Now that it’s mind-numbingly anger-induc- years ago. Leave them alone. A snow shovel ingly freezing outside, it seems appropriate made of plastic is a disgrace and if you use to make a few winter-related observations. one, you are less than a real man. Or woman, as the case may be. I know the new shovels First, shouldn’t salt melt snow? I thought so. But may be back-savers. But if you’re having back so far it seems like I might as well be sprinkling problems, you shouldn’t be shoveling any- more snow on top of the snow. Then again, way. Besides, that’s why people have kids isn’t some of this stuff you really can’t call snow at it? It sure ain’t for the tax write-off. And if you all. That first round of ice was a killer. First we don’t have kids, you likely have expendable can’t shovel at all because nature has squeezed income. So you can rent the neighbor’s kids. a layer of magic shell over the earth. And ever since, I’m able to clear the subsequent snow Moving on. with a kitchen broom. That’s not right. The city even gave us an extra week to get our walks We take pride in living in the frozen tundra. cleared after that first slap in the face from We start wearing shorts in February as soon mother nature. Oh, and, of course, after I write as it hits 45 degrees. We see two feet of snow this the sky opens up and unleashes more fro- and jump in the car to go to the movies with- zen fury on us. No one can shovel this stuff! out fear. But some people still don’t get winter driving. Is it amnesia? New residents? Or is it Who is responsible for the new era of snow just chronic dumbness? I guess there is also a shovels? They have made them feather-light, contingent of people who are sure that they are ergonomically superior to everything that Highlanders and can’t be killed by convention- came before and, of course, practically worth- al weapons. I drive a four-wheel-drive SUV and less when you need to put a little muscle into I know my limits. When I see rear wheel drive the job. Have you tried to shovel the ice that cars not just pass me, but go flying by me on fell last week with your 10-ounce Rube Gold- Dodge on snow-covered roads, I have to admit berg, Frankenstein snow shovel? No dice. I sort of wish they’d bite it while I could see it Not even close. The snow looked at my brand happen just so I can witness the fruition of their new shovel and laughed in my face, which stupidity. People spinning tires, doing 360s in was especially rude because the salt was do- intersections, and sliding into red lights. Is this ing such a stellar job of getting things started. seriously your first snowstorm people? I guess Not. Melts to -5 degrees my foot. there are a few Floridians in town who are wondering what kind of frozen hell they have What the snow didn’t know was that I had a chosen to call home. And there’s always a con- secret weapon. In the basement of my 150-year- tingent of indestructible high school kids who old house, next to my person-powered ancient are indeed driving through their first ice storm lawn mower, leaning up against my unexplain- with the same reckless abandon they displayed ably pink coal bin, still filled with coal, is the when they first got into their $500 car with the ol’ Billy Baroo, as Ted Knight would call him: $5000 stereo. But that’s still only a few people. A 15-pound heavy steel snow shovel devoid of So what is the excuse for the rest? Did that many any style, covered in rust and mangled at the people really fail physics? Oh, wait. They prob- edges. The handle is simple and wooden, not ably never took physics. But, a cursory viewing feng-shui crooked and wrapped in comfort foam of Donald Duck in Mathmagicland (It’s on You- grips like the fancy new kid is. This is a butt-ugly Tube) should give you the basic knowledge not old-school show shovel. And, like Jim Plunkett to out-drive the laws of centrifugal force and and Vinny Testaverde, it is back in the game. I’ve Newton’s three laws of motion. benched the new guy and old reliable is once again sitting with pride inside the front door of They do try to keep us off the roads when the house. When I’m not cleanly and joyously weather is bad and it’s probably a great idea. scraping ice clear from the concrete, I’m swing- Because chances are it’s not going to be you ing this sucker like Conan the Barbarian wield- getting yourself into a bind, but that guy in ing a battle axe, chopping away with the curved the ‘82 Monte Carlo who fancies himself a metal edge at the thick ice that thought it was drift-racer who’s going to wrap you around his here to stay for the season. Sorry Ice, no dice. bumper. Despite him (or her) being the moron in this situation, you’re likely driving a new The moral of the story is, sometimes tech- car, made mostly of lightweight alloys and nology has already found the best answer plastic and they are driving the 30-year-old to the problem. Go fix cancer; snow shovels iron and steel road-locomotive made out of, achieved their maximum versatility about 40 well, probably made out of old snow shovels. The 365ink crew... faces you already know!

Tim Brechlin Mike Ironside Tanya Tjarks Jeff Stiles Kelli Kerrigan Ralph Kluseman Gary Olsen Matt Booth L.A. Hammer Chris Wand Pam Kress-Dunn Joey Wallis ISSUE # 45 In this Issue of 365ink... DECEMBER 13 - 26 The Mississippi Moon: 4 Dubuque Healing Arts: 6

Library Fundraisers: 8 The Slade Family Singers: 10

New Year’s Eve: 11 Grand New Year - Fun for Families: 12

Pam Kress-Dunn: 13 Concerts, Five Flags Events and Recurring Nightlife: 14

Mayor Roy Buol: 16 Budweiser True Music: 18-19 Community Shorts: 20

German Drinking Adventure: 21 Mattitude: 22 Eating Healthy: 23

Life Stiles: 24 The A Factor: 26 Wando’s Movies: 29

Bob’s Book Reviews: 30 Crossword / Sudoku: 31

Trixie Kitsch: 32 Dr. Skrap’s Horoscopes: 32 Comedy: 34

The Inkwell ) [email protected]) Publisher: Bryce [email protected] ( ) 563-451-9365 Tim Brechlin ( [email protected]) Editor: Kelli Kerrigan ( Advertising: [email protected] Tanya Tjarks ( Ad Design: : Mike Ironside, Joey Wallis, Ron TIgges, Bryce Parks Photography Mike Ironside, Tim Brechlin, Ellen Goodmann, Writers & Content: Bryce Parks, L.A. Hammer, Chris Wand, Mayor Roy Buol, Matt Booth, - Robert Gelms, Angela Koppes, Bryce Pam Parks, Kress-Dunn, Mike Ironside, and JeffTim Stiles Brechlin Graphic Design & Layout: Bob & Fran Parks, Kay Kluseman, Bob Johnson, Todd Lo Special thank you to: cher, Dave Blake, Everett Buckardt, Julie Steffen, Sheila Castaneda, Tom Miller, Christy Monk, Katy Brechlin, Jim Heckmann, Ron & Jennifer, TiggesIA, 52001 and all the 365 friends and advertisers for all your support., Dubuque You are all 365. West 1st Street (563) 588-4365 Dubuque365 • 210 Office Phone or Music/Events/Movie Hotline 365 @ All contents (c) 2007, Community, Incorporated. All rights reserved.

We’ve hidden 365’s WANDO somewhere in this issue of Dubuque365ink. Can you find the master of movies buried within these pages? Hint: He’s tiny and could be anywhere ! Good Luck! Win- ners get a free warm fuzzy feeling in your belly! Roy Buol Ron Tigges Robert Gelms Brad Parks Angela Koppes Bryce Parks MISSISIPPI MOONLIGHT... 4 DEC 13 - 26

service for live music. It’s a dedicated live music theater that will be an attrac- tion in and of itself.”

Working with the Doobie Brothers, the Diamond Jo has licensed the rights to the band’s 1975 number 1 hit “Black Water.” In addition to providing a name and theme that seems tailor-made for an entertainment establishment at the Port of Dubuque, the Doobie Brothers will perform at the theater (possibly the venue’s debut performance) and act as a conduit for a variety of other national touring acts through their exten- sive entertainment industry contacts.

The Diamond Jo management began working with the classic rock band after its headline performance before about 9,000 fans at the America’s River Festi- val in June. “The Doobie Brothers are a group that is timeless,” explains Moyer. “It really came out when they were in town. There was a wide range of age groups represented (at the concert).” Only a couple months into his new posi- tion as Diamond Jo GM at the time, Moy- er was amazed and excited by the po- by Mike Ironside meets Hard Rock Café,” the venue will The second floor mezzanine will have have three levels with booths, tables, theater-style seating for 120 and a sec- The Dubuque live music and a signature bar on the first floor, and ond bar. The third floor will incorporate scene is about to be theater seating on the second and third two plush VIP suites, the Red Velvet and levels, all with a direct line of site to the Blue Suede suites, available for private turbocharged. stage. “It’s a music venue first,” states Di- parties. Overall, the décor will have a amond Jo Casino general manager Todd rich, warm feeling, reminiscent of a clas- It’s no surprise to people who live in the Moyer. “It will be built with music in sic music theater, but with all the state- area that Dubuque is becoming a city mind to maximize the acoustics and the of-the-art acoustics, PA, and lighting of a with a variety of live music and entertain- music experience for the audience.” modern live music venue. “We’re build- ment opportunities. Between the wide ing an entertainment facility,” explains range of festivals at the Town Clock and Designed to accommodate about 700 fans Moyer. “It’s not a ballroom or tradeshow Port of Dubuque, concerts at Five Flags, for larger shows, the space promises an or exhibition room that’s pressed into Eagle Point Park, and the Arboretum, and intimate experience for entertain- the variety of nightspots offering live mu- ers and fans alike. “This will be a sic year-round, Dubuque live music fans destination for performers,” said have more options than ever before to Moyer. “They are going to want to see and hear an array styles and perform- play here. It will probably be one ers. There is a reason why “Nightlife” and of the most intimate venues some “Entertainment” are the two most popu- acts will play, and because of that lar categories on the Dubuque365.com we will draw bands that might nev- Web site. er consider playing in a market this size.” That’s the good news. The even better news is that by about this time next year, In front of the full stage will be a a new entertainment venue will open dance floor area, which would that will put Dubuque on the map as a be open to general admission live music destination. tickets for larger concert events. Rising up behind the floor will Ladies and gentlemen, allow us to intro- be a semicircular row of booths duce the new Diamond Jo Casino’s Mis- having a clear line of site to the sissippi Moon Bar. stage. Stepping up another level will be a row of tables adjacent to Named for a key lyric of the Doobie the full-service Mississippi Moon Brothers’ hit, “Black Water,” the Mis- Bar. The first floor will also have sissippi Moon Bar will not only be one its own gaming area adjacent to of the coolest nightspots in the area, the bar but within earshot of the Attention to detail. The Diamond Jo has a whole room full of swatch designls like this one but will also be a state-of-the-art music stage. showing how every venue, every room of the new facility is painstakingly planned with design fea- theater. Described as a “House of Blues tures down to the last throw pillow and table lamp. It was daunting just browsing the designs. WILL THE TREE BAR BE MADE OUT OF TREES? 5 DEC 13 - 26

no; a swanky retro-styled bowling alley, Cherry Lanes; a separate VIP bowling al- ley for private parties, Alley Cat Lanes; two signature bars, Tree Bar, made from reclaimed wood, and Mojo’s Sports Bar; and a number of restaurants, including the signature eatery Woodfire Grille.

tential for big name entertainment at the enjoy hanging out and they fit right in to entertainers in the business. In his work Port. “I couldn’t believe this (America’s our bustling river town. in Atlantic City and Las Vegas casinos, River) event was here in Dubuque on our “We traveled this country far and Moyer has worked with well-known property,” he said. Moyer laughed about wide ... and some of our fondest national performers like Sammy how each song the Doobie Brothers memories are from our gigs in the Hagar, Kid Rock, Live, Stone Tem- played elicited a similar comment from heartland ... up and ple Pilots and San- Peninsula Gaming chief operating officer down the mighty tana, just to name Jonathan Swain: “That’s the best song … Mississippi,” said a few. no, wait, that’s the best song!” Moyer mentions that “We are excited to leave it’s worthwhile to note It was probably a our mark in Dubuque and Doobie Brothers that, as COO of Peninsula Gaming, common theme look forward to being one founding member Swain closed the corporate office in Las With live music or comedy every Thurs- among the thou- of the first acts to play in Patrick Simmons in a day through Saturday and some Sundays, sands of fans at this exciting new venue.” released statement. Moyer expects to host at least 150 nights the concert as the “We are excited to of live entertainment a year at Mississippi band rolled out leave our mark in Moon. While it’s still too early to release one hit song after another. After the show, Dubuque and look forward to being one names of any particular acts (the project the 365 crew showed a few of the band of the first acts to play in this exciting new is scheduled to be complete sometime members around town, catching a bit of venue.” in late fall of 2008) the Doobie Broth- the nightlife and visiting some classic Tri- ers’ participation and performance are a State landmarks including late-night ch- Moyer and Swain are clearly excited by good indicator of the level of entertain- ilidogs at Mulgrew’s in East Dubuque. It the potential for the project and are no ment that will be on the calendar. turns out they are just regular guys who strangers to working with some of the top

Vegas and moved it to Dubuque. The move speaks to the confidence Swain and the corporation have in the poten- tial of the Dubuque market, a move echoed by the substantial investment The band’s broad-based appeal provides in the expansive Diamond Jo entertain- another clue: “I’ve noticed there’s more ment complex and the Mississippi Moon of a varied interest in live music here in Bar. In addition to the new bar/theater, terms of the age of the audience,” Moyer the project includes an expanded casi- Continued on page 33 WILL REIKI FIX A CRANKY BACK? 6 DEC 13 - 26

