are Evan Mintz is a Hanszen College junior a painful loss, but that's good. But 1 suppose Playboy immature slobs who pay and opinion and Backpage editor. provides an apt description of Rice more attention to beirut and text- for men who prefer the traditional books than women. But slobs just Playboy type — giggling sacks of sili- means they have priorities higher The Rice Thresher, the official student than fashion, textbooks means newspaper at Rice University since 1916. cone who get their personality from is published each Friday during the school a bottle of hair dye. Those who like they're driven and beirut means they the Rice Thresher year, except during examination periods and the Playboy \y\K- should probably stop like to hang out with friends. holidays, by the students of Rice tdiversity. reading thisand watch some'I"V—I'm And there is something to be David Brown Editorial and business offices are located sure there is something on E! with said about the claim in the Oct. 2002 Editor in Chief boobs. But when it comes to rating Seventeen that Rice has "cute boys of on the second floor of the Ley Student Center. Rice's sexual atmosphere, the average all stripes." Though more often than 6100 Main St.. MS-524. Houston, TX 77005- NEWS OPINION 1892. Phone (713) 348-4801. Fax (713) 348- student should turn away from Mr. not, those strijx's are World ofWarcraft Kisa Gordon, Editor Evan Mintz. Editor 5238. F.-mail: [email protected]. Web page: Hefner's iiirbrushed extravaganza and obsessors or Wikipedia fanatics. But Beko Hinder, Asst Editor Schuyler Woods, Asst Editor www.ricethresher.org. look to the second-best free weekly in these nerdy pastimes just show that Matt Youn, Designer SPORTS Annual subscription rate: $50 domestic, Houston, the Houston Press. Rice men like to devote themselves to COPY Stephen Whitfield, Editor In 2004, Houston Press rated Rice's something—which can be bad if it's a Carl Hammarsten, Editor Dylan Farmer, Editor $125 international. Nonsubscription rate: first own Valhalla as the best place to meet computer game, but good if it's a girl- Ryan Stickney, Editor copy free, second copy $5. friend. Think of it, all the money saved BUSINESS single women. The dank Keck sul>- ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT Sawyer Bonsib, Business Manager The Thresher reserves the right to refuse level certainly is not the favorite water- from canceling a WoW subscription Julia Bursten. Editor Adam Benaroya, Asst. Business Manager any advertising for any reason. Additionally, ing hole of any Paris Hilton tyix>—and could go to a Tiffany's necklace. Rice Bryce Gray, Asst Editor Charlie Foucar, Subscriptions Manager the Thresher does not take responsibility Sarah Mitchell. Payroll Manager boys are cute, shaggy and funloving, for the factual content of any ad. Printing that is what makes it so wonderful. Sarah Taylor, Office Manager LIFESTYLES an advertisement does not constitute an Instead, it isagreat place to meet smart but devoted—kind of like puppies. All Julia Bursten, Editor Daniel Holman, Distribution Manager women who, as the Press puts it, "may it takes is the right woman to bring out Margaret Turin, Asst Editor Brian Wolf. Distribution Manager endorsement by the Thresher. even be a touch out of your league." a noble Underdog. PHOTOGRAPHY ADVERTISING I Insigned editorials represent the majority Come to think of it, Rice as a Maybe that is what leads to Rice's Diana Yen, Editor Matt Osher, Ads Manager opinion of the Th resher editorial staff. All other whole is a pretty great place to meet dating dilemma: The choices are Taylor Johnson. Editor Joseph Ramirez, Asst. Ads Manager opinion pieces represent solely the opinion of women. It is like Sunset and Main just too good. Meek, former social Marcus Roman, Asst Editor Sarah Mitchell, Classified Ads Manager the author. Hie Backpage is satire. rejects are too afraid to ask out that is some magical land where all the BACKPAGE CALENDAR Hie Thresheris a member of the Associated smart, driven chicks go to have fun. cutie in class, and those cuties don't Nathan Bledsoe. Editor Evan Mintz, Editor They roam the quads, ready for an know how cute they actually are. Collegiate Press. FYMDEK2K6! Marshall Robinson, Design Director Dan Derozier, Cartoonist able, young man to be the derivative If the supposedly disproportion- © COPYRIGHT 2006. to their function. Rice is one of the ate number of hookups to actual few places where you can you find dates says anything, Rice students THE RICE THRESHER NEWS FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 8. 2006 WILLIAMS From page 1 COMING SOON to know Williams better. "It's not so much about what we knew in two weeks, but it's more about what we were excited about for the future," Kudron said. 2005-2006 Balthrop said Williams will be missed at Rice. "He left a pretty big mark on a lot of people in a short time," Balthrop said. YEARBOOKS About 100 people attended a candlelight vigil Monday night in the driveway of the Wi- J / ess Maste i s House, and there was a memorial service in the college's commons Thursday. The 2006 Campanile will arrive Williams' family will hold a private funeral in the Woodlands today and is planning a memo- on campus around September 15. rial service in London for late October. Williams is survived by his parents, All undergraduates who were registered Stephanie of London and Derek of the Wood- lands, Texas, and sister, Anabel. during the 2005-06 academic year DEI AN TABAKOV/THRESHER are eligible to receive a yearbook. Previous yearbooks are also available for eligible students. 1

Distribution information will be announced soon. Questions? Email [email protected].

AMERICA'S NEXT

Created by Tyra Banks, this exciting reality series gives everyday people across the nation the opportunity to compete for a grand prize that will include a modeling contract with one of the world's top agencies. If you're a female between the ages of 18-27 and 5'7" or taller, and you think you have what it takes to make it in the TAYLOR JOHNSON THR! high stress, high stakes world of modeling, then go to Top: Students gather at the Wiess Masters House for a candlelight vigil Sept. 4 in honor of Chris Williams. www.cwtv.com for complete eligibility requirements, more Above: Williams, left, and his Orientation Week fellow, Wiess College senior Ik Imo, among the crowd at the athletics rally information, and to apply for the show. Aug. 22 at Rice Stadium. HOUSTON OPEN CALL AUDITIONS POLICE BLOTTER Saturday, September 16th, 10am - 4pm DOERR The following incidents were reported to the Rice University Police From page 1 Department for the period Aug. 28-Sept. 4. The Galleria In 1980, Doerr joined Kleiner 5075 Westheimer Rd., Houston, TX 77056 Perkins Caufield & Byers, a Califor- Will Rice College Aug 28 Headphones stolen. Auditions will be held on the street level nia-based venture capital firm, where he still works today. Since then he has by the new, north expansion wing. Wiess College Aug 30 Laptop stolen. backed the start-ups of Ama20n.c0m, •Casting Director Will Be In Attendance* Jones College Sept 1 Two credit cards stolen. Google, Intuit and Sun Microsystems, and he currently serves on the boards Wiess College Sept 3 Non-Rice subject given criminal of directors of those companies. He trespass warning at football game, also backed the launch of Netscape CJUJ39 arrested and remanded to Harris and Compaq. County Jail. In April, Doerr and his wife, Ann, Sid Richardson Sept 4 Subject observed sleeping in donated $2.5 million to Rice to fund After '80s weekend, you're College running vehicle at loading dock. projects that apply computational sci- Subject arrested for driving while ence to biomedical research. Doerr going to be missing our coffee intoxicated and remanded to Harris has also donated to California political County Jail. causes, including ballot propositions to fund public schools and stem cell Almost as much as you miss Wiess College Sept 4 Student observed attemptirg to research. urinate in public referred to Student these haircuts. Will Rice College senior Chris Judicial Programs. Lamontagne said he does not Academic Buildings think students will appreciate a Sewall Hall Aug 28 Laptop stolen. speaker who is not well-known to undergraduates. McNair Hall Aug 29 Laptop stolen. "1 don't think it will be a popu- Sewall Hall Aug 30 Laptop stolen. lar choice, but hopefully people will treat IDoerr) with respect," Space Science Sept 3 Three tree plaques with the names Lamontagne said. Building Gram Glass, Richard Smalley and Brown College senior Laura Robert Curl stolen. Szarmach said she would like a better-known speaker, but thinks Other Buildings Doerr's background could make Student Center Aug 28 Skateboard stolen. his speech valuable. Parking Lots "I've been underwhelmed with Greenbriar Lot Aug 29 Motor vehicle burglarized. [speakers from) previous years because 1 feel that Rice can do Greenbriar Lot Sept 4 Motor vehicle burglarized. better," Szarmach said. "Someone Other Areas with a successful career and Rice Willy's Pub Aug 31 Student cited for minor in experience could be inspiring." RICE COFFEEHOUSE possession and referred to Last year, Houston Mayor Bill Student Judicial Programs. White spoke at commencement, Keeping your hair safe. and Psychology Professor Mikki University Police Sept 1 New hours! See them at our Web site: Student received harassing e-mails Hebl spoke in 2005. Other recent from off-campus subject. www.rice.edu/coffBehouse speakers include Attorney General Alberto Gonzales (Lovett 79), astro- Rice Stadium Sept 2 Two non-Rice subjects issued And come to the Welcome Back Fwent on Tuesday. Sept 12' naut Shannon Lucid and comedian citations for fighting. Bill Cosby. THE RICE THRESHER NEWS FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 8, 2006 Kelty on common reading: Popper STUDENT ASSOCIATION The Student Association met Monday. The following were discussed.

