CHAPTER 13 DIVORCE NOTES

AMERICANS LIKE MARRIAGE: One of highest marriage rates in industrialized world AMERICANS DON’T LIKE MARRIAGE: One of the highest divorce rates in world. AMERICANS LIKE MARRIAGE: One of the highest remarriage rates in the world. 1/3 remarries within a year

50% OF ALL MARRIAGES ARE LIKELY TO END IN DIVORCE

How can we prevent divorce? Make getting out of marriage more difficult? It used to be hard with a reason Encourage women to stay home with children so they can afford to get out? Large contributor to likelihood of divorce Encourage family self-sacrifice and less self-fulfillment? Impose more religious constraints? Should we re-stigmatize divorce?

Majority of divorce is caused by idealization of marriage. Must realize marriage is like LIFE – it is lifelong commitment involving considerable sacrifice. It is hard and has many problems.

COVENTANT MARRIAGE*******

Why so people divorce? List on board

1. Personality problems (most common reason given) 2. Home life 3. Authoritarianism 4. Differing valued

SOCIOLOGICAL FACTORS – Who is more likely to divorce?  Income (poverty)  Education (low)  Religion (less)  Race (African Americans more than White)

LIFE COURSE FACTORS  Age at time of marriage (young)  Pregnancy early in marriage (adolescent)  1st of 2nd marriage? (second)  Parents married or divorced (divorced) DIVORCE PROCESS Do you see a judge? Do you go to trial? Attorneys never work to reconcile a divorcing couple – catalyst for adversary

90% NO CONTEST No Fault Divorce ( irreconcilable diff, neither party responsible)

Cost?

1. Emotional Divorce: one spouse disengages 2. Legal Divorce: court ordered 3. Economic Divorce: Property settlement Result of no-fault is that divorcing women are impoverished 27% decline for women, 10% decline for men (1/2 the income to live on) 1 out of 2 live below poverty level

Why? Gender discrimination, age discrimination, day care problems, lower earning capacity.

4. Co-parental Divorce: Marriage ends but parenting does not 5. Community Divorce: In-law become ex-laws, friends take sides 6. Psychic Divorce (Most Difficult): Former spouse becomes irrelevant to you

Marital Separation Separation Distress: Situational anxiety 2nd only to death of a spouse

New self – Post-divorce identity

Dating again Statement to community Opportunity for building self esteem Initiates into single subculture No relevance between dating and happiness as a single

ALIMONY & CHILD SUPPORT Alimony in only 15% of divorces Less support, more controversial Investment Doctrine: Medical education support entitled to future income and retirement

Trump to Avana = $60,000/month

60%of divorces involve children 90% of moms get custody. Why? Children rarely see divorce as the opportunity parent may see but if abuse stops it is a relief.

*Who does better? Young or older children? (younger & boys) *What do they feel? (Guilt, anger, blame) Teens rarely feel guilt or blame self *How to tell and how to answer questions? (Both present & reassure about living conditions) *How to help them adjust? Communicate, Continued involvement, lack of hostility, stable living conditions

CUSTODY 1. Sole: 2. Joint Legal: 3. Joint Physical: 4. Split Custody: 5. Joint:

MEDIATION: Husbands feel good about it and are more willing to pay child support.