Cover Illustration by Aaron Manczyk 143-14 free Jan. 7 - Jan. 13, 2011 fictions January 7 - January 13, 2011 •

Joel Tichinoff, Editor in Chief [email protected] Bethany Horne, Staff [email protected] Samantha Durnford, News Editor [email protected] DSU Weekly Dispatch Katie Toth, Opinions Editor Mark Your Calendars for Upcoming Events [email protected] Rebecca Spence, Arts Editor Erica Eades, Assistant Arts Editor Sex Toy Bingo & Deal or No Deal staff. [email protected] Wednesday, January 12 Dylan Matthias, Sports Editor [email protected] Come out and enjoy a night of debauchery, with your chance to play bingo for sex toys. Abram Gutscher, Photo Editor The game begins at 9:00pm and you must be 19+ to attend. [email protected] Jonathan Rotsztain, Art Director We will also be testing out a new game night based on the popular hit TV show Deal or [email protected] No Deal! Three students will compete for a chance to win a $1000.00 prize! We will also be hosting this game during Thursday Night Trivia on Thursday, January 13. contact us. www.dalgazette.com The SUB, Room 312 Fusion Friday featuring DJ Sticks 6136 University Avenue Friday, January 14 Halifax NS, B3H 4J2 General Inquiries Come see internationally known DJ Sticks for only $3.00! The show begins at 9:00pm 902 494 1280 and you must be 19+ to attend [email protected] Advertising Inquiries Dal’s Got Talent Ben McDade, Ad Manager 902 222 1160 Wednesday, January 19 [email protected] Come out and see what your fellow students and colleagues have to offer! There is no cover charge for the show and this is a wet/dry event! the fine print. The Gazette is the official written record of its staff. Views expressed in the Streeter feature Dalhousie University since 1868 and is open to are solely those of the person being quoted, and Open Mic participation from all students. It is published not The Gazette’s writers or staff. This publication weekly during the academic year by the Dalhouse is intended for readers 18 years of age or older. Wednesday, January 26 Gazette Publishing Society. The Gazette is a The views of our writers are not the explicit views student-run publication. Its primary purpose is to of Dalhousie University. All students of Dalhousie Come and watch your fellow students perform or enter yourself to compete for a report fairly and objectively on issues of importance University, as well as any interested parties on and interest to the students of Dalhousie University, or off-campus, are invited to contribute to any chance to win $100.00. If you’ve got talent, we want you to bring it! The show begins at to provide an open forum for the free expression section of the newspaper. Please contact the and exchange of ideas, and to stimulate appropriate editor for submission guidelines, or 9:00pm and you must be 19+ to attend. meaningful debate on issues that affect or would drop by for our weekly volunteer meetings every otherwise be of interest to the student body and/ Monday at 5:30 p.m. in room 312 of the Dal SUB. or society in general. A “staff contributor” is a The Gazette reserves the right to edit and reprint Fusion Friday member of the paper defined as a person who has all submissions, and will not publish material had three volunteer articles, or photographs of deemed by its editorial board to be discriminatory, Friday, January 28 reasonable length, and/or substance published in racist, sexist, homophobic or libellous. Opinions three different issues within the current publishing expressed in submitted letters are solely those of This event is brought to you by Engineers Without Boarders! There will be three bands year. Views expressed in the letters to the editor, the authors. Editorials in The Gazette are signed Overheard at Dal, and opinions section are solely and represent the opinions of the writer(s), not performing! More details for this event will follow so keep an eye on the DSU website those of the contributing writers, and do not necessarily those of The Gazette staff, Editorial and Dispatches in the Gazette for more information! necessarily represent the views of The Gazette or Board, publisher, or Dalhousie University. Grawood Specials and Regular Programming Open Every Monday through Friday for lunch from 11:30am - 1:30pm

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from the editor

E-mail Joel at [email protected] from the editor. Joel Tichinoff Editor-in-Chief

FictionWe tell stories. Our world is full them. vision for Facebook was “eventually, a “the right of people to freely access story is the personal story of Julian Some we tell to others, some to layer underneath almost every electronic information” and how “the more Assange. The allegations against ourselves. Some are true, some are not. device. You’ll turn on your TV, and you’ll freely information flows, the stronger Julian Assange, the Wikileaks editor- Stories tell us something about our world see that fourteen of your Facebook societies become and how access to in-chief who became the target of an and shape the way we understand it. At friends are watching “Entourage,” … information helps citizens to hold their international manhunt based on sexual *The Gazette* we tell stories too; we tell You’ll buy a brand-new phone, and governments accountable, generates assault allegations, took a twist when the story of this city, of our school and of you’ll just enter your credentials. All your new ideas and encourages creativity” details of the case against him were its students; their ideas, their opinions, friends—and perhaps directions to all while visiting China. In November leaked to the public along with creepy us on follow what they cared about and what they the places you and they have visited the Nobel Peace prize was awarded love letters from his days as a university didn’t, what they won and what they recently—will be right there.” The privacy Liu Xiaobou, a Chinese citizen who student. The man who had used the @dalgazette lost, what happened and what didn’t, policy decisions made by Zuckerberg resisted government censorship. The internet to humiliate the world’s most and what they had to say about that. and the operators of Facebook affect announcement was met with the powerful organization, found himself @gazetteopinions We’ve told this story for a long time, and over 600 million people; if Facebook wide acclaim of liberal democracies as exposed and his privacy just as in our upcoming Archives Issue later were a country it would rank third in and condemnation from the Chinese vulnerable to the public eye. @gazette_arts this month, we hope to share some of population behind India and China. government. Yet it was Hillary Clinton's In a world where mighty institutions those stories from the past with you. This For the 600 million Facebook users, the State Department that lead the calls lose their right to secrecy, so do week we revive our past in a different networking site is the primary interface for Wikileaks to be shut down. What individuals. way by publishing a modest selection between them as private individuals happened? —JT LSAT MCAT of student-written fiction in our paper. and their controlled public identity. A final point of interest in the Wikileaks Once *The Gazette* regularly published On Facebook we can choose what GMAT GRE short fiction and poetry written by information about us can be known, and students and it is somewhat a point of who can know it. In a sense, our public Preparation Seminars pride that our paper published the early identity is a created one, a version of writing of famous Canadian authors like ourselves that we are comfortable with. • Complete 30-Hour Seminars Lucy Maude Montgomery and Hugh A fiction? We feel entitled to our right • Convenient Weekend Schedule McLennan while they studied here. to control information about ourselves. The news tells a story objectively, about We already share our favourite TV shows • Proven Test-Taking Strategies an external reality, fiction tells stories and places we've been, will we draw the • Experienced Course Instructors subjectively, dealing with an internal or line when Facebook can share what TV • Comprehensive Study Materials created reality. The notion of mixing we're watching or where we are in real fiction with the news no doubt ruffles time? • Simulated Practice Exams feathers of purists on both sides, and To use a Facebook analogy, the leaked • Limited Class Size yet events in the past few months have diplomatic cables were the equivalent of given new reason for us to think about Wikileaks posting unflattering photos • Free Repeat Policy the relation between fiction and the of the State Department and making • Personal Tutoring Available media in a different way. The controversy them impossible to untag. As soon as • Thousands of Satisfied Students surrounding the release of classified the documents began to be published diplomatic cables by Wikileaks has a global effort to silence Wikileaks drew brought the idea access to information battle-lines which forshadow a coming OXFORD SEMINARS in the Information Age to the forefront struggle for control of information, of public debate. At the heart of the both in the media and on the internet. 1-800-269-6719 matter is the question of how much On one side were governments and 416-924-3240 the public needs to know about how corporations fighting to protect their www.oxfordseminars.ca institutions acting on its behalf operate. secrecy, on the other side individuals Regardless of whether the public has fighting for their right to know. What the right to learn the content of the State right to do institutions acting on behalf NEED POSTERS Department's internal communications, of individuals have to keep secrets from Wikileaks has taught us is that evermore them? How can we ensure our interest FOR YOUR WALLS? readily accessible information may are being respected when we are kept COME TO THE COOLEST come at the price of the privacy of both from the truth? Is there such a thing a institutions and individuals. necessary fiction? POSTER SHOP IN HALIFAX! In an interview in September, Mark A year ago, while on an official visit WE HAVE 1000'S Zuckerberg told the New Yorker that his to China, Hillary Clinton spoke of the TO CHOOSE FROM MUSIC • MOVIES VINTAGE 1. Frank by name, frank by nature Sasha Downer, News 2. Hey Mormon brethren would you like a free Nietzche book? Nick Wright, Opinions 3. Safe phone sex Niko Bell, Sex Collective 4. O’Neill takes the heat The Art Expo Samantha Durnford, News 492 7128 5. Bagelgate explained Park Lane Mall (next to the theatres) Paige Macpherson, Opinions • • • Illustration by Aaron Manczyk 4 January 7 - January 13, 2011 • news