After sitting down to talk with massage After seeing the potential of the house, therapist and Dubuque Healing Arts her first idea was to use the first floor for Group founder Elisa Eigenberger, the im- her massage studio and rent out the up- portance of the house in the generation stairs as apartments. To split up the space of the project came into sharper focus. she would have had to cut the historic She describes finding the Bluff Street 1880s house into private sections, but house that serves as the Group’s home didn’t really want to do that. Wanting to as “Divine intervention.” “It wasn’t my find a way to make it work, she woke up plan,” she admits. “It just happened.” one night in the middle of the night with the idea to rent out space to other like- Working as a registered nurse for 15 minded practitioners. Apparently her years, Eigenberger began yoga as a form husband did not share her enthusiasm of relief from the stress of working in for the idea at that very moment. Nev- healthcare. Getting deeper into yoga ertheless, she quickly found others who practice, she pushed herself to the point shared her vision through connections in where she sometimes needed massage the holistic healthcare community, their therapy to relax overworked muscles. friends and associates, and by word of Her experience led to an interest in mouth. massage that eventually led to intensive by Mike Ironside space in a beautiful old house just classes at Carlson College of Massage Eigenberger took possession of the build- across from Washington Park. While Therapy in Stone City, Iowa, and later ing on July 31 and moved in August 1. With a chiropractor and two massage the façade was remodeled in the ear- classes in Thai-style massage. In great need of some serious cleaning, therapists in the building, I had to tease ly 20th century, once inside one can painting, and renovation, she set to work them that all the recent snow and the re- feel the comforting warmth of a clas- Looking for a place to open her own on the house with the help of her hus- peated shoveling that goes along with it sic 19th century Victorian. The physi- practice, Eigenberger was driving around band, nephew, and sister. She saved was good for business. Actually, winter cal space imparts more to the project downtown with her husband in search money by making the renovations a storm warning or not, the services of- than you might at first think. Not only of a potential location. They noticed “family affair” and continued to do mas- fered by Bluff Street’s Dubuque Healing is the house suitably arranged to pro- the Bluff Street building was for sale and sage on the side to invest in the project. Arts Group are good for everyone. Self- vide a number of rooms in a range of called the realtor. He told them to wait “My massage practice saved my butt fi- described as “a collective community sizes perfect for everything from a sin- right there, as he could be there in five nancially a number of times,” she jokes. of independent practitioners, teachers, gle massage table to a broad wooden minutes to show them the building. and healers,” the Dubuque Healing Arts floor for yoga, but the quiet, familiar Once the house was in shape, the rest Group gathers a number of like-minded and cozy atmosphere lends itself well individuals offering their complementary to the Group’s nine practitioners and destination? practices under one roof. their complementary disciplines. Once I had been there, I just can’t imagine 6. What is the name of the calendar year Located at 679 Bluff Street, the the group operating in the cold auster- Answers on page 32 that ends on December 31? Dubuque Healing Arts Group shares ity of a clinical environment. 1. Current Doobie Brothers drummer A) Calabrian Ed Toth drummed for what alternative B) Gregorian group that was big in the late ‘90s? C) Julian D) Zoroastrian A) LFO B) Collective Soul 7. What percentage of personal spend- C) Matchbox Twenty ing (in the U.S.) takes place during the D) Vertical Horizon holiday shopping season?

2. The practice of Reiki dates back to A) 15% when? B) 35% C) 50% A) 1922 D) 25% B) 1663 C) Ancient Chinese times 8) How heavy is the Times Square New D) 1000 A.D. Year’s Eve ball?

3. Nick Klenske writes about gluhwein in A) 554 pounds this issue. What does that word mean? B) 1,070 pounds C) 180 pounds A) Boiled wine D) 1 billion pounds B) Cooked wine C) Glowing wine 9) The Fireside Grille will be the sig- D) Burnt wine nature restaurant of the new Diamond Jo. Name the three existing restaurants. 4. What is the name of the trilogy that Go! the movie The Golden Compass comes from? 10) True or False: According to VISA, Black Friday is the busiest shopping day 5. Actor Steve Martin’s career began as of the calendar year. a magician at what popular vacation WHAT MAKES THE DUDE MAGNIFICENT? FIND OUT NEXT ISSUE! 7 DEC 13 - 26

began to fall into place. The business plan she learned the Southern Method from the is simple. Each individual practitioner or Bangkok school (Wat Pho and Wat Buddhai business rents his or her own space. They Sawan), the Northern Method incorporat- pay no percentage of their profits back ing techniques from Chiang Mai and the to the group. Having enough space for a hill country tribal traditions, and hands-free number of small businesses under one roof massage, which utilizes the knees, elbows and sharing communal resources makes it and feet for deep-tissue manipulation. possible to keep rents reasonable, thereby giving individual practitioners some flex- Developing her technique in traditional ibility in their pricing. Still, the venture Thai massage for the past year and a half, was a leap of faith for Eigenberger and her Eigenberger continues to explore comple- new associates. “Everyone has a fear of mentary holistic health practices. “You’re going independent,” she said, “but we’re forever a student at life,” she says, noting all following our passion and doing what how the various aspects of health, the we love.” environment, and nutrition are all inter- connected, “I think a lot of these thera- The Group hosted an open house to an- pies are so complementary.” Working to- nounce its arrival in November. In addi- gether within the support network of the tion to Eigenberger’s Thai massage studio, Dubuque Healing Arts Group is the ideal the Group includes therapeutic massage, place to explore connections between hypnotherapy, reiki, life coaching, Web disciplines and develop a more intuitive site design, yoga classes and, just recently, approach to health maintenance. “The chiropractic care. integrative aspects of bodywork can help get to the root causes of problems,” she explains of the age-old techniques. “This knowledge has always been there and we are now rediscovering it.” Call Elisa at 563-590-1237 or e-mail elisa@dubuque- healingarts.com. Massage Therapy In addition to Eigenberger, therapeutic mas- sage is also offered by licensed massage therapist Maggie Udelhofen. Also trained at Carlson College of Massage Therapy, Udelhofen offers a variety of therapeutic Traditional Thai Massage techniques, including Swedish, deep tissue, While Eigenberger also offers therapeu- and hot stone and chair massage. Since tic, Swedish and deep tissue massage, her beginning her practice, she has doubled specialty is traditional Thai massage. After her client base almost every month. completing her studies at Carlson College of Massage Therapy, she began her mas- Employing an integrative approach, Udel- sage therapy practice. She learned about hofen works with clients to determine Thai massage through trade publications their needs. For those interested in a and became interested in the style because more relaxing massage she might utilize it combined two of her great interests, mas- a Swedish full-body style of massage. For sage and yoga. She traveled to Evanston, those with specific problems, she might Illinois, for intensive study with Chuck utilize deep tissue techniques often di- Duff at the Thai Bodywork School of Thai rected toward specific muscle groups or Massage. Going beyond basic principles, Continued on page 17 THAT’S AN ACTUAL LIBRARY MODEL! 8 DEC 13 - 26

Organizers will be placing “Business 5:30 p.m. with a live auction hosted by the library’s collection of books and oth- Library Renovation Buckets” on the counters of local busi- area sculptor and all-around awesome er materials. Restoration work promises nesses in the next few weeks to collect Gene Tully starting at 7 p.m. A number to return many features of the library to Fundraisers spare change toward the library fund. of local young artists have donated their its historic grandeur while the complete Donors who might want to give more work. Wine and hors d’oeuvres will be renovation will create a more accessible The Library Board of Trustees and sup- than parking meter money can make a available for a donation. Proceeds will functioning library – a community re- porters invite you to “help create the donation via the library’s PayPal account benefit the library renovation project. source for years to come. next chapter” in the continuing history on the library Web site at www.dubuque. of the Carnegie-Stout Public Library. lib.ia.us/. But probably the most fun A major renovation of both the historic For more information about fundraising With a major renovation and restoration and enjoyable way to support the cause library and its more modern addition, events, or to volunteer or donate a piece project on the table, the Board is leading would be to attend the library support- renovation plans include reopening the of art for the Emerging Artists Show and a fundraising campaign with the help of ers’ guest bartending night at Isabella’s historic rotunda and skylights, a resto- Auction, contact Candace Eudaley at library volunteers and citizens. Poten- on Wednesday, December 19. From ration of the historic stacks and reading 563-584-6367 or candace_eudaley@ tial donors will have a variety of ways to 5:30 to 9 p.m., all tips collected will go rooms with special areas for adults, teens, mcgraw-hill.com. contribute. to the Carnegie-Stout Public Library Ren- and children, additional ovation project. A buck per drink! computers, and Make it happen! increasing

Library supporters and art lovers should also mark their calen- dars for Friday, Janu- ary 11. The library will host an Emerg- ing Artists Show and Auction in the his- toric rotunda. The exhibition will begin at In 2008, three of Dubuque’s fin- Combining the resources of three becomes the one and only We invite you to join us in 2008 est salons come together to form great locations, The Captain Merry destination you need for all of as we continually grow and the area’s premier salon and spa Salon & Spa, H.C. & Company, your hair, nail, beauty, massage enhance the service offerings network, and Harmony Salon & Spa, as well and salon services ... no matter and benefits to our clents. as the expertise of the Tri-States’ what side of town you are on. Harmony & Company largest staff of salon and spa Convenience and quality can be And this is only the beginning... Salon & Spa. professionals, Harmony & Company both attainable and affordable! Experience the difference! 365INK: USE IT TO PAY YOUR LANDLORD INSTEAD OF PAYING RENT 10 DEC 13 - 26

CD, a compilation of holiday favorites. Double the Slade, In addition to the holiday music, Teresa, Steve, Jeanne, Andrew, Adrian and Jil- double the fun! lian will perform a selection of Broad- way tunes, as well. With an upcoming performance on Janu- ary 6 nearly sold out, the Bell Tower The- Tickets for the Slade Family Singers are ater has announced that it has added an- $17, with discounts available for groups other date to the appearance of the Slade of 20 or more. For tickets and infor- Family Singers in Dubuque! mation, call 563-588-3377, or visit www.belltowertheater.net. The Slades will now perform on Satur- day, January 5, at 8 p.m., and Sunday, January 6, at 3 p.m. The concerts will celebrate the release of their newest 365INK: CANDLES CAN INDEED SET IT ABLAZE 11 DEC 13 - 26

by Tim Brechlin of all places. Out there, Kelli and Lou know how to throw a heck of a party, A new year brings with it so many and they’re bucking the trend a little bit. promises, so many opportunities ... a You see, New Year’s Eve this year falls clean slate, if you will. Of course, you on a Monday. The Diggs isn’t open on can’t ring in a new year without taking Monday. So they’re hosting a New Year’s the time to bid a fond (or not so fond, if Eve Eve party on Sunday, December 30. you’ve had a scuzzy year) farewell to the How clever of them! They’re bringing in last 364 days. Well, 2007 is wrapping up the Apple Dumplin’s, and if you’ve nev- into 2008 ... so what are your plans for er taken the opportunity to experience saying goodbye to ‘07? the country stylings of this band, you’re missing out and you owe it to yourself to The traditional method of bidding the past head out to New Diggings. The no-cover- year adieu is, of course, a party, and, let’s charge party will begin at 7 p.m., and face it: Dubuque knows how to throw a while they say it’ll end at 11, you never good party, as evidenced by the festivals know ... any party at the Diggs tends to at the Town Clock, St. Patrick’s Day, the have some fireworks in some way or an- Irish Hooley, Halloween, and everything other! in-between and all points beyond. Sev- eral local businesses will indeed be host- Okay, so, you went to the Diggs on Sun- ing a New Year’s Eve celebration ... your day, you wake up on Monday with a head- mission, should you ache, and then you choose to accept it, remember that, holy is to decide just how crap, tonight is New many of these parties Year’s Eve and there’s a you’re going to hit. whole other night of par- tying ahead! Where to begin? Take, for instance, the New Well, you could start in the eve- Diggings General Store and Inn, ning, like most people ... or you located in New Diggings, Wisconsin, Continued on page 15 IT’S THE MOST GRANDERFUL TIME OF THE YEAR 12 DEC 13 - 26

Cadets and Project Concern.

So, you’ve got your tickets. And you’re all set to go to the Grand River Center with your little ones on New Year’s Eve. What are you supposed to expect? Begin- ning at 5, there will be a live DJ So, what exactly providing music and entertain- goes into a Grand New ment, fresh cotton candy making, Year’s Eve celebration? Quite a hula hoop contest (and other families and friends together in a way that a bit, actually. First, you go to any contests throughout the evening), adds quality to their relationships,” say New Year’s Eve: Kwik Stop location and purchase air-brush tattoos, face painting ... coordinators Tom and Lisa Bodner, of LT It’s Not Just for Adults! advance tickets -- $10 for ages 2 oh, and, of course, all the fun stuff Amusements. “We believe that everyone - 17, and $4 for adult tickets. Attendees of that LT Amusements can provide: We’re has a little bit of kid in them, so we’re ring- As one might gather from our feature sto- last year’s event might be a tad puzzled at talking about bounce houses (yes, plural), ing in the New Year in kid style.” ry on all the New Year’s Eve nightlife tak- this, since adults got in for free at that time. giant slides, a rock wall, an obstacle course, ing place, the holiday is a great avenue Well, as it turns out, there were just too a bungee run, a gladiator joust (think Amer- The event is sponsored by L.T. Amuse- for celebration by those in the 21-and-up many people last year -- a good problem to ments, Fun and Games Company, Kwik category. “But wait,” you say to yourself. have! But with so many grandparents and Stop / Dairy Queen, Dubuque Grey- “I have two young children, and I am a parents coming with their children, the hound Park and Casino, the Dubuque good and responsible parent! Carous- center was nearing its maximum capacity. Racing Association, Epic Construction, ing down Main Street is no way for me So, adults now have to pay for admission Coca-Cola, Y-105, WJOD, Kruise War- to spend New Year’s Eve -- my children ... but, as you can see, there’s a heavy dis- than Auto Plaza, Business Telephone Sup- wouldn’t be allowed in the bars!” Well, count. Everyone wins! Oh, and 50 percent ply and, of course, 365ink. don’t you worry. There’s a New Year’s Eve of ticket sales will be donated to the Colt event that’s totally got you covered.

