Fat tyre pirates If you’re bored with riding or driving to find the best trails, a boat cruise along the might be just the freshener you’re looking for Words and pics Dan Milner

68 Mountain Biking uk Fat tyre pirates

Bikes, check. Shorts, check. Pirate flag – hell yeah!

squint through a tiny to the mountain bike mecca of Fort windscreen spattered with William and back in a week is, rain and wind-blown spray, according to the boat charter and try to steer my craft company, challenge enough for any through the gale. Right in my family holiday, but to put ashore to line of sight sit four bikes ride too is land-lubber optimism and I peer between grimy gone mad. It’s ambitious but chainrings so that I don’t doable I opine, although ‘sedately inadvertently drive a hundred paced’ won’t come into it. thousand quid’s worth of On board are fellow poopdeck posh boat onto unforgiving swabbers Fraser McNeil, Tadj rocks. “If we go down,” I think, Henry and Sophie Wardlaw, all “shouldI I save the Mojo HD, or just hardy locals who laugh in the face swim for it?” I hope the boat of Scottish hoolies, or at least they company has good insurance. would if their feet were atop a pair Our bike ‘roadtrip’ is a little of flats and their helmet peaks different. We’ve swapped the Costa pointing down incredibly steep and coffee-and-muffin overload and slippery trails. As we steer out into congestion of the M6 with a the open expanse of Loch Ness – sedately paced week-long cruise the UK’s largest volume of fresh across . Sailing the 95km water – and into the full brunt of a Caledonian Canal from Inverness force 4 westerly wind that is

Mountain Biking uk 69 Having Joe Barnes along was a bonus, but even without him you can find classic trails like this one along the River Arkaig to ride

We follow a track that leads us into winding, wet-root strewn singletrack then on to a river crossing

70 Mountain Biking uk Bike-cruising

ploughing the peat-coloured trails dotting our OS map gale that drives us to shelter at water into frothing white tops, towards the western end of Loch Drumnadrochit for our first night my crew appear noticeably Ness. When I conjured up this has blown any fauna flotsam to uncomfortable. I seek to quell idea of touring Scotland’s rugged the loch’s edge, where it lies their looks of early mutiny by but rideable interior by boat, I strewn across the shoreline. telling them I am a fully qualified envisaged mooring up of an In the shadow of the 13th powerboat skipper. To my evening, sitting on deck enjoying century Urquhart Castle, we dismay, their expressions of a glass of Pinot Noir while otters moor for the night and spread angst do not change. play in the loch waters that lap our OS map across the table in lazily against the boat’s hull. By the galley. With our bikes ranged Westward ho! chance, the week that is assigned on the deck we’re already Time and tide wait for no man for our aquatic adventure is in standing out from the other apparently, so we pass up the mid-October. Fresh snow caps boaters, who are mostly about 40 worthy local trails of Inverness to the lumpy peaks around us and years our senior. This distinction make good our escape, having there’s not an otter to be seen, is cemented by the hoisting of a picked out a couple of natural leaving me to assume that the Jolly Roger by Tadj within 20 minutes of leaving the boat company’s marina. The pirate flag and rack of muddy bikes on deck ensure our 12m cruiser becomes the most tourist- photographed boat in Scotland. In truth the OS maps are not jam-packed with trails, but a few do stand out. With the storm persisting, we slip our moorings early next morning to steam to Loch Oich, the highest point along the canal. Here we have a short out-and-back lined up along the banks of the River Garry. Sailing while it’s stormy The bikes obscure lets us save time for longer rides our view through the boat’s window a little... in the better weather that’s forecast later. We underestimate the time needed to navigate Fort Unloading for our first Augustus’ impressive staircase of ride along the banks five lock gates, and we amuse of the Garry ourselves during the 90 minutes it takes the Captain Ahab- bearded lock-keeper to see us through with repeated raiding parties to the lock-side

essentials How, when and how much? Boat charter is easy, with no Cruisers (caleycruisers.com) previous boat handling offer boats suitable for two, experience needed (you are four, six or eight people, all given two hours’ instruction of which are fully equipped on arrival) and, while winds with fridges, hot showers, can be an issue on exposed on-board heating and Loch Ness, there are no tidal bedding. Prices for a We finally find our land waters to navigate. one-week charter start at legs and then put them to A week-long cruise allows £512 per week for a work turning the cranks you plenty of time to marvel four-berth boat, plus fuel. at the scenery between The boating period is from Inverness and Fort William, the end of March until late letting you get away from the October. Summer offers long hustle and bustle of life while days (up to 18 hours’ riding leaving enough time to ride time) but also clouds of several trails en route. midges. April and September Inverness-based Caley can be the perfect balance.

