91474 Sample Assessment Schedule

NCEA Level 3 English 91474 (3.3) — page 1 of 7

SAMPLE ASSESSMENT SCHEDULE English 91474 (3.3): Respond critically to significant aspects of unfamiliar written texts through close reading, supported by evidence Assessment Criteria

Achievement Achievement with Merit Achievement with Excellence Respond critically to significant Respond critically and convincingly Respond critically and aspects of written texts through to significant aspects of unfamiliar perceptively to significant aspects close reading includes making written texts through close reading, of unfamiliar written texts through evaluative interpretations and supported by evidence includes close reading, supported by judgements about significant making discerning, informed critical evidence includes making aspects of texts, such as: responses to specified aspects. sophisticated and insightful or  ideas (e.g. themes, original critical responses to attitudes, beliefs, experiences, significant aspects integrated with feelings, insights, meanings, accurate and relevant evidence. It opinions, thoughts, and may include explaining how understandings within the text) significant aspects of texts communicate ideas about  language features (e.g. contexts, such as human word choice, syntax, sound experience, society and the wider devices) world.  structure (e.g. part text, whole text, narrative sequence beginnings and endings) as used for particular audiences and purposes, in terms of meanings and effects created, supported by accurate and relevant evidence.

Evidence Statement

Expected coverage – Question One NØ No response; no relevant evidence. The candidate does not identify a tone but may give an example of a language technique N1 OR may identify a tone but does not give any language technique. Not Achieved The candidate:  identifies a tone in the narrative N2  may give an example of a language technique but may be a tenuous link to the identified tone or attitude. Achievement A3 The candidate:  identifies some development in tone or attitude of the writer and gives an example of at least TWO valid language techniques  makes a relevant comment about how the language techniques are effective in expressing the tone or attitude of the writer towards her ‘homeplace’. Eg, the writer moves from scientific detail using words like ‘diameter’ in an instructive tone to the end where it is more reflective – “None of my homeplaces do that”. NCEA Level 3 English 91474 (3.3) — page 2 of 7

The candidate:  identifies some development in tone or attitude of the writer and gives an example of at least TWO valid language techniques A4  makes a relevant comment about how the language techniques are effective in expressing the tone or attitude of the writer towards her ‘homeplace’. Eg, the writer employs scientific detail in an instructive and authoritative tone in contrast to the end where it is more reflective – “But I never expect it to stay exactly the same”. The candidate:  traces the development in tone or attitude of the writer and gives an example of at least TWO valid language techniques  presents a valid and detailed discussion of how the technique is effective in M5 expressing the tone or attitude of the writer towards her homeplace  demonstrates a convincing awareness of the shift in tone. Eg, the writer employs scientific detail in an instructive and authoritative tone in contrast to the nostalgic tone she uses when she employs personal pronouns to draw us in to her childhood – “We held grimly to a crack or a ledge”.

Merit The candidate:  traces the development in tone or attitude of the writer and gives an example of at least TWO valid language techniques  presents a valid, detailed, AND discerning critical discussion of how the technique is effective in expressing the tone or attitude of the writer towards her M6 homeplace  demonstrates a convincing awareness of the shift in tone. Eg, the writer employs scientific detail in an instructive and authoritative tone in contrast to the nostalgic tone she uses when she employs personal pronouns and colourful words like ‘thrill / screaming’ and colloquial phrases like ‘sort of’ as she talks about her own childhood there. Excellence E7 The candidate:  traces the development in tone or attitude of the writer and gives an example of at least TWO valid language techniques  presents an insightful and discerning critical discussion of how the technique is effective in expressing the tone or attitude of the writer towards her homeplace  demonstrates an integrated and perceptive awareness of the shift in tone that in turn acknowledges the maturation of the writer. Eg, the writer employs scientific detail in an instructive and authoritative tone and moves through in a kind of chronological order from the nostalgic tone she uses when she employs personal pronouns and colourful words like ‘thrill / screaming’ and colloquial phrases like ‘sort of’as she talks about her own childhood there and comes to a final awareness as an adult. NCEA Level 3 English 91474 (3.3) — page 3 of 7

The candidate:  identifies some development in tone or attitude of the writer and gives an example of at least TWO valid language techniques  presents an insightful, sophisticated and discerning critical discussion of how the technique is effective in expressing the tone or attitude of the writer towards her homeplace E8  demonstrates an integrated and perceptive awareness of the shift in tone that in turn acknowledges the maturation of the writer. Eg, the writer’s tone gently chides those who she thinks take a simplistic approach to Moeraki, a place she loves, but progresses through in an authoritative tone even showing her awareness of the scientific background behind the rock formations using scientific detail. The writer shows an awareness and acceptance of life changing yet she embraces it and revels in it.