• SA President Althea Tupper held a moment of silence for Chris helped define scientific theory Williams, a Wiess College freshman, who died Sept. 3. (See story, page 1.) • Tupper, a Hanszen College senior, announced a T-shirt design contest by Beko Binder cess include a free exchange of Wiess College senior Hiren for the Rice-University of Texas football game Sept. 16. Submissions THRKSHER EDITORIAL STAFF ideas, openness to arguments and Patel said the lecture resonated were due today at 12 a.m. The T-shirts will cost $5. commitment to experimental work, with him. After no students attended Kelty said. "I want to be a theorist," Patel • SA External Vice President Ceci Mesta announced that volunteers Tuesday night's common read- Kelty also discussed the ideas of said. "[The discussion] told me are needed to help with Families Weekend Sept. 14-17. Volunteers ing discussion, about 20 attended Karl Popper, the author of a short theories are not the only thing to will get a free barbecue dinner. The theme for Families Weekend Wednesday night's discussion essay in the readings. science." is "To Rice be True." about the history and philosophy "Popper wouldn't really care Patel said he also did not hear • Mesta, a Martel College sophomore, said the SA's Hedgehop- of scientific theory. (which physicist] was right so about the lecture until Wednesday per card was included in the U-Pass envelopes distributed to Anthropology Professor Chris much," Kelty said. "What his afternoon. students at the colleges. The Hedgehopper offers discounts at Kelty lectured and led a discussion theory was about was demarcating Forman said his office was not various stores. for the second in a series of forums the line between what is science as effective as it should have been • SA Internal Vice President Laura Kelley introduced three SA about the common readings. Tues- and what is not science." in communicating the excitement committee chairs. day night's discussion has been Kelty said Popper based this line of the readings and discussions. moved to this Wednesday and will on the idea of falsification. "We are new at this and are still Brown College sophomore Lindsay Zweiner is chair of the Sports be moderated by History Professor "If there's no way to prove a learning how to do it better," For- and Health committee. She said the committee will try to be Thomas Haskell. theory's false — if you can't figure man said. "I think we could have active at intramural sporting events and let colleges know the Dean of Undergraduates Robin out an experiment you can do or framed the readings so they were committee has grant money. Forman introduced common read- you can't ask a question or you more inviting and advertised more Brown senior Naweed Chowdhury is chair of the Academics com- ings — two sets of articles, each can't make an observation that effectively. We may have presented mittee. He said the committee will focus on lobbying for foreign with a common theme — as a way would allow you to prove it false the topics and speakers with a bit language requirements, working with faculty to develop Hispanic to encourage academic discussions — then it's not a scientific theory," too much reverence and haven't studies and business courses, and helping colleges begin aca- among students. New students Kelty said. made it easy to see how exciting demic fellows programs. were encouraged to read the Structured skepticism, ratio- these topics are and how relevant articles over the summer. The nality, truth and credit given to they are." Brown sophomore Paul Tucker is chair of the Student Life commit- topics of the articles are advo- scientists are all important parts of Forman said the common reading tee. Tucker said his ideas for the committee include developing cacy and objectivity, and scientific science, Kelty summarized. was not specifically directed at new iate-night on-campus food options. theory. Kelty then gave an overview of students, although they were encour- • Kelley, a Brown junior, announced SA new student representative Kelty said he agreed to give the philosophy of science since aged to do the reading. applications are available from college senators and online at the lecture because he hoped Popper, noting important contribu- "The goal was to welcome new sa.rice.edu. Applications are due to college senators Sept. 12 at it would stimulate intellectual tions from philosophers Thomas students especially into the Rice 12 a.m. conversation. Kuhn and Ian Hacking. community of scholars where • Jones College President Patricia Mahoney introduced a motion "One of the things that I find Kelty also gave an example timely and challenging issues are to change the SA's elections bylaws. One change would allow the very frustrating at Rice is the of a case involving the effect of discussed openly and thought- senate to choose whether to appoint the leader of a blanket-tax lack of intellectual climate and technology and theory on scien- fully by students and faculty," organization whose leader resigns or hold a special election. culture that happens day to day," tific work. Forman said. The second change woula allow the SA president to appoint a Kelty said. Scientists who first studied Forman said he wished the blanket-tax leader for no longer than 18 weeks. When Kelty asked the audience how certain white blood cells turnout for the event was higher who had read the articles, no hands destroy damaged or dysfunctional given that it offered students the SA Parliamentarian Chris Warrington said the temporary ap- were raised. cells used film and microcine- opportunity to interact with a pro- pointment would be used primarily when a leader resigns "This is supposed to be common matographic techniques to view fessor who is an expert in the area right before or during summer vacation. Warrington, a Jones reading," Kelty joked. "Not com- how the process works before being discussed. College sophomore, said the senate will vote on the changes mon entertainment hour." performing actual experiments "Especially given how exciting Sept. 11. Kelty began by discussing how in labs, Kelty said. the event was, I think it would have • Women's Resource Center Student Director Becky Thilo, a Hanszen widespread scientific theory is, Kelty discussed several simi- been great if more students had College senior, said the RWRC will hold an open house Sept. 13 giving examples of how it affects lar examples, such as the use of been there to enjoy it." in the Student Center. areas such as public policy and scanning tunneling microscopes University Professor Neal • Thilo. also the Honor Council chair, announced the council needs government. in conjunction with chemistry Lane will lead a discussion on to elect one sophomore representative and one senior represen- "I think regardless of the major and computer modeling, as well "Scientific Theory: The Practi- tative because members resigned over the summer. Nomination you go into or the field you get into, as the use of open-source com- tioner's Perspective" Sept. 14 at statements were accepted until Sept. 5, and elections were you're going to run into problems puter software for computer-based 7 p.m. Forman said there will be held in college commons Sept. 7. The council will hold an open related to the question of [scientific experiments. other events throughout the year Consensus Penalty Structure meeting Sept. 17 from 2-3 p.m. in Philosophy graduate student related to the common reading theory]," Kelty said. Duncan Hall. Kelty, who holds a Ph.D. in sci- Jacob Koleman said he enjoyed the and its topics. ence, technology and society, said lecture and found Kelty's interdis- "I hope this is the beginning of The next Student Association meeting will be Monday at 10 p.m. in the that even though he is neither a ciplinary approach intriguing. a long and exciting discussion," Farnsworth Pavilion. scientist nor an engineer, he can "He did a pretty good overview Forman said. follow discussion on topics such as of names in the history and philoso- string theory because he is familiar phy of science," Koleman said. with the scientific process. However, Koleman said he "1 understand what they're do- wished the discussion had been ing ... because I can see certain better publicized. aspects of what they're talking Koleman said he learned about about," Kelty said. "I can identify it the lecture in an e-mail Forman as a process that is familiar." sent to students and departments Important parts of the pro- Wednesday afternoon.

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Further information contact: BIG BURRITOS. biodesign Ostan f< > r d. ed u Ckipctle Tel: 650 736 1160 Fax: 650 724 8696 FANNIN & DRYDEN THE RICE THRESHER NEWS FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 8.2006 EMS The Rice Symphonic From page 1 around for an ambulance to arrive," "In some ways, it's a good thing Leslie said. because they can handle things on Music graduate student Jas- the spot," Allen said. "But I'd also mine Hatem said she is not worried like to know exactly all of the training about the new certification. they receive so I can feel absolutely "The only concern that I could comfortable about my fellow student Band sticking an IV in my arm." think of is possible allergic reac- tions to some of the new medica- Sunday said there is no fixed tions, but I'm sure that will be amount in the EMS budget for the Currently has openings for: addressed," Hatem said. transition to ALS certification. As of Wiess College sophomore Erika Tuesday, about $20,000 had been Allen said she has reservations spent on equipment and supplies about fellow students administer- and about $4,000 had been spent on medication. Trumpet ing ALS treatments. Trombone FACULTY SENATE The Faculty Senate met Wednesday. The following were discussed.

• Faculty Speaker Marj Corcoran, a physics professor, announced that Clarinet a vacant promotions and tenure committee position for a faculty member from the School of Humanities will be filled by Philosophy Professor Donald Morrison. Percussion A senate position for a humanities professor also is vacant. Political Science Professor Randy Stevenson will be the senate's parliamentarian. All instruments are welcome. • Corcoran nominated Mechanical Engineering Department Chair Yildiz Bayazitoglu for a one-year appointment to a vacant engi- Rehearsals are in the Band Hall located in the Basement neering senate seat. Bayazitoglu was approved unanimously. of the Hicks building (building 30 on the online campus • The senate unanimously re-elected Corcoran and Deputy Speaker Deborah Harter. map) every Thursday, except November 23 from 4- The senate also unanimously approved the executive committee 5:30PM. In the Spring semester rehearsals are slate of eight members as proposed. • The senate presented plaques of appreciation to Corcoran and Tuesdays and Thursdays, 4-5:30PM. Harter for their work last year. • Chairman of the Committee on the Rice Undergraduate Program Contact Chuck Throckmorton, Director. Chandler Davidson discussed the role of his committee. Office phone: 713-348-2346 Email: [email protected] As part of its accreditation process, the Southern Association of Colleges and Schools required Rice to establish more clearly defined standards of competency for students. In response. Rice formed a committee made up of faculty, two undergraduates and one alumnus, which is charged with creating a vision and a list of measurable learning criteria. The committee will gather input from faculty and students through a Web site and forums. Committee members will also meet witn academic deans to discuss programs and curriculum. Future committees will determine how well goals are being met and suggest curricular changes to the senate. Dean of Undergraduates Robin Forman said the process should take three years. • Director of Recruitment Eric Heineman gave a confidential pre YOV KNOM BY sentation on athletic admissions. • The senate agreed to revise the athletic admissions policy, which is ten years old. A committee will be formed to decide what issues the new policy should address. • The senate also agreed to review the criteria used in general ad- missions policies to accommodate a larger undergraduate body as specified in President Leebron's Vision for the Second Century.

helpdesk .rice .edu Come on in & interview for the HOTTEST job in town! Saturday, September 9th • Noon - 3pm Great Pay! flexible Hours! Tuition assistance, modeling opportunities & more!

Contact the IT Help Desk for computing assistance: Hooters of Humble Hooters of Northwest Freeway (281)446 9464 (713)659 4668 713-348-HELP(4357) or helpdesk@rice edu rf) H00 r00k Hoofers of S,i^ ^gar Land RICE (281)474-4629 (281)242-9464 Visit www.hoofersfexas.tom for directions THE RICE THRESHER ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 8,2006 weekly COURTESY TWIN/TONE STUDIOS Consuming endorsements

