UNIVERSITY STUDENT PUBLICATION VOLUME XXXI, ISSUE 13 THURSDAY NOVEMBER 15, 1990 V WILFRIDtheLAURIER cord

NEWS: Guardian Angels FEATURE: What is is SCENE: Wining and SPORTS: The triumphant on vigilante security at really like to be illiterate? rhyming at the Cafe Bon return of 'My Sunday ÜBC. Choix. Evening'. page 3 page 14 page 17 page 31 THIS ISSUE ['grams' U ixi H ON ANY GM CAR, LIGHT TRUCK OR ■ 1 VAN ' If you're graduating from a recognized community college, cegep or university before August 31, 1991* you qualify for the 1991 GM Graduate Program. Join up and you'll receive a $750 discount on the new GM car, light truck or van of your choice. And for

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I Annual WLU staff craft sale Walter Kovacs The Cord COMPLEMENT your Christmas shopping with handmade crafts at the ninth annual Staff Association Craft Sale in the Concourse No- vember 27th. The material on sale ranges from Christmas decorations to Vic- torian painted baskets, handmade jewelry, decorated eggs, and hand- made chocolates. A table of baked goods is the highlight of the event. Formerly an inclusive opportunity for staff to sell their crafts to one another at Christmas time, the Staff Association now makes the event open to all members of the WLU community, including faculty and students. However, with limited table space available, organizer Sheila Watson said "the priority is for the staff. We have a full complement of people filling the tables for this year." Although the Staff Association typically puts on the sale at Christ- mas, displays were set up in the Spring and Fall. The reaction was mixed, Watson said. "A lot of people don'tknow why we do it." The first craft sale was conducted at the monthly meeting of the Staff Association behind closed doors in the Paul Martin Centre. "We had all of these people peeking in trying to find out what was going on," Watson said. "We got many requests from people who wanted to buy this gorgeous stuff." By the third year, the sale moved to the Concourse, becoming open to more internal people and outsiders. A scene from last year, and this year it should look pretty much the same. The Set up now as a commercial venture, vendors are charged nominal money raised in the craft sale will go toward a bursary on behalf of the staff -- the table fees depending on the size or footage of their display. Revenue sponsors of the craft sale. from the sales of merchandise goes directly to the craft-maker. After expenses are paid, the $500 remaining from table fee revenue is set up as a bursary allocated from Student Awards. Students are encouraged to lend their talents to future craft sales. "We would love to have more student input," Watson said, "but it's difficult with a high turnover of students each year." Vigilantes at UBC In the meantime, students can help contribute to the bursary and the future of the craft sale by soliciting from the vendors. But be VANCOUVER (CUP) -- The A five-person team patrols the she is pleased the Angels are on warned, the bake table usually sells out by noon. "It's a lot of fun, es- Guardian Angels are patrolling campus two nights a week, in an campus. "I feel reassured that pecially when Dean Nichols helps us," Watson says. "There's no the University of British Colum- effort to discourage crime and it, they are here on weekends," she doubt about he hustles them...um, that is, he gets people to buy bia's campus -- and reaction on sexual assault. up." said. "Students have reported that campus is mixed. "We came to ÜBC at the re- they have seen them and felt reas- quest of some students who ap- sured." proached us in the street last April," said Sean Williamson, head of the Guardian Angels' Vancouver chapter. We need to be con- WLU Model Parliament "When we contacted the ad- cerned with the en- ministration, the women's some changes in it from last year. Secondly, the organizers de- groups, and the RCMP we real- Vlad Kinastowski The Cord vironment we First of all, in the interests of co- cided to introduce a crisis man- ized that there was a problem." ON SATURDAY November the operation and enjoyment a new agement scenario into the pro- Linda Shout of the women's create for women 10th, the Wilfrid Laurier Political standing order forbidding votes of ceedings of the simulation. The centre said the presence of the Science Association hosted its non-confidence was introduced. party with the largest base of sup- Angels is proof the university has Second Annual Inter-University This had the effect of forcing the port while in government was not been able to deal with the is- Model Parliament in the Paul political parties in the House to forced to deal with a surprise sue of sexual assault on campus. University official Carol Gib- Martin Centre. In spite of essays work together in committee and report from the Gulf. The report Shout said she's not sure the son admits there is a security and school commitments, thirty in the Commons, rather than was from the Canadian High Angels are the best way to deal problem on campus, but she one students from WLU and UW splitting along party lines and Commission in Saudi Arabia. It with campus security. doesn't "know if this is the participated in the simulation of resorting to the effective means outlined reports of hostilities "I'm concerned that the use of preferred way" to deal with it. Canada's federal government. seen in the Commons and Senate CONTINUED ON PAGE 5 a patrol first of all takes power "We need to be concerned All in all, at the start of the day today. away from women, and en- with the environments that we the parties were well represented; courages them to rely on outside create for women, and empower- 16 Liberals, 10 Conservatives, 2 sources and other people for their ing women to feel themselves Reform Party, 2 NDP, and 1 safety," she said. that they have the ability to deal Libertarian sat in the House. "It also denies the reality of with this." The Model Parliament was violence against women in this "We haven't put out a wel- structured in such a way that al- society in that the majority of come mat, but we haven't dis- lowed the largest political party sexual assaults are committed by couraged (the Angels) from oper- present to form a government for someone the woman knows." ating either," she said. the first three and a half hours. She said the university should Student council executive After a lunch break, the second be doing more to help women be- Jason Brett isn't sure the Angels largest political party present was come "empowered." are the solution to campus allowed to form their government "What could be done is that security concerns. for the remaining three and a half the administration could com- "I've got problems with a hours. pletely fund WenLiDo (women's group who may or may not be During the allotted time the self-defence and awareness) students roaming around campus governments were allowed to try classes, for all women in dressed in military fatigues who to pass any or all of their bills, as residences — or all women across might dispense vigilante actions," well as any private member's campus," Shout said. Brett said. bills. Mock Speaker of the House R. Machak. Pic Tony Hartin Nancy Horseman, of the ÜBC "I don't know who these The Model Parliament also had office of women's studies, said people answer to." the cord 4 NEWS ThursdayNovember 15,199a New Co-op programme

Tim Sullivan The Cord LAURIER'S Senate, the body which governs academics, held a meeting last week. It was marked by heated debate on one issue, with timid discussion on others. The proposed dates for the next academic year were brought for- ward for scrutiny by the Registrar Peter Tron. Special dates to note are the beginning of term dates of September 9 (1991) and January 6 (1992), Reading Week from February 17-21 (1992). The Senate decided to change some calendar requirements involving Philosophy, Canadian Studies, History and Physical Education. In Philosophy, six credits will be permitted at the 100 level to count toward a degree. This is up from allowing only five. Canadian Studies added some credits available to the programme to count toward a degree. Physical Education saw the greatest change. Who's that in his underwear outside on a bed? Is it, could it be? No, Stuart Lewis, quarter courses be While fewer credit will required to count toward WLUSU's President, wears a tie. On the other hand, he is not in any official capac- a degree, the "Coaching Option" will be deleted from the calendar. was TIEd The Registrar warned the Senators that that will not affect those al- ity, and he to the bed to get him outside. Ya, sure, it must be Stuart ready in the programme. It only applies to those entering under the Lewis. HEY, EVERYONE, WLU-STUE is in his gitchies-outside on Hallowe'en. new calendar. Pic: Mark Strang Heated debate did occur on a proposed co-op-type programme. The programme would involve Computing students and would entail a longer work term than the regular co-op programme. Some ques- tioned the usefulness of such a programme as it might create a two tiered internship. The Dean of Arts and Science defended it as an op- tion, stating that computer employers demand more production from Ontario students rally employees because of the expense involved in training computer in- Kingston; to ternees. Canadian University Press of volunteer 35 hours of community Student Senator Damon John was concerned about the length of services; and to post a $300 bond. time on leave from school and the possibility of loosing touch with KINGSTON -- A man accused of leaving racist They also recommended to the director of friends. comments on another student's answering machine residences that Myers be transferred from The budget for this year was brought forward. One Senator was was found guilty by a Queen's University student residence. heard questioning why no discussion occurred on the reported sur- council judicial committee Oct. 31. Although Ghani said he was slightly dis- plus. While only the budget discussion was quiet, documents present- Neil Myers, a third-year Commerce student, appointed with the sanctions, he approved of the ed to the Senators but refused to non-Senators indicate an operating pleaded guilty to charges that he left intimidating message the judicial committee was trying to send budget surplus in 1989 to be $24,008. The accumulative surplus is messages on the answering machine of Atif Ghani out. reported at $15,909,236, with about $1.3 million appropriated to in September. "Ideally, we would have liked expulsion from some projects already. The incident took place after Ghani told Myers residence, but the committee did send a message The Senate meeting was noticeably more lively than the previous that he could not be a floor senior in a residence be- that racism is not tolerable," he said. one. Student Senator Christina Kraft said that her fellow student cause he had not attended a training session. Ghani said the outcome proved that the student Senators felt more comfortable at the meetings and knew more of The committee directed Myers to: write letters non-academic discipline system works. - what was happening. of apology to Ghani and the community; to pay a Myers did not wish to comment on the sanc- The next Senate meeting will be held in early December. fine of $100, which will go to the Islamic Society tions. if

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V ( I I Printed on 100% recycled paper V' the cord 15, 1990 NEWS 5 Model Parliament fun for the whole family on the Tory Senate Bill allowed it FROM PAGE CONTINUED 3 to pass. This bill was the first the breaking out in the region, and Tories have been able to pass in the execution of twenty two years, that was not a private unidentified Western hostages members bill. The Senate bill was which was broadcast on televi- interesting as the new Senate was sion. This was done in order to to be elected and effective, but in see if the participants could make no way was it equal. The surpris- tough decisions quickly and pru- ing thing was the support it dently with a minimum of in- received from the Reform party. formation. A Reform bill introduced as a Pri- Now a quick overview of the vate Member's bill dealing with day. The Liberals formed the the recall of elected officials was government during the first ses- defeated by Tories and Reformers sion. During this time, they alike after amendments changed passed two bills. One was a busi- its intent. Finally the Tory bill mocking the real GST ness plan which dealt with the The mocking Liberal government caucus in the midst of calling for the restriction of cir-

of VIA rail. The version - the Guaranteed Supplementary Transfe culation of New Kids on the rejuvenation with their own {; Har(in other was a Liberal GST. No, it ic:Mark Block paraphernalia was defeated was not a tax. This bill was a as well. The Speaker who broke Guaranteed Supplementary the monarchy were defeated. The in less than thirty minutes and be ran high when the government the tie indicated Free Speech is Transfer. Yes it was minimum in- Liberals were the lucky govern- able to defend it. defeated an opposition motion to important in Canadian demo- come bill for all Canadians. ment to deal with the Gulf report. The Gulf Crisis proved to be the ready the reserves in case of war, cracy. The Funny Money bill (a bill to Kudos must be extended to Mark most interesting part of the day. and to pursue the matter in the The day was not without its replace the Queen's visage on Hoogsteen, a UW student and The House was divided between United Nations. comic moments. Joe Childs currency) and the private mem- Prime Minister at this time, who the "Hawks" and the "Doves", The Liberal government argued started the day sitting as a mem- ber's bill which would entrench was forced to improvise a policy and emotions ran high. Tensions that there was no visible need to ber of the NDP. He then became initiate war, while the opposition an independent. Following that he argued that this was not a declara- founded the Federal Democratic tion of war but initiating a state of Union. This was a party of NDP readiness so as "not to get caught and former Liberal caucus mem- with our pants down". bers. From there he became an in- The Tory session in government dependent before ending his day Careers in law was marked with its own con- on the Tory side of the House. A conservative New Democrat, who don't meet the requirements to four times a year, in February, troversy. A Tory member of the Gaffney would have thought? Donna The Cord find a way to make admissions sit April, October, and December. House was removed for using Overall the day was a success, in up and take notice" Ranachan who wish more in- profane language. At least this INTERESTED a law career? Students since all the participants enjoyed may not said. Although this can be done in formation on law schools and ad- Parliament kept up with the rules Well the scales of justice themselves. They are all looking be tipping in your favour. Like a variety of ways, Ranachan said mission requirements should pick of etiquette. In addition, the Lib- forward to the Model Parliament teacher's college, admission re- that the personal statement is the up a copy of the Law Services In- eral Opposition Leader Kevin next term at the University of quirements to law school are very most effective means. Letters of formation Book in Career Ser- Schilling was removed in a Waterloo. competitive. reference are not required at Os- vices. caucus revolt after his abstention "Applications are going up by goode and Ranachan suggests 1 leaps and bounds every year" that students who do send letters says Andrew Ranachan, Admis- should ensure that they are of sions Officer for Osgoode Hall good quality. Osgoode received Law School. Currently, Osgoode 35,000 letters last year for 3,500 requires an A- average and a applicants. mark of 38 out of 48 on the Law There are 16 law schools across School Admissions Test (LSAT) the country and Ranachan strong- to meet admission requirements. ly suggests that one should apply A B+ average is required by other to as many as possible. If one ap- faculties. plies to the six schools in Ontario The LSAT helps schools make chances of admission are about sound admission decisions by 25 percent. If an applicant providing a standard measure of chooses to apply to only Os- ability that is common to all ap- goode, Queen's and the Univer- plicants. The lest measures skills sity of Toronto, chances of being that are essential for success in accepted fall between one and ten the law profession. These skills and one in fourteen. include the ability to manage and Three of the Ontario faculties organize information, the ability offer joint LL.B (law degree) and to read and comprehend complex MBA degrees. Many schools also texts and the ability to process offer joint degrees with other uni- this information to make conclu- versities. The University of sions. Windsor offers a joint degree Unlike teacher's college, admis- with the University of Detroit. l*^J sion to law school does not re- Completion of this degree allows quire a degree. Two years of uni- students to practice law in both versity is the prerequisite and the United States and Canada. every applicant must write the Maura Lendon who is a gradu- LSAT. The weight of the LSAT ate of Western's joint LL.B/MBA is score treated differently at dif- programme and is currently a - *l§flil :?|| \ A - SS>A.Jf-' -■■> $ ? . ferent schools. Osgoode puts taxation lawyer stresses that a s~ more emphasis on marks than on student of law has to be very self- ■If the test itself. disciplined as most courses con- Osgoode bases on third of its ad- tain 100% final exams. missions on mark, with 110 stu- LL.B programmes are typically dents being accepted through this three years. The following year is No. It's just a disc - not unlike those found at Dr. Disc; earth base for procedure. Another third are ad- spent articling before candidates thousands of new and used records, cassettes and CDs. mitted on non-mechanical enter the month Bar five Admis- It's time then to visit the Doctor, located at 146 King St. W. in the grounds. Examples are mature sion course. Students are called to heart of downtown Kitchener (see photo). We're open from 10am to 10pm Monday students who have been in the the Bar after passing the Bar Ad- thru Saturday and now from 2pm to 9pm on Sunday, (our phone # is 743-831 5) work force for five years and do mission test. not have a university degree. The The LSAT is being written at remaining third are based on spe- Laurier on December 1. Students UJ Kiss Week tj\ cial circumstances such as family who have not registered should _j $2.00 OFF CASSETTES AND LP'S illness, false start at school or v* iSSrali&^fm make inquiries at Career Ser- OFF CD'S AND POSTERS other personal experience that vices. Registration are $79 il^mflSll^ fees <$3.00$5.00 OFF GIANT POSTERS I^==^=^=^=^ resulted in a student failing to and a late fee of $49 is charged if J~ W achieve an A- average the form was not postmarked by 111 JUNES THAT ARE OUT-Of-THIS-WORID "My advise to students who November 2. LSATs are written the cord 6 NEWS Thursday November 15,1990 The Queen (huh) what is she good for? like receiving diplomats and Queen. If Parti quebecois leader crap, more like Canadian crap. presiding over state functions, Jacques Pariseau can like her, so Changing the representative func- AURORA BOREALIS By Tim like dinners, awards, and public can I. The thing is, Canada is tion of the Governor General Sullivan relations-type events. Canada, with its mixture of might be a start. Taking the This is largely what the American influence (like it or Queen off of the currency, anoth- LAST Monday, Japan installed role does the Queen or any other Governor-General does. It in fact not) - like the Charter of Rights er. But real change should be ad- its constitutional leader, the monarch in the Western World frees up the Prime Minister to do and Freedoms, among others, and dressed in terms of federalism, emperor. What came to mind, and play, other than having someone important things like govern. The British influences — Section 33 of which is, probably, a whole dif- not only with me, but hundreds of to put on currency? problem is the tie to the thrown in the Charter of Rights and Free- ferent question. Japanese as well, is to question Apart from that, the President is England. There, I submit, is doms, among others. the role of monarchs today. also the head of government. where the lack of legitimacy in a What we need to do is make These opinions are Tim's, and Other states have monarchies, I say "nothing". The queen is a the institutions, do not democratic society exists. some of British reflect those of The Cord, the Queen, like Kuwait, Jordan and Saudi hereditary ruler with some con- I have no problem with the like the Queen and all the Royalty Martin Walker or RM. Nixon. Arabia. Apart from being pretty stitutional power. Apart from much regressive and backward being a foreign ruler, Canada has countries, they are hardly demo- no business anymore supporting cratic. Kings and emirs preside such an institution. over paternalistic empires based So what are the alternatives? rally on nepotism, a throwback to an- The United States has its head of Ontario students cient days. state embodied in the President. J Brian Kelly The Brock Press University of Guelph. "I think it's eliminating a lot of people [from university education]. I know a lot ONTARIO university students have a new weapon of people who aren't going anymore because they in their fight against underfunding. could not get a grant and they don't have enough Kraft Dinner. money to go to university." Students from the University of Ottawa threw Students gathered at the Ryerson campus before macaroni from the visitors gallery in the House of marching down Yonge Street to Queen's Park. Commons on National Student Day, October 17. Tim Jackson, the chair of OFS said the rally Prime Minister enjoyed a close encounter with "will tell the NDP government that students know pasta when he spoke at York University in Toronto what they said about post-secondary education, recently. Ontario students say they'll do the same to know what the policies are, and expect them to act Premier Bob Rae if he does not take steps to im- on them." Jackson added he has been encouraged prove post-secondary education in Ontario. by the meetings he has held so far with the Ontario it, "Hey Bob, don't blow don't make us throw Minister of Colleges and Universities, Richard Al- might not Canada is headed by a monarch, Canadian tradition it" was a popular chant at last Thursday's Ontario len. but many democracies, wholly accept that kind of repub- (OFS) sponsored like Cana- Federation of Students rally in Brad Ward, parliamentary assistant to Allen, da, hold the position to licanism. The alternative might Toronto. event was to be purely The held remind the New told students at Queen's Park that the NDP govern- that of a figurehead. no be to establish something like the government stated It is less Democratic of its policies ment is "...carrying the ball [and] we're going to go the case that it is a to parliamentary republicanism like towards throwback post-secondary education. The party's all the way for a touchdown...Over the next four antiquity. that found in There, a pres- policy implementation Canada is also consid- Israel. manual calls for the of an all years we'll give you a gift - to provide the best ed- ered a parliamentary, executive, ident heads the state in largely a grant student aid program and zero tuition. ucation possible in the province of Ontario." federal ceremonial function. "I'm paying for and constitutional demo- The head of too much money my educa- Wilfrid Laurier University is not a member of cracy. So the question is, what state is responsible for ceremony, tion," said Brian Cox, a student protester from the OFS. -You've Found the Place—

