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'Uighter MOMENTS R.AJYA SABHA

'Uighter MOMENTS R.AJYA SABHA

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'uIGHTER MOMENTS IN Tf.'.E R.AJYA SABHA

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1st Impression .July, 1985 Humour in Parliament makes an Reprint August, 1985 interesting subject of study. In parliamentary democracy based on party system. Parliament often functions under great stress and strain and the atmosphere in the House for part of the day remains 1',::;.>";).S:;,~haLbnu . surcharged. But even in the midst of '., _ hS87 confrontation. one comes across instances of f. :':. ;~. II (6 . wit, wisdom. and amusing remarks. Most of L 0 .1; ...... • -" •••••• .. :. " jO,I).8-lj these are made in a lighter vein and serve ..D&te ..... ~.•... IIio •••••••••• -. as oases. as it were. in the dry desert of verbal duels. None of these exchanges are pre-rehearsed or pre-meditated and that is precisely why they are so good. They are the products of lively and vivacious minds reacting instantly to a particular situation; words often uttered by persons who could normally claim no particular ability to be witty. Cutting across the party lines or political differences these crisp observations often serve the purpose of lightening the published by atmosphere in the House which otherwise could be serious and tension-ridden. Without Secretary General, Rajya Sabha these. the debate and proceedings of the House would be sterile indeed.

A few such instances of witty, awky ane. drolly statements have been culled out rror,i the proceedings of. the Rajya Sabha and included in this booklet. I hope members t> , '1

would find them interesting. Members are Advantages Of Not Having A Son Or A Daughter also requested that in case they are in possession of any interesting instances of humour or wit in the Rajya Sabha, or if they While speaking on the Appropriation have any suggestion for improvement they Bill, Shri Bhupesh Gupta made the following may kindly be passed on to Shri MoC. observation: - Banerjee. Deputy Director. Rajya Sabha Secretariat so that the same could be "Corruption is rampant. I would just incorporated in the next issue of this give you one instance. I feel very hurt publication which is proposed to be brought when I have to speak against my

out at periodic intervals 0 colleagues in Parliament, whether. they are Ministers or their family members. But public duty is public duty. Since I have no son or a daughter or a son-in-law or daughter-in-law, perhaps I should speak a little like that and I SUDARSHAJ.\IAGARWAL, hope my friends will not misunderstand Secretary -General, me, even Mr. Morarji should not misunderstand me... II NEW ; The -"lst July, 1985 Vice-Chairman. Shri Lakshmanan, who was in the ChB:ir agreed with him:-

"Dada, in that you are in an advantageous position. Since you ~o not have a son or a daughter. you are in an advantageous position. II 00

Air Accident Vs. Railway Accident In question hour when Shri Mohd. Shafi Qureshi. the Deputy Minister in the Ministry of Railway was answering a Question on the Railway accident, Shri J,P. Mathur made the following remark:-

"S0 far in our ,country death in Air accident is to be more profitable than 2 3

"Railway accident. Those who die in concerned, there cannot be anything plane crash get one lakh rupees." except ashes. *" 00 00

All Fools Day Attracting Attention In The House And Outside

Shri Chand Ram, Minister of State in During supplementaries to Starred charge of the Ministry of Shipping and Question on the activities of Rashtriya Transport was answering a question on the Swayamsewak Sangh, Shri Piloo Mody plying of mini-buses in Delhi. addressing the Home Minister said as follows:- SHRI KHURSHID ALAM KHAN: Congratulate the Minister because he had decided to make "Do not look towards the Prime all these changes from the 1st April, which Minister. She may be more attractive. was supposed to be the fools day. Look towards me."

Prof. observed: Prime Minister, Smt. Indira intervened that Shri Mody had no difficulty "That is keeping you in view." in attracting attention here or anywhere 00 else. 00

Ashes From Soda-Ash

In the course of supplementaries to a question about distribution of Soda-Ash Shri Kalyan Roy interjected and satirically remarked:

"A lot of ashes will come out of the Soda-Ash."