Note: Answers are judged holistically, not solely on the basis of evidence included in the schedule. Language features that may be referred to at any level include:

 Contrasts: Blank stare / bright smile demonstrating the gently chiding tone towards those who think they know her ‘homeplace’.  Minor sentences: Well not quite develops a conversational tone.  Parenthesis: There are dozens of them (there used to be hundreds, but all of the accessible smaller ones have been souvenired), round and weird ... The beloved Black Bach that I look after – and it is most likely to take that crib first, because it is southernmost on the beach – well so be it. Note: The parenthesis creates a conversational tone, which is also reflective but forward looking. Gives the sense that she’s the expert.  Long vowel sounds: Round and weird and looming – nostalgic tone, the perspective of a child comes through.  Use of personal pronouns: As children we went ... none of us were ever game...we held grimly – establishing a nostalgic tone.  Post modifiers: The mussels, those stubby fat blueback southern kutae – nostalgic or positive tone.  Triad/Triple construction: Things change: things erode: things go establishes the appreciation of time moving on, resigned yet optimistic if linked to the last line and the penultimate line where the writer tells us she received “strength and energy and love form it”  Consonance: Rocks...Tikoraki...kaik...cracked.  Direct speech: ‘Shoulda put concrete on them years ago...” – amused.  Metaphors: The ‘dance of change’; ‘the standing place of my heart’ – nostalgic but also appreciative and forward looking.  Use of Māori language: kutae/turangawaewae-ngakau/Moeraki – awareness of her audience as most words have a context that non-Māori speakers can catch on to.  Exclamatory quotations: ‘O yes! That’s where the boulders are’ – mildly amused or chiding those who do not know her ‘homeplace’.  Scientific detail: Septarian concretion, yellow calcite crystals, – tone of the expert, authoritative.

Expected coverage – Question Two Not Achieved NØ No response; no relevant evidence. NCEA Level 3 English 91474 (3.3) — page 4 of 7

The candidate recognises a mood in the poem but does not give examples of techniques N1 or a correct technique OR may give a technique but does not correctly identify a mood in the poem. The candidate shows awareness of mood(s) and gives a correct technique OR the N2 candidate accurately recognises the mood of the poem but the technique might have tenuous link to the mood The candidate:  provides a straightforward discussion of the mood(s) of the poem A3  begins to explain how it is established by relevant examples  may identify more than one mood evident in the poem but may take the discussion through on one only. Achievement The candidate:  provides a clear, developed discussion of the mood(s) of the poem A4  accurately explains how the mood is established by relevant examples  may identify more than one mood evident in the poem but may take the discussion through on one only. The candidate:  provides a convincing and informed discussion of the mood(s) of the poem M5  presents the explanation with confident, clear and valid examples  may identify more than one mood evident in the poem but may take the discussion through on one only.

Merit The candidate:  provides a convincing and discerning discussion of the mood of the poem confidently linking the mood(s) to the ideas of the poet M6  presents a valid and detailed discussion of the effect created, supported by relevant examples  may identify more than one mood evident in the poem but may take the discussion through on one only. The candidate:  provides a perceptive discussion of the mood of the poem confidently linking the mood(s) to the ideas of the poet E7  presents an integrated discussion of the effect(s) created, supported by relevant examples; there will be a sense that connections are being made across the poem  may identify more than one mood evident in the poem but may take the discussion through on one only. Excellence The candidate:  provides a perceptive discussion of the mood(s) of the poem and may explain how the poem reveals or communicates ideas about the human experience or the wider world E8  presents an integrated discussion of the effect(s) created, supported by relevant examples; there will be a sense that connections are being made across the poem  may identify more than one mood evident in the poem but may take the discussion through on one only. Moods might include, but will not be limited to:  lonely  nostalgic NCEA Level 3 English 91474 (3.3) — page 5 of 7

 sentimental  wistful  ghostly  haunting  unsettling  appreciative  imaginative overall.

The explanation of effects may include:  how the writer uses language to create a mood  how the mood helps to tell us what the poet feels and why  how the writer uses the poem’s mood to create a response in the reader about the poem’s subject matter / theme / ideas.

Note: Answers are judged holistically, not solely on the basis of evidence included in the schedule.