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301 King St. E. Kitchener 578-6930 „„„„ the cord Thursday November 15, 1990 NEWS 7

THIS WEEK: TERRY COPP Frankly Speaking CHAIR OF THE HISTORY DEPT. AUTHOR OF A NEW BOOK anFrank by Morningstar interview AND FrasenWhat do you think Cana- Gulf there will be a phase where difficulties that vets had re- Morningstar was unable to do Terry Copp: I'm chairman of the Frank be a entering society were common with the author History Department. dian troops are going through in it will nasty, brutal battle in the interview of enough that they decided it was a Battle Exhaustion, WLU professor Fraser: How are the book sales the Gulf today? which infantry and armored divi- syndrome or disorder. I don't crit- Terry Copp because he was just too going?(cutting to the chase) Terry:The Canadian troops are sions will take significant icize this but once it became bloody tired. Energetic young keener Terry: I have no idea. It's an aca- mostly an internal security force casualties and significant battle known that they [the vets] could Fraser Kirby jumped at the chance. demic book. A very seriously re- in Saudi Arabia. It's hard to im- exhaustion casualties. I think the receive treatment and indeed pen- Professor Copp's book documents searched book. The maple leaf agine a scenario where actual military understands that. battle exhaustion also a natural the effects of (Copp's series of books on conflict will take place. I'm sure the military is telling sion then there was as battle shock. His book es- series known social history) was for a If we do send ground infantry their political masters that they tendency for people to vocalize pecially centres on Canadian troops Canadian popular audience and did quite troop, we can say two things very will do their duty,and are capable these problems. in the Second World War. quickly. The Canadian military is of doing their duty but this will Fraser:So there are no long term Fraser: Hi Terry, what exactly do well. I'm pleased with this new a very professional fighting force not be a costless operation. This effects of battle exhaustion? you do at WLU? book. and is recognized as professional is not Granada. This is a very dif- Terry:There is no apparent cor- internationally. In terms of ficult kind of military operation. I relation between battle exhaus- psychiatric service they are as know for instance that die British tion and long term distress. of well organized as any army can have sent an advance front line FrasenOut of the context of war, anniversary psychologist team is battle exhaustion an important First and the Amer- be. FrasenWhat about the Auditor icans are professionals at this. lesson in how humans handle Generals comments on the poor They have divisional psychiatrist stress? I think I'm suffering from quality of the military medical and foriegn psychiatry divisions student exhaustion. deaths in El Salvador corps? for some time. Terry:Sure. I gave a talk at Terry:l don't know of any evi- Fraser:ls the Viet Nam legacy, Montreal General Hospital. They 1990, former Defense Minister dence to support that claim. Ar- Post Traumatic Stress Dis- believed it was an analog of Eglin Comment by Peter Gen. Rafael Humberto mies today accept battle exhaus- order(PTSD) a symptom of battle "acute stress disorder". This hap- pens during natural disasters. If you have a very good night Larios...denied that a meeting of tion as a fact of war just like exhaustion and was it present at the Turret tonight, get in late, 24 military officers and President decide perhaps to watch a late Cristiani on Nov. 15, 1989 had movie, you will be getting to bed anything to do with the murders at just about the time they were of the priests, who were killed pulling Segundo and Ignacio and shortly after the meeting ad- Juan and Elba and Ignacio and journed at 2am" (El Salvador Celine and Armando and Joaquin Today (El Salvador Information out of bed, laying them face Office), October 1990, p. 2). "A down on the ground and shooting source close to the investigation them in the back of the head.(i) charged that the [United States] That was exactly one year State Department is withholding ago, in residence, at the Univer- twenty-one secret documents re- sity of Central America in San lated to the case 'for reasons of Salvador. national security'..." (El Salvador Elba and Celine were killed Information Office [Newsletter], because they witnessed the killing September 1,1990, pp.4-5). "Five of those they served - served and of the Salvadoran soldiers impli- saw. The men were killed be- cated in this murder [sic] were wounds. after World War II? There is something to be learned cause they served the truth - trained at the U.S. Army School Fraser:With the incredible tech- Terry:No it was not. PTSD was from the military. Veritas omnia vincit. The women of the Americas [in Fort Ben- nology in war, today is battle ex- entirely created by opponents of Fraser:Thank you very much, were a housekeeper (2) and her ning], according to a report made haustion still a problem? the war in Viet Nam. It was a good luck with the book. daughter. The men were univer- public by Rep. Joseph Moakley Terry:! think if war comes to the political/medical decision. The Terry: You're welcome. sity faculty; they were also Jesuit of Massachusetts ... [who] heads priests. One of them was the Rec- the Congressional Task Force tor of the university; one of them monitoring the investigation of was a sociologist. (3) the Jesuit murders ... It was also

On January 19th, 1990 nine made known ... that 'the entire members of the armed forces, in- unit that allegedly carried out the cluding a colonel, were charged crimes was participating in a U.S. with the murders (Globe and training exercise during the two Mail, Jan. 20,1990). In June 1990 days immediately prior to the President Cristani "admitted murders'" (El Salvador Informa- Save 10% off publicly that he had ordered a tion Office [Newsletter], Septem- GRAND November 10 I search of the Jesuits' residence ber 30, 1990, p. 2). On September Store Wide three days before they were 3, 1990 nine persons, including AnrK|||Ur 382 Kin9st-N- killed" (El Salvador Information decorated Vietnam soldiers, be- -(on regularly priced stock) I ll# M lIUII Waterloo Office [Newsletter], September 1, gan a water-only fast at the main 1990, p.4). "On September 4, CONTINUED ON PAGE 9 OPEN HOUSE UNIVERSITY OF TORONTO DEPT. OF MEDICAL BIOPHYSICS For prospective graduate and summer students pnry r * r POLYCARBONATE 7 interested in Cancer Research programs in Cell BANFF DESIGNS SIERRA DESIGNS DELUXE CHRYSALIS '89 MODEL ENVIRO. MARKET SHADES WITH Biology and Medical Physics. POLAR PLUS JACKET 1/2 ZIP Q.D. PANTS BAGS 2 STYLES CASE AND EYE TIE

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thecord \ 8 NEWS ThursdayNovember 8, JSSft s BIOFILE: to eat or not to eat? IN OUR society, the con- teed weight loss regimens. Al- Initially a basic understanding of sequences of food consumption though the eating habits are in- our metabolic system is necessary become ridiculously obsessive fluenced by complex combina- to see where the brain and our By factors to some people, particu- tions of psychological factors, hormones maintain their roles in larly women. physiological factors contribute eating. A.E. This reality is readily exploited heavily to the question, "why do I All food that passes through the Rogan by more heinous individuals sell- consume too much or too little?" digestive system is absorbed in ing "crack devices" and guaran- It's a quagmire answer. one of three ways. Carbohydrates

- BIOFILE starches, sugars, and milk sugar adiposity throughout their So it appears that our body's - are broken down into glucose level lives. Although the brain's repre- overall fat concentration is and absorbed in the first twenty in- sentation of the body's fat store is delibly stamped in and percent of the small intestine. around not fully understood, appears puberty. Any significant Proteins - meat and cheese and it loss or that a circulating substance is gain of weight would probably types of things - are broken be responsible for relaying the mes- down into amino acids and are accompanied by an increased or sage. Many scientists believe that again absorbed the first twenty decreased appetite level that is al- in the substance is insulin. This, percent of small intestine. ways present. This may in some the they maintain is probable since Fats are emulsified (broken way explain the recivitism rate insulin is found circulating in the down) by bile salts from the liver experienced by obese people on cerebrospinal fluid (sort of a con- diets, not, and are absorbed in the intestines but fear there is some centrated glucose milkshake that as fatty acids and light at the end of the tunnel. You feeds the brain cells) and yet is monoglycerides. Whatever the can alter your metabolic rate source of energy is, calories in- gested that are not immediately used will be converted to fat of glycogen for future tissue needs. Glucose is the major source of energy for the cells of the body. The liver plays a vital role in con- verting stored fat and muscle into glucose. Insulin is required by all body cells, except neurons, in order to use available glucose. Given these facts, we can move on to some questions like, "what starts a meal?" and "what regu- lates body weight?" We used to believe that adiposity (amount of stored fat) was a secondary effect of other primary regulators of eating be- not required for glucose con- through increased activity and havior - a result of how much sumption. Insulin binding sites thus burn more calories per ac- was eaten and metabolic rate. have been found in the brain, par- tivity. Evidence now suggests that the ticularly in the hypothalmus. A.E. Rogan is a student at Laurier, overall fat store in animals is When the hypothalmus is and the resident bio-type person. She somehow represented in the brain stimualted directly with insulin, it asks that some topics be suggested and that the brain directs the appears to signal the brain to stop for some of her neurotransmitters are eating behaviours to defend the feeding activity. slowing her ideas process down. in fat cache. If an animal is force fed Neurotransmitters also appear to Things you might want to see and gains a lot of weight, it will, play a role in eating behavior. Biofile can be suggested to Cord-type people like Associate News Editor when to feed freely, un- Norepinephrine, which is allowed released Tim Sullivan, via a love letter, note, dereat until the weight is lost. The by the presence of drugs such as gift, or just plain sugggestion. The opposite is true of animals that amphetamines causes animals to opinions, if there are any in this have been starved. stop eating. Several neural tracts column, belong to A.E., and not Adult animals appear to containing norepinephrine end in necessarily anyone else up at The maintain a relatively constant the hypothalmus. Cord. ON THE GREEN B THE ENVIRONMENT WITH SARAH WELSTEAD A FEW weeks ago I downplayed the environmen- that are used to disinfect the water. I don't know tal impact of plastic tampon applicators as an en- why anyone would be Hushing used condoms down vironmental hazard, suggesting that plastic, the toilet instead of wrapping them up and putting cardboard, or no applicator at all, it was all the them in the garbage (and I have heard of people same. After all, how could something so small pos- who wash their condoms, sprinkle them with a little sibly have any real effect on the environment? baby powder, and save them for next time), but ten Well it seems I have fallen victim to a pervading gallons worth suggests to me that there are an awful mentality which assumes that if "it is just a little" lot of people in Windsor practicing safer sex. and if "it is so small", how can the average person Both of these little items sound kind of funny, make a difference by simply making a small change something to laugh about over a beer while reading in their lifestyle? The Cord on a Thursday night, but it is all these It turns out that plastic tampon applicators are a seemingly insignificant things that perpetuate the significant water and beach pollution problem. In problem, not to mention making waterways even the United States, they are nicknamed "beach more repulsive than they need to be. whistles" and are turning up on ocean beaches on A more serious problem that is happening in both coasts. Apparently they find their way into Toronto now is the washing up of used syringes on oceans via municipal sewage systems, which are the beaches. Not only is the environment at risk prone to overflowing during heavy rain storms. from untreated, improperly disposed-of garbage, In New Jersey and New York State, it was but consider the health risks from these per- estimated that in the late 1970'5, one thousand sonal/sexual products. We need to stop flushing in- "beach whistles" were being dumped every day. discriminately and dispose of these products in a With more and more brands of tampons using more responsible way. plastic applicators, it's likely that more are being today. dumped The opinions in this column are those of the author, but In a related type of problem, in January, hundreds sometimes she retracts them, so in essence, they may in are, but of used condoms were clogging the new sewage not even be hers. We will see in time if they fact Cord, treatment plant in Windsor. Every month, approxi- in any event, these opinions are not those of The writing mately ten gallons worth of condoms were wrap- Student Publications, or even the guy who gets off ping themselves around the high-tech light tubes these disclaimers. the cord 9 Thursday November 15,1990 NEWS Homo superior: evolutionary speedsters haven't even invented a tri- enemy and you got killed by it at hell. Psychologically, it destroyed You dimensional entertainment unit, the same time. them all. It wasn't long before alone a portable one. It'll be a They also became two out of three homo superior let long time that will happen vegetarians. No one could went insane because their cir- before to you. slaughter an animal for cumstances forced them to go food Gee, I'll sleep well tonight. without slaughtering themsleves against their inherrent nature and as well. It also meant they all had be nice to everyone else. They The rubish contained in From the the to be extremely nice to everybody could never lash out or throw Asylum is strictly according to secret Cord News Editor ONCE UPON a time there was way: they were warm blooded, else, or else they'd all be temper tantrums, and had to hold agenda of Mark Hand, and has nothing what- another race of intelligent life on carbon based, had opposable as hell. all their emotions inside. miserable soever to do with the rest the Cord earth. They were the homo supe- thumbs, were bipedal, and were Gee, Marlowe, sounds Eventually the whole race of that or, as it has turned out, a large por- rior. They're dead now. very violent and emotional, just killed themselves to avoid the really awful. What's the prob- tion our readership. Okay, it was I Well, it humans today. agony not hurting others. of How do know? like lem? Why'd they die? A lot of of just one guy who complained, but we a That's lovely. So how come a lovely story. That's sounds kind of corny, but little people would call that a Utopia. What couldn't understand the point of his voice told me. My mystery they're dead? Exactly. Like all potentially one for the children's books. letter so I guess the point is pretty friend. They were just like you in all Utopian situations, it was sheer You needn't worry, though. moot. I've been talking to this voice ways except one: they evolved for about three months now. It very very quickly. comes from out of all kinds of How quickly? weird places: sewers, closets, un- Fast. You know how it took Crimes against humanity der the bed, an so on. I've never centuries for humans to go from to slouchy-shouldered beasties to seen any sort of body attatched CONTINUED FROM PAGE 7 It's time the Butcher of Washington (and his I catch a erect it, but once and a while your present form? Ottawa sidekick?) were tried for their crimes glimpse of two red glowy lights, Yeah, so? gates of Fort Benning to get the U.S. training of against humanity. sort of like spectral eyes. It can be Took them a week and a half. Salvadoran soldiers stopped. A memorial service for the UCA Eight Is being held In kind of spooky. Wow. According to Amnesty International army- they St. Mary's Church (56 Duke St. W., Kitchener) at One thing's for sure, whatever Another few days and supported death squads killed more people ~ forty- more 7:30 p.m. tomorrow (Friday). it is, it sure ain't human. had mastered fire. One five — in El Salvador in the first seven months of The voice is very deep and week and they had Nintendos. 1990 than in all of 1989: '"Bodies of victims have 1. In an article in The Cord of March 15, 1990 I wrote that the gravelly, and varies from very Like Marlowe say, fast. found mutilated, with their faces com- killing "was done, I have no doubt, with American-supplied been some confirmed in soft to annoyingly loud. It's hard Now that's advancement. others with signs of having guns and bullets" (17). This was subsequently pletely destroyed and Sojumers 19, 3 (April 1990),p. 25. to tell if it's male or female, so I Shut up and listen to Mar- been brutally tortured'" (K-W Record, October 24, just call it an "it". A few weeks lowe. Things were fine and 1990). 2. "Between the day we met at Agulares and the day he died, I name: they at ago I gave my friend a dandyish until one afternoon "Die United States has given $4-5 billion in mili- spoke with Archbishop Romero time and again, the chancery, Marlowe. I think it likes that, be- all realized that they had evolved in the little hospital, or in the house where we Jesuits live. He tary and economic aid to El Salvador in the last at cause it started to refer to itself as a super-enheightened sense of paid us fairly frequent visits. We could see that he was ease in decade. Canada gives aid to non-governmental our house. I remember, before taking his leave, he always a short while later. empathy with other creatures. Marlowe projects in El Salvador through the Canadian stopped into the kitchen to thank our cook, which gave her a to me at odd Now, whatever they did to others Marlowe talks Hunger Foundation. In his Quiet Complicity: Cana- great deal of pleasure" (J. Sobrino, Archbishop Romero: times, and tells me things. It asks they themselves felt. dian Involvement in the Vietnam War (Between the Memories and Reflections (Orbis, 1990), p. 31.) Romero was as- questions, mine. su- sassinated in 1980. The flow of U.S. aid was interrupted for two me and answers So when Edward the homo Lines, 1986) Victor Levant wrote, "The very exis- told me perior spanked his child weeks. It was Marlowe who for tence of a Canadian Aid program for South Viet- superior. Guide under the 3. In March 1990, in an act of remarkable bravery, Fr. Michael about the homo hiding the Tri-D nam helped to legitimize expanding economic and I was brushing my teeth one family's portable tri-dimensional Czemy, to that point Director of the Jesuit Centre for Social military appropriations in the U.S. congress Faith and Justice in Toronto, went out to El Salvador and took night I heard its familiar entertainment unit, not only did when directed towards prosecution of the war" (82). over the very office and position of Segundo Montes. voice come out of the medicine the child feel it, but so did poor cabinet. Eddie. Marlowe's going to tell you a Lends truth to the old "it hurts bedtime story, it said. me more than it will you" line, Oh no, not now, Marlowe, I huh? answered. I'm kind of tired. Ha, ha, very punny. Just shut I SAID MARLOWE WILL up. It worked the same way for TELL YOU A STORY AND YOU emotional pain. When you yelled WILL LISTEN! at someone and your being mean Um, okay. Now that you put it to them hurt them, you would feel

