Help out AIDS Action Baltimore

December 8, 2017 | Volume XV, Issue 16 Help Out AIDS Action Baltimore Dear Friends: The amount of work of people living with HIV AIDS Action Baltimore (AAB) has been we accomplish and the A letter from in Maryland were undiag- providing essential services to people with effect we have had on AIDS Action nosed. HIV/AIDS since 1987. Thanks to your gen- the war against HIV AAB has been instru- erosity, we’re still standing after a long hard with only four full-time Baltimore to our mental again this year in financial battle. We know only too well that and one part-time em- the effort to reduce HIV times are still tough, but as we commem- ployees is truly amaz- community infections in Baltimore. orate our 30th year of service, we hope we ing! We are currently admin- can count on your continued support which Although HIV disease is becoming a istering three HIV prevention will help us maintain our many HIV/AIDS pro- chronic manageable disease, here is why we programs, one for transgender grams. We still desperately need your help to still need your help now more than ever: women and two for gay men. keep our doors open and continue to provide In the latest Centers for Disease Control AAB’s Project TEA Time is an our many essential services to the Baltimore (CDC) data reported in 2016, Maryland was HIV prevention program for HIV/AIDS community. We hope you will re- ranked fifth among US states in adult/ado- transgender women that pro- member us and continue your loyal support. lescent HIV diagnosis rates and third in AIDS motes HIV testing and helps Please help us in any way you can. Your do- diagnosis rates in 2015. The Baltimore-Co- people get linked to care and nations will enable us to continue our marvel- lumbia-Towson area had the tenth highest treatment. All our prevention ous record of benevolence and compassion estimated HIV diagnosis rate of any metro- programs provide HIV preven- with only a rate of 2.8% overhead in 2016. politan area. The CDC estimated that 15.3% —continued on page 3

clearly going to nail it, because I get up and do comedy on stage without it always Lisa Lampanelli Takes CenterStage by Storm being planned. I’m not going to call anyone a cunt unless it’s written in the script! By Frankie Kujawa ciously pointed, this “theater entertain- Queen of Mean,” Lampan- FK: Have you been to Balti- White Rabbit / Red Rabbit has been called ment meets social experiment” is unlike elli chatted with Baltimore ‘The first group more before? a play, but it’s a lively, global sensation anything, and will make you question ev- OUTloud to discuss her that really got LL: Yes, many times. I’ve played that no-one is allowed to talk about. Slyly erything. Running from De- upcoming performance the Meyerhoff Symphony Hall be- humorous and auda- cember 12th to 23rd, the and what Baltimore can my comedy fore. That’s a very classy place, and performance has cast an expect her not do while as you know, I’m very classy myself. array of local and nation- she’s in town. were gay men. Baltimore is in for Lisa Lampanelli al talent and celebrities Frankie Kujawa: The lesbians, doing my impression of a classy to perform the curiosity What can audiences ex- bitch. I’m coming down and expect live for the first time each pect from your perfor- they took a that theatre to take me out to dinner night. mance of White Rabbit / little longer, but and a fabulous breakfast. I’m not Lisa Lampanelli, the Red Rabbit? just some Off-Broadway cheapie. I well-known comedian / Lisa Lampanelli: eventually came expect them to take me out for a few actress / playwright, will Well, I’m not only a come- around’ fabulous meals! perform for audiences dian, but I also love acting FK: You know, Baltimore on Tuesday, Decem- and playwriting. Now, I’ll has been known to have some ber 19th. Heralded as tell you that I know nothing about this play. good-looking guys around town. “Comedy’s Loveable Other than I’ve heard about the legendari- LL: Well, you might not know this, but ness of it, and that you can’t read it I’ve been celibate for almost the last five Lisa Lampanelli – Performs at years. I enjoy not having sex because what CenterStage December 19th in beforehand. You just read it and go! White Rabbit / Red Rabbit Why would I be worried, at all? I’m —continued on page 19 Chase Brexton & Co-Publishers Jim Becker • Jim Williams [email protected]

The LGBT Health Resource Center Believe Executive Editor Jim Becker gender-diverse children & their families [email protected] [email protected] should have a strong network & specialized care. Associate Editor & Director of Marketing & Production Mary Taylor [email protected]

Arts and Entertainment Editor Frankie Kujawa [email protected]

IN 2015 WE LAUNCHED Leather Editor Rodney Burger [email protected]

Contributing Writers for Baltimore OUTloud GENDER JOURNEYS OF YOUTH Ava Barron-Shasho • Janan Broadbent, Ph. D. Josh Buchbinder • Anthony Calo • Lee Carpenter AN INTEGRATED CARE PROGRAM FOR Jeffrey Clagett • Wayne Curtis • Woody Derricks Chuck Duncan • John Redmond-Palmer • Dr. Eva Hersh Mark S. King • Brother Merrick Moses Frankie Kujawa • Sage Piper • David Placher Mark Segal • Gregg Shapiro • Bill Redmond-Palmer GENDER-DIVERSE YOUTH David Egan • Elyse Buchbinder • Dr. Loren Olson Alex “Bear” Conley • Brynn Deveraux

LED BY NATIONALLY-RECOGNIZED Contributing Writers for OUT in the VALLEY Laura Anderson • Rev. Kelly Crenshaw Rev. Dr. Robert Apgar-Taylor • Brian George Hose PEDIATRIC ENDOCRINOLOGIST Elizabeth Thompson Contributing Writers OUT in Asbury Park, NJ Rai Guerra-Nelson • Christy Girlington

Graphics Ramon Montiel DR. ELYSE D. PINE Web Editor Anja Saine [email protected]

National Advertising Rep Rivendell Media 908-232-2021

Founders Jim Becker • Joe Berg • Mike Chase • Lee Mooney (1959-2007) • Jim Williams

Baltimore OUTloud PO Box 4887 Baltimore, MD 21211 410-802-1310 Baltimoreoutloud.com

Additional Information Honoring diversity. Baltimore OUTloud is published every other Friday by Pride Media, Ltd. in Baltimore, Maryland. Readers comments and unsolicited materials are welcomed and may be sent to: [email protected]. All materials appearing in this Inspiring wellness. newspaper are the property of Pride Media, Ltd. and may not be reproduced without the written permission of the editor. The opinions expressed in Baltimore OUTloud are solely Improving our communities. those of the writers unless otherwise indicated and do not necessarily reflect the views of Pride Media, Ltd., and the staff.

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Pediatrics2 t BALTIMORE OU TLOforUD DECEmb her.er 8, 2017 Primary • baltimoreoutloud.c careom for you. All in one location. news // LOCAL

to include the HIV affected community in all selves. Thanks to the many of you who at- Help Out AIDS Action Baltimore aspects of research and development. AAB tended our fabulous Tea at Cedarcroft event is also a leading member of the national Fair at the home of Neal Naff and Nate Hubler —continued from page 1 we can continue the fight to save our com- Pricing Coalition (FPC), pressuring“big phar- which raised over $35,000. For more infor- tion education. Our PrEP UP program pro- munity from the devastation of HIV disease. ma”to price HIV and HCV drugs reasonably, mation on our events and the latest in HIV motes PrEP (pre-exposure prophylaxis) use AAB has worked again this year to advocate limit price increases, cap ongoing drug pric- treatment and research as well as PrEP for in gay men and transgender women. PrEP is for federal budget increases to NIH research es for government programs like AIDS Drug HIV prevention or financial assistance and a one pill once a day prevention regimen that funding and continued funding for the Ryan Assistance Programs and to initiate co-pay prescription drug access program informa- has proven to be 90% effective in reducing White Care Act for the care and support of programs for patients with private insurance. tion, please check out our web site at Aidsac- HIV transmission risk. So far, our PrEP out- people with HIV. We are also still working with We have convinced every HIV and Hepatitis tionbaltimore.org. reach, education, and testing efforts have national advocates to ensure that all classes C (HCV) drug company to create programs Please help us to continue our emergen- been extremely successful. We also recent- of antiviral HIV drugs will be included on new that will cover all the outrageously expensive cy financial assistance programs and our vi- ly initiated a new HIV prevention program Obama Care Act drug formularies. HIV policy co-pays and other out of pocket (OOP) costs tal local and national research and treatment for black gay men called New Horizons. The gets more complicated all the time, and it is for people with private insurance. Every HIV advocacy. We greatly appreciate your contin- CDC tells us that black gay men have a one- much harder every year for us to obtain the and HCV drug company now covers all OOP ued support in these tough economic times. in-two chance of be- money we need to prescription costs like deductibles, co-pays Thank you in advance for your contribution coming HIV infected “The CDC tells us that fight the epidemic. and co-insurance expenses. Our work direct- and for your past generosity. We know you in their lifetimes. Our black gay men have a Our work affects ly affects Marylanders with ever increasing are called on to make many charitable dona- new program seeks all who are touched OOP prescription costs. We are also working tions. We very much appreciate your contin- to educate black gay one-in-two chance of by HIV/AIDS. Eventu- very hard to ensure that people in Maryland ued confidence in our work. Your donation will men about this exor- ally many people with and across the country who cannot afford help us to save lives. We are forever grateful bitant risk and to help becoming HIV infected HIV/AIDS will need their medications get their drugs for free from for your trust and loyal support. Remember, them build networks of in their lifetimes. Our new drug cocktails “big pharma” through Patient Assistance Pro- now more than ever, without people like you, support to combat the when their old drugs grams (PAPs). Our work is way ahead of the there would be no AIDS Action Baltimore. t many obstacles they new program seeks to are no longer working curve. This type of advocacy does not hap- Lynda Dee & the AIDS Action Baltimore encounter which con- or because they are pen in any other disease community. The board: Merle McCann, M.D. (chair), Michael tribute to their risk of educate black gay men causing life-threaten- FPC has also taken a national lead in helping Aquino, Greg Baranoski, Jake Boone III, Ken- becoming HIV infect- about this exorbitant ing side effects. AAB to reduce drug prices nationally by working ny Eggerl, Thomas Holden, Mark McMullen, ed. We are very ex- continues to work with the US House and Senate. Ricki Rutley, Cameron Wolf, Ph.D., M.P.H. cited about these new risk and to help them on government and We are still doing our best to help our- programs and look for- industry Community ward to great results build networks of Advisory Boards. We and partnerships in support.” are working with in- 2017 and 2018. dustry to continually We have also taken a leadership role in change the standard of care by ensuring that promoting PrEP for HIV prevention and test- their new drug pipelines remain robust, and ing in gay men and transgender people with by replacing more older toxic drugs with more the initiation of our new PrEP UP and New effective, better tolerated drugs and new long Horizons programs. We are educating peo- acting drugs that will not require daily dosing. ple about PrEP as well as the latest in HIV We are very excited that scientists have treatment, linking them to PrEP and care pro- begun to work on HIV “cure” research. AAB is viders and helping them to stay on their med- working with government and industry and the ication. We are very excited about these new national HIV community to make a “cure” for monthly support and education programs and HIV or what we are now calling “HIV Remis- hope they will eventually help to decrease the sion” a reality. Even though this will take years Boosting empowerment and breaking the bonds number of people who become HIV infected to come to fruition, we have to start some- or stop taking their medication. where. AAB is a member of the Martin Del- of homophobia, racism, and stigma in same AAB continues to provide financial assis- aney Cure Research Collaboratories (DARE) gender-loving (SGL) men in Baltimore City tance to many needy people with HIV/AIDS. and amfAR Community Advisory Boards. AAB has provided this support to over 8,000 AAB is also working with DARE researchers • NETWORKING people since 1987 with over $2,933,000 in to bring additional resources to Baltimore for Every 1st Wednesday assistance and direct programs to people local cure research projects. We held an HIV • HIV EDUCATION with HIV/AIDS and their families in our com- Cure Research Forum on October 25th, 2017 munity for items such as rent and utilities. in conjunction with the DARE CAB. Dr. Robert Every Last Wednesday We firmly believe we must continue our in- Siliciano, an imminent researcher in the HIV • SOCIAL EVENTS valuable financial assistance programs which cure field from Johns Hopkins, gave an excel- Monthly provide a safety net to people with HIV/AIDS lent presentation, updating the current state experiencing an emergency financial crisis. of HIV Cure Research. • ART CREATION PROJECT Federal money is steadily decreasing AAB has been instrumental in the forma- while the rate of HIV cases in Baltimore is still tion of the Drug Development Committee of [email protected] • 410-837-5573 raging. Because federal dollars are shrinking, the AIDS Treatment Activists Coalition, a na- FB: New Horizons Baltimore • aidsactionbaltimore.org and who knows what new budget cuts we will tional organization that interacts with the phar- HIV Prevention Advocacy for SGL Men's Health supported by experience from the Trump Administration, maceutical industry, pressuring companies to we need your help more than ever so that study drugs expeditiously and ethically and ViiV Healthcare's ACCELERATE! Program

BALTIMORE OUTLOUD DECEmber 8, 2017 • baltimoreoutloud.com t 3

Select Chase Brexton Health Care patients deemed most in need may be eligible for digital breast cancer screenings through a mobile mammography van to be located at the Chase Brexton Mount Vernon Center on September 28th. The screenings are provided in partnership with Lackawan- na Mobile X-Ray and the Susan G. Komen Foundation. Breast cancer is the second most common cancer in women, and mammograms are capable of finding it up to three years before it can be felt. The Center for Disease Control recommends mammograms every two years for women age 50 and older who are at average risk for breast cancer. The staff of Chase Brexton encour- ages their patients to remember that early detection saves lives! Any patient who feels they may quality should contact their Chase Brexton provider or call 410-837- 2050 for more info. t news // LOCAL

