The student newspaper of Imperial College

Issue 1039 FELIX November 3rd 1995 Linstead Scapegoated in Halloween Debacle

BY JONATHAN TROUT The most serious disturbances of the term occurred on Tuesday night, when the activities of Linstead and Southside residents resulted in the Police being called to Prince's Gardens. The com- plaints of local residents have fur- ther resulted in the indefinite closure of the Linstead Bar. The annual Southside Halloween party, held on the building's upper gallery, devel- oped into a lively occasion with a constant, but not especially high, level of noise emanating from the high rise block. This was not a particular problem until a fire alarm in Linstead Hall led to the expulsion of at least 150 students into the Prince's Gardens area. Upon the arrival of Ian from their Warden, the Linstead Prince's Gardens College flat to With some of the newly Caldwell, Director of Estates, residents returned inside, in witness the proceedings, resi- arrived freshers in a fairly inebri- the Linstead residents gave most cases to their rooms. dents have been told officially by ated state, the ritual banter start- grudging acquiescence to his However John Hassard, Warden the Rector that the bar will not ed up between Southside and requests for calm, and returned of Falmouth Keogh Hall, who be available until students Linstead Halls. Following the inside. At this point the incident was not present at the scene, 'behave in a reasonable and retreat of the Linstead Hall resi- should have ended, but for a fur- commented: "it was like a riot, responsible' manner. dents after the all clear, the ther fire alarm in Linstead Hall. and riotous behaviour is deeply With suggestions that Southside residents were then Following this evacuation the regretful." College has been seeking to close required to evacuate their halls police arrived on the now The concern of College the bar for some time, residents when their fire alarms sounded. charged, yet good humoured, authorities over the allegedly speculate whether the popular With students now in fine voice, scene. After a short chat with high level of student alcohol con- social amenity will ever reopen. the exchange continued between Earl Lancaster, the Linstead Hall sumption later manifested itself This, together with the unfair- the grounded Southsiders and Warden, the police departed. with the Rector, Sir Ronald ness of not closing Southside's the Linstead revellers. After some coercive words Oxburgh's instruction, to close more profitable licensed premis- Linstead Hall's bar. Some have es were matters on which nei- Albert Hall Awaits raised questions as to the wisdom ther Sir Ronald or Mr Caldwell Lottery funding of this action. One of the Bar were available to comment. Both Committee members working the ICU President, and Mr Albert Hall spokespeople have that evening told Felix that most Lancaster were said to be "bewil- dismissed suggestions in national of the student drinking took dered" by the decision. Sarah papers that they have already place not in the Linstead bar but White said: "This seems like a received £40m in Lottery fund- in the Southside Disco. violent, knee-jerk reaction from ing Page 3 With the Director of Estates someone not in possession of all being close at hand in his 47 the facts." TWO . FELIX FRIDAY NoveMBER 3RD 1995 NEWS News in brief

'Beit Option' Motor Show Protest Considered Traffic around Earl's Court was An initial sounding of the 'Beit disrupted twice over the week- Option' has been the concern of end as people demonstrated out- Imperial College's Estates side the London Motor Show. Division this week, as Ian Frame, Security guards and Police were Director of Planning, went on a called in to restrain protesters as walkabout with Union staff. The they tried to clamber over the party looked at the various parts barriers surrounding the building. of the Union building that would Last Friday evening saw be moved or altered if the pro- 'Critical Mass', a cyclist pressure posal is taken up by the College. group, arriving at the Show for a Sarah White said that the rally after their monthly meet College has been "fiddling under Waterloo bridge. The around with the idea", and will group of about a thousand be doing some rough costing over cyclists proceeded slowly to the the next few weeks. She added Brompton Road entrance of the that most of the work has been show. There they were confront- done already as the Biology part ed by locked gates and irate secu- Photo: William Lorenz of Beit had been dissected in the rity guards. Along the route of Unfinished: Installation of smoke detectors has taken over a year original plans. However, Ian their ride, the flow of traffic, Frame commented that the idea already fairly stagnant in the rush has not yet gone to the quantity hour, ground to a halt with Fire Alarm Tests Continue surveyors and reiterated that the motorists venting their irritation costs have to balance. by sounding their horns. BY THE NEWS TEAM Officer, said the system had One driver tried to force Residents of Southside Halls are overlap and that he was satisfied Labour Whip hisway through the crowd of set to be subjected to daily early with the level of protection cur- Stephen Byers, Labour MP for bicycles but was advised by a morning fire alarm tests for rently offered. Wallsend, was a guest of Imperial Police Officer to stay put, much another month. Although the present fire College Union Labour Club on to the delight of the assembled The alarms have been sound- protection is perfectly legal for October 20th. He is seen as one masses. The cyclists were keen to ed at 9am each day since the student residences, it is well of the brightest young stars in the stress the peaceful nature of their unsuccessful fire practice on below the standard required by Parliamentary Labour Party protest, aimed at demonstrating October 17th. Alarms failed to the Fire Precaution Act (1972) becoming party Whip recently. the hypocrisy of motoring in go off on staircases two and four for paying members of the pub- He spoke to a sizeable gath- London. leaving residents unaware of the lic. The sole reason Southside ering on a range of issues includ- One individual expressed a warning to evacuate the building. currently holds hotel status is ing sleaze and arms sales to Iran desire "to spread love and peace" However, Prof G New and Dr J due to a loophole in the law. As it and Iraq, both topical issues sub- throughout the capital by "wav- Hassard, the hall's wardens, said has applied for certification, ject to inquiries by Nolan and ing and smiling at people" as they they were satisfied with the pending a visit from the fire Scott. However, many members passed. turnout of the other staircases. In department, the dubious nature of the audience were surprised Sunday had the 'Reclaim the an open letter to the four halls, of the system is given the benefit that Mr Byers described himself Streets Action Network' out in they said that there were to be no of the doubt. as a socialist while very much force opposite the Warwick Road further fire practices this term, Similar to one in Linstead being a supporter of Tony Blair's entrance to Earl's Court. It was a so alarms should be taken seri- Hall, the system is currently style and policies. much smaller demonstration ously. partly installed and will be One of the more impressive than Friday's but more vocal; The source of the problem is brought on line over the next few of the Labour Club's guests, he chanting slogans and cheering the 15 year old alarm control sys- weeks. It will have the capability very capably fended off questions each bus and booing each car that tem, sections of which have to pinpoint fires down to the from Consoc members especially passed. taken to spontaneous failure. nearest room, report disablement over local government. After one The protesters generated a Due to the disappearance of the or breakdowns and detect question he particularly empha- lot of noise but were mainly inef- installation details necessary for cannabis smoke. Students who sised that Conservative run fectual in disrupting the flow of fault location, the only means of burn their food are still a prob- Westminster Council is the only visitors to the show. At one point tracing failures is trying the sys- lem that hopefully the Fire one in the country which has they tried to bring their own tem and seeing if it works. Faced Department will solve, but the been officially found corrupt, and Chinese Dragon style model with concerns of student safety if new hardware should be in place the council appointed solicitors London Bus on to the road, but the system failed between test- by the end of November until who refute these allegations are were forcibly prevented from ings, Graham Cox, College Fire which time testing will continue. hardly 'independent'. doing so by a ring of Police. NEWS FELIX FRIDAY NOVEMBER 3RD 1995 . THREE Albert Hall Funding Uncertain

Confusion over £40m Lottery Payout renovations

BY AAARK BRIDGE David Elliot, the Deputy Chief Executive of the Royal Albert Hall, has said that there is still no sign of whether their application for £40 million pounds of lottery funding had been successful. This follows recent reports which cast doubt over the suc- cess of the Albert Hall's applica- tion for Lottery funds to renovate the historic Hall's surrounding area. would be via the sliproads either In an interview with Felix side of the main stairway oppo- Media Criticism of Mr Elliot explained that any site the Royal School of Music. money that 'came their way' These roads currently lead to Heritage Commission would be used to expand the underground parking for resi- nine year programme of 'recon- dents. National media have extensively as one for Eritrean Refugees, struction and betterment'. This The extra space generated covered the heritage commission were considered for lottery plan is in trouble as it is being by the changes will become a ser- desicion, but some of the jounal- money. Richard Branson [who currently funded by internal bud- vice yard allowing rigging to be ism seems as biased as the claims bid unsuccessfully against get surpluses. The stated goals of carried under the building and of money mis-distribution itself. Camelot] said that the Lottery the ongoing scheme are to lifted onto the stage. Further The Sunday Times purported was being driven by greed that improve the atmosphere and dressing room space will also be that the Albert Hall will be allo- might lead to the same disrepute enjoyment for patrons, perform- created. cated £40m of lottery funds for as the 'fat cat' bosses of the pri- ers, and promoters alike. Another major alteration will major works on the building, vatised utilities. Part of the plan involves the be the pedestrianisation of the though they quoted the Chief Wednesday's Times and restoration of the building's road that encircles the Albert Executive as saying he had yet to Daily Telegraph explained the ancient ventilation system to its Hall, "to create something like hear of any such decision. This Church of England's view that original design, which optimised Covent Garden, with cars able to appears to be born out by a state- the Lottery "Exploits the vulner- natural convection effects, and go in and out". Over 1,600 of the ment to issued to Hall employees able and undermines the public removed blockages that were Hall's seats are scheduled to be saying "Despite the story in the good". Both then pointed out installed to conform to fire regu- modernised, and permission has Sunday Times ... subsequently that the Church had made appli- lations. also been granted for the side repeated in other newspapers; cations for £19m and had already Permission has also been entrances to be glazed so as to the Hall has received no indica- received Elm. Staying with obtained for the rebuilding of a create more foyer space. tion yet as to whether our appli- Church issues on Thursday, The conservatory on the south side of The refurbishments have an cation has been successful..." Daily Telegraph said the Church the Hall, rehousing restaurants, estimated cost of £5 7m. If the There were also reports of com- of Scotland would not be making cloakrooms, and other amenities £40m application to the Lottery plaints by Midlands MPs that too any applications. The British that were moved into the main fund is accepted, the project is much money had already been Medical Journal reported a 17% body of the building when the scheduled to begin within a year. invested in the South. increase in the number of calls to original was destroyed earlier this The media may have influ- On Monday October 23rd Gamblers Anonymous and century. enced the application's outcome, The Daily Telegraph wrote of blamed the BBC for over-public- Part of the strategy involves as they appear to have induced how big charities had a drop of ity. They claimed that right wing the creation of a level under the political controversy over alloca- 14% in donations. The Tories were pressing Kenneth building extending through to tion of grants to 'highbrow' arts Independent carried a story on Clarke to disregard plans to raise Prince Consort Road. Access how smaller organisations, such taxes on lottery takings. FOUR . FELIX FRIDAY OCTOBER 27TH 1995 NEWS Council Elections Oxfam Cash Stolen will be Re-run in Raid on Rag