like that. their hurt too. -attpjSk. «j .'. .v,'-v.. :j- I M Marlowe's telling you a true Needless to say, the implica- story, about homo superior, the tions of this newly evolved power people who came before you. were pretty devastating. Wars be- They're all dead now. They were came a thing of the past. It didn't a lot like humans today in every help much when you shot your

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For applications write to: T.E.A.S. P.0.80x 1328 650 Woodlawn Rd, West GUELPH, Ontario NIH 7P4 the cord 10 COMMENT ThursdayNovember 15,1990

cover photos by Jo-Ann Jalien and Tom Szeibel the cord NOVEMBER 15,1990 VOLUME XXXI, ISSUE 13 EDITORIAL BOARD

EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Tony Burke NEWS EDITOR Mark Hand ASSOCIATE NEWS EDITOR Tim Sullivan FEATURES EDITOR GailCockburn SCENE EDITOR GuyEtherington

SPORTS EDITOR „ Brock Greenhalgh BUSINESS EDITOR vacant PRODUCTION MANAGER Christine Yarwood

Production Assistants: Roxanne Chartrand, Darcelle Hall Chronic underfunding kills us - Karen Lennox Classified Co-ordinator Charlotte Gravtev Ontario's university students have finally taken a cue from their more Circulation and Filing Cathy-Jo Noble active Quebecois counterparts and have shown that they too will not tuition and Graphics Artist...... J.R. Artinger tolerate hikes chronic underfunding of universities. At last Thursday's rally, the OFS (of a member) a Copy Edit0r5...... ,,.,,,,.....,,, ...... Mike v. Bodegom which Laurier isn't sent clear message to the new Ontario government. The message was simple: university vacant students have had enough; enough of trying to scrimp and save unreasonable amounts of money in order to barely make it through the school year. CONTRIBUTORS: Now, we're not saying we have a problem with keeping close track of the small amount of dollars it should take for schooling, and we're not looking for a free ride; it's our education so, if the school must have money, we should have to A. E. Rogan, Sarah Welstead, Peter Eglin, Donna pay for some of it. What we are saying is that it's just getting too damn expensive to go to school, let alone buying a car to Gaffncy, Fraser J. Kirby, Stephan Latour, Rob Hums, get there; soon you'll have to be a millionaire just to even think about going to university. What's that dad? You only make Rob Cresswell, Ed Rusk, Craig Burch, Chris Dodd, a hundred thousand dollars a year? Guess I'll be hanging out around home after highschool. Do you think you could ask Andrew Bailey, Martin Walker, Jonathan Stover, Jamie for a raise? I can't make it on the $6.50 an hour I make at McDonalds. Neilson, Ed Rusk, Stewart Reynolds, Vlad Kinastowski, Tuition has grown steadily as have other fees and school-related expenses (and that's not even taking the GST into con- Bill Legate, Steve Burke, Chris Skalkos, Brian Kelley, sideration). It's getting increasingly more difficult to buy an education. Joe Wiebe, D.O.S. Weeden, and no-one. In the context of today's recession and to expect Production: Kevin Tessner and youth unemployment, it is unrealistic students to be able to squirrel Fraser J. Kirby. tuition, Photo: Chico Galvez, Eda Deliso, Chris Skalkos, Tony away unreasonably large amounts of cash to pay for not to mention eight months of fees, food, rent, books, trans- Harton, James Neilson, Mark Strang, and Harvey Luong. portation, and other living expenses. It is also unrealistic to expect parents to pick up the slack. Many parents either refuse or do not have the money to contribute towards their children's education. STUDENT PUBLICATIONS OSAP in its current form certainly isn't the answer. The student loan system is notoriously bad at assessing student financial needs. This year it has taken an exceedingly long time for students to find out if they even received OSAP; apply SYSTEMS TECHNICIAN..,- Michael Myc in May and find out at the end of October or later. Meanwhile, two month's rent is overdue and the fat on our bodies that PHOTO MANAGER Tom Szeibel we have been storing up has melted away. The result is a crisis of student poverty, with many doing without adequate food Photo Technicians:...... Chico Galvez or shelter. Jo-Ann Julien Although some students find enough time to work and enjoy working, it should not be expected that these part-time and Graphic Arts Technician Niki Westman often ill-paying jobs (which supposedly shouldn't interfere with studies) will fund a school year. Lost in the shuffle are ADVERTISING: those who don't have parents with money, who can't find well-paying summer or and are MANAGER Martin PJL. Walker part-time jobs who underfunded Production Managerßick Dales by OSAP. Lost also is the ideal of education being a right, not a luxury. In keeping tuition and student expenses high, our society Assistant...— St?. > Ladouceur Advertising Representatives; is blocking a large section of the population from acquiring an education. People often claim that intellectuals are elitist;

»•«*«»»»»»•*•»»Laura K. Lee, Katu Campbell, perhaps if the system were more open and accessible we wouldn't just be representatives from the middle and upper Dennis Bon, Marc Navabi, James Neilson classes. We should perhaps look with envy towards many of the European countries where education is either free or is very in- expensive. We should ask why Canada is moving in the opposite direction. Don't our elders tell us that we are their invest- BOARD OF DIRECTORS ment in the future? We can only hope that the new provincial government is listening and is willing to live up to its promise Jana Watson, President of a strong commitment to education. Jim Boyce Pat Brethour We are not asking for an unreasonable freebie. We are asking for a reasonable helping hand. Vlad Kinastowski Dan Muys Peter Roose Tom Samac Stuart Lewis Editorial opinions are approved by the Editorial Board of the Cord and are independent of the university, the Student Union, and the Student Publications Board of Directors. INQUIRIES: 884-2990 (Editorial) 884-5092 (Advertis- ing). National advertising by Campus Plus: (416) 481- 7283 The University Blues by Kevin Matchstick

The Cord welcomes all feedback, comments, criticisms, gifts, and suggestions from our readers. Please submit letters to the Editor typed and double-spaced by Tuesday at noon for the following publication. We can only print letters that bear the author's real name, telephone number, and I.D, number (if applicable), but your name may be withheld by request. The Cord also welcomes all submissions but remember that they become the property of The Cord and we reserve the right to edit and refuse any submissions. Furthermore, The Cord will not print anything considered tobe sexist, racist or homophobic in nature by the staff as a voting body. Eight month, 24 issue Cord subscription rates are: $20.00 for ad- dresses within Canada and $25 outside the country. Co-op students may subscribe at a rate of $10 per four month workterm. The offices of The Cord am located on a floor ofa building in the campus of a university somewhere. The Cord is printed by the fine people at Ricter Web Press inBrantford, Ontario. , The Cor 4 is published weekly in the fall and winter terras. The Cord is a member of the Ontario Community Newspaper Association. Copyright (c) 1990 by WLU Student Publications, ?5 University Ave. West, Waterloo, Ontario, N2L 3C5, No part of this publication may be reproduced without permission of the Editor-in-Chief. 11 IRA should take their The Parliamentary seats Question Why all of a sudden have of the Week people begun to realize that the Letters to the Editor IRA policies are unjustified? (Terrorists at Work, Nov. 1) Why Letters are welcome from all members of the WLU community. What do you like best about cows? has it taken 21 years of bombs, All submissions must be within 400 words and bear the author's bullets, and bloodshed for people real name and phone number for verification. Names may be by Karen Lennox and Tom Szeibel to realize the full impact of the withheld by request. The Cord will print as many letters as violence and destruction of the space allows unless the letter is deemed potentially libellous, or IRA. attempts to incite hatred or violence towards individuals or identifiable groups -- including women, lesbians and gays, ethnic Several weeks ago civilians and religious groups, and people with a disability. were forced to drive trucks full of explosives into army barracks while their wives and children People were held at gunpoint. tractor of fuel, food, or cleaning blackmail them to carry out these were shocked by these deplorable services; telephone workers; acts for the cause? I though acts. vending machine suppliers; and martyrs were willing to die for They're fun to tip not a new workers in shipping and bus com- their cause? However, this is Dana Waele tactic used by the They have panies. According to the IRA you IRA. Ist Year English always forced "collaborators" to And you had the nerve to say, cannot work for the British, but carry out such horrible acts. The Mr. Sullivan, that the Protestant you sure as hell can collect their Globe and Mail recently printed population mistreats the Catho- pogy!! (unemployment pay- the IRA definition of a col- lics? if the IRA has the full- ments). Is this just? If the IRA laborator as anyone who works fledged support of the Catholics, have such a worthy cause, why for the civil service: it is a con- why do they have to threaten and don't they take their seats in the British Parliament under the Sinn Fein political party and voice Teach me, wise one their opinions in a democratic and way? because Mark Hand, help! But alas, nothing. Nothing at peaceful Maybe with Oh wise one, enlighten and all. I don't understand Mark. they are spineless bastards teach me to understand what you Why don't I get anything from no other intent than to wreak write in your "From the Asylum" your writings? Why is it all havoc in the lives of the people of articles. meaningless drivel? Northern Ireland!!!? It's a major at Guelph. I am a poor, confused individ- Lead me to the road of higher ual. Each week I read your arti- understanding, Mark. Richard Derek McClurg Bob Evans cle, hoping to be entertained, Teach me to know as you do. 2nd Year Economics taught, or even shocked. Hoping Teach me to understand. to derive something, be it of Letterscontinue... value or not. Gregory Chang Pink Ink by D.O.S. Weeden

Why address the issue of being gay? Why dis- charter to gays, lesbians, and same sex couples. cuss the problem of being gay? When people ask You may recall the media coverage last winter of me about my sexuality I most often respond with, the gay couple desiring conjugal visits in an "It's none of your business." It's not. Ontario penitentiary. There are many cases now for My Mudder's udders. So why talk about it at all if it is something so spousal benefits in the court and before manage- personal? The reason is because many people who ment of larger corporations. I recently read that Betsy question their sexuality do not know how or where Ontario Hydro would recognize same sex couples. 3rd Year Field Research to go for help in coming to terms with their Many gains have been made to change the qual- sexuality. Many gays and lesbians hold internalized ity of life for gays and lesbians. Much has been homophobia within themselves and feel obligated achieved legally and socially. However, awareness to hide their true selves completely or to succumb must still be raised to abolish homophobia entirely. to the projections of society, a society which holds It is no longer acceptable socially or legally to dis- prejudices based on ignorance and misunderstand- criminate or prejudge blacks, jews or women. Why ing. should it be acceptable to do this with non-visible For many years gays and lesbians have been minorities? persecuted for their sexuality. The term "faggot" Eight hundred fifty people at this university are comes from medieval times when criminals, often bisexual, gay, or lesbian (statistically speaking). imprisoned for sexual deviances, where covered Some, like myself, are completely open about their with oil or tar and burned under the execution pyres sexuality. Some are more comfortable with them- of witches and murderers. During the second world selves but remain less public for their own reasons. We prefer sheep. war, Hitler ordered all senior staff members who However, many people are completely closeted, were gay to be executed - many of them were the living in fear of society's persecution of "queers". Ylad the Impaler, Gay heads of his own security force. Hitler was also By writing this column, I hope to raise aware- Lee, Thatcher the Milk responsible for the imprisonment of gays and les- ness of gay issues. I hope to show people who are Snatcher bians in the work camps. Gay and lesbian prisoners questioning their sexuality that it's "okay to be 4th Year Husbandry were identified by a pink triangular flash on their gay". I hope, in reaching people with homophobic tunics. Because of this, the pink triangle has been attitudes, to provide the opportunity to learn what chosen by gay and lesbian activists as a symbol of life is really like as a gay or lesbian so that they the persecution suffered by the early fighters and may hopefully change their feelings toward this sig- martyrs of our liberation. nificant sub-culture within our society. Traditionally, Judeo-Christian customs have I encourage Cord readers to write with ques- shunned gays and labelled them deviants and sin- tions dealing with sexuality and gay issues. I am ners. While some churches are open to "alternative" not Ann Landers; I will not share personal informa- marriages and lifestyles, most are very much op- tion nor will I respond to or recognize any com- posed to the welcoming ments that are less than integral or useful. By of gays and lesbians into They're udderly wonder- their congregations. receiving your comments, I can best discover what ful. For many years gays and lesbians who sought information you want to see, whether you're gay, the guidance of therapists were put on lesbian, or just discovering something about an medication, Steve Bondy institutionalized, and subjected to such tortures as alternative lifestyle. Ist Year Music shock therapy. Today, it is finally realized that Address correspondence to: Pink Ink column c/o homosexuality is not a disease and is not treatable. the Cord. Names may be withheld upon request. In 1986, sexual orientation was added through Bill 7 into the Ontario Charter of Human Rights. The opinions expressed in this column remain those Currently there are many cases going through the of the author and do not reflect the views of the legal system to grant the rights offered by the Cord, Student Publications, or the Student Union. the cord