“Same Gender Love boutique has Baltimore Love, a local LGBT-run group something for everyone,” says owner (and supporting the homeless. Tickets are $5. If GLSEN to card creator) Marva Laws, “however our one hundred people commit to attending, PA High Court line of LGBT greeting cards were created B and Dee’s Baltimore Love founder Brian to meet the need for understanding, ac- Dolbow will appear in drag! For more info, OKs Ouster of Protest Betsy visit Bit.ly/2im4Qau. Holiday Party for the Homeless – A holiday party for the homeless happens Lesbian Judge DeVos on December 16th, from 11 am to 5 pm, sponsored by the First Unitarian Church Harrisburg – In a five-to-one decision issued The Trump administration’s Secretary of of Baltimore (with over 20 other support- November 22nd, the Pennsylvania Supreme Education, Betsy DeVos, main education ing groups) in the church’s parish hall (514 Court upheld a lower court’s ruling that per- experience is in the political and financial North Charles Street, Baltimore). There’s manently bars Dawn A. Segal from hold- support for charter schools, and as an own- ceptance, support and open-mindedness a free community dinner, gifts for children ing judicial office. Segal, an open lesbian, er of a firm that pursues people in default for LGBT individuals – and those that love and youth, winter clothing, live music, and served as a municipal-court judge in Phila- on their student loans. Some have praised them.” more. It will be a safe and sober, fami- delphia for about six years until she was sus- her rollback of Obama-era regulations that “The passion and vision behind my ly-friendly event, welcoming all. More info pended without pay last year due to improp- stripped young men accused of unwanted writing stems from real thoughts and emo- at Bit.ly/2iOMpix. Donate funds here: Go- er conversations with another judge. The tions, with the hopes the cards might ig- fundme.com/holiday-party-for-the-home- majority opinion states that Segal’s actions nite difficult conversations that people may less-2017, or send checks to Alisia Moore, were “an affront to want or need to have.” Many of the cards Treasurer, 4132 East Joppa Road, Suite the administration of are light-hearted and designed for anyone 110-854, Nottingham, Maryland 21236. If justice and diminish regardless of sexual orientation, but my in- more questions, call Bonnie “Raven” Lane confidence in the ju- tent with the LGBT line is to fill the current at 443-494-9569 or fightinjustice247@ diciary at large.” The hole in today’s world about what might be gmail.com. sole dissenter rec- considered complex subject matter, open- Lunch Patrol: Christmas Time in the ommended that the ing up a possibility to being better under- City – On December 17th, join B & Dee’s case be remanded to stood.” Baltimore Love for their special holiday the Court of Judicial The store also offers LGBT-branded edition of Lunch Patrol. Discipline for further apparel, along with Tervis tumblers, wine They will distribute brown-bag lunches review to ensure con- Trump Education Secretary Betsy DeVos and shot glasses, koozies, flasks, dog to area homeless, a staple of Lunch Patrol, sistent discipline for and will also be offering an Italian dinner problematic judges. leashes and bowls, umbrellas, and statio- Dawn A. Segal nery buffet for those in need. They will meet at In court papers, sex of any presumption of innocence in “LGBT consumers want more inclu- 620 Fallsway in Baltimore. Donations and Segal acknowledged university tribunals. Others have criticized sion, relating to and identifying with all volunteers are needed. All are welcome. engaging in improper conversations with her for the same. On the LGBT front, De- love,” says Laws. “We want cards that cel- For info and signup details, stay tuned to Municipal Court Judge Joseph C. Waters Vos rescinded directives that recommend- ebrate and address who we are, who we Bit.ly/2ByNoqP. Jr. between 2011-12 but said none of the ed students have access to facilities based love, how we feel and to whom we want Cookies and Cocoa for the Homeless conversations influenced her judicial rulings. on their asserted gender identities. and need to express our thoughts, feelings – On December 24th, from 6 to 9 pm, vol- Last year, the Court of Judicial Discipline In response to Secretary DeVos visit- and truths.” unteers are invited to meet at the intersec- ordered Segal’s permanent removal, after ing the University of Baltimore to to give Same Gender Love is located at 1915 tion of Guilford Avenue and the 300 block holding a sanctions hearing, during which a commencement address on December Towne Centre Boulevard, suite 115, An- of North Pleasant Street, under the Jones Segal gave an impassioned plea for her re- 18th, GLSEN Maryland is organizing a napolis, at the Annapolis Towne Centre at Falls Expressway, to distribute fresh-baked turn to the bench. In May, oral arguments protest to be held outside the Modell Lyric Parole. Look online at Samegenderlove. cookies and hot cocoa to homeless people were held in Harrisburg before the state (140 West Mount Royal, Baltimore) from com. t living in downtown Baltimore. Supreme Court. The arguments focused noon to 3 pm. For more info, visit Bit.ly/2B- They also hope to distribute care bags on whether the Court of Judicial Discipline zlE5i. The hastag for the event on social with bottled water, granola bars, a hat, was consistent in its approach to disciplining media is #TossDeVosBmore. t socks, and gloves, to help those often for- problematic judges. gotten with the gift of love and something Segal argued that many Pennsylvania Supporting to warm their bellies on a cold winter’s judges engaged in more egregious behav- night. ior than hers yet only received reprimands Donations are being collected of the or brief suspensions. However, the state LGBT Boutique the Homeless for above, as well as fruit cups, Christmas Supreme Court ultimately rejected that ar- cards, chips, and sodas. To make a dona- gument, emphasizing the gravity of Segal’s tion or for more info, it’s Facebook.com/ misconduct. The FBI wiretapped Segal’s Comes to the Holidays events/1956367667953104. t conversations with Waters as part of a larger investigation of judicial corruption in Phila- delphia. Waters was convicted of fraud and Annapolis Several upcoming events support those spent almost two years in federal prison. He experiencing homelessness this holiday was released in November 2016, accord- Will a LGBT-focused boutique that wears season. Won’t you come out and help? ing to prison records. Segal isn’t accused of its sexuality on its sleeve thrive in an up- Drag Me to X-mas is set for Decem- any criminal wrongdoing. Neither side had a market shopping center in Annapolis? ber 10th from 9 pm to 1 am at Ziascoz comment for this story. t (Philadelphia Gay Time will tell, as Same Gender Love only Bar and Lounge (1313 East Pratt Street, News – Tim Cwiek at Epgn.com) opened for business on December 2nd. Baltimore). It’s a fundraiser for B & Dee’s 4 t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD DECEmber 8, 2017 • baltimoreoutloud.com beyond the beltway

compiled by Jim Becker important “acknowledgement of LGBTQ and think that the people being described identities and LGBTQ lives,” but, she add- as victims are simply disappointed. In the Canadian PM ed, “there is still a lot of work to be done in whole history of rock ‘n’ roll there’ve been terms of the systemic changes... We have musicians who’ve slept with groupies. If apologizes huge amounts of work still do here in Can- you go through the history, almost every- ada. We have very high rates of LGBTQ one is guilty of sleeping with minors. Why to LGBT youth homelessness, housing is a big is- don’t we throw everyone in jail?” sue, unemployment, access to health care Morrissey said it was “laughable” that community for and we have a blood ban in effect for men Ridley Scott, in response to multiple alle- who have sex with men,” she explained. gations of abuse against Spacey, cut the wrongs Leaders of Canada’s main opposition par- actor out of his upcoming feature All The ties echoed Trudeau’s sentiments. (Seat- Money in the World, reshooting Spacey’s Ottawa, Canada – Canadian Prime tle Gay News – Mike Andrew at Sgn.org) scenes with Christopher Plummer. Speak- Minister Justin Trudeau apologized to his https://www.aol.com/article/entertaining directly to the allegations, made by Star country’s LGBT community in an emotion- ment/2017/11/20/morrissey-defends-kev- Trek: Discovery actor Anthony Rapp that al speech to parliament on November 28th. in-spacey-harvey-weinstein/23282958) Spacey tried to seduce him when Spacey The Chinese knew the rest of the world “Today, we offer a long overdue apology was 26 and Rapp was 14, Morrissey said, was going to figure out about the inhuman to all those whom we, the Government of “You have to ask, where were the boy’s treatments to literally shock the gay out of parents? You ask yourself, if the boy didn’t you; and so, back in 2015, the government British singer know what could happen. I don’t know approved a research team at Zhejiang Uni- what it was like for him but in my youth I versity in Hangzhou to study the effects Morrissey was never in a situation like that. Never. It of spraying oxytocin up the noses of ho- was always clear to me what could happen. mosexual men to see how it affects their skeptical of sex If you’re in someone’s bedroom, you have sexual orientation. Oxytocin has been best to know where it could lead. That’s why I known for its roles in the female repro- assault claims don’t find the whole thing very believable. duction system. Recently, scientists have It seems to me Spacey has been unneces- been investigating oxytocin’s role in var- Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau Berlin – As reported by Yahoo news, sarily attacked.” Morrissey made a similar ious behaviors including, orgasm, social says he’s sorry Morrissey, the British singer and former argument in regards to Weinstein and the recognition, bonding, and maternal behav- The Smiths frontman, has become as well- women who have come forward accusing iors. The article says it’s also known as the Canada, wronged,” the prime minister said. known for his public outbursts and politi- the producer. For the record, Morrissey “love hormone” or the “cuddle hormone” “We are sorry. We hope by acknowledging cally incorrect musings as for the languid said he had “never, never, never” been because levels of oxytocin are increased If you like to write and have an interest our failings we can make the crucial prog- melodies and acerbic lyrics that made him in a similar situation, either as abuser during hugs and orgasms. in local news, theater and the arts, food, ress LGBTQ people in Canada deserve. a pop music icon. So it was only a mat- or abused, in his life or career. (Aol.com The results should be out by the end LGBTQ history, doing interviews, We will continue to support each other in ter of time before Morrissey stepped into at https://www.aol.com/article/entertain- of December. The study states the objec- Baltimore OUTloud might be the place our fight for equality because we know that the #MeToo debate to give his take on the ment/2017/11/20/morrissey-defends-kev- tive of the trial: “the feature of brain activity Canada gets stronger every single day harassment scandals, and outraged back- in-spacey-harvey-weinstein/23282958) and social gender cognition in male homo- for you. that we choose to embrace diversity.” lash against it, that have been thrashing sexuals, and how oxytocin affects them.” Trudeau’s official apology included through Hollywood since the first allega- Twenty volunteers were chosen at random. We are looking for writers to share with “state-sponsored, systemic oppression and tions emerged against movie mogul Har- Among other things, the volunteers had to their LGBTQ community. rejection” of LGBT Canadians, as well as vey Weinstein just over a month ago. Chinese be right-handed, aged 18-40, and have In Baltimore and surrounding areas the suppression of “two-spirit Indigenous In an interview with German maga- “complete male homosexuality.” Research- including Hagerstown, Frederick, values and beliefs” and “abusing the pow- researchers es then conducted a blind study with 20 Asbury Park NJ and Rehoboth Beach, er of the law, and making criminals of cit- test subjects who were divided into two and any area we reach. izens.” Trudeau’s government also intro- trying to spray groups. One group had oxytocin sprayed duced legislation to expunge the criminal up their nose while the others used a pla- For more information contact records of Canadians previously convict- the gay away cebo saline solution. Subjects are being ed of having consensual same-sex activ- measured on the Kinsey scale, the Klein Mary Taylor 410-802-1310, ity. Canada decriminalized homosexuality Hangzhou, China – Zero Hedge re- scale, through gender cognitive tests and or e-mail her at in 1969, but records of prior convictions ports that in mid-November, Human Rights functional magnetic resonance imaging of [email protected] still remain on the books. Trudeau also Watch (HRW) issued a report detailing the brain, and by testing their blood pres- she can fill you in with all the details. announced that an agreement had been China’s gay conversion problem. Power- sure. At the very least, it seems likely that reached in a class-action lawsuit for $110 ful first-hand accounts expose how state- one group of men had a much better time Hope to see you in the paper! million Canadian ($85.80 million US) to be Morrissey has his doubts owned hospitals are using electric-shock these last few years than the other group. paid out to former civil servants and mem- machines and medication to convert gays A 2013 study found that taking oxytocin be- bers of the military who lost their jobs be- zine Der Spiegel, published last month, back to some form of “normalcy.” The fore lovemaking makes for a much more cause of their sexual orientation. A ban on Morrissey defended Weinstein and others, practice is an open secret in China, where intense orgasm and feeling of satisfaction, lesbian and gay military service persisted including Kevin Spacey, who have been a majority of gays are forced by their fam- particularly for men. (Zero Hedge – Tyler until 1992. accused of sexual misconduct. “I hate ilies into hospitals, because the culture Durden at Zerohedge.com/news/2017-12- Egale Canada Human Rights Trust rape, I hate assault, I hate people being labels it as a curable-disease. Even the 01/chinese-researchers-experiment-an- executive director Helen Kennedy said forced into a sexual situation,” the maga- World Psychiatric Association has come ti-gay-spray) the apology has “been a long time com- zine quoted Morrissey as saying. “But in out denouncing the practice as “unethical, ing.” Kennedy said the apology was an quite a few cases, you look at the situation unscientific, and harmful”. —continued on page 9

BALTIMORE OUTLOUD DECEmber 8, 2017 • baltimoreoutloud.com t 5 WHAT IS GENVOYA®? GENVOYA is a 1-pill, once-a-day prescription medicine used • Kidney problems, including kidney failure. Your healthcare to treat HIV-1 in people 12 years and older who weigh at least provider should do blood and urine tests to check your kidneys. 77 pounds. It can either be used in people who are starting If you develop new or worse kidney problems, they may tell you to HIV-1 treatment and have never taken HIV-1 medicines before, stop taking GENVOYA. or people who are replacing their current HIV-1 medicines • Too much lactic acid in your blood (lactic acidosis), which is a serious and whose healthcare provider determines they meet certain but rare medical emergency that can lead to death. Tell your healthcare requirements. These include having an undetectable viral load provider right away if you get these symptoms: weakness or being (less than 50 copies/mL) for 6 months or more on their current more tired than usual, unusual muscle pain, being short of breath or fast HIV-1 treatment. GENVOYA combines 4 medicines into 1 pill breathing, stomach pain with nausea and vomiting, cold or blue hands taken once a day with food. GENVOYA is a complete HIV-1 and feet, feel dizzy or lightheaded, or a fast or abnormal heartbeat. treatment and should not be used with other HIV-1 medicines. • Severe liver problems, which in rare cases can lead to death. Tell GENVOYA does not cure HIV-1 or AIDS. To control HIV-1 your healthcare provider right away if you get these symptoms: skin infection and decrease HIV-related illnesses, you must keep or the white part of your eyes turns yellow, dark “tea-colored” urine, taking GENVOYA. Ask your healthcare provider if you have light-colored stools, loss of appetite for several days or longer, nausea, questions about how to reduce the risk of passing HIV-1 to or stomach-area pain. others. Always practice safer sex and use condoms to lower the The most common side effect of GENVOYA is nausea. Tell your chance of sexual contact with body fluids. Never reuse or share healthcare provider if you have any side effects that bother you or needles or other items that have body fluids on them. don’t go away. IMPORTANT SAFETY INFORMATION What should I tell my healthcare provider before taking GENVOYA? What is the most important information I should know about GENVOYA? • All your health problems. Be sure to tell your healthcare provider if you have or have had any kidney or liver problems, GENVOYA may cause serious side effects: including hepatitis virus infection. • Worsening of hepatitis B (HBV) infection. GENVOYA is not approved to treat HBV. If you have both HIV-1 and HBV and • All the medicines you take, including prescription and stop taking GENVOYA, your HBV may suddenly get worse. over-the-counter medicines, vitamins, and herbal supplements. Do not stop taking GENVOYA without first talking to your Other medicines may affect how GENVOYA works. Keep a list healthcare provider, as they will need to monitor your health. of all your medicines and show it to your healthcare provider and pharmacist. Ask your healthcare provider if it is safe to take Who should not take GENVOYA? GENVOYA with all of your other medicines. Do not take GENVOYA if you take: • If you take antacids. Take antacids at least 2 hours before or • Certain prescription medicines for other conditions. It is after you take GENVOYA. important to ask your healthcare provider or pharmacist about • If you are pregnant or plan to become pregnant. It is not known medicines that should not be taken with GENVOYA. Do not if GENVOYA can harm your unborn baby. Tell your healthcare start a new medicine without telling your healthcare provider. provider if you become pregnant while taking GENVOYA. • The herbal supplement St. John’s wort. • If you are breastfeeding (nursing) or plan to breastfeed. Do • Any other medicines to treat HIV-1 infection. not breastfeed. HIV-1 can be passed to the baby in breast milk. What are the other possible side effects of GENVOYA? You are encouraged to report negative side effects of Serious side effects of GENVOYA may also include: prescription drugs to the FDA. Visit www.fda.gov/medwatch, or call 1-800-FDA-1088. • Changes in your immune system. Your immune system may get stronger and begin to fight infections. Tell your healthcare provider Please see Important Facts about GENVOYA, including if you have any new symptoms after you start taking GENVOYA. important warnings, on the following page.

Ask your healthcare provider if GENVOYA is right for you.

GENVOYA.com

6 t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD DECEmber 8, 2017 • baltimoreoutloud.com GENC0177_B_9-875x9-6_BaltimoreOUTloud_Skylar_r1v1jl.indd 1 12/4/17 9:54 AM GENVOYA does not cure HIV-1 or AIDS.

SHOW YOUR

POWERTake care of what matters most—you. GENVOYA is a 1-pill, once-a-day complete HIV-1 treatment for people who are either new to treatment or people whose healthcare provider determines they can replace their current HIV-1 medicines with GENVOYA.

