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“Some people defi ne loneliness “Some said they’d no incentive as having plenty of people to do to get out of the house; one said something with, but nobody to do it was like solitary confi nement. I nothing with,” she says. became aware this was a big, big ‘I wondered “I know a lot of older people problem. More than half of people with busy lives who come home over 75 live on their own. There at the end of the day to an empty are a lot of us.” home with nobody to watch TV Using her experience from with or to make them a cup of tea.” setting up Childline, Esther It’s not in the middle of the night launched The Silver Line – a free if I’d made when Esther wakes up alone and 24-hour charity helpline for older switches on the radio that she feels people last November. most lonely, though. Since then, more than 100,000 “For me, it’s when I am callers have contacted them to chat somewhere really lovely I know to specially trained volunteers. ‘I wanted to give a fool of Desi would have adored to be. He Some are partnered up to receive something back’ was very fond of boats so if I’m weekly calls. Linda Southern (53), above, standing on a marina I feel lonely. Speaking to Yours at the became a Silver Line friend This year I am going on holiday by Consultus Care awards, Esther 18 months ago and looks myself to Canada, which is going welcomed the independent care forward to her weekly chats to be tough.” provider’s pledge to volunteer staff with widower Joseph Day (79), right, as myself...’ to enrol as Silver Line Friends. much as he does. ‘Some people “We need to link people back. A A school business manager and divorced … but by speaking out about her own phone line can break through the mum of two, she says: “ I heard Esther on TV defi ne loneliness loss of self-esteem. Somebody said, and wanted to help. I have a strong Christian loneliness, Esther Rantzen has helped ‘when I get off the phone I feel I’ve faith and I’d been thinking about giving as having plenty joined the human race’. It restores something back – we should all look after thousands of isolated, elderly people that crucial communication and each other and this is something I can do of people to do makes you feel valued,” she adds. from my own home that isn’t too onerous. across Britain with Silver Line Confessing to spending hours “I’m a real Essex girl and Joseph’s a something with, on her own phone, she says she true Yorkshireman but from the start there By Carole Richardson and Desmond called each other six were never any awkward silences. We talk but nobody to do times a day. about everything. He’s explained cricket fter pouring her “We encourage people to go on and snooker to me and I know all about his out to the nothing with’ the internet and Skype, but I still hero Ronnie O’Sullivan. He’s learned about nation about how think the phone’s more effective. my own hero Gary Barlow, though he was desperately lonely “I think you adapt your life a It’s heart to heart. We’re not a shocked when I told him I’d paid nearly £200 she felt, Esther little bit, but widowhood doesn’t generation more at ease with a to see him in concert earlier this year!” ARantzen seriously wondered if get easier.” screen than with people. I don’t “I call him every Thursday and we chat she’d done the right thing. Esther sums up loneliness as bother with Facebook.” for up to 45 minutes. The time goes by “A very close friend said to me: being all about loss – of a partner, Silver Line friends don’t need really quickly. I come off the phone feeling ‘How can you write that? Haven’t mobility, sight, hearing, a driving any special qualities, she insists. happy not just that I’ve done a bit of good you got too much pride?’ and I licence, friends or a job. They just need to be quite sensitive but because I’ve enjoyed our conversation. did think, have I made a fool of “Suddenly you lose your sense and enjoy talking to and enjoy Joseph’s become a real friend and I myself?” she admits. of self worth. You think the front listening to other people. defi nitely get back more than I give.” The former That’s Life! door becomes a brick wall that you “It’s not professional Joseph says: “I lost my wife three years presenter wasn’t new to hesitate to go through because you counselling; it’s a friendly phone ago and I do miss her. She wasn’t just my widowhood when she wrote think nobody wants to hear what call, but both people need to share wife; she was my life. Without her they are about how she felt in a national you have to say.” experiences. It’s confi dential but long, lonely days and it’s newspaper in 2011. Her beloved But as her friend’s comment not anonymous.” getting harder. I can’t get PIC: REXE XF FEATURES, PATRICK BOYD PHOTOGRAPHY husband Desmond Wilcox had died highlighted, there’s often a stigma Esther hopes that like Childline, out much because  The Silver Line more than a decade earlier, leaving attached to admitting it. The Silver Line will become a my eyesight’s so helpline runs 24 hours a her with three grown-up children. Happily, any embarrassment global service and has already had bad. Linda and I are day, every day of the year. She had a busy life professionally she felt about her public statement requests from other countries. poles apart but I Simply call 0800 470 8090. and plenty of friends. Although she was short lived. Soon she Now 74, what keeps her going? have a good laugh If you’d like to volunteer as a didn’t know it then, she’d soon have was inundated with poignant “It’s the knowledge you can with her once a Silver Line friend or make a a grandson, Benjamin. Yet despite letters from elderly people who improve things. Things can get week and it really donation visit the website, it all, she still felt lonely. understood how she felt. better for people,” she says. cheers me up.” www.thesilverline.org.uk

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