The 2nd Annual Grand New ican Gladiators) ... all Year’s Eve Celebration, runs from the fun, family-friendly 5 to 9 p.m. at the Grand River stuff you can shake a Center on Monday, Decem- stick at. ber 31. (In the event of severe weather, the event will be held “We’re looking to bring from 1 - 4 p.m. on January 1.) a grand celebration to I DON’T WANT TO GROW UP, I’M A TOYS R US KID 13 DEC 13 - 26

though one hopes we learn to hide it doll, so I would not feel jealous or left • Making a relationship work, You’re Not a better once we pass, say, the age of out. I was 18 months old, but in baby- warts and all thirty-five. language I thought: ‘Me grown-up.’ • Paying off your mortgage Of course, it took me years to actu- Kid Anymore There are good things that I’ve lived ally realize that mine was a fast track • Hosting your parents for dinner through which also qualify me as a to adulthood. Now that I’ve done this or picking up the tab at a restaurant My life has been pretty fraught lately. grown-up, and I’ll bet you can add for six decades, I’m considering a late • Completing a major house At one point I asked a friend, “Am I a your own to this list. Among them are childhood, so I’m back in school. That renovation without losing your grown-up now? Do I get a prize?” giving birth to both of my babies, and seems to be a kid thing—a responsi- mind or your spouse putting them in my mother’s arms. ble, grown-up kid thing, of course.”

DUNN Having just celebrated another birth- • Knowing that the truth is somewhere (Dad was too scared he’d drop them.)

- day, there’s no question that I’m tech- between white and black nically an adult. But I’m thinking Both of my weddings were good and My friend Christy says, “Getting up at meaningful times, even though the first 5:30 to shovel snow certainly makes • Giving time, energy, and talent with about those experiences that shake no expectation of getting them back you up and shout, You’re not a kid any- marriage turned out to be a disaster. me know I’m a grown-up.” When her more! One day you realize Mom and sister first moved away from home, • Giving and getting back love Dad aren’t going to make it all bet- Taking my first drive alone with my she only went fifteen miles, and their I sure didn’t want to get that first phone ter, whether “it” is a broken heart, an newly minted driver’s license made father drove there to shovel for her. call telling me my sister was losing her empty checkbook, or a lost job. This me feel like Miss Maturity at the ripe (Sometimes our parents send mixed apartment and would be sent first to the makes you feel grown-up, though not old age of 16. So did putting on my messages about growing up.) hospital and then to a facility for people in a good way. And if the reason Mom first pair of pantyhose for my 6th grade with mental handicaps. But the most and Dad can’t make it all better is that class picture, though that made clear My favorite psychologist/husband grown-up thing you can do, sometimes Mom and Dad aren’t around anymore, the not-so-happy need to learn how has some other thoughts on the sub- (and I’m not patting myself on the back well, that’s not a good feeling, either. ject. He names these experiences that make you a grown-up: here, because it has not been easy), is There are many very bad ways to to realize that while you are being in- feel suddenly mature, and I’ve been • Doing stuff you donÅft like to do convenienced, the person you are help- dragged through a lot of them. I’ve had for the good of others ing is watching her world blow apart. My husband, daughter and son have all to put my mother in a nursing home. • Learning to live in and with been working hard to get that apartment I’ve had to sell her house, the one I another culture grew up in. I gave the eulogy at her emptied out. I’m proud of what we’ve • Not just having kids, but taking funeral. (When my dad died, she was accomplished. We’re quite a band of care of them grown-ups, and it feels good.

PAM KRESS PAM in charge, though the experience of • Seeing the bigger picture and losing one’s first parent is a punch in Pam Kress-Dunn the longer view the stomach that’s certainly another [email protected] growing-up milestone.)

• I have held two wonderful cats while they were euthanized, hop- ing my embrace eased their transition to heaven. I’ve rescued my children from all kinds of predicaments, some more harrowing than others, and I’ve lost a wonderful friend to cancer. Most recently, I have emptied out the apart- ment of my mentally handicapped sister after she was evicted, and talk- ed daily with social workers trying to find a new place for her. That required five trips to Davenport in just over a week, plus too many phone calls to count. It’s been hard, but re- alizing how hard it is for her to lose her place is more grown-up than whining about how incon- venienced I’ve been.

It’s things like this that make me wonder, only a little ironically, Do I get to shave my legs. Is there a negative a gold star now? Of course it’s childish corollary to every happy rite of pas- to even ask. While part of growing up sage? The speeding ticket the comes is simply living through these things, with the driver’s license, the shoveling the greater part of maturity is doing so and mowing that come with the first without expecting a prize. As a per- house? Maybe the ability to recognize son who used to pout when my col- this balance is another aspect of the lege friends would invite me to go to a Zen of maturity. truck stop for a big breakfast right after I had dined alone, my ability to deal My friend Jennifer says she was born with disappointment has had quite a a grown-up. “As the oldest of six, steep learning curve. Perhaps all of when my baby sister came along I was

GIVING VOICE GIVING us retain a measure of childishness, trained as an assistant with my baby ALL THESE BOOKS TO SIGN ... AND NO PENS TO SIGN WITH 14 DEC 13 - 26

The Five Flags Center presents: “The Nutcracker” Tuesdays Dubuque City Youth Ballet and Heartland Ballet ‘Round Midnight Jazz w/ Bill Encke - Isabella’s, 9 p.m. - 12 a.m. Pub Quiz - The Busted Lift, 8 p.m. First 3 Tuesdays of the month. December 14 & 15 at 8:00 p.m. & 16 at 2:00 p.m. Karaoke - Rainbow Lounge, Canfield Hotel, 7:30 p.m. - 2 a.m. Karaoke - Dave Lorenz, Player’s Sports Bar, 9 p.m. - 1:30 a.m. DJ Music - Double J DJ’s, Rooster’s, Platteville, 9 p.m. - 2 a.m. Anderson Weber Presents: Wednesdays Championship Bull Ride Open Mic - Hosted by the Dert Tones, The Busted Lift, 9 p.m. - 1a.m. January 4 & 5, 2008 at 7:30 p.m. Mississippi Band Duo - Galleria Lounge, Fountain Park, 5 p.m. - 8 p.m. Five Flags Arena Live on Main Comedy - 2 great standups, Bricktown, 9 p.m. - 11 p.m. 3100 Club Comedy - Midway Hotel, Bricktown, 9 p.m. - 11 p.m. Tickets Cigar Club, Bartinis, 7 p.m. - 11 p.m. Nick Lullo Presents: WJOD Wild West Wed - (Country Dancing), Fairgrounds, 7 p.m. - 11 p.m. Make Karaoke - C-Sharp, A&B Tap, 8 p.m. - 12 a.m. “Laugh Tour 2008!” Karaoke - Becky McMahon, Denny’s Lux Club 8:30 p.m. -12:30 a.m. Great Karaoke - Borderline Karaoke, Bricktown, 9 p.m. - 1 a.m. Combining the Funny & Fantastic! Karaoke - Rainbow Lounge, Canfield Hotel, 7:30 p.m. - 2 a.m. Friday, January 11, 2008 @ 8:00 p.m. Gifts! Karaoke - Dave Lorenz, Player’s Sports Bar, 9 p.m. - 1:30 a.m. Five Flags Theater Thursdays Ticket Prices: Main Floor $19.50, Live Music - Robbie Bahr & Laura McDonald, Gobbies, Galena, 9 p.m. -1a.m. Balcony $17.50 Y-105 Party Zone - Dbq Co. Fairgrounds, 7 p.m. - 10 p.m. Open Mic - Grape Harbor, 8 p.m. - 10:30 p.m. Open Mic Showcase, Isabella’s 8 p.m. - 12:00 a.m. Karaoke - Rainbow Lounge, Canfield Hotel, 7:30 p.m. - 2 a.m. Karaoke - Rocco - Riverboat Lounge, 8:30 p.m. - 12 a.m. Karaoke - Becky McMahon, Ground Round, 9 p.m. - 12 a.m. Karaoke - Flyin’ Hawaiian, Shannon’s Bar, 9 p.m. - 1 a.m. Karaoke - Soundwave, Bulldog Billiards, 9:30 p.m. - 1:30 a.m. Karaoke - Dave Lorenz, Player’s Sports Bar, 9 p.m. - 1:30 a.m. DJ Music - DJ Brian Imbus, Jumpers, 8:30 p.m. - 1 a.m. DJ Music - Double J DJ’s, Rooster’s, Platteville, 9 p.m. - 2 a.m. Fridays Firewood Friday (3rd Friday’s) - Isabella’s Bar at the Ryan House, 9 p.m. - 1 a.m. Live Music - Leonardo Roldan/Romeo Bautista, Los Aztecas, 6 p.m. - 9 p.m. Karaoke - C-Sharp, A&B Tap, 9 p.m. - 1 a.m. Karaoke - Rainbow Lounge, Canfield Hotel, 7:30 p.m. - 2 a.m. Karaoke - Riverboat Lounge, 8:30 p.m. - 12 a.m. Karaoke - Flyin’ Hawaiian, Sublime, 9 p.m. - 1 a.m. Karaoke, Becky McMahon, 3rd Fridays, Kuepers - Dickeyville, WI, 9p.m Karaoke - C-N-T Entertainment, T.J’s Bent Prop, 9 p.m. - 1 a.m. Sister Hazel Capitol Steps Karaoke - Dave Lorenz, Player’s Sports Bar, 9 p.m. - 1:30 a.m. House of Blues, Chicago, IL • December 28 & 29 Stephens Auditorium, Ames, IA February, 7 Karaoke - Brian Leib’s Essential Entertainment, Aragon Tap, 9 p.m. - 1 a.m. DJ Music - Main Event DJ, Gin Rickeys, 8:30 p.m. - 1:30 a.m. Championship Bull Riding Lord of the Dance DJ Music - Sound Ideas DJ, Timmerman’s Supper Club, 8 p.m.-12 a.m. DJ Music - DJ Brian Imbus, Jumpers, 8:30 p.m. - 1 a.m. Five Flags Civic Center, Dubuque, IA • January 4 Adler Theatre, Davenport, IA • Saturday, February 8 DJ Music - Karaoke w/DJ 007, Riverboat Lounge, 9:30 p.m. - 1 a.m. Trans-Siberian Orchestra Green 17 Tour (Feat. Flogging Molly, more) Saturdays Alliant Energy Center, Madison, WI•Saturday, Jan. 5 House of Blues, Chicago, IL • February 15 Live Comedy - Arthur House Restaurant, Platteville, 9 p.m. - 10:30 p.m. Live Music - Leonardo Roldan/Romeo Bautista, Los Aztecas, 6 p.m. - 9 p.m. Ron White Rascal Flatts Bluff Street Live Open Mic, Mississippi Mug, 8 p.m. - 12 a.m. Des Moines Civic Center, Des Moines, IA •January, 19 i wireless Center, Moline, IL • Friday, February 18 Karaoke - Borderline Karaoke, Bricktown, 9p.m. - 1 a.m. Karaoke - Rainbow Lounge, Canfield Hotel, 7:30 p.m. - 2 a.m. Big Bad Voodoo Daddy Dierks Bentley Karaoke - Riverboat Lounge, 8:30 p.m. - 12 a.m. House of Blues, Chicago, IL • Wednesday, Jan. 24 Rosemont Theater, Rosemont, IL, February 22 Karaoke - C-Sharp, A&B Tap, 9 p.m. - 1 a.m. Karaoke - Flyin Hawaiian, George & Dales, (East Dub.) 9p.m. - 1 a.m. Brian Regan Newsboys Karaoke - Dave Lorenz, Player’s Sports Bar, 9 p.m. - 1:30 a.m. Paramount Theater, Cedar Rapids, IA • January 24 Val Air Ballroon, Wes DesMoines, IA, February, 23 Karaoke - Starburst Karaoke, w/Dave Winders, Instant Replay, 9 p.m.-1a.m. DJ Music - Main Event DJ, Gin Rickeys, 8:30 p.m. - 1:30 a.m. Martina McBride Martina McBride DJ Music - Sound Ideas DJ, Timmerman’s Supper Club, 8 p.m.-12 a.m. Hilton Coliseum, Ames, IA • Sunday, January 27 Alliant Energy Center, Madison, WI • Saturday, Feb. 24 Sundays Buffalo Tom Tom Jones Open Mic with Sean Kramer (Mississippi Flat Miners), A&B Tap, 9 p.m. - 1 a.m. Double Door, Chicago, IL * February 2 The Meadows, Altoona, IA • March 12 Karaoke - Flyin’ Hawaiian, Knicker’s Saloon, 9 p.m. - 1 a.m. Karaoke - Phoenix Entertainment, The Hangout (East Dub.), 9 p.m. - 3 a.m. Indigo Girls Riverdance House of Blues, Chicago, IL • february 4 Des Moines Civic Center, DesMoines, IA • March 14 SUNDAY DINNERS AT 180 MAIN. SWEET. 15 DEC 13 - 26