One of the shortest Emergency if they so wished. However, it BY THE NEWS TEAM knowledge of the union building Councils on record met on was established at the meeting as the charity collection buckets Tuesday night to consider a that the constitution is ambigu- An estimated £300 of rag were later found in the union motion put forward by the ous on this point, and that many fundraisihg for Oxfam was stolen changing rooms. "I don't under- Executive Committee "that interpretations could have been from the ICU building last stand the mentality of someone Council nullify the elections of made. Wednesday. Rag collectors had who would steal from charity" ordinary members that took Points were raised over the spent Wednesday afternoon in she said. "Freshers have got up at place at its meeting on 10th practicality of running the elec- Embankment station, and had six o'clock in the morning to col- October and that new elections tions again, and the principle of left the profits in the rag office lect, and some bastard's got the should take place." The motion having open elections not exclu- on the west side of Beit Quad proceeds in their pocket... we're was supported by a handout dis- sive to those in the know. Sarah overnight. The proceeds from a very very angry." tributed by those most incensed White said that the motion was collection in aid of Oxfam went John Lambert, currently Rag by the original election's 'uncon- meant to address peoples' feel- missing sometime after 7pm. IC treasurer, is temporarily oversee- stitutionality'. ings over the first elections, and Security discovered that the win- ing the Rag committee in the A bone of contention was that, if passed, the papers for the dow had been removed whilst absence of an elected chair. The whether or not the proposing posts would go up the day after. patrolling later that evening, but previous incumbent, Richard papers for ordinary members The debate continued for twenty the loss of money was only dis- Willis, resigned last month after should have gone up for two minutes before being called to a covered the next morning. being criticised when a first year weeks prior to the elections. This vote by the Council Chair, and Speaking on behalf of the student was found drunk on the would have made all Union the motion was passed by 12 Rag committee, Eleanor Tench walkway after the rag fresher's members aware of the forthcom- votes to 9, there being 31 voting speculated that the perpetrators event. ing elections, so they could stand members present. were IC students with some

GET READY - GET FRESH! Access, Visa, Mastercard, Cash, Cheques NEWS FEATURE FELIX FRIDAY 3RD NOVEMBER 1995 . FIVE u Freddie Starr ate my grant!" Perhaps not, but Nooman Haque The political consensus explains who might soon. regarding the future of higher education is at first sight seam- less, differing only in the choice of buzzwords. All parties propose patronising doctrine that soci- One could also assume that and the (comparatively) efficient passing on some of the cost of ety is in debt to students. he is testing Labour policy services (NUS Legal and NUS higher education to the students 'New Solutions' is an amongst the students and thus Ents) should go their separate - an acknowledgement at last assemblage of 100 student working more for them than ways, allowing subscribing SU's that the tax system cannot unions who are encouraging for those that was elected to to pay according to their specific entirely support a mass higher students to partake in the serve. The issue is a serious one needs education system. debate. The group is lead by and remains to be resolved. Mr I wonder too if the other The Conservative National Ghassan Karrian, President Karrian is paid by ULU student unions involved in 'New' Policy Group on HE, along with of ULU and supported by and should act and Solutions are aware of Mr. Labour and the Lib Dem's would Sarah White, President think in Karrian's left leaning tendency, like to see HE expansion contin- of Imperial. accor- particularly our own Ms. White, ued and sincerely believe that I do not doub dance who has offered her e-mail they can do this without raising the sincerity of this with the address to field enquiries about doubts about quality. movement but I needs of the group. The actual outcome will of do question the J his con- Perhaps Miss White is aware stituents, not course depend on the result of motives of Mr but fears the charismatic Mr those of his the next election, but also on the Karrian. The J Karrian, or perhaps she too has Labour friends. contribution that the student clue which ambitions Westminster way (it is The effects that a more likely however that she movement makes to this discus- gives the politically biased skips happily through the blos- sion. And this is where the prob- game away national student soming meadows of ignorance lems begin. is the adjunctive organisation have been and innocence and to credit her 'New' - the Blair hall- devastating to the stu- Earlier this year the NUS with being so shrewd as Mr. mark to describe rehashed dent movement in the confirmed its anachronistic and Karrian is a generous and purely Tory policies. past. In 1992 the NUS encour- Utopian posture by refusing to hypothetical extension of her The incumbent Baron of aged students to vote Labour in support a call for ruthless reform abilities). Castle Malet will be only too marginal constituencies. This of HE funding. Instead it grasped X Either way, the lack of a pleased to show you around his high profile campaign only on to the ephemeral tenet on > clear statement declaring politi- Kingdom, and in particular encouraged the Conservative which its existence depends - a cal impartiality clouds the impor- show off his treasure trove of government to speed up it's restoration of grants to 1979 lev- tant debate which Mr Karrian prominent Labour front Voluntary Membership Bill - els and reinstatement of benefits. a and Miss White have entrusted benchers. Mr. Karrian (a designed to curb student union themselves to lead. Their desire The NUS finances depend Labour councillor) appears to a power and remove government to encourage student wide on student acceptance of credu- be destined for the Commons funding for student sports, debate is welcome but with the lous platitudes which are and in this respect his actions societies and entertainments. cloud of uncertainty over their wheeled out to every dewy eyed could be interpreted as part of The actions of the NUS nearly motives is rather hard to lift. If and shivering fresher counting his career drive (though stories killed off the SU's that pay a pennies at Christmas. Any help- of students slipping up on the 2 we are to provide input into the H premium for it's rather shoddy debate, Mr. Karrian, we must ful idea has to combat student road from Bloomsbury to service. This greedy cabal of know what and for whom you poverty, explode the myth of Whitehall as a result of his oily Leftists should be dismantled 'free education' and reject the progress are unsubstantiated). stand.

OPTIONS: The major parties' views on higher education funding. Conservative Party Labour Party Liberal Democrats NUS Keep lid on growth of HE and Continued expansion of HE, cre- Continued expansion of HE. Also Reinstatement of housing benefit develop more lower level cours- ating "Seamless robes of learn- favour "learning accounts". and income support. Return to es. Eventual elimination of grant ing", "University for Industry", Maintenance paid for by state 1979 level of student grant and introduction of comprehen- "learning accounts" and "learning and fees paid back after second (approx cost at least 7p on sive loan system to cover mainte- bank" i.e students, state and year. income tax). nance. Radical Tories want employers contribute to a reser- New Solutions vouchers for fees payment. voir of cash. Don't like fees Loan system for maintenance vouchers but favour "learning grants. Employer contributions entitlements". for tuition. The Information Technology Division of Goldman Sachs 'Without invite you to a Presentation on 22 November 1995 at 6.00pm the in room 208, Civil Engineering, best Imperial. people Goldman Sachs enjoys a reputation as one of the world's we leading investment banking and securities firms. Our reputation is built upon high professional and ethical cannot standards, team work, creativity and commitment. We share an enthusiastic dedication to our clients' interests and a desire be to achieve beyond the norm. the Please join us to learn more about challenging career best opportunities in the following areas: firm" M Systems Development ii LAN Technology U Telecommunications

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Web Site E-Mail http:// vvvvw.gs.com [email protected] G3137 REAL LIFE FELIX FRIDAY 3RD NOVEMBER 1995 . SEVEN A close encounter of the swM(s)Il@m hind.

