Making the Most of Your Mother's Day

Making the Most of Your Mother’s Day

Primary Texts: Deuteronomy 5:16

I. Acknowledgments II. What am I supposed to do with this day? III. The “Mother-Living” Should Rejoice in God’s Goodness IV. The “Mother-Less” Should Recognize God’s Glory V. The “Mother-Lost” Should Rest in God’s Grace

Response: Making the Most of Your Mother’s Day

I. Introduction

As many of you know I love cartoons. I’m not afraid to say it. I like cartoons because they generally provide humor and allow my imagination to expand and if you’re not careful, you can learn some truths from those fictitious characters. I learned a very important lesson from the cartoon “Life with Louie” some years ago. It was a Christmas episode and Louie was concerned because the old woman up the street never followed the others in the neighborhood and put up lights in celebration of the holiday. Louie made it his purpose to brighten this poor lady’s life and enlisted some help to make her house the most spectacular one on the block. When the woman came home and saw her house Louie expected tears of joy but all he got was a quizzical look. When asked why she had never put up lights before the woman replied, “Because I’m Jewish.” Louie had assumed everyone celebrated Christmas like him and never once considered the fact that there might be a real reason why some people didn’t participate. Contrary to popular belief Mother’s Day is like that.

What could be wrong with Mother’s Day? After all it is one of the few holidays in this country that is not separated by religion or nationality. It’s a day for everyone to celebrate mothers. Mother’s Day is also is the biggest calling day of the year and probably second only to Christmas in the number of cards sent through the mail. With all of this going for it, who could have a problem with Mother’s Day? The answer to that is probably in the thousands. Some people that we know and love have some serious issues with Mother’s Day and it is time we help them deal with them. What am I talking about? I’m talking about the emotions that are drawn out of some men and women at the mere mention of the second Sunday in May. Emotions such as grief and anger are just as prevalent as joy and love on Mother’s Day. That’s because as far as I’m concerned there are three types of people, the “Mother-living,” the “Mother-lost,” and the “Mother-less.” The mother-living are those whose mothers are still around and have a great relationship with their children. It’s what all the cards picture for us. The mother-lost are those who had that great relationship with their mother but she has died. Mother’s day isn’t as much a day of celebration as it is a day of mourning. But there’s still a third group which I call the mother-less. These are the people whose mothers are still alive but those mothers are less than their children wanted or needed. The children abandoned by their mothers either physically or emotionally fall into this category. Over the last few years it seems that I have met a wide range of all three types of people and Mother’s Day has become a little more exciting. It’s very easy for us to pretend that the only group that exists is the mother-living because it makes us feel better. However, if we are to be whole as a people then we have to address the feeling of the other two groups that surround us.

And wouldn’t you know the bible speaks to all three groups in its own wonderful way. The basis for any discussion on Mother’s Day has to be Deuteronomy 5:16 which says, “Honor your father and your mother, as the LORD thy God hath commanded you; that your days may be prolonged, and that it may go well with you, in the land which the LORD your God gives you.” The reason we must start at this verse because this is the foundational command for children in relation to their parents. By honoring our fathers and our mothers we are honoring God and honoring God should be the central purpose of our lives. But an argument can be made that two-thirds of the people do not have a mother to honor. My response is while that is true, we all have a God who is worthy of honor and we should take time to spend Mother’s Day doing just that. When we get the order right, Mother’s Day will take on a new meaning and be a wonderful day for everyone. Let’s see what we need to do to make the most of our Mother’s Day.

II. The “Mother-Living” Should Rejoice in God’s Goodness

Bill Cosby tells a great story about raising his son and getting him to the NFL. He talks about how a father will take the son out and teach him how to run, catch and tackle. He tells us about the father going to all the games and cheering the son on. He closes by reminding us that in the biggest game of the son’s career after he scores the winning touchdown and the camera zooms in on him, the son says, “Hi mom.” Years of the father’s work is negated because the only person the son wants to mention at the highpoint of his life is his mother. Mothers are vitally important. None of us would be here without a mother. While we’ve figured out how to make a baby without the physical act of sex, we haven’t figured out how to make a baby grow without being carried by a woman. Motherhood is vital which is why we see so many cards sold and calls made on that Sunday. Heck, some folks even choose Mother’s Day as one of the three days of the year that they go to church. Mother’s Day is a big day because mothers are very important. And in light of the wonderful blessing that their mothers are, the mother-living should rejoice in God’s goodness.