the Irish Cottage in Galena. In addition to all the fantastic food available from the pub, the festivities will begin at 2 p.m. with the music of Tony Leonard, who will take attendees all the way through to the Irish New Year at 6 p.m., followed by two performances of the Clad- to midnight, and live Beatlemaniatacular dagh Irish Dancers, and winding down music from 365’s very own Ralph Kluse- with music by Joe Smith beginning at 8 man. Great food with great music ... hard p.m. and continuing into the night as the to go wrong with that. Reservations are re- pints of Guinness disappear, the good quired, and you can make them by calling times rise and Irish eyes are smiling. In 815-777-3958. Fried Green Tomatoes is the words of the Irish, “Go mbeire muid located at 213 N. Main Street in Galena. and then the action moves downstairs to beo ar an am seo arís.” (May we be alive the Busted Lift, where Wylde Nept (most at this time next year. And, no, we don’t Two more Galena Continued from page 11 recently seen at the Irish Hooley in Au- know how to say it.) nightlife hotspots, could decide to throw caution to the wind gust) will play from 5 to 9 p.m., and then the Grape Escape Tickets and start celebrating the new annum right Kent Burnside and the New Generation and Benjamin’s, from the start! There will be two official will continue the party from 9 p.m. until 1 will have New Make locations for those who wish to start par- a.m. Admission is only $5, and it includes Year’s parties as Great tying early. The Busted Lift and 180 Main, a champagne toast. well. The Grape Escape, with its decadent for those in Dubuque, will be hosting a wines, delicious martinis and fun atmo- Gifts! double Irish and American New Year cel- Also in Galena, Fred Bonnet and the crew sphere, will be host to the acoustic duo ebration: Remember, Ireland is six hours of Fried Green Tomatoes will be hosting of Apathy Blue, and the establishment is ahead of us. The fun will begin at 3 p.m. a New Year’s celebration of their own. offering a champagne special: For $30, with Pat Reidy & the Lads playing upstairs The other daylong celebration will be The festivities will begin at 9 p.m., with guests can enjoy a bottle of Mionetto’s at 180 Main. They’ll play until held about 15 miles to the east, at, you the night to include a champagne toast, Prosecco Brut. What better way to cel- 6, for the Irish New Year, guessed it, Frank O’Dowd’s Irish Pub at food specials, party favors, a countdown ebrate the new year than with a glass of Continued on page 25 WE WANT TO HEAR MAYOR BUOL SING CHEAP TRICK 16 DEC 13 - 26

and I performed “Holly Jolly Christmas,” Goldsmith, our remarkable DSO, and all complete with a…well, impromptu, little the talented performers for sharing their dance number; and a wonderful spirited stage with me! To Medical Associates concert was enjoyed by all! A new twist which has sponsored the Holiday Pops on a Dubuque tradition…and, without a for the past 22 years, thank you for help- doubt, a cherished memory for me (and ing to serve our community and enrich Deb who, naturally, attended all three lives. And last, but not least, to our audi- concerts) for years to come! ences … blessings to you and yours this Christmas holiday season. We thank you My gratitude goes to William Intrilliga- for your interest in and support of the tor, Paul Hemmer, DSO President Jeff arts…cherished Dubuque traditions! “Cherishing Dubuque Traditions” by Mayor Roy D. Buol

People worldwide celebrate holidays. Al- Paul Hemmer’s home for a Hemmer an- though the word “holiday” literally means nual tradition, a “Christmas Sing-Along “holy day,” most American holidays are (or not) Party! As we all gathered around now celebrated in reflective traditions. In the grand piano that graces their living fact, in the United States, the word “holi- room, joining our voices in festive holi- day” is synonymous with “celebration.” day song, William Intrilligator turned The festivities continue throughout the his “conductor’s” ear toward me. At the holiday season; Dubuque sparkles with end of one particular Christmas Carol holiday displays, house parties and galas; he said, “Roy, I didn’t know you could and familiar are the bell ringers and orga- sing?!” From that point forward, he and nizations reminding us of the true “spirit Paul began talking about “next year’s of Christmas.” Holiday Pops” and perhaps a “cameo role” for the mayor. To my surprise, their Like communities across our great nation, conversations turned into what became a Dubuque has developed its own set of tra- totally new format for the Pops Concert, ditions -- comforting in their familiarity and modeled on popular variety shows, with binding in their repetition. Yet also, those an invitation for me to serve as emcee, cherished yuletide traditions sometimes and to sing a little too! make room for fresh faces and changing circumstances. Such was true this year for I was honored to accept and privi- the annual Holiday Pops Concert at the leged to join a truly amazing cast of Five Flags Theatre! musicians and singer/performers! Fa- vorite musical pieces and several new It all began about this time last year arrangements by Paul Hemmer framed when Deb and I were invited to Jan and the concert performance which took the audience around the world! Joining the Dubuque Symphony Orchestra (direct- ed by Maestro William Intril- ligator) were the Dubuque Chorale (directed by Francis John Vogt); the Wahlert High School A-Capella Choir (di- rected by Pam Mumm); Steve & Terry Slade and Family (di- rected by…well, I’m not sure who calls the shots in that fam- ily); and yours truly!

The weekend’s performances were sold out (although weather hampered Saturday’s participa- tion). It was wonderful to look out into the audience to see the big eyes and wide smiles of so many children at Sunday’s mati- nee, joining with their parents in the “sing-along” portion of the program with such Christ- mas favorites as White Christ- mas, Silent Night, and Feliz Navidad! Paul and I enjoyed a dialogue reminiscent of the old-time radio shows; Santa I ONCE HAD HYPNOTHERAPY. I WAS EATING TOO MUCH BACON 17 DEC 13 - 26

low traveled extensively, visiting India and eventually settling in an Ashram there, where she taught English for 21 years. In 2005 she returned to care for her mother, who had suffered a stroke. As part of her recovery, her mother underwent massage therapy. As it turned out, her massage therapist also practiced reiki. At her moth- er’s first reiki session, she had to be helped up on the table. When Whitlow returned an hour later, she was amazed how re- laxed and nimble her mother had become and was immediately convinced of reiki’s power to promote healing. The experience stimulated her interest in the technique, which she first learned to practice on her mother to aid with her recovery.

Now working with Piekenbrock, whom she met through a group reiki session, Whit- Eventually she would like to work toward a low incorporates sound therapy, which Ph.D. in holistic health, but is currently in uses resonating tuning forks placed at key training for theophostic therapy – a Christ- points on the body. She is currently learn- centered approach where a practitioner ing more about color and crystal therapies. prays together with the client. Described Like her colleagues, Whitlow sees the as similar to hypnotherapy, theophostic value in the integrative aspects of various therapy is less concentrated on emotional therapies – in both holistic and traditional release. While Christian-based, Goetz- health care. “We don’t think of these as ‘al- inger says it can be effective for people ternative’ but more of complementary prac- Continued from page 7 who don’t necessarily consider themselves tices to existing health care,” she explains. “There’s nothing like penicillin when you problem areas. Client interviews can spiritual. Call Tracy at 563-590-8876 or need it.” Call Susie at 563-543-1423 or e- sometimes determine possible causes e-mail [email protected]. mail [email protected]. Call or suggest particular stretches or other Nancy at 563-663-0413 or e-mail nancy@ complimentary therapies she might rec- dubuquehealingarts.com. ommend. Glad to be part of the Healing Arts Group, Udelhofen seems to have found her niche among her colleagues. Life Coaching “I think everybody has the same be- Ultimate Potential Coaching is a collabo- liefs, the same focus on holistic health,” ration between Dawn Cogan and Stacy she says. “We’re all focused on holistic Tull-Leino. In the role of life coaches, the health as a healing art.” Call Maggie duo offers guidance to help clients un- at 563-495-5710 or e-mail maggie@ lock their hidden potential “to live a life dubuquehealingarts.com. that honors your values, and is in direct alignment with your passions and life pur- pose.” Cogan and Tull-Leino offer person- al coaching for adults or children, as well as group seminars and workshops. With a Reiki strong focus on parenting and children’s Susie Piekenbrock and Nancy Whitlow issues, they can help with behavior issues, work as partners in Gentle Awakenings anxiety, depression, ADD/ADHD, or just Reiki at the Healing Arts Group. The duo help kids gain confidence in themselves practices Usui Reiki, a Japanese comple- and their abilities. Call Dawn at 563-581- mentary healing technique where a prac- 7583, Stacy at 563-580-8554, or e-mail titioner directs healing energy through the [email protected]. hands to the client. Once considered a more alternative therapy, reiki is gaining Continued on page 28 widespread acceptance by mainstream Hypnotherapy healthcare, being offered Tracy Goetzinger offers hypnotherapy in hospitals throughout and counseling as part of the Healing the United States, includ- Arts Group. A certified hypnotherapist ing Johns Hopkins, Stan- and certified addictions counselor, she ford Medical Center, and specializes in anxiety, depression, anger, Mercy Medical Center addictions, and unhealthy relationships. here in Dubuque. “Instead of trying to mask symptoms, I work with addressing the underlying Whitlow became con- issues at the core,” she explains. With vinced of reiki’s efficacy four years of experience in counseling, by witnessing its dramat- Goetzinger is completing her master’s in ic effect on her mother. A clinical psychology this month. Dubuque native, Whit- Saturday, December 15 Friday, December 21

Justin Morrissey Ken Wheaton 19 Grape Escape, 9 PM - 1 AM Stone Cliff Winery, 7 - 10 PM

BlackBloom John Moran Da Vinci’s, 9 PM - 1 AM Grape Harbor, 8 PM - 12 AM

Runside Down Firewood Revival Isabella’s, 9 PM - 12 AM Isabella’s, 8 PM - 12 AM

DRILL Jimmy Berg & Dave Pinkle Doolittle’s (Cuba), 10 PM - 2 AM Grape Escape, 9 PM - 1 AM

James Kinds & the All-Night Riders 98 in the Shade Busted Lift, 9 PM - 1 AM Dagwood’s, 9 PM - 2 AM

Doug & Lisa Frey Paul McHugh Grape Harbor, 9 PM - 12 AM Irish Cottage, 8 - 11 PM

Arctic Thunder Sunday, December 16 Red N Deb’s, 9 PM - 1 AM

3rd Annual Christmas Auction The Rocket Surgeons New Diggings Store, 12 - 9 PM Friday, December 14 Saturday, December 15 Gobbie’s, 9:30 PM - 12:30 AM Chuck Bregman The Do Overs The Boys’ Night Out Catch 3 Anton’s Saloon, 2 - 8 PM Sandy Hook Tavern, 10 PM - 2 AM Red N Deb’s, 8 PM - 12 AM Grand Harbor, 5:30 - 9:30 PM Open Mic w/ Sean Kramer The Blueheels Katie & Brownie Sounds of Nashville A&B Tap, 8 PM -1 2 AM Busted Lift, 9 PM - 1 AM Irish Cottage, 8 - 11 PM Mooney Hollow Barn, 8 PM - 12 AM Tony Walker Nothin’ But Dylan Katie & Brownie Sandy Hook Tavern, 9 PM - 1 AM Saturday, Stone Cliff Winery, 7 - 11 PM Irish Cottage, 8 - 11 PM December 22 Sid V & the Human Resources Jammer Tuesday, December 18 Softtails Saloon, 9 PM - 1 AM Softtails, Saloon, 9 PM - 1 AM Jason Ray Brown Open Jazz Jam Grand Harbor, 5:30 - 9:30 PM One Hat Band Jabberbox Isabella’s, 8 - 11 PM Grape Escape, 9 PM - 1 AM Jumpers, 9 PM - 1 AM Paul McHugh Wednesday, Dec. 19 Irish Cottage, 8 - 11 PM ochOsol Richter Scale Busted Lift, 9 PM - 1 AM Red N Deb’s, 9 PM - 1 AM Nothin’ But Dylan Open Mic w/ Dert Tones Dubuque Driving Range, Busted Lift, 9 PM - 1 AM Nick Stika Taste Like Chicken! 8 PM - 12 AM Grape Harbor, 9 PM - 12 AM Pit Stop, 9 PM - 1 AM Library Fundraiser Event Not Too Shabby Isabella’s, 5:30 - 9 PM BadFish Massey Road Main St. Pub (Cuba), Jumpers, 9 PM - 1 AM The Wharf, 9 PM - 1 AM 8:30 PM - 12:30 AM Thursday, December 20 BlackBloom The Boys’ Night Out The Dert Tones Bricktown, 9 PM - 1 AM Rumor’s, 9 PM - 1 AM Open Mic Night Copper Kettle, 9 PM - 1 AM Grape Harbor, 7:30 - 11:30 PM Massey Road Julien’s Bluff Jabberbox Dino’s, 10:30 PM - 2:30 AM Dog House Lounge, 9 PM - 1 AM Open Mic Night Ace’s Place, 9 PM - 1 AM Isabella’s, 5:30 - 9 PM

DUBUQUE365.com Saturday, December 22 Thursday, December 27

98 in the Shade Denny Garcia Murph’s South End, 9 PM - 1 AM Murph’s South End, 9 PM - 1 AM

