Praise for THE DEVELOPING MIND “A tour de force of synthesis and integration. Siegel has woven a rich tapestry that provides a compelling account of how our interpersonal worlds and neural systems form two important pillars of the mind. The second edition brings the latest neuroscientific evidence to the fore; it is a ‘must read’ for any student or professional interested in mental health, child development, and the brain.” —RICHA R D J. DAVIDSON , PhD, William James and Vilas Professor of Psychology and Psychiatry; Founder and Chair, Center for Investigating Healthy Minds, University of Wisconsin–Madison “With the original publication of The Developing Mind, the field of interpersonal neurobiology was born. Siegel’s genius for synthesizing and humanizing neu- roscience, attachment, and developmental theory made the book a bestseller and attracted thousands to this new field. The second edition benefits from over a decade’s worth of additional findings, reflections, ideas, and insights. I encourage you to take Siegel up on his offer to share this fascinating journey, whether for the first time or for a return trip. You won’t be disappointed.” —LOUIS COZO L INO , PhD, Department of Psychology, Pepperdine University “When The Developing Mind was first published, Siegel’s proposal that mind, brain, and relationships represented ‘three aspects of one reality’ essential to human well-being still seemed closer to inspired speculation than teachable scientific knowledge. Just over a decade later, the neurobiology of interpersonal experience has grown into one of the hottest areas of psychological research. Over two thousand new references surveyed for the second edition testify to just how far neuroscientists, developmental psychologists, and clinicians have brought the field as they begin to more fully chart the interplay of mind, body, and relationships. This splendid second edition—at once accessibly written and meticulously documented—provides a comprehensive guide to this emerging science.”—SA R AH BL AFFE R HR DY , PhD, Professor Emerita of Anthropology, University of California, Davis “Siegel describes his book as ‘a journey into the developing mind,’ and no one is better equipped to invite psychotherapists and other students of human impulses to share this remarkable adventure. In clear and inspired prose, he reviews facts and theories about the human brain that can be difficult to grasp. He explains how the brain differentiates and enables the creative and passionate mind of a child to share meaningful intentions, experiences, imaginative beliefs, rela- tionships, community, culture, and language. He puts this understanding in the service of a humane and respectful psychotherapy that can give integrity to young lives that have become anxious, chaotic, and rigid.” —CO L WYN T R EVA rt HEN , PhD, FRSE, Professor Emeritus of Child Psychology and Psychobiology, University of Edinburgh, United Kingdom “Fulfilled my wildest expectations. Instead of laboriously struggling to learn about neurobiology, I found myself fairly effortlessly assimilating information because 1) the author is able to present his material in the context of interper- sonal relationships in general and the treatment dyad in particular, and 2) the author is a master of lucidity, avoids pedantry, and succeeds in making his data clinically useful.”—American Journal of Psychiatry “Readable, thoughtful, and informative.”—Educational Leadership “I knew that this book was one I should keep handy when I wanted to improve my understanding of information on which the future science of psychiatry will be based.”—Journal of Clinical Psychiatry “A remarkable book. The Developing Mind boldly transcends the reduction- ism that characterizes so much of contemporary psychiatry.”—Psychiatric Times “Current, thorough, closely argued. One of Siegel’s major gifts is for pre- senting anatomical, neurological, research, and clinical information while still pointing out what remains unknown. He explores infant–parent relationships, emotions, states of mind, and how knowing about them can help one improve one’s relationships and capabilities for developing successfully.”—Booklist “Why can’t we remember what we did at age three? Why are some children unusually shy? What is the biochemistry of humiliation, and how can it be ‘toxic to the developing child’s brain’? New and plausible answers to these questions emerge from Siegel’s synthesis of neurobiology, research psychology and cognitive science. His subject—how we become the people we are— deserves to hold many readers spellbound.”