The Minister Shri paid back the member in the same coin: *The reference to the member had probably been made as he was a very prominent leader "So far as Mr. . Kalyan Roy is of Coal Miners. 4 5

Bachelor Father Shri Naval Kishore said that he stood with a heavy heart to support the measure in the SHRI BHUPESHGUPTA: The Hon'ble Minister interest of the country. Thereupon Shrl should know the family planning thing a Bhupesh Gupta jocularly remarked that he little better. Simply because a person is controverted the member's assertion that he bachelor it does not mean that he is not was standing with a heavy heart. He responsible for babies being produced. proposed that Shri Naval Kishore may be put to medical examination before he was allowed SHRI : Sir, I never knew to continue further. Shri Naval Kishore this, we will use this contention against him immediately replied as follows;- (Shri Gupta) * in the election campaign. 00 "Mr. Bhupesh Gupta knows nothing about heart. He is a barren bachelor. II Bachelor's Companion 00 In a debate on Salary, Allowances and Beautiful -Ladles In Control Of the House Pension of Members of Parliament Bill, 1980 Kumari Saroj Khaparde demanded issue of Shri Arona Aladi alias V. Arunachalam 'Companion' passes for rail travel to bachelor while felicitating Dr. (Smt.) Najma Heptul1a members like Shri Bhupesh Gupta and on her. election as Deputy Chairman. herself. Thereupon Shri Gupta reacted in his observed as follows;- inimitable style and commented as under:- "To control the House successfully and III am almost inclined to sympathise with cOndLlCtthe proceedings comfortably, as you, but I have no companion,II far.as1Jlen are concerned. it is difficult bu{"so 'far as ladies are concerned, if It was left to Dr. Bhai Mahavir to have they are old, it is quite natural that the last word:- the House will be sympathetic. If they IIBoth the Hon'ble Members can solve are beautif~. ',and young. their radiance each other's problems. II will satisfy the House.II 00 00 Bachelor's Knowledge About Heart Bold Burglar The House was discussing the A calling attention relating to the Maintenance of Internal Security Bill, 1971. deteriorating law and order situation in Delhi was under discussion in the House. An *Shri Bhupesh Gupta was a life-long bachelor. Hon'ble Member, Shri K.P. Subramaniam . . . . .' referred to an attempted burglary in the House of Shri A.K. Gopalan CPlv1leader and I> , '

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Ii Member of ParUainent0 Shrl K 0 Co Pant. the SHRI MoS. GURUPADASWAMY:Beautyshould M1n.ister of State for Home observed as also be taxed. follows~ SHRI VISHWANATHPRATAP SINGH: Who liMy Honible friend referred to some would be the assessor? attempt at Sbrl Gopalanis house. I must say, it must be very bold burglar. who SHRI M.So GURUPADASWAMY:Iwill be the

0 attempted this n assessor 0 Shrl Bhupesh Gupta immediately reacted SHRI R. RAMAKRISHNAN~I am happy that as follows~- the budget has evoked such a hearty response. nMust be people belonging to your 00

department 0 II

00 Bulk Of The Volume Budget Response A copy of the summary of conclusions and recommendations as contamed in the SHRI R 0 RAMAKRISHNAN~There will still be report of Shri Justice e.A. Vaidialingam was a few people who will even criticise beautiful being laid on the Table of the House. ladies 0 They will always say that her ear is Referring to the demand of Shri Plloo Mody a little loppy or u her nose had been a little to haVE!the entire report laid on the Table. longer, it would have been better or that if Mr. Chairman said: her complexion had been a little more fair. it would have been better. Similarly. there are "Mr. Mody, the bulk of that report is various comments on the budget saying that very frightening; it would not be the income-tax exemption limit should have POSSI"ble •.• II been raised to 25.0001- rupees. I think it is like saying that a lady is beautiful and fair SHRI PILOO MODY: You know, I have never and if she had been fairer. it would have been frightened by the bulk. Sir. been better. . MR. CHAIRMAN:I refer to. the bulk of the SHRI V. GOPALSAMY:Tastes dUfer from volume.* individual to individual. 00 '-.~ DBP(,J,TYCHAIRMAN: I thought you were r;1isc~ssingthe budget. sHtn PARVATHANENI UPENDRA: He is "'Shri. Ptloo Mody was a fat and bulky member dt8~ssing beautiful ladies and not budget. of the House. "',~~~'L 8 9 Chair Cannot Be Chivalrous This led to the following interesting The Deputy. Chairman asked Smto exchange:- Sumitra Kulkarni, who was speaking on the SHRI D.P. PHAR: A good deal of honesty general discussion on the budget to conclude not a little honesty. I would not accept and without giving any further time to her, Bhupesh Babuls suggestion that we should he called upon the next Speaker Shrl DoL0 be content with a little honesty. We should Sen Gupta to speak 0 Feeling a little emb;urassed, 8hrl Sen Gupta said:- be more honesto •. SHRI BHUPESH GUPTA: Bhupesh Babu is ill have to disturb a lady speaker , who now a very mature man, Mr. Dhar. Sir. I do was speaking really nicely a n share his sentiments. But corruption is so Mr. Deputy Chairman thereupon reacted much, so monumental and great, that a little as follows~- honesty will be great blessing.