Menace Open Mic Night Softtails Saloon, 9 PM - 1 AM Grape Harbor, 7:30 - 11:30 PM Just the Two of Us Friday, Dec. 28 Grape Escape, 9 PM - 1 AM Joe Smith Hard Salami Irish Cottage, 8 - 11 PM Dirty Ernie’s, 9 PM - 1 AM Maureen Kilgore Renegade Band Grape Harbor, 9 PM - 12 AM Red N Deb’s, 9 PM - 1 AM 98 in the Shade Scott & Michelle Dalziel Da Vinci’s, 9 PM - 2 AM Isabella’s, 9 PM - 1 AM Mississippi Band BadFish Isabella’s, 8 PM - 12 AM Bronco Inn, 9 PM - 1 AM Ken Wheaton Grape Escape, 9 PM - 12 AM The Kissers Busted Lift, 9 PM - 1 AM Zero 2 Sixty Softtails Saloon, 9 PM - 1 AM Blue Willow Grape Harbor, 8 PM - 12 AM Taste Like Chicken Sandy Hook Tavern, 10 PM - 2 AM Sunday, December 23 Saturday, December 29 Chuck Bregman Nothin’ but Dylan Anton’s Saloon, 2 - 8 PM Stone Cliff Winery, 7 - 11 PM Arctic Thunder Richter Scale New Diggings Store, 3:30 - 7:30 PM DBQ Driving Range, 7 - 11 PM Apple Dumplin’s Joe Smith Sandy Hook, 8 PM - 12 AM Irish Cottage, 8 - 11 PM 98 in the Shade One Hat Band Coe’s Bar, 9 PM - 1 AM Grape Harbor, 9 PM - 12 AM

Tuesday, Dec. 25 98 in the Shade Softtails Saloon, 9 PM - 1 AM Open Jazz Jam Isabella’s, 8 PM - 12 AM Massey Road Dog House Lounge, 9 PM - 1 AM 98 in the Shade Joe Mama’s, 9 PM - 1 AM Nate Jenkins Grape Escape, 9 PM - 1 AM Readings Under the Influence Busted Lift, 8 - 11 PM Old Panther & Others Busted Lift, 9 PM - 1 AM Wednesday, Dec. 26 Sunday, December 30 Open Mic w/ Dert Tones Chuck Bregman Busted Lift, 9 PM - 1 AM Anton’s Saloon, 2 - 8 PM Thursday, Joe Smith Irish Cottage, 8 - 11 PM December 27 Apple Dumplin’s Joe Smith New Diggings, 7 - 11 PM Irish Cottage, 8 - 11 PM 98 in the Shade 98 in the Shade Sandy Hook Tavern, 10 PM - 2 AM Copper Kettle, 9 PM - 1 AM See the special feature article Open Mic Night on New Year’s events for all Isabella’s, 5:30 - 9 PM the parties we have informa- tion on thus far on page 11. I HAVE A SEVENTH DEGREE OF KEVIN BACON: MORE BACON 20 DEC 13 - 26 SHALOM NEW YEAR JOHN EDWARDS &KEVIN BACON If you like to go out for New Year’s Eve, but the idea of hopping from bar to bar ...yes, Kevin Bacon. and perhaps drinking to excess really, really doesn’t sound like your idea of a good night ... don’t fret. Shalom Re- treat Center is hosting the New Year’s Eve Alternative Way to Celebrate, an evening of food, fun and prayer begin- ning at 6:30 p.m.

Fr. John Haugen, the Dean of Campus The candidates just Spiritual Life at Loras College, will lead keep rolling on through the evening, which will begin with a town, don’t they? And bountiful dinner, followed by time to it seems like the visits are becoming reflect on years both old and new, a even more frequent as the buildup celebration of the Eucharistic Liturgy, a to the Iowa caucuses continues. Hey, party, and it will conclude with prayer look! Here’s another one! Former to bring in the new year. Participants Senator and Democratic presidential are encouraged to bring their personal candidate John Edwards will be cam- 2007 and 2008 calendars to use dur- paigning at Loras College with a Town ing the reflection time. Hall meeting on Saturday, December 15 ... and he’ll be joined by movie star The offering to attend is $30 per per- Kevin Bacon! (Six degrees, Ben Stiller, son, which includes the dinner and go!) Bacon, who performs in the rock program. Registration and prepayment duo The Bacon Brothers, will be giv- are required by December 26. To reg- ing a musical performance during the ister, call Shalom at 563-582-3592 or campaign stop. The event will be held mail a check made payable to “Sha- in the Alumni Center’s third-floor ball- lom Retreat Center” to 1001 Davis St., room and will begin at 10:45 a.m. For Dubuque, IA 52001. more information, call 563-582-5981. WELCOME BACK, NICK! NOW COME BACK HOME! 21 DEC 13 - 26

meade, or honey wine. In Ger- The Quest for the Seven Mugs of Christmas: man this is spelled meth, and with by Nicholas J. Klenske the drink’s signature aftertaste of A Drinking Adventure cough syrup, one has to wonder if Every journey is a quest, especially when we think, “Do we really have six more of it’s just imported from Iowa. it involves the always-toxic combina- these markets to go?” tion of alcohol, Germany and Chad Van Upon entering the fifth market, Cleve. Granted, our trip does not begin Fast-forward four more drinks and it sud- which is located on a boat an- as an adventure, it in fact starts innocent- denly dawns on us: Each market has a chored on the Rhine, we initially ly enough. mug. How could we be so blind? Obvi- panic, thinking we have been ously we have no choice but to collect duped into entering a legitimate, My wife, Kara, and I are traveling to Co- a mug from each market. It is our des- food and beverage free craft mar- logne to meet our good friends and fel- tiny. Our thinking now: “One down, six ket. But alas, our navy blue and low Dubuquers Chad and Jen Van Cleve, more to go.” And thus, the Quest for the slightly frosted mug awaits on the who now reside in Rotterdam. The plan Seven Mugs of Christmas commences. ship’s frigid deck, whose chilly “Of course,” I say as I leap off my stool is to meet for a weekend of shopping at Like metrosexual (that is, European) In- condition creates the perfect excuse to with a disturbing level of excitement. the city’s historic Christmas Markets. Yes, diana Joneses donning scarves instead of warm one’s body with more gluhwein. “The Seventh Mug of Christmas isn’t a that’s right: An entire weekend of shopping leather fedoras, we set off. mug at all. Well, it is, but only in the at massive, crowded, outdoor arts and craft At Neumarkt, the sixth market of the day, metaphysical way: Like a chalice that markets. Hence, our need for a twist. we almost fall for an imposter as one cedar cabin is serving our drink from holds the spirit of Christmas itself.” I con- tinue to lecture the bar’s now cautiously Now remember, these Christmas Mar- a glorified Dixie cup. Yet we call this curious crowd. kets are in Germany and, like every- scrooge’s bluff just in the nick of time, thing in Germany, or Europe for that and are able to stumble our way to the “The Seventh Mug of Christmas is the matter, alcohol is involved. Which of real deal: An enchanting clear glass mug mug filled with the comfort and joys that course is the instigator of our intoxi- etched with a cartoon Santa decor. And can only be found when in the comforts cating little quest. then there is Seven. But Seven is not there. of home,” I continue at an ever-accelerat- ing pace. “It’s not yet Christmas and I am Although Cologne’s Christmas Markets do Granted, we have been drinking for surely not home, so of course our quest have an abundance of carved wooden San- an entire day, but we do have two cannot be complete. This weekend is ta figurines, horrendously colored knitted things going for us: One, we are only meant to give us a taste of the warm- scarves and a diverse assortment of other from Dubuque, and two, we have ing and intoxicating aroma of Christmas. yuletide crap, the main focus is on the the benefit of spreading our in- And, yes, now I get it. I know exactly food and drink - primarily of the fried and dulgences over the many hours where the last mug can be found!” alcoholic variety. Eating such delicacies of the day. as fried potatoes topped with lard, greasy S t o p “Where?” the crowd gasps in united ex- sausage, cream doused dumplings, salty n u m b e r So, to all you skeptics, no, it isn’t citement as they skate towards the edge pretzels, sticky nougat and not-quite-Bel- two is the leg- that we just cannot find the seventh of their chairs. gian-chocolates, one is left with a lingering endary Cathedral mar- market. We are men after all and, even hint of thirst. Thankfully, the Germans live ket, located adjacent to the overbearing more, men with maps. No, we are defi- “My Seventh Mug of Christmas is waiting up to their reputation of being prepared for gothic Dom, where we quickly acquire nitely at the right plaza. We even circle back home,” I declare. “It’s sitting on my everything and have plenty of liquids on our second treasure. This bound-for-the- around twice before I send Chad to walk parents’ kitchen table, filled to the brim hand to quench one’s holiday pallet. mantel- place trophy is a colorful red mug in on the middle of a church service just to with Pabst Blue Ribbon Beer, oh, that painted with a whimsical cityscape of the make sure the market isn’t hiding inside. sweet nectar of the gods, patiently wait- The Christmas drink of choice is gluh- ancient Cologne skyline complete with a ing for me to get home.” wein, or warm red wine best when gar- floating penguin set adrift atop a solitary Nothing. nished with a powerful yet completely iceberg (both of which can actually be I can almost taste it now… unnecessary shot of rum. More so, each seen after many mugs of gluwhein). Clearly our quest has been foiled, as Christmas Market serves the drink in its there is no seventh Christmas market and Nicholas J. Klenske, formerly of Dubuque, own specially designed, commemorative The AlterMarkt round is rather unevent- definitely no Seventh Christmas mug. is a freelance writer living in Brussels. He Christmas mug. As Chad’s and my taste ful, beyond the intense and clearly gluh- Depressed, rejected and perhaps a tad was a contributor to 365ink for more than buds acclimate to their first flirtation with wein induced deliberations of whether bit drunk, we decide to comfort our mis- a year. He currently serves as the editor the potent drink’s uniquely sharp taste, the blue or the white mug is the officially ery with a round of beer, lethargically of BART International, Europe’s leading sanctioned one. After coming to consumed from a very ordinary and very business aviation publication. Contact the conclusion it is the blue, Chad non-Christmas mug. him through www.KlenskeInk.com. and I celebrate our early success with another round … or two. But a good Christmas story simply can- After all, once you shell out the not end with such gloom. And, although three Euros for what in hindsight this may not be a good Christmas story, is nothing but an overpriced fu- I will not let it end like this. So here’s ture garage sale item, the refills the Happy Ever After, the “Yes, Virginia, are heavily discounted. there is a Santa Claus” and the “Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night”: The fourth mug turns out not to be a mug at all but more of a chal- For, you see, I am an optimist and an ob- ice. It comes from the city’s Me- jectivist and, when inebriated, a creativ- dieval-themed market, which is ist. Thus, it suddenly dawns on me that highlighted by fifers, wenches, an perhaps our quest is not yet over. Perhaps open bonfire and, instead of gluh- the Seventh and final mug of Christmas is wein, the more medieval favored not here in Cologne after all. THAT’S TOTALLY A MYSPACE PHOTO 22 DEC 13 - 26

So often, people start with mistrust rath- New Diggings General Store and Inn Trust or Mistrust? er than trust. Mistrusting others creates Sunday, December 16th 2007 fear and anxiety resulting in more mis- Silent Auction @ Noon • Live Auction @ 3 p.m. Do you start relationships with trust or trust. Mistrust set everyone up for fail- Music 6pm - 9 pm : The One Hat Band mistrust? Trust is acceptance of some- ure and prepares you in advance to pass The Benton School District Empty Stocking Fund and The Hazel thing as true or reliable without being Green Food Pantry were well cared for from the proceeds of last criticism and judgement. An environ- year’s auction. They will be joined by a third charity as we do it LIVE MUSIC able to verify it. When you trust some- ment of mistrust grows steadily and you again in 2007! CALENDAR! one, you expect them to do what they become guarded and second guessing There are many ways to help support the New Diggings General •One Hat Band say they will do. Mistrust is question- everything. Relationships are damaged Store and Inn’s 3rd Annual Christmas Auction and the Secret Sun., Dec. 16, 6:00- 9:00 PM ing trust and believing there is a hidden Santa Tree. You can donate an unwrapped gift for the auction by and often, nothing can change repair Sunday December 9th, a perishable unwrapped gift by Saturday •Arctic Thunder PM agenda. Trust is the most important fac- that damage. It is an interesting thing, December 15th, you can select a mitten off the Secret Santa Tree Sun., Dec. 23, 3:30-7:30 tor in the success of relationships. and shop to brighten a child’s holiday, or you can simply show up when you mistrust someone, they live on December 16th and join all the fun of the Auction! Win prizes, NEW YEAR’S EVE... EVE! have tons of fun and get in the Christmas spirit with the Diggs! •The Apple Dumplin’s And don’t forget, firewood raffle tickets $2 each. Delivery within a Sun., Dec. 30, 7 - 11 PM 20 mile radius of the Diggs. Join us for fun and a good cause.