SCENE I have a love-hate relation- or car dealership stands as a substi- ship with branding in the en- tute for self esteem. Buying some- Thresher editors' tertainment world. Ostensibly, I thing can make you feel big and am against it. I complain inces- powerful, if only for a little while. recommendations for santly about how brands are And whether or not we should arts and entertainment ruining today's artistic care, we do notice around Houston through media. I cannot watch the way in which our September 15, 2006 a film without making friends dress and the a mental list of every kind of cars that they product that is given drive. The most popu- screen time, and I lar kids in my high FILM shudder when I hear school were not always R-Kelly rhyme "party" the most engaging Everybody Loves with "Bacardi." people or the most However, I am a talented — they were Federico Fellini hypocrite. When a often simply the most musician or movie star visibly wealthy. This revolutionary I respect endorses a In addition to the in- director's movies have won beverage, mp3 player, fluence that entertain- Replacements athletic shoe, microwave or ment has on our spending habits, international acclaim — and JL by Burton Dewitt FOR THE THRESHER whatever it often influences my music obsessed with products an Oscar. A must for any personal consumerism. It almost is also by nature disposable and Maybe it was just fate that finally spans the pre- and does not matter what the product shallow. Would Stevie Wonder be movie lover, Federico Fellini's the last true rock and roll post-major label recordings of is or whether or not I need it, I remembered if he would have sung movies will delight band was not anthologized the Replacements. And for a suddenly realize that I want it, and about, "My cherie amour, lovely as a Heineken," or if the Rolling Stones and entertain. until 15 years after its band so original, a band that I know it is because a celebrity I demise, giving a new genera- did everything wrong and still respect believes in its value. had included a shout out to Gucci See 8 1/2 Saturday at 7 p.m. tion of music fans a chance claimed authorship of some A young Tom Cruise in Risky in "Street Fighting Man?" to acquaint themselves with of the best rock music ever Business convinced me to pay I want to be clear that I am not The Museum of Fine Arts, mid-1980s indie glory. Or recorded — a band that too much for a pair of Ray-Ban blaming contemporary music or sunglasses. John Ixnnon told Houston maybe it just took 15 years dominated 1980s college movies for fueling irresponsible for fans to fully appreciate a me I wanted an Epiphone electric spending habits or making our 1001 Bissonnet Street radio alongside R.E.M. and guitar, while Weezer frontman culture more greedy and status- void that can no longer be re- www.mfah.org/films Husker Du — the recording Rivers Cuomo argued me into obsessed. As much as entertain- placed. Either way, Don't You industry's previous oversight favoring a Fender Stratocaster. ment and art can influence the Know Who I Think I Was was a damned shame. Perhaps most serious is my way we live, it is also a reflection sneaker problem. RUN-D.M.C. of our own reality. If we are ob- CONCERTS THE BAND persevered in offstage brilliance as goaded me into buying my first sessed with products, then our well as onstage floppery, and the pair of Adidas Superstars, and it entertainment will be too. Does Gnarls In 1979, Paul Westerberg strapped Replacements released Let It Be in has been downhill ever since. I To be fair, product placement on a guitar and started singing. Bob 1984 — an album so innovative that have bought four pairs of Nikes in is not a new phenomenon. In the Barkley drive you Stinson joined him on guitar, and Sire Records signed them despite the last month. I would appreciate original Superman movie, re- crazy? Possibly. Bob's little brother Tommy — then countless bombed gigs. an intervention. leased in 1978, Christopher Reeve only 12 — picked up a bass. Chris The Replacements released four I think pretty much every devours a large bowl of Cheerios See him with thine own eyes at Mars chimed in on drums. Prefer- albums for Sire Records, starting American makes choices based on while mugging for the camera. ring to have a good time rather with 1985's Tim. Their final Sire similar criteria, either consciously Steven Spielberg's loveable E.T. Warehouse Live this Thursday than actually being good, the band album,/!// Shook Down, was released or subconsciously. To an extent, sold Reese's Pieces to an entire at 9 p.m. is famous for holding drunken or in September 1990 and only featured unfortunately, people appear to generation of children. the four 'Mats playing together as a be what they buy. In our world, We spend a huge fraction of RSVP online at high rehearsals. They went through multiple appellations before settling whole on one track — the appropri- purchase power can often be our time thinking about brands, www.scionevents.com. Must be on the Replacements, and the band ately titled "Attitude." I>ater that year, substituted for personality, and branding ourselves and judging 21 or older to attend. acquired the nickname "The 'Mats' the band broke up. personality can also be augmented others by their possessions. So if as a result of accidentally being re- by owning the right things. brands are conspicuously absent Warehouse Live ferred to as "The Placemats." THE COMPILATION Radio rap has taken this from entertainment, it can detract When the Replacements per- twisted philosophy to its logical from the entertainment's realism. 813 Saint Emanuel St. formed, they were often belliger- Until now, the Replacements extreme. The formula for hip-hop The problem as I see it is that ently drunk and purposely put on lacked a defining compilation. Their success is simple and has barely when commercial industries have lousy shows. Early in the band's All for Nothing/Nothing for All was changed in the last ten years. too great an influence on produc- career, Westerberg and company limited to the band's later Sire Records Most popular hip-hop lyrics re- tion, consumables become the ART performed as The Impediments material and left out their far superior semble a slant-rhymed catalog star of the show. There is a clear and were blacklisted after their Twin/Tone cuts. of liquor and clothing companies. difference between the inclusion DiverseWorks: first gig for raucous behavior. The But this summer, Rhino records Perhaps most indicative of this of a brand so that the audience is band's christening as 'Hie Replace- put together a compilation that spans trend is the hook from Yung Joe's not distracted and the inclusion of Run For ments only occurred so they could not only the band's Sire material but summer hit "It's Goin Down." a brand to sell a product. Your Lives! trick club owners into letting them also the earlier Twin/Tone songs. The Georgia rapper asks that The problem is not going to play again. And somehow, the white-collar execs his listeners, "Meet [him] in the go away, so we must react simply The sky is falling! Or at least Even after the'MciLb made a name in charge of mixing the tracks actu- mall / It's goin' down." by staying aware of the influence ally captured the 'Mats punk-rock The mall. Yung Joe? For me, that entertainment has over our it seems like it with the for themselves among recording executives — although, admittedly, essence perfectly. the mall evokes images of herds of purchases. In the meantime I recent natural and unnatural it was often hard to keep track of Instead of just piling in all 16 middle school students idling out- would appreciate it if someone disasters around the world. what that name was — they still singles the band released from 1981 side Sbarro with greasy slices of confiscated my debit card before 1 seemed self-destructive on stage. to 1991, they chose 10 singles and 8 pizza. It does not seem like a place overdraw buying more kicks. Run for Your Lives! showcases When opening for K.E.M. in 1983, lesser-known album cuts for Don't where anything "goes down," local and internation artists' they almost got kicked off the tour You Know Who I Think I Was: The apart from conspicuous and copi- Bryce Gray is a Jones College for performing drunken covers in Best of The Replacements, as well ous consumption. But that is the junior and assistant arts and interpretations of recent lieu of their critically acclaimed as two new songs that the three point. For many, going to the mall entertainment editor. natural and political disasters. original material. However, they See REPLACEMENTS, page 9 It opens today as part of DiverseWorks' annual Village's Istanbul Grill triumphs in Turkish scene, cuisine Downtown Stomp Around. Nestled in the Rice Village popular and flattering dish ofTurkish On the waiter's recommendation, DiverseWorks between little Woodrow's and Hie Cuisine," reads the menu, "is made we accompanied this appetizer with 1117 East Freeway Mail Room, this gem of Turkish culi- with tender slices of Doner kebab lay- a Mantar — mushrooms stuffed ISTANBUL GRILL nary traditions brims with ambiance ered on a bed of diced, butter-roasted with ricotta cheese in a deliously AND DELI www.diverseworks.org/ and out-of-the-ordinary menu selec- pide bread surrounded with yogurt unique sauce—and the house-made calendar/calendar.shtml tions. A vine-covered arch marks the and topped with our own sauce." hummus, which is served with fluffy • • • • of five entrance to leafy outdoor seating. and freshly made bread instead of There,in thelightbreezeofantique the dried-out pitas found at many 5613 Morningside Dr. Mediterranean restaurants. ceiling fans, under the shade of large Rachel between University In addition to our Iskender entree, umbrellas, are macrame-upholstered Marcus & Boulevard and Times Drive chairs and wooden tables. Turkish we feasted on the Doner Sandwich. jig music plays softly, contributing | Theodora Istanbul's version of the traditional (713) 526-2800 to the distant-lands atmosphere. Carson gyro, which the menu lauded as a "Great classic of Turkish cuisine Our charming Hours: 11 a.m. - 10 p.m. server, whose featuring thin slabs of lamb and Tuesday through Sunday warmth comple- Mouths watering, seduced by the beef combination marinated with mented the restau- lush description, we hastily ordered our own secret blend of seasoning, Closed Mondays rant's charm impec- this and a round of appetizers, priced slowly grilled on a vertical skewer cably, described the reasonably at about $4 each. Entrees and thinly sliced." RACHEL AND THE0 dishes in a thick, run $8- $9, and most are served with A quick glance behind the cashier Turkish accent. a rice and purple-cabbage salad. To counter confirms this claim. There RECOMMEND The menu is full begin, we noshed on the PaUatican in all its splendor is a floor-to-ceiling Iskender Kebab $10.49 of ethnic goodies. In Salata—an eggplant puree seasoned hunk of lamb turning on a spit. It Pattatican Salata 3.29 sits in front of large display cases particular, the Isk- with lemon and tahini—that outper- Baklava 1.29 ender Kebabcaught forms the baba ghannouj anywhere brimming with slabs of meat on our eyes. "This most else in the Village. See ISTANBUL, page 8 RICE THRESHER FRIDAY. SEPTEMBER 8

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Ethan Feuer ISTANBUL Istanbul Griii From page 7

skewers — the Doner kebabs, as afternoon were undoubtedly the At only $4, however, the disappoint- well as chicken and other cubic meat creamy Patlatican Salata and the ment was not a major setback. on sticks. On customers' requests, honey-soaked Baklava, served with As for the ultimate test of any kebabs are plucked from the case three dainty forks and as flaky as it Mediterranean restaurant, the gyro and tossed in a large brick oven. was syrupy. sandwich, we found ourselves under- The indoor seating has the feel The Ezme Salata, which bears a whelmed. Inside the pita, the shred- of a Turkish grandmother's kitchen, striking similarity to pico de gallo, ded lamb bits were exjx»rtly seasoned complete with blue checkered was well-spiced but seemed out of but a bit dry — a problem unaided tablecloths topped with bright-blue place in the shadow of the Patlatican by the puny serving of thin yogurt eyeballs, traditionally used to ward and Iskender.The vegetarian Lacha- sauce on the side. The mediocre pita off bad luck. On the walls hang man, a crispy flatbread covered in was even more disappointing in con- bronze medallions, instruments a tomato-heavy vegetable mixture, trast to the still-warm-from-the-oven made of gourds, and even more tasted like a salsa-coated tortilla sesame bread along with the thyme

eyeball-centric artwork. chip — those who do not enjoy and olive oil dip. thankfully served NICOLAS OVERBY/THRESHER Our favorite dishes of the parsley should not order this dish. with all appetizers. Istanbul Grill and Deli offers an outdoorsy atmosphere and Turkish treats. Love is the most wonderful thing in the world. We just want to help keep it that way. JPMorqanChase (j

• Birth control ty)[|x§<®rai)Brog3 Giwsroft© • Emergency contraception September 11 • Tests & treatments for sexually transmitted infections Robocode Contest Starts, www.jprohocode.com

• Pregnancy tests September 29

• Well-woman exams TGIF (a). Willy's Pub. Bring a resume for free food!