It was a nice, bright you do?" I mumbled cautiously, engineer, though that was what I another few thousand years morning near the end shaking the proferred hand. I sat was now. He told me about eter- would have been a bit tactless, so down, feeling as though I'd nal souls, about reincarnation, I left it at that. of the Easter Holidays crossed some point of no return about my aura and the colours Holidays ended, and exams in April 1995. in etiquette terms. But there was that it was showing, that the fact loomed. Mad weeks of over- Two things crept into my a way out. I'd have my corn- that Buddhists got it right and working, undersleeping, under- mind as I woke up that morning; flakes, exchange a few pleas- everyone else was wrong, man, eating and undershaving ensued. Cornflakes and differential equa- antries, talk about the weather, just wrong. Exams, a bit of Felix hackery, tions. The former because I was gasp in horror at my watch and But that was the scary part. and foreign holidays passed by, hungry and needed some break- say I'd need to do some exam Peter wasn't talking like some and mornings where I'd get up fast, the latter because I couldn't revision, escaping to the compar- washed-up sixties druggie. He thinking of cornflakes but not, do them and needed to know ative freedom of differential was terrifyingly ordinary, a man mercifully, differential equa- how to in order to prevent my equations. Easy... with a family who wouldn't have tions. But for a while afterwards, first year exams from descending He chatted to my parents looked out of place dishing out I couldn't help viewing people into farce. and sister for a while, talking financial advice in Barclay's. He differently. My family, all my Breakfast and mathematics about spirits, etheric bodies, spoke with a conviction borne of friends, everybody it seemed, had been uppermost in my mind astral projection and the like, experience, a man who claimed had been roaming the planet for for at least the last few mornings, while I crunched through my that he'd had the ability to read millenia, jumping from life to but something else was to hap- cornflakes. I listened, geniunely aurae - a person's spiritual bar- life, person to person, country to pen that same day which was to interested. And then I was sur- code, of you like - since the age country, inhabiting one mass of change my life for the next fifty, prised at being interested. This of nine. Either that, or he was organic machinery for a few well, twenty, no,say ten, well, wasn't right. It wasn't what any lying. fleeting decades before moving onto another, and having no rec- alright, three, days. But the odd self-respecting engineering pupil I felt good. I'd found out ollection of the previous one. thing wasn't so much that I felt would be seen dead doing, talk- something interesting about my life had changed, but the fact ing to a spiritualist, if that's what myself and about life. But then I I had conversations with a that it should have been affected he was. But the real shock had felt bad about feeling good. I longtime friend of my parents, at all. Or this life, at any rate... yet to come. wasn't meant to be interested. I who really did dish out financial "This is Peter," my .mother Apparently completely off was a man of engineering, a stu- advice in Barclay's, talking about said, gesturing to the large, mid- the cuff, he asked, "We've met dent of the sciences, and pro- the Theosophical Society, about dle-aged genial man who was at before, haven't we?" found sceptic of all things non- Blavatski, and even Albert our breakfast table talking to my "Erm, have we?" it was cer- scientific. Where were his equa- Einstein, and Richard Feynman. father. By this time, I'd decided tainly news to me if we had. tions, his graphs, his tables, his Men who were not merely that cornflakes were a far higher "We were both priests in a references to papers in Nature accepted by the establishment priority than differential equa- temple. This wasn't a few years magazine? And I began to feel but had actually come to person- tions. She ushered me into a ago, or hundreds of years ago, good about feeling bad about ify it, yet once their plaudits and chair, adding, "He's a spiritual- we're talking tens of thousands feeling good. At last, scientific Nobel Prizes had been safely ist." of years ago - " objectivity and watertightness pocketed they turned some of An alarm bell in the back of I gaped. had prevailed over metaphysical their attention to matters of the my mind started ringing. For me, " - and," he paused dramati- wooliness. But then I began to mind, of life, death, birth, spiritualism and science went cally, "You were just as stubborn feel bad about feeling good about rebirth. Matters which that same together nowhere near as well as, and irksome then as you are feeling bad about feeling good. establishment has steered well say, union ents managers and now!" He laughed. Was a science-based education clear of, dismissing it as the closing my mind to concepts that realm of cranks and fortune- strange trousers. I was an engi- I gaped some more. What science was too arrogant to tellers. Not that it's easily under- neering student. At Imperial did he mean, "stubborn and irk- admit that it couldn't explain? stood, though. College. I had no time for Russell some"? More to the point, what Grant wannabees peddling pseu- was all that about priests and Peter took leave of us later I think I prefer differential doscience. Differential equations temples and thousands of years? that morning, vanishing out of equations. They're far more suddenly seemed like far more I asked him, and he told me. Not my life as abruptly as he had respectable. reassuring territory. So what did this life but another, one of thou- entered it. Well, this life, at Andy Sinharay I do? sands that each one us lived. I least. I thought that making a "Erm, hello, Peter, how do was more than just a mere IC joke about seeing him again in 1005 CAREERS FAIR Icgtocu

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travel:peru james madden 0 simon baker - expanded unnecessarily to fill the available space. Firstly, let me assure you this is me, honest, not To solve this, how about, for example, cutting the some dodgy Canadian DJ trying to dupe you. It's fat from departments such as the enormous good to talk, but there are limits. Since Her Registry that seems to do little apart from issue Majesty could hardly accuse someone of being an Council Tax exemption forms and add up our impostor just in case, surely calls are checked to exam marks. Better still, why not put the whole see that they are from who they should be. I sus- of Sherfield administration out to competitive pect that some switchboard operator may receive tender as has been done in the Civil Service. a job transfer to the Tower of London. Earlier in the week, I read an article in the Daily The Beit Quad refurbishment fiasco rumbles Telegraph suggesting that in deprived inner city on with the news that, shock horror, it would be areas, teachers rather than parents are to blame very expensive to move the Union to Sherfield. for the poor performance of children. Fair enough Now the fact that everyone else in College knew you say. Must be written by some smart arse from this from day one inevitably leads one to ask what a right wing think tank who went to Eton. This the hell College Estates are playing at. God only article was in fact written by a teacher who works knows how much money has been wasted on in an inner city comprehensive which until about architect's fees and misguided feasibility studies. three years ago was one of the worst performers The obvious way forward is to convert the Biology in the country. By changing headteacher, scrap- department to provide accommodation and ping lunatic progressive teaching methods and refurbish Beit Hall thus giving the required con- getting, dare I say it, back to basics, GCSE pass ference facilities next to existing amenities. To rates have more than quadrupled in three years. move all the administration and the Union was Teaching unions are constantiy moaning about not clearly going to be prohibitively expensive. being treated as a professional body of people, but However, the motives for wanting this are com- it is hardly surprising that the vocal minority of pletely understandable. For the first time, senior bad teachers that cling to failed practices harm the people in College have asked what actually gets whole profession. done in Sherfield. Why do we need such a large As regular as the National Lottery draw is the department to manage an organisation the size of griping and whingeing about this national institu- Imperial, where a lot of decisions are taking by tion. Recently there has been a storm of protest individual departments anyway? By moving them over the allocation of money. Too right I say. I've into a smaller building, this bureaucratic monster been buying tickets every week since it started could be reduced in size and made more efficient. and they haven't given me as much as a tenner. Nobody can dispute the chronic overmanning in Being forced to watch Anthea Turner every week Sherfield, where the various departments have to check I have lost is almost too much to bear.

problem sheets to satisfy the hungry beast. Eating michael ludlam up all our free time. It is starting to make me This is my third year at Imperial. The last two worry, oh I should be working, not writing this went quite well. Exams were passed and course column. I should stay in to work, not go out and work was relatively simple. I was enjoying myself, meet people and enjoy myself. It's like they no had good friends. I was partaking in that getting longer want me to expand my horizons. older bit, the whole learning experience. I came It is cyclic problem, the more one person wor- back ready to start my third year at the beginning ries about their mark it makes everyone else of this month expecting more of the same. worry and so on. People are frightened of not I got it wrong. Pretty much everything has keeping up. We are all beavering away becoming changed. It is as if everyone I know who is in their excellent scientists, engineers and medics but not final year has been clipped in a whopping great vat very good people. If you weren't a geek when you of sincerity. As if someone somewhere is desper- arrived they are trying hard to turn you into one. ately trying to take out all the fun of being at col- So when it comes time to play, we play far too lege. The word on the street, in the lecture the- hard. How can the Rector be surprised that there atre, in the bars has changed to "jobs jobs jobs" fol- is a big drink and drug problem here. What better lowed closely behind by "marriage, mortgage and way to forget all the stress than get completely off kids." It's getting kinda depressing. Suddenly I your face so you remember none of it. We've all have all this work that needs doing today, not in done it haven't we? I have seen perfectly normal May like I was used too. Ok so maybe I was huge- good healthy people turn into nervous wrecks, ly naive, I didn't really listen to all those warnings through an excessively large work load. about this place. I discovered my worse fear - My reckoning goes that college should be Imperial College means degree machine. about an experience, about joining the ride and Those who did not reach the hurdle of second enjoying yourself, enjoying your course and the year exams have been discarded by the way side. rest of your life. Dare I say it, there is more to the No more friendly resits, fall below and you're out. ride than your course. The pressures of the our Even those who failed just one exam are no longer course are immense. Does college really believe welcome. It is hardly the friendly little sweet col- that they only want good academics and not well lege I thought it was. It's like that pit monster in balanced individuals? However we do not have one of the Star Wars films, it's gotta have those much choice, we have to play the game. What sacrifices. All those course work assignments and else we do? kay, I know many of you spend Friday morning in various states of consciousness at the back of the lecture theatre. But have you O ever wondered how much con- It's all in the mind scious control you have over your own thoughts and actions? This month at the Royal Society, Sarah Tomlin grapples with consciousness Jeffrey Gray, a professor of psychology at the Institute of Psychiatry, discussed the problem of consciousness and who should solve it. 'pftiC^TJ.:^ M K"£: \.. /i>t>g .wife 'fM ,':;, Miy:"ky;.: There is very little agreement on what the problem with consciousness is. Some people will always argue that consciousness is a mystery of life that can never be explained. However, most scientists now agree that consciousness is somehow linked to brain activity. Have you ever rons. But another alternative is a kind of panpsy- this sentence, your eyes are following the words, had too many beers and noticed the pub spin- chism (unfortunately nothing to do with a small your brain is mentally processing their shape and ning around you? If so you will 'realise that sub- guy with a goatee and pointy ears playing the meaning, but how much of this activity are you stances like alcohol, which alter brain chemistry, pipes) in which all matter shares in conscious-actually aware of ? also alter consciousness. Perhaps then, a good ness. This view has recently been expressed by This raises the question that if so much brain place to begin understanding consciousness is to the mathematician Roger Penrose in his book activity and subsequent behaviour is subcon- look at what makes the brain special. The trou- The Emperor's New Mind: concerning comput-scious (including reflex actions , such as remov- ble is, of course, that scientists are still arguing ers, minds and the laws of physics. He suggests ing your hand from a hot stove) then what does about the best way to do this. that the secret of consciousness may have some- conscious experience add to our behaviour that Historically, neuroscientists have gained a lot thing to do with the mysteries of quantum mec- the subconscious cannot do by itself? Jeffrey of insight into the workings of the brain by hanics, since science has so far Gray explains studying patients with brain damage. failed to explain either properly. "Along with everything else that that, This, by Occasionally we get a glimpse into another per- As a psychologist, Jeffrey Freud got wrong, he also the ^ » not son's consciousness: for example, patients who Gray believes that a satisfactory , ,i , Freudian subcon- behave as if the left side of space, and even their theory of consciousness should own bodies, had ceased to exist. Dr. Oliver try to explain as many aspects of wrongly treated the subcon- s c 0 u s n e s s Sacks, author oi Awakenings and The Man Who it as possible and should be able scious as a mystery." Along with Mistook His Wife For A Hat has written some to answer some key questions. How did con- everything else of the most sympathetic and wonderful tales I scious experience evolve and how does it help that Freud got wrong, he also wrongly treated have ever read about people suffering from an animal survive? How are conscious experi- the subconscious as a mystery. It is not." these unimaginable mental conditions. ences linked to brain events and how do they Increasingly, scientists understand in more and Many neuroscientists believe that conscious- alter behaviour? The problem with such an more detail how the firing of neurons is linked ness will ultimately be explained in terms of ambitious, all-embracing approach, is that the to subconscious behaviour. It is the fact that brain structure and the firing of groups of neu- concept of consciousness is so rich and complex some of this mental activity becomes conscious that Professor Gray admits he has not that is the real mystery. Can You Believe Your Brain? yet come up with a simple defini- tion of it. He is not alone in this: Loo link Francis Crick has written "we did Researchers in 'California have recently demohi: not attempt to define conscious- strated vision without awareness (also called ness itself because of the clangers 'blindsight') in normal sighted volunteers, The Margaret Thatcher of premature definition." (If this Blindsight has previously h bed in soine Illusion seems like a cop-out, try defining patients vw ''lliii notse 'ssfhe the word "gene" - you will not find : location ol objects near them, they perfbtnl well it easy). above the level oi pure chance. The novel Sometimes it is easier to begin Filling in the gap: Cover approach in this latest study was to create the. one eye, stare at the dot on defining something by what it is same effect in sighted observers by presenting the right-the lines on the not, and it is astonishing how :tbemvwith ; )ne display, left should join up. much subconscious activity takes place in our brains. There is a lot which the observers were asked to locate. The Is This a Spiral? of experimental evidence to show other pattern was similar, except that the dots that consciousness always comes were in pairs, and the observers claimed they