DI have to regulate the time, I cannot SHRI D.P. DHAR: I must say that if a be as chivalrous as the other people crusader like Bhupesh Da yields to despair are. II and is prepared to condone dishonesty. then 00 I think the future of this country is really bleak. We have got to condemn dishonesty Charity Begins At Every Home wherever it is and we shall not be satisfied The House was considering a motion with a little honesty ... regarding approach to the 5th Five Year Plan,. 1974-79. While making his speech, the SHRI BHUPESH GUPTA: Then, let charity Plannmg Minister, 8hri D.P. Dhar observed begin at home. as follows:- SHRI D.P. DHAR: It has to begin at every IlWe also have to ensure greater home... ?fficiency in the formulation of projects, SHRI BHUPE8H GUPTA: Do not change the In the implementation of projects and old English idiom: Charity begins at home. not only that, not only efficiency, but not at levery' home. :uso a greater degree of economy and, if I may say so, parsimony 0 SHRI D.P. DHAR: Wherever an English idiom has to be made properly applicable to a set Shri Bhupesh Gupta added:- of circumstances. . it should be changed. That's why X said not only home but levery IlAnd a little honesty too. II home'. 00

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Coca Cola And Parle Concern For Property

SHRI J.K. JAIN: Sir, there is an During the discussion over a calling important announcement. Mr. Piloo Mody has attention relating to deteriorating law and joined our party and he is sitting in the order situation in Delhi, when Shri K. C . .I treasury benches. It is an important Pant made some remarks in lighter vein to announcement. He has joined our party. which Shri Bhupesh Gupta said that he I appreciated jokes but: SHRI NAGESHWAR PRASAD SHAH!: Mr. Chairman, how can Coca Cola and Parle go "Not at the cost of my throat; not at together? Both cannot go together. the cost of little property that I have, I like humour but not humour at the MR. CHAIRMAN: You can have them one mercy of burglars. " after the other, 00 MR. DEPUTY CHAIRMAN: You do not havE" any property. Companions For Bachelors SHRI K. C. PANT: I am very glad that he During a debate on the Railway Budget, has concern for property. Shri P. C . Sethi the Minister of Railways informed the House that there had. been SHRI BHUPESH GUPTA: Yes, of coarse, I representations to the Department of have. I have a typewriter - the highest Parliamentary Affairs, the Ministry of property that I have. Railways and the Prime Minister with regard 00 to free railway passes for the spouses of Bon 'ble Members of Parliament.

SI-iRI J.P. MATHUR: What about those who have no spouse?

MR. DEPUTY CHAIRMAN: You can have it.