October 24 Planned Parenthood of Houston and Southeast Texas, Inc. A plan you can love with. On-Campus Presentation. Free food (not pizza).

1.800.230.PLAN October 25 On-Campus Interviews. pphouston.org Submission deadline - October 14 October 2 7 sio off your Robocode Contest Ends. next office visit! November 3 (Offer good for office visit only. Not good Contest Winners Announced - with real prizes for supplies or with any other discount.) THE RICE THRESHER ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 8, 2006 REPLACEMENTS From page 7

surviving band members re- one of the three songs selected united to record. The choices rre to represent Pleased to Meet Me, uniformly exceptional. The 'Mats' second Sire album. The acoustic guitar solo "Skyway," 'don't you know who i a meaningless two-minute ditty think i was' about Minneapolis transportation, by the replacements makes the compilation instead of the much more powerful and flat- rating •••offive out better "TTie Ledge." However, such a mistake is forgettable, as Two tracks from The Replace- neither song is that important to ments' debut album kick oiiDon't The Replacements' history. You Know, and then only one The album breezes through cut from the Stink E.P. follows. the band's final two albums, tak- The curt coverage of the band's ing two from the almost-break- earlier hardcore punk material through and decidedly lousy suits the Replacements' history: Don't Tell a Soul, including the Their image as just another Clash band's first and only Hot 100 hit, knockoff quickly receded as the pathetic "I'll Be You," which Westerberg matured as a song- peaked at a mere #51 in 1989. writer and a singer. It takes iust one from All Shook Don't You Know also features Down, which was originally the two best tracks from the meant to be a solo album by Paul band's second LP. Hootenanny, Westerberg and sounded noth- "Color Me Impressed" and ing like anything else the band "Within Your Reach." However, ever recorded. Both albums and COURTESY WARNER BROS PICTURES it missteps in relegating Let It Be their representative songs sound Sister Summerisle (Ellen Burstyn) parades through a field in The Wicker Man in a failed attempt at a creepy costume. to only three tracks, while giving dated, having been heavily pop four to Tim, an album equal in influenced, and are easy skips critical prestige — but not in on this compilation. New Wicker Man shames cult classic namesake historical significance. However, iwo new songs and 'Hie Let It Be sampling com- an incredibly detailed set of bio- by Tasha Chemplavil The letter takes Malus to the and writing are painfully artificial prises three similarly structured graphical liner notes also greet THRESHER STAFF ingeniously named island of Sum- and predictable. Unlike the campy and themed songs, and this unfair 'Mats fans when they open Don Y A good horror movie should mersisle, which houses a matriarchal British original, LaBute's new selection hides the true brilliance You Know. Surprisingly, the new keep its audience members on the society that uses men for little more Wicker Man is bored with itself, of the band in its finest hour. "I cuts sound like the band of old, edge of their seats, sweaty hands than breeding stock. This strange and it shows. Will I )are," which features a guest although neither song is good gripping plastic armrests and eyes premise seems ripe with promise This film delivers neither sus- guitar solo by R.E.M.'s Pete Buck, enough to compete with the glory locked to the screen. A good horror forafeminazi, alternate-universe, but pense nor horror. Most viewers adds no value to Don't You Know of Let It Be. movie should have an interesting LaBute has less glamorous — and will find themselves laughing at the and should have been replaced "Message to the Boys" is a protagonist, a double dose of tension less developed — plans. Attack of the 50-Foot Woman-quality with a more eclectic track from very good addition, showing off and a mysterious and sadistic killer. Introducing the feminine twist acting and poorly written dialogue Let It Be, such as the piano-driven some warmer Westerberg lyrics Director Neil LaBute's 'Ihe Wicker to the remake should have been a instead of recoiling in terror. And, "Androgynous" or the 'Mats' stun- and even garnering some college Man fails to meet any of these re- progressive move. The original Brit- disappointingly, the symbolic Wicker ning garage rock cover of KISS's rock radio time. "Pool & Dive" is quirements and ends up a pathetic- ish film dealt with a less Amazonian Man himself garners little more "Black Diamond." not as strong, but it picks up where excuse for a B-list horror film. pagan society, and Malus' character than a passing mention — he is Rhino's biggest faux pas in "Message to the Boys" leaves off spent the film confronting situations revealed too late in the film to too compiling Don't You Know conies and screws a secure lid over one 'the wicker man' that challenged his Christian funda- little fanfare. in tbe treatment of the 'Mats of the best bands of all time. mentalist belief system. Switching Despite the fact that the film is first major label release, Tim. The album is only worth the Jf rating • of five out religious conflicts with gender centered on a female-run society, fhe album never resounded purchase price if you are not now playing at AMC and ones could have made a thoughtful Ihe Wicker Man ironically denigrates with die-hard Replacements fans sure if you want to get into The Wr ' Edwards theaters film. Instead, this new Wicker Man's feminist ideals with its portrayal of because it lacked the raw energy Replacements—or if you are just cultural contrivance is a straw-man women as evil, heartless creatures. of 1st It Be. but it receives four a diehard fan trying to complete 'Ihe Wicker Man, a remake of the distraction from the film's innumer- They lie, they murder and they cuts on Don't You Know. The your collection. People who 1973 British cult classic of the same able plot holes. enslave. They even poison the im- compilation includes "Bastards already own the studio albums name, stars National Treasure's Nico- As Malus investigates Rowan's pressionable minds of the younger of Young," "Left of the Dial" and would be better served to just las Cage as Edward Malus, a traffic- disappearance, he tries and fails to female generation with male-bash- "Here Comes a Regular," the last download the two new songs, cop who receives a letter from his elicit information from the women ing, distorted paradigms. of which stupidly leads off 7Y/n on which would cost much less than ex-fiancee, Willow Woodward (Flight- on the island, and he nearly gets Malus' frustrating ineptitude, the this compilation although it is the the $14.99 disc price. plans Kate Beahan) to help find her himself killed several times. For overarching predictability of the plot, closing track on the album. While Either way, it is a very good daughter, Rowan (KVs Erika-Shaye example, he runs into the island's and the absurdly unfeminist colony these songs arguably deserve the compilation, which is rare in this (iair), who mysteriously disappeared. apiary — completely disregarding make The Wicker Man a gigantic- recognition, the last Tim cut is the day of over-commercialization. Malus, haunted by flashbacks to a his supposedly deadly allergy to waste of time and money. Rent the goofy "Kiss Me on the Bus" and It isn't perfect, but it definitely recent traumatic car crash, is on sab- bees — gets strung numerous British original if you are in the surely does not merit preserva- isn't embarrassing. And after batical and decides to investigate the times and somehow miraculously mood for a good horror movie. Go tion in a best-of album. another 15 years, it will hardly alleged kidnapping. What a realistic survives. Each scene is more ri- to the theater if you want to pay $9 Rhino messes up again in be replaceable. beginning... yeah, right. diculous than the last: The pacing for a nap. ENGI/NSCI 309: Leadership Communication

Meets T-ThM 00-5:30 p.m. beer + bikes + balloons Fall Semester - first 10 Weeks i In ENGI/NSCI 309, science and engineering * MI students learn how to lead companies and communities through excellence in Are you i rue res led in taking el large oj Rice's largest campus-wide communication. Students will improve their activity?? If you answered, "YES!," then apply to be the writing and speaking while investigating organizations and their leaders. 2007 Beer Bike Coordinators'

This 10-week, two-credit course is a feasible addition to a busy schedule. |p Applications are available NOW in the Clubs Office! Teams are encouraged to apply together. I he deadline for submitting 7 Instructor: Dr. Deborah Barrett an application is Wednesday, September 2 th by 5pm.

Contact: [email protected] Additional information may be obtained by contacting Holly Williams, 713-348-6141 Assistant Director of Student Activities, at \5115 or holly\v(a rice.edu. Interviews will be scheduled upon receipt of application. SPONSORED BY THE CAIN PROJECT IN ENGINEERING AND PROFESSIONAL COMMUNICATION THE RICE THRESHER ADVERTISEMENT FRIDAY. SEPTEMBER 1,2006