BALTIMORE OUTLOUD DECEmber 8, 2017 • baltimoreoutloud.com t 7 GENC0177_B_9-875x9-6_BaltimoreOUTloud_Skylar_r1v1jl.indd 2 12/4/17 9:54 AM IMPORTANT FACTS This is only a brief summary of important information about GENVOYA® and does not replace talking to your healthcare provider about your condition and your treatment. (jen-VOY-uh)

MOST IMPORTANT INFORMATION ABOUT GENVOYA POSSIBLE SIDE EFFECTS OF GENVOYA

GENVOYA may cause serious side effects, including: GENVOYA can cause serious side effects, including: • Worsening of hepatitis B (HBV) infection. GENVOYA is not • Those in the “Most Important Information About GENVOYA” section. approved to treat HBV. If you have both HIV-1 and HBV, your HBV • Changes in your immune system. may suddenly get worse if you stop taking GENVOYA. Do not stop taking GENVOYA without first talking to your healthcare provider, as • New or worse kidney problems, including kidney failure. they will need to check your health regularly for several months. • Too much lactic acid in your blood (lactic acidosis), which is a serious but rare medical emergency that can lead to death. Tell your healthcare provider right away if you get these symptoms: ABOUT GENVOYA weakness or being more tired than usual, unusual muscle pain, being short of breath or fast breathing, stomach pain with nausea • GENVOYA is a prescription medicine used to treat HIV-1 in people and vomiting, cold or blue hands and feet, feel dizzy or lightheaded, 12 years of age and older who weigh at least 77 pounds and have or a fast or abnormal heartbeat. never taken HIV-1 medicines before. GENVOYA can also be used to replace current HIV-1 medicines for some people who have an • Severe liver problems, which in rare cases can lead to death. Tell undetectable viral load (less than 50 copies/mL of virus in their blood), your healthcare provider right away if you get these symptoms: skin and have been on the same HIV-1 medicines for at least 6 months or the white part of your eyes turns yellow, dark “tea-colored” urine, and have never failed HIV-1 treatment, and whose healthcare provider light-colored stools, loss of appetite for several days or longer, determines that they meet certain other requirements. nausea, or stomach-area pain. is nausea. • GENVOYA does not cure HIV-1 or AIDS. Ask your healthcare The most common side effect of GENVOYA provider about how to prevent passing HIV-1 to others. These are not all the possible side effects of GENVOYA. Tell your healthcare Do NOT take GENVOYA if you: provider right away if you have any new symptoms while taking GENVOYA. • Take a medicine that contains: alfuzosin (Uroxatral®), Your healthcare provider will need to do tests to monitor your carbamazepine (Carbatrol®, Carnexiv®, Epitol®, Equetro®, health before and during treatment with GENVOYA. Tegretol ®, Tegretol-XR®, Teril ®), cisapride (Propulsid®, Propulsid Quicksolv®), dihydroergotamine (D.H.E. 45®, Migranal®), ergotamine (Cafergot®, Migergot®, Ergostat®, Medihaler Ergotamine®, Wigraine®, BEFORE TAKING GENVOYA Wigrettes®), lovastatin (Altoprev®, Mevacor®), lurasidone (Latuda®), methylergonovine (Methergine®), midazolam (when taken by mouth), Tell your healthcare provider if you: phenobarbital (Luminal®), phenytoin (Dilantin®, Dilantin-125®, • Have or have had any kidney or liver problems, including Phenytek®), pimozide (Orap®), rifampin (Rifadin®, Rifamate®, hepatitis infection. ® ® Rifater , Rimactane ), sildenafil when used for lung problems • Have any other medical condition. (Revatio®), simvastatin (Vytorin®, Zocor®), or triazolam (Halcion®). • Are pregnant or plan to become pregnant. • Take the herbal supplement St. John’s wort. • Are breastfeeding (nursing) or plan to breastfeed. Do not • Take any other HIV-1 medicines at the same time. breastfeed if you have HIV-1 because of the risk of passing HIV-1 to your baby. Tell your healthcare provider about all the medicines you take: GET MORE INFORMATION • Keep a list that includes all prescription and over-the-counter medicines, vitamins, and herbal supplements, and show it to your • This is only a brief summary of important information about GENVOYA. healthcare provider and pharmacist. Talk to your healthcare provider or pharmacist to learn more. • Ask your healthcare provider or pharmacist about medicines that • Go to GENVOYA.com or call 1-800-GILEAD-5 should not be taken with GENVOYA. • If you need help paying for your medicine, visit GENVOYA.com for program information. HOW TO TAKE GENVOYA

• GENVOYA is a complete one pill, once a day HIV-1 medicine. • Take GENVOYA with food.

GENVOYA, the GENVOYA Logo, LOVE WHAT’S INSIDE, SHOW YOUR POWER, GILEAD, and the GILEAD Logo are trademarks of Gilead Sciences, Inc., or its related companies. All other marks referenced herein are the property of their respective owners. Version date: September 2017 © 2017 Gilead Sciences, Inc. All rights reserved. GENC0177 11/17

8 t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD DECEmber 8, 2017 • baltimoreoutloud.com GENC0177_B_9-875x9-6_BaltimoreOUTloud_Skylar_r1v1jl.indd 3 12/4/17 9:54 AM beyond the beltway

—continued from page 5 (Seattle Gay News – Lambda Legal Press Online – Lainey Millen at Goqnotes.com) performing with the group until he was 21. But Release at Sgn.org) that’s when tragedy struck. “Something happened,” Decastro said, hesitating before add- South Carolina Jason Collins, ing, “I was raped.” After the attack, he moved back to the US to be with his family and finish Architect of high court first out NBA college. But he wasn’t feeling well and went to the doctor. As part of the medical exam, he Trump’s anti- says domestic player, works was given an HIV test. And three days before Christmas, in 2011, Decastro learned he was LGBT initiatives violence law for diversity HIV positive. It was unbelievable to him. “I never thought it could happen to a person like made federal covers LGBTQ Philadelphia – Jason Collins came me,” he said, explaining that he came from a to Philadelphia and spoke at William Way military background – his father served in the judge couples LGBT Community Center on November US Navy – and a religious family. 21st. Lately, Collins, the NBA’s first open- His family, he said, was heartbroken, and Washington, DC – The US Senate Columbia, South Carolina – South ly gay player, has been an ambassador he felt like he had let them down. When he November 28th confirmed Gregory Kat- Carolina Equality’s Jeff Ayers announced for the basketball league, promoting the told his mother, who is a breast cancer sur- sas – legal architect of many of Donald that the state Supreme Court ruled in fa- sport, inclusion and diversity. Collins has vivor, “she fell on the floor,” he said. “She Trump’s anti-LGBT efforts – to the power- vor of LGBT couples there, thus opening participated in a number of NBA diversity grabbed my hand and said, ‘Everything’s ful US Federal Court of Appeals for the DC up protections initiatives, but there are still many to join going to be okay. I’m going to take care of Circuit. In a press release, Lambda Legal for both LGBT in. Philadelphia is one of them. “I’ve done you.’” Decastro said he wanted to give up condemned the Senate GOP leadership and straight events with New York teams and some on and those Senators who confirmed Kat- people with re- the West Coast,” he said. “And in Miami sas for this lifetime position on the federal gard to issues they had an Out and Proud Day that I was bench, and not- of domestic vi- at. But as for the 76ers … um, I haven’t ed that this olence. “Now, been invited yet!” vote marks the victims of Collins works with a number of youth beginning of a domestic vio- groups and talks to coaches about year-end surge lence, whether sport-related mindsets that keep perpetu- by the GOP gay or straight, ating. “Something that every male athlete leadership and are protected under the state’s domestic has heard is, ‘Don’t throw like a girl,’” Col- Republicans violence law. It’s a victory for victims and it lins said. “Just a comment like that that ev- on the Senate gives law enforcement and the courts clear eryone has heard, you’re forcing a division Nico Decastro Judiciary Com- guidance moving forward. [This is a] huge between masculine and feminine. In junior mittee to jam victory for the LGBTQ community in South sports, it’s the athletes that set the culture. then. He dropped out of nursing school and through a se- Carolina,” Ayers said. The case, Jane Doe So hopefully we can affect the coaches attempted suicide by overdosing. “I ended Gregory Katsas – no ries of similarly v. State, involved a Richland County wom- who can affect the players and we can up waking up in the hospital with the police Friend of Dorothy dangerous nom- an who applied for a protective order under change that culture.” outside my door.” He was held in the psychi- inees to other the state’s domestic violence law after she Collins came out in 2013 while still play- atric unit for observation for a couple of days. federal courts. was hit and choked by a former female fi- ing in the NBA – a gutsy move, but many “Those two days were a wake-up call for me,” On November 29th the Senate Judicia- ancée. describe his coming out as having looked Decastro said. He realized how many people ry Committee held hearings on the nomina- The ruling declared two sections of easy. He didn’t think so at the time, but it his life impacted and how much they cared tions of Stuart Kyle Duncan to the Fifth Cir- the state’s landmark domestic violence was the way he, his teammates, family and about him. He decided it was time to turn his cuit and Supreme Court “short-lister” David law that made gender references uncon- the general public all handled it that made life around, so Decastro began working for Ryan Stras to the Eighth Circuit. On Novem- stitutional as applied. The “as applied” ap- it seem so. While playing, Collins wore the the Asian Pacific AIDS Intervention Team ber 30th the committee held hearings on L. proach avoids a situation where the law number 98. If you had asked him why when in Los Angeles, and he joined the LA Gay Steven Grasz for the Eighth Circuit – who itself would be unconstitutional, render- he chose that number, he’d tell you it was Men’s Chorus. “I was helping people by tell- was deemed unanimously “not qualified” by ing it useless in its entirety. And the court because he fouled a lot and wanted to mess ing my story,” he said, both at work and as a the nonpartisan American Bar Association – agreed that there was “no reasonable ba- with the refs. (Basketball refs hold up fingers featured performer with the chorus. “I found and Mark Norris for the US District Court for sis … to support a definition that results in to represent the fouling player. Who knew?) hope through them.” He’s also returned to the Western District of Tennessee. Lambda disparate treatment of same-sex couples,” But the truth of the matter was it was also singing and songwriting. His latest song, Legal opposes all of these nominees, cit- thus extending protections to any unmar- the year Matthew Shepard was murdered; “Lost Soul,” is about how he hit rock bottom ing each individual’s dangerous record and ried couples, regardless of their sexual the number was a tribute to the gay college and attempted suicide, but then found hope contempt for LGBT Americans. orientation. student. (Philadelphia Gay News – Scott A. and peace with his life. Lambda Legal’s Sharon McGowan “This moves South Carolina forward on Drake at Epgn.com) Noting that because he was diag- said, “The courts play an essential part in this important issue by expanding protec- nosed soon after being infected, Decastro protecting those most vulnerable in this tions under the law for victims of domes- said that he was able to begin taking HIV country, and the damage being done to the tic violence no matter who you love,” said From boy band to medications early and his viral load quick- judicial system by this administration can- Nekki Shutt, one of the attorneys repre- ly became undetectable. He hopes others not be overstated. Senators abdicate their senting SC Equality. “I applaud the state HIV activist will follow that lead. And this World AIDS constitutional duty when they simply roll Supreme Court’s ruling. The state’s crim- Day, that’s the message he has to share: over and allow Donald Trump to pack the inal domestic violence law now includes Dallas – Nico Decastro moved to the Get tested. It can save your life. t (Dallas courts with lifetime appointees who share everyone, gay or straight, which is what Philippines as a teen to pursue his dreams of Voice – David Taffet at Dallasvoice.com) Trump’s distorted view of the Constitution.” a good law is supposed to do.” (Q Notes being a singer. There, he joined a boy band,

BALTIMORE OUTLOUD DECEmber 8, 2017 • baltimoreoutloud.com t 9 VoiceVoice ofof thethe CenterCenter Baltimore Pride 2018 Theme Each year Baltimore Pride has that it was “One Baltimore.” In gestion to [email protected] with page with an online voting poll. a different theme that sets the 2018 the Baltimore Pride theme the subject title “Baltimore Pride The winning theme will be an- tone for the summer’s cele- will come from you, our com- 2018 Theme Submission.” We nounced in January of 2018. The brations. Last year it was “Un- munity. The Center is asking will be collecting themes un- winner of the theme will get the leashed” and we unleashed our community to submit their til the end of December 2017. special opportunity to ride with our fury in our new location at recommendations for the 2018 The top 5 themes chosen by the the King and Queen of pride at Charles North Community and Baltimore Pride theme. Send Baltimore Pride committee will the next Baltimore Pride parade. Old Goucher. The year before your Baltimore Pride theme sug- be announced on our facebook

10 t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD DECEmber 8, 2017 • baltimoreoutloud.com THE LATEST UPDATES FROM THE GAY, LESBIAN, BISEXUAL, AND TRANSGENDER COMMUNITY CENTER OF BALTIMORE AND CENTRAL MARYLAND

Events Calendar: December 2017 Sundays Mondays Tuesdays Wednesdays Thursdays Fridays Saturdays 12/08 12/09 12/10 12/11 12/12 12/13 12/14 Black Men’s Xchange -Alcoholics Narcotics Anonymous Teen Art Group ACCELERATE FreeState Justice Youth Against Oppres- 6:30pm – 10:00pm Anonymous 11:00am-1:00pm 5:00pm-7:00pm Listening Session Legal Clinic sion TAG Outreach 5:00pm-8:00pm Gentle Mindful Yoga 5:00pm-9:00pm 3:00pm-5:00pm 4:30pm-6:30pm 12:00am-4:00am 3:30pm-4:45pm ($10) 12/18 Free & Confidential Peculiar Blerd League 12/16 Helping Hands 12/19 HIV Testing 6:00pm-9:00pm 12/15 Alcoholics Anonymous Clothing Closet Giovanni’s Room Poet- 6:30pm-8:30pm Baltimore Trans Mas- 5:00pm-8:00pm 12/17 1:00pm-5:00pm ry Workshop The Mankind Project culine Alliance Narcotics Anonymous Teen Art Group 6:30pm-8:30pm ($5) 6:30pm-8:30pm 6:30pm-9:00pm 12/22 12/23 11:00am-1:00pm 5:00pm-7:00pm SILhouette Sexual Compulsives Get Smart with iChat Black Men’s Xchange Alcoholics Anonymous Gentle Mindful Yoga 7:30pm-9:30pm Anonymous 7:00pm-9:00pm 6:30pm – 10:00pm 5:00pm-8:00pm 3:30pm-4:45pm ($10) 7:00p-8:00pm TAG Outreach Trans Baltimore 12/21 12:00am-4:00am 7:00pm-9:00pm -Youth Against 12/20 Oppression Free & Confidential 4:30pm-6:30pm HIV Testing 6:30pm-8:30pm The Mankind Project 6:30pm-8:30pm Sexual Compulsives Anonymous To our dedicated volunteers: 7:00p-8:00pm What a whirlwind year! From start to finish, you’ve been incredible, and because of your dedication and hard work, our center has remained a fixture in Baltimore’s sexuality and gender minority communities. Thank you so much for your commitment of time and energy to this important work. We love and appreciate you all! Warmly, The GLCCB Staff

BALTIMORE OUTLOUD DECEmber 8, 2017 • baltimoreoutloud.com t 11 thinking outloud

up having sex with only the briefest of con- way males do. Consent: Shades of Gray versation which goes something like “how In the case of Brock Turner – the Stan- about coming to my place? (wink wink)”. In ford swimmer who is fighting to get himself by merle guetteur belly and waited for his reaction. We danced another case, a woman is randomly mugged delisted from Ohio’s sex-offender registry Claims of sexual harassment fill the airwaves closer and closer, then I put my hand on his by a masked man, who ties her up and has after serving a prison sentence for what was and are sending famous heads tumbling shoulder, and then my other prosecuted as rape – the girl got blind drunk every day. So what should be an operative hand on his other shoulder, and at a frathouse party, threw herself all over a definition of consent? A simple “no” won’t do: soon we were kissing. Then af- frat guy, and went home with him. Of course, so many sexual encounters begin with a “no” ter this, he had given me all he he thought they were going to have sex. It’s and turn into a consensual situation. That’s wanted to give, and he smiled not that she claims she had no idea she was the nature of seduction, and women like seat me and pushed me away in for that, but only that she couldn’t consent duction. It’s very on-point that the acclaimed gently and went away. Almost because she was drunk. However, all the new gay film Call Me By Your Name comes no words were spoken. By a guys at gay dance clubs are drunk, too. How out in the midst of this and even women woman’s yardstick, if he had many young men I have known who had sex think it’s beautiful. The characters don’t turn been a she and she had been when drunk and woke up next to someone to each other and say “Is it okay if I touch drunk and regretted it after- they don’t recognize? In worst cases the your penis?” No romantic movie ever went ward, and if she “looked up to” other guy was not attractive, and they just that way, and no one would watch them if me, she might say it was non- introduced themselves the next morning. If they did. consensual. the guy was good looking, they might try to Consent has also to do with surround- So, it behooves us to in- ings and circumstances. If I’m in a gay club clude expectations in our oper- with loud music, it’s assumed that at least ative definition of consent. Do “‘Is it okay if I touch some guys are there hoping to get intimate the parties have an expectation your penis?’ No with someone, even if ostensibly people are that something might happen? It’s even that way with Call Me By Your Name – even women think there nominally to drink and dance to music. it’s a beautiful relationship romantic movie ever I once spotted a very beautiful 20-year- two people at random on a street. Consid- contained that line, and old on a very crowded dance floor. He ended er two cases. In one case, two men make sex with her while she is tied up. In both cas- up right in front of me, and I looked into his eye contact, thinking each other must be gay es, the initiator has the intent to have sex no one would watch eyes until he noticed me looking at him. He (based on the way they dress) and flirt with with the other person. In the first case, body didn’t look away, so I poked him gently in the each other with eye contact alone, and end cues tell the initiator that there is some inter- them if they did.” est. In the second case, there are no body cues – the initiator is raping the other person, by force, and the force is not previously have brunch with him. agreed to. In neither case are many words One must take responsibility for the mes- spoken. There isn’t a ques- sages one gives, given the importance of cir- tion posed – no “yes” cumstances. Demand- or “no.” The distinc- ing a transactional “yes” tion is that in the first or “no,” signing on the case, visual body dotted line of a contract, cues gave the initi- is simply an idea which ator the expectation stacks the deck against that their interest men in a way that’s unfair was reciprocated. – like a big sting operation. But in between Clearly the solution these two cases is to raise the expectation there are the cas- that females, as a blanket es where the lines rule, do not want sex the are blurred. The same way males do, and man thought the can’t walk away from sex woman was in- as easily as males do. The terested, but she second part of that is just as was merely going important as the first: males along with it, and do not react as negatively as then felt violat- females do to being cajoled ed afterwards. into sexual contact they don’t There was an absence Stanford want. They don’t consider of “yes” and often not a swimmer Brock it as much of a violation. It’st my “no,” in many cases (and Turner – rape? hope that society will move on from the pres- Live DJ in the Pub | No Cover in Louis CK’s case, there Or drunken ent orgy of accusation and retribution – which were “yes’s”). So all we judgement? puts any male in the firing line to lose job, have to go off of was the career, and family on the basis of essentially circumstances: and we must note that the unprovable accusations – and undertakes a society has constructed a false expectation nuanced discussion about consent in all its that females want sexual contact the same shades of gray. t 12 t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD DECEmber 8, 2017 • baltimoreoutloud.com quality of life // Health and Wellness