SHRI J. P. lilA THUR: That means anyone will he able to travel free with members like me. • am a bachelor. I can take anybody. 00'

" 12 13 Daughter-in-law Vs. Mother-in-law . Shri Kulkarni wanted to speak b t Mr Chairman had his own problem. He SHRI SHANTI G. PATEL: [Speaking on w~s finding it difficult to control the Hon'ble Payment of Bonus (Amendment) Bill] I know, lady members, the present Labour Minister may be MR CHAIRMAN: Mr. Kulkarni, will yO? .giulve sympathetic with us. He would like to plead . 'nute I find it even more difflC t that his Ministry has been doing it all along. me one ml . But his position is just like a to control the Hon'ble lady members. daughter-in-law in the House. The real SHRI PILOO MODY: That is the dif~iculty mother-in-law' is the Finance Ministry. And with all of us. All of us have expenenced mother-in-law rules the house, not the that difficulty. 00 Labour Minister, So the poor fellow cannot do anything, 00 Discounting Has Started Dead Chair The House was discussing a dem~nd for . on the two ordinances a diScusslOn t f that When the House was going through the ':;'.omulgated before the commencemen 0 . supplementaries to a question regarding S~ssion. While speaking on the same, Shn P, black marketing and hoarding of essential Ramamurti said as follows:- commodities, Shri A. G. Kulkarni insisted on showing a paper to the Chair whereupon the -"Unfortunately Sir, on such an latter advised that it should be shown to the important question, people who count, II Minister because it is the Minister who had have run away. to reply. Shri Piloo Mody submitted that This led to the following cross ~~~ questions to Minister could be put only between Shri Bhupesh Gupta and through the Chair. Rarnamurti: MR. CHAIRMAN: That is just because it is a SHRI BHUPESH GUPTA: Mr. Dharia counts. dead chair. StiRI RAMAMURTI: He counts. SHRI PILOD MODY: The Chair is dead or alive depending upon the occupant. SHRI BHUPESH GUPTA: I do .not kn~lWwhen h ill be discounted. Dlscountmg has 00 ..e w started. * 00 Diffkult To Control Lady Members ------:-:-'.-_ •.. ----- h running the The nouse was discussing a special *.Tanata Party whic L was mention on the reported move by the ruling alreud'" •Goverilment at the ven'" tre ",'.ad .T party to encourage defections of l"LAs in started falling apart. 14 15 fJt>mestic Bliss Elevation To The Cabinet SHRI MADHAVRAO (THE MINISTER OF STATE IN THE MINISTRY OF Shri Bhupesh Gupta was r.eferring. to RAILWAYS): Sir, a number of Hon'ble the need for setting up enqUlry agaInst Members were very much exercised about the persons in high authority against wh0II! th~:e fact that they were unable to be accompanied have been allegations. While Shn BIJU by their spouses, The Railway Minister, Mr, Patnaik interrupted him, Shri Bhupesh Gupta , has taken into consideration the reacted as follows: views of the Members of 'Parliament. In consultation with the Ministry of "Mr, is a pastmaster. He P~rliamentary Affairs and the Ministry of himself has been subject of so many FInance, he has issued orders today commissions of' inquiry, He should not restoring this facility. I hope this will dispel be afraid of it. He is the man who has fears in the minds of members about their faced commissions of inquiry like a future domestic bliss. soldier in the Second . For 00 him a commission of inquiry means elevation to the Uni n Cabinet. II 00 ry Bath Essential Commodity The House was discussing the stoppage During a Calling Attention discussi?n of water supply in M.Ps' flats in South regarding non-availability of essentIal Avenue. Shri A,G. Kulkarni made a commodities some members wanted that the reference to this matter in the House and Minister ought to have been able to give related his conversation with the Works q information about some specific essential Housing Minister who, he agitatedly told commodities. Thereupon Shri Bhupesh Gupta had advised him to take a dry bath. Shrf quipped: , Piloo Mody interrupted to say that if a . . ii person wanted to have a dry bath, he need "It seems, according to the Minister the '. not go to the bathroom. To this . Shri only essential Gommodity is the Minister Kulkarni quipped as follows: _ ' and that is in abundant supply." 00 "Mr. Modyrs American system of dry E:{change Of Compliments bat~ must be in bed; We people are Indians. Our bath is in the bathrooms. II SHRI M.S. RAMACHANDRAN: Mr. Chairman, .'i. ' I I:I . 00 Sir, I am afraid, the Hon'ble Minister is n:;: I I I" I' , It' 1,- . u:., '-nmr- ~I 16 17

