Visit Scenario #5 (The Visit from Hell) C = Caregiver (Son in Law) Jerrod Felder M = Mother (Patient) Trudy Pentup Diagnosis:
The Dumpster Principle Tune-In Driveway Manners Update the Brain Container (picking out specific piece of information from the LAST person that visited to mention during your visit) Vibrate On Breath (Center Yourself) “I Am a Teacher” Everything I Need…
Entrance C: Who the hell is it God Damit! (Stern and rough)
Project Warmth
C: What the hell do you want? We don’t need your help.
Interaction C: I know who you are. You come from your nice cushy home. But I know your kind! Do your thing here…but know I’ll be watching you…your every move. C: And don’t fuck with me! I mean it! C: I’ve had a bad day. A bad, bad day…
Perceive Bag Mat Sanitize Eye-Level, Lean-In
Biggest Concern C: You could visit more often. After all, you are being paid enough. And I’ve read that many hospices don’t do very much for what they are paid.
Presence Validate
Interaction C: How do I know that you are a quality hospice program?
Presence Validate
Interaction C: I think that Mom could be made more comfortable.
Presence
Multi-View Incorporated Systems PO Box 2327 Hendersonville, NC 28793 1611 Asheville Highway, Hendersonville, NC 28791 828-698-5885 Fax: 828-698-5884 www.multiviewinc.com Visit Scenario #5 (The Visit from Hell)
Interaction C: Money. You got money! I’ve got an ex-wife that takes every damn dime I make. That’s like I’m living in this shit-hole with my Mom. It’s fucking hell.
Presence
C: Mom’s fine. I’m not worried.
Validate C: You’re pretty. Do you have a man? A real man? Manage Expectations
Introducing Mr. Gates - Computer Introduced C: Beauty and brains. I like that…
C: (Long Sniff)…I like the way you smell…
Teach Rather Than Do C: What are you going to do if I don’t do it? Teach Back (#1) C: Does that satisfy you? Teach Back (#2) C: Don’t tell me what to do, you bitch! I’ve seen your kind all my life! Do- gooders! But you don’t fool me…
Crystal Ball
Verify Visit Frequency Tell Me How Grim It Is
I’ve watched what you’re doing and you’re doing a great job. To make it even better do X and Y.
C: (No response)
You have everything you need… TEACHER: [most of the medications are gone] C: Are you accusing me of something! You make one more accusation like that and bad things might happen…to you!
C: I’m not saying that I would do anything…but things do happen.
Number in View
Is there anything else I can help you with? TEACHER: Ask to Student to explain EMDR or anything on the Hospice Menu. C: Nope. (soft) I didn’t mean to curse and approach you, but you know how it is… Mom dying and all… She’s all I really have…
Multi-View Incorporated Systems PO Box 2327 Hendersonville, NC 28793 1611 Asheville Highway, Hendersonville, NC 28791 828-698-5885 Fax: 828-698-5884 www.multiviewinc.com Visit Scenario #5 (The Visit from Hell)
Presence
Validate
Assure and Build Confidence
Express Gratitude for the Privilege to Serve!
C: Look at you! There’s that fucking do-gooder again!
Exit C: One more question missy, (softly) what’s your cell number! I mean, Mom might need some help in the middle of the night…
C: Hell, I guess you can solve all of the world’s fucking problems can’t you!
C: Well I’ll look forward to seeing you again… I was only joking about things you know.
C: Chow…
I’ve Just Got to Get a Message to You…” Sync Device Release
Multi-View Incorporated Systems PO Box 2327 Hendersonville, NC 28793 1611 Asheville Highway, Hendersonville, NC 28791 828-698-5885 Fax: 828-698-5884 www.multiviewinc.com