Narcissism is a key personality trait that ing relationship that exists among posi- can be seen in most harassers. Narcissists are tive-negative couples the world over. people whose world revolves entirely around My Fabulous Cue the music during their conversa- Open Wide themselves, and they feel that others’ worlds tion. Suddenly, all of the actors in the Mer- should resolve around them as well. To nar- Disease ce cast appear in choir formation and sing ask Dr Eva cissists, other people exist only in relation to By Mark S. King what might be the most beautiful song Dr Eva Hersh themselves. Since other people don’t exist ex- written for the series, “Your Cure,” by com- cept to meet the narcissist’s needs, it doesn’t poser Adam J. Rineer. It literally brings matter if they’re hurt or injured unless the in- HIV-positive and negative people together, Sexual jury interferes with their ability to meet the The World AIDS lifting up those with HIV with a message narcissist’s needs. Narcissists often rise high that, until there is a cure, “that’s what my Harassment... within their professions due to their capacity Day Anthem love is for.” for self-promotion. By definition, a narcissist I’m not crying. You’re crying. The song, What Can Be cannot truly believe he has done something We Really Need released today as a promotional clip for wrong, although if it will help him he may say the show, is the World AIDS Day anthem Done? he’s done wrong. A person like this who makes we didn’t even know we needed. What a an unwanted sexual approach that is rebuffed Most people would walk away if the future welcome message it is. will feel that the rejecting other party, and not seemed unclear Charles Sanchez became a friend In the past two months, an unprecedented himself, is at fault. To minimize the chance of and shut you out because they’re when I stalked him online after writing number of well-known men have been re- rejection, narcissists tend to approach people afraid. But I’m not. I’m right here. about “Merce” for the first time. I vealed as sexual harassers and fired or forced for sexual contacts who find it difficult to refuse That’s what my love is for. My love to resign from high-profile jobs. There has – employees, job applicants, students, much will be your been lots of justified condemnation of the ha- younger people. cure. rassers as well as praise for the bravery of the – “Your people who reported them. “Unfortunately, a Cure,” an There will probably be many more scan- original song dalous and surprising cases before this wave narcissist cannot be from season of denunciations ends. Seeing these harass- taught to stop being a two of “Mer- ers brought down is satisfying and represents ce” long-overdue justice to supporters of women’s narcissist. With this “Merce,” rights. It is especially gratifying to the many the web se- women and some men who have personal- personality trait as ries about a ly experienced sexual harassment. Still the well as some others gay New York- question remains, will punishment of current er living with abusers prevent future abuse? Unfortunately, (such as sociopathy) the HIV, is a little it probably won’t. bonkers. The Consider the death penalty. Comparisons realistic approach is candy-colored couldn’t re- of states that do and don’t have the death pen- for potential targets to musical come- Tyne Firmin and Mark S. sist his theater geek joy and alty show that states with the death penalty dy, written by and starring the King during filming of sea- his sense of humor. What I have just as many murders as states without resist abusive behavior.” singular Charles Sanchez, has son two of ‘Merce.’ credit: never expected was an invi- it. There are several reasons for this. In the “the lowbudget appeal of an Flavia Colucci tation to play Aunt Bless in first place, few murders are planned rational- Unfortunately, a narcissist cannot be early John Waters romp,” as season two. ly. People are not thinking about the possible taught to stop being a narcissist. With this I wrote when season one hit But there I was, in full drag legal penalties. Second, people who commit personality trait as well as some others (such your computer screens two alongside Tyne Firmin as all types of crimes don’t expect to be caught as sociopathy) the realistic approach is for po- years ago. Momma, singing and dancing to the orig- or punished- if they did, they would not com- tential targets to resist abusive behavior. This What “Merce” also has, in great abun- inal song “Bless Your Heart” on the set mit the crime. Criminals tend to be focused could mean, for example, leaving the room or dance, is heart. The central love story, be- of Merce last month. Words to describe on immediate rewards, not on long term con- loudly yelling “no!” in response to inappropriate tween HIV-positive Merce and his HIV-neg- such an event are fairly useless. sequences. More crimes are impulsive than behavior. It could mean avoiding being alone ative boyfriend, doesn’t just cover PrEP or There is still time to support Merce, planned. These factors also apply to the be- with the offender, and helping other potential being undetectable. In one scene from the which is now in post-production with a tar- havior of repeated sexual harassers. There targets avoid being alone with him. It could upcoming season, the lovebirds actually get of summer 2018 for its release. All do- are also some additional factors: denial and mean speaking openly with others about inci- consider what a cure for HIV would mean. nations to their fundraising campaign are narcissism. dents and submitting a joint complaint, which Then, in the kind of romantic gesture that tax deductible. I’ve donated 20 bucks here Denial is what it sounds like: the harasser is harder to dismiss than a single individual’s would make any person living with HIV and there. They appreciate every dime. denies he is doing / has done anything wrong. complaint. Over time, preventive action by po- swoon, Merce’s boyfriend assures him Achieving a cure for HIV infection may Deniers insist that forced sexual contact was tential targets and changes in business man- that, until science straightens out the de- or may not be within our reach anytime actually agreed to, or simply deny that any agement to respond appropriately to sexual tails, his love will be the cure. soon. Fingers crossed. In the meantime, a contact occurred, or claim it could not have harassment will do more than firing harassers Not love alone, of course. Our HIV-pos- world free of HIV stigma, where HIV nega- happened because, for example, the accusing to change the adverse environment in which itive lead character is dedicated to his tive people offer love and support to their woman is “unattractive.” Another form of denial many people still work today. t treatment regimen. What the boyfriend HIV positive brothers and sisters, is my is to admit the harassing behavior occurred but Eva Hersh is a Baltimore family physician. represents, though, is the non-judgmental World AIDS Day wish for all of us. “Your claim that the woman “misunderstood”: it was Send your comments and questions to her by support that is so critical to people living Cure” is a charming step in that direction. t just a joke, or just friendly affection. email at [email protected]. with HIV. Theirs is exactly the kind of lov- BALTIMORE OUTLOUD DECEmber 8, 2017 • baltimoreoutloud.com t 13 quality of life // Health and Wellness

“Awkward: telling the stranger next to Holiday Havoc? Depression, you on a flight that you don’t want to have Ask a long conversation. We need Tinder for Loneliness During Winter Months airplanes: a button to signal “chat mode” or “work mode” without being rude.” Dr. J The credit goes to Adam Grant (@ Can Lead to Increased Risk of Janan Broadbent, Ph.D. AdamMGrant, Adamgrant.net), a brilliantly creative professor Suicide for LGBT Elders around through ice and at the Wharton snow, especially for folks Chat vs. School of the By Monte Ephraim who have limited mobility. When you’re University of Chase Brexton Health Care constantly low-grade exhausted, everything Pennsylvania. For many LGBT individuals, especially elders, seems dark and kind of terrible, you don’t Work Mode Indeed, whether the winter months can be a cold and lonely really feel like talking anyway, it’s freezing, Social media can be criticized for many rea- we encounter a time. For some, feelings of sadness and de- the walk is not shoveled and maybe you’re sons, but let me acknowledge that it also stranger on an pression can take a deep hold, and lead them a little unsteady on your feet, and getting out has many upsides. I’ve made a number of airplane, or sit- to consider suicide. of the house to get some exercise or spend acquantances with whom the paths would ting in a cubicle It’s important that those who may be ex- time with friends can seem overwhelming. not have crossed due to physical distance at work, or men- periencing isolation or depression, and the Of course, that’s the time you most need the and separation of knowledge spheres. I tally occupied at people close to them, understand the warning endorphins that come with moving your body find new information and resources in that home, we do have signs and risks of suicide during the winter and the support of caring people. venue that enrich my life and work. Here is people that com- months. Support and assistance is available What are a few of the major warning a tweet that gave me food for thought: pletely ignore what we are to those who need it. signs that an individual might present? doing and pipe in. Urgent need to get an Kate Bishop, education coordinator at the The biggest indicator may seem obvious answer? Disregarding other people be- LGBT Health Resource Center, offers the fol- – if a friend says they are thinking of suicide, cause our state of mind overrides others? lowing advice to elders coping with loneliness please believe them! Most folks do tell some- Whatever the reason, there are times when and depression. one of their plans before attempting to end dealing with mental health challenges; call I hear people complain that they like to What types of health disparities do their life. Other signs include cutting back on 410-523-1694 or e-mail info@heartsand- read, or watch a TV show or game, or even LGBT individuals, particularly elders, face social interaction, loss of interest in activities ears.org to find out about groups or talk to want to be quietly contemplating life, when that makes them more susceptible to these that they used to enjoy, a preoccupation with someone who will understand. Group and/ others need more cues not to interfere. feelings? death, lack of concern about personal safety, or individual counseling can be a wonder- This becomes a bigger issue at work, Statistically, older LGBT adults have a foregoing self-care, medication regimens, ful holiday gift for yourself – call Chase when colleagues stop in willy nilly, and at much higher risk of social isolation than either or personal grooming, experienc- Brexton’s Behavioral Health de- home, with our partners, when they insist younger LGBT people or other older adults. ing or expecting a significant partment for an appointment on “connecting.” Studies have found that LGBT elders are personal loss, feeling hope- at 410-837-2050 x8810, or So how do you handle this? I have a half as likely to be partnered, twice as likely less and/or worthless, put- check the therapists who friend who started to put on ear buds at to live alone, and four times more likely than ting affairs in order, giv- advertise in this paper. work to get away from the visitors. The flip- their straight peers to be childless. Added to ing things away, making Last, social support side is that especially in a relationship, the that loneliness, the accumulated impact of a changes in wills, stock- has been proven to be interrupter feels offended if there is no im- lifetime of trauma due to severe prejudice and Kate piling medication or extremely helpful in mediate response back. Being ignored and discrimination often leads to compromised Bishop obtaining other lethal working through dark not heard causes hurt feelings and if not physical and mental health for our elders. means, and fore- days, so keep an eye addressed, eventually leads to creating a A national health study on LGBT elders shadowing remarks out at Facebook.com/ wedge in communication that can take us found that 31 percent had clinically diagnos- such as “This is the chasebrexton.lgbt/ for to divisive attitudes. able depression. Across the lifespan, our com- So what to do whether you are the of- munity suffers from significantly higher rates last time that you’ll monthly social oppor- fender or the offendee? The key lies in ef- of depression, anxiety, alcohol and tobacco see me” or “I won’t be tunities for LGBT peo- abuse, cardiovascular disease, HIV, and dia- needing any more ap- ple over age 50 through fective communication. What that means, betes. These are all chronic conditions which pointments.” our SAGECAP program to start with, is not to take it personally. may worsen as we age, adding physical hard- Where can LGBT indi- at the LGBT Health Re- We can’t read other people’s minds, even ship and chronic pain, decreasing mobility, viduals and elders turn for source Center. if we have known them for a long time, let and increasing emotional distress, which in help if they are contemplating For or more information alone a seatmate. So before getting any turn can lead to further isolation from friends, suicide, or feeling lonely or de- about LGBT Elder Care, con- feelings hurt, ask if it is okay to talk or not. family, and community. Sadly, a national study pressed? tact [email protected], call 410-837- It is important at this point for the respond- showed that 39 percent of LGB older adults Fortunately, there are many kind ears out 2050 x1049, or visit Chasebrexton.org/ er to acknowledge honestly and say yes or t and 71 percent of transgender elders have se- there ready to support those who are strug- LGBTElders. no without bringing in a sense of obliga- riously considered taking their own lives. gling. National hotlines like SAGE (Services The LGBT Health Resource Center of tion and then resenting the consequence. What effect can the winter months have and Advocacy for GLBT Elders) at 1-888- Chase Brexton Health Care is to provide We have all become aware of how power on these feelings? 234-SAGE, the National Institute on Aging’s LGBTQ individuals and their families with in one individual harms the connection in Untreated depression is the number one Older Adult Friendship Line at 1-800-971- welcoming access to expert health informa- more ways than one. So treating others as cause of suicide. The dark, cold, shortened 0016, and the National Suicide Prevention tion and resources that will enhance well- an equal partner, whether in a long-term days of winter have been shown to cause or Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255 can help. ness and quality of life. For more info, visit relationship, or a temporary one, goes a exacerbate depression symptoms for many In Baltimore, Hearts and Ears is an or- ResourceCenter.lgbt. long way towards making life more enjoy- people. In addition, it’s just harder to get ganization created to support LGBTQ people able and less “awkward”! t

14 t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD DECEmber 8, 2017 • baltimoreoutloud.com quality of life

Your guest list – The size and compo- Getting the sition of your guest list has significant impact on your wedding. Your guest list affects the Wedding choice of size, style, and location of your ven- You Want ue. The number of guests also determines David Egan the cost of food, drink, and catering staff, which is charged per person if you’re using a professional caterer. Your guest list decisions affect the time Congrats! and effort involved in everything related to your guests, from sending invitations to the You’re Engaged! length of the reception. In a less tangible but equally important way, your guest list affects Where do you need to start with your wed- the energy or, if you prefer, the feel of your ding planning? Based on my experi- ceremony and, to an even greater ence working with thousands of cou- extent, your reception. In general, ples, the two most important things to Now more guests mean more of every- know – two things you have to know thing! It’s a major driver of your before you spend a dime – are how what? budget. many people you plan to invite, and how Your guest list is the number of people much money you have available to spend. you plan to invite to your wedding. It’s not the Every aspect of your wedding planning is number that actually attend. You won’t know related to those two things: your budget and how many people accept your invitation until your anticipated guest count. 30 days before your wedding and, until your Your budget – Your budget wedding day, how many ac- represents the total tually attend. All of your ma- amount of money jor decisions will have been you have to spend made by then. for absolutely every- You may have heard thing. That includes that 20% of guests decline. your venue, catering, That average, over some photography, enter- unknown thousands of tainment, decorating, weddings, can be mislead- officiant, ceremony ing – and may not even be music, and cake. Oth- correct. I’m going to give er things you might you very different advice! StartStart YourYour NewNew LifeLife WithWith choose to include are Expect that everyone you transportation, videog- raphy, wedding invite will say yes. If you create your guest TheThe PerfectPerfect SoundtrackSoundtrack planning, favors, and invitations. Costs that list with care, your acceptance rate should be are related but are usually not included in the much higher than that large sample suggests. True Harmony Events is an elite group of DJs and wedding planning wedding budget per se include clothing, gifts, Who will you invite? That’s a big question! professionals that break the mold; We love music and we love being the rehearsal dinner, rings, and other jewelry. My best advice and the advice that I most fre- a part of people's lives. Honeymoons are generally not included quently offer comes from Judith Martin, aka We plan events and weddings that take the event to another level in the wedding budget. Keeping the two sep- “Miss Manners”: Invite the people you love and people to another place. arate will keep you from trading off the hon- and who love you. It’s really that simple! eymoon money for the wedding money and Once you have your guest list complete, Our team is unrivaled in music knowledge, each one with vice versa. give or take ten or so people, you have an a specialty. There is not a style of music around that we don't Couples’ total wedding spending varies expected guest count. Do your very best to have in our catalog of more than a million songs. widely. For example, a wedding ceremony make it as real as possible. From music to planning, our team is specialized in planning and reception for 100 guests might cost a As you might guess, these two param- the perfect event. eters, your budget and your guest list, are couple thousand dollars for a simple back- From start to finish or day-of coordination we have you covered! yard affair. That same size of wedding at interconnected. My counsel is to decide who Chase Court, the venue I own in Baltimore, you want at your wedding and then see what commonly costs between $15,000 and that buys with the budget you’ve set. We’ll $25,000. The average wedding in Baltimore, talk about all of the details involved in that, taking into account all sizes and shapes, soon! costs about $37,000. Your guest count has Next time: Having the money discussion a lot to do with that final number, as we’ll see with your family. t shortly. David L. Egan is the proprietor and stew- DJ/MC DANCE LIGHTS UPLIGHTS You absolutely need to know from the ard of Chase Court, a wedding and event ven- start how much you can spend, within a ue in downtown Baltimore. Visit Chasecourt. 202-798-6544 • trueharmonydjs.com/lgbt.html range of a couple of thousand dollars. That’s com, and follow ChaseCourtWeddingVenue Consultations are free and available 7 days a week. close enough at this point. on Instagram and Facebook. BALTIMORE OUTLOUD DECEmber 8, 2017 • baltimoreoutloud.com t 15 In adults with HIV on ART who have diarrhea not caused by an infection