properly briefed. I am sorry to say that. support to the Finance Minister, another Member, Shri Bhupesh Gupta said:- SHRI JANARDHAN POOJARI (MINISTER OF, STATE FOR FINANCE): Sir, I think the "Sir, in the film world we have got non 'ble Member could not understand my extras. I beg to know whether in the answer. Cabinet also we have introduced that MR. CHAIRMAN: Don't exchange compliments. system. I would like to know the Please answer the question. answer. Because we have got Cabinet 00 Minister, Ministers of State and Deputy Ministers. Now, I want to know whether Exporting Agent you have developed the system of During the supplementaries to a extras as we have known in the film question on the provision for replacing of world." tracks and purchase of Railway wagons in the Sixth Five Year Plan, Shri Indradeep Shri Sinha while expressing his Sinha criticised the Government's policy of ignorance of what Shri Gupta was aiming at importing metre gauge rails instead of observed that in the film industry there are manufacturing them, because it caused also jokers. delay. Shri Piloa Mody interrupted to say that the delay was caused not by importing Thereupon, Shri Bhupesh Gupta it but by manufacturing it. Shri Sinha retorted thus:- retorted as follows:- "That is also the role of the extras. No "You are not the sole importing agent. filmstar gets money by becoming a There are so many others." joker. Therefore, that is a job for the MR. CHAIRMAN: No, no, he is not an extras." importing agent. He is an exporting agent. 00 S~~Ri PILOO MODY: I export ideas on a barren market. 00 ::xtras In The Cabinet

During a general discussion on Budget :.S71-72 , after Shri H.? Sinha had finished ~:5.8 speech by wcic~1 :103 gave an ali-out 18 19

Fat Persons Have Enough Patience quotation of a poet which says:

SHRI P. SHIV SHANKAR: If my Hon'ble "Ill fares the land, to hastening ills a friend does not have the patience to listen to prey. me, I am very sorry. I cannot help it. Where wealth accumulates and men decay;" SHRI PILOO MODY: I am supplying you the patience. I will only make a small change in this famous quotation and say: SHRI P. SHIV SHANKAR: You need not supply. You are patient enough. That is "Ill fares the land. to hastening ills a why you are so fat. prey, 00 Where files accumulate and men delay; ." , 00

Fifteen Thousand Tonnes and Piloo Mody Final And Semi-Final . The Minister for , Rao Birendra Singh was answering Shri Piloo PROF: C. LAKSHMANNA: Finally -. this is Mody who expressed dissatisfaction over the final - I have a word about the junior reported export of 15000 tonnes of Sugar. artistes, otherwise known as "extras".

RAO BIRENDRA SINGH: The quantity of SHRI N.K.P. SALVE: His every "Final" is 15000 tonnes, Mr. Mody, compared to your "Semi-final" • size is very small. ' VICE-CHAIRMAN: Quarter-final. SHRI PILOO MODY: Several things compared to my size are very small, including you. SliRI V. GOPALSAMY: It is "League 00 system." Files Accumulate And Men Delay PROF. C. LAKSHMANNA: We will go to the While speaking on the Administrative final and win the trophy 'fribunals Bill, 1985, Shri R. Ramakrishnan 00 observed as follows:- Fit For Dancing Institution "Madam, in this connection, I would like . . '~'he House was' discussing the. matter you to be reminded of a famous regarding the allegations made against' Shr~ 20 21

Kanti Bh~ Des~,. son of ShIi , Going To The Orbit former PrUDe MInIster. 8hIi Manubhai Patel who. rais~d a point of order spoke very During supplementaries to Starred feelingly In favour of Shri Desai with a lot Question regarding congestion in the of movement of his limbs. Shri Bhupesh Geostationary Orbit in space Dr. (Smt.) Gupta who was watching him closely Najma Heptulla wanted to know from the observed:- Minister what the Government of was doing to prevent foreign probing satellites "Sir, I have listened to his point of which were being put in the Geostationary order. If the movement of his hands if Orbit. Shri Piloo Mody said that they were the movement of his fingers is releva~t, going to put Usha* into Orbit. . he should be sent to some dancing institution. " Smt. Usha Malhotra immediately reacted 00 as follows:- Fitting Compliments To Minister "I do not mind going provided you come along so that I could leave you there S~RI PARVATHANENI UPENDRA: I am not and come back myself." gomg ~o ask any questions. But I would 00 only like to compliment him* for "'he ~normou~ pains he has taken-pains not O;ly In knowmg but also understanding at least half the -queries we raised. The other half he. could get away with, with his charming smile.