Language features that may be referred to at any level include:  Compounding: ‘wraith-like’ – the sense of the physical environment being ghostly and haunting.  Alliteration: ‘taste on my tongue’; ‘dust and diesel’ – harshness suggesting loneliness / ghostliness. miners’ cottages pale as mushrooms in the mist – soft sound linking ideas together suggesting loneliness, nostalgia for old times. fantastical and floating – unsettling / ghostly / haunting. playground of a primary school – nostalgic.  Sibilance (or Scales that tilt towards injustice / fantastical / Some surreal craft now cast adrift – alliteration): linking of the sibilant sounds provides an unsettling mood.  Listing: a war memorial hall with a padlocked front door/the sour taste on my tongue of a dust and diesel railway station/miners’ cottages pale as mushrooms in the mist/a seesaw in the playground of a primary school.  Simile: miners’ cottages pale as mushrooms in the mist – ghostly / unsettling / nostalgic. a seesaw...like scales that tilt towards injustice – lonely / resigned / wistful. its streetlights like a gorse bloom’s yellow carnival – nostalgic / positive.  Metaphor: the topsy-turvy of its history down a surface cross threaded and riddled with mysteries – ghostly / unsettling / nostalgic. Lost in the enchantment of an ancient entertainment – ghostly / unsettling / nostalgic / appreciative. Coal black waters voyaging this corridor of stars – ghostly / unsettling / nostalgic / appreciative. Dad with his pockets full of fancy – nostalgic / wistful / positive. the town’s wake of champagne corks and ribbons – nostalgic / appreciative / wistful / positive. waiting ... as Huntly floats downstream – ghostly / unsettling / nostalgic.  Run-on question: Do I merely chance to catch...Mum laughing as he murmurs something? – nostalgic / ghostly / unsettling / positive.  Pre-modification: A wraith-like old wooden two-storey hotel – unsettling build up of images. NCEA Level 3 English 91474 (3.3) — page 6 of 7

 Appeal to the senses: The sour taste on my tongue of a dust and diesel railway station – nostalgic / unsettling.  Allusion to a midsummer night’s dream – nostalgic, ghostly, unsettling, positive. Shakespeare:  Internal ‘Just keep Enchantment / ancient / entertainment – linking the idea of nostalgia / loneliness / internal rhyme and sentimentality. ignore feminine rhyme’

Expected coverage – Question Three NØ No response; no relevant evidence. Candidate does not discuss a clear sense of the nature of time or the notion of time Not Achieved N1 passing. A sense of the nature or notion of time is mentioned but no reference to text evidence is given N2 Candidate describes time in one of the texts with tenuous reference to text evidence. The candidate:  provides a straightforward discussion of time as it applies to both texts A3  refers to each text to show how the stylistic features convey an appreciation of time, or an awareness of time passing and/or the effects over time. Note: There may be some attempt to compare and / or contrast the texts in some way. Achievement The candidate:  provides a firm discussion of the concept of time or the nature of time in both texts  may show awareness of impression on the poet / narrator A4  refers to each text to show how the stylistic features convey an appreciation of time or an awareness of time passing and/or the effects or changes over time. Note: There will be evidence of comparison and / or contrast of the texts. The candidate:  provides a firm and convincing discussion of the concept of time or the nature of time in both texts. M5  may show awareness of impression on the poet / narrator and their attitude to time  refers to each text to show how the stylistic features convey an appreciation of time or an awareness of time passing and/or the effects or changes over time. Merit Note: There will be evidence of comparison and / or contrast of the texts. The candidate:  provides a convincing discussion of the concept or nature of time

M6  reveals the narrator’s impressions, developing an understanding of how the language choices or stylistic features build to reinforce time passing; there may be an awareness of both an embracing of the changes time brings and a sense of resignation or acceptance. Excellence E7 The candidate:  provides a detailed discussion which shows some insight  reveals an understanding of the techniques and integrates the discussion of language choices or stylistic features that build to reinforce time passing; there may be an awareness of both an embracing of the changes time brings and a sense of resignation or acceptance. NCEA Level 3 English 91474 (3.3) — page 7 of 7

The candidate:  provides a detailed discussion which shows perception and insight  reveals understanding of impact of time upon people and the landscape – it may E8 draw on wider issues beyond the text  reveals an understanding of the techniques and integrates the discussion of stylistic features that build to reinforce time passing; there may be an awareness of both an embracing of the changes time brings and a sense of resignation or acceptance.

Note: Answers are judged holistically, not on the basis of evidence included in the schedule.

Comparison of stylistic features between BOTH texts could include:  use of figurative language  the writers remembering a place and a time  use of a personal voice  both texts starting from a central place, a place in time that is described which also becomes reflective and contemplative  use of very concrete diction (eg, place names)  use of characters from the original environment – Bill Miller and Mum and Dad  the acknowledgment of the passing of time without sadness  the acceptance of the passing of time – they do not lament the change  the end of both texts on acceptance – Orr drives on and Hulme has no expectations that her homeplace will stay the same  both texts see the change as inevitable  both texts see the positives and negatives of time passing whether implicit or explicit.

Contrast of stylistic features could include:  Writer A makes reference to Māori language and place names in embracing the ‘dance of change’  Writer A uses more colloquial phrases when talking about being younger and stronger to face change  Writer A uses direct quotations to express the regret of missed opportunities at the time  Writer A uses scientific detail to establish the reputation of the rocks over time  Writer A places herself more directly in the landscape  Writer B makes references to supernatural things linked to an afterlife (a time beyond our world)  Writer B uses wordplay (play on eternity)  Writer B uses more metaphor – writer A uses more description through word choice  Writer B uses more descriptive language (there are richer qualifiers in the poem)  Writer B makes greater use of sound devices.