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m •HlKP.l orts Page 11 THE RICE THRESHER Friday, September 8, 2006 " THRESHER SPORTS/commentary Rice should embrace Owls' upset bid falls an extra point short by Nathan Bledsoe new football culture THRKSHKR KD1TORIAI. STAFF The football team impressed fans and I-ast Saturday night, real college football — you know, critics alike last Saturday with a string of the body-painted, alklay-af fair football—descended on the 30 unanswered points in it's first game Rice campus like, well, an angry War Owl screeching into under new head coach Todd Graham. battle. Rice students got a glimpse of one of the few things However, Rice fell late to the University big universities have worth envying: a football culture. of Houston 31-30 in front of a crowd of For the first time in recent 23,352 at Rice Stadium. memory, droves of Rice students The Owls (0-1) now look to Saturday showed up for a game at Rice night in Pasadena, Calif, where they face Stadium, and a bunch of them the University of California-Los Angeles showed up forthetailgate parties at the Rose Bowl to begin their difficult beforehand. Wee students were out-of-conference schedule. 'Hie Bruins out throwing Nerf footballs, (1-0) are coming off a 31-0 victory over draining car batteries listening the University of Utah. I-ast year, UC1A to loud music, and enjoying the defeated Rice H3-21 at the Rose Bowl, but football staple of burgers and ice both the leading rusher and passer from cold ... sodas. Nathan the 2005 Bruin squad have graduated. A grand total of 1,193 st udent s Bledsoe New quarterback Ben Olsen won Pac- entered the gates of historic Rice 10 Offensive Player of the Week honors Stadium. That may not sound like a lot when you compare for his 318-yard, 3 touchdown passing us to the University of Texas. If based upon undergraduate performance over Utah. enrollment, however, just under 45 percent of the student Graham said the UCIA offense body attended the game. Ibis figure can be viewed as an should be a more conservative, run-ori- anomaly and a highlight — or as a building block to even ented scheme as opposed to the Cougars' higherattendance. Were we as Rice students to get together pass-based offense. MARSHALL ROBINSON/THRESHER Sophomore linebacker Brian Raines attempts to tackle University of Houston quarter- and focus on bringing out more students, football could "[This week we face] more of a back Kevin Kolb during the Owls' opening game Sept. 3. The Owls travel to Pasadena, remain the primary social event of fall Saturday afternoons. conventional type of offense," Graham Calif, this weekend to take on the UCLA Bruins at the Rose Bowl. The more people show up to football games, the more said. "We're going to have to stop the people feel compelled to join their friends in attendance. run, [because] they're going to try to against the Bruins, Rice must string Kolb for a 13-yard loss. The sack forced Nobody has to become a rabid supporter to enjoy himself run it right at us." together offensive drives long enough to a UH punt, a 36-yarder by Cougar punter at football games, as Saturday demonstrated. The Utes fared well against the Bruin keep its undersized defense from spend- Justin Laird to the Rice 49. Although the game ended in gut-wrenching defeat rushing attack, allowing just 2.6 yards ing too much time on the field. Following Rice's second possession, against bitter rival University of Ifouston, the atmosphere per carry, Their main problem, though, Against UH, the Owls had trouble also a three-and-out, UH scored on a all day and throughout the game was fun and should not was third down on offense. Utah failed to mounting any kind of attack early. Ju- 10-play drive ending with a 7-yard touch- be lost. Hopefully, those students who really enjoyed convert a single third down attempt forthe nior Luke Juist's opening kickoff was down scamper by tailback Jackie Battle, themselves light to make it the groundwork for a social duration of the game. To have a chance returned by Anthony Alridge to the making the score 14-0 UH with 2:25 left scene connected to, but not dependant upon, football. 'The Rice 24 behind a pair of questionable in the first quarter. college experience," that mythical creature, often finds UT TICKET INFO blocks — one at the very beginning of Once Rice received the ensuing itself somehow connected to athletics and the peripherals the runback. UH took advantage of the kickoff, the feel of the game changed of sporting events, pre-game preparations and recreation Student tickets for the Sept. field position by scoring on its fourth play, drastically, with the offense catching fire paired with post-game festivities. Athletic events make for 16 game against the University a 6-yard toss from quarterback Kevin for 27 points to close the first half. The instant conversation, whether or not the people conversing of Texas will be on sale Monday- Kolb to receiver Jeron Harvey. On their first scoring drive was capped by a 13- have any understanding of the game at hand. Sept. llthrough Friday Sept. 15, subsequent drives, the Owls struggled yard touchdown reception by sophomore As the football program at Rice evolves, so too should to get things going offensively, gaining wideout Jarrett Dillard and was high- from 8:30 a.m-5 p.m. Students the football culture. The colleges can continue to tailgate, just one lirst down in their first two lighted by the opening play, a 52-yard run are encouraged to take the light and groups like Rice Rugby Alumni can continue to pump offensive possessions. by senior running back Quentin Smith funds into gigantic keg-chilling machines and barbecue pits. rail to Reliant Stadium since lIH's second offensive possession was to the UH 25. Smith had huge numbers Students, as they did on Saturday, can walk into the stadium the athletic department will not a spectacular one for the Rice defense, a against the Cougars, with 188 total yards and receive a handout with some cheers and some heckling provide transportation. three-and-out highlighted by freshman and three touchdowns. fodder to get them into the game. And, Rice students have Andrew Sendejo's third-down sack of See FOOTBALL page 13 an opportunity to make new, lasting, football traditions. Tliis new team may be faced with struggles, but students should focus on the big picture and continue to support the team and attend the games. Most universities Volleyball wins Hyatt Regency/Rice Invitational start winning first and then a football atmosphere is born. emerged strongly for the home team, Interestingly enough, though, this atmosphere usually picks by Dylan Farmer outside hitter, began her dominance up momentum of its own and far outlasts the winning days early, notching four of her game-high racking up match-high numbers with 22 THRKSHKR KDITORIAI. STAFF of the program, as people become so infatuated with the 18 kills in the Owls' first five points of kills and 21 digs. camaraderie and good food that winning can, at times, be Hie volleyball team made the most of the match. Fellow sophomore Jessica "1 just think I was really excited about simply a compliment. Students who attend a university at its home-court advantage this weekend May assisted Morgan with 10 kills of our first home tournament," Morgan the peak of athletic success should not get to have all the in the Holiday Inn Select/Rice Invita- her own, and junior setter Rachel Lopez said. "Everyone played really well, and fun — those involved in the formative years should build tional, riding the stellar play of tourna- posted 41 assists. that made it easier for me to focus and some memories as well. ment MVP Karyn Morgan to a victory "It was good to see [Morgan] rise to do my part." Rice has a unique combination of intimate size and I )ivi- last weekend at Autry Court. The Owls the occasion," head coach Genny Volpe As a team. Rice posted 14 blocks, and sion I athletics — Rice has the second-smallest enrollment returned to the floor Wednesday for a said. "She stepped up her offense, and Kirk added 20digs. However, despite the of any university with a Division I-A football program. This quick three-set victory over McNeese her hitting efficiency improved dramati- impressive efforts of freshman middle size and the layout of Rice Stadium put students a few feet State University, improving the team's cally from last weekend. She's also taking blocker Natalie Bogan, who had 17 kills, from the opponents' sideline and much closer to the action record to 4-3 on the season. charge in the back row defensively and and freshman outside hitter Jennifer than is standard at this level of competition. By pairing what This weekend, the Owls travel to continuing to be very aggressive." McClean, who had 21 digs, the offense is often considered a "big school" event with our small Tucsan, Ariz, to compete in the Four The defense stepped up well, stifling failed at crucial times. school atmosphere, every individual is more important Points Sheraton Wildcat Classic. They a third-game I )ePaul run with key blocks In the third game against ITSA, with and involved in the magic of college football than at our open play today against Montana State from Lopez and senior middle blocker the match tied 1-1, Rice had a hitting state school counterpart. Rice students should do every- University at 2:30 p.m., and face Bradley Tessa Kuykendall. Rice's front line held percentage of zero, dropping six straight thing possible to make War Owl Saturdays a highlight of and No. 21 Arizona tomorrow afternoon. the Blue Demons to an abysmal .084 points to lose the game 30-25. In the decid- campus life, a common thread that unites the students of Rice stormed into Friday evening's hitting percentage for the match, and ing fifth game, the Owls opened up a 5-1 this special university. tournament-opening match with DePaul junior libero Yvette Kirk had a team- lead, but due to Rice's .038 percentage, University and convincingly swept the high 12 digs. ITSA climbed back to win 16-14. Nathan Bledsoe is a h>vett College sophomore, calendar Blue Demons 30-27,30-20,30-19 in three In the Owls' second match, a heart- Volpe said UTSA was able to take editor, and football editor rapid sets and only an hour and a half breaking five-set loss to the University advantage of lapses in Rice's focus. of game time. Morgan, a sophomore of Texas at San Antonio, Morgan again See VOLLEYBALL page 14 WL00K - THE WEEK IN SPORTS Friday 9/8 7 p.m. Soccer vs. Houston Baptist (Rice Track/Soccer Stadium) BY THE NUMBERS All Day Men's Tennis at Rice Invitational (Jake Hess Tennis Stadium) Senior running back Quinton Smith gained Saturday 9/9 8:20 a.m. Cross Country at Rice Invitational (Rice Track/Soccer Stadium) All Day Men's Tennis at Rice Invitational (Jake Hess Tennis Stadium) 108 7 p.m. Soccer vs. University of Texas (Rice Track/Soccer Stadium) Sunday 9/10 net rushing yards in last Saturday's loss to Houston. 12 more All Day Men's Tennis at Rice Invitational (Jake Hess Tennis Stadium) rushing yards than the entire Cougar offense. Wednesday 9/13 7 p.m. Soccer vs. Texas Southern (Rice Track/Soccer Stadium) THE RICE THRESHER SPOFTS FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 8,2006 CROSS COUNTRY 2006 LAYOUT BY STEPHEN WHITFIELD

Women poised to defend C-US A title Wells, Daniels, incoming freshmen should offset loss of top scorers

Junior Callie Wells said she looks distance runners and it could change by Stephen Whitfield forward to starting the season in the whole complexion of a team." THRESHER EDITORIAL STAFF front of her home crowd. The Owls enter the season with- Last year, the women's cross "For me, it's really exciting to out three of their five scorers from country team had its most successful be racing at home with my parents last year's C-USA meet: Gorry, the season in over a decade, notching ... out there," Wells said. "Hope- 2004 Western Athletic Conference an easy victory in the Conference fully a lot of Rice people will be champion who was 1.35 seconds USA Championships and competing out there. I'm excited to see them from duplicating the feat in C-USA in the NCAA Championships for watch our team." last year, Anna Reeve (Will Rice only the third time in team history. '06) and Sarah Yoder (Baker '06), a Despite the loss of its top scorer from THIS WEEKEND top-25 finisher at the NCAA Cham- last year's championship team, Kate pionships last year. However, he team is in good shape. Wells, who Gorry (Lovett '06) and some improved Men's and women's cross competition in the conference, Rice is placed a close third at C-USA, is the country host Rice Invitational in great position to repeat Owls' top returning scorer. Another junior, Marissa Daniels, the Owls' The Owls will begin the season Where: Rice Track/Soccer only top-five finisher at the regional at the Rice Invitational tomorrow at Stadium 8:20 a.m. at the Rice Track/Soccer meet, should also be a major factor in conference this season. Sopho- Stadium. Rice has won all but one When: Saturday at 8:20 a.m. of these meets since 1992, but this more I^a Garcia is the only other year's meet should be one of the returning top-20 finisher from the most competitive in years. Teams A couple of teams in C-USA C-USA meet. such as Southern Methodist Univer- should challenge Rice this year. Wells said she is excited about sity, the third-place finisher at last SMU returns almost all of its Rice's prospects. year's C-USA title meet, and Lamar runners from last year's squad. "So far, I think it's looking good for University, the fourth-place finisher The biggest challenge, however, our team," Wells said. "Our return- at the NCAA South Central regional should come from the University of ing runners ... got a lot of mileage meet, will compete. Head coach Jim Alabama-Birmingham. The Blazers, and are a lot stronger than they had Bevan said the Rice Invitational is an who finished second at C-USA last been. Overall, I think we're as strong opportunity for the runners to get year, return all of their five scor- or stronger than last year." into racing form. ers, including defending individual The team should also receive a "We've got to get started, and champion Elizabeth Ambrus. UAB's huge boost from its incoming freshman we've got to learn how to race again," performance was impressive given class. One newcomer, Nicole Mericle, . ... y...... Bevan said. "For a lot of these young that most of their points came from won four straight individual crosscoun- ladies, it's been four months since underclassmen who should only try titles for the John Cooper School Sophomore Colby Keithan is one of two returning Rice runners who improve. No other team in the con- in the Woodlands. Another freshman, they've run a race. That's a long time placed in the top 20 at last year's C-USA championship meet. Including ference, except Tulsa University, Brittany Williams, finished runner-up in between races. Training is good, this weekend's Rice Invitational, the Owls will only compete in three to Mericle at the SPC cross country but racing is different. ... Racing is should be highly competitive this races before heading to this year's C-USA meet in Greenville, N.C. a whole other animal." year, though Bevan said any team championships last year. Bevan said the The Owls will look at this meet could change its fortune with new incoming freshmen and the returning as a tune-up for the Conference USA recruits. runners could prove to be a powerful Championship meet, which will take "The one thing about our sport is combination. New runners hold the key See FIRST, page 14 place Oct. 28 in Greenville, N.C. that you could bring in four really good to success for men's team