IMPORTANT PATIENT INFORMATION This is only a summary. See complete Prescribing Information at Mytesi.com or by calling 1-844-722-8256. This does not take the place of talking with your doctor about your medical condition or treatment. What Is Mytesi? Mytesi is a prescription medicine used to improve symptoms of noninfectious diarrhea (diarrhea not caused by a bacterial, viral, or parasitic infection) in adults living with HIV/AIDS on ART. Do Not Take Mytesi if you have diarrhea caused by an infection. Before you start Mytesi, your doctor and you should make sure your diarrhea is not caused by an infection (such as bacteria, virus, or parasite). Possible Side Effects of Mytesi Include: • Upper respiratory tract infection (sinus, nose, and throat infection) • Bronchitis (swelling in the tubes that carry air to and from your lungs) • Cough • Flatulence (gas) • Increased bilirubin (a waste product when red blood cells break down) For a full list of side effects, please talk to your doctor. Tell your doctor if you have any side effect that bothers you or does not go away. You are encouraged to report negative side effects of prescription drugs to the FDA. Visit www.fda.gov/medwatch or Tired of planning your life around diarrhea? call 1-800-FDA-1088. Should I Take Mytesi If I Am: Pregnant or Planning to Become Pregnant? • Studies in animals show that Mytesi could harm an unborn baby or affect the ability to become pregnant Enough is Enough • There are no studies in pregnant women taking Mytesi • This drug should only be used during pregnancy if clearly needed Get relief. Pure and simple. Ask your doctor about Mytesi. A Nursing Mother? • It is not known whether Mytesi is passed through human breast milk Mytesi (crofelemer): • If you are nursing, you should tell your doctor before starting Mytesi • Is the only medicine FDA-approved to relieve diarrhea in people with HIV • Your doctor will help you to decide whether to stop nursing or to stop • Treats diarrhea differently by normalizing the flow of water in the GI tract taking Mytesi Under 18 or Over 65 Years of Age? • Has the same or fewer side effects as placebo in clinical studies • Mytesi has not been studied in children under 18 years of age • Comes from a tree sustainably harvested in the Amazon Rainforest • Mytesi studies did not include many people over the age of 65. So it is not clear if this age group will respond differently. Talk to your doctor to What is Mytesi? find out if Mytesi is right for you Mytesi is a prescription medicine that helps relieve symptoms of diarrhea not caused by What Should I Know About Taking Mytesi an infection (noninfectious) in adults living with HIV/AIDS on antiretroviral therapy (ART). With Other Medicines? If you are taking any prescription or over-the-counter medicine, herbal Important Safety Information supplements, or vitamins, tell your doctor before starting Mytesi. Mytesi is not approved to treat infectious diarrhea (diarrhea caused by bacteria, a virus, What If I Have More Questions About Mytesi? or a parasite). Before starting you on Mytesi, your healthcare provider will first be sure that you For more information, please see the full Prescribing Information at do not have infectious diarrhea. Otherwise, there is a risk you would not receive the right medicine Mytesi.com or speak to your doctor or pharmacist. and your infection could get worse. In clinical studies, the most common side effects that occurred To report side effects or make a product complaint or for additional information, call 1-844-722-8256. more often than with placebo were upper respiratory tract (sinus, nose, and throat) infection (5.7%), bronchitis (3.9%), cough (3.5%), flatulence (3.1%), and increased bilirubin (3.1%). Rx Only For Copay Savings Card and Manufactured by Patheon, Inc. Patient Assistance, see Mytesi.com for Napo Pharmaceuticals, Inc. San Francisco, CA 94105 Copyright © Napo Pharmaceuticals, Inc. Mytesi comes from the Croton lechleri tree harvested Please see complete Prescribing Information at Mytesi.com. in South America.

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16 t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD DECEmber 8, 2017 • baltimoreoutloud.com Spiritual Directory

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http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/ Lively Arts // out on screen

definitely geared to adults, so think twice als are stunningly beautiful and the 3D before taking the real young ones. gives everything, especially the Land of I really didn’t know what to expect from the Dead, a lot of depth to add to the vast- A Peak of Music Coco. When it started, it wasn’t as hilari- ness of the space. The direction and music ous as I thought it would be and perhaps are also top notch, but it’s the writing here Coco will fill that was just the misdirection from the pre- that makes Coco such a special film, es- views. There is some humor, to be sure, pecially as it develops the relationship be- your heart but for an animated film, the story really tween Ernesto and his guide through the & Emotion strives to remain realistic, at least while Land of the Dead, Hector, a bit of a ne’er- by Chuck Duncan Miguel (voiced by newcomer Anthony Gon- Ernesto is in the world of the living. The do-well who can’t cross over because no When Pixar isn’t making movies about zalez), longing to become a musician. But family dynamic feels real, with Ernesto be- one has placed his photo on an altar (the toys, fish, cars, emotions or monsters, you his family forbids music in, or near, their ing forbidden to hear any music while also Dead have some amazing technology to can say their human characters have been home because generations ago, Miguel’s being dragged into the family’s shoemak- determine these kinds of things). He’s pretty ... white. Hoping to rectify that situ- great-great-grandfather abandoned his ing business, of which he wants no part. helping Ernesto in exchange for the boy ation and add a bit more diversity to their wife and baby daughter (the Coco of the And while the film is called Coco, the ti- taking his photo back to the living so he films, the studio has put together their first title) to pursue a career in music and sing tle character is an ancient woman barely can visit once again. The only real goof- movie featuring a full cast of Mexican char- for the people of the world. Since then, his holding on to her last moments of life but iness in the movie comes from the com- acters and set the story during one of the image has been torn out of the photo of his is the key to a very pivotal moment of the ic relief dog Dante who may not actually biggest holidays in the country, Dia de los family leaving just a body. What Miguel’s story. Regardless of the animation style, be what he seems. While these films are Muertos, the Day of the Dead. If you’re un- family doesn’t know is that he idolizes the this feels like a very real, grounded family. complete team efforts, it’s the people who familiar with the holiday, or just know about country’s great- The Land of the Dead, however, is a came up with the story – Lee Unkrich, Ja- it from the cute decorated skeletons you est singer, Er- completely son Katz, Matthew Aldrich and Adrian Mo- see around Halloween, it is the one day nesto de la Cruz lina – who deserve the credit for of the year when the dead ancestors can (voiced by Ben- hitting all the right notes and mak- come back to the world of the living and jamin Bratt), and ing this movie rise above most an- visit their families, as long as the family wants to perform imated fare, and they are certainly has placed their photo on an alter in the one of his songs deserving of an Oscar nomination home to help remember them. And that is at the Dia de los for Best Screenplay. the jumping off point for Coco. Muertos festi- And I’d be remiss if I didn’t The story finds a young Mexican boy, val in the town mention the music and the songs, square. An ac- particularly de la Cruz’s theme song cident at home “Remember Me.” That one plays a reveals to Mi- few times throughout the movie, and geul that there what could be seen as a song about is more to the photo two lovers torn apart, becomes a of his forgotten descendant and when he very poignant, tear-jerking piece of unfolds it, he sees the man is holding a fantastical place, some- Proving a the story. It will be stuck in your head guitar ... the very same one used by de where you’d probably cartoon can tug for a while after seeing the movie, and it la Cruz. Could he be Ernesto’s long lost want to spend eternity, at heartstrings should also earn an Oscar nomination if great-great-grandfather? Determined to like some big, color- not the prize itself (and I bet the Golden sing in the competition, Ernesto follows de ful version of a futuris- Globes will award it Best Song). la Cruz’s motto of seizing the opportunity tic city from Metropolis And speaking of Oscars, in the history and he breaks into the mausoleum where done over as Las Vegas of the Academy Awards, only one animat- de la Cruz is interred and “borrows” the on steroids. But even ed movie has been nominated in the Best famous guitar that hangs on the wall. But among all the fantastical elements, the Picture category, Disney’s Beauty and the We offer a 20% off twanging the strings causes something to writers have made sure to keep the emo- Beast. Coco almost certainly has a lock discount for all area happen and suddenly Ernesto is transport- tions on a very human level, and they will on picking up the Oscar for Best Animat- ed to the Land of the Dead where he must tug at your heartstrings many times as the ed Film (and let’s add the Golden Globe in students with valid student ID. locate his family members to get back plot unfolds (and there are a couple of there as well), but I firmly believe the film Tuesday-Thursday home, but not before introducing himself moments that really aren’t for young chil- also deserves to be nominated in the Best to de la Cruz. But Ernesto is in for some dren including a murder and an attempted Picture category as well. I haven’t seen an- from open to 4 p.m. big surprises as his family’s story unfolds. murder), including a moment that answers other movie yet this year that has moved Pixar has had a hugely successful run the question as to what happens to a soul me and affected me emotionally as much Any first time client of animated films mostly due to the fact when there’s no one left in the living world as Coco has and any movie, animated or that even when the majority of them are to remember them. And then comes the live action, that can do that should get all 20% off also geared to younger audiences, the stories twist to Ernesto’s quest that impacts his the praise it deserves. And Coco certainly still play well to the adults that bring those entire family, living and dead, that just hits deserves it. Unless something big comes 2801 Huntingdon Ave. kids to the theater. The Pixar writers have you in the heart again. This really is a box along between now and the end of the Baltimore, MD ~ 21211 always been able to deftly weave together of Kleenex movie! Just thinking about it year, I’m pretty sure this will be at the very Phone: 410.646.8115 stories that don’t condescend to the chil- now still brings tears to my eyes. top of my Favorite Movies of 2017 list. If www.fringebaltimore.com dren and don’t bore the adults. With Coco, All of the voice acting is perfection nothing else, it has made me even more while the previews may make this seem (and I loved the inclusion of Frida Kahlo as aware of always remembering our depart- like a film geared to kids who want to see a character), and Pixar good luck charm ed family members, never to let them be cute, funny skeletons, this is a story that is John Ratzenberger is here too! The visu- forgotten. Do not miss this movie! t

18 t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD DECEmber 8, 2017 • baltimoreoutloud.com Lively Arts // Out on Stage Everyman Theatre Brings Lisa Lampanelli Takes CenterStage by Storm The Revolutionists to Baltimore —continued from page 1 dience. As you know, I’m an insult comic. By Frankie Kujawa retell it from the point of view of did I get out of it? Nothing but a UTI and a Whatever strikes me from the audience at Picture it: Paris, 1793. The The French these women. I was also drawn stiff neck! I’m not ready to have a pinched the time. Anything that makes me angry I Reign of Terror rages on as to this production because of muscle so, no, I won’t be breaking my cel- will rant and rave about. four women search for the Revolution with a Everyman Theatre’s resident ibacy for [Baltimore]. Though, I may look FK: So what’s next for Lisa Lampan- right words and actions to en- acting company and being able but not touch! elli? sure their impact on a world feminine Bent to do this play with three com- FK: As an ally, why do you think you LL: We just closed the Off-Broadway full of conflict. No, this is not pany members, and one who is have such a bond with the LGBTQ com- the History Channel’s latest reincarnation of familiar with everyone else. To do this with ac- munity? “I’m not ready to have a The Golden Girls, but Everyman Theatre’s tors who have an existing relationship, and an LL: Well, it started off because they re- bold, brave, blisteringly funny play The Rev- ease, is very rare. It’s rare to find an ensemble ally got me. The first group that really got pinched muscle so, no, olutionists. Running from December 6th to like Everyman in our country. my comedy were gay men. The lesbians, I won’t be breaking my January 7th, this work from playwright Lauren FK: Beth, in your own words can you they took a little longer, but eventually they Gunderson takes audiences on a revolutionary describe your version of Marie Antoinette? came around and really seem to enjoy my celibacy for Baltimore.” journey about feminism, legacy, and standing BH: Most of my comedy in this play – and show. Ever since the gay men were so up for your beliefs. Told from the point of view most of my comedy in my life, for that matter – amazing to me from word one I thought, run of Stuffed [written by Lampanelli], and of Queen Marie Antoinette, assassin Charlotte I’ve stolen from the great Madeline Kahn and “Okay, let’s somehow give back to them.” I’m taking a two-month vacation! I don’t Corday, playwright Olympe de Gouges, and my favorite drag performers. Marie is outside That’s why I aligned myself with Gay Men’s know why I took pity on this CenterStage Caribbean spy Marianne Angelle, audiences and fabulous, but also very real. Health Crisis in New York. Somehow, the Theatre to interrupt my vacation to come learn how and why these women’s lives end FK: What makes this piece so signifi- gays and I go together like peanut butter down! Just like back in the day they need- on the chopping block and what resonates cant to you both, considering the nation’s and chocolate. ed Joan Crawford to come in, I guess Cen- with us today. Baltimore OUTloud recently current climate? FK: Where does your inspiration for terStage needs Lisa to come and bring chatted with director Casey Stangl and actress CS: It has a lot to say. Lauren Gunderson comedy come from? down the house! t Beth Hylton, who plays Marie Antoinette. began work on this play LL: My inspiration comes from the au- For more info, it’s Centerstage.org. Frankie Ku- Viva la prior to last year’s elec- jawa: What can Revolucion! tion. So, it has just grown audiences expect in relevance as far as the from this perfor- idea of “What do we do how many times as actors, we stop and say mance? when we live in a time we can’t believe that we get to do this play right Casey Stangl: I where we disagree with now. It becomes a community exercise on think they can expect our government?” We conversation. There’s also another thing, and to have a fun time, feel marginalized and it’s not necessarily feminist-themed, but right • Family Law • Estate Planning because it’s a come- we feel harassed and now the arts are being threatened. How the dy. But, they can ex- we feel like our basic arts and the telling of stories is valuable to us • Real Estate pect to be moved and rights and way of life and our culture. That’s being threatened in to- Stephanie Cañas Hunnell, Esq. to also be surprised are being threatened. day’s world. And to be in play written by wom- Sylvia L. Breitowich, Esq. how relevant the play “What do we do in a en, with three other women, being helmed by a is to our own time. society that’s going just a bit cra- woman – it’s a very woman empowered room. 408 7th Ave. Beth Hylton: Hilarity, with sadness some- zy?” Our play takes place in 1793, during the And that’s always a delight to play as a woman Asbury Park, NJ 07712 times ensuing. I think Casey really said it well. Reign of Terror. And with the current polariza- artist. 732-749-3500 It’s a very funny play and there are a lot of tion, where we just scream at each other in our For more info on The Revolutionists, visit fax 732-749-3503 surprises in it. It starts as this madcap caper country, this feels particular to what our play Everymantheatre.org. t Monmouth-Divorce.com about the French Revolution, and there’s a lot is dealing with. There is a very female bend of heart to it. The four women are really drawn to it – the reclaiming of women’s history and beautifully with a lot of details. And that pro- telling stories from the times of the past from a vides us with a lot of heartful moments for the female perspective. Olympe – the person who Hearts & Ears, Inc. characters. all these other women orbit around – wants to is a non-profit organization for Gay, FK: Casey, what drew you to this proj- know why can’t revolutions be kind and cre- Lesbian, Bisexual, Transgender, ect as a director? ative. And, I feel that if women were in charge Intersex and Questioning individuals CS: Well a couple of things. It’s great writ- they would be kind and creative. This play ing. Four women characters, you don’t often beckons the question, how have women been with mental health issues get to see that, especially with scenes that silenced and oppressed and how do we break and concerns. are exploring power for women and equality out of it and find solidarity and sisterhood with for women. Aside from Marie, the other three each other and the outside world? We warmly welcome all sexual and characters are what I call “footnotes in history.” BH: When we first read the play, as a Wellness and gender minorities. Charlotte Corday and Olympe de Gouges are company, it was the day after the Women’s Recovery Center Sun. through Tues. Closed actual historical figures that we know nothing March in Washington, DC, and many of us Wed. through Sat. 10 a.m. to 6 p.m about. The fact that it’s usually men that write participated. The play just levitated. It feels as 611 PARK AVENUE SUITE A BALTIMORE, MD 21201 • 410-523-1694 history and men who tell stories – that’s a big if Gunderson wrote this play for just this time. heartsandears.org theme in this play. To reclaim this history and It feels so strangely current, and I can’t tell you