12 COMMENT Thursday November 15r 1990 Cord won't give them respect with Tamiae and the School of ness Coordinating Committee"). great deal of effort is placed on TION WHO WAS TO THANK Letters...continued. Business & Economics. Recently, Among other committees work- getting talented individuals who FOR THE SPEAKER'S ...continued. a new committee has been estab- ing under the 3rd and 4th YCC, is have a unique background. It can PRESENCE. There are 16 people lished to represent the needs of the Speaker Series Committee. not always be promised that on the committee who would ap- I am very angry with the 3rd and 4th year Business stu- This committee is comprised of speakers will give an excellent preciate seeing the words, Cord. Let me set the scene: dents at Laurier (appropriately Tamiae members and a Business presentation, but efforts are made "Sponsored by Tamiae, the 3rd Most people are quite familiar entitled, "3rd and 4th year Busi- faculty professor. An attempt is to ensure that the speaker does and 4th Year Coordinating Com- made to bring out talented indi- give the students a new and dis- mittee, and the 5.8.E.", in a Cord viduals who have someting to tinctive perspective on current or review. The next time the Cord Former Imprinter irked share with Business students (and topical issues. An even greater reviews a speaker, it should make anyone else who may be inter- emphasis is placed on ensuring sure that the talent and effort that (he As a music critic myself the fact that I really have no idea ested). that the speaker gets a good turn- were spent on securing a speaker, always had said shamefully) I've what the fuck I'm talking about. Already this year, the com- out, such that the speaker's and getting a turn-out, are a whenever some never of good chuckle I've heard James, mittee has presented lan Smith of presence is worth his/her time. rewarded. That's all that is asked. buffoon writes to the editor y'know, so I thought if I admitted the Moscow MacDonald's, and Here is my problem with the saying "How could you give so & that, I'd better justify it with a lot Ann Morrison who wrote Cord: WHY DO STUDENTS Mark Silver so a bad review, you don't know of smarmy comments about Breaking the Glass Ceiling WORK SO HARD TO ENSURE 3rd and 4th Year Coordinating Plus, what you're talking about!" deserved anonymity. I (Alex Tilley will be appearing on A SUCCESSFUL PRESENTA- Committee Nonetheless, the review of the thought a fake interview would November 29th). TION WHEN THEY CAN'T School of Business & Econom- James LP Gold Mother was so give me a chance to make myself All potential speakers are dis- EVEN BE GRATIFIED BY ics appallingly self-aggrandizing, look really cool and clever. Mind cussed on the Committee, and a HAVING THE CORD MEN- patronizing and stupid -- in short, you, I'd probably never have the so offensive on a purely in- guts to say those things to the tellectual level - that I felt com- band's face. pelled to write. Me: So what's your next step? Administration shouldn't fund Well, I don't know what was Colin: Well, the press release going through Colin Buehler's mentioned this band called the any exclusionary groups mind when he wrote this review, Velvet Underground. I've never but I thought talking to him might heard of them either, so I guess I they(women) face as well as the people who aren't like us are not clear things up. An interview better review this tribute album RE: "WLU HAS A NEW WOMEN'S CENTRE" 4 options available to them." allowed." never really developed, but what thing and cut up the Velvet Un- P. Wouldn't this be the best place It is unfortunate that the first if one had? derground a lot. Maybe I'll NOV.B/90 for the sexes to really start to un- concrete move that the adminis- Me: So why did your review pretend to interview Andy War- I really thought things were going well this derstand each other? If, as I un- tration has made toward better take the form of a fake (and really hol or something. year. We had national air time derstand from most of the women gender relations is ending up as poorly-written) interview with the Me: TACKY! And gross. people from spoke to, the sexism problem such a farce. band? where Laurier I've talked lies mainly with men, what is the Laurier, don't let the Colin: Well, I thought it Derek Weiler eloquently about changing atti- to social change gained by not al- Women's Centre let you believe would be the best way to disguise Former Arts Editor, Imprint tudes on campus with regards sexism. We haven't had any lowing men into the Women's that they speak for all Laurier panty raids, any obscene posters, Centre? women, for as long as they con- WLU Discrimination and even the Cord has cleaned up Can you imagine the uproar if tinue such exclusionary proce- its act to some extent. the administration funded another dures, they will never speak for Discrimination. By any other resources of the centre, the I elitist group like this. I can pic- me. name, the result is the same. If a organizers have effectively Then read the last issue of the Cord. ture it now "Welcome to the woman is denied membership in defeated their objective. Solving I read that the administration Men's or Asian or WASP Centre, Jana Watson an exclusive male club, it is dis- discrimination with more dis- is funding the new crimination. If males are not al- crimination cannot and will not Women's $12,000. fine, lowed equal access to a resource work. Centre That's great, in fact. Arrogance centre, it is acceptable. In this Once again, it is hypocritical and case, the issue is reverse dis- to expect males to appreciate gen- Then I read that men will not crimination, and those who sup- der differences, while denying be admitted to the centre. I thought, well, maybe this is port it are blatantly hypocritical. them access to the tools which bigotry hurts The WLU Women's Centre might help them come to ap- because it is a crisis centre for has opened, and males do not preciate these differences. We women who have been In his letter to the editor of armed civil rights march. I would Nope. basically have equal access to the resources therefore request that the traumatized. It's November 8, regarding Tim Sul- not characterize such action as a which the centre provides. These organizers of the Women's a resource centre. livan's 'Terrorists at Work' arti- "peace-keeping presence" as has Laurier citizens, $12,000 are the same men who, in part, Centre re-think this policy. So, cle, Dwyer O'Niell attempted to Mr. O'Niell. of hard is are funding the Centre through a If this does not occur, we your earned money present himself as some sort of Also, there is much un- $12,000 grant from the univer- demand that the University com- being used to support an organi- expert on the troubles of Northern certainty as to what would hap- zation which discriminates sity. This position must be pletely withdraw support from Ireland. Instead, he revealed the pen after a British Army with- protested. this organization. The current against half of the campus. By type of arrogance and stubborn- drawal. I would like to know We are unsure of the value of situation is unacceptable. not allowing men into the Centre, ness that has helped to perpetuate where Mr. O'Niell got his figure a Women's Centre, as opposed to they are discriminating against the problem. of 200% to explain the resulting the originally proposed gender re- Douglas A. Isbister men and women, men aren't First, I want to clarify some amount of increase in violence. lations centre. However, in pre- Mark J. Rittinger given the opportunity to "discuss things. The origins of the problem Was it arbitrary, or does he have back venting males from using the Scott W. Marnoch the issues and problems in Ireland can be traced some actual facts to back this hundreds of years to the time up!? when the British invaded the is- I have a real problem with land. During the Ulster Plantation Mr. O'Neill's definition of demo- Remembering of the 1600's most of the Irish not the dead cracy, apparently it does in- Catholics forcefully had their the rights of minorities. so many words. At the time, they probably seemed clude by Wiebe land expropriated to be handed of the Joe so important, so real, but they were just words. Have you ever heard over to English and Scottish majority'? Take a How many people died to gain a piece of land? Or 'tyranny of the Protestant settlers. at Ireland for a Did you wear a poppy on Sunday? to hold one? How many died to save the world look Northern The contemporary problems prime example. The Catholics in On this past Remembrance Day, I remembered from the evil threat of (your choice here)? came to a head from 1968-1972 the North have been subjected to all those who died in past wars. Their lives, or rath- How many died because their religion told them to? following years of social, eco- indiscriminate internment without their deaths deserve a memorial to remind us of How many died because their leaders were bigoted, er, nomic, and political oppression trial, various employment dis- their ultimate sacrifice. We are told they died so power-hungry, insane, or simply stubborn? Those by the Protestants towards the crimination, and have had their that we could live in a better society today. We are in charge can always make it seem as if their cause Catholics. At this time, Catholics voting capabilities rendered prac- told they gave their lives for the good and right. is the one, true answer. How many died for these initiated a number of peaceful, tically through ger- I do not remember their deaths for those rea- causes? useless civil demonstrations to protest rymandering techniques. sons. Their lives were not erased in a mass I do not remember those people for the wars in their conditions under Protestant What is the solution? Ob- crucifixion that purified the rest of us. The poppy I which they died. There have been wars that pitted hegemony. viously must be some sort wear signifies the sorrow I feel for their loss of life. brother against brother. Wars that have turned 18 there The British forces entered the of power sharing between the two My mourning is for the millions of fellow humans year-old boys into savage killers. Wars that used scene to supposedly quell groups to allow for fair political that have been cut down before they could experi- devastating weapons to eradicate hundreds of thou- violence that had broken out be- participation and a more equal ence life. I am only twenty years old, and I am con- sands of human lives. Every war has caused death, tween the two groups. However, and democratic process. tinually at how truly young that is, but and even one death is too many. amazed it did not take long for the Army that arrogance and there were many soldiers who were forced to kill The memorial we should observe is one that It is sad to side with the Protestants. If bigotry, such as that espoused by and die before they were even that old. So many shows us the butchery, the barbarism, the savagery you want evidence, just look at O'Neill, continues to be used and people never fell in love, or had the chance to grow that is war. By remembering their deaths, we the events of January 30,1972, continues to perpetuate the con- the person they loved. How precious little should realize that "Lest we forget" means "Never old with more popularly known as the flict. time they had to experience so much! again!" No one is more expendable than another. 'Bloody Sunday' massacre when I not those people for dying for Every life is precious. do remember British paratroopers shot and Rory Moss their causes. The reasons and justifications are just Never again! killed thirteen people at an un- the cord Thursday November 15, 1990 13

The University Blues by Kevin Matchstick comics STRANGE WAYS... BY ED RUSK

RIB.

GAZETTE COMICS... the cord- the cord Thursday Thursday November 15,1990 FEATURE 14 FEATURE November 15y 1990 15 Literacy: read for your life

a liter- Andy explains of the are by no means stupid. *Waterloo County Board UNESCO, in 1965, declaring person declared that a is — teaching sessions that re- You have to be pretty of Education person ate it ranges from committment and *Waterloo Public Library literate "when he has ac- grade 4 to grade 9, by Steve Burke quire smart to get by without "It's like a shadow, it's always with you". dedication. A retired being literate", Andy cau- *Waterloo Region Separate quired the essential depending on the coun- senior, Andy discovered tions. School Board knowledge and skills try studied and the sur- a few years ago that he The tutors are equally which enable him to vey conducted. However, has most agree that a literate needed a challenge, and varied in age and back- The group already engage in all those ac- ' Andy has been read- cesible. Employers should profits. They could had a desire to contribute ground, although they produced several televi- tivities in which literacy person is one who can ing for about 70 years. the examine the literacy sponsor a workshop in to the community by put- are predominantly fe- comprehend printed Shakespeare, Dickens, media at a level common needs of their employees, plain language, or pro- back male. They range from Eliot, Atwood... ting something in. to his or her community. considering whether up- vide equipment, goods or Harry has been read- He applied through a lo- university students to grading would benefit services to local literacy retired seniors. ing for about 5 years. cal advertisement and Why Illiteracy the workers and increase groups. after a session "We're to experience what illiteracy is Now he can read a news- training really only "You want is a Problem paper, a menu, a soup began tutoring for the scratching the surface", like? Go into a restaurant and ask a label... council. he laments. "Progress is waitress to read the menu to you. Go to the Persons who cannot read Praise of Learning slow indeed". he What supermarket and ask a particular and write cannot partici- suggests, however, is that for brand when standing right next to the dis- pate fully in society and Learn the elementary things! "people should read For those whose time ha: come play. Go to any government and say are likely to become iso- about 30 minutes each office lated and alienated. It is never too late! "Being illiterate is like trying to pick conducted out Ask the phone day". A study you can'tfill the form. and are Learn the ABC, it won't be enough, something up with both hands tied behind on 5 Reading writing grade students company for a waiver on directory as basic skills But Learn it! Don't be dismayed by it! your back showed that they scored Tutors participate in a 12 people live in developing needed for sistance charges because you can't read and train- Begin! You must know everything! 40% higher on reading hour training workshop, countries, in Canada employment alone 1 in 5 adults the phone book. That will give you some ing. You must take over the leadership. tests after increasing and are then matched cannot Many individuals read, write or handle idea. But you can never the skills have their extracurricular with a student, who has feel frustra- lacking these Learn, man the asylum! numbers well enough to ". in Andy is tutor, "There is no reading time from 6.6 previously met the Place- tion, the anxiety difficulty in qualifying Harry's typical function effectively in Learn, man in the prison! one of hun- student or minutes to 20 minutes. ment Co-ordinator. for employment. The and over one tutor", he says. society. Half of these Learn, woman in the kitchen! dred volunteers at The students in Gold, a profes- Tutors pay a nominal declining youth popula- the range age Joseph went to high school, and Learn, sixty year olds! Council of from the late teens the sor of for 35 fee to become certified, tion and shortage of Literacy to English a third graduated. You must take over the leadership. Kitchener-Waterloo, a 70s. Some are and of the and are asked to make a sion specials this year, is required for effective skilled workers mean physically years, author In response to the Seek the school, you who are homeless! non-profit book Read for Your Life one year commitment to and is involved with "Al- functioning in his group that employers must organization handicapped, but most need for awareness and Acquire knowledge, you who shiver! devoted to teaching are healthy adults who writes: their student, meeting phabet Soup" (98.7 FM and community, and retrain workers to meet aid, the Ontario govern- his attainments You who are hungry, reach for the adults how to read on a have simply missed out regularly and keeping a Wednesdays, 11:00 a.m.), when in demands for new skills. With the help fiction, you ment has allocated an ad- and book; it is a weapon. one-on-one basis. Using a on the education system of record of the student's a local radio program reading, writing Workers with poor read- can learn to understand ditional $5 million over arithmetic make it You must take over the leadership. technique called the or are victims of its in- progress. The tutor keeps that uses plain language pos- ing and writing skills own two years above its pres- him Laubach method, Andy consistencies and in- your feelings, identi- regular contact with the for its listeners. sible for to continue may be difficult to ent total of $130 million. skills Don't be frightened to ask, comrade! and Harry read through adequacies. "They come fying the sources your Placement Co-ordinator to use these retrain. Illiteracy costs of It is estimated that 1 in 4 WHAT IS ILLITERACY? Don't be talked into anything.. manuals that use phonet- from all walks of life. anxieties, angers, likes and and will find additional towards his own and the Canadian businesses people in Ontario is il- Check for yourself! ics, pictures, and every- Some are even executives dislikes. Fiction can reflect, support through confer- community's develop- more than $4 billion a literate. The diversity of the term You don't know. day examples to teach who have learned to dis- like a magic mirror, the ences and newsletters. ment" year. The cost reflects Other local illiteracy suggest Another used Scrutinize the bill. students how to cope in a guise their problem well veiled parts and There are, however, organizations may widely losses in productivity, in- of self life. a called where much misunder- It's you who must pay it. society that not only because they have secre- Stories act to change the other volunteer positions belong to group definition is that a liter- dustrial accidents related the Waterloo Region Lit- standing of the concept is "who Put your finger on each item. promotes literacy, but taries". There is no cor- reader's thought and per- besides tutoring, such as ate person one to" illiteracy, and the need Coalition, which may have Ac- with Ask how did this get here? demands it. relation between I.Q. and ception. Stories can often fundraising, training, eracy developed. can understanding to replace workers who maintains READ, to The Winston You must take over the leadership. "An illiterate is essen- literacy whatsoever, and reorganize thinking, help- board of directors, and Project cording both read and write a are difficult to retrain. Il- a referral info-line service the term il- tially a non-reader, and many illiterates have ing to resolve problems by clerical office assistance. Dictionary, short, simple statement literacy costs Canadian that the follow- literate means "ignorance Bertold Brecht one with an inability to compensated for their reviewing the past from a supports on his everyday life". society as a whole $10.7 While 95% of these of letters; want of learn- write coherently", Andy weakness by developing different viewpoint. In other ing organizations: Opinions vary as to what billion a year through ing; especially to level of education says. "It's a two-way a greater capacity for words, fiction can be a inability should lost earnings, industrial read or write". street of give and take", memory. "The illiterate powerful agent for creative be the standard for accidents, unemploy- and healthy change. ment, and federal prison "It's not the most wonderfulfeeling. It and related education The K-W Literacy tears you apart inside. All the people I've costs. Council was founded in let down. It's just one lis another". 1980, and is the largest after What You Can Do and one of the oldest in Private citizens can Canada. Its mandate is to become volunteer tutors, reduce the level of il- The Council is one of *Cambridge Literacy help to raise funds for literacy in the Region of many local organizations Council community groups, or Waterloo, estimated at currently responding to *Cambridge Unemployed develop an event to pro- 45,000 people. Reading, the challenge of Interna- Help Centre mote International Liter- writing, numeracy, com- tional Literacy Year, *Conestoga College acy Year. Students can munication and learning designated by the United *Core Literacy make the issue of literacy skills comprise the train- Nations with a goal of *English in the Working the subject of research ing provided by tutors. stimulating actions that Environment projects, seminars and The one teach one ap- will reduce illiteracy *Kitchener Public papers. They can also proach is seen by stu- Library adapt their communica- dents as a less threaten- permanently by the year *Newspapers in Education tion skills in order to in- ing and more convenient 2000. It estimates that For further information on illiteracy contact (K-W Record) corporate plain language alternative to the in- there are 965 million il- the K-W Literacy Council (884-0900) or — literates in the world ~ 27 *University of Waterloo: language the reader timidating and less Teaching Resources and the Project Read Literacy Referral Informa- percent of the adult pop- "Dropping out of school can understand; that is anonymous classroom at- Continuing Education tion (884-1318 mosphere. ulation. never done me no harm." clear, concise and ac- Lines and 653-0165). 16