after the brain processes to which could not distinguish the 'targetare3<;:ftom: the it is linked and more importantly, it comes too late to affect them. sforcecl to make a guess al.x 'lion of the target, the observers were just as successful (70* This agrees with the observation . |>80% correct answers) as they were when they that conscious events occur serial-" cot lid see the target area This is one example of ly while neural processing operates how much processing may be going on in our. in parallel. During the few sec- onds or so that it takes you to read CALLING ALL 2ND & 3RD YEAR ENGINEERING UNDERGRADUATES WISHING TO TAKE A YEAR OUT

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A member of the British-American Tobacco Group -theatre: volponear.k summers shall be the sole benefactor of his will, beliefs reinforced by Volpone's parasite and trickster, There are none more spectacular than the Mosca. Following his performance in the BBC's National's recreations of the classics at the The Singing Detective, Michael Gambon is a nat- Olivier. So much so in this case that the design ural Volpone, although it would be nice to see and direction outshines what is a very creditable him play something other than a sick man and a performance by a largely well-known cast. The grumpy bachelor. production as a whole is an outstanding success Simon Russell Beale had little difficulty in for Matthew Warchus in his debut as a profes- stealing the audience's affections as the intriguing sional director on the London stage. Jonson is yet loathsome Mosca. But the star of the show considered by many to be the English Moliere, a was Robin Soan's Corvino, the foolish Venetian theory successfully borne out by Warchus in this merchant who even tries to get Volpone to sleep production. with his wife in order to claim his fortune. He Jonson's black comedy revolves around the had the audience completely convinced, and the "Venetian miser Volpone who feigns sickness in two faced nature of his character was captured order to trick the wealthy of Venice into bestow- perfectly. ing gifts on him. For these acts, they believe they Overall it is a superb production. ill*' ""t-ji theatre: trouble sleeping away, to live in the Daley house-hold. This all f|lt< 'fill;!! grasshopper proves too much for Terry when his secret pom - videos are discovered - the only release for his Some 10 minutes after leaving Victoria we sexual frustrations. He is torn between loyalty WMk :.: -illfll pulled into a station that looked like it had been and love for his mother and the sorry state of pulled out of an inter-galactic airport. "Canary denial he suffers through his attraction to Angela Wharf?" I mused. The huge, towering, grey- whuch finally cracks his manly shell. white office block glistening in the lights in front of me would have been enough to fool the keanest Fleet Street Editor. But no, sure as I had expected I was in... wait for it... East Croydon! You may have thought that SP . ilpi Croydon is nothing but a dull, leafy sub- IT :|| urb. But tucked away just behind the Hi It is 1 S-i2S hxfay; until railway station in the upstairs floor of a i: like-named pub (as fringe theatres always are) lies "The Warehouse". With hdinnuoMinU) .lpoliii a rninute to spare I hurried into the dark- mil 12 ened theatre, the audience looked at me expectandy, I bowed... and took my Wis seat. mvrdanir- the show by bill whe- An established focus of local thes-

1 pian enthusiasm, the Warehouse was Ill'' preparing to be graced by a production liiilill^lillit) . ) lilill of the prodigal Aussie, Nick Ward. Iper -40 Trouble Sleeping is his seventh produc- tion (not including his 3 prize-winning ' lllllllll^^ films), which at the age of 33, is a prisoner roll block h by david lengthy repertoire. ilt#:: ' '4111 The play opens with Rosemary Daley (Sandra Voe) watching an egg boil - for the full three minutes. Perhaps it's a device to paint a picture that is as sim- ple as can be of Rosemary and her son Terry (Peter-Hugo Daly) but it is also a metaphor for the shell that is their life which - under a lit- It's not that Nick Ward doesn't manage to tle pressure - can so easily crack. invoke feelings of sympathy in his audience, its Terry is a BR worker who harbours an obses- just that these are due to the pathetic characters sion with fire-arms which takes shape in his rather than the accomplished performances. He predilection for clay-pigeon shooting. However, himself says that some actors have trouble things take a sharp change in direction when adapting from screen to stage and Miranda Rosemary finds out that her well married sister, Pleasance (a familiar "The Bill"/ "Casualty" face) Ursula (Eve Pearce), is ill and will be coming to is an unfortunate victim of this syndrome. Ward live in her old home once more. As if this weren't can conjure a promising scene, but like a bad enough upset for poor Terry, Ursula invites Croydon's "fools-wharf" appearance, he does Angela (Miranda Pleasance), an attractive run- not produce the feelings, only simple imitations. gig/interview: trans-global and is the driving force that holds their diverse iistiru sound together. underground xi The band hopes to find time in the New Year fllrllp. . ' :':'A >;' After an excellent set from Tribal Drift, to take a month of gigging to record a new some funky hip-hop from Eusebe and admirable album, from which they should get an entirely mixing from Coldcut, we were finally treated to new live set. If the material they played tonight Transglobal Underground. So was it worth the is anything to go by, then this will be well worth wait? checking out. nov - brixton academy £9 Well, quite a few of the crowd failed to take Asked if they have any message to get across, oasis 5 DOV - earls court - £14 ; the pace when confronted with an extended 90 Dubla said that they want to try and break down *:'HAA.:AAAA; 'A.'' ' € A A|; A; A:; everything from crashing guitar riffs and rapping the Netherlands, where it receives regular radio ;fA;;,/ Y to extensive bongo and drum workouts. play. young gods - 11 nov - forum -

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K Before the gig, I chatted to the band's bassist, If there is one thing the band hates, it's Dubla, who promised that they would play four pigeon-holing. Dubla tells me half-jokingly that if 1 or five new songs. They didn't disappoint and they ever manage to completely categorise although the fans cheered the fami liar 'na-na, Transglobal then he'll move on. He talks at length na-na-ner' of old favourite 'Temple Head', I on the stupidity of the system and decides that couldn't help diinking that it was overshadowed he wants Transglobal to be the next Britpop by the newer material. band. Tme to his word the band announced, ish It's easy to see how vocalist Natacha Atlas 'Well, well, Britpop goes multiracial" over the 50 maintains a solo career in addition to her work PA at the end of the gig. Looking at the smiles on with the band. Her mix of singing and Indian people's faces after the gig, I can only hope so. style chants underpins all of Transglobal's music album: superchunk - album: asian dub 1 here's where the strings foundation - facts and IA 50 come iruk fictions,.iau l shore A:A::AA.:K; ii 23 It's all in a name. Unfortunately for Superchunk, I didn't know what to expect but I was yllison me the reference to large vomit' in their name is impressed right fromth e start of this album with true. The band appear to be Bob Mould the fusion of Eastern rhythms and Western te- wannabees who have veered towards Madder beats. rn Rose but lost the whole plot along the way, while The album contains a unique blend of musi- Ac 'Here's where the strings come in' sounds as cal genres, with tracks ranging from the incredi- though it was recorded in someone's garage on a bly mellow 'Journey' to some very hard edged DAT machine. rap tunes towards the end of the album. They Recent single, Hyper Enough' is the highest even lay a strong, funky electric guitar sound over quality fare on offer. But, it's the first song and a jungle beat on 'TH9', while 'Thacid' could have from here on the album gets progressively worse. been written by Josh Wink. From 'Iron On' onwards there is a deep gorge of As their name would suggest, there are a lot songs that all sound the same so it's not a case of of Asian style melodies. However, these are not the best being save .until last. so much emphasised as blended in with the var- I had great hopes for this album since ied collection of instrumental and sampled Superchunk had supported the great Teenage sounds and this mixture of styles compensates Fanclub. Alas, this time the Fannies' judgement for the lyrics, which sound a little harsh at times. proved to be just about as good as Jacques All in all, the twelve tracks cover a lot of Chirac's nuclear policy. Oh well, we all make ground and this is well worth a listen. (7) mistakes. (3) sin; gig: mike peters^ ness, he jovially retorted: "I think that we've got a few trainspotters in here tonight." ! Way back in the echelons of Felix history, I And yet it's remarkable that there aren't remember writing: "Let's get one thing straight - more of the same sort of 'trainspotters' around. hutllu'li i&U'iiniki tins i The Alarm were a great band (a statement '68 Guns', Where were you hiding when the pllip Ay of which should exterminate any street cred I pos- storm broke?', 'Spirit of 76', 'One step closer to ' .... . V sess)." Well, twenty-eight issues later, and still home' and 'No frontiers', to name but a few, are with no street cred to my name, I'm ready to songs that take in influences as diverse as the

: " .... V revise that opinion. Because, after seeing ex- Clash and the Stones, that had something unpre- .xi but Alarm frontman Mike Peters performing an tentious and important to say, and yet which lie acoustic show of songs old and new, the only neglected by so many. conclusion I can draw is that The Alarm weren't Not that this is supposed to sound like an a great band - they were a brilliant one. (But then epitaph. Far from it. The UK and forthcoming I really knew that anyway.) US tours are packed to the rafters and the solo