news news covers Dalhousie and the greater Halifax community. Contributions are welcome! E-mail Samantha at [email protected] news. Samantha Durnford News Editor University food banks: needed but unnoticed Monica Riehl lack of need. Post-secondary students, from participating hotels and hospitals. News Contributor burdened with high tuition costs, are Donations that Dalhousie food bank a group that struggles to afford a basic receives from Feed Nova Scotia is not It is not supposed to be a secret, but nutritious diet. pre-selected so students can load one judging by the minimal traffic, it is The HungerCount survey shows that grocery bag—or more depending on relatively unknown that several post- 1.1 per cent of over 790,000 Canadians their needs - with the items they want. secondary institutions in Nova Scotia that needed food bank assistance in SMU's food bank has its own way of have food banks. 2009 were students relying on student doing things. There are five university food banks loans for income. Just before the "We've shifted more towards the in Metro Halifax. Four are member holidays, when student loans are drying giving of grocery cards because then agencies of Feed Nova Scotia and up,food banks typically see an increase the students get what they want," says receive most food donations from in student clientele. Father Hendricks. this charitable distribution centre. The Nova Scotia Participatory Food He says that about 80 per cent of One university—Saint Mary's—operates Security Projects studies the needs of the donations for the food bank are independently. people living in Nova Scotia and the monetary. Previously they would go out Approximately 8,500 students attend cost of food based on Health Canada's and buy food to stock the food bank. SMU, but its food bank only helps National Nutritious Food Basket They saw the gift cards as a way to around 10 to 15 students each month. (NNFB). The NNFB lists 66 foods used meet the needs of students and allow "We need to do a better job at to calculate the cost of a basic nutritious them to buy fresh milk, meat, fruits and marketing ourselves," says Father Randy diet for 23 age groups and genders. vegetables. Hendricks, who runs SMU's food bank The project identifies university Feed Nova Scotia says there are times located in the chaplaincy office. students with children as the most when they also provide gift vouchers for Dalhousie University's student union vulnerable people in the province that food, but not typically. stepped up the promotion of its food struggle with basic nutrition. Last year's "If any particular food bank has the bank this year, and vice-president figures indicate that this group would opportunity to do that, I think that's internal Kayla Kurin says there has been require $673.62 per month to meet wonderful," says Theriault. an increase. NNFB needs, but has only $251.90 Students in need can visit SMU's But Dalhousie's food bank only assists for groceries after expenses. This puts chaplaincy office for a $25 gift card for around 100 students each month during students with families potentially $421.72 groceries. Cards are given once a month the school year (30 per month during in debt each month, and makes it very with basic identification. difficult to provide a healthy diet. Father Hendricks says this system Father Hendricks runs the indepedent SMU food bank. • • • Photo by Monica Riehl the summer months of May through August) out of its approximate 15,500 Help from Feed NS evolved in the last term "because full and part-time students. Its location Feed Nova Scotia helps anyone we have to be good stewards of our is somewhat challenging to find in the experiencing food insecurity in the resources." But he says they don't ask basement of the SUB building, past the province. It distributes over two million a lot of questions, or require additional bookstore and with no obvious signage. kilograms of food each year to member information, even if the person in need is not a student. Meeting the need agencies, and it organizes donations based on Canada's Food Guidelines to "It's mainly students, but sometimes Father Hendricks hopes that setting up someone else will come in and we will a booth at school next year will help let help provide healthy diets. "We are really fortunate to get fresh try to help, or connect them to the right students know about the food bank. place." If necessary, he would seek out more items," says Karen Theriault at Feed funding to meet increased demand. Nova Scotia. An earlier version of this story appeared "If we are not aware of a need, we She says 854,000 kilograms of food first at the university news website, can't meet the need." distributed is non-perishable. Perishable unews.ca. Unews is published by The low number of university food items amounts to 1,044,000 kilograms University of King's College journalism bank clients is not an indication of a and 46,000 kilograms is prepared food students in their final year. Food bank use increasing among students nationwide Ali Churchill hampers designed to supply four days' Bank and the financial aid information The Gateway worth of food. centers on campus. University of Alberta While in previous years students were “We make sure that students know able to make enough money during the about these other tools, other than just EDMONTON (CUP) — New national summer months to support themselves student debt, that are available to them numbers are showing that more and in the school year, Siebert points to the if they're really struggling and unable more students are turning to food banks recent slump in the job market as a to make ends meet,” she said, citing to make it through the semester. major reason for the increase in food bursaries and access funds as other The HungerCount, Canada's only bank use over the past few years. means of support. annual survey on food bank use Seibert explained that there is usually One of the food bank's former clients, nationwide, recently published new a jump in usage in September and who wished to remain anonymous, statistics showing that 71 per cent of October while people are waiting for spoke highly of the Campus Food Canadian food banks saw an increase of student loans to come in. In addition, Bank's role on campus. “The food bank nine per cent between March 2009 and she said the end of winter semester can provides people with the opportunity March 2010, with almost 870,000 people be a busy time. to focus on school. They helped me turning to food banks in March 2010. “People access our services as they manage the stress of not knowing what I This rise is reflected on campus, where start to deplete their resources at the was going to eat for the next week,” the the recession is putting pressure on end of the semester,” Seibert said. “We third-year education student said. students already burdened by tuition have traditionally seen a spike in both Citing financial problems as his reason fees and the cost of living. users and in donations, which is great for turning to the food bank, the student Ashley Seibert, executive director of because it balances each other out.” said he was unaware of a stigma against the University of Alberta's Campus Food At the U of A, 29 per cent of students food bank use, but admitted to being Bank, explained that food bank use is using the food bank in the 2009-2010 self-conscious when he first came to the increasing faster on campus than the year relied on student loans as their food bank. national average. Between 2008-2009 primary income, while The HungerCount Seibert is optimistic that the release of and 2009-2010, there was a 20 per cent reports that 1.6 per cent of Canadian these statistics by The HungerCount and increase in campus food bank usage. households nationwide are relying on the media attention to the increase will student loans as a primary income. do much to reduce the stigma attached Last year more than 2,000 students used UofA’s campus food bank. Last year, more than 2,000 students • • • Photo by Pau Balite used the food bank, which provides Seibert said that this has led to a close to using food banks on campus. partnership between the Campus Food • January 7 - January 13, 2011 5 news Dal Law changes degree name Seven King's students Lisa Delaney program's identity, saying, “this change News Contributor reflects the Americanization of Toronto, plagiarized on term essay and the Torontoization of the rest of On Jan. 10 the Dalhousie Senate will Canada.” discuss whether to change the name of Former graduates of the school who School wonders how to prevent it from happening again their first-level law degree. hold an LL.B. are able to have their The Schulich Law School's Faculty degree converted to the J.D. if they so Council sent a recommendation to the choose. Senate ratified on March 12, 2010 that Despite the concerns of former and their Bachelor of Laws (LL.B.) be desig- current students, the recommendation nated instead as a Juris Doctor (J.D.). passed under the argument that the J.D. Proponents of the switch argue that the designation would better prepare stu- change will better align Dalhousie’s law dents for work in law outside of Canada. program with international standards. In most countries, students with only Before the council’s recommenda- a high-school education are eligible to tion was made, law school alumni were apply for LL.B. designated programs. surveyed on their opinion of the change. This is not the case in Canada. Canadian Among students who graduated admission requirements for both the between 2001 and now, 59.8 per cent LL.B. and J.D. programs require at least favored the switch. Despite the majority some undergraduate education from vote, the decision did not come with- applicants. out contention. Those who graduated Members of the Canadian legal com- from Dalhousie’s law program before munity argue that the LL.B. program 1961 were, in contrast, opposed to the lacks the prestige warranted by a gradu- change: only 25 per cent voted in favour ate law degree. In 2001 when the Univer- of it. sity of Toronto changed their designa- A second-year Schulich student, who tion, those in favour of the J.D. argued asked to remain nameless to protect his that the new degree was more aligned academic credibility, believes that the with the level of education received by change is artificial. students. Since no actual changes to the pro- Currently, ten of Canada’s fifteen gram have been made, he says “it accredited law schools have changed appears to have more to do with satisfy- their primary degree from an LL.B. to a ing vanity than satisfying clients.” J.D. and the University of Windsor is the He also said the change affects the only school that holds a dual LL.B/J.D. program. Law Faculty Degree Law Faculty Degree U of Alberta LL.B Queen's J.D. UBC J.D. Saskatchewan J.D. U of Calgary J.D. U of Toronto J.D. U of Manitoba LL.B U of Victoria J.D.

The Internet has made the boundaries of plagiarism harder to define. • • • Photo by Katrina Pyne McGill LL.B Western J.D. Katrina Pyne the seven accused students. committed academic offences. U of Ottawa J.D. Windsor LL.B/J.D. Staff Contributor However, Heller says that they treated “We are an educational institute, we’re Osgoode (York) J.D. it as any other first plagiarism offence. not police. We are here to educate, not A recent plagiarism outbreak at the “We would never expel someone for to punish,” says Bohan. Hoffer a College of Sustainability University of King’s College has faculty a first offence unless maybe they were “People have to remember that these Research Assistant. more worried about the reaction than running a plagiarism ring.” cases are confidential. Nothing is certain news briefs “(The contract end) presents an the plagiarism itself. For both Dalhousie and King’s the yet and I think people really jumped the opportunity for the university to work In early December, seven students in hearings for first time offences have an gun,” says Mann. with students and employees to improve the King's Foundation Year Programme educational value to them. Every offence King’s currently does not require Free Commons skating the sustainability and quality of food A free, outdoor, public ice rink has (FYP) were accused of plagiarizing on an is treated on an individual basis involving students to submit to Turnitin.com, a services even further and to respond to opened in Halifax. essay due two days after their mid-term the academic integrity officer working company which detects plagiarism the concerns of students, employees The Dalplex says skating is a great evaluations. closely with the student and instructor. electronically by comparing student and food service providers." Peggy Heller is the director of FYP a work against their database. Heller says exercise to start off the new year. Anne comprehensive program attended by that they are considering using Turnitin. Leblanc, fitness coordinator, says that Former student dies Alex Zolpis, who graduated in all first-year King's students. She says com as a tool in the future. skating is great for students to create “We are an December from Dalhousie, passed she was appalled to hear the comments “I’m sure just having Turnitin.com as balance, work muscles and maintain away over Christmas break at the age of students and faculty members who an option would discourage students their fitness level. educational of 24. Zolpis was killed in a parking lot wanted to see the students expelled from plagiarism, but the idea of putting The speed skating oval was built for accident which involved his long time even before the disciplinary hearings. students through a security checkpoint is the Canada Games and is available institute, we’re friend Jack Tobin. After Heller made an announcement humiliating,” says Heller. to skate until the Games. Hundreds of Tobin faces three charges, including to the FYP class on Dec. 3 about the Heller says that many people were people are skating each day. Check the not the police.” two impaired driving charge and one accusations, a King's student-run worried about the school’s reputation. HRM website for details. dangerous driving charge. Currently he magazine The Watch posted on Twitter “Every university has problems —Meaghan Philpott is out on $100,000 bond. that “over twenty first-year students “The way that Dalhousie and King’s with plagiarism. The fact that we too News Contributor Friends remember Zolpis as “bright” found to have plagiarized the most deal with plagiarism is quite unique, experience problems should not be and say he always had a big smile on his recent FYP essay. More information as innovative and fair,” says Bob Mann, surprising,” she says. Sustainable food at Dal face. we find out.” manager of discipline and appeals at Heller says it is the added pressures The College of Sustainability at Later, both The Watch and Unews. Dalhousie. “We see it as an educational of getting into grad schools that may be Dalhousie has released a report with Energy drinks+alcohol ca, another King's publication, carried opportunity.” causing students to resort to plagiarism. recommendations for Dalhousie's food Researchers at Dalhousie have released stories on the allegations. The Unews The Senate Discipline Committee “Nowadays it's hard to screw-up,” services. a study investigating drinking patterns story was picked up by the Macleans Annual Report for 2009-2010 showed says Heller. “Computers generate a The report, "Food Services and the when alcohol and caffeinated energy OnCampus blog. that the majority of students facing number grade that represents you when Dalhousie Community: sustainability, drinks, such as Red Bull, are put together. “It became such a public thing allegations of plagiarism were in their you are applying to grad schools, and it situation analysis and policy recomm- They interviewed 70 Dal students and through the media that it made it hard first and second year. seems like that is all they care about.” endations" was released Dec. 13. found that when alcohol is combined for us to deal with it properly,” says The majority of offences would be Heller says that the way plagiarism As Dal's contract with the company with energy drinks, people basically Heller. “It’s not fair to the students.” described as "reckless plagiarism." In cases are dealt with teaches students the that runs food services on campus, doubled their consumption. Heller says the academic integrity these cases, students may have cited boundaries in a far less legalistic setting Aramark, ends in June, the College of They say this might occur as a social processes are nothing new and they incorrectly or borrowed segments of than in previous years. It recognizes that Sustainability has reviewed Dal's current behaviour or the fact that people use should not surprise staff. their writing. This often occurs because students make youthful indiscretions food situation. They did this by not only energy drinks as stimulant. They are still There has been backlash from both students are in a panic or are ignorant of and deserve a second chance. looking at Dal's food services, but also continuing to study the combination, the academic community and the academic standards. “Here at King’s, we think of the essay food services at other campuses. saying it will take more research before media on the way King's has chosen to Margaret Clow Bohan is the manager as a form of communication between They came up with seven key areas they're able to find the exact effects and deal with the issue. Some students have of the Dalhousie writing centre. She students and faculty. Why would you be for improvement “for a more adaptive, causes. felt that the university was too lenient on often works with students who have here if you just wanted to plagiarize?” engaged and sustainable food system.” —Samantha Durnford The report was written by a Rebecca News Editor 6 January 7 - January 13, 2011 • opinions

opinions gazette opinions welcomes any opinion backed up with facts, but we don’t publish rants. E-mail Katie at [email protected] to contribute. opinions. Katie Toth Opinions Editor

Hayley Gray orgasms or no orgasms and still enjoy e Sex Collective presents: The Sex Collective sex; queer female sex doesn’t start at penetration or end at ejaculation. I don’t So bro, you’re in bed with your lady mean to presume that no queer women Dude: stop faking it friend, you have been enjoying each can engage in sex that follows this other’s company, enjoying sex, and it particular paradigm: only that it is viewed You don't need to come to have fun in the sack dawns on you that you are probably as one of many options. not going to reach orgasm. Everything feels great, she’s great, there’s no reason you’re not there: you just ... aren’t. What “Sex is one of the do you do? Well, a recent article in the Globe and few things we do Mail found that, statistically, a quarter of you will fake an orgasm. just because it According to sex therapist and professor Peggy Kleinplatz, there are feels good.” many reasons that people in general— and men specifically—fake orgasms. Pharmacologically, anti-depressants and Applying this to heterosexual sex erectogenic drugs like Viagra have both means moving away from the standard been found to delay orgasms in men. timeline. Sex is one of the few things we Psychologically, men have reported do just because it feels good; why stress feeling a need to finish ‘on time,’ not out about fitting it into a normal sexual only because they are expected to by paradigm? their partners, but sometimes because It’s wintertime, and that means time they are tired, exhausted or just bored. to slow down. Take the time to count Sound familiar, ladies? the freckles on their shoulder, or find out When women fake an orgasm it is where they are sensitive. Find the things considered a commonplace feature of to say that turn them on, and along that sex. We are told that the female orgasm journey, say some ridiculous things. is more complex, that women don’t have If we destroy the narrative that men to climax to enjoy sex. So why do we are all sexually simple creatures lusting expect men to perform this one sex act after orgasms, we will conclude that all to have a complete sexual experience? humans have the capacity for complexity All right, all of you engaging in and simplicity, and that orgasms are not heterosexual sex, it’s time to learn the be-all-end-all of sex for any of us. from queer women. When it comes to Maybe we can all enjoy sex in all forms women-to-women sexual encounters, for what it is--a pleasurable experience. there is not one ultimate sex act; there is Let’s redefine sex as a spectrum, with acts that hit all over the map. Men may fake orgasims because they’re tired or bored. • • • Photos by Marina Bonazzi no single point defining what is sex and what it isn’t. Women can have multiple