The Apostle James tells us “Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights…” (James 1:17). Our parents are a gift and we should be appreciative. When I think about my relationship with my mom I realize how blest I am because my mom demonstrated to me the love of God. No matter how bad I did or how many mistakes I made I could count on the fact that she loved me. I’m sure there are a lot of people around who have similar stories. I put us in the group of that old saying which goes, “He’s got a face that only a mother could love.” We who have mothers that are involved in our lives and have provided a wonderful foundation for our futures should most certainly thank God for blessing us with such a wonderful gift. And as the mother-less will tell you, not every mother is the kind of mother you want to spend your time thanking God for.

Too often we look at a special mother and take her for granted. We just assume we deserve parents that treat us right. We need to be sure not only to praise them on that specific Sunday in May but we also need to thank God for giving them to us. Contrary to popular belief which family we are born into is not a random act, it is by the sovereign will of God. He placed us in the womb of our mothers not because we had done so much for Him but because He wanted to bless us. We are incredibly shortsighted when we look at the unbelievable gift of a wonderful mother and don’t thank God for His goodness in giving her to us. He didn’t have to but He did. And I have to believe that when we just take it for granted, we hurt His heart. While we are buying cards and making phone calls and planning special dinners, we as the mother-living should take a moment to rejoice in God’s goodness and say thank you.

III. The “Mother-Less” Should Recognize God’s Glory

After hearing all those good things about the mothers of the mother-living and how good God was to them, the mother-less can certainly develop a case of the “why mes?” After all their mother didn’t come close to demonstrating the love of God. Quite possibly their mothers left them or abused them and those instances are enough to call God’s goodness into question. After all, if God is so good why would He stick those people with mothers He knew would abuse them? All I can say is God knew it could happen and that’s why He provided Himself to be the stopgap in the lives of the mother-less. In Isaiah 49:15, God asks, “Can a woman forget her sucking child, that she should not have compassion on the son of her womb? Yea, they may forget, yet will I not forget thee.” It is to the mother-less especially I believe God is talking to when He says, “I will never leave you nor forsake you” (Hebrews 13:5). God has something special in store for the mother-less and on a day they would rather forget, the mother-less should recognize God’s glory.

It’s a fair attack for those whose mothers weren’t as wonderful as mine to say I have no idea what I’m talking about because my mother is the best. However, I know the God of the mother-less and I know that no matter the situation He is worthy of glory because everything that has happened to the mother-less is part of the perfect plan of God. If that is not true, Romans 8:28 is a lie. That verse says, “We know all things work together for the good of those that love God and are called according to His purpose.” “All” is a pretty big word and it includes mothers that were less than wonderful. This verse is why we should celebrate the glory of God on Mother’s Day because He can do wonderful things with our lives when our mothers let us down. Do you think Isaiah 49:15 was just something thrown into the book? No way! God knew there would be people who would feel the pain of having a mother that did not live up to the ideal but He wanted to assure everyone that He would be there even when mother isn’t.

I also want to be sure to say something about the worth of the mother-less. It’s easy for kids to see problems in their parents and blame themselves. Children of divorced parents think they were responsible. Children of abusive parents think the same. The problem for the mother-less says nothing about their value. Being mother-less doesn’t equal worthless. The principle that I count on for this is found in John 9:1-3 which says, “And as Jesus passed by, he saw a man which was blind from his birth. And his disciples asked him, saying, Master, who did sin, this man, or his parents, that he was born blind? Jesus answered, Neither hath this man sinned, nor his parents: but that the works of God should be made manifest in him.” Just like being born blind didn’t specify the worth of the man in this story (whom Jesus later heals by the way), being mother-less doesn’t define the value of a person. This circumstance like any other serves has been put in the lives so that God’s glory could be manifest. I’ve said it before and I truly believe that we serve a show-off God. He wants to do great things in the worst situations and the lives of the mother-less provide a great place for Him to do His thing. Take time out on Mother’s Day and recognize the glory of God in your life though you are mother-less. IV. The “Mother-Lost” Should Rest in God’s Grace

I think the most overlooked group on Mother’s Day is the mother-lost. The mother- living and the mother-less eventually come together to form this third group and theirs is a unique pain. The formerly mother-living now see Mother’s Day as a day of sadness and loss as they deal with a huge part of their lives being gone. The formerly mother-less spend Mother’s Day wondering what could have been. While their mother was alive there was always the possibility of restoration but once the mother passed from life to death that hope was dashed. Mother’s Day is a day of sadness for the mother-lost. However, I don’t think it’s coincidence that we celebrate this day on Sunday because Mother’s Day should be a day of rest for the mother-lost; a day for the mother-lost to rest in God’s grace.