00

*Shri Minister of State in *Smt. Usha Malhotra, a Lady Member of the the Ministry of Railways'. Rajya Sabha. / 22 23 He Does Not Jump But Schouts Ignorance Of The Subject

The House was .considering the Stamp SHRI RAJ BAHADUR: I do not think that and ~xcise Duties Bill, 1971. In the course anybody else can produce anybody else's of hIS speech, Shri S•S• Sanyal said as children. follows :- SHRI BHUPESH GUPTA: You have shown your ignorance of the subject. IIln this connection, Sir, may I have a 00 very unfavourable matter raised here? I hop~ my Hon'ble friend Mr. Yajee will Information, Not Protection not Jump up. II Dissatisfied with the reply given by the Shri A.Do Mani thereupon replied :- Minister of , Dr, P. C. Chunder during supplementaries to a question on the IIHe does not jump up. He only shouts 0 II number of scheduled castes and scheduled 00 tribes students in University, Shri addressing Holding The Baby the Chairman said that he needed his protection. Shri Piloo Mody thereupon Duri~~ the question hour, Shri Om quipped: Mehta, MInIster of State in the Ministry of ~~rks and .H.o~sing was answering a question "You do not need protection. You need vill the facilitIes for drinking water in the information. "

ages 0 When the Minister informed the ~ouse that the Accelerated Rural Water Interested in Chicken upply P~ogr~mme was in the State sector SHRI V. GOPALSAMY: Sir. I am very sorry ~he follow~ng mteresting exchange took plac~ to say because of the callous attitude of etween him and Shri A. G. Kulkarni. India, because of the indifferent attitude of India. because of the low- key approach, because of the chicken-hearted approach of theSHRI baby. A. G. KULKARNI: You are only holding the Indian Government to the Sri Lankan problem ... SHRI OM MEHTA' That' . MR. CHAIRMAN: People will be interested in has to hold th b b'd IS nght, somebody e a y. chicken. SHRI KHURSHID ALAM KHAN: Sir, I really SHRIa t A. G~ KULKARNI'. Why doyou . accept -' do not know whether the Hon'ble Member is .P ren age when you cannot take care of it? -." a vegetarian or a non-vegetarian. •. •.•..• . 00 00 _. 24 25 Last But' Not The Least Leave Us In Peace

SHRI M.S. GURUPADASWAMY:Madam Deputy . . the question Chairman, having called me the last Speaker, The House was discussmg f the b the Government 0 . you have given me an opportunity to say the of abuse y. owers of the Presld~nt last word on behalf of the Opposition on this Ordinance makmg p f the Constitution. subject. under Article ~23 aRamamurti. who was Interrupting Shn POt for issuing a large DEPUTY CHAIRMAN: You may not be the criticising Governmen during the recess of least! number of Ordinanc~~ Zakaria asked Shri 00 Parliamen~. Dr: dR~;tqhow many Ordinanc~s Ramamurtl to fm the Government. m last Call-girl had been issued by. t' West and the Governm~n P ~ rule. Shri DUring the diSCUssion on a Call which were under the acivi~eci Dr 0 Zakaria Attention regarding the startling disclosure Piloo Mody stood up an d made by Mr. Daniel Patrick Moynihan, a as follows:- former U. S. Ambassador to India regarding uest Mr. Zakaria to payment of U. S. money for election purposes "Sir. I would req f the in India, there were frequent interruptions become a MemAber~lies simultaneously from various sections of the House; d Kerala ssem " particularly Shri Jagjit Singh Anand and :~d leave us in peace over here. 00 Shri Piloo Mody were having an altercation Shri Mody at one stage doubted the knowledge of English of Shri Anand and looking More Into Faces Than Things asked a third Member, Shri Bhupesh Gupta, . The trouble with to read out the disputed portion in Mr. SHRI BHUPESH GUPTA' looking into so Moynihan's' "A Dangerous Place." Shri are Bhupesh Gupta said:- you. S~ ' is th~~ x~tknow how long I. will many thmgs. I things looked mto. have to live to have my (Interrup tion) HIt is written here: 'My last call in India was Pileo Mady.' Thank God, Mr. CFAIRMAN: But I can .tell you. I am Piloe Marly was not a woman. Otherwise, ~~king into more faces than thmgs. . 1::.ewould have written 'My last call-girl 00 was PileD Mody. '"