by Stephen Whitfield five out of the past six. Winning the meet, however, will not be THRESHER EDITORIAL STAFF Rice's main goal this year. The Afterasecond-placefinishatthe Rice Invitational, along with the The Office of the Dean of Undergraduates Presents Conference USA championship other two meets on the schedule, meet last season, the men's cross is preparation for the C-USA country team has a tough road Championship meet Oct. 28 in CONVERSATIONS ON THE ahead in 2006. A considerably Greenville, N.C. With that date less experienced team than the looming only eight weeks from one that challenged for the title the start of the season, the team COMMON READING last year, Rice will need help from will make sure that each runner other top-tier teams in C-USA and is healthy and in peak competitive from its own first-year runners if form in time for the championship it hopes to win a championship meet. Junior Charles Hampton Sept, 13: Thomas Haskell, Samuel G. McCann this year. The path to the C-USA said the team will not lose focus Championships begins tomorrow on itslong-term objective, despite Professor of History: A Conversation on at 8:20a.m. at the Rice Invitational, the pressure to perform well. which will take place in and "You want to put out your around the Rice Track/Soccer best performance for (the fans] Objectivity and the University (7:00pm, McMurtry Stadium. because it's the only opportunity The only home meet of the that they'll get to see you run," Auditorium) season for the Owls, the Rice Hampton said. "On the same Invitational is unique because token, you have to take it for what the collegiate competition is it is. It is an early-season meet that preceded by a two-mile "yahoo" prepares you for the ones later on. race — open to the public — in As much excitement as we have Sept. 14: Neal Lane, Malcolm Gillis University which the runners traditionally for this, we have to keep in mind yell "yahoo" after the opening what the real goal is." Professor and Professor of Physics and Astronomy: gun. The "yahoo" race will start Like last year, C-USA figures 64 at 7:30 a.m. to be a three-team conference, Scientific Theory: The Practitioner's Head coach Jon Warren (Jones with the University of Texas-El '88) said he will not approach the Paso, Tulsa University and Rice Perspective" (7:00pm, McMurtry Auditorium) Rice Invitational too seriously. being the only three teams with "Since we've only had two a realistic shot at the title. The weeks of practice, we're really Miners are this year's favorite. trying to see where we're at," I^ast year's runaway champion, Warren said. "This meet will UTEP lost only one runner be a reflection of what they did from a squad that had five of *To take full advantage of this opportunity, please refer to the Common over the summer rather than the top ten individual finishes what they've done since they've at the conference meet. One of Reading at http://rieeoweek.com/undergrad.cfm been here. In some ways, it's no those runners, Patrick Matgi, different from a scrimmage in won the individual title with the *For more information, contact Matt Taylor fx4997; [email protected]) soccer or football, but at the same fourth-fastest time in conference time we are lining up and racing history. All of Tulsa's top three other teams." runners from last year, including The Owls have won this two top-ten finishers, return to a meet three straight years and See SECOND, page 14 THE RICE THRESHER SPORTS FRIDAY, SEPETEMBER 8, 2006 13 Soccer hosts eighth-ranked Texas Sunday