!'>'! AA AA: AAc- AA:A

AAAIJ;.. Armed with a guitar, a voice and a passion- material, mainly taken from last year's debut, iii|A|k ate dedication to his trade, Mike played two and 'Breathe', stands up entirely on its own merits. xed ver- a half hours of almost flawless gems spanning a The new songs may not have quite managed to fifteen year history. capture the exquisiteness of old yet but as The songs were interspersed with anecdotes proven tonight, they will certainly age well. And :'< *>' A A: ;' f A A Av; and humour - a testament to Mike's ongoing in an era of meaningless, hungover music culture, ? A "s A A Aj -A. A A /f }y "H All A bonhomie with his fans. On one occasion, when that's way more than you've reason to expect. A- a large number of obscurities were being like I once said - Mike Peters deserves your requested by fans eager to prove their die-hardi- attention now.

album: the smashing 'Bodies', 'Thirty-three' and 'Bullet with...' redeem his stature and hark to the earlier days of pumpkins - mellon collie 'Gish' and 'Siamese Dream'. Though not every track is a gorging grunge and infinite sadness^ sshopper landmark, to attempt superficial comparisons to 80's style revival would be totally out of place. To spend 24 hours with the Smashing Pumpkins Sweet cherishable numbers like 'Stumbleine', jar to'Black and he".seems to would be impossible joy. To spend two hours or 'By starlight' and 'Farewell and goodnight' are PJay almost eA^ipstru- A so with this album in their royal presence is thus evidence enough for me that Corgan's talent, but a bareable compression. Split betwixt two relentiessly emitted from my CD player, is halves, perfecdy complementary, like night and unique. to pigeon h< iJ day, dawn and dusk, rest 28 new tracks. The two Incidentally, the last song calls on the hith- nonetheless..: CDs, crammed with the same number of years erto unexposed voice of James Iha, making you worth of Billy Corgan's meticulously woven wonder if this man could possibly attain saintiy melodies, may be verging on the verbose, but status. He also wrote "Take me down" (a sure then we're not being given a tour of McD's. contender for the tide of best-track) not so In contrast with most other big bands, the much a love song as a ray of hope at the twilight Pumpkins haven't "matured", "progressed", or of Corgan's bitter day. I wish it was mine. "diversified", not because they tried not to, but Now you may think that dais is hopeless because everything they do is peculiarly idiosyn- infatuation, but you'd be wrong. There is no cratic. other reason to buy this album other than for Corgan's lyrics may be at times self-indul- pure musical delight. Don't pretend you need to gent, not to mention inaccessible, but songs like understand it, you don't. (8) CAREERS IN NETWORKING Wing Chun Kung Fu Street self defence Keeping fit with a purpose How the best Group tuition Apparatus training computer One to one training graduates Free lesson with this advert secure the By Renowned Kung Fu brightest Teacher Sifu Andrew Sofos

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E «i J D _ C u ra o 0 = 0 celluloid guide:,,,, film: jadee love with since college, is the prime suspect. Clues which lead to the suspect are finger- odeon kensington r" David Corelli is an assistant district attorney who prints on the murder weapon; sightings of Trina is called to investigate the murder of a prominent visiting the millionaire's beach house; and a silver millionaire. While investigating the crime, he is box engraved with the Chinese character for pocahowtas Jade - the name of one of the millionaire's many lovers. Fiorentino gives a cool, if unsurprising per- formance as a two-timing clinical psychologist. Mentally Trina appears to be a bit of a weirdo and sexually she is very liberated - a side of her psyche which her husband is ignorant about. Written by Basic Instinct screenwriter Joe Eszterhas, Jade contains few surprises. The mil- lionaire who is into bonking young attractive women and the attorney who is in love with the prime suspect have both featured in films of this type before. There is, of course, the obligatory car chase thrown in but this comes across as fminelK 1.30,4.10,6.50,9.30 being so preposterous and clumsily filmed that it does little to raise the adrenaline levels of the audience. For the first half hour or so, Jade seems unpromising although Shawn Murphy's music score does well to build up the tension in the opening scene where the murder is heard but not seen. K 9.30:: confronted with the fact that Trina Gavin (Linda In the end director William Friedkin does Hi Fiorentino from The Last Seduction), the wife manage to shape an entertaining film, even the net 3.40,6.30,9.20 of his best friend and the woman he has been in though it is a bit predictable and tacky at times.

film: the horseman on the are enforcing quarantine, but Angelo still makes the detour. rOOfnagpie The Horseman on the Roof is adapted from the book by Jean Giono: some adaptations seem 1.45.4.05,6.25,8.50 The Horseman on the Roof, or for those endear- to skim over events trying to squash everything ing people biking level three French the original into 100 minutes, but The Horseman on the Roof title is Le Hussard sur le Toit, will be playing at is the complete opposite. It is long, and each the London Film Festival on Monday. minute is saturated with events. Characters

^'^^i-yi/^:Mmgf''' AA«" It's 1830's France and cholera is spreading come and go but the overall feeling is everything AAifcAAiSYlAAftMA* Ai like a wild rumour through the country obliter- is known about them only after a short dialogue. ating villages and leaving dead bodies for the Each screen is complemented by the changing A|liii:£>:;il|i scavenging crows. Angelo is a colonel of the scenery, as Angelo and Pauline's journey takes : AilAiAiiA; A f i i? Hussars fleeing the Austrian agents sent to them to a different idyllic part of France. l| A if tili i A tiii track him down, for Italy has been invaded by Director Jean-Paul Rappeneau binds the Austria. The words viva Italia' are Angelo's, and £6.50, £4 matinees film together well as the large number of events he defends them with fist and sword. and different backdrops would usually just cre- :f?h:(sc^ ekirte Angelo finally arrives in Manosque searching ate confusion. Each scene flows effortlessly into for his friend Guiseppe. The local population has another and you slowly become amazed by

: fIf< .f§!lfrto;ABj sA';; j ¥* A i :.. been driven mad by the paranoia of the cholera Angelo's character; his resourcefulness, strength /^Illliri i#0s# epidemic. Only hysteria and chaos rule, and after and the pity he shows to the dying, risking his iliiAAi.n: A :A being falsely accused of poisoning the local water own health. Pauline then strikes you as a stub-

Ai ii? well, Angelo is driven onto the rooftops. Above bom woman, caring only for herself and her UlS|XT Ml 3. lOpili him are the crows waiting for him to die and desire to find her husband. There is a love story below the mob want to hang him. in this film somewhere, but it doesn't surface 'KivAlitAA: The rain comes and Angelo finds shelter in until late in the film, since Angelo is an army offi- : rAAAA' a.!*vi; J-'Sx-'i Ar.sy;: A "AA; feels obliged to help Pauline on her journey to Rappaneau never lets you forget the bitter taste i;i A.i'-eyff;.,...:'-. find her husband. The journey is fraught with when people die at random and the look of fear, danger, avoiding the cholera and the army, who death and pain in each victim's sunken eyes. BUST AGUT comedy club fri. nov. 10th DAN FREEDMAN TONY BURGESS

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With 3 weeks remairring of our holiday we broke £5 a day. They are doing well if they live to be south from Peru and 50, though many will die in cave-ins before that. They only let us 'Gringos' in because we crossed the border into come bearing gifts; coca leaves for their Bolivia at the border town endurance, fuel for their lamps, dynamite for their mining, that sort of thing. of Copacabana. South West of Potsoi in the Altiplano lies one of the world's largest salt plains, the 'Salar Bolivia is the poorest country in the western d'Uyuni'. 10 billion tons of virtually pure salt hemisphere and it certainly shows, there are stretching dead flat across hundreds of square only 2 paved roads in the whole of the country kilometres of land, broken up only by the and luckily we travelled one of them into La occasional lone island of rock. Local belief is Paz. La Paz is renowned as being the highest that it was formed when the seas dried up and capital in the world - not true. It is not the all of the fish were turned into islands. When I capital of Bolivia, merely its biggest city and asked why Bolivia's economic situation could centre of commerce... I digress. More worrying not be improved by export of this salt, I was than La Paz's lack of bona fide tide is its lack of told of how Chile took Bolivia's one access to breathable air; sat in a valley below the Andean the ocean rendering it landlocked. This land Altiplano it is at 4000m above sea level and is will be returned within a decade when Chile where Olympic has exhausted the athletes train before silver mines there competitions. After which currently life in London, a constitute 10% of its good 30m above sea m Gross Domestic level (50m if you're Product. on the second floor) H From Uyuni I La Paz proved to be travelled back to La literally breath-taking Paz on one of the and the slightest world's highest exertion would leave railways and from you gasping like a La Paz back to Lima fish on dry land. The and from there to ...the slightest one advantage of all London. The this puffing and sadness at leaving exertion would panting is that upon these places and return to Britain, you especially the people feel like you have was immense. The super-human geography is strength. stunning but it is the people that endear South East of La themselves to you. Paz lies the city of I They're not in the Potsoi. A silver town rat race, they take during Spanish mle, each day as it comes it is now mined co- and it may sound operatively by the local men. These "men" blessedly simple but its not - its hard. Its also (starting at age 10) live on what silver they extremely well worth seeing with your own mine, some carry over a ton of metal ore on eyes. Contact me, James Madden, via the Felix their backs in a day in tunnels 4ft high by office if you like. candlelight and for their trouble they will earn RCS Union General Meeting (UGM)

Friday 3rd Nov. - Ents Lounge - lpm prompt.

The following posts are up for grabs:

Ents. Chair I Asst. Hon. Sec. I Clubs Cttee Chair

Broadsheet Asst. Ed. - ( has to be a fresher ) / Publicity Officer

Asst. A AO I Handbook Ed. I RCSARep. I Archivist.

Ents. Chair - Not really looking for a chairperson ( unless they really want to ) but for a solid core of motivated, serious but fun-loving people who can organise events.

Asst. Hon. Sec - If you want to know more about the union's goings on then this is an ideal position. You minute meetings and help the Hon. Sees throughout the year.

The above two posts will probably be involved in helping organise the Annual Dinner.

Clubs Cttee Chair - Will coordinate the RCS Clubs & Societies and help revive lost ones.

Broadsheet Asst. Ed. - Has to be a fresher - Will help write articles - although there's nothing stopping anybody else from contributing to our publication - gather articles, and help collate Broadsheet.

Asst. AAO - Will sit on Accademic affairs meetings also shadowing the AAO, and will also be the Bookshop Rep.