Starting relationships with trust (rath- up to those expectations as well. er than mistrust) lets you to derive maximum benefit. Trust leads to ac- Even though trust brings vulnerability, it complishments that are otherwise not is essential for successful relationships. possible. It is a big advantage taking It is unfortunate if you cannot start rela- people for their word and giving them tionships with mistrust because of past the benefit of the doubt. When you experiences. It is true that starting with trust others, you increase their value. trust leaves you open for hurt and there People who are trusted tend to live will always be people who will take ad- up to those expectations and do their vantage of that trust. It is much better very best to not let that trust fail. Liv- to start with trust and give people the ing and operating each day is a matter benefit of the doubt. If you repeatedly of trusting others. Trust is the glue for start relationships with mistrust, you successful relationships. may find yourself very lonely. 1% Mattitude Improvement Tip Phone Communication to provide that information quickly, listeners will either zone out or hang up When you use the phone, on you. 3. End on a high note. Always communication rules change. The main thank listeners for their time, and then change is you cannot see the person allow them to hang up first. The click you are talking to. It is also more of the phone in their ears is no way to challenging to capture and keep others end telephone conversations. attention over the phone. Here is what you should do: 1. Slow your rate of Matt Booth, MAC, is a highly sought after speech. Get there attention and keep speaker, and trainer, who works with it by slowing down how fast you talk. individuals, organizations and business 2. Get right to the point. Answer the that wish to improve productivity and big questions right away. They need to profitability. To sign up for his monthly know “Who are you?” “Why are you ezine, email [email protected]. calling?” “What’s in it for me?” and To inquire about getting Mattitude in “How long will this take?” If you fail person, email [email protected]. Contact Matt today at 563-590-9693 or e-mail [email protected]. FEED DOGS ... WITH CATS 23 DEC 13 - 26 Cranberry Orange Brie All You Do

All You Need Generously butter a 12-by-18-inch baking RECIPE sheet. Set aside. In a Dutch oven, heat the 1 (12 oz) round Brie cheese sugar, corn syrup, water and butter to 275 1/3 cup whole-berry cranberry sauce degrees, stirring occasionally. Stir in pe- 2 tbsp packed Hy-Vee brown sugar cans. Continue cooking until temperature 1 tsp Hy-Vee orange juice reaches 300 degrees, stirring constantly. 1 tbsp brandy Remove from heat; stir in vanilla, baking 1/4 cup Hy-Vee chopped walnuts soda and pie spice. Pour mixture onto crackers or slices of crusty bread prepared baking sheet and let cool. Break All You Do into bite-size pieces and store in air-tight container. Makes 2-1/4 lbs (72 servings). Remove top rind of Brie to within 1/4 inch of the edge. Cover and refrigerate. Brie can Nutrition facts: 50 calories, 8g carbs, 0g be prepared up to 1 day ahead. In medium protein, 3g fat, 35mg sodium. bowl, stir together cranberry sauce, sugar, orange juice, brandy and walnuts. Heat oven to 425 degrees. Line baking sheet Feeding Furry Friends will drink what they need. with parchment paper. Place Brie on bak- ing sheet; spoon cranberry mixture over Happy, healthy holidays! ‘Tis the season Move more: Walking is good for you and Ah Nuts! top. Bake 4 to 6 minutes or until cheese is to focus on good health and good eating! your pet too. Pets and people who walk hot but not melted. Serve with crackers or That includes your pets too. Pets need regularly tend to weigh less and have Nutrition in a Nutshell slices of crusty bread. Serves 12. good nutrition, just like you. When feed- better muscle tone. Walking also im- ing your canine companion and cats too, proves cardiovascular fitness and helps It’s time to crack open the truth about nuts. Nutrition facts: 130 calories, 21g carbs, keep health in mind: prevent diseases related to obesity such Yes, they are high in fat, but it is a good 3g protein, 9g fat, 1g fiber, 180mg - so as diabetes. type of fat. Nuts are also one of the best dium. Live lean: Just like people, pets tend to sources of plant protein. They are filled live longer lives if they keep a lean body Want to learn more about pet nutrition with fiber and rich in important nutrients weight. Even a moderately overweight and health? Logon to Hy-VeePets.Com. like vitamin E, folate and potassium. Nuts dog is susceptible to insulin resistance also contain hard-to-find essential nutri- which can lead to diabetes. Overweight ents like copper and magnesium. dogs tend to develop high blood pressure Canine Cookies For gift giving, make with holiday and arthritis. Plus. plump puppy dogs

RECIPE shaped cookie cutters. Nuts are linked to improving heart can’t play fetch as well as they should. health, fighting cancer and even prevent- All you need ing cataracts. While all nuts have similar Focus on fats: A healthy blend of es- nutritional benefit, each type of nut has a sential fatty acids – especially omega 6 2 cups whole wheat flour special claim to fame: and some omega 3 fatty acids - is impor- 1/2 cup Hy-Vee nonfat dry milk tant for dog health. Omega 6 fats help 1/4 tsp Hy-Vee garlic powder Almonds are good for your heart. Just maintain a strong immune system, good 1 Hy-Vee large egg one small handful of almonds once a blood circulation, better wound healing 1 (4 oz) jar Hy-Vee Mother’s Choice beef week has been shown to help decrease and healthy skin with a shiny furry coat. and vegetable baby food the risk of heart disease by 25%. These important fats are found in vegeta- 1/2 cup Hy-Vee beef broth

Spiced Pecan Brittle ble oils and seafood. Look for a quality All you do Brazil nuts are extremely rich in the im- pet food with the right kind of fat portant, yet hard-to-find, cancer-fighting RECIPE All You Need Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Combine all mineral selenium. Selenium is especially ingredients and shape into a ball. Add more 2 cups Hy-Vee granulated sugar Water: Water is essential for life. It helps beneficial for preventing lung, colon and transport important nutrients throughout flour if dough is too sticky. Roll dough out prostate cancer. For better health, eat a 1 cup light corn syrup to 1/4-inch thickness and cut into desired 1/2 cup water the body. It helps dogs maintain the right Brazil nut a day. Buy plenty when they body temperature even during extreme shapes. Place on greased baking sheet. are in season and freeze (they crack eas- 1/4 cup Hy-Vee butter Bake 30 minutes; cool completely. Store 2 cups pecans halves heat. Water keeps joints lubricated, ier when frozen). making it easier for dogs to run, jump in an air-tight container for up to 2 weeks. 1 tsp Hy-Vee vanilla Store remaining cookies in the freezer for 1 1/2 tsp Hy-Vee baking soda and play. Keep cool, refreshing water Pecans top the list of foods with the high- available for your pet all day long. They longer shelf life. Makes 24 treats. est level of antioxidant activity. Pecans 1 tsp pumpkin pie spice have been linked to reducing the risk of heart disease and cancer and lowering cholesterol.

Walnuts are filled with heart-healthy omega-3 fats. It’s the same type of good fat found in salmon and flax seed. Ome- ga-3 fats help prevent hardening of the arteries, are linked to lowering triglyc- erides and prevent heart attacks and strokes.

Enjoy nuts while they are in season by trying one of our many nutritious nut recipes at Hy-VeeHealth.Com. IS JEFF STILES DARK HELMET, THEN? 24 DEC 13 - 26

stepchildren had in fact met me at the Lonestar performance. Life Stiles The A Cappella Choir from Walhert High School did its typical amazing schtick to Maybe it’s related to my little girl’s love kick off the night, complete with dancing Isn’t Lonestar of everything having to do with horses? moves and incredible harmonies, and 45 She took riding lessons this past summer, a Steakhouse? minutes later, it was finally time for our fea- she’s been spending as many weekends by Jeff Stiles tured presentation. The first half of the “My as possible riding horses on my in-laws’ Christmas List” show didn’t actually include farm in Epworth, and all year she’s been Don’t tell anyone, but I’ve never been a any songs off Lonestar’s new holiday compi- begging me to buy her a horse. Asking big fan of country music. lation—coincidentally titled My Christmas me to “pony up,” as it were. List—but rather featured a performance of a looks to notice such a minor technicality Yes, I grew up in the foothills of the Blue number of the group’s biggest hits over the as off-key vocals. Therefore, when 365ink publisher Bryce Ridge Mountains in southwest Virginia, last decade, including “Amazed” and “My Parks asked me two weeks ago if I’d like where bluegrass seemed to be all the rage Front Porch Looking In.” A good time ended up being had by all— tickets to the Lonestar concert at Five during my childhood. And yes, during my especially during the meet-and-greet ses- Flags Center, I immediately said “yes.” former career as a full-time mobile disc Cody Collins, the brand-new lead singer sion backstage, when my family was able As one of the biggest country acts of the jockey I played a number of country songs of the group (this Dubuque concert was to talk with and have their photo taken past decade, Lonestar is a multi-platinum enough times to involuntarily memorize his first-ever show with Lonestar), did with the country foursome. For one of her group famous for having more number- many of the lyrics. Yes, yes, but I’m still an awesome job with a heartfelt cover Christmas presents this year, my daughter one singles than another other musical not a big fan of country music. of Mark Cohn’s “Walking in Memphis,” says she wants an iTunes gift card so she group since the 1980s. though he was seriously off-key (“un- can purchase more country songs for her It’s not that I think this particular genre of amazing”) when the group performed growing music collection. I don’t really I quickly called my daughter to see if music stinks. I guess I just never fit into their hit song “Amazed.” Regardless, the want to further her interest in this genre she’d like to accompany me to the show. my rural Southern childhood environ- young women in the audience were too of music. But, then again, it’s a heckuva After her initial positive response, by the ment the way my siblings did. For exam- enamored with Cody’s Disney Channel lot cheaper than buying her a horse! ple, whenever I talk on the phone to my time the evening of the show arrived, youngest brother, Ben—a police officer Allie’s interest in the concert had waned. in Sumter, South Carolina—I often can After enjoying homemade tacos with her barely understand what he’s saying, due stepbrother and stepsister that evening, to his thick Southern twang. she seemed more content to play with model horses in her bedroom than en- Actually, when I was growing up down joy live country music at Five Flags Cen- South, people always asked if I was from ter. But by the time the concert actually the Midwest, because I didn’t have an ac- began, my wife and daughter and two cent at all. (I was born in New Jersey and grew up in Virginia and North Carolina, but had never been to the Midwest until I came here to go to college.) The reality is, the reason my column this week is about country music is because—for some reason known only to the Creator of the universe—my daughter Aletheia has re- cently become a big country music fan. I JUST WANT TO SWIM IN THAT VAT OF CANDY 25 DEC 13 - 26 will be host to the “Bond, James Bond” dinner dance, beginning at 8 p.m., with food stations, an open bar, a martini bar, a champagne toast and live music from The Bond Express. Reservations, $95, are re- quired, and can be made by calling 815- 777-5050. Spike’s Bar & Grill is hosting a DJ and a night of dancing from 9 p.m. to 1 a.m. For $10 per person, guests can enjoy a cash bar and free snacks. The catch? First come, first served, and the maximum ca- pacity is 200 people. Get there early and enjoy the night!

Continued from page 15 the bubbly? And over at Benjamin’s, at 103 N. Main, they’ll be importing Chicago band Ronny & the Rockits, a power blues,

Heading back to Dubuque, another down- town landmark will also be hosting a New Year’s celebration: Bricktown will host a soul and rock group, New Year’s Eve party in the Crystal for the evening. Both Room on the third floor of its complex New Year’s events at Third and Main Streets. Beginning have no cover charge with a cocktail hour and followed by and reservations are dinner, a blackjack hour and a cigar not required. smoke-off (that just sounds danger- ous), the night will be topped off with a show by Denver’s Dueling Pianos. Straight from the Mile High City, the act is making its first appearance in Dubuque. Previous dueling

piano shows at Bricktown have been smash successes, and this one is sure to not disappoint. Tickets are required; they’re $55 per person, and you can purchase tickets at Bricktown or online at www.etix.com. For And venturing just a little bit further east more information, call 563-582-0696. to the Galena Territory, the Eagle Ridge Resort & Spa invites guests to an elegant If the action in the Port of Dubuque is more evening in the ballroom, a fine dinner in towards your liking (and, hey, between Woodlands Restaurant and a New Year’s Stone Cliff Winery, Star Restaurant and the bash at Spike’s Bar & Gril, all on the luxu- Diamond Jo Casino, we can understand rious grounds of Eagle Ridge. The ballroom Continued on page 27 FRIENDS DON’T LET FRIENDS DEAL WITH IN-LAWS 26 DEC 13 - 26

so I was shocked when I heard my sister retell the following.

Out shopping one day, while my brother-in-law was at work, my sister received fantastic customer service from a very helpful store clerk. Helping her make selections, my sister had a pretty positive experience. It wasn’t until she returned later that evening with her African-American Black and White husband did Little Ms. Helpful turn As 2007 winds to a close, we can’t into a racist. Suddenly, she lost all help but look back and reflect on her customer service skills and upon where we have been and where we their departure, she demanded to are going. While acknowledging look through their shopping bag. (I accomplishments and setting fresh goals doubt it was to make sure they had for the New Year, we say goodbye to the everything.) old and ring in the new. We look back with fondness at the memories made I was absolutely appalled about my and let go of the not-so-productive sister’s experience, I was hurt for my moments. Tallying up the year’s events, family and embarrassed for that woman’s most of us have more successes than ignorance. Yet, admittedly, this shameful failures. From an individual perspective behavior happens every day. Although we’re probably cruising right along. my sister and her husband do not live Just as it is human nature to advance in Dubuque, I suspect this kind of and move forward, the decisions we attitude still remains. To further impose make affect our outcomes as success judgments about inter-racial marriage or failure. Sure, sometimes it is a one- further exacerbates the problem. step-forward, two-steps-back pace, However beyond my comprehension it but, we’re generally headed in the may be, to judge someone solely based right direction. Whether we are aware on physical attributes is a ridiculous of this or not our personal decisions behavior as old-fashioned as the horse reflect the larger community in which and buggy. we live. And since the citizens of the Tri-States are generally fair, nice When citizens of our All-America City and hardworking, well, we should be look back at 2007, it should be with pretty pleased with ourselves. So when pride. And while our city sure looks it comes to our fair city, what, if any, nice, I wonder if we have succeeded improvements need to be made? in one of the basic fundamentals of an evolving community: That of equal When I’m searching for answers to treatment regardless of one’s color, life’s quirky little questions, I turn religion or socio-economic status. I to one of my favorite people, my realize that experiences like that of sister. Not just because I know she my sister and her husband happen will always be home to take my call everywhere, however, it is when it hits (with her seven children), but because closer to home are we forced to cope she and my brother-in-law are truly with its existence. And so in 2008, I dignified souls. They live their lives will challenge myself and my fellow with the utmost integrity and honesty, citizens, to assume that everyone is not to mention unlimited patience. the kind and decent person we like to They are truly wonderful people and think we are. MOOSE IS NOT REALLY A MOOSE. WE PROMISE 27 DEC 13 - 26

For the country-in- clined among you, don’t w o r - ry, you’re not being left out in the cold! A special reservations-only, limit- ed-seating show by the Rick Tittle Band, beginning at 9 p.m., has your ticket for holiday fun! This is a special show, as Rick Tittle has announced that he will be scaling back to a limited booking schedule for the year of 2008 ... and, let’s face it: The Rick Tittle Band has been Continued from page 25 entertaining the Tri-State area for more why), Star Restaurant than 30 years, and & Ultra Lounge have if you’re a fan of your ticket. You are country music, their cordially invited to pickings are a great party like a rock star listen. This writer at the Ultra Lounge, was introduced to as two quickly rising the band when they Chicago acts come to opened for John An- town for a one-night- derson at the Five only engagement on Flags Theater earlier New Year’s Eve. Ga- this year, and they reth Woods, an Irish- were great. The Ea- transplanted acoustic gles Club is located at 1175 Century Road, and you can make reservations by calling 563-582-6498.