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* ' THURSDAY FRIDAY SATURDAY SUNDAY MONDAY TUESDAY WEDNESDAY pi[l| fTefH fi7]|| [is] || pH| jMJ| W\ Amnesty International Christmas Sale in the Interview Skills Work- Concourse 9am to 4pm. shop 2:30-4:00 pm in Buy a shirt and a Christ- room PIOO7. fe*turing Campus Clubs Presi- favourite chum"'chum. ** WI U EnS em- dents meeting 5:30 pm ;. WUSC presents "A Dry inroomPlo2l. ble, Minor Infraction Jazz Choir, and more in White Season" coffee Amnesty International the Doors op<:n house. Music and dis- meeting 5:30 pm. Con- Science Fiction/Fantasy Turret al 8 m Tickets 3>4 at cussion will follow. Cord staff meeting 2:30 sult Board for Club meeting 6:00 pm P - 6:00 pm in room 2E7. pm. details. room 2E6-2. door- Thursday November 15,1990 17

SCENE JAZZBUTCHER 3 M's and Kuwait by James Neilson the music. Until I've got the thing that's more worth listening music down on some kind of to than "Gonna give you a whole The following bits and pieces tape, I don't know what length of lot of love Baby." I mean check it are segments of an interview lyric I'm required to write. You out man.... James Neilson had with lead man might think well...You're limiting A whole bunch of people will for the Jazfc Butcher Conspiracy, yourself as a writer there but in a get together in the music busi- Pat Fish. Caught live at Guelph's way its quite good. It brings out ness. People go in the studio and Peter Clark Hall last Friday night, the exigence. spend tens of thousands of dollars Fish voiced a variety of opinions I've got three verses with four getting this big musical vehicle. on music, Monty Python movies, lines and I've got to say it all in And for what? For a bunch of pif- Michael Jackson and lots of other that. It can be quite a good dis- fle that's scribbled down on the oddities unfit to print here. cipline. I like music. Perhaps back of an envelope in blue wax some people in Canada have got crayon. "Baby! Baby! Baby!" It's On the origins of the song the impression that I'm some like making a Rolls Royce for the "Happy Hour" kind of an intellectual lyricist dog! type who's bringing messages to Most of the stuff we do isn't "I plunked myself down at the public and is just using pop wacky in our estimation. It's just work one morning and thought: 'I music as a means to do it. That's a lyric. If people want to laugh at The Devil Is My Friend. hate it here. I'm feeling really not the case. I really, really like it that's fine. They paid their Photo: James Neilson anti-social. I want to get horribly making music. The act of making money for it, they own it. They horribly drunk.' So I wrote that music really turns me on. The can masturbate to it if they want. Python movies? Yes it's the same here only we instead, because they wouldn't let lyrics are... well basically I'm Basically what I'm doing is writ- No. Well the chief problem can't fake the accents as well. me get drunk at 10:30 in the trying to write something that's ing some good words to make a with Monty Python movies in En- PAT LAUGHS AND SPARKS morning. not going to insult people's in- pop song instead of some hideous gland is everywhere you go you UP ANOTHER CAMEL. Generally I start with a vague telligence. instrumental thing. find students reciting the lines. idea of a title I start and then with I'm just trying to write some- Do you watch a lot of Monty It gets a bit tiresome. Continued on page 23 Wine, poetry and more wine by Jon Stover these things. By the bucket-load, even. And so, while I have three business cards in my possession Part One: That's Mr. Philosopher to you! which must have resulted from networking (Oh! What a word!) with artistic types, the notes I took Author Carter Scholz once argued that one of are essentially incomprehensible. The one thing I the great dehumanizing, de-communalizing powers can still read goes like this: of the 20th century was the creation of recording technology. With records, cassette tapes and com- There's a guy in a green sweater standing be- pact discs -- and the proliferation of a music indus- hind the piano player. I guess he's the stunt double. try dedicated to selling pre-recorded music to the Maybe they're filming Die Hard 3 later tonight. masses — community music events have dwindled Terrorists take over a small Waterloo cafe! Bruce in number. People don't get together to play instru- Willis is having a cup of coffee in a booth, and ments, sing songs and produce musical shows the manages to save everyone in the cafe with a way they used to. (unintelligible — there's some wine spilled here. I The gist of Scholz's argument was this: that guess it wasfunny at the time.) being engaged in a musical endeavor in which the personal element is involved is a better musical ex- I do remember that Robert Wiljer (an area poet) perience than listening to a recorded performance. read some very good poetry for about half-an-hour, Community musical get-togethers were (and are) and had an especially nice Robert Frost-esque poem superior to recorded performances, even when about the Kitchener Market. I think Mr. Wiljer was those recorded performances are by extraordinarily a bit looped at the end of the night (yeah, like I talented musicians, because important factors have wasn't), because when I attempted to interview him been removed from the artistic equation in the latter the conversation went something like this: case - the personal element, the interactionary ele- Me: Hi. Jon Stover. (They shake hands.) ment, the sense of being part of art, as opposed to I'm from the Wilfrid Laurier University student being apart from it. newspaper. Him: Ah! Are you a William agreed student? Blake would have with Scholz's Me: Yeah, yeah. argument ("Would that all God's were children Him: Where do you go? prophets" and all that). Cafe Bon Choix, a musi- Me: Wilfrid Laurier University. cal/poetic performance series staged at the Cafe on Him: Ah yes, yes. What do do there? Regina Street every month, you subscribes to that idea Me: I'm a student. as - well the idea of art as an interactionary me- Him: Ah, yes, dium. yes. A student! At the University of Waterloo! Nice meeting you! On Tuesday, November 6, I attended a per- Me: Yes, yes! Nice to meet you! (They shake hands) formance at the Cafe Bon Choix. It was a night. (Thankfully, a giant bear came into the ca.fi at this point, and I had tofight it several minutes, thus Cafe Part Two: Wined Up to the Wasted for Bon Choix poetry nights: cool pants, nice lids, Land breaking the somber, intellectual atmosphere creat- great poetry readings, free Who could ed by previous wine. ask for I'd love to talk about the great performances I the conversation.) more? (maybe some cash?...) saw last Tuesday night. But they serve free wine at Continued on page 19 the cord

18 SCENE ThursdayNovember Is% 1990 The end oftheKing: Finally by Jon Stover twinge, but it does. As Oscar good. Because people who are Lost Ark. They are part of a Laurence novel, and just as un- Wilde notes, it is both surface and able to argue - and like arguing well-balanced diet. I don't admire likely to be fulfilled.

- Part Three: In which a symbol an abyss and a great - over complex issues are good. people who boast of not having What happens when some- pretentious conclusion big mountain existing all at once, Because beauty is good. thing reaffirm- Because read a book since Grade 10, but I that another human does ing the meaning the same point space, in a and of life, liberty in of ideas creations and other don't like people who sneer at, makes us echo both painfully and and the reading of Stephen King symbolic sort of way, and with all stuff that make your head hurt is say, Die Hard, either. And I'm joyfully, and without any finger novels is narrowly missed, like an the gradations between mountain not sure where the borderlines are to put on anything anywhere to iceberg in a sandstorm. and abyss existing simultaneously in that balanced diet. There are, I explain the fullness of the Having come here, to the in that space. Art doesn't mean think, moments in The Empire , "Why?"? shores of the Promised Land, to anything exactly - what it is is Strikes Back and a truck-load of I've probably muddied things the very beach which Moses and meaning. Where are you now, Star Trek episodes which cross- more than cleared them up here. his wacky Hebrewites landed on Paul Tillich? over the boundaries of fun- John Gardner used to write about when, via motorboats and ding- 2) The Mona Lisa is enter- machine-ness (Pauline Kael's "moral fiction"; Susan Sontag hies, they escaped the monolithic taining. So is Die Hard. So is term, not mine) into otherrealms. (and Oscar Wilde, too) write tyranny of the Pharaoh and his good sex. I could keep this up, The converse is true of, say, about the fact that, as Wilde hired guns to land safely at but I'm not. King Lear, in which there is ex- notes, "There is no moral or im- Normandy, I find 3) No. No. Maybe. cruciating and somewhat moral art. There is only good or myself...undecided. 4) I don't know. Is Wayne manipulative suspense. Even at- bad art." I don't think there are Not about "Is Stephen King a Gretzky an artist? Is a really tempting to say there are dif- necessarily sides to pick. good writer?" He is, no regrets, engrossing video game Art, liter- ferences between Raiders of the I wouldn't even want to begin no apologies on my part. ature, or masturbation? Is Fear of Lost Ark and Raging Bull to draw a line between moral art No -- undecided about how to a Black Planet greater than strikes me as a potentially snob- and something which simply explain why he is. Indeed, un- Sergeant Pepper's Lonely bish thing to say unless I stress moralizes at the audience. Are decided about whether the argu- Hearts Club Band? Is the theory the fact that Raiders of the Lost Robert Mapplethorpe's pictures ment should be made here at all. of relativity Art? Why is a mouse Ark is not a thing inferior to of children exposing their I have some questions to when it spins? Raging Bull. They pursue dif- genitalia art, or are they exploita- pose: See what I mean? I could, ferent mandates. tive pornography? Is a great work 1) What is Art? right now, go back and re-answer And none of this confronts of art simply a fun-machine on 2) What is entertainment? all these questions. So could you. whether Wayne Gretzky is a bet- steroids? Can Art both entertain 3) Are the terms mutually ex- The problem isn't actually in ter artist than Michelangelo, or and hurt at the same time? clusive? Can something be 1) arguments over Art. The problem whether his work has more last- Stephen King, once, from The without 2) being involved? Vice lies in the fact that not enough ing worth than Samuel Beckett's Stand: "Do people ever learn? I versa? people talk about these things. If good. Because being Og the canon. I do know that I would don't know. I don't know." 4) What are legitimate media you're in university, then you Cave-guy is not such a good thing give quite a bit to see John Rig- Stephen King, twice and in which Art is possible? should be here to get expanded. when suddenly someone hands gins (fullback, New York Jets thrice: From The Dead Zone: Some thoughts. Not focussed. Well, not exacdy. you the controls of a 747 and says and Washington Redskins from "Not the potter, but the potter's 1) Art is unquantifiable, but it We need lots of experts, lots of "Fly this baby, Og, I'm tired and 1970-1985, "Give me the ball" he clay." From Different Seasons: is possible to know it when you good thinkers in specific in- retiring too." said during the 1983 play-offs, "It is the tale, not he who tells it." see it, because it goes down - stances. But we need people who I am not tired of things geared and by God, did he run with it!) And, from Four Past Mid- way down -- and you can't see can tell Hamlet from a handsaw, to thrill me which actually do a run again, and that that desire is night: "Shit or git." the bottom, and you don't know it too. good job of it - I like roller certainly as painful in my mind as Thanks, Steve. makes the back of your brain Why? Because knowledge is coasters, I like Raiders of the a longing for one more Margaret Exeunt. TOP W 1 Aiiffir rented movies

- £9*;w For the week of Nov. 15 Nov. 22 112 Dine & Dance Bar 28 King St. North Waterloo, Ontario 1) Blind Fury 2) Bird On A Wire Yourself ?KS!£ M,,n Pppp |t A+ 5) Back To The Future 111 I |§ ii p|| I OI 11 1 y fc? O 6) Black Christmas 7) Angel Town 8) The Hunt For Red October Thursdays are University Night 9) Total Recall t 10) Wild Orchid

Easy to Find... Hard to Leave 1 mmnmsMmmmmmMM the cord Thursday November 15. 1990 SCENE 19 Haywire committed to Nuthouse by Chris Skalkos (keyboard player) some provoca- tive questions. Actually the whole Upon listening to Haywire's band begged and pleaded to be new release NUTHOUSE I was included but their dressing room instantly confounded, flab- big enough to fit every- bergasted and down-right wasn't shocked. body. I began my interview with Immediately after pressing the an educated question. play button, I was engulfed with a "Is it true that roadies are at barrage of hard-hitting, no- the bottom of the female groupie nonsense rock'n'roll. In other food chain?" Well, maybe not but words, I was knocked on my ass. "How would you describe your I couldn't believe that this was new LP NUTHOUSE?" the same "sophomore" pop-rock "Definitely a rock record. It band from P.E.I, that produced makes you step back," Dave states up a lot Top 10 hits like "Black & Blue" front. "It's heavier, and "Dance Desire". the way the band first sounded Although their new material before we made our firstrecord." stooped to conquer I was not easi- "Why such a dramatic contrast ly impressed, however, because from the last two albums BAD this band has a reputation for BOYS and DON'T JUST STAND sounding better live than off THERE?" record or disc, so I meandered to "People see it as an overnight their Friday night gig at the change but it's really a three year Highlands in Cambridge to con- process. You can't sound the firm this myself. same with each album, you have The Highlands is a large to grow as artists." the past the has been venue that has a legal capacity of "In band See the dance. See the desire. Is or Homegrown contest winners, and he black is he blue? He is seven hundred but can only seat certainly surrounded by recipients of the Golden Award a lot of smog/smoke/dry ice product. Yes, one hundred. It greatly resembles but did it help to for best song (Dance Desire) at them sound better? Guess we'll have to see. Do the inside of a run-down barn that you love them? is should have had Enter At Your the reputed World Song Festival Jack blind when Jill is in love. Photo: Chris Skalkos Own Risk signs on the washroom in Japan. Are you using that suc- doors. Surprisingly, it has staged cess as a springboard for your doing, but, their first single but they can't seem to get a break former's Rule of Thumb: never high calibre artists such as Meat- current release?" "Short End Of A Wishbone" is in Canada. completely satisfy an audience, loaf, Kim Mitchell, and David "It doesn't matter how many getting a lot of air play (strictly Haywire's performance was a always leave them craving for Wilcox. On this particular night it awards we may have won, the FM). well choreographed stage show more so they in turn buy your was taking advantage of bottom line is the strength of the The opening band, BMG highlighted by an elaborate light record in quest for fulfillment. Ontario's new liquor law as this tunes that get you from step to recording artists, Big House are system and a frequently discharg- Their concert was just too long, was an all ages show, with step, and it has to be supported by worth mentioning here. They are ing dry ice machine, although the almost to the point of being colourful bracelets for minors. a strong live performance. We best described as a cross between hazy and sometimes distorted repetitive. The cut and discarded bracelets don't do anything on an album Guns'n'Roses and Killer Dwarfs, sound left much to be desired. Overall the performance never on the floor were an indication of that we can't do live. On this complete with a pick juggling Paul MacAusland is not a great had a chance to build up to a how well this system was work- record we tried to capture the en- guitarist and more hair than the singer but his vocals were solid climax. The opening song went ing. ergy we've always had." House of Masters can produce in all night and his energy level for the jugular as a high level of Before the show I got the op- As of yet it's too early to a year. They have an EP that is never faltered. Marvin Birt ex- intensity was maintained through- portunity to ask Dave Rashed measure how well the LP is doing well south of the border, hibited some impressive guitar out the entire show. The large playing, laying down some hot- audience on hand appreciated leads in between riffs. Ron Swit- their old songs like "Fire" and zer on bass and Sean Kilbride be- "Hard Reaction" but the songs on hind the kit were similarly tight. the new album have no moral Frost-like poetics Their encore was an unbalanced value and are seemingly inspired medley of the Beatles' "Long Tall by unmotivated rock'n'roll harsh- Sally", Little Richard's "Tutti Continued from page 17 full glasses, folks) of white wine, and some snacks. ly illustrated with songs like Frutti" and Led Zeppelin's "Rock The Laurier Chamber Ensemble played a very I recall an especially good tart. This is "Wild Wild" and "Livin' it Up". custard/fruit and Roll". As if the bits and nice Schubert piece. The singer for the ensemble not a bad deal, liquor prices continued. Keep this in Haywire has traded in their pieces of these songs were not had a beautiful, crystalline voice. Jeff Kohl played mind, as the next performance night flashy garments and boyish looks is November enough to the set with, some original compositions on both the piano and 27. end they for the stereotypical dark shades had to come back and do Aeros- on the guitar. After the formal proceedings were Oh, yeah. The Cafe Bon Choix coor- and leather clad rocker image. If series is mith's "Same Old Song'n'Dance" over, he even assayed "Alison" by Elvis Costello. dinated through WLU. The cafe itself is located at you want to check out Haywire for a second encore; this was a Outstanding! 100 Regina Street, and tickets are available at don't expect to see their past im- the major flaw in their performance. I was disappointed more door, or from WLU English professor Andy age of "nice boys" playing pop- that there wasn't Stubbs. Well-established musicians who poetry read. Also, the Cafe becomes a bit cramped. There's an open microphone at the end of the night rock music, and the same applies have material spanning over three And there weren't a lot of students there, probably for anyone interested in reading their own et to their new release. However, if poetry albums shouldn't have to do un- due to the $15 price tag. But for $15 (well, actually, al. hard rock'n'roll with a brain- original tunes when they're trying bashing audience is up your alley as Cord's man-in-the-trenches, I got a free pass), I Trust me. You'll remember the night. Or at to promote their new LP. you'll your had more than half-a-dozen glasses (and they were least, you'll remember there was a night. have hands full...and Whatever. They also defied the Per- then some.

