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Life Transformation Through Voice Dialogue Variwan

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Life Transformation Through Voice Dialogue Variwan LIFE TRANSFORMATION THROUGH VOICE DIALOGUE VARIWAN VITAYATHANAGORN A THESIS SUBMITTED IN PARTIAL FULFILLMENT OF THE REQUIREMENTS FOR THE DEGREE OF MASTER OF ARTS (CONTEMPLATIVE EDUCATION AND TRANSFORMATIVE LEARNING) FACULTY OF GRADUATE STUDIES MAHIDOL UNIVERSITY 2014 COPYRIGHT OF MAHIDOL UNIVERSITY iii ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS This thesis could not have been completed without help and support from various people around me. First to the board of committee, I would like to thank my main advisor, Dr. Sakchai Anantrechai, for his encouragement, guidance, and feedback in my writing. He had good trust in my ability and my process to complete this thesis. I would also like to thank Dr. Chumpol Poolpatarachewin who was very generous with his time and accessibility to give useful advice since the process of drafting my proposal to make it appropriate and possible to complete within time frame. I am honored to have him as a chairperson. Dr. Chatchawan Silpakit was also helpful in giving useful suggestions and reminding me of many details that I might have missed. I am wholeheartedly grateful for the willingness and consistent generous support that J’aime ona Pangaia gave me since day 1 when I asked her that I would like to do my thesis by interviewing her life. Without her, this thesis would not exist. Special thanks to Particia Morgan who was so generous and offered her help on quick transcribing the whole long interview records. In addition, I am lucky that I happened to meet Dr. Susan J. Newton who was a most suitable editor for my work. She was very helpful for the last piece of finishing up this thesis to make my writing language go smoothly and correctly. Big love and thanks to all of my 12 CECT friends. Every single one of them was a part of my transformational process. They always provide support in their own style. I cannot find enough words to express my feelings how meaningful our relationships are. I’ve learnt so much from all of them. My heartfelt thanks to Oam Ratanakarn. He has been an important part in my life since I started doing this thesis. He always listened to me when I shared my frustration and difficulties that I faced during the whole process. His encouragement always lifted me up. I would like to extend my acknowledgment to my Thai Voice Dialogue fellows. Because of them, I have friends who talk in the same language and have common interest in this subject. My main thanks go to Somphol Chaisiriroj who was the first person that brought J’aime to Thailand to teach this work and Suchada Assawaharutai who was my only Thai companion in taking the 2-year Transformational Arts Program in Portland with me. Finally, I am grateful to my beloved mother and father who have raised me and supported me in every step in my life. Thank you for understanding me and opening your hearts enough to trust me to walk on my own path. I love you both from the bottom of my heart. Variwan Vitayathanagorn Fac.of Grad. Studies, Mahidol Univ. Thesis /iv LIFE TRANSFORMATION THROUGH VOICE DIALGOUE VARIWAN VITAYATHANAGORN 5236728 CECT/M M.A.(COMTEMPLATIVE EDUCATION AND TRANSFORMATIVE LEARNING) THESIS ADVISORY COMMITTEE :SAKCHAI ANANTRECHAI, Ph.D., CHATCHAWAN SILPAKIT, Ph.D. ABSTRACT Voice Dialogue is a consciousness transformational path that has the main objective of cultivating an Aware Ego Process in a person through its main tool which is Voice Dialogue Facilitation. The other related elements in Voice Dialogue are the psychology of selves, psychology of an aware ego, bonding patterns and dream process. This research study mainly focused on the life transformation through Voice Dialogue. The research method used was “life story interview” which is a kind of narrative approach that had only one purposeful key informant who is senior Voice Dialogue facilitator and teacher with almost 30-year experience. The results showed that transformation happens naturally throughout an individual’s life through various kinds of life events. However, it is important for an individual to learn how to go through and be with the period of transformation with trust and consciously engage in the transformation process itself. Voice Dialogue is one of the powerful transformational tool/approach that gives supporting means for a person to practice. Over time, ongoing practice of Voice Dialogue can bring a sense of impermanence to one’s life that will liberate a person from a fixed attachment of being in certain kind of selves. One can experience the freewill. One’s consciousness will expand and evolve. The person will become more whole. As a result, the natural compassion and humanity will emerge from within. KEY WORDS: LIFE TRANSFORMATION/ CONSCIOUSNESS/ AWARENESS/ VOICE DIALOGUE/ AWARE EGO PROCESS 173 pages Fac.of Grad. Studies, Mahidol Univ. Thesis /v การเปลี่ยนแปลงชีวิตขั้นพื้นฐานผานงานวอยซไดอะลอค LIFE TRANSFORMATION THROUGH VOICE DIALGOUE วริวรรณ วิทยฐานกรณ 5236728 CECT/M ศศ.