Handbook Ed. - With the help of the Broadsheet Team, will look for advertising sponsors and write next years Freshers' Handbook ( Archivist will also help out here.)

RCS A Rep. - Will liaise with the Ex. Students Association, representing the current students.

Archivist - College life can be quite hectic and we need to keep tabs on it. Everyday becomes a new page in history and you'll have to maintain a reference/filing system for the future.

Publicity Officer - The RCS is only as good as how well events are publicised; a motivated and imaginative person is required to make sure the other students know what's going on.

Friday 3rd Nov. - Ents Lounge - lpm prompt. DIARY FELIX FRIDAY NOVEMBER 3RD 1995 . TWENTY-ONE

friday Saturday Sunday 5 november november november

Rag Meeting Gliding Club Gliding Club Gliding at Lasham Airfield. Gliding at Lasham Airfield 1.10 pm Ents Lounge. Regular meeting. Contact [email protected] Saturday Come to Thursday meeting first. Pakistan Society

2.00 - 4.00 pm Basketball practice in the Food union gym. Bring trainers! Contact Kashif, Sunday lunch available in Da Vinci's aero II, [email protected] Photographic between 1.30 and 3 pm for £3. Ents Plus Everton v Blackburn on the big screen. The return of the 'Pop Tarts' DJs, bringing Society you pure pop classics, from Abba to Wham, Sunday from 60's to 90's, with 'Shaft'. Entry is £1, The photographic society has has started the or free with an ents card, or if you're new year dynamically, looking for inspiration suitably dressed in 70's bad taste style. BUT, in the cinema. We visited the 'magnum 'cos we keep selling out, we can only cinema' exhibition at the Royal Festival Hall Afro Caribbean guarantee admission to ents card holders which commemorates the centenary of before 11 pm. Be earlyl cinema, featuring two hundred dazzling Society photographs which capture all aspects of friday film-making. The Afro Caribbean Society is making a We witnessed Marilyn Monroe's good comeback and is stronger than ever this magical love affair with the camera, and year, with the full support of our numerous, were amused by Phillippe Halsman's dedicated freshers. stoic successful photograph of her famous wiggle. The objectives of the society is to Nicolas Tikhomiroff expressed the mood of promote and publicize the cultures of Africa 12.00 The Report his characters with his exceptional use of and the Caribbean. This is reflected through The news and features magazine designed to light.We were so bewitched by the brilliant our social and cultural events, such as keep students informed, enlightened and show that we could not keep our hands off dances, food nights, fashion shows, entertained. the merchandise; postcards, keyrings, and seminars, etc... 12.30 MovieZone even toilet paper with a musical score on it. This year, everything kicks off with All the views and news from the Cinema. Along the way, we kept loosing members as The Nubian Jam' - our party on Friday 17th 12.50 Level 3 they "quickly" took photographs of the November (a fortnight from now), in the Wacky show with thrills & spills. scenery along the Thames. The trip ended Union Concert Hall. This will provide the 1.30 Shutdown to BBCI with a cup of coffee and a long conversation perfect opportunity for you to join up, meet Neighbours. on eveyones' aspirations of being famous. us, and get involved. We are also planning to The Society meets every Tuesday in have trips to Alton Towers, as well club Coming Soon: Southside Lounge at 1.00 pm, so come along nights, bowling, formal dinners, and a The Pub Guide and find out what we get up to, or contact us leavers' do at the end of the year. We go to Where to go in London for a good time and via email: [email protected] events at other ACS in London too. a piss up. If you need more info, or want to make Freshers Documentary on the life and trials a suggestion or contribution, please email me of Freshers in the first few weeks of their or Destiny at annal@ic or deal@ic, or call academic year. Jewish society Destiny's mobile (make his day!) on 0956 349 541, or - use the union pigeonholes. "Bruchim Haba'im" - Welcome - to Imperial College. Next Monday is our Bagel Lunch, really this time - no contradictory info we hope - and we would like you to icsf come along, eat, chat, join up, and get involved! This coming Tuesday sees the The lunch will be held in the SCR in continuation of our X-Files season, care of Beit Quad - facing the Union, go diagonally STOIC. We will be showing Episodes 2 and to the forward right-hand staircase, and up 3, the fun and cynicism starting at 7pm. one floor - starting at 12.15pm. Membership is £4 for the year. For For more info please contact more info; [email protected] or http:- [email protected] Awww.ph.ic.ac.uk/moontg/ TWENTY-TWO. FELIX FRIDAY NOVEMBER 3RD 1 995 DIARY

We also hope to make all these forms of 1. Although posters are necessary, the Greek Culture more widely known, while at amount of posters that are up at the moment The Hellenic the same time educate ourselves in the is excessive and very often posters are placed cultures of other countries. In short, we want on no-poster areas. to make more friends. 2. More posters means less trees. Society The highlight of this term's events is the 3. More posters means less effective posters The Hellenic society is a national society first 'Greek Evening' of the year which will since no-one reads them. organised by Greek IC students, and its take place in the Main Dining Hall of the 4. Clubs are spending a considerable amount purpose is to cater for all those interested in Sherfield on the 1st of December with Greek of money on posters, which could be used Greek culture, be it in the shape of music, food, wine and live music until the early more constructively. philosophy, dance, science, food, wine, hours. Then comes the 'Electroacoustic To set an example the Hellenic Society language, literature, or whatever else. Acroasis', a live music event in the union hereby undertakes to put no more than three lounge where student bands from IC and posters per event in the designated poster other universities can come and play. We area, and to take them down properly once monday hope to get a wide variety of styles from they expire. traditional greek all the way to heavy metal, Remember, you don't need to be a member 6 via jazz and indie. to be informed of the Hellenic Society's november We also invite big names from the activities. You can subscribe to our e-mail list. domain of science, culture, economics and Just e-mail a message to: Cross Country politics to give lectures. [email protected] Regular Monday night run. Meet at 5.30 pm Apart from socialising, we also feel that Subject must be empty, and the content of at bottom of Union staircase. as a large Society of IC we have the obligation the message should be: subscribe hellenic- to strive towards the common good. We have society Your Name. Concert Band therefore decided to bring up an issue that we You can also visit our Web page at 5.15 - 6.45 pm. Great Hall, Sherfield. Any attach great importance to, namely excessive http://daedalus.ee.ic.ac.uk: 8001/ ability. poster abuse or poster pollution, as we put it. Hope to see you in our events soon.

Ski Club 12.30 - 1.15 pm, Southside Upper Lounge. Regular meeting. tuesday Wednesday

Student Industrial Society 8 Meeting 12.00 - 2.00 pm. In tennis room november november upstairs in Union building. Regular meeting. IC Sailing Club IC Sailing Club IC Symphony Orchestra Come and see us in Southside Upper Meet 12.15 pm outside Southside to go Great Hall, 7 - 9 pm. 2nd orchestra. Lounge, 12.45 - 1.45 pm, to arrange a sail, sailing. Regular meeting. have a gossip, etc. Everybody welcome! ICCAG Regular meeting. Skate Society 8.15 pm, Weeks Hall basement. Soup run Meet 12.15 pm Southside Lounge. Regular for the homeless. Regular meeting. Cathsoc meeting. Sir Leon Bagritt Centre, at 12.00 pm. Trip to Brixton Skate Park after the meeting ArtSoc Level 1 Mech Eng. Regular meeting. - please bring pads. 9.30 pm, Union Dining Hall. Come and sign up for the many trips to IC Bridge Club Consoc musicals, plays, ballet, opera, etc. 6 pm in the Clubs Committee Room, Union Building. Regular meeting. 1.00 pm, Mech Eng 748, Nigel Evans. monday ICCAG icsf 7.00 pm, STOIC. Xfiles: Files 2A, 2B Talk by the Simon Community (a charity for the homeless] Please come along if you are OpSoc Rehearsal interested in helping the homeless in any Sandy Wilson's The BoyFriend. way. 7.30 pm UCH. Regular meeting. IC Symphony Orchestra Great Hall, 7-10 pm. Ents A relatively easy, and totally legal way to win Ents £50, courtesy of STA Travel! Pit your wits Frolik, 8 - lam and totally free. Curries, against the ICU font of all knowledge at our chillis and dish of the day for only £1 at Da bar trivia in DaVinci's. 8pm start. Vinci's.

tuesday Wednesday DIARY FELIX FRIDAY NOVEMBER 3RD 1995 . TWENTY-THREE

Indian Society next diary Careers Information

There is one Careers Talk this coming week The Indian Society presents an Asian deadline: at 1 - 1.50pm. adaptation of Tuesday 9th November: noon, "The Actuarial Profession" by Sally Cyrano Bridgeland, Senior Consultant at bacon & November Woodrow, in Maths LT 140. starring Bollywood's Naseeruddin Shah at All students are welcome to attend. No need the Royal National Theatre on Thursday, to book - just turn up. 9th November, 1995 6th "Positive Applications - a session for students from ethnic minorities" is an Limited tickets: Careers Survey Interactive Workshop run on Wednesday £6.50 (members) 8th November from 2-4 pm in Huxley £8.50 (non-members) 1996 Room 344. Sign up in the Careers Office. High Fliers Research Limited is conducting a survey, sponsored by The For information and advice come to the Contacts: Independent, of 25 universities around the Careers Office, Room 310 Sherfield, which committee members in JCR at United Kingdom to evaluate the graduate is open from 10am to 5:15pm Monday to lunchtimes. recruitment programs of major companies. Friday. e-mail: [email protected] We are looking for a manager to organise and [email protected] coordinate our activities here in Imperial [email protected] College. Subwarden Wanted The position lasts until late March, and the performance of its duties should take no For Garden Hall more than one day a week. The salary for this position is £800 (£400 in the autumn Applications are invited for the position thui^sday and £400 in the spring). of Subwarden of Garden Hall (a hall of 85 If interested, please send a CV and residents situated in 10-12 Prince's cover letter to High Fliers research Ltd, PO Gardens) which becomes vacant at the end november Box 442, Cambridge CB3 9EQ or fax them of this term. The subwarden assists the on 01233 575 431. Warden in all aspects (pastoral, social, Blood Donating administrative and disciplinary) of the 9.00 am - 4.00 pm, Southside gym. running of the hall. Please reply by letter, enclosing a CV and giving the names of two Yacht Club Meeting friday referees, to : 1.00 pm, Lecture Theatre 2, Physics. Dr SP Walker, Regular meeting. lcr Warden, Weeks Hall Gliding Club november Further information can be obtained 1 pm. Aero 266. Regular meeting. from Dr Simon Walker (extension 47058) Rag Meeting or Dr Ian Metcalfe (extension 45585). Christian Union The closing date for applications is 6.30 - 7.45 pm. SCR in the Union. 1.10 pm Ents Lounge. Regular meeting. Friday 17 November 1995. (Right above the bar). Regular meeting. Ents Consoc More belt breaking belly laughs with the Meeting at 1 pm, Southside Upper lounge. bust-a-gut comedy club. This week's top Regular meeting. acts are Dan Freedman "one of the most exciting new talents to emerge from the new Ents comedy generation," plus Tony Burgess, Glamour, sophistication and plastic "top" Mancunian and student favourite. umbrellas, plus the cheapest cocktails in Doors open 8 pm, it's £2.50 or £2 with an Kensington at Da Vinci's cocktail night. ents card. Followed by a night of top tunes Starts at 5pm. 'til 2am. Free to comedy goers, or if you are there before 8pm, or if you've got an thursday entscard! £1 otherwise. friday TWENTY-FOUR . FELIX FRIDAY NOVEMBER 3RD 1 995 LETTERS