By Matt McCabe "We know that [Texas is] a after beating multiple defenders in THKKSHKK STAH good team," Huston said. "We're the 83rd minute. Army would add going to have to take our 'A' a late goal in the 89th minute but With a win and a tie on the game. But I think [our| team is was unable to score again. road last week, the soccer team is the best team [Rice has] had yet, "I think it says a lot about us as off to its best start in the six-year and when they're on, they ... can a team that we can go out on the history of the program with a 3-0- beat anyone." road and win like we do at home," 1 record. However, the toughest Rice came away with a solid 2-1 Scott said. test of the regular season will win against Army (2-2) Sept. 1 and Rice moved on to face Penn in come this Sunday at 7 p.m. when managed a scoreless tie against the the Quakers' season opener. After Rice takes on the eighth-ranked University of Pennsylvania Monday the 90 minutes of regulation, the m University of Texas at the Rice during its northeast road trip. teams battled to a scoreless tie in Track/Soccer Stadium. Huston said she was pleased two 15-minute overtime periods. with the results. "We went in against Penn, and we THIS WEEKEND "The girls did a great job," didn't play our best soccer, but we Huston said. "We had played did create a number of opportuni- Soccer hosts HBU and Texas Army twice before [in previous ties," Huston said. "We just could seasons], and both had been one- not finish to save our lives. It was a Where: Rice Track/Soccer goal games, but this year's Army bit frustrating, but it wasn't like we Stadium team was better than Army teams went out and played poorly." of the past." In the game, starting goal- When: Friday at 7 p.m. The freshmen class emerged keeper Amy McClintock stopped all six of Penn's shots on goal Sunday at 7 p.m. against Army with forward/mid- fielder Katelyn Ostendorf and for- to support the Rice defense. ward Erin Scott both finding the Entering the season, goalkeep- "We're going to have to go out back of the net. Rice jumped on the ing was a big question mark, but * and play our best game for 90 min- Black Knights early when fresh- McClintock is settling into her utes," head coach Chris Huston man defender Kellen Schugart role as a starter after three sea- said. "That's the one thing that I and senior defender Laura Bar- sons as a backup. think we've struggled with this ber controlled a loose ball and "She's made some great saves season. We haven't been able to play combined to find Ostendorf for that have kept us in games," Huston a complete game together." the goal in the 33rd minute. The said. "Getting our back five all on the Before facing UT (2-1), the game remained 1-0 in the Owls' same page—the four defenders and Owls will take on Houston Baptist favor until Scott scored unassisted the goalkeeper — is crucial." University tonight at 7 p.m. at the Rice Track/Soccer Stadium. HBU is a first-year soccer program in CONFERENCE USA SOCCER STANDINGS NA1A Division I, but the team defeated its first two opponents by Conference Overall a combined score of 14-0. Rice will W L T w L T not be able to overlook that match Rice 0 0 0 3 0 1 to focus on UT. UTEP 0 0 0 4 1 0 The Longhorns come to Rice as one of the hottest teams in the East Carolina 0 0 0 3 1 0 country following wins over No. Colorado College 0 0 0 2 1 0 8 Penn State and No. 13 Illinois SMU 0 0 0 2 1 1 An estimated 1,193 undergrads attended last weekend's season opener against in Austin last week. They are led UH. The Owls' next home game is Sept. 23 against Texas at Reliant Stadium. by forward Kelsey Carpenter, Southern Miss. 0 0 0 2 1 1 who was named Soccer America's UCF 0 0 0 2 1 1 National Player of the Week last Houston 0 0 0 3 2 0 week after scoring two of UTs three FOOTBALL Tulsa 0 0 0 3 2 0 goals against those opponents. From page 11 The last time the Owls took on Marshall 0 0 0 2 2 0 their in-state foe was Sept. 18,2005 Memphis 0 0 0 2 2 0 On Rice's next possession, Smith concerned than when we were down in Austin, when they built an early UAB 0 0 0 0 3 0 showed his versatility, taking a 14," Graham said. 1-0 lead, only to allow two second- check-down pass from sophomore The third quarter was marked half goals and fall 2-1. quarterback Chase Clement and rac- by defensive play and offensive ing up the visitor's sideline 80 yards struggles for both teams, with for a Rice touchdown, energizing Rice's only points coming on a the crowd of blue and evening the 44-yard field goal by Juist that put score at 14. the team up 30-14 with 6:19 left in Juist boomed the following kickoff the third quarter. into the UH end zone, and Aldredge A pivotal play in the game's was stopped at his own 8-yardline by outcome came on an ensuing drive sophomore Vernon James. when Rice found itself pinned deep I'll managed only one first within its own territory. Smith took a down in its following series, as handoff and got hit as he approached the multiple fronts and blitzes of the line of scrimmage, forcing a Rice's new stack defense seemed fumble. to confuse the Cougar offense. "The defensive lineman got Sophomore linebacker Brian his hand around me right when 1 Raines stopped Kolb for a one-yard went through the line and the ball gain during the series on a pass just came out, so that's all on me," play UH was unable to develop. Smith said. Raines shined in his first start at UH recovered the ball at the Rice linebacker, making 17 tackles and 4-yard line, and three plays later, FRFF PI77A getting involved in almost every Lawrence kicked a 20-yard field goal, M WLmLmtwLjiJL major defensive play. Raines said bringing the score to 30-17 with 2:04 he credits his performance to the left in the quarter. Buy any Large Pizza at regular new 3-3-5 stack defense. The Rice offense played more "The defense is set for (the conservatively and ineffectively Menu Price and receive a 2nd linebackers] to run and make plays coming out of the half, muster- and execute how we're supposed to ing only three first downs in the Pizza of equal or lesser Value execute," Raines said. second half. While the defensive scheme After looking dominant for much allowed Rice to take advantage of of the game, the small Rice defense mismatches, it also contributed wore down as it spent much of the to some of UH's successes. Kolb second half on the field. UH scored completed 22 of 35 passes for 233 twice in the fourth quarter on short yards and three touchdowns. Gra- drives caused by Rice's suddenly ham said t he inconsistency was due anemic offense. The Cougars sliced to the players' unfamiliarity with the defense for consistent chunks of v ** ajWi the defense. yardage in the final quarter. Graham "What we do defensively is attributed UH's dominance to the extremely complicated and doesn't Rice coaching staff. leave a lot of margin for error," "We lost because we didn't make Graham said. the right adjustments and didn't Following the next Rice touch- do the right things as a coaching down, the point after attempt was staff," he said, "We put ourselves blocked by UH defensive lineman in position to win, but that's not Valid only at Kir by location. Coupon required. Delivery Marquay Ix>ve as he penetrated the good enough." charges my apply. interior line. It was a play that would Rice had a chance with 2:40 prove costly later in the game. left and the ball on the UH 38 Senior defensive lineman Dejuan but burned two timeouts in a Cooper sacked Kolb for a one-yard disorganized attempt to convert (713) 432-7272 loss to end the first half, with the a fourth-and-twelve attempt, and Expires 09/15/2006 score 27-14 in favor of Rice. Clement's pass was intercepted "Going into the half, I was more by UH's Ernest Miller. THE RICE THRESHER SPORTS FRIDAY. SEPTEMBER 8.2006 BY THE McNeese St. 20 22 22 NUMBERS Rice 30 30 30 Final Stats MSU Rice VOLLEYBALL sept. 2-6 Kills 31 55 From page 11 Errors 22 17 Attempts 127 120 a little shaky at times, but when all Attack Percentage .071 .317 "We just had a lack of discipline time. Kills by Bogan, Morgan, and the elements were there, she did a Assists 27 49 on defense and a lack of aggressive- Boulavsky helped the Owls in the Service Aces 6 4 good job balancing the offense." ness on offense," she said. "When middle of the game, but Kuykendall Digs 46 65 In Wednesday's match, Rice Blocks 8.0 4.0 we had the opportunity to put the took over the ending, posting three gave visiting McNeese State Uni- ball away we were a little tentative, of the Owls' last four kills as they Individual Stats versity all it could handle in the and we missed a lot of serves and clawed their way out of a 29-30 set- Kills first game and never looked back, MSU — Jones 8. Cook 8. Tyler 6 had a lot of unforced errors that point deficit to win 32-30. Rice — Morgan 19, Bogan 14, Kuykendall 13 The fourth game was the most sweeping the Cowgirls 30-20, 30- Assists gave UTSA points." lopsided of the match. Morgan 22, 30-22. FOOTBALL MSU — Cartie 21 Saturday evening the Owls Rice — Lopez 44 squared off with Illinois State posted five kills, but Illinois State Once again, Morgan was the Digs Owls' standout, finishing with team HOUSTON 31 RICE 30 MSU — Strama 16. Brooks 6. Baker 6. Cartie 5 University in what would be the jumped out to a five-point lead early Sept. 2. 2006 — Rice Stadium Rice — Morgan 19, Kirk 13. McClean 12 tournament championship, after and never relinquished it, taking highs in kills (19) and digs (19). UTSA fell to DePaul earlier in the the game by a decisive score of Key defense from Kirk and Mc- Houston 14 0 14 31 Attendance — 2/7 day. Rice came out lethargically, 30-15. Clean held McNeese State to .022 Rice 0 27 0 30 keeping the first game close but In the fifth game, Illinois State and .029 hitting percentage in the SOCCER first two games, respectively. UH — Harvey 6 pass from Kolb (Lawrence kick) never managing to retake their again looked to build a big lead with UH — Battle 7 run (Lawrence kick) early lead. Morgan — who finished the score 7-4, but Bogan served In the third game, the Cowgirls RU — Dillard 13 pass from Clement (Juist kick) BICE 0-0 (2-OT) PENN RU — Smith 80 pass from Clement (Juist kick) the match with a career high 27 for 5 straight points and Morgan took advantage of several unforced RU — Smith 7 run (Juist kick) Sept. 4, 2006 — Rhodes Field. Philadelphia, Penn. kills and digs—had six winners and Kuykendall piled on the kills errors to take a 16-15 lead, but the RU — Smith 1 run (kick blocked) in the first game, but the Owls fell to give Rice the 15-11 game and a Owls responded with some timely RU — Juist 44 field goal Rice (30-1): McClintock; B. Martin, Barber, Coralli - UH — Lawrence 20 field goal Schugart: Serrano. Petric, Lucas; Scott, Robbins, Os- 30-28. However, freshman outside match victory. blocks f om Kuykendall and Lopez, UH — Marshall 8 pass from Kolb (Lawrence kick) tendorf; Substitutes'. Crain. Conn. Fadool, Stanley. Wong. hitter Jessie Boulavsky led Rice in Lopez finished the match with stifling the would-be rally and UH — Alridge 8 pass from Kolb (Lawrence kick) Fraser, Ferguson, C. Martin. the second game with five kills, 57 assists, one shy of the career winning the game by a convincing Final Stats UH Rice Penn(0-l):Carrol; Capuano. Boys, Bienenfeld; Gregory, and the Owls tied the match at one high 58 she had against UTSA. eight point margin. First Downs 17 14 Stock, Larkin.Drugan: Weir, Fletcher, Hull; Substitutes: game apiece. "(Lopez) did a good job," Volpe Rice finished with an impressive Rushing Yards (net) 96 131 Rothenheber. Fintzi, Fuccello, White. Passing Yards (net) 233 152 The third game was much said. "We tended to go a little bit .317 hitting percentage and eight Total Yards 329 283 Assists: none. closer, with neither team taking too much to the outside because blocks, handing McNeese State its Return Yards 140 97 Cautions: Boys 118', Fuccello 119'. our first touches and passing were fourth loss in five matches. Punts - Avg. 6-40.8 640.8 Ejections: none. more than a four-point lead at any Time of Possession 30:35 29:25 RU Penn Individual Stats Shots 14 11 Rushing Shots on Goal 7 6 UH — Battle 14-74, Pope 2-31, Otis 2-8. Alridge 1-1, Saves 6 7 Laird l-(-7), Kolb 8-(-ll). Corner Kicks 6 4 SECOND Rice — Smith 18-108. Clement 10-27, Armstrong Fouls 14 19 From page 12 3+4). Offsides 2 3 Passing ARMY team that came within four points expected to carry the load this year team — Pablo Solares — to go UH — Kolb 22-35-0-233. RICE 2-1 RU — Clement 12-26-1-152. of Rice for second place at the and was the only Owl to place at along with three freshmen and four Sept. 1.2006 — Clinton Field, West Point, N.Y. Receiving conference meet. the NCAA South Central regional sophomores, only one of whom UH — Avery 6-66. Marshall 6-44, Harvey 5-50. Pope Rice (3-0): McClintock; Coralli. Schugart. Barber B. 2-42, Alridge 2-21. Ealy 1-10. Rice will compete without two of meet last season. Hampton, who placed in the top 30 at conference Martin; Serrano. Conn. Wong; Lucas. Robbins. C. Martin; RU — Dillard 4-34, Falco 3-17, Smith 2-87, Fentriss its top three scorers from last year: transferred from the University last season. Scott Zivick, one of the Substitutes: Crain. Scott, Petric, Fadool, Ostendorf, Ross. 1-5, Moss 1-5, Armstrong 1-4. Fraser, Jaggers. Ferguson. Marcel Hewamudalige (Baker'06), of Texas to Rice last year, said he three freshmen, finished sixth in Attendance — 23.352 one of only three Owls to win an will share his experience with the the Texas 5-A State Cross Country Army (2-1): Garcia; Miller, Schmitz, Costello; Byrnes, Longo, Betterbed. Emerson, O'Leary; Farrell. Roberts: individual conference title in cross younger runners but would not call Championships last year. Another VOLLEYBALL Substitutes: Biddick. Congemi, Janoski, Thomure, country, and David Axel (Brown himself a leader. freshman, John Buck, was a key Pedicino. Janick. White. Goss, Carr. '06), who came within seven seconds "We're a young team," he said. member of the Cinco Ranch team of a top-ten finish at C-USA in 2005. that won the Texas 5-A title last year. MCNEESE STATE 0 RICE 3 Assists: Rice: Barber, Schugart. "Being one of the older guys now Sept. 6. 2006 — Autry Court Cautions: B. Martin 89'. Hampton is one of the runners in only my second year [at Rice], But Warren said Simon Bucknell, a I know what it takes to get to a level transfer from Waitakere College in to be competitive. I wouldn't New Zealand, has been the most necessarily say that 1 need to be a impressive of the three freshmen leader, but I need to share what I during training. know with the other guys who don't "Probably the one [freshman 1 have that experience." who's going to have the biggest impact If the Owls are to fend off the this year is Simon Bucknell," Warren Thewel Wellness Centelr Need to lose competition at the top of C-USA, said. "John Buck and Scott Zivick will they will neeu strong contributions be big players in cross country, but from some inexperienced runners. Simon's the one who's looked the most 20 pounds? Rice has only one senior on the solid out of those three." Ready to start making FIRST From page 12

healthy lifestyle changes? "We also return five of our top ... If we can get development from eight (scorers), and if they improve, the new people and those live that I that will partially take care of the are returning, I think we can make a loss of Kate," Bevan said. "We've run at defending our title and getting also brought in four new freshmen. back to the national meet again." TH"£ OWL The Owl Weigh is a weight management program that will provide you with a variety of skills and information to help you achieve A nationwide search is on for the next Pussycat Doll! your weight management goals. Do you have what it takes? Under the guidance of Pussycat Dolls creator and founder Robin Antin, young hopefuls will live together and have their singing ability, dance For more information, check out our Web site: moves and sheer self-confidence put to the test, as they vie for the opportunity to become a member of the chart-topping singing sensation, The Pussycat Dolls. www.rice.edu/wellness/owl_weigh At its core, this show goes beyond just finding a new Pussycat Doll; it's about female empowerment, self-discovery and personal transformation. One lucky young woman will get her big break to join one of today's most popular musical groups, The Pussycat Dolls. FREE "Stress Management Workshop" In every woman there's a Pussycat Doll Raising If you are 18 years of age or older and think you have what it takes Resiliency Tuesday, September 26, 4:00 - 5:30 PM to make it in the high-stress, high stakes world of music, then go to at Rice www.cwtv.com to apply and for more information or in the Wellness Center. For more infor- email us at [email protected]. mation, e-mail wellness^rice or call x5194. HOUSTON OPEN CALL AUDITIONS Friday, September 15th, 12pm-6pm Please go to: htto://www.cwtv.com/pcd.html for exact audition location! THE RICE THRESHER CALENDAR FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 8,2006 15 CALENDAR WEDNESDAY 43 THURSDAY 44 FRIDAY 45 sept. 8 - Id Resource wealthy Mom and Pop Baker Blues The Rice Women's Resource Today is the first day of Baker College's fall public Center hosts an open house Families Weekend. This time party, Baker Blues, is tonight in FRIDAY TUESDAY from 7-9 p.m. in RMC's Kelley your parents are actually invited the Baker quad. In the event of % 42 Lounge. Anyone interested in to campus, which is much better rain, rather than just singing the Nine to five Will Rice will drink getting involved with the RWRC, than if they decide to show up blues, the party will be moved or anyone who just wants free unannounced at 8 a.m. inside and the show will go on. If only people actually got to Just as shocking to me as to chocolate and condoms, is on Saturday morning with a However, odds are good that work 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. and make you, but Will Rice College is encouraged to stop by and fulfill plate of cookies and an over- you won't be able to smoke a decent living these days. actually social enough to have a their desires. whelming desire to be enter- those high-dollar cigars if the Today the September Career pub night. It's tonight at Willy's tained. Your siblings are even party is in the commons. There Expo, Rice's largest career fair, Pub, of all places, so come help Return your books invited as well, hence the name is live music, and the party runs takes place at Autry Court from the residential college with the "Families Weekend". The entire the standard 10 p.m.-2 a.m. But 1-5 p.m, and all students and highest average GPA kill a few Today is Librarian's Day in weekend is full of events that do not plan on partying yourself alumni are invited. So stop by brain cells. Head down and Argentina. While I don't know your 'rents might love. To or your parents out, because a and get a job. enjoy beer and snacks on why Argentina chose Sept. 13 to learn more about Families superior party at a superior col- WRC's tab, and afterwards, honor the world's bibliophiles, Weekend activities and events, lege will occur a short 24 hours Decide already Will Rice will sweep (up the we should certainly honor our check out the Web site, later. Sorry, Baker ... I guess Today you can add a course mess everyone else made). friends at Fondren. Fondren. ruf rice, edu/-events/famweek. that's why you call it the Blues. without a fee. Tomorrow you can't add a course without a fee. This is also the last day students may withdraw and receive a full tuition refund.