BALTIMORE OUTLOUD DECEmber 8, 2017 • baltimoreoutloud.com t 19 Lively Arts // Between the Covers // Music Lost Prayers of Rickey Graves BSO Brings Holiday Prompts Conversation draft, I just whittled it down to six char- Jingle to New Heights By Brynn Devereaux On acters.” In his debut novel, The Lost Readers never hear from Ricky di- Putting the Baltimore Symphony. This Prayers of Ricky Graves, au- millennial rectly. Mattson only gives us glimpses By Brynn Devereaux orchestra will always hold thor James Han Mattson tackles into Ricky’s mind through chat room Take a break from frantic shopping scintillating a very special place in my several complex issues - a gay gay teens transcripts with his crush, Jeremy. Each and stressful travel prep to enjoy heart,” says Wilkins. “The teen struggling with his sexual- character shares their insights and per- the sounds of the season from the in seasonal opportunity to share some ity, online relationships, mean spective of events in a mix of prose, Baltimore Symphony Orchestra delicious music of the sea- spirited teens, small minded folks, and a transcripts, and email chains. “Ricky was the at the Joseph Meyerhoff Symphony Hall. son with the audiences and make hearts life-altering tragedy. A dramatic cocktail like central focus, but I was more interested to Their holiday programming lineup will give glad – that’s pure bonus!” this has the potential to be overwhelming, but see how people reacted and the aftermath you a shot of the holiday spirit and trans- The Cirque partners with the BSO Mattson skillfully crafts a piece of literature of the event. Ricky is seen differently through form the way you hear those classic tunes. for the Cirque de la Symphonie Holiday that sparks a conversation about the real and each character’s eye. In that way, he gets “The holidays are a time when families Spectacular on December 22nd and 23rd. digital world in which we live, rather than con- fleshed out because each person perceives are together – our programming is created Musicians, acrobats, and aerialists led by demning it. him differently,” says Mattson. with multiple variations and generations in Nicholas Hersh, associate conductor, will “The event that spurred the idea was the The catastrophic event in question is mind,” says Tonya Robles, the BSO’s gen- dazzle audiences as they perform Tyler Clementi case in 2010,” says Mattson. sparked through social media. Throughout eral manager. “We want to present the mu- pieces from The Clementi’s suicide brought national attention the book, characters vacillate between feel- sic of the season in an uplifting, engaging, to the issue of cyberbullying and the strug- ing isolated and ostracized on social media joyful way. Crafting unique twists on fa- gles facing LGBT to cultivating meaningful relationships miliar holiday music produces a memo- youth. “I remember with others. One character in partic- rable experience for the whole family.” reading that story ular, Jeremy’s boyfriend, Craig, fasts On December 16th and 17th, the and feeling sick to from the digital world and criticizes BSO will be joined by Thomas Wilkins, my stomach. A lot everything about it. “[Craig’s] whole principal conductor of the Hollywood of stories make me speech about the ‘digital tapestry of Bowl, and soprano Alison Buchanan feel something, but unanswered prayers’ comes directly for Home for the Holidays. This perfor- not a lot of stories from my thoughts on social media at mance will feature holiday classics as make me feel that that time,” explains Mattson. “I feel like well as a troupe of tap-dancing Santas. physical reaction. I Craig. I feel like I’m being assaulted by “The tap-dancing Santas are a highlight knew I had some- people’s insecurities. It’s about valida- of our holiday programs,” remarks Robles. thing after I read tion and who can get the most likes. It’s “Dancers from the nationally-recognized Nutcracker, The Four about that.” troubling.” Baltimore School for the Arts are selected Seasons, and holiday favorites like Sleigh Early feed- However, Mattson also says that by audition and prepared by a professional Ride. back to the novel the internet can be an incredible tool. “I tap choreographer. This aspect of the pro- “Our program is full of timeless holi- has been glowing. wanted to create a discussion on both duction is reminiscent of the famous Rock- day musical classics (and perhaps a few Mattson says he sides. Social media has done wonder- ettes routine from the Radio City Christ- unexpected surprises), but hearing them was pleasantly ful things. It can give people the oppor- mas Spectacular.” with Cirque makes these familiar tunes a surprised by the tunity to congregate effectively,” says Thomas Wilkins is excited to join the completely new and thrilling experience,” feedback. “People Mattson. “I didn’t want to lambaste the BSO for this performance. “I’m looking for- says Hersh. “These performers do an in- have been kind and have reached out to me internet. It isn’t this thing that turns us into ward to making music again with some of credible job of choreographing their move- to tell me how much the book meant to them. zombies. In some ways, it also helps people my oldest and dearest colleagues of the ments to the music so that they are both People always ask me who I am in the book, reach out.” spontaneous and organic. With a world- and I’m kind of everyone. I inhabit some of After Tyler Clementi’s suicide, the “It Gets class orchestra on stage, the musical and the characteristics as people in the book,” Better Campaign” began. The campaign was work within themselves,” says Mattson. “We visual elements combine into a whole per- says Mattson. “I was an isolated gay teen, designed to help teens realize that the grue- should facilitate that in a bunch of 14 year formance greater than the sum of its parts. and I didn’t have the internet. I don’t think I’m some high school years would end, and life olds rather than inserting ourselves in their Concert goers should feel the holiday spirit like Ricky, but there are things we shared. If would get better. Mattson says that while the lives and say ‘It gets better.’ Make sure they as never before – infused with adrenaline I had grown up with the internet, how would campaign began with the best of intentions, have a supportive social circle. Time for a bul- and awe!” that have changed things? It would be diffi- it is problematic. If you have any empathy for lied kid moves like syrup; it’s torture for hours Home for the Holidays performances cult. Teens are more anxious than we were a 14 year old, telling them to ‘wait and it gets and hours a day.” are Saturday, December 16th at 3 pm and because they curate it and worry about it.” better’ isn’t real nice,” says Mattson. “If I’m In the book, Ricky’s sister says, “It wasn’t 8 pm and Sunday, December 17th at 3 pm. Lost Prayers tells the story of Ricky the 14 year old, I’d say ‘Screw it. What are anyone’s place to make fun of something Cirque de la Symphonie Holiday Spectac- Graves through the eyes of those that sur- you going to do to make it better?’” Instead of someone was truly struggling with, because ular performances are Friday, December round him: family, friends, classmates, and telling a teen that you got through it, so they look: everyone has something very sensitive 22nd at 8 pm and Saturday, December bullies. “It’s very different from where I start- can to, he says that adults need to help coach beneath their outside selves, something they 23rd at 3 pm & 8 pm. All performances ed writing in 2010. As I think about the very teens to actually get through it. won’t talk about to anyone. Secrets.” The Lost will be at the Joseph Meyerhoff Symphony first draft, it was nothing like this,” remarks “I’d talk more to adults to get teens though Prayers of Ricky Graves definitely has secrets, Hall. For more info and tickets, visit BSO- Mattson. “It had 30 characters in this [small] this. I think teenagers influence their peers. and reading about them will hopefully help open music.org or call the box office at 410-783- town, but it was a jumbled mess. With each It’s more important for the kids to build a net- people’s eyes to the world around them. t 8000. t

20 t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD DECEmber 8, 2017 • baltimoreoutloud.com Lively Arts // qmusic

Holy Night / Ave Maria”). Tinsel Tunes 2017 Fiddler and Dancing With the Stars competitor By Gregg Shapiro cludes “Let It Snow!” and a duet with Jen- Stirling bows with her first Leave it to a nice Jewish (bisexual) girl nifer Hudson on “How Great Thou Art.” holiday album Warmer In such as Rachael Sage to come up with As career transformations go, Gwen the Winter (Concord). one of the most delightful holiday re- Stefani’s is one for the record books, so More than half of the cordings of the year. Her five-song EP to speak. Over the course songs are instrumentals Joy! (MPress) opens with a of about 25 years, in which the plucky Stir- reading of “Joy to the Stefani success- ling shows off her ac- World” that is pure fully morphed complished string skill Sage, right down to from the bel- on Christmas standards her distinctive phras- ly-baring lead including “Carol of the ing and vocals. A ra- singer of OC ska Bells,” “I Saw Three dio mix of the songs act No Doubt Ships,” “What Child Is also closes the EP. to full-fledged This,” and even Mari- In between, it’s a fes- diva and fashion ah Carey’s “All I Want tival of lights and light icon. Continu- For Christmas.” What pop. The originals, in- ing the “feels separates this disc cluding the lighthearted like” theme of from the others are Rachael “Tchatchkes & Latkes” her previous the Stirling originals Sage and the beautiful “Ha- studio album, including “Christmas nukkah in the Village,” Stefani’s first C’Mon” (with vocals by Becky G), the ti- the are among Sage’s most Christmas tle track (featuring Trombone Shorty) and Royal Philhar- appealing compositions. album, You “Time To Fall In Love” (sung by Alex Gas- monic Orchestra. Elvis Christmas has The disc’s centerpiece, Make it Feel karth of All Time Low). everything from “Blue Christmas,” “Mer- in which Sage sings Like Christ- Elvis Christmas (RCA / Legacy) is the ry Christmas Baby” and “Santa Bring My in Yiddish, is the song mas (Interscope) combines her latest in a series of Elvis Presley releases Baby Back to Me” to “The First Noel,” “Oh “Umru Meine,” featuring lyrics by interpretation of holiday standards (from in which The King’s songs and recordings Little Town of Bethlehem,” and “O Come, the modernist poet Moyshe-Leyb Halpern. “Silent Night” to “Santa Baby”) along with are reimagined with his vocals backed up by All Ye Faithful.” t The 10th anniversary edition expanded half a dozen new tunes. Thanks to Ste- reissue of Josh Groban’s Noel (Reprise), fani’s gay co-songwriter Justin Tranter, it’s described as “one of the biggest-selling the new tunes, including “My Gift Is You,” OPENING JANUARY 11 Christmas albums of all time,” now boasts “When I Was A Little Girl,” “Under The six additional songs, including four newly Christmas Lights” and “Christmas Eve,” recorded selections. The original 2007 al- that are the real gift here. bum by the classical crossover superstar The 2017 double-disc edition of played it relatively safe with a few excep- Broadway’s Carols for a Cure: Volume tions. A duet with Brian McKnight on “An- 19 (rock-itscience.com) serves a dual gels We Have Heard on High” soars. “I’ll purpose. First and foremost, it’s a bene- Be Home for Christmas” is made more fit for Broadway Cares/Equity Fights AIDS poignant because of the inclusion of hol- (broadwaycares.org). Secondly, the 20 iday greetings from soldiers and their selections give listeners a chance to hear families. “Thankful,” co-written by Carole artists from some of Broadway’s hottest Bayer Sager, is the newest of the original tickets – including Hamilton, Dear Evan disc’s compositions. Of the newly record- Hansen, Kinky Boots, War Paint, Ground- ed songs, the duet with Tony Bennett on hog Day, Anastasia, Waitress, to mention Vince Guaraldi’s “Christmas Time Is Here” a few, perform traditional and new Christ- and John Lennon and Yoko Ono’s “Happy mas songs. Xmas (War is Over),” on which Groban is This Christmas, the Latter Days Saints joined by a children’s choir, are especially have a leg up, as well as a piano, a cello pleasing. and a violin, on the competition. Mormon A cappella outfit Pentatonix are the musical acts The Piano Guys and Lind- new reigning kings and queens of holiday sey Stirling have newly released holiday music, topping the Christmas (records) albums. On “Angels From the Realms of list for the last three years. The quartet’s Glory,” the opening number on The Piano platinum-selling 2016 album has been re- Guys’ Christmas Together (Portrait) al- issued with five new songs and retitled A bum, they are joined by fellow LDS mem- Pentatonix Christmas Deluxe (RCA). In bers David Archuleta and the Mormon Tab- addition to interesting renditions of “Up on ernacle Choir and Orchestra, as well as 410-730-8311 TobysDinnerTheatre.com HURRY! the Housetop,” as well as covers of Kanye Peter Hollens. Other guest artists on the Tickets are Going FAST! West’s “Coldest Winter” and Nsync’s “Mer- album include Placido Domingo (“Silent ry Christmas, Happy Holidays” from the Night, Holy Night”), The King’s Singers Due to the nature of theatrical bookings, all shows and dates are subject to change. • Toby’s Dinner Theatre, Columbia, MD previous version, the expanded edition in- (“O Little One Sweet”) and Lexi Walker (“O

BALTIMORE OUTLOUD DECEmber 8, 2017 • baltimoreoutloud.com t 21 Lively Arts // screen savor

Funny, violent, and loud, the terribly-titled Jackson), a universally feared contract killer, Kiss Kiss Bang Bang “unlikely buddy” movie The Hitman’s Body- who must be transported from Manchester, guard (Summit / Millennium) is surprisingly England, where he is serving time, to the By Gregg Shapiro several scenes), an Irishman who is initially entertaining, if about 20 minutes too long. Netherlands within 27 hours so that he may Remember in the 1980s when Sting wanted hired to clean the club. Little does he know Impeccably-groomed executive protec- testify against Dukhovich. Of course, there to be a movie star, appearing in films such that he’ll be cleaning more messes than the tion agent Michael’s (Ryan Reynolds) career is a virtual army of Dukhovich’s henchmen as Brimstone & Treacle, Dune, The Bride, ones in the men’s room. as head of AAA Protection Services comes doing everything in their power to make sure and even alongside Meryl Streep in Plenty? After Kate and Brendan meet cute, un- to an abrupt end when a that doesn’t happen. The caravan transport- Heck, even Melanie Griffith wanted to be an aware they are actually high-profile client is as- ing Darius is attacked by mercenaries, and actress in the 80s. on opposites sides of the sassinated, regardless he and Interpol agent Amelia (Elodie Yung) Sting and Griffith co-starred in 1988’s playing field, they begin a of all of the precau- are the only survivors. It’s then that, you Stormy Monday (Arrow Video / Icon), the relationship. Before long tions taken. Still main- guessed it, Amelia enlists her ex-boyfriend feature-length film debut from writer/director everything comes to the taining a professional Michael to assist in the mission of getting her Mike Figgis (the Oscar-winning Leaving Las surface and Kate sees the demeanor (if you can high-value charge to his destination. Vegas). With a jazzy score befitting its title, error of her ways, switch- overlook his reeking Along the way we are introduced a vari- Stormy Monday is the gritty tale of homopho- ing sides to be with Bren- beater of a car), Mi- ety of characters, with the most interesting bic, Trump-like ugly American businessman dan. But there will be a high chael is reduced to among them being Darius’s foul-mouthed Cosmo (Tommy Lee Jones) who arrives in cost as guns are drawn and taking on less profit- wife Sonia (Salma Hayek, who steals every depressed Thatcher-era Newcastle during bombs are set off killing in- able assignments. scene in which she appears), who is also in what is billed as “America week.” Cosmo nocent people. Meanwhile in prison. Michael and Darius, who also have a promises to bring change and prosperity The timing of the spe- Belarus, maniacal, complicated past, eventually overcome most which means there will be shady backroom cial edition DVD/Blu-ray of brutal leader and of their differences during the course of sev- deals being made at any cost. Among Cos- Stormy Monday couldn’t be facially disfigured eral lengthy fight and chase scenes. mo’s potential victims is Finney (Sting), own- better with everything swirl- Dukhovich (a scen- If seeing a scruffy Reynolds in body-hug- er of jazz venue The Key Club. ing around Brexit, as well a s ery-chomping Gary Oldman), whose spe- ging suits isn’t enough for you, then watch On Cosmo’s team is spiky-haired (it was Trump’s meteoric/catastrophic rise from cialty is ethnic cleansing, wreaks havoc on and enjoy The Hitman’s Bodyguard for the 80s!) American redhead and part-time bombastic real estate mogul to POTUS. Bo- those who defy him. The good news is he’s Hayek’s hilarious performance. DVD special waitress Kate (Griffith). Playing for team Fin- nus features include audio commentary by about to be put on trial at The Hague for his features include commentary by director Pat- ney is Brendan (Sean Bean when he was Figgis, a “then and now” look at the Newcas- crimes against humanity. rick Hughes and the featurette “Big Action in young and hot enough to be half-naked in tle locales and more. One key witness is Darius (Samuel L. a Big World.” t