—Publishers Weekly “The story Siegel tells is indeed fascinating, essentially describing the transac- tional processes that happen at the interface between developmental neurobiol- ogy and the environment of an individual. He links every level of the system from cell chemistry to brain architecture, to caregiver–infant attachments, to interpersonal relationships in adulthood. This is a book to stimulate, illu- minate, and drive our understanding of human developmental processes for- wards and I suspect that The Developing Mind will be seen as a milestone work in the future.”—Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry “Brilliant. It should probably not be read at one sitting, but sifted slowly as you would a 20 year old port. This is not just a book for bright psychiatric residents or child fellows, but child psychiatrists young and old, overworked or underpaid. It offers a glimpse of new horizons in the profession.”—Canadian Child Psychiatry Review THE DEVELOPING MIND The Developing Mind How Relationships and the Brain Interact to Shape Who We Are SECOND EDITION Daniel J. Siegel THE GUILFORD PRESS New York London © 2012 Mind Your Brain, Inc. Published by The Guilford Press A Division of Guilford Publications, Inc. 72 Spring Street, New York, NY 10012 www.guilford.com All rights reserved No part of this book may be reproduced, translated, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, microfilming, recording, or otherwise, without written permission from the publisher. Printed in the United States of America This book is printed on acid-free paper. Last digit is print number: 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 The author has checked with sources believed to be reliable in his efforts to provide information that is complete and generally in accord with the standards of practice that are accepted at the time of publication. However, in view of the possibility of human error or changes in behavioral, mental health, or medical sciences, neither the author, nor the editor and publisher, nor any other party who has been involved in the preparation or publication of this work warrants that the information contained herein is in every respect accurate or complete, and they are not responsible for any errors or omissions or the results obtained from the use of such information. Readers are encouraged to confirm the information contained in this book with other sources. Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data Siegel, Daniel J., 1957– The developing mind : how relationships and the brain interact to shape who we are / Daniel J. Siegel. — 2nd ed. p. cm. Includes bibliographical references and index. ISBN 978-1-4625-0390-2 (hardcover: alk. paper) 1. Developmental psychology. 2. Interpersonal relations. 3. Intellect. 4. Brain—Physiological aspects. I. Title. BF713.S525 2012 155—dc23 2011052460 For Maddi About the Author Daniel J. Siegel, MD, is an internationally acclaimed author, award- winning educator, and renowned child psychiatrist. He is Clinical Professor of Psychiatry at the School of Medicine of the University of California, Los Angeles, where he serves as Co-Investigator at the Center for Culture, Brain, and Development, and Co-Director of the Mindful Awareness Research Center. He is also the Executive Director of the Mindsight Institute, an educational center devoted to promoting insight, compassion, and empathy in indi viduals, families, institutions, and communities. Dr. Siegel’s books include Mindsight, Pocket Guide to Interpersonal Neurobiology, The Mindful Ther- apist, The Mindful Brain, Parenting from the Inside Out, and The Whole-Brain Child. vii Preface to the Second Edition elcome to the fascinating world of interdisciplinary thinking. I invite W you to join me on this journey to explore the intricate intertwining of mind, brain, and relationships. Since the publication of the first edition of The Developing Mind over a dozen years ago, much has emerged from the objective study of science and the subjective knowledge of internal reflec- tion. This book honors these distinct but equally important realms of knowl- edge that will inform our travels. In this second edition, I have had the deep honor to incorporate what I’ve learned from scientists, psychotherapists, educators, philosophers, con- templative practitioners, and community leaders. The field that the first edition of this book introduced—“interpersonal neurobiology,” or simply “IPNB”—has grown in wonderful ways since then. It now has its own orga- nizations (see the Global Association for Interpersonal Neurobiology Studies, or GAINS), in-depth educational programs (see www.mindsightinstitute.com), and a professional library of over two dozen textbooks. My goal in thoroughly updating the references and revising the text for this edition is to make the ideas of IPNB and its scientific foundations as clear and concise as possible. I have had the good fortune of having 15 dedicated