David Bush Gaza Conflict,” HRW stated “in certain one of the harshest sustained blockades occasionally bomb targets inside Israel. Staff Contributor Gaza neighborhoods (Izbet Abed in history, effectively making it an open- The conflict is completely unequal. A lament Rabbo, Zeitoun, and Khuza’a) Israeli air prison. Israel demands peace from I am not sure what emotion can be forces destroyed “virtually every home, Some justify this brutality because the Palestinians as a precursor to carried in numbers. factory, and orchard ... indicating an of Hamas, the elected Palestinian negotiations. But by peace it means I am not sure if justice can be found in apparent plan of systematic destruction government. They call Hamas a terrorist passivity and subjugation. Meanwhile in for Gaza in these locations.” organization, bent on killing all the Gaza, the world’s largest open-air prison, cold calculation, but I am tired of those Power imbalance who defend a brutal occupation, and According to Amnesty International Jews in Israel. I have no love for Hamas, they cannot access building materials or dismiss any critic of Israel as anti-Semitic. and anyone with a TV, the Israeli military but Hamas is a product of decades of get sufficient medical or food supplies. lies at heart of the A little over two years ago, Israel shelled a hospital with artillery shells oppression, occupation, and humiliation. As Saeed Bannoura of the International launched an invasion of the Gaza strip containing white phosphorus. This is a The daily brutality of the occupation in Middle East Media Center reports, Israeli-Palestinian called Operation Cast Lead, lasting highly indiscriminate weapon that can the West Bank, the impossibility of the (with access to newly declassified Israeli about three weeks. They killed 1,417 spread over the size a football field. It two-state solution due to settlements, documents) the Israeli government conflict Palestinians, 926 of whom were civilians, can’t be put out with water. When white the inhuman embargo of Gaza and imposed a deliberate policy: and at least 250 of whom were children phosphorus comes in contact with the failure for Israel to recognize its “In which the dietary needs for as well as four or their own Israeli someone, it burns deeply through the legacy of ethnic cleansing in the form of the population of Gaza are chillingly soldiers. They also wounded over 5000 skin, muscles and into the bone and will Palestinians refugee camps has made calculated, and the amounts of food let Palestinians, destroyed 4000 buildings, continue burning until it is deprived of Hamas possible. in by the Israeli government measured (including hospitals and the UN oxygen. What choice do Palestinians have to remain just enough to keep the “Israeli-built compound in Gaza City), and displaced Also according to Amnesty but to resist? Should they just die population alive at a near-starvation roughly 58,000 Palestinians according International, Israel continued its use of silently? Should a legacy of ethnic level. This documents the statement access roads to Palestinian Centre for Human Rights, human shields in the invasion of Gaza. In cleansing, refugee status, occupation, made by a number of Israeli officials that Al Huq (an independent Human Rights one instance Amnesty reports that “for imprisonment, and poverty be they are ‘putting the people of Gaza on strafe across group), the BBC, the Daily Telegraph two days from 5 January, Israeli forces accepted? Would you accept this? a diet.’” and various other human rights groups. held Yousef Abu 'Ida, his wife Leila and Think about it for a moment. Israel, Beyond the numbers, behind the countryside, The minuscule Palestinian armed their nine children as ‘human shields’ a nuclear-armed nation that possesses the reports and the violations of UN resistance, during the same period, in their home in Hay al-Salam, east of one of the world’s strongest armies, resolutions, lie people just like you making the West killed three Israeli civilians, 6 IDF soldiers Jabalia, while they used the house as a occupies the West Bank. It builds and me. They are caught up in game and wounded 518 Israelis of which 186 military position. They then forced the fortresses for colonizers and has flying of oppressed and oppressor. Our Bank resemble were civilians. family out and destroyed the house.” checkpoints. Israel constructed a wall government’s stance that Israel can According to Human Rights Watch, All of this, it must be noted, took that is built beyond an international do no wrong is shameful. But what Swiss cheese.” Israeli forces extensively destroyed civilian place on a piece of land no bigger border, cutting off precious farmland. is happening in Gaza cannot be property, including homes, factories, than two per cent of historic Palestine, Israeli-built access roads, strafe across understood by numbers alone. We must farms, and greenhouses “without any a measly 139 square kilometers. It is the countryside, making the West Bank hear the stories of Palestinians to move lawful military purpose.” In its May 2010 the most densely populated area in the resemble Swiss cheese. It, in short, past the fictions and lies of omission our report entitled “I Lost Everything: Israel’s world. It borders Egypt, Israel and the dominates Palestine. If Palestinians resist media continues to tell. Unlawful Destruction of Property in the Mediterranean. Gaza is subjugated to at all, they fire homemade rockets and • January 7 - January 13, 2011 7 opinions Fiction from the fourth estate Canada, Haiti and Our Media David Bush the harshest dictators in the Western American, Canadian, and French 800 polling stations, compared to the one single mainstream publication in Staff Contributor Hemisphere, Francois 'Papa Doc' troops invaded the country. Aristide, thousands used in previous elections. Canada has reported on the continued Duvalier. 'Papa Doc' and his son, 'Baby who had been begging for some kind There were no polling stations in Cité ban of Fanmi Lavalas from the When the Canadian media relentlessly Doc' Jean-Claude Duvalier, ruled Haiti of assistance from foreign governments Soleil, a riding which was an Aristide November election. Not one editorial churns out news stories about Haiti on by means of a brutal paramilitary force in dealing with the rebellion, was taken supporter stronghold. Supposedly, has called for the return of Aristide, the the anniversary of the devastating Jan. named the Tonton Macoutes. America at gunpoint by American soldiers. He this neglect was due to concerns about last fairly elected President to Haiti. Our 12 earthquake, be skeptical. supplied weapons, training and was made to sign a “resignation” letter violence. The election, taking place media has rarely covered the multiple An obvious racism lies behind our ideological cover. and dumped into the Central African under foreign occupation, was rigged protests against the U.N. occupation media’s depictions of Haiti. Black, In 1990, after years of popular Republic. A cabal of elites and war from the get-go, yet somehow the force that have taken place over the last voodoo-practicing, violent, poor unrest, Haiti elected Jean-Bertrand criminals backed by U.S., Canadian, Canadian media failed to report these 6 years. Instead, our media focuses on Haitians are destined, it would seem, Aristide, the first democratically elected and French Troops then ruled Haiti. facts. the Canadian humanitarian mission in to be part of a failed state due to their president in Haiti. The former Roman The foreign occupying armies and the This oversight would be similar to a Jacamel, or on violent street protests. inherent corruption. Thus, western Catholic priest was quickly deposed subsequent U.N. mission actively helped foreign journalist failing to mention the The media has thus provided ideological nations such as Canada need to rescue by an American-backed coup in 1991. suppress Aristide's Lavalas movement. banning of the Liberal party during a cover for the coup, and prevented a Haitians from “the curse it seems to have Over 4000 dissidents were murdered. Killings, disappearances and jailing of Canadian election. serious public discourse about Canada’s been stuck with for such a long time,” as Furthermore, a slew of International Lavalas’ activists were commonplace. When this sort of corruption occurs in role in Haiti. French President Nicholas Sarkozy said Monetary Fund and World Bank The United Nations Stabilization Burma or Iran, the Canadian media cries The real story at play in Haiti is a days after last year’s earthquake. reforms were implemented that ruined Mission in Haiti, a 10,000-member police, foul, but somehow when it comes to story of democracy and justice denied. This narrative could not be farther the Haitian economy before a brokered military and administrative regime, Haiti, the mainstream media—from the The earthquake that brought untold from the truth. Haiti is the birthplace peace brought Aristide back to power which has an annual budget of $600 CBC to the National Post—are stone- destruction to Haiti has strengthened of universal freedom. The world’s first in 1994. Aristide, who disbanded the million, has been accused of directly and cold silent. the armed grip of traditional elites have successful slave rebellion in 1791 led to military in his first term, left office in 1996 indirectly facilitating political repression Haiti is now in the midst of a counter- over the country with support of the the fulfillment of revolutionary notions and then ran again for President in 2000. in Haiti. In 2005, a report undertaken revolution. The popular upsurge in Canadian government. In response to of equality beyond the wildest dreams He won in what is widely regarded by by Harvard Law Student Advocates the late 1980s and early 1990s which the earthquake, Peter Hallward said that of American and French radicals. the Organization of American States as for Human Rights claimed that the UN gave voice to a majority of Haitians has it had “sharpened and accelerated the Haitian slaves defeated French, British, a free and fair election. stabilization force “effectively provided been widely suppressed with the active basic political choice facing Haiti: either and Spanish armies, challenging racist In 2004, a rebellion led by former cover for the police to wage a campaign help of the Canadian government. A renewal of the popular mobilisation in myths created by Europeans. From Haitian death squad leaders, business of terror in Port-au-Prince’s slums.” small number of privileged families are pursuit of equality and justice, or long- the moment of its freedom, Haiti was a elites and convicted war criminals With the support of the United wealthier and more powerful now than term confirmation of the island's current pariah nation subjugated to blockades, marched on Port-au-Prince, Haiti's Nations Stabilization Mission, Haiti’s ever before. They also stand to gain status as a neo-colonial protectorate.” ransom and invasion. capital. They were armed with American- elite government ran a rigged election the most from the reconstruction. The So when the media asks you to In the early 20th century Haiti was made M16 rifles. As political philosopher in 2006. Fourteen parties including the dreaded military institutions, disbanded feel pity for the victims of Haiti’s invaded and brutally occupied by Peter Hallward has noted, “the defining biggest political party in Haiti, Fanmi by Aristide, have come creeping back. earthquake, don’t. Instead, feel rage American troops. The occupation was event of contemporary Haitian politics Lavalas, were barred from participation. Over a million people are still homeless about our government’s role in Haiti justified by racist depictions of Haitians remains the intervention that was The Canadian government funded this in Haiti, without any voice in how and our media’s silence about it. Justice as ‘uncivilized.’ designed to restore long-term ‘security’ sham election to the tune of a million reconstruction will unfold. demands it. After the occupation, America by killing off the Lavalas mobilisation dollars. The Canadian media has failed to played a key role in supporting one of once and for all: the coup of 2004.” In the 2006 election there were only report basic facts about Haiti. Not e Sex Collective presents: Paps for all! Cervical health is crucial, no matter your gender identity or sexual orientation Katie Toth haven't had real (vaginal, penetrative) Of course, physical discomfort is Lawson also recommends that a positive space in which to get a pap The Sex Collective sex.” Actually, according to Ontario's not the only reason why some people doctors “explain step by step ahead of test, call the Halifax Sexual Health Centre clinical practice guidelines for evidence- hate paps. “It's an incredibly vulnerable what they’re doing, what’s coming next in advance and make an appointment. Do you have a cervix? Then at some based cancer care, you do. Ladies and situation,” Lawson acknowledges. ... When we know what the purpose is, Tell your doctor what needs you have, point, you should probably be getting female-bodied folks who have sex with People who don't usually receive frontal then we're like: ‘okay, I get that.’” and when you make your appointment, a pap test. ladies are at risk for HPV infection. On penetration, or who have had negative Since you're already going to tell the office manager if you want to It's a simple ultimatum, really. Yet check-it-out.ca, The Rainbow Health experiences with penetration in the past, the doctor's office for that pap, why see a male or female gynecologist. If myths and cultural fictions continue to Coalition of Ontario notes that HPV “is may also have emotional baggage to not ask your doctor about the HPV you're not sure whether you need a pap keep female-bodied people in the dark transmitted through genital skin-to-skin bring to the experience. vaccine? Consider giving your body the test, ask a health care professional you about their own health needs. contact through anyone who has the Finally, the power imbalance between antibodies that will allow it to fight the trust and respect. When you don't ask, A pap test is a minor procedure virus—this includes oral sex, sex with a doctor and patient can sometimes infection that can cause cervical cancer you don't get. It's your body: nobody is performed by a health professional in fingers or hands, genital rubbing and make people even more uncomfortable to happen in the first place. As Lawson going to protect it for you. which he or she swabs your cervix to vaginal sex with toys.” with the idea of getting a pap. notes, “lots and lots of people have HPV check for abnormal cell growth, quickly Lawson recommends that both and they don't know it. So it's not like detecting signs of pre-cancerous cervical health care professionals and patients they even know that they're giving it to changes before they become more “When you let act proactively to make the experience you.” Teach English challenging to treat. Cervical cancer is a safe one. If you're going to get a pap Female-bodied folks can have suspected to be the result of a strain of other people's test, do a little reading, find out what the emotional reasons for not feeling HPV, human papilloma virus—another purpose is, why are you having it, what's comfortable with paps, and both Abroad strain of which causes genital warts. HPV ignorance stand it all about. Taking a shower before your doctors and health administrators is spread through sexual contact. appointment may help you feel more need to work to make people more While guidelines vary over when in the way of comfortable with your body. Also, be comfortable. But this editorial is not a people who have never had sex should aware that if you know in advance that critical analysis of how to make health get pap tests—some professional your health, you you are going to have your period, you care more accessible. recommendations say a woman should should try to postpone the appointment, That's because ultimately, while TESOL/TESL Teacher Training get her first pap test at 18, while others are letting the as it is not as easy to detect cancerous making spaces safe for all women and Certification Courses say you can wait until the age of 25. cells when the uterus is shedding. trans folks to get paps is crucial, the However, many doctors agree that terrorists win.” Health care professionals should be bureaucrats building those structures • Intensive 60-Hour Program regular cervical screening should begin fully aware that “any medical procedure, aren't going to be the ones dying • Classroom Management Techniques soon after the onset of sexual activity. but particularly one like that, needs to be of cervical cancer while waiting for • Detailed Lesson Planning Sex therapist and registered nurse done with such respect.” As a patient of safer spaces to be built. Should our Ideas about what ‘sexual contact’ • ESL Skills Development Camille Lawson notes that a key reason a male doctor, you have a right to ask community work to keep everyone means (not to mention health clinics • Comprehensive Teaching Materials and waiting rooms) can be fraught with that women put off getting pap tests is for a female nurse to be present, and healthy? Sure. But until that happens, the • Interactive Teaching Practicum heteronormativity, leaving many queer a perpetuated sense of unease. “Girls you want them there as a third party, “so onus is on you to take care of yourself. women, straight women who haven't hear their mother saying ‘oh, I have to you're not setting up that kind of power When you let other people's cruelty, • Internationally Recognized Certificate had penile penetration, and trans men get my pap test ... I dread it.’ When really hierarchy.” ignorance, homophobia or sexism stop • Teacher Placement Service all unsure about whether they apply. ... a decent enough doctor is going to You can also ask if you want a friend or you from getting the health care you • Money-Back Guarantee Included An all-too-common misconception warm up the speculum, and it's not that family member to be in the room with deserve, you are letting the terrorists win. • Thousands of Satisfied Students is that “you don't need a pap if you painful.” you during the test. So, if you are concerned about finding OXFORD SEMINARS 1-800-269-6719/416-924-3240 www.oxfordseminars.ca 8 January 7 - January 13, 2011 • opinions