ม. (จิตตปญญาศึกษาและการเรียนรูสูการเปลี่ยนแปลง) คณะกรรมการที่ปรึกษาวิทยานิพนธ : ศักดิ์ชัย อนันตตรีชัย, Ph.D., ชัชวาลย ศิลปกิจ, พ.บ., Ph.D. บทคัดยอ วอยซไดอะลอคเปนงานบนเสนทางการเปลี่ยนแปลงของจิตสํานึกซึ่งมีจุดมุงหมายหลักเพื่อ บมเพาะกระบวนการเทาทันตัวตนในบุคคลผานเครื่องมือหลักของงานนี้คือการสัมภาษณตัวตน องคประกอบสําคัญอื่นๆที่เกี่ยวของในงานวอยซไดอะลอคคือจิตวิทยาเหลาตัวตน จิตวิทยาเทาทันตัวตน แบบแผนพึ่งพิงทางความสัมพันธ และกระบวนการทํางานกับความฝน งานวิจัยเชิงคุณภาพชิ้นนี้มีวัตถุประสงคเพื่อศึกษาเรื่องการเปลี่ยนแปลงชีวิตขั้นพื้นฐานผาน งานวอยซไดอะลอค โดยใชการสัมภาษณเรื่องราวชีวิตเชิงลึก และนําเสนอผานรูปแบบเรื่องเลาซึ่งมีผูให ขอมูลหลักแบบเฉพาะเจาะจงเพียงหนึ่งตัวอยางคือเจมี่ โอนา แพนกายา ผูสัมภาษณตัวตน/ครูวอยซไดอะ ลอคอาวุโสผูมีประสบการณกับงานวอยซไดอะลอคมาเกือบ 30ป ผลของการศึกษาพบวาตลอดชวงชีวิตของแตละบุคคล การเปลี่ยนแปลงขั้นพื้นฐานนั้น เกิดขึ้นอยางเปนธรรมชาติตามเหตุปจจัยตางๆที่เขามาสูชีวิต แตอยางไรก็ตามสิ่งสําคัญสําหรับปจเจกบุคคล ที่กําลังผานชวงการเปลี่ยนแปลงนั้น คือความสามารถที่จะเรียนรูในการดํารงอยูกับแตละขณะของการ เปลี่ยนแปลงอยางตระหนักรูและเทาทัน รวมถึงการมีความสามารถที่จะไววางใจตอกระบวนการ เปลี่ยนแปลงนั้นๆดวย วอยซไดอะลอคเปนหนึ่งในเครื่องมือและวิธีการปฏิบัติที่มีประสิทธิภาพซึ่งสามารถ สนับสนุนกระบวนการการเปลี่ยนแปลงของปจเจกบุคคลใหเกิดการตระหนักรูและเทาทัน เมื่อบุคคลไดรับ การฝกฝนอยางตอเนื่องและยาวนานพอ การยึดติดในตัวตนจะลดลงเนื่องจากสามารถประจักษถึงความจริง ที่วาตัวตนตางๆมีการเปลี่ยนแปลงและเปนสิ่งที่ชั่วคราวอยูตลอดเวลา ซึ่งสามารถสงผลใหเกิดอิสรภาพที่ แท ถอดถอนการเห็นผิดและการติดยึดในตัวตนตางๆ เกิดอิสรภาพในการเลือกอยางแทจริง เกิดการวิวัฒน และการขยายของจิตสํานึก สามารถเขาใกลการเปนมนุษยที่บริบูรณยิ่งขึ้น และความเมตตาที่แทจริงตอ ความเปนมนุษยจะผุดบังเกิดขึ้นจากภายใน 173 หนา vi CONTENTS Page ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS iii ABSTRACT (ENGLISH) iv ABSTRACT (THAI) v LIST OF FIGURES viii CHAPTER I INTRODUCTION 1 1.1 Background and Significance of the Problem 1 1.2 Purpose of the Study 5 1.3 Thesis Question 5 1.4 Scope of the Study 5 1.5 Limitations of the Study 6 1.6 Importance of the Study 6 1.7 Definitions of Terms 7 CHAPTER II LITERATURE REVIEW 9 2.1 Theoretical Framework 9 2.2 Review of Voice Dialogue 18 CHAPTER III RESEARCH METHOD 38 3.1 Research Design 38 3.2 Research Procedures 40 3.3 Interview Guidelines 43 CHAPTER IV LIFE STORY TELLING 46 vii CONTENTS (cont.) Page CHAPTER V LIFE TRANSFORMATION AN 115 INTERPRETATION OF LIFE STORY 5.1 Overall Life Transformation 116 5.2 Life Transformation Through Voice Dialogue 125 CHAPTER VI REFLECTION AND CONCLUSION 151 RESEARCHER’S PERSONAL JOURNEY BIBLIOGRAPHY 168 BIOGRAPHY 173 viii LIST OF FIGURES Figure Page 2.1 A diagram of a Male-Female interaction of Bonding Pattern 31 Fac. of Grad. Studies, Mahidol Univ. M.A.(Comtemplative Education and Transformative….) / 1 CHAPTER I INTRODUCTION 1.1 Background and Significance of the Problem I was born in a big extended Chinese business-focused family. All of my parents’ family members are business persons. I am the eldest daughter among three siblings. However, for my first 12 years, I was raised as an only child since my second-born brother and my younger sister came along later. When I was young, my parents worked very hard since they were building up the family financially. So I spent a lot of time with many of my nannies and neighbours throughout my childhood. As I remember, at home, I used to be a very aggressive girl, easily annoyed, self- centered, angry, stubborn, and sometimes scolded other people. On the other hand, at school, I was very quiet, well-behaved, got along well with friends and teachers, nice, lovely, and helpful but lacking in self-confidence. I started to get confused and have wondered about my personality ever since I was young. Besides my own confusion about my mixed personalities, I also received contrasting comments from my relatives and friends regarding my behaviors and attitudes toward things around me. For example, when I was with my maternal relatives, they said that I was a big spender, but when I was with my dad’s relatives, they said that I was economical. That made me even more confused and I asked myself, “What kind of a person am I?” and “Who am I really?” As a Buddhist, my meditation practice began when I was in high school. I went to a week-long youth Buddhist meditation camp every year from grade 10 until my first year in university. Meditation practice calmed me down, and I behaved less aggressively. When I started working, I realized that my aggressiveness had seemingly been hidden and successfully suppressed for a long time because it burst out only a few times with small annoying events. I often heard people remark about me that “You are a kind-hearted woman” or “You are just like St.
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