Mountain Biking uk 71 bike-cruising A little autumn damp keeps the riding lively, but we always had a warm floating hotel to return to afterwards

We pedal up the side of the River Arkaig, mushing our way through boggy sphagnum moss

chippy to ward off scurvy. Days ship’s rations, warmed by the are short in October, and by the glow that only a combination of a It really is this time we moor up at Invergarry fast, wet ride and a shot of ship’s pretty and tranquil jetty we risk riding into dusk, booze can instil. but none of the crew need facts and figures persuading to don their riding kit Land ahoy! and pedal ashore. With the weather improving we We crank up one side of the sail out of Loch Oich, along the The Caledonian Canal river, following a track that leads narrow two-mile section of Stretching for 100km and For 22 miles the canal is us into winding, wet-root strewn Laggan Avenue to reach Gairlochy linking together five natural part of the 230m-deep Loch singletrack to a river crossing. Locks at the western end of the lochs, the Caledonian Canal Ness – the largest body of Stopping to take in the beauty of inventively named . opened in 1822 and took 19 fresh water in the UK, holding the tumbling river, we each sway Here we have arranged to meet years to construct. Lock more fresh water than all the from the influence of 24 hours local Joe Barnes, who has a couple gates at each end separate lakes of England and Wales on the water. Luckily, as the of rides up his muddy sleeve. the fresh water from the put together. Castles, many return leg becomes a Remnants of the first wintry North Sea and Atlantic of them ruined during the rollercoaster ride of steep, snows convince us that the Ocean, with the canal 18th century Jacobite slippery drop downs and flowing planned big loop behind the draining both east and west uprising, dot the landscape singletrack, our landlubber 850m-high Meall na Teanga peak from its 35m high point at and peaks rise to 800m on balance returns when we begin with its hefty descent back down Loch Oich. either side of the canal. mashing the cranks. We ride to the loch side might not be right to the boat and onto the ideal, and instead we pedal up the slippery jetty just as the last side of the River Arkaig, mushing gasp of daylight is swallowed by our way through boggy sphagnum Kaig Falls, a tumble of foaming river darkness, reload our bikes on moss and winding up through a that slices a three-step set of cliffs, deck and settle down to some beech forest. It’s one of the most before we grunt up one of the beautiful trails I have ever seen steepest climbs I hope to ever and the damp that is rapidly attempt. “This is one of our edging its way through the seat of singlespeed challenges,” quips Joe, a my shorts is easily forgotten. We rider who has way too much ability continue by way of the impressive in all disciplines of mountain

72 Mountain Biking uk bike-cruising We nip onto one of Joe’s ‘secret’ trails, a vertical ribbon of brown carved from a carpet of green moss

We found the north face Ben Nevis trail one of the best natural out- and-backs in the area

biking. I look down at my 22/36t Caledonian Canal into the sea set-up and cry a little inside. At 19m below, and mark the limit of the end of our climb we pop out our cruising area. Mooring up at onto open hillside and into Locks we set ourselves sunshine, where we snack on Clif up for a big day out – a beautiful Bars until the roar of randy out-and-back ride to the north rutting stags echoes a bit too face of Ben Nevis. The weather is close for comfort and we head on our side and short sleeves back to the safety of our ship. emerge as we pedal up the steep Following Joe, we leave the climb that will bring us to the Big open moorland and plenty to play on is what obvious track behind and nip natural trail beneath Britain’s makes this Scotland onto one of his ‘secret’ trails, a highest peak. Water channels dot vertical ribbon of brown carved the outward leg with puncture- out from a carpet of green moss. risking challenges, but they also need to know We rejoin the established add a dozen fun jumps to the singletrack in time to pass return descent. Bonnie Prince Charlie’s cave – As the trail tightens and spirals the canal’s best riding his alleged hideout from 18th impossibly upwards towards century English invaders after his Carn Dearg Meadhonach, we stop Unless you’re tackling the Kaig Falls and up behind defeat at the Battle of Culloden - to take in the view. Behind us is Great Glen trail, which Meall na Teanga on the north and roll down switchbacks to the the mighty Ben Nevis, and in parallels the 100km side of Loch Lochy, dropping edge of the loch for a pedal back front of us the crinkle-edged Caledonian Canal end to end, back down to the loch side along the road to our mooring at west coast of Scotland. It’s good day rides are to be had and returning via the Great Moy Swing Bridge. It has been a spectacular. We’re four days into along the canal’s route. While Glenn Way path. There is also long, tiring day and galley duties our odyssey and will manage to not exactly mooring at the riding on the south side of are shunned in favour of a flat squeeze in a couple more short trailhead, many trails are Loch Ness from Foyers via pedal along the canal side to Fort rides on the sail back to accessible from the specified Inverfarigaig (10km loop) and William and its treasure trove of Inverness, one of which will see boat mooring locations. a 9km, 535m climb/descent curry houses. Sophie fall and break her hand. We rode fun, natural trails loop from the Drumnadrochit The next day we reach the But for the moment we have shown on OS maps up the mooring to the top of Meall mighty Neptune’s Staircase, a found our bounty – a 10km River Tarff (Fort Augustus/ Fuar-mhonaidh, the highest flight of eight locks that dump singletrack descent back to Fort Loch Ness), Invergarry (Loch peak above Loch Ness on the the western end of the William and the comfort of a Oich), Gairlochy/ north shore. posh boat. No traffic jams, no (Loch Lochy) and the north Thanks to Scotland’s open Costa Coffee stops. “Sometimes face Ben Nevis trail near access policy, you can also roadtrips just need a fresh Torlundy (Fort William/ check the walker’s website approach,” I think, and push my Bonavie Locks). For a big day, (www.walkhighlands.co.uk) try riding from Gairlochy to for more possibilities. right crank forward. c

74 Mountain Biking uk