PERCEPTIVE PAL To ask for Generations don't exist anymore There's a new advice PAL’s PERCETION, email your problems to There's no unifying culture, columnist in town! [email protected] just many disparate communities Paalini Sathiyaseelan the fact that he has made it obvious to Kadie Smith Generations are organized along lines fingertips that it becomes hard to unify Opinions Contributor everyone that he is married just means The Martlet of age and common cultural signifiers, our voice and our identity. We want so that he has made himself clear that he is University of Victoria things and events that defined and badly to connect to one another, but Dear Pal, not interested. Stating that his marriage shaped their childhoods and identities. there is no single generation—there are is a problem for you shows that deep The margins are wide. Baby Boomers a million. down you realize that this relationship VICTORIA (CUP) — When The Who I think I’m in love—with my professor! sang “My Generation” in 1965, it was are considered those born in the mid- Cultural signifiers and monumental Every time we speak, I'm awed by his isn’t going to work out. All you needed ’40s to mid-’60s, and Gen-Xers are those events define generations. The was a confirmation. Reflect on what you clear who they were singing to: that brilliance and allure. The only disillusioned generation raised in a post– born in the mid-’60s to early ’80s. computer manages to be both, while problem: he's married. I know that if I feel, and ask yourself honestly: If you did So what about us? We are said to changing every day. I bought my laptop make the ‘right moves,’ and he fell for Second World War era, bred under fear just made the right moves, he would of the Cold War and nourished on the belong to Generation Y, born in the two years ago for $1,000; today it is worth fall for me, but I don’t want to be a you, would you like to be one to stand early ’80s to mid-’90s. We are defined by less than half that amount. Tomorrow it and watch a family fall apart? anti-Vietnam agenda. homewrecker. What should I do? The delineation was clear. The coddling parents, rap music, computers could be obsolete. With candour, As for him, he should know that dating and the Internet, and most importantly, We get a new generation every year a student is unethical. The power connection was strong. When Roger —In Fatuated Daltrey hissed out, “Why don’t you all the advancement of technology. with each new step forward: The gamer imbalance in play means that even if the There’s no denying that we have just as generation, the cellphone generation, relationship is consensual it is not a fair just f-f-fade away?” it was clear that he Dear IF, drew a line between his generation and many fears and uncertainties as the Baby the iPod generation, the wireless relationship. It is also against Dalhousie Boomers—maybe even more. There’s generation, the MySpace and Facebook University policy for a professor to date the old one. It is in female nature to seek a male of They are the Baby Boomers. What also no denying that we live in a “me” generation. In a society where computer superior status and maturity with whom one of his or her current students. culture of greed and consumerism. capacity doubles and prices halve every I understand it is hard to push away your connected them? My mother tells me it to mate, because these qualities are was the common sense of fear: The fear But what explains this feeling of 18 months, how can we expect to feel essential for her protection and survival. feelings, especially when you will have to disconnect amongst us? connected to anything but the “right see him often, so don’t burden yourself. of school emergency drills and hiding In layman’s terms, it is totally common under desks as if that could save them The rapid advancement of the now”? to fall for your professor! So don’t be If you feel that it is almost impossible for computer age and Internet domination I long for that generational unity we you to keep them to yourself and it is in case of nuclear war and the fear that ashamed or feel guilty about how you it wasn’t so safe and the government has left us in a one-too-many-so-I- don’t have. I crave that connection with are feeling. Enjoy the feeling and take affecting your progress in class, open up choose-none scenario. We see and those of my age group. I want that to your professor. Talk to him about your didn’t always know best. it as an inspiration to excel in class, but Even the later generation, the Gen- experience everything in a second, on a definable identity that my mother had, do not act on it. Pursuing your feelings problem and it might open up some global scale—natural disasters, Katrina, that feeling of belonging, of a group of new doors in handling this situation. Xers, seemed to have a clear delineation. would only bring about trouble for you, They were the MTV generation, born 9/11, the crash of the housing market, millions brought together under one for him and for his family. Best of luck, Barack Obama, SARS and the avian word: Generation. After all, it's hard to —Pal and raised on grunge music and the Professors are taught to deal with economic boom of the ’80s, Watergate flu. Every event is felt, and felt differently imagine The Who singing, “Talkin’ ’bout phenomena like student crushes, and and greed. by each person. There is such a wealth my raw food movement.” of information and opinion at our literal iPods killed the mixed tape Fact: Dragging and dropping into a playlist not as romantic

Sheldon Boucher significant other, you let her know that need for CD players in vehicles. The Brunswickan you spent at least a few hours thinking of We are now so unfamiliar with the University of New Brunswick her. If you were going to go through the process of making a compilation that trouble of transferring music onto a tape, the mere idea of doing it makes us FREDERICTON (CUP) — Remember you were going to do it well. uncomfortable. We have romanticized those dismal days back when you could Some of that compiling magic was them to such outrageous proportions be mobile with only one CD at a time? retained when we started burning CDs. that it has become impossible for us to If you were unlucky, your player didn’t But once it was possible to rip all your use them as a real source of romance. even have anti-skip. Or think back even music onto your computer, making a CD Once we romanticize something as farther into the annals of history when was only a matter of clicking, dragging culturally incendiary as the mixed tape, cassettes were in vogue. and dropping. The process became we can no longer accept it as normal If you are like me, the thought of not vacuous, and our significant others relationship behaviour. It becomes having an omnipresent library of music suffered. laughable. organized to your tastes should be As recordable CDs became cheap Except in John Cusack movies about troublesome. We listen to a lot of music. ubiquitous items, we became sloppy lists, the mixed tape is an art lost to the It is as important to us as it has ever absent-minded drones, at least with our netherworld. We are able to shuffle been and we get cranky when we can’t capacity to put together a thoughtful list through music libraries so rapidly on update our iPods. But mixed tapes are of songs. We did not (and do not) need our iPods that the process of making no longer part of our musical dialogue. to feverishly rifle through music seeking a compilation, even for ourselves, AU student Kristy in Edmonton, AB Back when Charlie Sheen was still perfection when we could make a CD becomes impractical. Yes, our desire acting in movies, if you wanted a every 10 minutes, and throw them away for convenience and practicality has compilation, you had to record onto just as fast. eclipsed our romantic intuitions. a cassette. Shuffling through records, In the age of Apple, we have managed Many people reading this have taking time to transfer the songs to to squeeze out the mixed CD’s last gasp probably made mixed tapes for their cassette and writing out all the track of air. By relying on MP3 players more girlfriends or boyfriends, and I apologize Finish. names by hand could be a painstaking and more, we have begun to distance if this reads like an attack on your efforts. and time-consuming process. But it was ourselves from the album form. For most I am not able to claim any expertise in You may not have done as well something that was done unabashedly of us, when we buy an album it gets this category myself. But next time your ripped into iTunes and transferred onto relationship goes sour and you need on your exams as you hoped, by hopeful romantics. our iPods. This is a perfectly acceptable something to blame, point your finger at but with transfer credits from To your special-friend, that effort was obvious—and it was always for thing to do, but we are also making the the auspicious iPod. But don’t forget to Athabasca University, you can a special-friend, wasn't it? Simply by album form less and less familiar to us. update it first. pick up the classes you need to virtue of handing that tape over to your The iPod has even taken care of our complete your degree. AU offers over 700 courses delivered online and at a distance, many with the flexibility of monthly start dates. Let AU help you finish your degree in record time.

Learn more at www.athabascau.ca. • January 7 - January 13, 2011 9 fictions special

fictions Jenna Harvie is the Editor-in-Chief Fathom, Dalhousie's Undergraduate Creative Writing Journal: [email protected] • • • Illustrations by Aaron Manczyk to contribute. fictions. Jenna Harvie Fictions Editor Kyria Eleison By Sam Zucchi