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22 t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD DECEmber 8, 2017 • baltimoreoutloud.com out in the valley

Parenting OUTloud Rev. Kelly Crenshaw Taking Care of my time in a number of non-profit groups. Mom (or Dad) People who know me ask where I find Our job as parents is to teach our children the energy. To be honest, I don’t know. What how to be successful adults. That’s it. And, Admit it! No matter how much you love I do know is that I enjoy being busy. And, to do that successfully, we need to be able your kids, it’s not healthy to concentrate I have found to show our kids that we are successful on them every moment of every day. I can adults. Indulging in our own interests is already hear the groans of some of you. part of that process. “Why have kids if you don’t devote your life So, take some time to indulge your- to them?” And, I agree – one hundred per- self. Maybe that means you go to the gym cent. I also think that some time devoted to every morning. It might mean that you go Rev. Kelly Crenshaw is the mom of 16 your own interests makes for a much more out with friends without the kids once in adopted kids, two biological kids, guardian interesting and able parent. a while. And, like me, it could mean that of one baby girl and foster mom of dozens. I know you’ve seen those parents you take a long weekend off from work and Some are lesbian, some gay, some straight, whose lives revolve around their kids. spend it doing things you enjoy. and some bisexual. Kelly founded a K-12 Their friends are the parents of their kids’ Whatever taking care of yourself day school where kids could have a safe, friends. Their activities are their kids’ ac- means to you is what you should do. You’ll bully-free environment for learning. She is tivities. They spend so much time being return a happier, healthier parent than you co-owner of a counselling agency that works involved that their identities are defined by were before. t with children and their families. it. And, I know you’ve seen those parents who barely know their kids’ names. They are the ones who never show up at dance recitals or ball games. I propose that there is a happy medium. And, it sometimes takes work to achieve that medium status. I’m one of those moms that struggles to find the middle of the road. My kids have required so much time and attention. It takes time to go to all the doctor, psy- that no Mommy’s “No matter how much matter how much I try to hour make everyone happy, you love your kids, there’s always room to find fault. it’s not healthy to Another thing I discovered some years concentrate on them ago, is that I’m much more effective if I take time for myself. So today, I’m sitting every moment of every in our beach house. This is an annual trip for me. I come to do some Christmas shop- day. Some time devoted ping at the outlets. I come to get a break to your own interests from the day-to-day routine. And, for me, it has become a necessity makes for a much more It’s important to be involved in your children’s lives. You need to show them interesting and able support and know their friends. And, ev- parent.” ery so often, it’s important to take time for yourself. It’s important to do things that make you a more interesting person and chiatric, therapy, and legal appointments, keep your spirits high. Because, no matter and that doesn’t even include the extra- how you do it, there will come a day when curricular activities. I’m an overachiever by your children will leave home and start to nature, so I have also worked long hours, live their own lives. gone to graduate school, and volunteered That’s what they’re supposed to do.

BALTIMORE OUTLOUD DECEmber 8, 2017 • baltimoreoutloud.com t 23 out in the valley

Beyond with family in another state, and I entered Brian’s Black Friday with a sense of good will for the Ice gender, identity, and self-confidence. (Pre- my fellow man that I often strive for but school through grade 2) find difficult to achieve in busy stores with I am Jazz by Jazz Jennings (Dial Books, Brain Machine 2014). The real-life story told by a young Brian George Hose harsh fluorescent lighting. L:aura Anderson So, what happened to cause this transgender girl. A great way to start the change? I began to notice how the holi- discussion. (Grades 1 or 2 through 5 or 6). day spirit, the spirit of generosity and all Books as Gifts For young adults A Cure For things good, was backfiring and bringing out the worst in people. This is nothing Being Jazz: My Life as a (Transgen- new, as anyone who’s ever worked re- As we search for those special gifts this der) Teen by Jazz Jennings (Ember, 2017). Holiday tail will be quick to tell you, but this year time of year, books may provide the perfect Follow the journey of Jazz as she encoun- seems to have a different feel to it. I be- answer – especially if you, your family, or ters the difficulties Cynicism gan to wonder if this is the result of the friends are working through transgender is- of not only being a politically divisive climate we’ve lived in for sues. For trans children or children of trans- teen, but also be- the better part of a year; a constant, subtle gender relatives, books help to show an ing transgender The holiday season can be a tricky time of influence that tells us to put ourselves and understanding of gender and what it means through adoles- the year. Yes, it’s a season of giving and our needs before anyone else’s. This is, in to be trans. Young adults will find positive cence. (Grades 5 togetherness, of sharing good times, good fact, the opposite of the holiday spirit and role models with whom they can relate. For – 10). food, and gifts with those we care about, the source of my holiday cynicism. parents and adults, books offer a source of Gracefully and these are all wonderful things. But all I had almost given in to this cynical guidance and support. Grayson by Ami this comes at a price. It takes planning, way of thinking when it occurred to me that Listed here are some of the many books Polonsky (Dis- organizing, budgeting, and usually some this problem is what the holiday spirit is all available that may be especially suitable for ney-Hyperion, amount of baking to successfully navi- about. It’s easy to be sweet and gift-giving. The age recommendations are 2016). Sixth-grad- gate the holidays. It’s enough to kind to those we know merely guides. er Grayson has stress out even the most and care about, but de- been holding onto “perfect” Martha Stew- cidedly more difficult to For children a secret for what arts among us. Even if do so with strangers. To Red: A Crayon’s Story by Michael Hall seems like forev- you don’t observe the hol- me, the holiday season (Greenwillow Books, 2015). This is a won- er. On the inside, Grayson knows ‘he’ is a idays, all this is happening is about acknowledging derful book to share with any child. There girl – but everyone sees Grayson as a boy. around you and usually and appreciating that is no mention of This is a story of struggle and pain to which demands some sort of par- we’re all doing the best gender or of being any transgender child can relate – a story of ticipation – or worse, an we can with what we trans. Simply, it is an unexpected friend and the strength of a explanation of the intensely have. It’s about remem- the story of a blue caring teacher. (Grades 4 through 8) personal reasons as to why bering that the shopper crayon mistaken- The Other Boy by M.G. Hennessey you don’t want to make mer- who ran over your foot ly labeled as red. (HarperCollins, 2016). Twelve-year-old ry the same way as everyone with their cart is a per- Many young read- Shane is like any other boy at his school else. son, just like you, with ers will make the and everyone sees him as such. Yet, Shane Sometimes it seems that their own strengths connections. (Any is keeping a huge secret that if revealed all the good will and cheer in and weaknesses, age) may change everything – Shane is a trans- the world aren’t enough to bal- and putting aside Introducing gender boy who has socially transitioned. ance out the stress involved in animosity in favor Teddy: A Gentle If his friends and teammates discover the shopping on a budget, finding of forgiveness. It’s Story about Gen- truth how will his life change? Another per- the perfect gift, and braving the about wishing good der and Friendship by J. Walton (Blooms- spective on the transgender experience. crowds of strangers all trying things for others bury USA Children’s Books, 2016). The title (Grades 4 through 8) to accomplish their own to-do A lump of and sharing kindness because says it all. A great evening read aloud. (Pre- Symptoms of Being Human by Jeff lists. Factor in current events – coal for you, this reminds us of how much better school through grade 2) Garvin (Balzer-Bray, 2016) Gender is not like changes to the tax code that sir the world could be if we set aside our Who Are You?: The Kid’s Guide to just male or female – one’s identity can be nobody seems to fully know or un- differences and focus on the com- Gender Identity by Brook Pessin-Whed- dynamic and anywhere along the gender derstand, increasing momentum mon good. bee and Naomi Bardoff (Jessica Kingsley spectrum. Riley identifies as gender-fluid – in the Russia investigations, con- If you’re like me and struggling Publishers, 2016). A simple, caring, and anywhere and everywhere across the spec- tinuing allegations and investigations into with a cynical holiday disposition, allow direct intro to gender – what it is and what trum. A refreshing and unusual look at the sexual misconduct and abuse – and it may me to share a technique that almost al- it may mean to each of us. (Preschool many challenges of yet another aspect of seem that no one is going to have a happy ways helps: Look for ways to be thankful, through early grades) being trans. (Grades 8 through 12) holiday season this year. then express your gratitude. If an employ- Jacob’s New Dress by Sarah Hoff- Rethinking Normal: A Memoir in Tran- To be clear, I’m surprised by my own ee helps you find the gift you’re looking man and Ian Hoffman (Albert Whitman sition by Katie Rain Hill (Simon & Schuster cynicism Just a few days ago I was flying for, look them in the eye, smile, and thank & Company, 2014). This is the story of a Books for Young Readers, 2015). There high through clouds of cinnamon-scented them for their help. Unlike money, we all gender-expansive boy who desperately are few transgender memoirs for and about air that mysteriously seem to permeate have an infinite supply of kindness at our wants to wear a dress to school. Jacob ex- teens – this is one that will take the reader from every retail establishment this time disposal; and, the more we give away, the periences the pain so many young trans- along the perilous road of being trans and of year. I had a great Thanksgiving, spent more we get back. t gender children must face to ultimately what it really means to be “normal.” (Grades be themselves. Fosters discussions of 8 through 12)

24 t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD DECEmber 8, 2017 • baltimoreoutloud.com out in the valley The Leading Lady of Rodeo Being Emily by Rachel Gold (Bella By Frankie Kujawa Tuckness and her partner Sande Miller. They until she assumed the role of trustee. She was Books, 2012) The story of Chris, a high Oftentimes at the mention of the word rodeo told me that I needed to learn how to rope be- inducted into the IGRA Hall of Fame in 2009, school senior (who becomes Emily) and mental images of blue-jeaned, mud-splat- cause to be eligible to be the All Around [title- and was awarded the Grand Marshall at this Clair, a friend who helped her along the tered male wranglers usually come to mind. holder] you must complete in three out of four year’s IGRA finals. way. Not only do we see the transition of International Gay Rodeo Association (IGRA) categories, but place in at least two. It was Most recently, Pratt took on the charge Chris to Emily, but we also witness a trans- president Candy Pratt, however, doesn’t just then, in 1991, that I went to the Wichita finals. as president of the International Gay formation in Claire and Emily’s parents – a surpass that misconception, she shatters it. I was sitting in the crowd for awards and when Rodeo Associ- story of struggle, pain, and hope. (Grades Born in Dallas, and raised in Irving, Tex- they called me up. I had earned my first All 9 and up) as, Pratt has been involved with IGRA for Around Cowgirl award, which is much harder over the last 28 years. Her tireless work ethic, to achieve at finals.” For parents and other adults competitive spirit and positive heart are Since then Pratt has now won The Transgender Child: A Handbook what helped her to personify the West- Candy Pratt 100 rodeo all around titles, her hun- for Families and Professionals by Steph- ern lifestyle that IGRA promotes in all its and her dredth was awarded this year at IG- anie A. Brill and Rachel Pepper (Cleis competitors. horse Wyatt RA’s milestone 500th rodeo at Best Press, 2008). Useful and especially easy For Pratt, it all began when she was Buck in the Bay. Additionally, she to read. This is definitely one of the “go to” eight years old. “I won her 12th IGRA All Around books for anyone working with transgender was in third grade Cowgirl title this year in the Albu- youth. and my parents querque rodeo finals. The Transgender Teen: A Handbook bought me a pony.” It was during a convention for Parents and Professionals Support- Pratt explained ex- in Minnesota that Pratt met her ation through December ing Transgender and Non-Binary Teens clusively to Baltimore future partner, Doreen. “We 2018. Overseeing the many local associa- by Stephanie A. Brill and Lisa Kenney (Cleis OUTloud. “I grew up met at the rodeo there and we tions throughout the country, Pratt’s dedica- Press, 2016). in the city, in Irving, but will have been together for 25 tion and laser focus will help to propel IGRA to The Trans Partner Handbook: A Guide we boarded my pony years this 2018,” she says. the heights of success. Continuing the IGRA’s for When Your Partner Transitions by Jo outside of town. On Pratt explained that she and mission of providing family-friendly events, Green (Jessica Kings- weekends, we would Doreen do compete against her focus is to build recognition of contestants ley Publishers, 2017). go out there and I would each other in different rodeos and audience participation throughout the ro- Partners and spouses take part in playdays.” held throughout the country. deos. Along with audience entertainment and are often overlooked in Playdays are informal “It goes really well competing interaction, Pratt continues to lead the charge the tumultuous time of competitions featur- against each other. We’re into 2018 by fostering new rodeo contestants a transition. Here is a ing speed events and each other’s biggest fans.” through mentoring programs, enhancing ro- guide to help partners games. Adding with a laugh, “It all deo productions, and securing sponsorships. try to understand what “I met a bunch of kids goes to the same bank ac- With her focus and drive, Pratt’s dedication to is happening as they there, and my parents count. We both cheer each the rodeo will help IGRA soar to the heights of are also drawn into the came to watch me,” Pratt other on.” success this upcoming 2018 year. transition of a signifi- recalled, “My dad was very Pratt, who works out- Save the date for the local 2018 IGRA ro- cant-other and, indeed, a competitive. He was a re- side the rodeo circuit full deo: The Keystone State Charity Rodeo, June transition of their own. Contains numerous ally good football player, time in the corporate 22nd through 24th, 2018, in Harrisburg, Penn- accounts from others who have travelled this and he was even drafted world, has a long-storied sylvania. The Keystone State Charity Rodeo journey offering advice and support. for minor league baseball. history with the IGRA. She had been a is a family-friendly unique rodeo experience. He didn’t get out of the mi- nor leagues delegate at many IGRA conventions, served Men, women, members of the LGBTQ com- Finally because they wanted him to be a catcher, and on the Rodeo Rules committee, and as a munity, and their straight allies will be compet- True Selves: Understanding Trans- he didn’t want to be. He wanted better for me. trustee. In 2003, she founded the Red River ing equally in all rodeo events. For more info, sexualism – For Families, Friends, Co- He saw this little pony that really couldn’t run Rodeo Association and served as president it’s Ksgra.org and Igra.com. t workers, and Helping Professionals by that well and he thought, ‘I need to get my Mildred L. Brown and Chloe Ann Rounsley daughter a better one.’ From there I did high (Jossey-Bass, 2003). This is truly a classic school rodeos and eventually I would go on HIV Testing Services: – although written in 2003 it remains quite to win 12 world-championship titles in several relevant as a book to share with family and well-known horse associations throughout the Easy, Fast and Free friends of anyone about to transition. It puts US.” Serving our LGBT Friends into words many of the things we might find In 1988, Pratt saw an advertisement in in a comfortable, welcoming environment difficult to express ourselves. t Fort Worth for what would become her first Laura Anderson is an educator, author, gay rodeo. “I was surprised because I didn’t researcher, parent, and granddad. Her years even know there was such a thing,” Pratt ex- Providing referrals for PrEP in Frederick County teaching in public school classrooms as male plained. “So, I went to my very first one and provided the foundation for her more recent the rest was history. I didn’t know all these Call 301-600-3342 for an appointment role educating future teachers. Living female other events, such as the camp events and for the past decade, she has come to appre- rope events. I just knew how to do flags and Frederick County Health Department ciate the privileges she once held – both male barrels.” 350 Montevue Lane, Entrance B, Frederick, MD 21702 and cisgender – privileges now replaced with Pratt continued, “I continued to go for the fulfillment of living as her true self. the next few years, and then I met Murmur BALTIMORE OUTLOUD DECEmber 8, 2017 • baltimoreoutloud.com t 25 out & ABOUT // David’s Thoughts Call it ‘curvitechture’