LETTERS TO FELIX: REPLIED TO THIS WEEK BY ALEX FEAKES

After twelve months of the Imperial College is fundamental- traying me as some un-informed Ham and work in the Union as the OSC ly different from other British racial bigot. In short, I apologise Chairman last year, I can safely Universities. At one point I to all Overseas students for Mr e^heads say that overseas students con- explained how Imperial has; FN's misinterpretation of my tribute much to the Union's life "Many foreign students as well as comments but I feel I have no Dear Ed, both through the overseas soci- students on 9 to 5 courses who reason to apologise for what I I would like to appeal to any ICU eties and the rest of Clubs and then don't give a shit about the actually said and what I believe. member interested in ham radio. Societies. 'International Night' is Union.... They are here only to Yours Sincerely, The Union's amateur radio club, the largest student organised get a degree." I never once Tim Townend, DP(Clubs and Hamsoc, is currently inactive and event of ICU. It is not, however, accused 'foreigners' exclusively Societies). needs keen members (especially the case that overseas societies but merely highlighted why many licence holders) to get it up and organise events for the sake of of Imperial's members, British or Thank you for allowing us a running once more. overseas societies alone. Just otherwise, are so apathetic glimpse into the Union's book of The club owns £15,000 of check the article in this week's towards their Union. records, but what was actually equipment and has been allocat- issue by the Hellenic Society and I find it only natural that stu- said or the backgrounds of the ed a budget for the coming acad- all this comes into context. dents faced with high academic students referred to fades in emic year. If anyone is interested To conclude, it's the 'ancient work loads are not wholly enthu- importance against the perceived in either running or joining the curse' of our college that IC stu- siastic at the idea of working for attitudes of the students, their club, could they please drop me a dents don't really get involved the Union in their spare time. Union and their Sabbaticals. line via the RCC Exec, pigeon with IC matters; but of those few Indeed the demands placed upon Students will only get involved holes in the Union office. that do, at least 37% are overseas. a student studying in a language in activities and events that Yours etc. Sincerely Yours, other than their own seem truly interest or cater for them, so to Robert Lea, Andreas Mershin. horrific. However I would like to complain that people do not get RCC Chairman. OSC Chairman 1994/95, take this opportunity to detail involved is more an expression of Dear Sir or Madam, Physics Ac Rep 95/96. the reality of student representa- the fact that you cannot be all tion at iCU. things to all people. It is a shame that your letter There at present some 2639 Opportunities are there for all to It's all quickly slides into being an foreign nationals studying at get involved: Imperial's multi- advert for OSC events rather College making up 36.5 % of cultural nature is a strength, Greek to me than taking the opportunity to Imperial's student body. Out of allowing exposure for students answer the letter and the issue. the 52 officers involved in the to other cultures. This is in reply to last week's let- running of Union activities only 5 ter by Mr Daniel Figueras-Niets. Dear Felix, are from overseas. In fact even Since I cannot comment on any- I was concerned and quite the Overseas Clubs Committee Letters may be thing said in council meeting that frankly amazed to read the inac- Chairman is himself British! The commented on by a guest Daniel refers to (I was not pre- curate comments Mr. Figueras quality of Imperial is largely due editor whose sent) this is aimed at anyone who Niets attributed to me in last to the quality of it's overseas stu- opinions are not thinks that overseas students are weeks Felix. Not surprisingly he dents but it is quite clear there is necessarily those of the editor. inactive in Union matters. seems unable to remember the considerable shortfall in their 37% of the college's student half of what was said some three involvement in running Non- Deadline for letters: population is of non-British origin weeks after the event. As a result Academic matters. 6pm Monday. ('overseas students'). This per- I feel obliged to explain exactly I am sorry Mr Figueras-Niets Please bring your union centage puts Imperial among the what I said and in what context. 'felt undignified' [sic], but I card for most multicultural academic At the council meeting in would appreciate it if he could in identification. institutions in the world. question I was outlining how future check his facts before por-

Hall Vacancies Places are now available in twin and triple rooms for new or continuing undergraduate and postgraduate students in halls of residence (Evelyn Gardens and Prince's Gardens). Single rooms are available in Clayponds for postgraduate students. Please contact the Student Accommodation Office, 15 Prince's Gardens (tel: 0171 594 9444). LETTERS AND EDITORIAL FELIX FRIDAY NOVEMBER 3RD 1995 . TWENTY-FIVE

THE FELIX FELIX FOUNDED 1949 the indispensable guide for Felix PRODUCED FOR AND ON BEHALF OF IMPERIAL COLLEGE UNION PUBLICATIONS BOARD contributors and helpers PRINTED BY THE IMPERIAL COLLEGE UNION PRINT UNIT BEIT QUAD PRINCE CONSORT ROAD LONDON SW7 2BB E TELEPHONE/FAX 0171 594 8072 monday, high noon EDITOR: RACHEL WALTERS clubs & societies articles deadline PRINTERS: ANDY THOMPSON AND JEREMY E BUSINESS MANAGER: JULIETTE DECOCK monday 1.20pm ADVERTISING MANAGER: WEI LEE reviewers' meeting COPYRIGHT FELIX 1995. ISSN 1040-0711 monday 6pm K letters deadline academic dress onwards

monday 6pm I can't say I feel a great deal dif- Judging by next week's news meeting ferent now I'm editor, BSc careers fair, we're all heading ARCS. Commemoration Day unavoidably towards a future in Wednesday lpm was very definitely an inconve- financial services. There are a features meeting nience, not an excitement. It was great many difficult questions in wearing a silly garment that kept this life, but at this present thursday night getting caught in the photocopi- moment I'm really wondering if collating er, and having to sit still for three the world genuinely needs so hours. And I felt something of a many merchant bankers. What friday morning fraud when my parents insisted was the point of all those years of on being proud and taking pho- quantum mechanics if we're all another Felix hits the street... tographs. to spend our futures talking in I wondered if they realised silly acronyms about Quality just how many lectures I missed, Value Customer Thresholds. how many problem sheets I copied, how little I appreciated Free Cinema Tickets the priviledge of learning at an portillo elite centre of excellence. But somehow, watching the couple There aren't a great many perks of thousand of us be mis-pro- to being Felix editor, but I knew TO GO WITH THE 39TH LONDON FILM nounced across the stage one by it was all worthwhile when I got one I did find my self wondering to spend a few short minutes FESTIVAL, FELIX IN ASSOCIATION WITH THE what we would all end up doing with the Secretary of State for LONDON FILM FESTIVAL, IS GIVING AWAY 2 with our degrees from Imperial defense. I'm sorry, Ian Bayley, College of Science Technolgy but it just has to be said: Michael SETS OF TAKE 5 TICKETS. and Medicine. Portillo is quite simply the per- THE TAKE 5 TICKET WILL GIVE THE, LUCKY I am extremely grateful to son who is the most unpleasant, WINNER 5 ADMISSION VOUCHER TICKETS all those I left behind to finish most comprehensively devoid of Felix last week, even if they human sensitivity that I have FOR ANY WEEKDAY SCREENING BEFORE phoned at 3.30am to tell me that ever met. 1 7.00. the fuse needed to be changed in So there. TO WIN THESE TICKETS ALL YOU HAVE TO the collating machine plug.

DO IS TO COME TO THE FELIX OFFICE, EDITORIAL TEAM: TODAY AT 2PM. SIMPLE. NEWS: ALEX FEAKES FEATURES: MARK BAKER fii: JEREMY MUSIC: VIK BANSAL FILM: WEI LEE PHOTOGRAPHY: DIANA HARRISON & WILLIAM LORENZ SPORT: JONATHAN TROUT SCIENCE: BEN WILKINS PUZZLES: TIM ST.CLAIR COLLATING LAST WEEK: PRACTICALLY EVERYONE, IT SEEMS.