For fear that this might be mistaken for a love story, I will not begin with her name. But now I can say it any identification she might have carried, which led to a delay in the identification of the body. Of course, aloud – Kyria! – and relish its sound, how the soft inconstancy of that first demi-vowel imparts upon the all this was told to me far less eloquently, and with much more weeping. I offered bare condolences which rest of the word a breathy quality, soft as the slow smoky soul of incense. No, the reason this story should were quickly washed away, hung up, and walked over to the rabble of liquor bottles I had accumulated not be treated with reference to romance is because I did not love her. I broke up with her three days ago. over the past few months, wondering which to drink – not in celebration, but in commemoration. Let that be my absolution in this affair. Again, I did not love her, my interest was strictly physical. And she was gorgeous: short boyish blond I was sitting on a park bench, looking upwards, watching the setting sun leech gold from the sky, and hair that gathered towards one side of her soft, rounded, almost cherubic face, and curved just enough how darkened leaves pooled atop this dying display, their shades gathered by ethereal eddies I could to allow a few strands to remain tucked beneath her chin. The rest of her was thin, a faint russet, and not see, when she texted me, “wanna go out 2nite.” I had no idea if it was a question or a statement. marked by a pair of f-holes tattooed on her back – a favored euphemism was ‘playing her violin’ – and I assumed the former, and was distracted from my usual distaste for her textual abuse by wondering an inked arabesque hovering just above her navel. But this beauty could not eclipse her bathos beliefs in where the missing question mark had gone. true love and the understanding it was acceptable to text in broken English. Forgive me my distraction. I I had been meaning to leave her, though to actually say so in her presence was difficult to reconcile with chose the scotch. the hope for a kiss – and what might follow. Now I was presented with an opportunity to speak safe from I walked over to the sliver of sunlight that was waxing crescent on the tabletop and placed the half- distraction. I texted back, “No.” empty glass in its center, hoping to recreate the image of the uprooted and abandoned glass of wine. Her response came a few seconds later, “wat y?” complete with the missing mark’s twin. Immediately I wished I had taken the time to add ice, and imagined how beautifully the crystals would “Because I’m ending this.” have caught and cradled the light: its amber shadow, already dappled with rich and mellow nebulae of “Srsly??” At last! chocolate coalescing and dissipating against the old white of the tabletop, would have looked striking if Then I hesitated, wondering if it was wrong to sacrifice clarity for the sake of a dramatic finale, only for the distorting presence of a few islands of caramel clarity. I turned for my camera, my freezer, saying, “Yes. Not now, and never again,” instead of, “We’re over,” before deciding it wasn’t worth the when the phone rang again. contemplation and sending whatever. Now my memories begin to lose their focus: at St. Sebastian’s I kept with * * * Kyria’s family, avoiding the friends that blamed me for her death. I was awakened the next day by a call from Kyria’s mother. She wanted to know if I knew where her At the graveyard I stood next to her mother and falsely promised daughter or her car was, as neither had come home last night. that I would stay in touch. Afterwards I accepted a ride home She wasn’t answering her phone, and so on until I groaned my from some nameless relative. And I spent the darker part of ignorance, saying that I had stayed in all night. the night hunched atop my bed, gargoyle-like, watching a It was only after I had hung up that I noticed the glass of vodka – with the all-important ice! – sit before an early morning sunlight loitering over the remains of last open window. I hoped that whatever meager moonlight that night’s activities. The wine glass was resting on its side, might make its way past the city’s insomniac glare would leaving a crust of rich red resin to draw rubies from the light up the liquid, that starlight might tinge it silver. light. If I looked carefully I could see the wan bands that While waiting for my eyes to adjust to the darkness marked the liquid’s slow descent, and, closer, where the I turned my thoughts towards Kyria, and how strange it was lip had been smudged by my kiss. I drank the sight for a that I could treat with such disdain a girl who had lain in my few minutes before reaching for my camera, and turned bed five nights ago, whose cup still lay unwashed in my its polyphemean eye to the light only to see that it had sink, who had stopped by three nights ago to ask why moved on, leaving what once was numinous merely a and had then driven off unanswered at the urgings nuisance to be cleaned. of her friends, leaving a license plate alone in the Two hours later I learned that Kyria was dead. She lamplight. had driven home drunk with two of her mates Again, I did not love her. I realized I was and had entwined her car around a particularly suddenly out of vodka, and picked up both wallet resilient tree. A minor incident earlier in the and car keys before leaving my apartment and night had rid her of her rear license plate, while the wan specter of moonlight that danced the accident had disfigured both the front and around my empty glass. 10 January 7 - January 13, 2011 • fi ctions special  e Story of Grenthor of Has Memo To Your World By Jenna Harvie A Fllongian epic in 306 words A crisp autumn leaf is picked up and carried through a pair of rusted ebony gates, and swept across a gravel pathway that leads deeper into an obscure cemetery. By Dylan Matthias Tall fraying maples are scattered throughout the sanctuary, filled with faded leaves that from time to time flee and fall to the ground. Grand arms stretch out Grenthor the Fllong stood on the bridge of the Zssally and surveyed the situation. The Zertyons were taking up a typical Pghier from the body of the trees and shield the precious graves from outside harm. formation—he'd seen it before at the great verang of Has three Fllong-years prior. Row upon row of tombstones rest underneath the ocean of decay, like a colony of “Grhggegra,” grunted Grenthor to his bridge Hmerts, a calmness pervading his voice. All the Hmerts were attentive now, sleeping bats. ready for battle. Grenthor's commands carried great respect, maybe due to the filigence of his phootler, or the authority in As the leaf is carried further into the chasm it falls from its path and lands in a the way he murtled his foranges. All was silent, although the Fllong ggerles meant a slight buzzing constantly pervaded the puddle at a crossroad. It rests upon the damp soil and stares straight up towards the phootlers of both Grenthor and all his bridge Hmerts. canopy of leaves, but an unearthly Christ distorts its vision of a crystal world. The Zssally accelerated and the main zerwacklers glowed beige and then alternately yellow-green with Fzon energy. The A pale, limp, corpse hangs above the innocent leaf, its contorted arms pulled slight ggerles-buzzing was replaced by a thunderous noise as the Zertyons zammled their way across Has to meet the Zssally. out to either side with five broad ropes tied to five burly trees on the edges of “Croom Vergirioth, meni morka!” screamed the Zertyon Vinnick over the VLEKELV system. A great buzz went up from the the crossroad. Its dark hair crawled down a perfect canvas and clung to perfect Zssally's bridge Hmerts as they saffled their ggerles' excitedly. breasts. Two tracks of once prospering rivers And now they were upon them. of blood ran down the front of the “Hgertgeg, hgertgeg,” said Grenthor to his Hmerts, motioning downwards with a free forange. The Zssally rocked with the body and stained its ivory skin. impact of Fzon cannons. Its head hung to the side, with “Mlahet! Vinnick!” phootled Zorbaxes, Grenthor's Hmert Zg-Kech. a once beautiful face almost “Hgertgeg!” yelled Grenthor urgently, steadying Zorbaxes with a phootler inversion. “Qwig, qwig—dzvet Zgin purt.” hidden from the world. Its The Zssally flammooed around, using the newest formation from the Fllong Sylveracka deployment. Their Fzon cannons icy eyes were wide, and flared and the Vergirioth glowed ultra-yellow from the barrage. stared towards the Earth, “Grhggegra voons!” cried Grenthor in a rage of passion that all the Zssally— gazing upon a symbol no, all of Has—heard. The voons flew from the Zssally to the Vergirioth sketched between the and a mighty cheer went up from the Hmerts as the Zertyons turned five trees, connecting noolit and ran. Zorbaxes even leapt out of his voluptuous ccilic. It was each one to the other. ecstasy. Has was free. And not a sound In the coming Fllong-years, the Zssally cmmerped its continuing could be heard within mission and brought filigence and phootler inversion to many new the haven, except for worlds. the gentle scraping of a In Fllong-year 234.44 (that being the exact number of years crisp autumn leaf as it since the terrible Sgfract Verang which had caused the Zertyons to is picked up from the rebel) the Zssally cmmerped a vdnick called Earth. seeping puddle and The colonization was a complete success and completely pushed towards an revolutionized the underground Fllong colonies on the planet— exit. biological conversion rates skyrocketed in the first six years. Many of the crew of the Zssally decided to settle down here and some even left service. Zorbaxes, for instance, retired early and came into a very lucrative consulting contract in showbiz and untitled I was able to spin that into riches for several Fllong-years. Grenthor, for his part, decided to continue his diplomatic mission and led a very successful foray into groundhog the silence hurts me the most. society, where he is now in semi-retirement, serving as an I feel empty and full, each time you take. embassy head. resentment and unfinished sentences, He remains in contact with many of his Hmerts, who still look up to him as a Wweba-figure. By all reports, his sit on my tongue. exclusive subterreanean pool-side parties are to die for. this is the cycle.

and I, willingly return with each chime.   I hate this. English Patient untitled II By Leslie Gallagher I want you and I want your eyes Telling someone you're studying English can be like admitting you're terminally ill. The age, gender, or socio-economic status but mostly I want you to leave of the well-intentioned inquirer doesn't matter. It doesn't even matter if they listen to Canada Reads every fall without fail. because I want you Friendly initial questioning (“So are you in school? Oh, good for you. Where do you go? And what do you study?”) drops into a this feels the same as before silence bloated with embarrassment. A blend of pity, discomfort, and a distinct, swelling vibe of not-knowing-what-to-say fills the room. The questioner then proceeds to busy herself with a flaccid newspaper, or carefully stacks different body. same story. forks in a drawer, or makes a clumsy transition to comment on the weather, which is at least diverse in Nova Scotia. if you asked me. I would say yes. I wonder how difficult it could possibly be to stick to the more neutral questions they please just leave would've asked if I were studying business or biology (“What year are you in? Do you like it? What are you planning to do after you graduate?”). If they were feeling especially generous, me. Fathom they might even ask about my favourite author. But they never do, and it's starting to make —Betty Brown Vol 28—Spring 2011 me think the problem isn't that people don't know what to say. Maybe the arts just make Call for Fiction & people uncomfortable. So when I'm in the mood to exploit their reactions, I'll use my most casual voice to let them in on the complete, horrifying truth of my academic life. Untitled Poetry Submissions "Well," I'll say, "I'm doing combined honours in English and Creative Writing," and what Email submissions to is truly bewildering to them is that there's an honours program for something as silly and time and space [email protected] slippery as writing. Then it's as if I've returned from the doctor's office with the prognosis is bubble gum Submission Deadline: of a month to live. Four years at the most, and then I'll be, for all economically cooperative it’s the when, the where Wednesday January 19th, 2011 purposes, handicapped. It seems there's no easy cure for a liberal arts degree. Any hope of you've had your fun rehabilitation exists after an extended period of convalescence in an alternate department. Until it’s the place your coming from Fiction Submissions: healed I won't be able to use anything I've learned. I won't be able to contribute to society. I won’t be the memories of when you were young Max 1000 words able to function productively in the world. It saddens me that something which has enabled me as a it's the life, the love Poetry Submissions: woman and human being is so often seen as just the opposite: utterly disabling. In reality, it has made the world we share Up to 3 poems me more critical, skeptical, open-minded, innovative, engaged, dynamic, and, dare I say it, intelligent. the miss, the wish per submission, If English is truly my illness, I hope it never goes into remission. we've all been there up to 2 pages it's the beat of your chest the times in life By and for the Students, you just can't forget since 1981. —Nathan Banton What resolution will you break first? by Jonathan Rotsztain and Abram Gutscher Two girls walking through Howe Hall lounge: Girl 1: “You think that maybe they’ll find my hamster?” Girl 2: “...” “Going to the gym.” “Going to the gym.” “Eat better.” “Going to the gym and eating better.” Zac Brown Danah Shuli Veronique Kenny In King's 2nd year biology 3rd year sciences 3rd year history Jessica Hutinson Quad: 2nd year kinesiology Girl: “Canvegans swallow?” Walking down University Avenue: Girl: “I told him, ‘Well at least I have my pee.’”

SUBMIT THE RESULTS OF “Better grades” “To not finish papers hours before “Doing my readings.” “Trying not to fuck a MILF” YOUR EAVESDROPPING: they're due.” Sagar Jha OVERHEARD AT DAL Mathias Voegele Amy Bedell FACEBOOK GROUP 3rd year political science Emilie Hurst 3rd year biologo 3nd year arts 3rd year musc

@dalgazette @gazetteopinions @gazette_arts 12 January 7 - January 13, 2011 • arts&culture

arts&culture arts covers cultural happenings in Halifax. E-mail Rebecca or Erica at [email protected] to contribute. arts&culture. Rebecca Spence Arts Editor Fashionistas strike a pose Mick Côté Staff Contributor