largest food distributors and is known for its Pocky (biscuit sticks covered in choco- Awesome | Osaka late frosting). Across from that famous billboard is the Asahi beer billboard. Its lights change color frequently, capturing the Urban eyes of tourists. The Riverwalk is crowded by David Placher ecstacy Traveling from Tokyo at nights, especially during the weekends. to Osaka by bullet train A romantic waterside scenery stroll would is about three hours not be recom- and the train ride takes Japan’s mended on a you through Japan’s Friday or Sat- beautiful countryside. 3rd biggest urday night. Osaka is a large port Doyama is city located in the city boasts the district in southern center of Ja- Osaka where pan. It’s Japan’s third stunning a vast majority most populated city of the gay bars and is a major eco- architecture & are located. nomic area. Although it Gram Slam is was heavily destroyed unique eats a popular vid- during World War II, it eo gay bar that was rebuilt and recov- has regular dance parties and offers strong and nightclub that is popular with young- ered quickly. Osaka’s drinks. It plays the latest music –Asian and er crowds. G Physique Osaka is an inter- nickname is Tenka no the oldest in Japan. Even though the Jap- North American – with their videos. Explo- national gay bar that is very popular with Daidokoro (nation’s kitchen) because of anese government later moved the capital sion is a small basement-style gay dance foreigners. It offers nightly events and a its reputation as a foodie’s paradise and to Nagaoka-kyo (Kyoto), then to Heijo-kyo club that has drag shows and featured relaxing atmosphere. Cafe de Jumpin’ is a its food exports to other countries and to (the city of Nara), then Heian-kyo to (Kyo- DJs. PumpUpBar is a neighborhood gay gay bar that is popular for people to go to other cities in Japan. Regional dishes in- to), then to Kamakura, and finally to Edo bar that has several different events each before they visit the dance clubs. Diva is a clude okonomiyaki (pan-fried batter cake), (Tokyo), Osaka continued to new gay bar that is managed by a trans- takoyaki (octopus in fried batter), udon (a be the gateway for foreign gender mama. LuPu is a bar that is owned noodle dish), and oshizushi (pressed su- trade. and operated by a lesbian couple and is shi). During the 14th century, a popular for happy hour. Hysterics is a Osaka’s downtown has awesome ar- Osaka was devastated by gay bar that has younger crowds, mostly chitecture, with several unique skyscrap- a series of wars. The Mur- in their 20s. It is known for keeping up with ers. Many South Koreans and Chinese vis- omachi Period (1336-1573) the current trends in music and often has produced Nobunaga Oda, a theme nights throughout the week. Kuro powerful warlord, who cap- is a gay bar that has a more profession- Started tured Osaka because of its al crowd. Osaka does not have an LGBT it all waterways. His successor, community center, but the Asia-Pacific Hu- Times Square – man Rights Information Center (Hurights. eputedly the very Hideyoshi Toyotomi, another or.jp/english) offers LGBT info on Osaka. intergalactic belly warlord, unified Japan from Although many American tourists skip button! his base in Osaka. As Ja- pan entered the Edo Period Osaka, it’s a city that should be on every- t (1601-1867), the capital was one’s destination list. moved to Edo (Tokyo). No matter how often the power shifted in Japan, Osaka still remained and remains a major economic week. It is a great place to hub. meet before clubbing. K’s Today, the Tonbori Riverwalk is an Hill is a gay bar that has it Osaka each year while many Americans iconic and bustling riverfront that has over karaoke and has a DJ on usually just visit Tokyo. Osaka is known for 30 stores, open-air cafes, and restaurants several nights. (K’s Hill is its role in Japan’s wild capital and political that edge it. The restaurants serve most- also a nonsmoking bar, power shifts, its Riverwalk, and shopping ly fish and many have minimum purchase uncommon in Japan.) Bar (an estimated 30,000 retail shops in Osa- requirements, some even Bacchus is ka) – and its nightlife, especially for the charge a seating fee. The a gay bar LGBT community. walk along the river takes that offers Osaka’s origins began sometime you past several Las Ve- inexpensive around the fifth century. Because of its gas-style billboards with drinks and ports and its vast riverways, it became a awesome light displays. A a cozy at- gateway into Japan for visitors from other popular billboard is Glico, mosphere. parts of Asia. In 645 AD, Emperor Kotoku which is close to the his- Jack in the On the moved the capital from Asuka (Nara) to toric Ebisubashi Bridge. Box is a styl- make Osaka. He built the Naniwanomiya Palace, Glico is one of Japan’s ish gay bar 26 t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD DECEmber 8, 2017 • baltimoreoutloud.com quality of life

such a substantial bequest, Diana’s attorney havoc – financially and emotionally – for the should have included the personal property in party who correctly abides by the court or- the will itself. Because a will is enforceable, the der. The Law godchildren could then have sued if they didn’t The Law What is a modification? A modification is & You receive their allotted share. & You a request that the court modify a previous Lee Carpenter Unlike Heath Ledger or Princess Diana, Atty. Valerie E. Anias court order as a result of various changes the singer Prince left behind no will at all. In such as one parent moving, losing a job, the aftermath of his death in 2016, some 45 getting a substantial promotion, abuse, etc. The Cost of Not people came forward claiming to be heirs to The most important element of a modifica- his estate. One of them was a prison inmate Contempt & tion is that there must be a material change Having who said he was Prince’s son (a DNA test in circumstance. A parent getting a new job An Up- proved otherwise). Modifications but maintaining a similar salary or moving to A Minnesota judge has since determined another home in the same neighborhood are to-Date that Prince’s $200 million estate should go to You’ve gotten divorced or filed suit for cus- generally not considered a material change his sister and five half-siblings in equal shares. tody and support, the judge made his or her in circumstance. Estate Plan The judge has given the denied parties a year determination and you received a court order In those situations where there has been to appeal his decision, which only means outlining that decision. What happens when a material change in circumstance such as What did Heath Ledger, Princess Diana, and more anxiety and legal costs before anyone one person decides not to listen? What one parent has received a significant raise, the singer Prince all have in common? Each of receives an inheritance. happens if one person loses their job? Cir- has moved far them died with a botched estate plan – or none Each of us can learn from the estate-plan- cumstances change especially for those Some legal away, or has at all – and they cost their families a fortune in ning mistakes of these celebrities. The prob- families who divorced while their children started a relation- money and grief as a result. lems they left behind can be easily avoided by were young. terms you’ll ship with a ques- The shock of Heath Ledger’s death from taking a few simple steps: What is contempt? Contempt is when tionable person, a drug overdose in 2008 was compounded First, call an estates and trusts attorney one party decides to act in contradiction of want to know! then there may by the discovery that his will left nothing to his who understands your concerns and will take the court or court order. The very purpose be cause to re- only child, Matilda. Heath had prepared his will steps to avoid a dispute after you are gone. of receiving a court order is to once and – ceive the modification. When these material before Matilda was born, and the Australian Ideally, the attorney should be a member of hopefully – for all settle a dispute between changes occur, the Court can then evaluate actor never updated the document to provide the LGBT community. the parties. Unfortunately, that doesn’t al- whether the original order is still in the best for her. Second, have him prepare ways happen. That intentional decision to interests of your child. The implications an estate plan that takes your ignore or act inconsistently with a court or- Contempt & modifications – Some- were heartbreaking. circumstances and family dy- der is important because it qualifies the con- times contempt proceedings turn into a mod- Heath’s father would in- namics into account. A will or tempt as willful. Being in willful contempt of ification. For example, perhaps a parent is herit the entire $16 mil- trust should be the backbone a court order can have serious ramifications. refusing to communicate with another par- lion estate, but Matil- of your plan, but other docu- The contempt-ing party may be subject to a ent regarding their child’s school or medi- da, who was only 2 Don’t ments, like a durable power of fine, attorney fees, and in serious cases, jail. cal information. The may find that parent in at the time, would re- be Princess attorney and advance health- The contempt-ing party also creates var- contempt but may also modify in court the ceive nothing. Then, Diana care directive are equally im- ious consequences for the other party. For previous Order to provide the other parent in a surprising turn of portant. example, say a provision of the order re- with sole legal custody. Frequently parties events, Heath’s fa- Third, with the attorney’s quires Parent A to pay one-half of private see that with a contempt comes a modifica- t ther decided to give guidance, follow up on oth- school tuition to the school directly and Par- tion. the entire estate to Matilda, er items, like updating the ent A refuses to pay. If Parent A refuses to ensuring that his grand- beneficiaries named on pay their share of the child’s private tuition daughter would be provid- your life insurance policies than Parent B may have to come out-of- ed for. He had no obligation and retirement accounts. pocket for the balance and, if they can’t, their to do this, and Heath could It is often essential that child may not be able to return the following have prevented the stress items like these be taken year. These and similar situations wreak and uncertainty involved by up- care of in order for an estate plan to be fully dating his will when Matilda was born. effective. Princess Diana’s will was more up-to-date Fourth, keep everything up to date. Call than Heath Ledger’s, but it contained a serious your lawyer if there is anyone new in your life, Law Office of David M. Lutz, P.A. flaw. Diana had placed too much faith in her like a partner, spouse, or child, or if someone executors to carry out her instructions. The will named in your plan has died. was accompanied by a “statement of wishes,” Finally, take comfort in knowing that a le- •Auto Accidents •Workers’ Compensation which said that three-fourths of her personal gal battle won’t be part of your legacy. Instead, property should go to her sons, Prince William your lifetime of accumulated wealth will pass •Personal Injury •DUI/DWI and Prince Harry, and rest to her 17 godchil- efficiently to the people you care about most.t dren. (Personal property includes household Lee Carpenter is an associate attorney •Criminal Defense •Traffic Court items like clothes, silver, china, and furniture.) at the law firm of Semmes, Bowen & Sem- The problem with using a “statement of mes and can be reached at 410-576-4729 or Se Habla Español wishes” is that it’s not legally enforceable. [email protected]. Learn more about 1901 Fleet Street Baltimore, MD 21231 Knowing this, Diana’s executors gave the LGBT estate planning at Mdlgbtestateplan- Phone: 410-558-3700 (English) 410-299-2898(Español) godchildren one small trinket each, to the sur- ning.com. This article is intended to provide E-mail: [email protected] www.lawlutz.com prise and dismay of the children’s parents. For general information, not specific legal advice. BALTIMORE OUTLOUD DECEmber 8, 2017 • baltimoreoutloud.com t 27 DINING OUT

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rial Court Cookie Dennis B. Childs Von this contest moves along and emcee Do- Shigglesworth, Mr. Eagle NYC 2017 John- minion Onyx did an outstanding job keep- Mr. DC Eagle John Punki, and International Community ing the contestants moving through and fellow Leather Bootblack 2017 boy john urso. The tally the categories. The titleholders Line master was the co-producer of DC Leather contestants had Rodney Burger Pride and twice first runner-up for the Mr. been interviewed DC Eagle title Kyle Collins. The contest earlier in the day by was produced by American Leatherman the judges (40% of 2015 / Mr. DC Eagle 2015 Dan Ronneberg total scores), and Mr. and the DC Eagle. onstage appeared This was the fourth time the contest in barware (10%), was held at the bar’s current location (at physique/jock with 2018 is... 3701 Benning Road NE) and I’m not really a brief question DC Eagle sure what the issue was this year. This is based on informa- the longest running leather contest in the tion provided on Daniel T. Ferguson from Washington, DC, country and not only does the winner go the contestant’s was named Mr. DC Eagle 2018 during the on to represent the DC leather community application (15%), annual contest held on November 18th at the International Mr. Leather Contest in and appeared in at Washington’s historic leather bar. First Chicago in May, but two past Mr. DC Eagle formal leather runner-up was Juaniorex Cemicaonani titleholders have been awarded leather’s while delivering a member of Washington’s Highwaymen biggest title. Don’t get me wrong. It was still a brief speech TNT leather club. There were no additional a good contest, but there were five contes- (35%). There contestants. tants for DC Eagle 2017 and five forM r. DC was no filler en- The judges for Mr. DC Eagle 2018 were Eagle 2016. Why only two this year? Also tertainment be- Mr. DC Eagle 2017 Grey Owl, Leatherman the crowd appeared to be about one-third tween segments, of Color 2016 Khalid El Bey, general man- the size of last year. One couldn’t blame the so the contes- ager of the Baltimore Eagle Charles King, weather, it was unseasonably mild. I must tants had to change quickly. Both con- president of the Centaur MC Todd White, admit I was a little disappointed. testants spoke passionately about becom- Empress V from Washington, DC’s Impe- I am never disappointed in how quickly ing Mr. DC Eagle. Juaniorex described the DC Eagle as “a safe space that supports titleholder. The Mr. DC Eagle 2018 contest everyone” and Daniel started his speech was just the centerpiece of a weekend full with a question: “Why is it that you come of events to celebrate the 46th anniversary to the DC Eagle?” and went on to describe of DC’s famous leather bar. The popular how he discovered his people, found a Eagle Wings charity gear auction was held community, and is now ready to give back. on Friday, November 17th and the High- There was also much passion is the way TNT hosted a victory dinner for the step aside speech of Mr. DC Eagle 2017 new Mr. DC Eagle on Sunday, November Grey Owl. (I also most note that from 19th. It is so wonderful to see that the tra- now on when someone googles “work the ● Elder Law stage,” Grey Owl’s picture should pop up.) “From now on when Grey spoke of the importance of inclusion ● Estate Planning in the leather community and how events someone googles ‘work ● Family Law and play spaces should be assessable to the stage,’ Grey Owl’s ● Guardianship everyone. (It was a little ironic that as he gave his wonderful speech there wasn’t an picture should pop up.” ● Mediation ASL interpreter on stage as there usual- ● Medicaid Planning & Qualification ly has been. I was aware of at least one ditions of the old DC Eagle bars continue deaf person in the audience and I’m sure at this location. There is a club bar com- ● Personal Injury there were more.) Grey also spoke about plete with beer mugs for the various leath- ● Probate bullying and the role of social media not- er clubs so that everyone feels at home. (I ing: “Social media is ever so poisonous. have my ShipMate mug there!) There are ● Veteran's Benefits Be above it. Don’t be the poison, be the two outside decks and lots of space in the ● LGBTQIA Matters antidote.” 16,000-square-foot industrial building that Mr. DC Eagle 2018 wasted no time once housed a slaughterhouse. The DC Call ERA Law Group Today with his new title and help host a toy drive Eagle has that gritty feel of a true leath- (410) 919-1790, or visit us at and fundraiser at the Atlanta Eagle over er bar. Make plans to visit the DC Eagle 1997 Annapolis Exchange Pkwy, the Thanksgiving weekend and co-spon- soon. As Mr. DC Eagle 2018 Daniel T. Fer- Suite 300, Annapolis, MD 21401 sored with Dominion Oynx and DC Leather guson so exquisitely put it, the DC Eagle Pride a Kink 101 event entitled “Beyond is a friendly home for the area’s leather the Cheeks, Impact & Insertable Play” on community. I hope that the bar’s 47th year Valerie E. Anias, Esq. December 7th at the Trick Box in Wash- will bring many more wonderful memories. [email protected] ington. I’m sure this is just the start of a Congratulations to Mr. DC Eagle 2018. t very busy title year for DC’s newest leather 30 t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD DECEmber 8, 2017 • baltimoreoutloud.com 870 Park Ave. Baltimore 410-539-4993 227227 W.W. ChaseChase StSt 410-539-4850 Leon’s Backroom Great place to watch the Ravens Games - FREE Wieners! 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34 t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD DECEmber 8, 2017 • baltimoreoutloud.com BALTIMORE OUTLOUD DECEmber 8, 2017 • baltimoreoutloud.com t 35 HEALTH AND SEX BELONG TOGETHER

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36 t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD DECEmber 8, 2017 • baltimoreoutloud.com