And, of course, every bar in the Tri-State area will welcome you on New Year’s Eve -- it’s one of the biggest nights of the year! Whether you decide to watch Mon- day Night Football at a sports bar like Lot One or Courtside, or you go musician, will begin the festivities at 9 hopping down Main p.m., followed by D.J. T-Cozie spinning Street, or you take a stroll down Central right into 2008. Come for dinner, stay for Avenue, or you go out for a nice dinner the party! Seating is limited and reserva- ... there will be no shortage of options tions are required, and you can make for you to spend New Year’s Eve. Have them by calling 563-556-4800. fun, be safe and we’ll see you in 2008!

For constantly updated and expanded NEW YEAR’S EVE event listings, log-on to DUBUQUE365.com and click on Nightlife! IS IT NATURAL TO BE ABLE TO BEND LIKE THAT? 28 DEC 13 - 26

mentary care here in the building.” Call Joel at 563-557-8977.

Continued from page 17 Yoga Web Design/ In addition to the various healing therapies Small Business Consulting offered by the group, the house is also host While in some ways Cathy Mauk’s Web site to a variety of yoga classes. While the Janu- design and small business consulting might ary schedule is likely to change from the not seem to fit in with the rest of the Heal- current schedule, the Dubuque Healing Arts ing Arts Group’s focus on holistic health, Group currently offers three different types her approach takes the integrative model of yoga practice at different times. Integral into the realm of business planning and Yoga with Joe Hartel is offered on Monday, marketing. Her company, eWEBTRIC, of- Wednesday and Saturday mornings. Eigen- fers Web site design and maintenance, Web berger hosts a Hatha Yoga class over the hosting solutions, computer training and lunch hours Monday, Wednesday and Fri- support, small business consulting, mar- day. Jim Earles leads a Kundalini Yoga class keting and office set-up – a great person to Thursday evenings. Check www.Dubuque- have around a house full of small business HealingArts.com for the current or January entrepreneurs. While she does help with schedule of classes. the marketing materials for the Healing Arts The Group has also hosted energy healing Group, Mauk can also help other would-be seminars, aromatherapy classes, and will small business owners get their ideas off the be offering pilates classes soon. Future ground. Call Cathy at 563-213-0873 or e- plans include the creation of an outdoor mail [email protected]. meditation garden, though looking out- side today, that might have to wait a bit. Chiropractic For now, everyone in the group seems Newest to the Healing Arts Group is chiro- happy to have found a home in a his- practor Dr. Joel Heer. While Heer lives in toric downtown house and excited about Dubuque, he has had a practice in Galena the potential of working together toward for 15 years. Heer will continue his Galena expanding the awareness and utiliza- practice but will add Tuesdays and Thurs- tion of healing arts and complementary days, from 10 a.m. to 6 p.m., at the Dubuque therapies in holistic health maintenance. Healing Arts Group beginning now in the Maybe most excited by the Dubuque middle of December. Heer offers traditional Healing Arts Group potential is founder chiropractic treatment or soft tissue tech- Elisa Eigenberger, to the point that she niques as an option. As a chiropractor, Heer might be a bit surprised how well the var- appreciates a more integrative approach to ious practitioners, teachers, and healers health maintenance, especially with other work well together: “The harmony within complementary treatment practitioners so the group is just amazing.” To learn more close at hand. “A lot of the structural things about the Dubuque Healing Arts Group, that I work with are manifestations of stress visit www.DubuqueHealingArts.com, e- that can exhibit themselves elsewhere,” he mail Elisa Eigenberger at elisa@dubuque- explains. “So it’s great to have the comple- healingarts.com, or call 563-588-1899. MOVIES ARE A DISH THAT IS BEST SERVED COLD ... IT IS VERY COLD IN THEATERS 29 DEC 13 - 26

Rotten Tomatoes collects the thoughts of dozens of movie reviewers across the country and averages their scores into a fresh or rotten rating. If a movie gets 60% or higher positive reviews, it is FRESH! THE BUZZ www.rottentomatoes.com - British star James Purefoy, best known for his roles in HBO’s Rome and the OPENING DURING THIS ISSUE original Resident Evil movie, is step- I Am Legend (12/14) ping into the shoes of Simon Templar: A man-made virus wipes out the entire The Saint. Pre-production has begun The Golden Compass population of New York City, leaving a vi- on a two-hour pilot film that produc- rologist (Will Smith) the last human survivor - A Film by Chris Weitz (About a Boy) ers hope will lead to a new television series. Pure- ... in possibly the entire world. He is being foy is stepping into a role that was first made truly In a world with witches, ice bears and daemons, a watched by nocturnal mutant victims of the plague, famous by James Bond actor Roger Moore, and was young girl named Lyra (Dakota Blue Richards) holds however, and time is running out, as they are cannibal- most recently portrayed by former Batman actor the key to preventing a group known as the Magiste- istic and he’s next on their menu. Will he find any other Val Kilmer. rium from controlling all of humanity. That key is The human survivors ... or die alone? Golden Compass and Lyra is perhaps the only person - Director Tim Burton, who has just that can read it. You see, if you can read The Golden Alvin & the Chipmunks (12/14) finished his adaptation of Stephen Compass, you can learn the truth, see what others A washed-up songwriter (Jason Lee), down Sondheim’s musical Sweeney Todd, wish to hide and potentially change future events. on his luck and in the dumps, adopts three For months, children have been disappearing, be- has announced that his next project chipmunks, Alvin, Simon and Theodore, ing taken by Goblers, never to be seen again. When will be an adaptation of Lewis Car- her uncle, Lord Asriel, embarks on a journey to the who show a remarkable aptitude for mu- roll’s Alice in Wonderland. Burton Arctic Circle to uncover the truth about a mysterious sic. In-between driving Dave nuts with their antics and indicates that he plans to stay close substance known as Dust, Lyra goes with the equally Dave’s romantic misfires, Alvin & the Chipmunks form to Carroll’s source material, which is full of surreal mysterious Mrs. Coulter (Nicole Kidman) and quickly a hit musical pop group. And Alvin wears a gangster imagery and characters. learns that she is not hoodie sweatshirt. Yes. who she claims to be. - Comedy actor Paul Rudd, famous for Lyra escapes with the National Treasure: Book of Secrets (12/21) his roles in such comedies as Anchor- aid of the Gyptians and One of the eighteen missing pages from man (he was Brian Fantana) and The with them forms an al- John Wilkes Booth’s diary has been found, 40-Year-Old Virgin, is set to star in the liance, which includes and it points to Ben Gates’ (Nicolas Cage) witches, ice bears and a Dreamworks comedy I Love You, Man. great-great-grandfather as a conspirator in Texas airman. A war is The story focuses on a man who his getting ready to brewing and the battle the assassination of Abraham Lincoln. Now, Gates seeks be married, though he doesn’t have a best man ... for their world and par- to find the President’s Book of Secrets. so he’s off to find a stranger for the part. Yeah. allel worlds supposedly accessible via this Dust Sweeney Todd (12/21) - Director John Singleton (Boyz n the will take them to places Based upon the wildly successful Stephen Hood) has stepped up to direct FOX’s they have only imag- Sondheim musical, Sweeney Todd follows big-screen adaptation of the 1980s ined. the title character as he returns to London classic television series, The A-Team. after escaping a life prison sentence, only Producers say the new iteration will be The Golden Compass is a visually interesting film to discover that his wife and daughter have updated from the Vietnam-era setting full of mystery, intriguing characters, exotic locales been tortured and made to suffer by the judge who had and strange machines. Dakota Blue Richards holds of the original story, based more on contemporary imprisoned him. After drawing upon the assistance of her own among some powerful adult actors such as politics, with the tone more along the lines of Die Craig and Kidman. The story is certainly unique but his former landlady, the insane Mrs. Lovett, Sweeney be- Hard and Lethal Weapon. the complicated nature of the multi-layered plotlines gans to hatch a plot for revenge that will ultimately find gives it a jumbled feel and, as a movie-goer, I felt as all of London the target of his barber’s razor. - Nickelodeon and Dreamworks have if I had missed several bits of vital information. It announced plans for a new, 26-epi- is almost as if the viewer walked into the middle of Charlie Wilson’s War (12/21) sode computer-animated comedy se- a movie trilogy. The interlaced plotlines never really “Good-Time Charlie” Wilson, a fun-loving ries titled The Penguins of Madagas- come together, but that is to be expected since this is Congressman from the piney woods of East car, based on the adventures of, well, the first of three adaptations of the book series. And, Texas, conspires with a rogue CIA operative the penguins from the film Madagas- yes, that means you can expect that you will be left and deftly operates the levers of power to car. King Julien of the Lemurs will also return in the hanging at the end of the film. The story ends at a funnel money and weapons to the Muja- point that makes some sense but it does leave the au- series, set to begin in 2009. hideen of Afghanistan following the Soviet invasion of dience wondering if the movie is actually over right before the credits roll. As with other movie trilogies, their country in late 1979. we may have to hold final judgment until the series Millennium Cinema concludes but, for now, The Golden Compass leaves 151 Millennium Drive something to be desired. Perhaps those who read NOW PLAYING IN DUBUQUE the books will have a greater appreciation for the big Bee Movie ...... 51% Rotten Platteville, WI screen adaptation. As someone who has not, this did Fred Claus ...... 23% Rotten 1-877-280-0211 or 608-348-4296 not live up to expectations. Hitman ...... 14% Rotten Beowulf ...... 70% Fresh 2835 NW Arterial, Avalon Cinema Mr. Magorium’s Emporium . . . 38% Rotten Dubuque 95 E Main St. 563-582-7827 Platteville, WI No Country for Old Men . . . . . 95% Fresh 608-348-5006 August Rush ...... 38% Rotten Carmike The Mist ...... 69% Fresh Cinema Center 8 Find great movie resources online at Enchanted ...... 93% Fresh 75 JFK, Dubuque, IA American Gangster ...... 79% Fresh 563-588-3000 Dubuque365.com BOB GELMS WAS A WILD AND CRAZY GUY ON WXRT 30 DEC 13 - 26 Bob’s Book Reviews was smoking crack one day and he set the Coffee & Send in the Clowns himself on fire. In a panic he ran from his Confusion. by Bob Gelms house, on fire. On the face of it this is a cat- He didn’t get astrophically horrible incident. He was in paid but he In my life there are four comedians who the hospital for a very long time with pain got valuable make me laugh so hard that whatever I beyond description. Richard’s comment experience. He happening to be drinking at that moment on the episode was, “I found out one thing talked about comes shooting out my nose. In no par- when you are running down the street on the club owner ticular order, they are Jonathon Winters, fire … people get out of your way.” How who saw some- Richard Pryor, Robin Williams and Steve could he translate such devastating pain thing in him … e-mail Bob: Martin. into something that is uproariously funny? not enough to pay [email protected] him but enough to Robin Williams is not dealing with reality let him have the stage for a night. in the same way as the rest of us. Maybe “Sylvia didn’t know very much about show he really is from Ork. His mind works business, having once told a ventriloquist like a laser, targeting the funniest aspects to move the dummy closer to the micro- of just about anything that happens to phone,” Martin writes. “She was, however, run through his experience and all at the savvy about the bottom line, as evidenced speed of light. How can he think of those by a sign in the kitchen that said: ANYONE things that quickly, and not just one thing GIVING MONEY TO JANIS JOPLIN BE- but a whole string of things in rapid fire FORE HER LAST SET IS FIRED!” like an automatic weapon? In researching this book Mr. Martin ran Steve Martin is in the same class with all across a radio DJ’s description of a visit these guys with one exception. He has Martin made to his show. Steve “launched the ability to actually tell us where all that into a monologue of what seemed like funny stuff comes from. At the time, he was sincere words of friendship.” the most successful comedian of all time and he has the presence of mind to actually ‘Sonny, you know, I’ve listened to you know how it all happened, sometimes with for years, and I really feel like you’ve be- hindsight, sometimes as it happened. Born come my friend. I feel like I can ask you Standing Up answers obvious questions this question.’ like what’s up with the white suit, the ar- row through the head, “excuuuuuuse me,” ‘Sure, Steve, you can ask me anything.’ This piece is about Steve Martin’s newly happy feet, and a wild and crazy guy. published memoir on his years as a stand- ‘What time is it?’” up comedian, called Born Standing Up. Like anyone who wants a career in show I’m laughing my ass off -- you will too! In a way, though, it’s about all of them. business badly enough this book gives They all do something that most entertain- testimony to the dedication, sacrifice, ment people would consider the hardest and heartache that is required for success, thing to do in the entertainment world ... so much so that all successful people at they make people laugh. Not in the way some time wonder if it was all worth it. of most comics who tell jokes with a set- Steve Martin decided it wasn’t and in up and then a punch line. These guys and 1981 stopped doing stand-up forever. He others like them create barrels of mirth walked away from the most lucrative con- from real life. They tell stories about real cert career in the history of stand-up. life and then bend it a little bit. Between then and now, of course, he has When I was a little boy I seem to remember carved out a place on the stage, in televi- that Jonathon Winters had a TV show, and sion and in movies. He has written plays, one of the elements of the show had to do movies, novels, short stories, and he is a regular contributor to the New Yorker. with a huge table of all kinds of weird props that Mr. Winters had not seen in advance. Mr. Martin’s comic persona was honed He then improvised using the props, wreak- early on. He says, “I did stand-up com- ing havoc with me and, I assume, everyone edy for eighteen years. Ten of those years else who was watching. I always thought to were spent learning, four years were myself, how does he do that? Where does spent refining, and four were spent in his brain go to find stuff that funny? wild success.” Sill, he was described as an overnight success. One of Richard Pryor’s shows on DVD has two bits on it that are nothing short of as- He is able to describe with intimate detail tonishing. Pryor got most of his material and great insight how that comic persona from his own life. During one bit he re- was developed and appeared fully formed enacts his own heart attack while having in the late ‘70s. This book is a man looking a conversation with God. It’s absolutely back on a part of his life he ignored for a hysterical. During the other he talks about long time. It’s an affectionate look back and an incident in his life that had him in the a funny one as well. In the ‘60s he got an deepest throes of addiction to crack. He early break at a club in San Francisco called PUZZLES? NO THANKS, MY BRAIN IS FULL. 31 DEC 13 - 26 WELCOME TO OUR ALL NEW TIME-KILLING 365 PUZZLE PAGE