Fashion design students at Nova Scotia College of Arts and Design University (NSCAD) sent their hard work down a runway on Dec. 16. The 13 designers worked on individual clothing collections as part of their “intermediate fashion studies” class. From ready-to-wear to more eccentric garments, the young fashionistas wowed the few hundred people in attendance. Liz Doré, a fourth-year student and designer, impressed the crowd with Écru, her three-piece collection. “It’s a small line of three outfits based on a neutral palette, simple and elegant lines designed for young women,” said Doré. Her three dresses flowed down the runway, which was set up at NSCAD’s port campus. It doesn’t end there for designers en devenir, they will be expected to produce a second line for their upcoming design class. Doré has been sourcing some inspiration for her new designs. She will be incorporating her passion for interior design to her fashion. “I'm going to be sourcing my ideas from colour palettes that work in an interior environment, and textiles typically found in home furnishings and use those elements in a subtle way.” The new collections will be presented in April at the Wearable Art Show. • • • Photos by Mick Côté • January 7 - January 13, 2011 13 arts&culture And the nominees are… Which movie will take home the Golden Globe’s top prize next Sunday? Meriha Beaton lulls, and ended at exactly the right time. though he is great at them, they aren’t loyalty and blurring the line between struggle with a stammer is absolutely Rebecca Spence Despite the fact that it was a bit enough anymore. business and family as it is about boxing. flawless. If Firth isn’t awarded the Best Staff Contributors nauseating, Darren Aronofsky’s choice The Hollywood Foreign Press seems Melissa Leo is chilling as Micky and Actor award, I’ll be speechless. to use a hand held camera to film the to agree, as he is excluded from the Best Dicky’s mother. Amy Adams shows —RS The Social Network majority of the movie was smart as it Actor category. The other performances off her Boston accent and tough-girl If director David Fincher held out a few created a vicarious experience for the by Ellen Page and Marion Cotillard were attitude as Micky’s girlfriend. Honourable Mention: more years to make this movie, it could viewer. The viewer became crazy with strong but less memorable, because With all four leading actors garnering 127 Hours have been much better. The idea was Nina (Natalie Portman). the film was more concept-based than Golden Globe nominations, The Fighter Even though 127 Hours wasn’t nom- good in theory, but didn’t quite pan out Portman deserves the acknowledge- character based. None of the actors seems to be the film with the strongest inated for Best Picture, its star James on the big screen. ment she has received. There was received a Golden Globe nod. cast. But even though the script and Franco still managed to grab a nod for Mark Zuckerburg’s life thus far has minimal dialogue and Portman was The concept and visual effects of the direction are phenomenal, it still may Best Actor, which will hopefully draw been extraordinary, but he is only 29 alone in many of the scenes, yet she was film are why it deserves a Best Picture not be enough to make sure that The more attention to this amazing film. and there is more for him to experience. able to uphold the suspense and drama nomination but there was too much Fighter takes home the evening’s top Director Danny Boyle takes on the The development of Facebook, his of the film through her facial expressions action and flashiness for it to be taken prize. true story of Aron Ralston, who was stuck legal battles and personal disputes were alone. The movie is probably too indie seriously enough to win the category. —RS “between a rock and a hard place” interesting, but don’t necessarily need a to win Best Picture, but Portman’s —MB for five days until he freed himself by feature length film just yet. performance could have her The King’s Speech cutting off his right arm. Boyle turns this Jesse Eisenberg was the most walking home with a little golden The Fighter This movie is about as close to perfection terrifying event into a tale of survival and impressive part of the movie. He statue. Unless you’re a boxing fan, you as it gets. It tells the story of King George a testament to the power of the human developed an engaging character —MB might be a bit hesitant to pay for VI (formerly the Duke of York) and his spirit. of a man who is known for what he a ticket to see The Fighter. But this rise to the throne just before the starts of Franco is the only actor onscreen for has done, but not necessarily for who Inception movie goes much further beyond World War II. the vast majority of the 94-minute film (a he is. Eisenberg was powerful while Leonardo DiCaprio is the best the four corners of the boxing ring. More specifically, though, the historical bit shorter than the title suggests), and being subtle with his performance. His actor of his generation. This we Based on a true story, Mark drama showcases the relationship he commands his character’s agony performance, along with the dialogue already know. He has proven to Wahlberg plays Micky Ward, an between King George (Colin Firth) with grace and honesty. For those of made the movie shine when in reality it the world that he is more than just up-and-coming boxer living in the and his speech therapist, Lionel Logue you who can’t deal with blood and gore, was a film about an average guy whose a pretty face and has what it takes small, working-class town of Lowell, (Geoffrey Rush). The subject of this film try your best to make it through the life is just getting started. to be an excellent dramatic actor. Massachusetts. Micky looks up to may seem like a nitty gritty, unimportant climactic action. You’ll likely find yourself —MB But now it’s time to mix things up his half-brother, Dicky (Christian detail, but the impeccable storytelling cheering Franco on in his desperate a little. Bale), a washed-up boxer and crack prevails as it zeros in on this personal measures, and the scene will leave you The Black Swan He will never win the Oscar addict who is still referred to as battle within a much wider context that feeling inspired and uplifted rather than Dark and twisted, this movie did not he deserves if he continues to “The Pride of Lowell.” examines what it takes to be a great horrified and disgusted. I’ll bet my right hold back. The concept was original and play these serious and pensive The film is as much about leader. arm on that. well executed. It was fast paced with no characters, because even working-class values, sibling Firth’s portrayal of the King’s lifelong —RS How the norovirus stole Christmas 2011 DALHOUSIE UNIVERSITY It turns out there’s one way to keep off pounds over the holidays GOVERNORS' AWARDS Jordana Levine Once we realized that the holidays CALL FOR NOMINATIONS Food Columnist could no longer be centred around our usual face-stuffing, my family and I In 1992, to mark the 125th anniversary of the founding of the Dalhousie Student Winter break is the best time to eat. started to look for support and healing The holidays mean a constant flow in food—basically getting the most Union, and to recognize students' contribution to the quality and vitality of the of delicious foods. Latkes, baked nutrients while only having to stomach a University, the Board of Governors established a set of awards to be known as salmon, grilled veggies and my dad’s very small amount of actual food. Governors' Awards. soups, which he lavishly flavours with We went for the basics first. Toast smoky ancho chili peppers and porcini with jam, peppermint and ginger tea Up to four awards can be made each year, for exceptional contributions or leadership mushrooms, are just some of the dishes (both fight nausea), and sugary drinks. I that appear on my family’s dinner table. introduced my mom to Vitamin Water, in the extracurricular realm in such areas as university governance, development of Better yet, I always spend a few days which, despite the nearly three-dollar a sense of community on campus, community service, internationalizing the campus, price tag, helped a lot. Meanwhile, the with my dad’s side of the family from visual or performing arts, minority access or athletics. To be eligible, students must Boston and New York, from whom my mere smell of Gatorade generally makes food-loving roots originate. Although me want to hurl all over again, although have a minimum cumulative GPA of 3.0 or equivalent. Otherwise, all students— my grandpa, the original gourmand, is most of my family members were happy undergraduate, graduate or professional faculty student, full or part-time, at any not alive anymore, we slave over family with it. dinners attempting (and sometimes My mom and brother moved onto stage in their academic career—may be considered for an award. succeeding) to do justice to the chicken noodle soup and applesauce frosty strawberry daiquiris and beefy and, eventually, the Mexican tortilla Recipients are chosen by a committee consisting of the President, three members stews he used to make. And we add casserole that was sitting in my fridge, of the Board of Governors and the Vice-President, Student Services. Nominations our own flourishes, too—my crispy nearly untouched, except for by my dad are invited, but the committee may consider other persons as well. Awards, in the gooey nachos, my uncle’s strawberry who mysteriously (and somewhat guiltily) margaritas, and my aunt’s curried soup missed out on the whole epidemic. form of a plaque, are presented annually in the spring by the Chair of the Board or with cornbread showed up this year. While I couldn’t go near the casserole, designate. Unfortunately, my family’s food-filled I happily chowed down on a falafel pita celebration of the holidays was cut short the day after I got sick, not at all fazed Nominations should include a written description of the student nominee's this year. If it were any other year our by the sharp taste of the pickled beets jeans would have been bursting at the and merely enjoying the protein-filled contribution to the University and up to three letters of support. To assist you in seams, but instead my family arrived crunchy balls of chickpeas and smooth planning your submission, a nomination form can be found on the Student Services home from Boston shaky, exhausted hummus. Still, even though my taste website, studentservices.dal.ca. and with five pounds less on our bodies buds wanted something delicious, my than when we arrived. stomach had negative space in it and Please submit nominations to: I began to feel queasy first, alternately begged me not to eat again for the rest curling into a ball on the couch and of the day. The O ce of the Vice-President rushing to the bathroom to heave out It took me until New Year’s Eve to fully Student Services as much of my formerly delicious dinner prepare myself for the delicious meal I as possible. The rest of the family began went out for with my friends, and I was Room 325A to—literally—drop like flies over the next starving by the time I got there, five days Henry Hicks Academic Administration Building couple days, some lying in bed for nearly after I got sick. Dalhousie University two days straight. It was definitely not the conventional Eight of my ten family members way to stave off the usual holiday weight, 6299 South Street managed to catch norovirus, a highly but it did the trick. Not that I’ll be trying Halifax, Nova Scotia B3H 4H6 contagious stomach bug that put our it again. For me, holiday season—or any appetites out of commission. season for that matter—should always The deadline for nominations is Friday, January 21, 2011. be a time for feasting. 14 January 7 - January 13, 2011 • arts&culture tunes. Yeasayer—Live Bringing Jersey Shore’s at Ancienne Belgique drama up north Lauren Fielding These eight twenty-somethings were racist and all we want to do is be loud,” Erica Eades seem to melt into one another. The Sputnik chosen from thousands of applicants, a viewer known as Persia says. Assistant Arts Editor Yeah, there were times when I wanted Wilfrid Laurier University an attempt to show how much of a What is shown on Lake Shore is simply to fast forward past the excessive melting pot Canada has become. a chewed-up and spat-out copy of Grade: A applause (i.e. the full two minutes of BRANTFORD, Ont. (CUP) — Did you These characters ravage the downtown The Jersey Shore, minus the fake tans The guys from Brooklyn-based cheering that followed their performance think that reality TV couldn’t get any Toronto area in search of sexy, fun times, and clever witticisms like “GTL” and experimental rock group, Yeasayer, of “Ambling Alp”), but really, that's trashier than MTV’s The Jersey Shore? and spend almost as much time bitching “grenades” that have made the show treated fans to an extra special gift this what live albums are all about: from the Well, think again. each other out and causing drama as many a young adult’s guilty pleasure. Christmas, with the release of a live comfort of your own home, you can Our favourite guidos and guidettes they do downing tequila shots and These characters are ignorant, and hooking up. seem to only care about being sexy, album, Live at Ancienne Belgique. experience that unmatched feeling of have some stiff competition to face as Recorded in Brussels on Oct. 28, the going to a show. Canada shows off their own brand of So why the emphasis on the race of getting laid and getting drunk. What set combines songs from the group's In the spirit of the holidays, Live at party animals in Lake Shore, trying to the characters, you may ask? It seems kind of example does this give to the that the producers of really people watching this show? Sure, not all 2007 debut studio album, All Hour Ancienne Belgique is available on the prove that “there’s more to growing Lake Shore want you to see just how much Toronto of us are gullible enough to believe what Cymbals, and the 2010 follow-up, Odd band's website on a pay-what-you-can up in Canada than hockey and maple has become a central hub for cultural is happening in front of us, but there are Blood. basis. The guys modestly give the option syrup.” I'll admit, it took me awhile to get to get it for free, but you can show your The show is based out of Toronto, differences, and how what used to still those who use these characters as into Yeasayer—it wasn't until they support by paying anything from $0.99- and follows a group of eight people be minorities now make up the main examples of what they wish they could released their remix of Florence and the $9.99. from eight different cultures as they population of the area. More than half be, the kind of lifestyle they want. Lake Machine's “The Dog Days Are Over” Yeasayer's previous albums will explore Toronto’s club life, pushing of Toronto’s population are those who Shore is pushing the boundaries as far that they really caught my attention. But definitely be at the top of my shopping the boundaries and generally being are not native of Canada, while another as it possibly can because those who this album made me fall in love. Their list in 2011. Anyone who sounds this dramatic in front of a camera and an 22 per cent are second-generation produce it know exactly what they are mix of psychedelic pop, with playful good live must kick some serious ass in audience of voyeurs, hungry for drama. immigrants with at least one parent born up against; pointless ignorance and self- sounds and aggressive vocals blends the studio. But those concerned for the fate of outside of Canada. obsession. seamlessly, just as each of the songs Canadian television need not worry just There have been claims from viewers In order to one-up The Jersey Shore, yet. While the cast is secured, the show that Lake Shore is using racism to they need to spin their show a little is still in negotiations with television capitalize on ratings, and one particular differently, bring something new to the networks and has yet to land a deal. viewer stated that Lake Shore has table, something that will make people So far, all the hype has been through a “tarnished the reputation of Canadians.” watch and give them ratings no matter Listings webseries posted online. According “Do you understand that in popular the cost. It’s too bad they had to use the to the website, the series is said to be culture, Lake Shore has literally taken a race card in order to make that happen. filmed in spring 2011 in a yet to be shit on Canada? At least we look decent One thing’s for sure—Lake Shore Live Music Visual Art secured house on Lake Shore Boulevard compared to the rest of the world, we may become many a voyeur’s guiltier in downtown Toronto. were known to be such a Liberal people, pleasure. Bluegrass Matinee: The Last Frontier – an exhibit but now we’re seen as anti-Semitic, Shadow River that examines tensions between When: Saturday, Jan. 8 nature, culture and technology Where: Bearly's House of Blues & Ribs When: Through April 26, 6:30 p.m. (1269 Barrington St). Where: Art Gallery of Nova Scotia (1723 Hollis St). Thane Dunn & The Cadillac Kings: The 2nd Annual Elvis Rush Hour, Peaces of Me— Birthday Celebration Installations of Youth Art When: Sat., Jan. 8, 7:30pm When: Through Jan. 28 Where: Rebecca Cohn Theatre Where: Megan Leslie's Community Office Blues Jam with Brad Conrad (1-2207 Gottingen St.) When: Sunday, Jan. 9 Where: Bearly's House of Blues & Ribs ART.surround (1269 Barrington St.) When: Through Jan. 29 Where: FRED. beauty food art. JFK of Mstrkrft and Whet Cafe When: Sunday, Jan. 9, 11 p.m. (2606 Agricola St.) Where: Paragon Theatre (2037 Gottingen St.) Theatre

Rawlins Cross The Wizard of Oz When: Thursday, Jan. 13, 8 p.m. When: Through Jan. 9, 7:30 p.m. and Where: Rebecca Cohn Theatre Saturdays, Sundays, 2 p.m. Where: Neptune Studio Theatre (1593 Argyle St).