COMPACT DISC RENTALS

Featuring New Releases From...

S 2nd ANNIVERSARY

Vanillalce jL \ Bpm - lam STUDENTS RECEIVE 1/3 OFF LIFETIME MEMBERSHIP 111 fl\ L fllli initio MEET PHIL'S GRANDSON! CD EMPORIUM PRIZES! PRIZES! 402 KING ST. N. (AT WEBER) WATERLOO 747-2166 P»L*A*C»£ PRIZES! the cord 20 SCENE Thursday November 15,1990 The local Results are good by play ex- Steve Burke young musicians with bone of the band in the studio. perform their strongest material, all three, Flitton, bassist Mike pensive technical toys, laughing a Incorporating influences rang- playing only three cover songs ~ Bond and "Am I losing my mind? Can you drummer Mark Leh- lot, and being rather pleased with ing from Bauhaus, The Cure, Neil the best, a vibrant rendition of man, to be a check me on this? Am I losing my skilled and tight the result. Young, Sex Pistols, Zep- in Sun". Of mind?" Led "Blister the the group, playing with great speed Local threesome The Result pelin, "and a billion other bands", original songs, several stood out and accuracy to "It's your You can't the delight of fuckiri wife! showcased music from their first The Result have nonetheless de- as sure picks for the album, par- friends, family, followers, play the part because of.your and and forthcoming CD at Gler's last veloped a distinctive sound, and ticularly "Lack of Faith", "More several walk-in vagrants. fuckin' wife!" weekend, offering an eclectic and have written 50 songs for their Than Words", and"The Idiot The band hasn't announced This is what I expected to energetic evening of blues- first release. Song". any more dates, as they plan to hear going into a studio to watch country-folk-punk-thrash- Friday and Saturday night "Indian Summer", a com- return to the studio. Look for a band record an album. What it flavoured rock. gave the band the opportunity to mentary on the Oka crisis, proved their CD in the spring. actually involved was getting up Each in their early 20's, the before noon on a Sunday, being three have been playing instru- transported to a secret downtown- ments virtually since conception, Kitchener location in the biting and have been a unit for 5 years. Canadian cold, stopping for cof- Guitarist/ Keyboardist/ Vocalist/ fee and donuts, being escorted up Lyricist and perennial bad joke a decrepit stairway in an aban- teller Dave Flitton displayed a doned warehouse and lounging in wide range of talent live, and a makeshift studio to watch three revealed himself to be the back-

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iiwrihip Kb it's Ml SATURDAYS Hgj IlfJ^SrMll€m ■ JB sfl ADMISSION |i| V BEFORE 9:00 P.M. Hj| 125 years of Labatt's I PA: 3j5 New Years Tickets on sale Now fif™ What beer ®C A ten minute walk from both Waterloo Universities ignß was meant 341 Marsland Dr., Waterloo Wn to be. J A superior old-style ale brewed by the traditional top fermentation process. the cord Thursday November 15, 1990 SCENE 21 Music Faculty: an eclectic mix by Bill Legate this was about the most difficult Stravinsky-influenced back- Marsailis, was spotlighted on Many of the pieces were in piece of the evening, which be- ground has created a phenomenal trumpet in many pieces, and he tribute to Count Bassy and his This past week the students of came apparent when some dif- composer who should be watched displayed his comprehension of band, who would have been Ihe Faculty of Music outdid ficulties arose. Still, this 17 tone in the future, as should all of jazz well. proud of the ensemble's per- themselves, presenting two con- piece created a mysterious atmo- these student composers who cre- Other soloists included Terry formances. certs of modern music in the Aird sphere, employing the hammered ated a very impressive program. Gardiner on trombone, Sean This week, watch for the Building Recital Hall. dulcimer to add to the mystery. On Saturday November 11, Smith: tenor sax, Bradley Penderecki String Quartet, Thurs- On Wednesday November 7, Arun Pal also had a piece of the WLU Jazz Ensemble, con- Fauteux: trumpet, Steve Lehman: day November 15 at 12:00 and WLU Student Composers, his own in the program. "A Back- ducted by Ron Schirm, performed piano, Lee Heidrich: piano and Sunday at 8:00pm. Both shows directed by Peter Hatch, Gary wards Approach to a Note" is a various works in the Recital Hall. incredible percussion work by are in the Recital Hall. Also, the Kulesha and Rodney Sharman, trio for piano, trumpet and per- Soloist William Sperandei, who Todd Cottrell and Arun Pal, espe- WLU Wind Ensemble plays Fri- performed nine original works cussion; a very 20th century piece is going to New Orleans Univer- cially in "Mira Mira", a Latin- day November 15 at 8:00pm, in written by students in their com- that regrettably couldn't always sity in January to study with Ellis American based piece. the Recital Hall. position class. The show began be heard. The piano was often with a piece by Cam McKittrick swallowed-up by the music entitled "Bloc", a saxophone around it. Still, the excitement quartet, followed by "Pillar of created in the transitions made for help by a satisfying piece. Arun's gradu- raise Strength" written Douglas Bands ROOF Spence who performed on violin ation piece is to be played by the SPECIAL TO THE CORD discuss issues ranging from welfare problems to with David Sinclair: guitar, Mark WLU Wind Ensemble later this housing to dealing with past abuse." Norris: violin cello, and mezzo- year. If you like to see your ticket money go to a wor- The building that houses ROOF at 121 Duke soprano Stephanie Rowe singing A haunting flute acappella thy cause, the Waterloo Motor Inn hosts a benefit Street is set to be demolished by the city in the new text by Emily Dickenson. entitled, "Morgana" by Helga concert Saturday November 17 featuring the Pock- year. ROOF has acquired a new building but ex- Violin and voice combined Jensen was performed by Jennifer et Weasels and Dark Out with proceeds going to a tensive renovations must be made before it meets for a nice duet, while the cello Henry. The lights were turned centre for streetkids. living standards. provided a strong ground, that, down throughout the hall, adding The event hopes to raise over $2000 for ROOF ROOF receives contributions from churches and regrettably, occasionally over- to a magical atmosphere that (Reaching Our Outdoor Friends) from the sale of foundations like Kiwanis, the Federation of Stu- powered Rowe's voice, losing the reminded me of the Arthurian 500 tickets at $5 each, sponsorship, flowers, t-shirts dents at UW, businesses, radio stations and many text. legend. A very electrifying stage and pizza. They also solicit participation of local private citizens. The city has also given ROOF a Fourth year percussion player presence in Jennifer helped make businesses and arts groups. grant, but does not provide on-going support. The Arun Pal performed by memory "Helga's Piece" very powerful. The ROOF agency in Kitchener was founded a money raised by the concert will greatly aid their "Razor's Edge" for marimba. Us The final piece of the evening year ago by Kate Millar to deal with streetkids in efforts. reoccurring theme leads to new was "Cantata" by Roger Bergs. It the area. The children at the centre range upward The show is being organized under the auspices ideas although tension caused by is the story of the prodigal son, from eleven years of age. of MPM Productions, a group that has been raising a repeating note was not resolved with a sacred text sung by Maria "ROOF is committed to caring for the youth in money for social agencies in Kitchener-Waterloo until the end of the piece. All Riedstra: soprano, Kathryn Jef- our community", spokesman Mike Barton says, for four years. In 1988, the organization raised an said, lan Graham has composed a frey: alto and John Watson: "who, for various reasons, find themselves with no excess of $2000 donated on behalf of MPM and its very impressive piece. baritone with a small string and proper shelter, lack of social support networks, and sponsors to Angel Tree, an organization that buys Another percussion piece, this wind ensemble accompaniment. suffering from poor self-esteem." Christmas gifts for needy children. one dedicated to Toronto artist Roger conducted hi§ work With the help of 24 volunteers and 2 paid staff, Pocket Weasel and Dark Out play both original Chester Brown, was "Be Happy which had beautiful duets be- ROOF "works throughout the week running groups, music and cover songs by the likes of George Every Day of Your Life", written tween soprano and baritone, as providing food, blankets, clothes, and toiletries, and Thorogood, the Doors, and Fleetwood Mac. The by Todd Cottrell. Rhythmically, well as impressive trios. Roger's providing over 40 hours of free counselling time to show begins at 8:00 pm.

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j — All meat cooked over Mesquite gjpPpiH jm 112 — Hickory smoked chicken and ribs t LLJ^J FASHION WEAR ! - Fresh ttour tortillas \ ISZI King In - Value Centre Kitchener, 743-8895 J| i Vegetarian menu K A J \ Featurinz: j ! <°WSr f_»s —__!_!_ -Esprit -Mexx -BHerman ' \ L He —I \ -Rifle -Unlimited the cord 22 SCENE Thursday November 15,1990 Changes going down at Theatre Laurier

he told Frank to "piss off and out flyers and put up posters. I highschools. We're doing a co- "I'll do the damn thing myself. look after the advertisements, get- sponsorship and lecture tour for Definitely grumpy. ting publicity, overseeing ad- highschools with Amnesty Inter- vanced ticket sales -basically I'm national. Guy: Are you related to Bobby a middle man that runs between The "Trojan Women" is a Orr? the director and the producer. I didactic play--its message is also book rehearsal rooms for the primarily anti-war and against the Todd: No, but once in a soft ball cast, inquire about obtaining the oppression of man by men. This tournament in Owen Sound when production rights and keep in allows us to hook up with Am- I was four or five years old I was touch with the community. Just nesty and to go and teach at the Bobby Orr's bat boy. recently I have also taken on the highschools the messages found job of Assistant Director and that in "Trojan Women" which are Guy: So, you're relatively new to has some other responsibilities. relevant today. this position... Guy: Are you trying anything dif- Guy: Has the play been changed Todd: I just started in September. ferent with Theatre Laurier this much so thai it is more entertain- In the past I worked as Assistant year-anything you haven't done ing because I'm wondering how a Director and before that I was an in the past? strictly didactic play will go over usher. with an audience? Todd: We're trying to expand by "Trojan Women", he is working Just what does a Production involving the community. Theatre by Guy Etherington Guy: Todd: Actually, we have made on. Frank Morningstar, that guy Manager do? Laurier is in a transition period some changes along with the ac- A stunning and introspective look from News, wanted to do this in- and we're trying to increase the tors. Also there's a surprise at the at Theatre Laurier's brand terview but, seeing as how Scene Todd: Well a Production Man- community's awareness of us. beginning. In the Leslie O'Dell spanking new Production Man- Editor Guy Etherington is very ager at Laurier does everything I'm involving stores like HMV tradition we are adding a section ager Todd Orr and the play, grumpy and spiteful these days, from design the budget to pass and Wordsworth Books and also that she has created. It is a new ii twist on the play and will allow a modern audience a transition pe- riod so they can understand some of the myths relevant to a Greek audience. Also, through improvisation with the cast, we are refining and rewriting the script. These im- provs are set in modern times in modern situations but with the original Greek characatures. One particular scene worked out so ...ij&jjjjßliijlllllllM well it followed the play's frame- work exactly.

• I think that all of this will al- .»- • « i IiiiHSHH 9 low the characters to become more rounded and dimensional as well as more universal and, there- fore, a lot easier to identify with. **■»- mBMBHPII:. MMm 'ili|P^ This should make the play more

' m ' *** C"* entertaining and interesting for the audience.

'' T ■ •. Guy: What is Theatre Laurier doing with "Trojan Women" that hasn't been done before and that reflects this transition you spoke BBf of earlier? ■,* \ i m Todd: For the first time we are creating a theatre within the theatre. We are doing the play in the round by creating a 40 x 60 foot box in the centre of the T.A lit# *'''#"- «jjj with curtains behind the audience. The audience is, in a sense, trapped in this court- garden. It's all based on actual ruins found in Troy.

