Telling Is General and Vague (Brief) with Not Much Detail

DESCRIPTIVE WRITING

 “Paint a picture in the reader’s mind/head”  “Showing vs. Telling” “Telling” is general and vague (brief) with not much detail “Showing” is extremely detailed; you BRING IT TO LIFE for reader  Example “boring/telling” sentence: “The dog ate his meal.” This sentence is not detailed; it leaves too much room for the reader to create the image that you want to say. It could be any dog eating any kind of meal.  The same sentence in a “showing” style (descriptive & more specific): “Cooper, Mr. Moffatt’s 70-pound yellow Labrador Retriever, ate the Costco-brand Lamb and Rice chunks of dry dog food that was moist to the touch, yet crunchy when chewed.”  STYLES/TYPES of Description: 1. Imagery (5 senses): write a sentence that somehow, someway appeals to one or more of the five senses (taste, touch, smell, sight, hearing) Ex: The red-headed boy stood by the three-foot-high fire, as he warmed a S’more!

2. Double-Adjective: using two or more adjectives to describe a noun Ex: My crazy, odd dad did a cannonball into the pool, splashing an old woman!

3. Sentence Description: use a longer sentence or more to get your point(s) across Ex: A girl loved Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups so much that she would buy a five-pound bag every single day so that she could devour them by noon, satisfying her craving for the sweet, sugary morsels of Heaven!

4. Comparisons Simile: using “like” or “as” to compare one object to another Ex: The talkative student’s lips move as fast as a tornado over Oklahoma skies!

Metaphor: comparing one object to another not using “like” or “as” (for middle school, using “is”, “are”, “was”, “were”, or “am” works) Ex: Mr. Moffatt is Elvis!

5. Strong, lively words/verbs: try new and different words Ex: The strong football player decimated his opponent on the defensive line! (“Decimated” is a word that is synonymous with “destroyed”/”dominated”)

6. Asides ( also called “appositives”/“interrupters” – commas/parentheses/brackets/hyphens ): Ex: Sara smiled at her man-friend (the guy who bought her a dozen roses yesterday).

7. Adverbs (usually “ly” words – answer “how”/”when”/”where”/”how often”): Ex: Joey sadly served his after-school detention for deliberately tripping a “friend”.

8. Prepositional phrases: think of a “cloud and plane”; these are like asides, but usually don’t have the punctuation marks: Ex: Mr. Baerwald was a running back in football for Idaho in 1988.