Looking to reach students in Halifax? Advertise in the Gazette

Contact Ben McDade [email protected] 902.222.1160 • January 7 - January 13, 2011 15 sports

sports sports covers athletic events and topics relevant to Dalhousie and the Atlantic region. E-mail Dylan at [email protected] to contribute. sports. Dylan Matthias Sports Editor Volleyball team suspended after hazing party Student’s death ruled accidental fall, alcohol involved day that Andrew Bartlett died in the early Cochrane. “First-year players were events where individuals are identified work on enhancing its student code of hours of Oct. 24 after an accidental fall identified and treated a little differently and treated in an unreasonable conduct, he said. in his apartment building’s stairwell. than the veteran players on the team. and inappropriate manner are not “Our review of the policy is not just Police confirmed alcohol consumption As a result, that fits the definition of what acceptable.” going to talk about athletics: it’s going to was a contributing factor, but ruled out hazing would be, and that’s a concern The team will not face any academic talk about a student code of conduct,” hazing as a cause. to us.” penalties, but members will be required he said. “Everybody knows we have Police spokesman Const. Rick expectations of our students, but Mooney said out of respect for the sometimes we haven’t made it as clear.” family the department isn’t releasing any “It may be impossible to predict the Cochrane said he will form a details of the circumstances surrounding president’s advisory committee to look Bartlett’s death. future, but I can say with certainty at behaviour in academics, athletics, St. Thomas University president Dennis “There was nothing suspicious residence and student life on campus. Cochrane announces the suspension of regarding the death and no criminal that Andrew had a bright future He expects the review to be completed the men’s volleyball team. activity was involved,” said Mooney. by the end of the year. • • • Photo by Tom Bateman/The Aquinian Police refused to confirm what aheadPrintFreeSudokuPuzzles.com of him.” The university’s dean of students and Lily Boisson & Tara Chislett Bartlett’s blood-alcohol level was at the Puzzle Set #E3688 Level: Easy athletics director conducted the initial The Aquinian time of death, or any other details of investigation. St. Thomas University what happened to him that night, saying “In no way does this indicate that the to attend a session on responsible Bartlett was an English major planning an autopsy report and a toxicology volleyball team players are responsible drinking and organize clinics for high to graduate in May. It was his first year report are still being completed. for Andrew Bartlett's death,” Cochrane school students. A letter will be put in playing for the varsity volleyball team. FREDERICTON (CUP) — The St. However, university president Dennis said at a second press conference on each player's academic and athletic file Derek Montague, a friend who spoke Thomas University men’s volleyball team Cochrane revealed at a press conference Dec. 9 where he announced the team’s until these7 conditions have been met. at the funeral, said Bartlett was a loyal has been suspended for the remainder on Dec. 8 that Bartlett was involved in suspension. “That was an unfortunate “This is not meant to be a permanent friend and a responsible drinker. of the season following a university hazing the night he died. circumstance, but our action is blight on their reputation. It’s meant to “It may be impossible to predict the investigation into a hazing incident on “There was an event that took place predicated on the fact that we have very be a ramification 4 of their behaviour17 which future,69 but I can say with certainty that campus that preceded the death of a on campus and off campus that would clear policies. Hazing is not acceptable was unacceptable,” said Cochrane. Andrew had a bright future ahead of fourth-year student. meet the definition of hazing,” said … rookie parties are not acceptable and The next step for the university is to him,” he said. Fredericton police confirmed Wednes- 8 9 3 McGill football player 8 2 3 suspended for doping Harnden4 9 a Tiger 1 6 5 Recruit has credentials Redmen linebacker Darcy Pelosse Arfa Ayub He played in 11 career5 playoff games with the Monarchs on Nov. 4. hit with two-year ban Staff Contributor with the Petes and collected five points Harnden will be joining two former and six penalty minutes during the Petes teammates: Patrick Daley and Nick Frost but instead reiterated their general The Dalhousie Tigers men’s hockey playoffs in Peterborough. 6 Brett Theberge, 7 on the Tigers roster1 and CUP Sports Bureau Chief stance on doping violations among their team have added Zach Harnden to the On Oct. 8, 2010 Harnden signed a has enrolled in Dalhousie’s commerce own athletes. line-up. The 6-foot right-winger from professional tryout agreement with the program. EDMONTON (CUP) — McGill University “McGill University’s anti-doping policy Thunder Bay, Ontario joins the team Monarchs and inked a one-year contract1 82 3 linebacker Darcy Pelosse has been clearly states that we are unequivocally mid-season and is expected to make a suspended for two years after testing opposed to any use by student major contribution. positive for clomiphene and tamoxifen, athletes of any banned substance “Zach Harnden is a blue chip player 2 6 3 or performance-enhancing drugs or the Canadian Centre for Ethics in Sports who will have a significant impact on A announced on Dec. 2. practices in contravention of the rules of our team,” said Tigers head coach Pete the Canadian Centre for Ethics in Sports Belliveau via e-mail. and of the World Anti-Doping Agency,” Harnden joins the Tigers from the AHL “Both drugs athletics executive director Drew Love Manchester Monarchs. In six games with sudoku. said in the release. the Monarchs, Harnden had one goal 8 7 4 5 work to reduce The two substances that Pelosse was and two penalty minutes. found to have been using are each estrogen levels.” considered prohibited substances by 3 2 1 7 the WADA. Both drugs operate in “ Harnden is a similar capacities, in that they work to According to a release from the reduce estrogen levels, thus allowing blue chip player.” 7 498 CCES, Pelosse has acknowledged the testosterone to replenish itself in the anti-doping terms that he violated and body. will accept his suspension, forgoing any CIS chief executive officer Marg During 2009-2010 Harnden had his further hearings on the matter. McGregor made it clear, upon the best season playing for the Kingston 6 741 These results stem from the final announcement of Pelosse’s suspension, Frontenacs scoring 24 goals and 36 remaining case that was being reviewed that they continue to work diligently assists for a total of 60 points and 75 8 76 2 by CCES involving CIS football, following with some of the sporting body’s other penalty minutes. drug tests that commenced in June and partners to eradicate as much doping in “I am really excited to live in Halifax. were conducted on 267 players for the the university ranks as possible. I visited Dalhousie last June and loved 9 7 5 3 2010 season. “CIS continues to make it a priority to the city and university campus,” said The terms of Pelosse’s suspension address the issue of doping. CIS hosted Harnden in a press release. “I have only render him ineligible from participating an Anti-Doping Symposium for Football heard great things and look forward to 6 3 9 with any signatories to the Canadian Coaches on Nov. 26,” McGregor joining the team.” Anti-Doping Program, including all wrote in the CCES statement. “We Harnden played in the Ontario Canadian Interuniversity Sport teams, as will continue to work with our partners Hockey League for the Peterborough 8 3 5962 well as training with his McGill Redmen including the CCES, the CFL, and Sport Petes during four seasons from 2005 to teammates. Canada to enhance our testing and anti- 2009. Harnden recorded 105 points and McGill's athletics department didn’t doping education programs.” 104 penalty minutes in 248 career games 1 4 3 speak specifically to the Pelosse matter, with the Petes. B

Instructions, Tips, Answers, Reprints & More Sudoku Puzzles Online! 16 January 7 - January 13, 2011 • sports Sports travels in England: e London derby AUS Henry Whitfi eld Staff Contributor hockey Living in Canada, there have been few opportunities to attend Premier takes on League football matches over the last few seasons, but when the opportunity came up over this holiday break, I central leapt at the chance to see my favourite athletes compete. I was lucky enough to be surprised Canada with tickets to a London derby no less, a battle between defending champions Wins from Chelsea and Arsenal FC at the beautiful Emirates stadium. Acadia, St. FX, To understand the importance of a London derby one need only imagine UNB headline the intense hockey rivalry between Canada and Russia in the 1972 summit Christmas series, only add another forty thousand fans in the stands and title implications. exhibition play Match day arrived and as I woke Dylan Matthias up, the nerves hit in full force. Chelsea Sports Editor are on a terrible run of form while their London counterparts have been playing The Acadia Axemen put six past fantastically and have a fully fit team, University of Toronto third-string with talismanic captain Cesc Fabregas goaltender Russ Brownell and back-up leading the way. Garrett Sheehan on Dec. 29, winning My father, brother and I set off across 6–1 in Christmas break exhibition play in London and after an hour's drive the Wolfville. outline of Emirates stadium comes into Toronto sit seventh in the OUA East view, a magnificent facility that lights An outside view of the Emirates stadium at night.. • • • Photo by Henry Witfi eld heading into the second half of the up the surrounding area. We make our season. Acadia have struggled a bit this way up Drayton Park road and cross the immediately. The unlucky recipient of midfield continued to lack cohesiveness. ecstasy followed by fear, realizing I was year, and sit fifth in the AUS, behind St. North Bank Bridge, greeted by a giant such harsh treatment was villain Ashley Frank Lampard, fresh off a four-month surrounded by hundreds of fans who FX and UPEI. portrait of former Arsenal stars. Cole. The former Gunner jumped ship absence, was off the pace and the speed were suddenly staring intently at me. Rookie forward Adam McIllwraith We're there a full two hours before kick- to their cross-town rivals in the summer of Jack Wilshire and Samir Nasri pushed It was Samir Nasri who saved the day scored twice in a game that highlighted off, passing through security and down of 2006 and the passionate fans allow a dangerous counter-attack forward. for me, coming close to adding another a number of young players. Jay Fehr, hallways adorned with memorabilia and Cole no time to concentrate. Then in a flurry of movement, Arsenal Arsenal goal and the fans were back to Michael Ward, Nathan Green and awards from years gone by. Murals of Arsenal controlled early on, with their broke on the counter after a Michael celebrating and cheering on their team, Spencer Jezegou also scored for Acadia. players display the rich, proud history of up-tempo game conducted by skipper Essien giveaway and Walcott set up who by now were in full control. David Mooney scored for Toronto. the Gunners and their successes. Fabregas. The team focused their plays captain Fabregas in the box to double While the game played out, it was an U of T redeemed themselves Walking up to our seats, the stadium to the wings where England international the lead and set off another round of amazing experience to sit back and listen somewhat on Dec. 30, beating Saint is empty as fans have yet to arrive. Theo Walcott probed wishfully against cheers. But before the Arsenal fans to the fans in full song. Sixty thousand, Mary's in a shootout in Truro. When empty, the stadium displays the Chelsea defence. are done celebrating, it was Walcott almost all singing the praises of their St. FX upset McGill, the third-best CIS- its impressive size, a sixty-thousand Chelsea were unable to get control who blew the game sky high with the heroes on that day. Cheers of “Cesc” ranked team in the country, in the Keating seat state-of-the-art facility adorned of the game, and despite a few half- third goal on another blitz forward. rang out, the passionate adoration of Cup, hosted annually in Antigonish. in Arsenal red. The Highbury is clock chances by Didier Drogba it was Arsenal The fans were on cloud nine, feverishly their Spanish maestro lifting high into the McGill rallied from a 4–1 deficit to win proudly displayed above the Clock End. who continued to control the play and celebrating a three-goal lead and the London sky. 6–5 in overtime. Unsurprisingly, it was It's the fifth largest stadium in the United allow their quick, direct passing to play hopes of more goals to come. As referee Mark Clattenburg brought St. FX leading scorer Bryce Swan who Kingdom. keep away and build up their chances. The Chelsea players are stunned, no the match to a close with his whistle, won it, completing a hat trick in the As the stands filled, the Arsenal faithful With just seconds left in the half, Alex belief left and a lack of intent clear as they the fans stood and showed their process. Both teams played their back- were in full voice, reminding Chelsea of Song bundled in a goal from inside the failed to move forward effectively. But appreciation and we emptied out of the up goaltenders. their lack of history and their recent run of six-yard box and gave his team a well- against the run of play, it was defender stadium into the streets as the Red Army According to reports from the AUS, form. No love lost between the two sets earned lead. The entire stadium erupts Branislav Ivanovic who headed home for continued to sing even as we reached McGill's Jean-Francois Boisvert was of supporters, as the Blues fans returned in cheers. Finally breaking down the Chelsea, pulling a goal back, silencing our car a number of blocks away. taken to hospital in the second period in kind despite their small section of the Chelsea defence allowed the fans to the crowd and giving the fans in blue a To experience my first match at after what is described as a “heavy stands wedged beneath the Clock End. breathe a sigh of relief and finally silence reason to celebrate. Emirates was surreal, to experience it collision.” The match started amid the singing the boisterous visiting supporters. I must admit that as the goal went during a heated London derby and It was a turgid trip for the Redmen, of "Arsenal," but that was soon The second half brought Ramires in I may have been the only fan in soak in the home fans excitement and who lost 7–1 to the CIS number two replaced with a chorus of boos almost onto the field for Chelsea, but the the North End who cheered. It was emotion was beyond words. UNB Varsity Reds on the 30th, as well.

GET INVOLVED, GET ACTIVE AND LIVE WELL @ DAL! Dalhousie University’s Department of Athletics and Recreational Services offers Dal students plenty of opportunities to get active, meet up with friends, show your competitive spirit and take your mind off the books! You can also head to Dalplex with your student ID and unwind while staying healthy.