In most of Paul’s letters he offers the blessing of grace and peace to his readers. They always appear in the order of grace first and then peace because if we’re going to have any peace in our lives we’re going to need to understand God’s grace. On Mother’s Day the mother-lost need to fall on the grace of God to carry them through another year. God’s grace provides strength when we are weak (2 Corinthians 12:9) and brings clarity to difficult situations (Titus 2:11-12). The loss of a loved one is never easy but if we’re going to make it we have to hold on to God’s love and His grace. We already talked about God’s love with His desire to be there for the mother-less but His grace covers the situation of all three groups. Grace is unmerited favor and even in the lives of the mother-lost God’s favor can be seen. If we lose sight of His grace we are sure to fall apart. There are no magic words to make the situation better but there is God’s grace to soften the blow.

Perhaps the greatest evidence of God’s grace is that death is not the end of anything. If our mothers were saved and we are saved then it is a guarantee that we will see them again. We won’t pick up where we left off. We will pick up in a much better place because some of us left off on dialysis machines and in Alzheimer’s wards. But in that day there will be no more crying or dying. We will know as we are known and be able to experience eternity with the mothers we’ve loved. Again, that sounds good for those with great mothers but what about the previously mother-less? I like this idea that if both mother and child were saved then they will have an opportunity over eternity to build the relationship that God wanted them to have. For a lot of people I know that’s an unbelievable opportunity and it’s only possible because of grace. And grace abounds for those whose mothers aren’t saved because God has promised to wipe every tear from their eyes and move them into a glorious life. We find it hard to imagine that we’ll be able to be happy for eternity with that relationship still broken but I find peace in knowing that the bible says we will know as we are known and we will be able to better understand what went on in that relationship. God’s grace is available to help us on both sides of the grave. In this live His grace will give us the strength to carry on. On the other side His grace will give us the opportunity to mend broken relationships or resume them or even help us cope with the loss. Grace is a wonderful thing and when we catch on to it we will have peace. Not just peace because war is absent but peace in the midst of whatever turmoil we may be facing; peace that passes all understanding. On Mother’s Day I urge the mother-lost to rest in God’s grace and receive the peace He wants you to have.

V. Conclusion

Mother’s Day can be a great day but we can’t start with our mothers. We have to start with God because the situations with our mother’s can change but God stays the same no matter what. Starting with God on Mother’s Day will lead us to rejoice in His goodness because He gave us our mothers. Starting with God on Mother’s Day should help us recognize God’s glory as He uses our pain to produce wonderful things in our lives. Starting with God on Mother’s Day will help us rest in His grace as He holds are hands in the midst of our mourning and helps us move forward in Him. Mother’s Day doesn’t appear anywhere in scripture but like the festivals of the bible it provides and opportunity for us to grow closer to God no matter where we find ourselves.

I mentioned the wonder of getting to spend eternity with our mothers. For some that doesn’t sound like so good of an idea but the potential for joy is definitely there. Two saved folk in the presence of Jesus forever has to be a formula for a wonderful relationship. But that can’t happen if either the mother or the children are not saved. Before we worry about whether our mother’s are saved or not, we need to check ourselves. Do we have the confidence that when we take our last breath that we will open our eyes and stare into the face of Jesus Christ? If not, then we need to take care of that right now. By simply asking Jesus to be Lord of your life and believing that He took your place on the cross to pay for your sins and you will be saved. Confess and believe. It’s that easy and your life will be changed from the inside out.

At that point it’s time to make sure things are straight with mom. If you are mother-lost then I pray your mother was saved. If she wasn’t then pray for God to give you the grace to make it through your loss. If she was saved, celebrate because you’re going to see mom again. If you are mother-less or mother-living and you’re not sure about where your mom stands then don’t waste any time and pray for her. Pray that she will come to know Jesus that at least the two of you will have that in common. Pray for her everyday believing that God wants her saved more than you do. He will give her every opportunity to give her life over to Him. And by His grace, she will be saved too and you will have the opportunity to create that wonderful relationship you were always looking for and enjoy it forever. If mom is saved and now you are saved, tell her. That will be the best news she can get. That way you two can begin enjoying that heavenly relationship right now.

Make the most of your Mother’s Day by beginning with God and rejoicing in His goodness, recognizing His glory and resting in His grace. Mother’s Day will never be the same again.