DEATH: a LOGOLOGICAL PERSPECTIVE Some Causes Rocution, Al the Standpo Ing Someone Adopt the V Ing Oneself Saw No Wa~ DMITRI A
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An inspe< DEATH: A LOGOLOGICAL PERSPECTIVE Some causes rocution, al the standpo ing someonE adopt the v ing oneself saw no wa~ DMITRI A. BORGMANN decided to 1 Dayton. Wash ington The list of the form In my continuing search for answers to Life's Great Questions, tal punishm I have run across a major imbalance between Birth and Death. tion, thrott That imbalance is by no means obvious to the casual observer, old age); y however. Both BIRTH and DEATH are five-letter, one-syllable words a few are ending in the digraph TH. In addition, their first letters are only Once again I two spaces apart in the alphabet, and the printed lowercase forms mul tiplicity of those letters, band d, happen to be mirror images or reversals me to try ir of one another. One can, according ly, not reall y ask for greater congruence between BIRTH and DEATH, unless one seeks a single word conveying both meanings. A Accidental In logology, as elsewhere, things are not always what they seem B Bleeding 1 to be. If we probe beneath the placid exterior, we find that there C Cancer; C are only a few ways of being born, whereas there seem to be an D Decapitati almost limitless number of ways of dying. Consider: at the moment, E Electrocut there are only three ways of appearing in this world: in a normal F Firing sq\ birth, in a birth by Caesarian section, and in a premature birth. G Gallows; ( Science may gradually add two further ways: development of a H Hanging; fertilized ovum into an infant in artificially created and maintained 1 I ncinerati laboratory conditions, and the outright creation of human life in J Judicial m the laboratory. That is still only a paltry five ways, which don r t K Kamikaze begin to compare with the splendor of death - so far as I have L Leaping f: been able to determine, there are thousands of different ways of M Manslaugh leaving this world, for parts unknown. That plethora of pathways N Natural dl into the future is the subject of this article. o Old age; Faced by the sumptuous banquet that Death had prepared for P P istol-whi me, my first instinct was to arrange the various modes of demise Q Quelling; in alphabetical order, then extracting from the full list a modest R Race suici selection representative of the whole in measured alphabetical S Shooting; steps. In other words, I proposed to select three forms of dying T Terminal; beg inning with each of the 26 letters of the alphabet, balancing U Unbowelin my selection logologically. With so many descriptive designations V Vaporizati at my disposal, my hopes of succeeding were high, indeed. Little W Wasting a did I suspect the travail in store for me! X Xenophobi Y Years are After considerable struggle, I fashioned the list presented here. Z Zapping; One of my objectives in assembling it was to pick lethal designa tions that would be familiar to anyone reasonably facile in English, Wi th one reserving the more esoteric forms of death for special treatment forms to wr later in this article. I did not, however, manage to fill all 78 ception was of the available slots in my list; in the case of each of the let Again with ters J, Q, X, and Z, one slot remained open. I invite readers to succeed where 1 have failed - if they can. 5 An inspection of the list reveals its heterogeneous composition. VE Some causes or modes of death are stated impartially: cancer, elect rocution, and suffocation, for instance. Others are presented from the standpoint of the agent of death: flaying someone alive, knif ing someone to death, and torturing someone to death. Still others adopt the victim I s perspective: going to Davy Jones's locker, worry ing oneself to death, and yielding up the ghost, for example. I saw no way of imposing an artificial uniformity on the list, and decided to let nature take its course, so to speak. The list is equally heterogeneous in a different respect. Some of the forms of death included are legally inspired by man (capi t Questions, tal punishment, gallows); others are illegally inspired (assassina and Death. tion, throttling someone); still others are natural (natural death, d observer, old age); yet others represent illness (cancer, heart failure); and .lable words a few are accidental in character (accidental death, drowning). ~rs are only Once again, that is how life tends to end - as the resu It of a ~rcase forms multiplicity of forces acting on human beings. Far was it from or reversals me to try inverting or disguising life as we actually end