1St Place One-Act Play Winner Daniel Bezanson (City)

SDCCD One-Act Play 1

1st Place One-Act Play Winner Daniel Bezanson (City)

“Like Paint Watching Me Dry”

The scene opens with an empty stage. Dan is sitting on the ground staring at a young potted plant. Donald is next to him in a chair staring at a bowl covered with a towel on a table. Both appear bored and frustrated, but look at their objects with anticipation and intensity. Donald: Yo man, what are you doing?

Dan: Oh, uh, just gardening a little. Donald: It doesn’t look like you’re gardening. It looks like you’re just staring at a pot.

Dan: Are you trying to tell me how I should tend to my plants? Look buddy, I don’t go to where you work and slap the….

Donald: Whoa, whoa man. Easy. I’m just sayin’, it don’t look like you’re doing much from over here.

Dan: I know. I know. I’m sorry. I’ve just put so much into this plant. It’s going to blossom soon, and I don’t want to miss it.

Donald: (inspects plant, gives a look to Dan, looks at pot again, gives Dan another look) Man, that is a sprout. That thing is not going to bloom anytime soon. Are you really that bored?

Dan: Look, I have been working with this plant for a long time. I hand picked the seed, I made sure I found the best possible soil, I have been watering it, giving it lots of sun, and talking to it. I have done everything right and now I am just waiting for the big payoff. This thing is my baby, and I want to make sure nothing goes wrong and everything works out.

Donald: Well you are definitely dedicated. Crazy, but dedicated. (Mellissa enters stage)

Mellissa: Hey guys! We are headed to the Fun Factory tonight. Everyone who graduated last semester is going to be there. It’s going to be a blast!

Dan: Ehhhh, I can’t make it. Mellissa: What? Why?

Dan: I really have my hands tied. I’ll catch up with you guys soon, I am just booked solid with work.

Mellissa: (sad disappointed look) Okay, well I hope you get your things done. What about you?

Donald: Oh me? Uh, I might. I mean, I’m buried with things to get done myself. I got a lot of cooking to do. 2

Mellissa: (looks at both of them. Feels sad and let down) Alright guys. Well, I’ll tell everyone you can’t make it. Be sure to get a hold of us if you get your work done. Everyone would love to see you guys.

Donald: Oh yeah for sure. Dan: Yeah, if I get done with my stuff I’ll see you all later.

Mellissa: Alright. Bye guys. (exits stage) Dan & Donald: Bye

Dan: So, what the hell are you doing over there? Donald: Oh I am just finishing up this pizza dough I have been working on.

Dan: Oh is that what’s in the bowl? Donald: Yeah

Dan: So what is it almost done rising or something? Donald: (hesitant) Mmmmmmm yeah you could say that.

Dan: What do you mean, “I could say that”? When did you set it to rise? Donald: A little bit ago.

Dan: How little of a bit? Donald: (hesitant and avoiding looking at Dan) …. A few minutes ago.

Dan: What?? You do know that it can take anywhere from hours to days for pizza dough to rise properly, right?

Donald: Hey, hey man. I know what I’m doing okay. Dan: So you are just going to stare at a bowl for a few days?

Donald: Look man, I am not staring at it. I am guarding it. This is an old family recipe with secret ingredients passed down from my grandma. This is special. I need to stay with it and make sure nothing happens to it. Dan: Sounds obsessive.

Donald: Oh, blow it out your …. (Brian enters stage dribbling a basketball)

Brian: Alright girls, we are two short for the game. We need Wesley Snipes and Woody Harrelson. Let’s do this!

Dan & Donald: (after two beats, in unison) NO 3

Brian: You guys are still staring at that shit? You guys are no fun at all anymore.

(Brian walks off stage shaking his head) (Dan and Donald stare at their object intensely for a few moments)

Donald: (in frustration, starts to remove towel from bowl) Man, screw this. I’m gonna fix this so I can get on with my life.

Dan: Whoa, whoa! What are you doing? Donald: I’m gonna make this thing rise with my hands, I can’t be waiting around for this pizza dough. I’m gonna fix it. Dan: No! Don’t do that! You’ll just ruin it. You can’t rush some things. With pizza dough time is an essential ingredient. You just gotta wait. Donald: Oh yeah? How do you know?

Dan: This is my third plant. I tried to make the others bloom before they were ready, and it just ruined them. That’s why this time, I am just going to leave it alone and watch. Sit on my hands. (Donald looks at Dan, takes the advice, they both stare at their objects with obvious frustrated boredom, but vigilance. Moments of silence as they stare.) Dan: So….. do you think she’ll ever come back?

Donald: (slow to respond, looks at Dan with some compassion) Man, I don’t know. That is such a strange situation. If you tried anything else it would probably just screw it up more.

Dan: (meditates on Donald’s advice for a moment) What about you guys? Donald: Who? Me and her?

Dan: Yeah. Donald: I’m not sure. It could really go either way.

Dan: Yeah I guess you can’t fix everything. Sometimes you just got to wait and see. Donald: Yeah.

(Dan and Donald mull on their thoughts) Donald: Do you think they still need us for Basketball?

Dan: Yeah, this room is pretty safe. I bet if we just left for a little bit, with the door locked, these would be fine.

Dan: Yeah (The two begin to walk off stage together) 4

Dan: Man, I am gonna dunk right over your head

Donald: Dan, listen to me. White men can’t jump.