Guy: Getting back to your jobfor a minute—are you also involved in getting volunteers for this pro- duction? Todd: Yes, I want to stress that Some ofCanada's best accounting minds there are a lot of volunteers in- volved in any production. Theatre are Laurier is built on volunteers. the insurance industry. ~ in Amnesty is lending a hand sell- some people for If you have an interest in accounting, why not consider Canada, you would join an educated, experienced ing tickets and we a career with Canada's property/casualty, or general and ethical group of professionals equipped to pursue actual leg work. In expanding, formation of insurance industry? In fact, the industry offers a wider successful careers at the local, provincial, national or are supporting the on variety of career choices than you ever imagined. even international level. an organization that will come and provide volunteers Accountants ves, but also systems analysts, lawyers, Choice, challenge, satisfaction and security. 1 hey campus community. managers, loss prevention engineers, investment are just some of the rewards you'll enjoy through a from the organization will appar- specialists, investigators, marine underwriters, aviation career in the property/casualty insurance industry. The ently be working to make sure adjusters and many more. The choice is yours. For more information, contact Les Dandridge, that staff, students, faculty and General insurance is also an industry that encourages 8.A., AIIC at The Insurance Institute of ( anada. highschool students can be in- to acquire its own levels of professionalism. 4cSl University Avenue, 6th floor, Toronto, Ontario you in performance related As a Fellow or Associate of The Insurance Institute of MSG 2F9 (4 16) 591-1572 Fax: (416) 591-1678. volved events. Most positions, such as actors, stage managers and their assistants, assistant director, costume assistants are non-paid Canada's Insurance Professionals positions. And we greatly ap- The Graduates of The Insurance Institute of Canada. preciate the help. the cord Thursday November 15,1990 SCENE 23 Cult of Jazz in a basement Continued from page 17 Michael Jackson of course that you're balmy. Imagine he's the chimp!" Oh BRILLIANT The interview breaks down It's like guys who somewhere around here when we What about movies? David wants to buy his bones. probably sitting around in his MICHAEL! the started to talking Lynch? I dunno know—l think Michael nice expensive living room with a write the Weekly World News. about Pat's Eraserhead well that's g00d... Jackson gets a bit of bad press. If couple of his buddies, having a They don't believe that stuff. sympathy for the Quebecois be- The Elephant Man is one of the you think about Michael blow and it's 1ike..."1 know what They're just taking a piss at it. cause both the Frenchies and the funniest movies he ever made. Jackson and it starts getting out we'll do. Let's tell em I talk to Canadian students have recent- JBC know what it's like to be ly been pelting our Prime Min- stormed. It has something to do ister with macaroni and other with being mistaken for terrorists by: pastas. Anything you'd like to on the Ml motorway in England PEAKS throw at Margaret Thatcher? and having their tour bus stopped F.B.I. Agent Uh yah. God it's kind of hard to at gunpoint by the SAS. A know where to start. I'm not ac- strange situation indeed. MARTIN WALKER tually very well up on this area of BEAT The evening's concert was a armaments but I suppose a stink little more structured with grenade of some sort. I mean for Bristol's newest sensations, The What an episode! If you were unfortunate enough Q) one practical purposes abuse would Was Leland the who killed Laura Pal- Blue Aeroplanes opening for the to have missed last Saturday's Twin Peaks episode, do for the time being. Not a nice mer? JBC and then getting the snot you probably missed one of the more strange and A) to Possibly not! If remem- woman at all. Impossible say. you beat out of them by the bouncers violent Twin Peaks episodes yet. said, he was just a spirit Would you play for the troops ber what one-armed Mike at Peter Clark Hall. that chose to stay in the body of Philip Gerard (the in Kuwait? You can rake up another murdered victim on the name of the "host" body). This could mean that the Pat and the band were on next old Twin Peaks murder roster. This week's victim: spirit of Bob was in someone else's body when Elephant Man: and the JBC had every artsie type Laura Palmer's cousin Madeline. The murderer: "Bob" killed Laura. It may be too early to tell...yet. in Guelph moistened with ecstacy "killer Bob". The true identity: none other than In other story lines... by evening's end. Fish doesn't Leland Palmer. WOW! While this is occurring, one funny movie have any strong affection for his Agent Cooper has another vision/dream at the 1) Home was arrested by Truman and Cooper for classic older material like "The Roadhouse. In it, the giant man tells him that, "It is the murder of Laura Palmer. They believed Ben Sure! Well the first night we Devil is My Friend" and other happpening again". This leads to several questions Home fit the description of the person that Mike played in Portland Oregon we did fantastic pieces from the album viewers may have. said was killer Bob. "Line of Death", with our Bloody Nonsense. He performed 2) As I predicted last week, Catherine Martell is in customary sense of timing we're almost everything from his soon Q) Was Madeline killed? fact the mysterious Mr. Tojomora. She revealed her playing "Line of Death" on this to be released album Cult of the A) Probably. She took quite a beating. She took identity to husband Pete "the poodle" Martell. tour. A chap comes in after... this Basement and the audience had to several blows to the face prior to having her head 3) Leo Johnson, the human vegetable, directed big burly fellow in a New Order literally beg for an encore con- rammed into the wall. Leland then implanted a let- Bobby Briggs to a pair of old boots, where Bobby t-shirt. He stands around for ages sisting of "Party Time" and the ter "D" under Madeline's fingernail. Don't ask me found a cassette tape hidden in the heal. while I'm talking to someone epic thrash anthem "Caroline what the "D" stands for. And that concludes a typical day in the life of the else. We get to talking and he Wheeler's birthday present". Q) What was the white horse that Leland's wife town of Twin Peaks. says "Caroline Wheeler's birthday envisioned prior to Madeline's death? "I just got back from Kuwait. present was made entirely from It is interesting to note that chronologically, A) I believe it was a vision of Laura Palmer's white Agent I'm in the navy." the skins of dead Jim Morrison's. Cooper has only been in Peaks for days! horse that Laura mentions in her secret diary. The Twin 14 Oh you've come to beat me up That's why it smells so bad." If My, a lot happens in this town. Until next horse was killed after Laura released the horse from week, have you? you want to know who Caroline captivity and it broke its leg. pour me another cup of black coffee. "Nope." Well that was a Wheeler was come up to the Cord relief. and I'll tell you all about it. * VALUABLE COUPON*

1 When to WWH time to

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Our 12", 8-slice medium pizza serves 2 to 3 persons. The Bookstore in the Concourse $ VALUABLE COUPON* Wilfrid Laurier University Student's Union /y< m yr\ cordially invites you to harjt^all9l 1 "The tradition begins..." January 19,1991 ®|L Waterloo Inn ■■ All proceeds go to Cocfails 6:3opm Jr\ K-W Access Ability Dinner served 7:3opm jf\ \ (a member agency of the United Way) featuring 11 (JsD ©KSS __ Ten Seconds over Tokyo (V) 2.2,23 C° (30 each The 40 th Annual

Pick up LOTTERY FORMS Nov. 12-19 at the INFO BOOTH u Winners will posted N0v.21 pick up tickets until N0v.26 ,'

BACCHUS TIP of the WEEK When someone passes out from drinking too much, it is not a funny scene. Put them on their side, with their arm above their head so they cannot choke on their vomit. Check on them frequently.

For more information on alcohol use and abuse, contact BACCHUS Services on the 2nd floor of the Student Union I Building. | Thursday November 15 1990 Brock Greennaigh, hcutor 25 SPORTS Hawkey Hawks in first place by Andrew Bailey ing early as Scott Driscoll blasted Cord Sports one past Stinger goaltender Scott Donaldson at 0:16 seconds. After After a heartbreaking 7-6 Concordia took a 2-1 lead Kevin overtime loss last Saturday, the Smith tied in on his fourth goal of Hawkey Hawks travelled to St the season popping it between Catherines to face off against the Donaldson's pads. Forty-four sec- previously unbeaten Brock onds later Peter Choma gave the Badgers. Golden Hawks the lead. Led by Mark McCreary's five Mike Maurice increased the point night, the Hawks thumped Hawk lead to two with his the Badgers 7-2, improving their seventh of the season at 2:28 of record to 3-2. the second session. With only The Hawks led 3-0 after the 1:46 left in the period Larry Ruc- first and 4-0 after the second. chin blasted one behind Donald- McCreary and Andrew Wood son for his first goal of the year both scored twice for the Golden making it 5-2. at 12:00 Stinger Hawks. Howdie Mickoski, Kevin Paul Brophy was ejected from the Smith and Mike Dahle were the game for his third stick infraction other Laurier marksmen. The win of the night, he also received an gave the Hawks six points, and automatic one game suspension. put them in first place by one Only twenty-four seconds into point over Western and Guelph. the third period Concordia pulled to within two on a Mark David- SATURDAY NOVEMBER son blast from the slot. But that 10TH VS. CONCORDIA was all for the Stingers as the After their convincing win stellar Hawk defense would allow over Brock, the Golden Hawks nothing more. Kevin Smith stole Question #2: Can this team follow the path of last year? returned to the Bubble on the the puck and netted his second of The Hawkey Hawks have won three straight and by amazingly high weekend to play host to the Con- the game and sixth of the season scores. Let's keep our fingers crossed. cordia Stingers. while the Hawks were The Hawks were without the shorthanded at 7:04 making it 6- services of center Dan Rintche 3. Laurier offense fired 34 shots at every game, he is going to be seventh goal of the season. After who will be out for eight weeks Sean Davidson scored at Concordia, while the defense al- much more flexible with the the Redmen tied it on a power after injuring his ankle during 10:29 while the Hawks were en- lowed only 18. Mike Matuszek goalies. play from the point, Mark Monday's practice. joying a two man advantage. was solid between the pipes for Gowing was very pleased McCreay made it 2-1 Hawks on The Hawks and Stingers pro- Dave Burke then scored his first Laurier. The potent Hawk offense with the Hawks effort and says the rebound with only forty-seven vided the fans with some great of the year at 14:54 putting the has scored twenty-seven goals in that the club is showing very pos- seconds left in the first period. physical hockey. "The guys knew finishing touches on an 8-3 Hawk their past four games alone. itive signs. He is impressed with Thirty seconds into the second they were in for a game," said rout. Meanwhile, the defense has been the very solid Laurier defensive Sean Davidson increased the lead Hawk coach Wayne Gowing, and Hawkey Hawk Kevin Smith stingy, giving up only fifteen. effort this year. "Good defense to 3-1 as he put it past McGill they sure had one. Nobody was name player of the game for Mike Matuszek continues to creates good offense," quoted netminder Scott Taylor. The backed out of a hit in this one. his outstanding efforts. Mike start between the posts for the Gowing, and this proved true for Hawks then exploded for four Every check was finished off, and Maurice once again played an ex- Hawks. However, coach Wayne the Hawks. more goals in the period includ- everyone seemed to be hitting. cellent game and continues to Gowing points out that unlike last ing three by Smith. opened The Hawks the scor- lead the club in scoring. The year when Rob Dopson started In the third, Smith scored SUNDAY NOVEMBER 11TH again only twenty-six seconds VS. MCGILL into it. Just over a minute laior After dismantling one Jon Buder made ii 9-1 Laurier. Montreal school, the Hawks wel- Not that it mattered, but the comed the McGill Redmen to the "Deadmen" pulled to within Bubble for a Sunday afternoon seven on a power play goal at DisappointmentLady contest. About 200 people who 8:04. decided to give up NFL football The Hawks had the week off Hawks for for the afternoon and brave the aches to heal their and pains after Sunday, November 11th. awe as the orb found the net. weather saw the Hawks improve two physical games. They meet Laurier 1, Acadia 2 (OT) Laurier's lead did not last as Acadia back came their record to 5-2, as the Hawkey the Windsor Lancers this Satur- via Satellite by Sally-Jo in similar fashion to tie the game. When both and Helen. op- Hawks eradicated the McGill day at the Bubble, game time is ponents went overtime, into Laurier almost ex- Redmen 9-2. 7:00 pm. Gowing was again For the second year in a row, the East shut hausted their personnel. Lisa Wannen, Debbie Cal- The game featured another pleased with the team's play, es- down the avenue towards the national final for the low, and Kelly "Kicker" Konstantinou nursed in- stand out performance by Kevin pecially the relatively soccer Hawks. This year, it left even more hearts credible injuries. Nonetheless, the Hawks dug deep, in- Smith and Mike Maurice. Smith experienced line of Alain Labelle, weeping, especially after the team overcame inter- emerged with a edge in the extra and clear 30 scored five times and added one Dave nal difficulties, the Ontario competition in the minutes, yet score Burke and Howdie Mick- the sheet remained void. The assist for a total of seven goals in oski. OWIAA tourney, and the formidable effort against penalty shot contest, a classic among Laurier's the two weekend games. Maurice The Hawks launched another the Acadia side. championship fashion, was unkind to them this contributed six assists to the assault firing 34 shots at the The match, despite being against the same op- time-around, leaving Acadia to emerge victorious Hawk effort, and was named McGill net. For the second ponent from last year does not deserve a place bes- and challenging for the CIAU title. player of the game. the ides last year's effort, it deserves a place much Even though this season was tainted with this straight night visitors changed With two games in less than netminders higher. The contest was an equal affair as both heart-breaking loss, the rest of the picture during the game be- is so twenty-four hours, Gowing de- teams leveled in all departments of quality soccer. beautiful that it deserves but cause of the explosive Laurier of- nothing praise. Their cided to start Murray Townsend Skill, intelligence, and intensity burst forth from all matches, their problems, and their victories burst fense. in net and give Matuszek the Everybody expected this to be 22 units, yet Laurier decorated the score board first. with such passion that the end of the season means afternoon off. It was only a rebuilding year for the Hawkey The opportunity, as golden as they come, was pre- void spaces in many hearts, including mine. For the Townsend's second start of the Hawks. However, everyone on sented to Helen Stoumbos in the first half. The team, that void space will hopefully be filled next year but he was solid stopping the team is contributing and the leather was placed outside the box for a free-kick, year. Until then, I can honestly say that this eighteen shots. team is showing great effort and with a professional touch, she put a total effort volunteer position has nothing a privilege. and been but The Golden Hawks opened even better results. It may be ear- behind it. The seams nearly burst, yet the ball held P.S. Thanks to my satellite staff, coach Syed the scoring at 7:18 as Kevin ly but the Hawks look ready to together unlike the Acadia defense who watched Mohamed, Sally-Jo Knight and Helen Stoumbos. in Smith poked it home for his bring home another OUAA tide. the cord 26 SPORTS Thursday November 15, 1990 Maple Leafs: no more GEM line by Craig Burt were excited about the future of the team. The team had an ex- Leeman, gambling that it would replace Olczyk. Doug Gilmour to Cord Sports cocky, aggressive, fast and ready cellent core of young players. It make him a more team player. the Flames for Wendel Clark may for the future. They could score appeared as though one goalie Leeman refused the pressure of have already happened by this Gary Leeman, Ed Olczyk and with almost any team in the and a pair of experienced wearing the A and a disappointed reading. Mark Osborne comprised last league. defensemen were all that was Brad Marsh refused to put it back The GEM line is gone. From year's GEM line. Together they First year coach Doug Car- needed. However, a funny thing on. now on it will only be the G?? scored more points than any line penter guided his squad to an happened on the way to the races. After a 1-9-1 start to the sea- line until new line mates are in recent Maple Leaf history. eighteen-point improvement and New team president Donald Gif- son, GM Floyd Smith relieved found for Leeman. This may be They were to be the foundation of many felt that he could take the fin and his High Council of the Carpenter of his coaching posi- some time in coming. Leeman a bright Maple Leaf future. Leafs a step further this year. Gardens turned out to be just a tion and replaced him with as- separated his shoulder this past Last season the Leafs won as For years, critics of the Leafs gang of Ballard cronies. sistant Tom Watt a few days Saturday and will be out for 4-6 many games as they lost. They pointed to mismanagement by Coach Doug Carpenter con- later. weeks. Expect another two weeks also added four ties as a bonus. owner Harold Ballard as the fused fans and players alike by Smith himself, decided that after he returns for him to They were a .500 hockey team. cause of all the problems. They moving 51-goal right-winger his best move was to sit back and rekindle an already cold scoring They finished in the middle of the stated repeatedly that the Leafs Gary Leeman to a center position rely upon his youngsters to pull touch. pack. They were average and for would not improve until Ballard for the first portion of training through this year, even though his Thus, the Leafs have changed. Leaf fans suffering through a either sold the team or died. Last camp. He also stripped assistant four rival General Managers in Everyone wanted change, right? decade of dreadful hockey, this April Mr. Ballard passed away. Brad Marsh of the A on his the Norris were re-arming them- With a 2-15-1 record something was great. The Leafs were young, After a period of mourning, fans sweater in a bid to give it to selves for the wars ahead with had to be done, didn't it? With quality players such as Scott Dave Ellett added to Tom Kur- Stevens, Chris Chelios, Brian vers, Rob Ramage and A 1 lafrate Propp, Brad McCrimmon and the power-play will improve, Sergei Fedorov. won't it? The pressure now ap- IHEY YOU: READ THIS i The team, as it turned out, pears to be on Vincent returned promising youngsters Damphousse, Daniel Marois and I I Rob Pearson and Drake newcomer Krushelnyski to prove I Okay, never say I don't give you anything. Here is your chance to go to Skydome on November 24th and j Berehowsky to junior, and then they are capable of being a new J watch the Vanier Cup. It's pretty simple. Turn to this week's quiz on page 30 and answer the questions demoted Joe Sacco, Mike Millar one line. find there. You can put the answers the below and drop this whole thing off at The | that you in spaces and Steve Bancroft to the minors. The irony is that "Mr. Young- and Monday 19th 5:00 If I'm (the I Cord offices between today November at pm. not around Sports l What was left in Toronto was not sters" Floyd Smith, has trans- 1 I Editor) just drop it off in my mail box, and no you can't peek at the other answers. All correct answers competitive enough to win. formed the Leafs from a bunch of I will be put in one of my touques from home and I'll pick the winner at random. The winner of the contest j After the new coach failed to kids into a veteran team in one will be by telephone his or her name will appear in big bold letters in next week's , j contacted that day and spark any kind of turnaround, and weekend. Perhaps he was think- The Cord. You two tickets to Skydome. This DOES NOT include your way there or | edition of will win under pressure to make moves by ing of the Boston Bruins who Big restaruant a to I back, or any Macs from the there. What it does include is chance look around I Giffin, Smith unveiled his went to the Cup Final last year and maybe get on Jumbotron. contest is I Skydome, watch the Vanier Cup your face plastered the This I "master plan". To date, (Sunday) with key, older players like Ray to Laurier University. So take this opportunity to spend a Saturday in I open all students of Wilfrid this has meant trading John Bourque, Brian Propp, Dave [ Toronto, maybe I'll can have a $5.00 soda and some wrinkly hot dogs. and hey, join you. We Mclntyre, Mark Osborne and Ed Poulin, Andy Moog and Gary I I Olczyk in order to acquire Mike Galley. If he had come to this I ANSWERS: I Krushelnyski, Dave Ellett and conclusion in the summer, how- I 1. 4. 7. NAME: Paul Fenton. Some suggest this ever, he probably would have had I | plan will not be finished until the greater value from his players j 2. 5. 8. - ID#: Leafs acquire one more center to after last season. I I 3. 6. ? PHONE#: I ! _ i

i 1 Schmeck's Appeal nipissing universfty college « Cookbook Series ,or of Education < Good Christmas Giving) Bachelor , SB frffi Wednesday, November 21 The B.Ed. Degree program at HHL 9 Nipissing is a one-year limited ' 'fjJfl enrolment program taught at the of Noon Primary/Junior and the Junior/ Intermediate levels. tatfS3s COPICOUrSG Our small class size \ TC Autographing students ensures^personal A attention from professors. Our Edna Staebler practice teaching policy allows you Waterloo to choose the location of most of V Wp 3 W your practice teaching. WdtCflOO" 1 /112 m; Jf:

"" "Education ofNative Children", An Illustrated History Ij g ***■"112 "Second Language Teaching: (Lecture includes WLU'S I j|* French" or ro je in the community.) k Religious t

And we have a generous entrance at Noon well Teach scholarship program as as tho Tiirrot North Awards. For more information in In 6 I Uriel MM

Nipissing Refreshments Provided Kenneth McLaughlin KB ® Ss ~ St. Jerome s College University Collegelf

Affiliated with Laurentian University Ha ■ ■i ffl _ 100 CollegeDrive, Box 5002, North Bjy, Ontario PIB BL7 (705) 474-3450 WLIJ 1990-91 Tenth Annual Meet the Author Series II" II g asl Sponsored by WLU Bookstore in the Concourse the cord Thursday November 15, J990 SPORTS 27 Women's Volleyball takes on Lakehead

and once again the Lady Hawks Due to a slight conflict with were victorious, in three straight. several midterms last week, there Paula Baker and Tammy Riley was no article about the women's were voted as the Most Valuahle volleyball team. I will have to up- Players and Laura Cooke was date all of the avid fans on the named the MVP of the entire past four games and of course, tournament. the tournament. The week following the On Halloween the Windsor tournament, the Lady Hawks Lancers travelled to Laurier. Un- were at Waterloo, in a match fortunately, their three hour drive against the Athenas. Despite a ended in despair, as Laurier beat slow start and a loss in the first them in three straight games. The game, Laurier managed to Hawks played their own brand of regroup and win the next three powerful volleyball against the games 15-12,15-9 and 15-11. Lancers. This game saw some unusual On November 3rd and 4th the play by Laurier's Tammy Riley Lady Hawks opened up the who headed the ball on a service Athletic Complex for a tourna- reception and kept the rally alive, ment. Teams travelled from eventually taking the point. Over- Windsor, Queen's and just up the all, the team showed some con- street to compete. In round robin sistency in their play. The team played their most exciting game this weekend. photo by Chico play, Laurier won all of their Our coverage ends with a split narrowly lost 16-14. They came Lady Hawks had difficulty in only proved the fact that Laurier matches and ended up first in of two matches against Lakehead with some solid play arid returning what she handed them. could dominate, but also showed their pool. on November 9th and 10th. were able to capture the second that Lakehead could not deal with semi-finals, Saturday's match was amaz- In the Laurier Lakehead flew down out of the gar.ie, but seemed to lack in- a lack of communication and ing, and probably the best so far faced off against the cross town great white north, with the ex- tensity and fell to Lakehead in the frustration between the players for the Lady Hawks. The team rivals, Waterloo, defeating the pectations of making it an easy third and fourth games. and the coach. started out at the wrong end of a Athenas in four games. The finals weekend in Waterloo, due to their The team from Lakehead was The Wilfrid Laurier Golden 12-15 game, due to a few missed proved to be the most exciting, outstanding play last season. Fri- headed by an outstanding player Hawks now stand at 3-1 and have serves, but Laurier soon rallied. despite the lack of fan support. day's match started out well for with a fantastic serve and an a great base for the rest of the After successfully mastering the Laurier was up against Queen's the Lady Hawks, but the team equally season. The coach, Cookie Leach destructive spike and the in shutting down defense is excited and knows that the most Lakehead's prolific player, tremendous skill of her players was to turn things Laurier able and the team-oriented per- around and mark up a victory. formance shown this past Satur- HAWKSTHEOFWEEK The final score of 15-6 not day can only be improved upon.

KEVIN SMITH (HOCKEY)- The 4th year player from Hagersville was in- strumental in the success of the Haw- |||||^^ key Hawks this weekend. He regis- tered 5 goals, 1 assist against McGill on Saturday, and 2 goals, 1 assist against Concordia on Sunday.

(VOLLEYBALL)- mm LAURA COOKE The 3rd year student from Burlington had an outstanding weekend against ill! Lakehead. Her 31 kills, 6 aces and 13 stuff blocks and strong leadership were instrumental in the team's win on Saturday. Sl SHOOTERS J®, fP§f Laff Inn Comedy Night * Tuesday, Nov Bth FREE with Laurier Student I.D. BEACH BLANKET BINGO PARTY! 5c Wings from 7-9 pm PLAY BINGO TO WIN BIG PRIZES WEAR YOUR BEACH CLOTHES & DANCE ON A REAL SAND FLOOR! ' / \ | Ji;, | 1 SOON HUDDLING COLD. YOU ARE PERMITTED TO JUMP UP AND - MEANS YOU'LL BE IN THE IGANprtMOLSON DOWN, BUI DO TRY TO CONCENTRATE ON THE BIG GAME DESPITE THE NUMEROUS DISTRACTIONS. : ft; v I M'-

COMMIT THE SCORE TO MEMORY (AS IF SOMEONE WOULD ASK). RAH RAH...Y EAH YEAH. 1 i-A-:?:?:-:-: tt::.-:;f;:fi'. '341 H- $:s:£*s!

Then there is the exhaustive analysis which takes place AFTER the Big Game.

WHEN SOMEONE ASKS ABOUT THE FINAL SCORE. TYPICAL FROSH. SO VERY KEEN.

— ■ m • WHAT BEER'S ALL ABOUT ■ I W^^ff the cord Thursday November 15,1990 SPORTS 29 Naismith Classic teaches lessons

by Rob Cresswell down the road at U of W. It was recently. That is not the point of Cord Sports their homecoming, and with it this article, however. What I saw comes the 23rd Annual Naismith at Waterloo this weekend really Another weekend passes and Basketball Classic. The Naismith opened my eyes toward Laurier with the leaves almost gone, it is one of the largest and most Athletics. Wilfrid Laurier is can't be long until another hor- prestigious basketball tourney's known for its small school en- rible Waterloo winter is upon us. in the country. Yes, Laurier was vironment and fine athletic pro- Two weeks have gone by since there, and yes, they didn't do very gram, mostly football and hock- the big Western game and with it well. There is no shame in losing ey. our school spirit for another year. to probably the number one team When you think of U of W, Call me crazy but that is what it in the nation and a strong what comes to mind? Perhaps a seems like. Laurentian squad. losing team. There is no consider- Last weekend, however, The games were competitive but ation for their athletic programs. wasn't just another weekend our shooting has gone cold Well guess what Laurier? Those engineers and science majors have more athletic spirit than this school certainly does. The Naismith Classic pro- No, this is not a Laurier crowd, it's Waterloo. vides a rallying point for Water- photo by Chico loo fans to change their interests from football to the now present its music program? Surely we can strongly. Why weren't you at basketball and volleyball seasons. round up some drums and horns Western two weeks ago? It is Waterloo coach Don McCrae for our athletic events. only an hour and yes, there were tends to stack the tournament to Residence floors gathered be- fan buses running. How many of show off his team before a hind the Winnipeg bench were you brag about our Ontario packed house every year. borderline obnoxious. They tor- women's soccer champions, Saturday night saw the War- mented the players with so much without even having watched a riors match up against the Uni- noise that timeouts were held at game or knowing who is on the JOCKSHORTS versity of Winnipeg, a team centre court because the players team? Will the hockey team lose Laurier had defeated one week couldn't hear the coach. Win- support because chances of a na- earlier. I thought I'd check it out nipeg free throws also bring a lot tional championship are not with a buddy from U of W as he of screaming and shouting in the good? FRIDAY NOVEMBER 16 said it was "big time fun." hopes of giving the advantage to This is not meant to be a neg- What I saw was somewhat in- the Warrior squad. With all this ative article, only an eye opener. BASKETBALL (WOMEN)- The team travels to credible for an Ontario university. enthusiasm I almost found myself Think about what has been writ- I realize that it was homecoming cheering for Water!oo.(NOT!!) McMaster to take part in the Winter Rose Classic. ten. How many other ways are but I saw few older faces and I'm Unlike Laurier, Waterloo sup- there to show school spirit than told it's like that for most league ports their teams through thick sporting events? Go down to the VOLLEYBALL (MEN)- The men will be going all games. With a couple thousand in and thin, win or lose. Football A.C. and pick up a blue schedule the stands the place was packed. received a great deal of support under the stairs and find out when the way out to Manitoba to take on the University of of This sort thing only happens at even though they were pathetic a Laurier plays their home games, Winnipeg. Don't mind the jet lag. frosh Laurier during week. few years back. Their basketball for every sport. A full house is crowd at The U of W goes crazy team is mediocre this year and we good for a few points a game, and BASKETBALL (MEN)- Sudbury is the next stop during player introductions and should easily defeat them. But referees fear for their lives if they the noise made is so loud until the for the men's basketball team, as they square off their fans will always be there for make a bad call. An out-of- first Waterloo score that it is al- them. There is no "jumping on control crowd makes a fun time. against Laurentian. most deafening. The cheerleaders the bandwagon" at U of W, its a Get out there and be loud next actually get some crowd feedback full year process. Laurier football time we have a home game. If and there is a band at sport- every fans only got interested late in the everybody does it you won't be ing event. Isn't Laurier known for SATURDAY NOVEMBER 17 year when they finished so missing anything.

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— " We Deliver - 894-1515 ■ ■ ovgr #5.00 ■ ■ ■ !■ J the cord Thursday November 15,1990 SPORTS 31 My Sunday evening... morning, let alone read through a making sure that I get out and ao by Brock Greenhalgh now. A lot of people have been know I have been telling my of "My Sunday some sort of activity throughout Sports Editor wondering where "Scoreboard" cohorts that I will get it working, whole article they Evening". So 1 guarantee that the week. I would like to be more Hi, I'm back. No, I wasn't has gone to. Well, it's still alive and I don't think that believe I that Scoreboard be in next issue. active, however. squandering my OSAP money on and kicking, I just have to get off me anymore. had hoped will in some of the scores are wrong I have also made an effort another trip to Las Vegas, it's just my lazy butt and learn how the since it wasn't the paper, If have to read the ar- and you notice it, let me know so (not wholeheartedly as of yet) to that I've had quite a lot of stuff to program works. people would to I have I can improve. Now that's off my get up earlier in the morning. So put in the pages of the Sports sec- Is there anyone out there in ticles find the scores. realize, however, in conscience, let me get to the busi- far that has amounted to getting tion these past few weeks. And newspaper land that knows how come to that of higher ness at hand, my Sunday exploits. up and going across my room to being the nice that guy I am, I de- the thing works? If so, come up this fast-paced world don't Well, for the past few weeks, turn off my alarm (which is right cided that I would dedicate that and stop the pain I am suffering. learning we students even instant I've been spending my Sunday below my Snoopy night-light). I space to sports. That's one of the If nobody shows up I guess I'll have time to sip our coffee evenings nursing the wounds I had hoped that by rearranging my things that I want to talk about have to do it myself (sigh). I or nibble on our "pop tarts" in the have incurred from afternoons of room and putting my clock on the touch football behind Willison other side of the room I would be Hall. If you've ever walked by awake enough after crossing the make for the the field I'm the guy that is al- great divide to V-ball Hawks fall to Warriors shower. As of yet, it has not hap- Men's breath, ways out of jogging, rath- er than running after my op- pened. Sleep for me is one of the ponents. The snow that has been joys of living, apart from writing falling has added to the excite- this column and I'm finding it ment of the games I play with my hard to break away from it. room-mates and other friends on So if you are in the same boat those Sundays, and I hope this as me, don't despair, just get out tradition will continue. It gives there and do something. If you me a chance to get some exercise are free on Sunday afternoons, and forget about my essays for a just come on by the practice field. while. Don't be intimidated Vy the Being active at university people you see there. I'm usually should not be limited to just those playing quarterback, so come and people on the varsity squads. talk to me. I'll let you join. From my past two years at Just a note. If you have Laurier I have come to realize skipped over all the rest of this that I always weigh more at the paper to read the article, turn end of my eight months than I do back. I have a contest for all stu- at the beginning (much like being dents of Laurier and you might be I a the winner. Read the ad on page photo by Eda DiLiso pregnant I guess). have The team has to maintain its confidence. tendency to be less active and 26 and then answer the questions therefore the pounds add up. I on page 30. I'll be there, and so change should you. serving and blocking bad," com- have made a this year by by Chris Dodd but our were mented Davis. Cord Sports The Hawks were in no way out-classed or over- powered but they did seem to lack the confidence in the echelon of The Wilfrid Laurier Golden Hawks men's vol- necessary to beat the teams upper seem to to get a leyball squad certainly didn't have to wait long for the OUAA west. The Hawks need more matches under their belt in order to their true test of the season. After drubbing an in- few remedy this problem. It's only a matter of time until ferior Windsor squad on Halloween, Coach Smith's CfcKl OneWaydjQ^JQ begins to beat the boys made the short jaunt down University Avenue the team realizes its potential and from OJ/ to the PAC, what the defending OUAA champs, the strong teams in the league. next might op- Waterloo Warriors call home. The team went with a The few games offer the very optimistic outlook but ended up on the wrong portunities that the Hawks are looking for. Andrew and lost 3-1 Reed, Greg Tennyson. Andy Fenton and Paul Ab- =$389 end of a 6-15, 9-15, 15-6, 10-15 score, dool must come up with solid performances in or- to the always tough Warriors. Plus bargain airfares der to beat teams such as Western. A big win in die to The guys came out and didn't appear to have AMSTERDAM, PARIS, ROME, ATHENS, TEL AVIV, didn't play next few games could go a long way in instilling the same zip as against Windsor. "We and many other European cities! all that well in the first two games," commented some confidence on this talent-laden squad. new to the volleyball season is Assistant Coach Steve Davis, "we certainly didn't A twist Hawks' Price varies with departure and return dates. Seats are limited and conditions apply. Departure $19 play as well as we are capable." the addition of a player of the game award some tax of not included The Hawks came out and got down early, and sponsored by Stingers. The first two games saw TRAVEL CUTS an as Waterloo, that Greg Tennyson and Dave Gallagher receive the against unforgiving squad such University Shops Plaza can spell doom. "We can't afford to get down ear- honour. ly" remarked Davis, "The guys didn't feel confi- The loss to Waterloo saw the Hawks record 170 University Ave W. Waterloo, N2L 3E9 dent." drop to an even 1-1 and the Hawks will be looking (519) 886-0400 Andrew Reed again led the way for the Hawks to improve on that and to prove to themselves and with 13 kills and 3 stuff blocks. Dave Gallagher the rest of the OUAA west that they are a force and r^TRAVELCUIS also played a solid game with 12 kills, 3 service will be there when it comes time to crown the aces and 2 stuff blocks. "Defensively we were solid Champs. — mi GoingYburWay!

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