it! for greater <s a single Causes and Modes of Death A Accidental death; Asphyxiation; Assassination .t they seem B Bleeding to death; Burial alive; Burning at the stake i that there C Cancer; Capital punishment; Choking to death m to be an D Decapitation; Dropping dead; Drown ing 1e moment, E Electrocution; Euthanasia; Execution in a normal F Firing squad; Flaying someone alive; Freezing to death :l.ture birth. G Gallows; Going to Davy Jones's locker; Guillotinement ment of a H Hanging; Heart failure; Homicide maintained I Incineration; Inhaling carbon monoxide; Irreversible brain damage nan life in J Judicial murder; Jumping from a tall building; ---- which don't K Kamikaze mission; Killing someone; Knifing someone to death as 1 have L Leaping from a tall building; LiqUidation; Lynching nt ways of M Manslaughter; Mercy killing; Mowing someone down )f pathways N Natural death; Necktie party; Necromancy o Old age; Organized murder; Overdose of sleeping pills ~epared for P Pistol-whipping; Poisoning; Putting someone to the sword 5 of demise Q Quelling; Quenching; ---- it a modest R Race suicide; Regicide; Rubbing someone out tlphabetical S Shooting; Stoning someone to death; Suffocation s of dying T Terminal illness; Throttling someone; Torturing someone to death balancing U Unboweling someone; Unfleshing someone; Unheading someone lesignations V Vaporization; Violent death; Voodoo death ieed. LittIe W Wasting away; Witchcraft; Worrying oneself to death X Xenophobia; X-radiation; ---- Y Years are soon cut off; Yellow fever; Yielding up the ghost ented here. Z Zapping; Zeroing in (of firepower); ---- :l.1 designa in English, With one exception, all of the forms of death were general ones: 1 treatment forms to which all humans are theoretica lly suspect. The one ex fill all 78 ception was REGICIDE, a death that only a king can experience. of the let Again with just one exception, all of the forms could be experi readers to 6 enced by one individual at a time. The exception, RACE SUICIDE, that termin is a death that only an entire body of individuals is capable of enterta inin~ experiencing collectively. These exceptions entered the list be The folIc cause of my fascination with death beginning with the letter R. sheer esotE Friendly as that letter has been to me in other contexts - it is, of articles for example, included in my first, my middle, and my last names 1979-1982 c it turned very hostile as soon as I began considering death. One appended other oddity of the list is the appearance of occasional synonyms prefers to in it. Thus, DROWN ING and GOING TO DAVY JONES I S LOCKER are the moment two names for one kind of death, as are ASPHYXIATION and SUFFO fore exclud CATION. Since the English language teems with synonyms, it would TION, MISe have been distinctly improper for me to try concealing that fact dealing cau in constructing my list. For two A few of the entries on the list may puzzle some readers. Some discussion. one very near an exploding thermonuclear weapon will be vapor for -CIDE ized instantly, making VAPORIZATION a legitimate form of death. pears in b A number of entries on the list - NECROMANCY, WITCHCRAFT, VOO Second, tha DOO DEATH - recognize the fact that some of us die of supernat word is SE ural causes. Precisely because that is the sad case, I felt it best SELF-PARRll to admit that fact openly in my list, so as not to bring supernat victim, the ural wrath down on me - it is better to be safe than sorry. Two the word i~ of the terms, QUELLING and QUENCHING, are accidentally a bit un er's own f usual: each refers to destruction, including the destruction of hu victim was man life. A few terms - MOWING SOMEONE DOWN, NECKTIE PARTY, then the IT RUBBING SOMEONE OUT - are on the informal side. Well, l' m really ment SELF an informal person, once you get to know me well, and I didn't the word P feel that the uninterrupted use of formal, stilted English was ap Company in propriate. You understand, of course, that I am advancing the the existenc real explanations for my various decisions here - the sheer una the numerou vailability of alternative entries had nothing at all to do with my choices. Nothing at all! SELF-PARI looked by t Of particular interest are the two causes of death beg-inning with RACE SUICll the letter X. XENOPHOBIA is fear of strangers and strange things. Second Edit Any fear, if it is intense enough, can do its victim in, and XENO RICIDE, ar, PHOBIA is no exception to the general rule. In a similar vein, however, th X rays, like any other form of radiation, can be lethal if they ing the die are strong enough, making X-RADIATION a possible cause of death.