DELIVERING (WHEN I WAS HUNG OVER): WEI LEE

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1 2 3 5 Crossword by Clansman shows character (4) Across: 29. Cat takes short hellish break in I. Terrain without land,and a moun- villa (6) tainous beast made to look responsi- 31. Cobra takes in vermin? (3) ble! (9) 32. Top card is almost right for acid! 5. Wolf-pack leader emerges from a (6) lake (5) 33. Connect adjective to other inter- i5 8. Ginola testimonial contains most esting nouns first (6) recent development (6) 34. Boat using net badly settles down 10. Too funny to have independant (5) second enquiry first, when it has no 35. Chats about Oriental tie might relevance (6) relate to beauty (9) II. Song for an ordinary differential equation (3) Down: 12. Place with no maid is chaotic (6) 1. Peculiar heroes are full of sub- 55 14. Spotty cane (4) stance (5) 15. On Wednesday, thick backward 2. Two states of gold in disrepair after boy is seven days late! (7) a fall (6) 16. Has irational fear of the master 3. Pull up inside digester (3) (3) 4. Residue is not up to politician! (7) 5. Charge at peculiar feline king (6) 20. Decide, in recent times, to con- 6. Wears down sex god with bad 14. Chocolate pen has to breathe! (7) logical base and entertain Kurdish fuse jug with short editor (7) press officer! (6) 17. Untrue alternative staff just sympathisers first and foremost! (6) 21. I hear parrot bug is legally right! 7. First two arguers say "Yes - it does- before sunrise 25. This European Community - ter- (7) n't roll down Uluru!" (5, 4) 18. Drink a short tea? (3) rible morals! (6) 23. Man eats dish, perhaps, of con- 9. Staying afloat without Flash's 19. Greek pastry, perhaps? (3) 26. Nosy country (4) secutive letters (3) enemy (4) 27. No cricketers left in (3, 3) 25. Rice rate goes down by a fifth, 22. Toss it after mother turns weird 13. Old horse gives a song about a 30. Drink it on ice or with gin? (5) awkwardly... (7) (A waterfall (7) 33. Worker in a tantrum! (3) 28. ...while maize tax in Greece 24. Former Russians form united zoo-

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Salomon Brothers SPORT FEATURE FELIX FRIDAY 3RD NOVEMBER 1995 . TWENTY-SEVEN No messing about on the river at the 1995 Henley Royal Regatta Late last June,the I.C. Boat Club of the previous Club Captain, go on though to represent the Imperial boys sped up the put the victories of the preceed- Tom Miller and 1994 winner Imperial in Canada as part of an course leaving the Cambridge ing months behind them and John Moore on board, the crew Alumnus weekend where they Squad with no answer to finish in focused their attention towards sucessfully qualified for the next performed well. a whipping 6 min 06 sec, taking a the 1995 Henley Royal Regatta day's race against Kingston I.C. colours were also well full three seconds off the previ- and Woman's Henley. Grammar School. One of the represented as a Queen's Tower ous record. A difficult win over a The woman's crew entered good Notts County crew meant a the College Eights event with the final against the undefeated confidence of being UAU University of Washington Junior Champions by a considerable Varsity. The race was won within margin. This confidence was not the first minute and Imperial misplaced in the initial rounds in hammered the point home in which they destroyed the Oxford style to win by nearly four college crews of St.John's and lengths to gain the club its fifth Wolfson. However the major Henley event in four years. threat and eventual defeat cae ANY STUDENTS INTERESTED IN from across the Atlantic. The JOINING I.C.B.C. SHOULD CON- mammoth Wisconsin University TACT THE CAPTAIN, ANDY Eight was just too fast, in a time CREW IN PICTURE FROM LEFT TO RIGHT; P.WILSON, A.WARNOCK, KERSHAW THROUGH THE UNION ten seconds quicker than the win- L.ATRILL, S. DENNIS, R.LUCAS, J.BOTTERILL, T.GALE, A.KERSHAW, PIGEON HOLES. ners of the next event up. J.GOODWIN (cox). In the college fours event, best school crews this year, they coxless pair, racing in the Silver after coming through to beat proved themselves slightly too Goblets. This boat was stoked by Edinburgh from being a length much for the recently formed Martin Kettle, now an I.C. alum- behind at halfway, the women I.C. eight , who soon found the ni and a previous twice winner at did not have the strength in other attractions that the regatta Henley. He and his partner Dave reserve to overhaul a strong has to offer. Gillard, formerly of Cambridge, Exeter challenge. In club fours, The "Visitors" four, altered were clearly in the top two pairs the Imperial crew met the even- the previous week and containing at the regatta. However, when tual winners in the first round one oarsman who was also com- you come up against Redgrave and pushed them closer than and Pinsent, presently four any other team. times world champions and world record holders, even an At the Henley Royal However, when you STARTING NEXT WEEK, THIS SPOT WILL BE I.C. rower could be forgiven Regatta I.C.'s men again GIVEN OVER TO A NEW COMPETITION; for losing. Dave and Martin fronted strong entries in come up against THE I.C.LEAGUE. were knocked out in the many events, and spirted per- QUITE SIMPLY THIS WILL BE THE DEFINI- semi-finals, where the formances were seen in theRedgrav e and Pinsent, TIVE GUIDE TO THE FORM OF ALL OUR Leander pair slashed thirteen hotly contested Brittania, REPRESENTATIVE TEAMS. IT WILL OPERATE seconds off their own course Visitor's, and Temple presently four times ON A THREE POINTS FOR A WIN, ONE record. Challenge Cups. However, POINT FOR A DRAW, NO POINTS FOR A most of the attention was world champions and The "bumped-up" College DEFEAT, AND MINUS ONE POINT FOR centred on the controverial First eight looked to have a THOSE WHO CANNOT BOTHER THEM- "bumping-up" of the College world record holders, tough job on their hands in SELVES TO TELL THE SPORTS DESK OF first eight from the "Temple" the higher event, with many THEIR RESULTS. to the more prestigious even an I.C. rower American entries and some of WITH ANY LUCK WE'LL BE ABLE TO CON Thames Challenge for Club the faster British crews, SOMEONE INTO PROVIDING A TROPHY Eights. could be forgiven for including the Goldie eight FOR THE EVENTUAL WINNERS, AT WORST The Temple eight was from Cambridge, who had WE CAN ALL HAVE A GOOD LAUGH AT made up of two previous losing. made only one change since THE LOSERS. Henley winners and mem- the Boat Race. After a confi- IF YOU WANT TO ENTER YOUR bers of the development squad. dent procession to Saturday they TEAM, GET YOUR CAPTAIN TO SEND They started their campaign with peting in the Temple eight were drew the favorites, Goldie. In a A REPRESENTATIVE TO FELIX BEFORE a slightly shaky performance always going to have a difficult race which was described by one YOUR NEXT MATCH. against.an American college crew time and found themselves international reporter as "the but with the steadying influence slightly off the pace, the four did most impressive row of the day" TWENTY-EIGHT . FELIX FRIDAY NOVEMBER 3RD 1 995 SPORT

Felix Sport Edited by Jonathan Trout FIVE GOAL Due to a DISASTROUS Rugby ROUT BOOST stunning lack HOCKEY SHOWING IC'S TROPHY of material, DOES NOT DAMPEN teams CHANCES SPIRTS Miners (even though it obviously Goals from Mark involved in should have done) finally stop Ferguson (2), Richard Here, printed in full, is the Craig, Amoafo Anim- back page men's captain's stunningly Addo, and a splendid indi- precise account of the rot Wednesday's play. vidual effort by Mike shock Wednesday afternoon and the Hockey vs. QMW Jarvis maintained the first The RSM First team enjoyed I.C. bandwagon was put firmly team's promiding start to their opening win of the season Men 1st XI: 5-1. What can you back on the road with a 18-6 the season, and were just over local rivals St. Mary's say? Ginga scored three -for first team win over the previous- rewards for I.C.'s thanks to superb efforts from them! Although Imperial scored ly undefeated Q.M.W. Tries by "Brazilian like" football. Hamish "The Silky Scotsman" the best of the six! Lightwieght Matt Toolan, Simon Hall and Maclntyre and the underrated With two wins out of two roofed a cracking cross from the Eric Cantona of Imperial Simon Hiscocks(I wonder who in BUS A to date hopes are "Son of Satan". Quality not rugby Jean-Phillipe Oesterle wrote this?-Ed.). It seems that Quantity!! high that our men could the RSM lst's are getting their ensured that a gritty and much progress well in the tour- act together, which is more than 2nd XI: Good. Draw -robbed improved pack performance was nament this year. can be said for the second XI. though- Mike scored a cracker - duly rewarded. On Saturday, I.C.'s IVth XI Despite last week's 9-0 destruc- FLIPPED it in!! 'Nuff. Winners Men of the match were the took a first half lead against tion of the Royal Vets, (all races). "rampaging" John Cassidy and Q.M.W. through an Ian Archer Wednesday's 3-2 defeat at the Ladies 1st XI: Captain played a the "mercurial" Simon Fuller header. The result was never in hands of UMDS was a dire superb game - shouted, smoked (Who really uses these adjec- spectacle, and it is the general any real doubt, and second-half and drank. 2-0 lead. Lost 3-2. tives? -Ed), whose huge pres- opinion that the second half was goals from Morgan, Demitrios Beer Monsta did not MONSTA! ence capped the best team one to be forgotten, despite the Captain loves Rimmer!! and a Gazza brace sealed a solid obvious bitterness over the ref- effort of the previously dreadful 2nd XI: Grass-Nuff. Angieeee - all round performance. eree's more dubious decisions. start to the season. blinding - good boat race. 1 sts Our second string unfortu- beaten hands down. (Quite..) nately did not fare as well, and an abysmal start led to a 38 FOOTBALL HOCKEY point half time deficit. However MEN'S MEN'S Sports News the captain harangued the team during the break, and a score 1 ST XI 1 - 5 QMW Newcastle United clung to the top of each from John Evans and James RSM i 2 - 1 ST.MARY'S the Premiership after an immensely Weekes, from superbly execut- entertaining 1-1 draw with struggling ed forward play restored pride 2ND XI 1 - 1 QMW Spurs. United always had the upper hand to the Imperial ranks. "The final RSM ii 2 - 0 UMDS and were full of attacking flair, but score (10-52) did not really Tottenham always looked as if they might reflect the performance," said WOMEN'S score on the break. one player. RSM II 9 - 0 ROYAL VETS Finally, we come to the 1 ST XI 2 - 3 QMW Australia won the Halifax nailbiting win enjoyed by the Centenary Rugby League Cup Final on 3rd team. In spite of going Saturday by emphaticaly beating down to two pushover tries RUGBY 2ND XI 1 - 3 QMW England 16-8 at Wembley." When you QMW did not give up, but were MEN'S make as many errors and concede as spurred to greater efforts, and many penalties as we did you are com- two tries brought them perilous- \ 1 ST xv 18 - 6 QMW Please could all teams present mitting suicide" said the England coach ly close to I.C.'s lead. In the end their results to the sports desk Phil Larder. only a missed conversion seper- | 2ND xv 10 - 52 QMW before 9pm on wed for inclu- ated the sides in this hugely sion in the results column England Rugby Union selectors this enter taining contest. } 3RD xv 14 - 12 QMW (Sports Ed) week announced their continuing support of Will Carling's captaincy.