SATURDAY SUNDAY MONDAY THURSDAY January 8 January 9 January 10 January 13

W/M Basketball vs. W/M Basketball vs. If you’re a full-time Want to earn some Cape Breton, 6/8pm Cape Breton, 2/4pm Dal student you’re cash? likely already a W Hockey vs. UPEI, FREE for Dal students! The Tigers “Shoot Dalplex member! 7pm for Tuition” contest FRIDAY Don’t wait any longer, TUESDAY WEDNESDAY January 7 FREE for Dal students! January 11 January 12 will take place at the First Outdoor Adven- bring your Dal ID to men’s hockey game ture Crew meeting of Dalplex and get vs SMU tomorrow W Hockey vs. MtA, the year! 2:30pm at moving! Zumba’s back! Intramural Registra- night!! 7pm the Rock Court. Email 7:45-8:45pm in the tion Deadline for FREE for Dal students! [email protected] if Dalplex fieldhouse. European Handball you want more info League Intramural Registra- but can’t make the FREE for Dal students! for Floor tion Deadline meeting. Hockey & Badminton Leagues ATHLETICS.DAL.CA • January 7 - January 13, 2011 17 sports SPORT/RETORT Tiger’s Divers: sport's best fiction writers hockey Dylan Matthias of a play. Some dives make us wonder, Sports Editor in more ways than one. Some dives are made explicitly to be seen, to try to fool, mid-season I’ve managed to avoid writing this or to try and draw a foul. Some dives column for a long time, but here I am, pretend outright and some only pretend a semi-amateur soccer reporter who to pretend. wrap-up moonlights as a creative writer—I had to Is it really part of the game? Any sport do it, I'm afraid. must have its villains to work, of course, its Creativity is a cornerstone of any sport, notorious personalities. Diving is part of Gazette’s but on a 120 by 70-yard field, the amount the conversation, a sign, a reflection of its men’s hockey of space means creativity thrives. Some circumstance and an interpretation—a players use it to score great goals, make judgment, really—of it. Fans of the delightful defensive tackles or pull off game—like me and you—get caught some stunning saves. But wherever up in viewing right and wrong and friend instinct, freedom and constraints exist, or foe. Dives—sport's little fictions— fakery can happen. exist somewhere in between. Diving Arfa Ayub Sometimes, it’s advantageous. Some isn’t good and it isn’t bad. It’s something Staff Contributor say it’s part of the game. Sometimes it’s else: pretend. A dive can be good or so obvious as to be comical. Diving in bad—if a team’s thug comes sliding The Dalhousie Tigers men’s hockey any sport, but especially soccer, where through the star striker at ridiculous team ended the year with a 4–0 loss to the sport’s reputation is so entwined with speed and the striker falls out of the way, the St. FX X-Men on Nov. 30. The Tigers it, is always an ethical question. then that dive has contributed to the are in the sixth and final playoff position, game. thanks to a disappointing Moncton The laws state merely that anyone team, heading into the second half. “Is it really part attempting to deceive the referee into To start the season, the Tigers had making a false judgment is guilty of gotten into the bad habit of falling of the game?” unsporting behaviour. So the onus in behind during games. Despite the slow on the ref to make the interpretation starts the team managed to pull out There are lots of dives: there are and ultimately he or she must decide, some victories. the ones the referee doesn’t see, and as objectively as possible, what the The amount of new players joining the their brothers, the ones the referee appropriate reaction is. Is the dive team probably didn’t help the Tigers’ saw but didn’t really feel were trying to deceptive and looking for advantage, start. With eight new recruits suiting fool him. Like any ethical question, it’s or to attack; or is it sending another up for the first time, not only was there about pushing the limits of acceptability. message. Either way, the diver has an a trend of slow starts but the Tigers Soccer’s laws are not written in stone agenda that must be remembered. also got into penalty trouble, taking an (they change every few years whenever A dive is there for interpretation by average of 6.1 per game. a board called IFAB—the International everyone, whatever the decision. A dive Rookie forwards Brad McConnell and Football Association Board, made up is part of the game. Pierre-Alexandre Vandall have provided mostly, but not entirely, of Brits decides The diver—the writer, the actor, the the Tigers with a scoring touch that has to change them) and are written in such painter, anyone who imagines and been lacking in the past several years. a way that there can be a lot of grey area pretends while really creating in order to McConnell, a two way forward, currently open to interpretation. speak—puts it out there for people to leads the team in scoring with nine goals see. It isn’t easy, it takes a certain type of We hockey-bred Canadians tend to and has played well defensively, too. Dal look poised to make the playoffs for the first time in six years. condemn anyone who “goes down person, and, especially in sports, it’s risky. “Just working hard in practice and • • • Photo by Abram Gutscher easy,” but there's a difference between The dive isn’t always meant for the good learning things from the older guys,” going down easy for no reason and of the game just as the fiction isn't always said McConnell when asked how he has the Tigers in games when most needed. rivals Saint Mary’s. Again, the Tigers had falling down after being fouled. Dives meant for the good of the world. It’s a been able to have a successful season Disher starting was a bit unexpected: fallen behind early in the first period, can have a message—they can scream reaction or a prediction, a message, and thus far. Bobby Nadeau had been the main but again they managed to score in for attention to a hidden foul, or they a story. starter last year, and is probably the regulation and come away with another can question a referee's interpretation I, for one, prefer sports with stories. Tiger’s goalie of the future. 2–1 overtime victory. The newest addition to the team, six- The third victory was over UPEI, a “ e Tigers foot forward Zach Harnden, is a gritty team who have gone from playoff right-winger who brings size and depth bubble to within two points of UNB in played their best to Dalhousie. a snap this fall. The Tigers took the lead The Tigers played their best hockey again and again only to give it up. The hockey during during the month of November, winning Tigers stuck with their ‘never give up’ 6 games out of the ten played and went mentality that had been present during the month of on a four game win streak against the the past two games and scored for the top-rated teams in the country. It was win in overtime. November, some of the Tigers’ best hockey in years. The win against defending national Nadeau made his return in that stretch champions UNB was by far the most winning 6 games and looked like he’d never left. impressive one. The Tigers had faced Nadeau says that he didn’t change UNB on the road in October and out of the ten anything in order to get himself back into suffered an embarrassing 5–1 loss. At the team. home, the Tigers came away with a played and “At the beginning of the season, I solid 6–3 victory. When UNB started had maybe some difficulties but I kept to get frustrated and tried to irritate went on a four working hard in practices and when I had the Tiger players, the Tigers refused to my chance, it turned out good for me,” give in and focused on the task at hand: game win streak he says. playing sound defensively to keep the Three out of the four wins during that lead intact. UNB aren't looking quite as against the top- time were overtime victories. good as they did last year, but they are The first victory came against the still number four in the country heading rated teams in Acadia Axemen, one of the big AUS into January. teams, but one which has really struggled Following the game, Belliveau had the country.” this season. The Tigers took the lead in nothing but praise for his team and even the game early, but fell behind to three went as far as calling the game the best Vandall’s speed and shooting abilities unanswered goals by the Axemen. All effort he had seen in three years. have allowed the Tigers to form a more season long the Tigers defence has In essence, the Tigers have shown aggressive attack system that they disappeared from games and others have shown a little bit of everything: haven’t been able to play in the past. have shown that have the ability to play scoring, defence, guts and the ability The goaltending duo of veteran Josh well in their stead. Despite adversity, to stick to the game plan. The question Disher and Bobby Nadeau gave Tigers the Tigers managed to get back in the remains: can they keep playing consis- head coach Pete Belliveau selection game and squeak out a controversial tently enough to get themselves into the headaches. Belliveau went with Disher, 4–3 overtime win. play-offs? For a team that hasn’t made who had a strong pre-season and kept The second victory was an AUS playoffs in nearly six years, that unexpected one, coming against arch- would be a huge accomplishment. 18 December 3 - December 31, 2010 • comics.

We interrupt Roy.L in the Great Coffee Caper to bring you...

Submit your poetry. [email protected] Happy New Year 2011 from the Dal Gazette! Editor in Chief: January 7, 2011 Shani Blankrot Back to School EWB Cheese for Change a Huge Success CO-OP CORNER Jordan Walker country but who has worked most in which they work in Africa, Things to Remember: VP Finance of EWB Dalhousie of his professional life in Canada. and back home in Canada. The • e Co-op website o ers ho doesn’t enjoy a night Following a break in which guests 'Cheese for Change' event is the many tips and is very infor- of dressing up, sipping were encouraged to browse the se- chapter’s biggest event of the year, Shani Blankrot mation. e website is wineW and engaging in interesting, lection of silent auction items and and is one which the engineering Industrial '11 engandcompscicoop.dal.ca thought provoking conversation? various sale items, Amanda Mac- community, and the Halifax com- o we’re back to school for the • Round 1 is from January 6 to And if it’s for a good cause? Even Donald took the stage. Amanda munity as a whole, await eagerly winter semester, it's 2011, and February 14. better. Engineers Without Borders’ was EWB Dalhousie’s most recent every year. The event is a chance I Sdon’t know about you – but I’m annual Wine and Cheese fundrais- Junior Fellow, who returned from to get out of the offi ce or take a Word of the Week pumped! This semester, I’m the ing event, 'Cheese for Change', a placement in northern Ghana this break from exams and hear new Winter Blues: Winter can be a dif- Editor in Chief of the Sextant. Ben  cult time for some students. It's was exactly that. The event, held summer. She spoke of her experi- perspectives from top speakers Wedge, previous Editor in Chief dark and cold, but don't let that get at the University Club on Studley ence there, from personal stories from the development fi eld. you down. Turn your Winter Blues (currently on coop), started some campus in late November, was of her hyperactive host brother to Don’t think you can wait until next into a case of Winter Booze and great initiatives with the paper a huge success thanks to the vol- the new knowledge of develop- November for the next EWB Dal you'll feel better in no time. last semester (we got a new offi ce, Editors’ note: Word of the Week is a humour column unteers and donors as well as the ment she gained from her hands- event? No worries, we will be hav- based on popular expressions around Sexton Campus. If went Mac, started using Google you have any complaints or suggestions, please email sex- over 75 students, faculty and pro- on development work there. ing two Tunes for Change concert [email protected]. Obviously we prefer suggestions! Analytics, and much more) and fessionals who attended. The night So what exactly was all this fun- fundraisers this semester and we I’ll continue on this route while opened with an address from the draising for? Engineers Without are always at the T-Room selling implementing some ideas of my Dalhousie chapter’s co-presidents, Borders’ Dalhousie Chapter is grilled cheese for just $2 every own. We’re looking for talented Laura Payne and Emily Stewart, fundraising to send not one, but Friday night! Come check us out, students to contribute articles, followed by an engaging and in- two Dalhousie students overseas buy some grilled cheese or even pictures, ideas, and feedback. We formative talk from Dr. Behrang to either Malawi, Zambia, Burkina volunteer with us! More informa- even have some positions avail- Forough, assistant professor of Faso or Ghana for four months tion will follow about our various able. So don’t be shy and email us Adult Education and Commu- during summer 2011. This posi- events in the upcoming semester. Write. ([email protected]). nity Development at the Coady tion, the Junior Fellowship in In- Any information on volunteer Get Paid. Institute at St. FX. Dr. Forough’s ternational Development of which opportunities, or on Engineers P.S. We pay for content. Send articles to [email protected] discussion on participatory devel- Amanda MacDonald spoke, is a Without Borders in general can be opment in the Global South was chance for students to get hands- found at our website: P.P.S. Arch and Planning stu- both entertaining and informative. on development experience, gain www.dal.ewb.ca dents, we really want to hear from It was a unique perspective on de- invaluable leadership skills and you! Read this article in full velopment from a man who was of course, have a huge impact on online at thesextant.ca born and raised in a developing their communities - both the ones Halifax's Best Trivia! Sexton Campus neers, new scandal. Can’t wait to see what 2011 brings. XOXO Gossip Geek. Events Got some dirty laundry you want me to see? Looking for something to do? Send your shameful pics to dalgossipgeek@ Not spending enough time ossip Geek here, your one and only gmail.com mingling with other faculties/ source into the scandalous lives of Sex- Read this column in full disciplines? en check out ton’sG engineers. online at thesextant.ca some of these events. With exams fi nished, my engineers had lots of time over their vacation to create some holly Friday, January 7th jolly scandal. First Trivia of 2011 Family comes in all shapes and sizes. But when yours is made up of all male engineers in There are those that choose to give everything ursday, January 13th ugly Christmas sweaters that match, it may be they have during the holiday season, and there Chemical Society Karaoke at time to fi nd a new one. Spotted: some IEs bond- are those who choose to show everyone what the T room ($3) ing by the Christmas tree. they have during the holiday season. What (or who) will D choose to spend all her cash on? ursday January 20th Dal Action Society Night

Does your society have an event on Sexton Campus? Send an email to [email protected] and we’ll post it here!

Check out the full issue online by scanning this barcode with your smartphone, or by visiting the Photo by Matthew Rankin website! Some content was not Mechanical '13 printed, as we've chosen to focus Spotted: Some Chem Engs dancing with all And just like that, the Christmas lights go out, "This is the train that I hope to drive when I on online content deliv- their friends at their holiday party the needles fall off the once decorated trees, get my engineering degree." ery. If you have any con- and people board planes to fl y to a new job or cerns, please email us. a new semester of school. New year, new engi- n #1 solutio rs re yea t Hamachi! New hy a healt Eat Daily 4:00 pm to 6:30 pm enjoy 50 different beer each under $5 and 10 Tapas each under $10

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Dalhousie University and the University of King’s College Creative Writing Journal For all faculties, genres, and forms Freedom at its best Call for Fiction & Poetry Submissions

Email submissions to [email protected] Submission Deadline: Wednesday January 19th, 2011 Fiction Submissions: Max 1000 words Poetry Submissions: Up to 3 poems per submission, up to 2 pages

By and for the Students, since 1981.