SUDOKU TRI-DOKU

1. The numbers 1-9 must be placed in each of the NINE LARGE triangles. 2. The numbers 1-9 must be placed in the three legs of the OUTERMOST triangle. 3. The numbers 1-9 must be placed in the three legs of the INVERTED INNER triangle. 4. No two neighboring (touching) cells may contain the same number.

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All puzzles @2007 King Features Synd., Inc. ANSWERS TO ALL PUZZLES ARE ON THE NEXT PAGE - THAT’S RIGHT, NO WAITING ... YOU BIG CHEATER! BIG NO WAITING ... YOU RIGHT, - THAT’S ANSWERS TO NEXT PAGE ALL PUZZLES ARE ON THE World Rights Reserved. MEGA I WAS ONCE ASSAULTED BY TRIXIE KITSCH AND NEVER EVEN MET THE LADY! 32 DEC 13 - 26

PUZZLE ANSWERS from page 27 Dr. Skrap’s completely useless Sudoku Tri-Doku

Dear Trixie: HOROSCOPES I was robbed downtown last month and was so freaked out I didn’t leave my apartment for three weeks. The only ARIES If your loved one does not speak up and tell you what way I was able to go back to work was that I bought they want for Christmas, it is acceptable for you to get them a small pistol and I carry it with me everywhere. I’ve prac- something you really wanted. Or, at least, I hope it is. ticed at the shooting range and am pretty accurate although I’m not sure how well I would do if I ever have to shoot at TAURUS Remember that you don’t always need to be super- Cryptoquip actual human beings. What can I do? --V for Victim nice and always going out of your way to do special things for your significant other. Just don’t get grumpy when your Dear Victim: request for your eighth back rub of the night is answered with Don’t think of them as human beings -- think of them as dishes flying towards the general vicinity of your head. useless paper targets. Crossword GEMINI Many Dubuquers tend to put chains on their car’s Dear Trixie: tires at the sight of a single snowflake. Don’t be one of those I like tequila. I like it in coke or orange juice or straight people. By all means, prove Darwin right and zoom down out of the bottle. My wife says I come home drunk and act Highway 20 at 70 miles an hour in a Fiero. Just make sure mean. She says I throw stuff around the aapartment and there’s a video camera to record your last moments for beat her up. I honestly don’t ever remember busting up any- YouTube. thing or hitting her. She says she thinks I am an alcoholic. Do you think I have a drinking problem? What am I doing wrong? --Jose Cuervo CANCER Chicken wings are calling you ... the Bears will be on Monday Night Football ... hey, sounds like a recipe Dear Jose: for a great night, right? Well, until they lose and you OD on Yes, you have a drinking problem. You are not drinking chicken wings. Let it go ... the aftermath of the next morning nearly enough. If you were drinking the proper amount just isn’t worth it. Even Exchange of tequila you’d be unconscious in a ditch and unable to wreck your house or hit your wife. Better luck next time. LEO Dirty clothes do not magically become clean just be- cause they’ve sat at the bottom of the pile for two months. Dear Trixie: I am having a fancy dinner party. I will be using my mother’s VIRGO Wendy’s offers the Baconator sandwich. This is an silver and my grandmother’s fine linens. How are formal insult to your entire existence. Be who you were meant to be. linen napkins folded? --Kris N. You are the master of bacon investigation and elimination. Mega You are the Baconator. Baconate that silly sandwich. Maze Dear Kris: With the hands. LIBRA Blast excessively loud pop music from your home ste- reo when you randomly feel like it. If your neighbors com- Dear Trixie: plain, tell them that you’re simply listening to the instructions I have been in love with my girlfriend for three years. I of Elvis Costello, and that if you have indeed pumped it up to would do anything for her. I have put up with her cheating the point where they can feel it, you’ve done your job. on me and the humiliation that comes with the whole town knowing how gullible I am. I took her back and forgave her SCORPIO As frustration mounts this holiday season, between and now she told me she wants to break up with me. I can’t work, family and everything else between ... when the time seem to get over her dumping me. I cry all the time and my comes, don’t be afraid to snap. Go to a hotel, grab two pack- THE ANSWERS Questions on Page 6 chest hurts. How can I get over this pain? --Heartbroken ets of hot cocoa mix, and fall to your knees, cursing the world 1) D; Doobie drummer Ed Toth drummed for Vertical Horizon until 2005. Dear Heartbroken: with packets clenched in your fists. Just because. I always felt better if I could break something of his that he 2) A; Reiki practice dates to a Buddhist valued. Like his clavicle. SAGITTARIUS Order taco pizza from Happy Joe’s for your monk in 1922. company’s Christmas party. It’s just zesty enough that anyone 3) C; gluhwein translates to “glowing Dear Trixie: can eat it ... and when your boss grabs a piece, you can spike wine.” My vegetarian friends have invited me to a potluck. We are it with Tabasco sauce. That poor sap. That’ll show him to take 4) The Golden Compass is the first part of all supposed to bring a dish. What goes with soy tofu and away your stapler. the His Dark Materials trilogy. hummus? --Bob 5) Steve Martin’s career began as a magician CAPRICORN Instead of preparing for your big presentation at Disneyland. Dear Bob: to a huge client next week, why not take a vacation in the 6) B; the calendar that ends on December Vomit? Bahamas? Sure, you won’t get the contract ... but you might 31 is the Gregorian calendar. have failed anyway. Just saying. Dear Trixie: 7) D; 25 percent of American personal spending takes place during the holiday The roommate I was assigned has turned out to be a born- AQUARIUS Listening to the Doobie Brothers does not mean shopping season. again Christian. I can’t turn around without her trying to you should begin smoking a doob. Wait for your buddy to do convert me. What can I do to get her to move out? --Cool 8) B; the New Year’s crystal ball in Times it, and then mooch from him. Square weighs 1,070 pounds. College Girl 9) The current Diamond Jo features High- PISCES The next time your annoying male co-worker just Dear Cool Girl: Steaks, the Lighthouse Grill and the Dia- won’t shut up with the story of his latest escapades in Las Ve- mond Deli. And they’re all good. Try taking the Lord’s name in vain while having sex in her gas, simply turn to him and inform him, “Good sir, in the day bed. If that doesn’t work then go with the old standard: 10) FALSE! According to VISA, the Saturday of chimanzees, I was a monkey.” He’ll either leave, or believe Crack smoking and loaning her clothes to friends. Ah, the before Christmas Eve is the busiest shopping you have butane in your veins. memories of my college days. day of the year. WE’LL SEE YOU AT THE TABLES ... OR THE THEATER ... OR THE LANES ... AT THE JO! 33 DEC. 13 - 26

– it all adds up to er existing Port amenities like the Grand bie Brothers’ America’s River Festival con- an entertainment Harbor Resort and Waterpark, Stone Cliff cert this summer is any indicator, they’ll be destination.” Winery, and Star Restaurant in the histor- going to see the band in the intimate theater ic Star Brewery. But the potential impact named for one of their biggest songs. Already a key com- doesn’t stop at the Port. ponent of Amer- ica’s River Phase Moyer points to the project’s potential in II, the entertain- the broader tourism market and how the ment complex cre- Mississippi Moon could draw music fans ates an even better from a wider radius to Dubuque. Hav- fit with partners ing a signature music theater in the mix like the Smithson- of downtown live music venues sets the ian-affiliated -Na stage, if you will, for a more vibrant overall tional Mississippi music scene. “This entire entertainment River Museum and complex will draw people to Dubuque,” Continued from page 5 Aquarium and oth- says Swain. “Music fans will come to see concerts by their favorite bands and real- observes, “In some markets, the audi- ize that Dubuque has great shops, great ence for live music skews to a younger restaurants, great nightlife, and a thriving demographic, but in this area there’s live music scene.” a broader base for live music that cuts across multiple generations.” Moyer echoes the point, “We’re ex- cited to see more growth in downtown In addition to booking a wide variety of Dubuque,” he notes, regarding expand- national touring acts – classic rock, adult ing shopping, restaurant, and nightlife contemporary, jazz, country, etc. – the options. “All these things make Dubuque Mississippi Moon will also host perfor- more of a destination.” mances by area bands giving greater ex- posure to local acts. “Through this venue That’s a good thing for both casinos, and we are certainly cognizant of the local a wide variety of tourism and entertain- The Diamond Jo Casino is no stranger to music scene and hope to enhance what ment-based businesses. Understanding the is already going on,” said Moyer, “We’re hosting great live music. They regularly psychology of attraction, Moyer adds, in sponsor music festivals throughout the com- not just building a casino. With the the- simple, straightforward terms, “People go munity and have hosted incredible concerts ater, the bowling alley, the restaurants portside from Joan Jett and America, to Lee where people go.” If attendance at the Doo- Greenwood and Herman’s Hermits. COMEDY IS A FULL-CONTACT SPORT 34 DEC 13 - 26

edy clubs, not to mention his work on TV and in films. Sweeney has appeared on HBO’s Comedy Central. Newspapers Stefano across the country are raving about him. So come on down to Bricktown and find out for yourself. STEFANO JASON RUSSELL Friday & Saturday, Dec. 14 & 15, 9 PM Wednesday, December. 26, 9 PM Arthur House, Platteville, WI Bricktown Entertainment Complex Back to Wisconsin for the holidays - Ste- Jason’s style of comedy is silly, hard hit- fano is a MUST-SEE act. Don’t miss this ting, and real. His strong personality, high incredible show; if you love the Muppets energy, and quick sense of humor enables Christmas you’ll be in for a great treat! him to handle any situation. Jason has performed with Martin Lawrence, from BENGT WASHBURN the TV series Martin, and Tommy David- Friday & Saturday, Dec. 21 & 22, 9 PM son from In Living Color. A must see per- Arthur House, Platteville, WI formance ...GUARANTEED laughter! Winner of the San Francisco internation- al comedy competition and heard on Bob & Tom! Bengt (pronounced “bent”) Wash- RON FEINGOLD burn is a self-proclaimed “unaccom- plished Mormon.” A favorite in comedy Wednesday, December 19, 9 PM clubs across the nation, Bengt presents Bricktown Entertainment Complex a fresh perspective on the world as seen You have heard him on Bob & Tom & through the eyes of a small town Mormon you can see him LIVE at Bricktown. Mark THE BARSTOOL SPORTSMEN boy gone slightly awry. tours all over the country playing at com- Saturday, December 29, 9 PM Arthur House, Platteville, WI They’re the guys sitting around on a bar- stool at the local watering hole telling about the one that got away ... again. www.barstoolsportsmen.com.

DENVER’S DUELING PIANO’S Wednesday, December 31, 9 PM Bricktown Entertainment Complex Direct from Denver, it’s the comedy and music of Denver’s Dueling Pianos first time in Dubuque on the best night of the year ... NEW YEAR’S EVE! Get advance tickets to the show at ETIX.com.

“LAUGH TOUR 2008!” Combining the Funny & Fantastic! Friday, January 11, 2008, 8 p.m. Five Flags Theater, Tix: $19.50, $17.50 Join us for a spectacular evening of comedy with Vince Carone, Tyron Fos- ton, Steve Mul- cahy and head- lined by Mark Faje. More information available online at N i c k L u l l o . c o m or see page 7.