Law school bound? The Legalese Law School fair takes place today in the Rice Memorial Center Grand Hall from 1-4 p.m. Admissions representatives from 12 law schools will be on hand to answer questions about the h application process or their (Friday, Sept l9 , 11am- 2pm respective schools. Or sue you. Cjrandffatf, Student Center SATURDAY

Leg warmers? Leg warmers. Get your groove thang on tonight at Sid Richardson College's annual '80s party. Duran I )uran and their contemporaries start jamming at 10 p.m., and shoulder pads and side ponytails will be jamming in the Sid commons § until 2 a.m. Hit the thrift store for (}o Jl6road to study, -worfj or 6otfi! * * * * some sweet new kicks, and then head over to Sid. Learn about, tfie over 500 programs worldwide offered to

9/11 remembered God's Word, and fellowship. Today marks the filth anniver- sary of the tragic events of Sept. 11, 2001. In commemora- We have both contemporary and traditional Sunday worship services, as well as a tion of the lives lost that day, college-level Sunday school class that is attended by many Rice University and Medical the Rice Chorale will lead a time of reflection and School students and taught by Dr. Jim Tour. Free breakfast is always served in the class, dedication at 12 p.m. in Stude Concert Hall. Admission along with an opportunity to take the Lord's Supper each Sunday morning. is free. We are located 2 miles directly west of campus, 6218 Auden between University and HOW TO SUBMIT Rice. Free round-trip shuttle service is provided each Sunday morning leaving at 8:15 CALENDAR ITEMS AM and 9:15 AM on the loop in front of Rice's Allen Center. See www.wubc.org tor Deadline is Monday at 12 p.m. more details, or call 713-668-2319. prior to Friday publication. Submission methods: Contemporary Worship: 8:30 AM Fax: (713) 348-5238 Sunday School: 9:45 AM E-mail: [email protected] Campus Mall: Traditional Worship: 11:00 AM Calendar Editor Thresher, MS-524

Submissions are printed on a space available basis. is THE RICE THRESHER BACKPAGE FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 8,2006

w w T ARE RICE WOMEN LIKE? PETER M. SANDMAN and tke staff of RICE UNIVERSITY SURPRISINGLY A PRINCETON IAN Houston, Texas SIMILAR TO HOW A very special social guide 713-528-4141 THEY WERE 40 to college women in the U.S.A. Where the It's hard to believe that any girl who goes to MIT could YEARS AGO ... be a good date. There aren't many girls who go to MIT in the first place, and any who'd like to are interested primarily in engineering and science. But the girls who want to go to MIT, who are interested in these fields, and who live in the Aire South go instead to Rice, And, believe it or not, the men AND 10 YEARS AGO... or the academic truth who know them swear that they make good dates. about curfewst hangouts This isn't as paradoxical as it seems, for Rice is smaller, and driving-time happier, and far more Southern than that Great Computer Rice women are like... Center in the North. Rice has a football team, the lively town of Houston, and-girls. Over 400 girls, who are for the ... Libertarians: At first they seem OK. but the most part intelligent, Texas-bred, and therefore unencum- more you get to know them, the more you real- ize just how crazy they are. bered by Eastern affectations. Little campus attention is paid to the football team, and the potential of Houston is ... A martini: In 10 years you'll think they're only rarely tapped, but the girls are as popular as oil wells. great, but right now they seem way over your The only problem is that men from UT, SMU, and ETC head. The Infaipoas, Indispensable "Little Black Book' have already discovered this, not to mention the 1,300 ... A Ford Pinto hatchback: They get the job Rice men themselves. As a result, a date with a Ricette done, but there are other ones that do it without requires long-range planning and a unique line. Try "Oh, the risk of blowing up in your face when you touch the rear end. ANDNOW... baby, I'll bet you know the molecular theory of inert gases ... You first physics test at Rice: Make you stay Rice women are like... inside out!" Then talk about anything else. up all night freaking out and longing for the ones Talk plays a big part in a Rice date. There are few big you had in high school. ... Organically raised chickens: Sure, their weekends, and the campus looks like an early experiment breasts aren't as big, but having one ... Thresher editors in chief: They take all you've in New Deal housing project, done in sandstone adobe. makes you feel good about yourself. got, suck out the life and creativity from it and Fortunately, if you can hold up your end of an intelligent leave the end product a lifeless, sanitized ver- ... Stars: Beautiful mysteries. conversation, a drive-in movie or hamburger joint will sion of the original. please your date as well as any place. And if you can't con- ... The Thresher: Best enjoyed by starfng at the ... War Owls: Give me a W! Give me a verse intelligently, what are you doing dating MIT girls backside. AROWLS! in the first place?

... Baker Institute events: You always hear about how awesome they are and see them ... Digital watches: Easier to use, but don't, ... Old bras: Smelly, unsupportive and you from afar, but your own experiences with them Rice men are like... look nearly as good. can't get them off your chest. are pretty dull. ... Grapes: Now they're sweet, but they ... A Hanszen new section heater: Tech- ... Rice mattresses: Cold and uncomfort- ... Communism: In theory, they're a good idea. In could use a few years' aging to bring out a nically, they can get you hot, but more able, but when that's all you've got. it's practice, all they cause is terrible hardship and sophisticated flavor. often than not, they break down trying. better than nothing. struggle. ... Servery food: Sometimes they are just ... Computers: They claim to be able to do ... Eggs: They only get laid once. ... Parking spaces: The good ones are taken by what you're looking for, but taken in large anything. But most of the time, they're just upperclassmen and the rest are too far out. doses, they will send you to an early grave. good for playing games with. ... Keystone Light: Cheap with no taste and will get you drunk by the end of the night. Editor's note: Some of these have been edited ... Old couches: Dirty, but great for sleep- ... Pennies: Really can't do much, but from the original Nov. 8.1996 Backpage versions ing on after parties. always seem to get picked up. ... Enron: Looks great on paper ... because they got those editors suspended. ... A trainwreck: Really terrible, but you ... Typewriters: They make lots of mis- ... Everclear: Socially acceptable only can't stop staring. takes and have no way of fixing them. among peers.

[email protected] CLASSIFIEDS (713) 348-3974 HELP WANTED I NEED A student to help my 7th grade A SOFTWARE PUBLISHING son do his homework and study for company in Rice village looking 1 **' BARTENDERS WANTED! $250 tests. Most Sunday afternoons and some for a dependable Rice student to per day potential. No experience evenings. $10.00 per hour.-Very close to process/package orders and manage necessary. Training provided. Age 18+ Rice- [email protected]. web operations. Some knowledge of OK. (800) 965-6520 ext. 289. html necessary; php a plus. Contact POWDER PUFF MATH AND ENGLISH tutor needed Michael at [email protected]. SINGLE MOM NEEDS a personal for a 14-year-old highschool student. assistant to file, organize, run errands, 5 days a week. Please call Elizabeth EARN EASY MONEY... 1. Rice very computer literate, make dvds (832) 282-2202. English Major wanted to oversee and scrapbooks, knowledge of latin manuscript corrections and act PUB NIGHT and accounting a plus. Afternoons. RENEWABLE ENERGY FIRM, as sounding board for ideas. Call (713) 621-9000. concentration on providing (713) 927-5267 2. Rice student typist affordable solar light to the developing (Microsoft). Call (713) 927-5267. TUTORS WANTED. LEARNING2, world, seeks volunteer and interns HUBS., a private tutorial service, needs for office, marketing and ad work. SEEKING STUDENT TO drive part-time tutors in Mathematics, Potential to move to compensated two children home from middle Biology, Chemistry, Physics, French, employment, 10-15 hours/week. school three afternoons a week, WEAR TOUR Spanish, English, Economics, and Office on Bissonet, near Rice U. supervise homework and afternoon Finance. Flexible hours. Excellent pay. E-mail to [email protected]. activities. Close to Rice campus. Call REP TOUR HOOD. No house calls. Office located close to (713) 562-2876. campus. (713) 528-7085.

TUTOR FOR $15-$30/hr. Required: CLASSIFIED ADS The Rice Thresher capable in all core high school subjects Attn: Classifieds Rates are as follows: (Math, Science, Fnglish, History, 6100 Main St., MS-524 Spanish or French); Min. GPA 3.0; Min. 1-35 words: $15 Houston. TX 77005 1892 nd also don't miss 72 hours college credit; Reliable vehicle; 36-70 words: $30 Phone: (713) 348-3974 Available weeknights. (713) 664-8085. 71-105 words: $45 Tuesday: Fax: (713) 348-5238 LUILL RICE PUB fllGHT PART TIME GIRL Friday to assist Oil Cash, check or credit card pay- The Thresher reserves the right and Gas Explorationist. I ite admin work, ment must accompany your ad. to refuse any advertising for any Wednesday: library research, errands, and general reason and does not take respon- Deadline is Monday at 5 p.m. FOOTBALL TRIVIA office work. Rice Village location. Flex- sibility for the factual content of ible hours. Must have dependable car. prior to Friday publication. any ad. Call for more details. (713) 529-7050.