00 26 27

Marriage: Fusion Not Confusion SHRI KALYAN ROY: Let him be exported.

. .The House was discussing MR.. CHAIRMAN: There are many unessential Marnage (Amendment) Bill moved by Shri S.S. Chaurasia. commodities, some superfluous also. 00

SHRI K.K. MADHAVAN: Sir, I think the Minister Is Always Right mover of the Bill himself has been confused It is a product of confusion of confused thinking. ' The House was disucssing a question on the constitution of an International Naval Force Armada for patrolling the Gulf Area. SHRI YOGENDRA SHARMA: Marriage is also a product of confusion. Commenting on the answer given by the Minister in the reply to a supplementary. Shri Piloo Mody said:- SHRI K.K. MADHAVAN: Fusion not confusion. There is a lot of difference between fusion and confusion. "On this occasion. the Minister is right. Most surprisingly, the Minister. is 00 right. " Minister: An Unessential Commodity Shri P. V. Narasimha Rao. Minister of Shri Jagannath Pahadia, Minister of External Affairs told Shri Mody that .he State .for Finan.ce was replying a question would surprise him more and more by bemg r~gar~n.g the mdustrial units. Apparently always right. Shri Piloo Mody thereupon dissatIsfIed with his performance Shri replied as follows:- Kalyan Roy observed as follows: _ ' "You are becoming like your boss. "Sir. we should also take note of the (reference to Prime Minister, Smt. performance of the Ministers. Mr. ). She says she is always Venkataraman * has disappeared." right. Sometimes to make some mistake is human." This led to the following exchange: 00 SERI PILOO MODY: Minister is Minister's Faces On The T •V • unessential commodity. an SHRI N.K.P. SALVE: 1 do not for a moment agree that there is any pOli!ic.al ~ter!erence '~R.efers to the Minister of Finance. whatsoever . I have workea ill It. ~xcept, when Mrs. Gandhi told me once "Please do not t> 28 29 show the Ministers too often. II She said IIIf you want to show some programmes in which some anxious moments. what has the Ministers are there, kindly give happened to you. II importance to programmes and do not show 00 the faces of the Ministers too often. II Moolchand Or MalColm SHRI : Ministerial faces are quite entertaining. Do not deprive us. Do While participating in a debate Shri not deny us. Pattabhi Rao. Minister of State in the Ministry of Finance. referred to Dr, Malcolm SHRI S. W.DHABE: We are not averse to it. S. Adiseshiah, a member of the House, as Dr, Moolchand* S, Adiseshiah. The Minister SHRI N.K.P. SALVE: Mr. Jaswant Singh and was immediately corrected by some other Mr. Dhabe consider that they have been member saying that he was not Moolchand very generous to the Ministers. I put it to but Malcolm Adiseshiah, Mr. Gadgil that if you want a bigger entertainment, people like Mr. Jaswant Singh On this Dr, Bhai Mahavir quipped:- and Mr. Dhabe should be shown. 00 1'1 think . the Minister cannot do Missing Minister anything without referring to . the notes. II The House re-assembled after lunch at 8 minutes passed of 2' a Clock. 'Some of the Members were agitated because the' concerned Minister was not present, At this stage, the Home Minister, Shri H. M. Patel was seen entering the House hurriedly. Seeing him , Shri Bhupesh Gupta Said:-

IISir , we spent two minutes very anxiously because the Minister was not coming. I was thinking of making an a.nnouncement over the All India Radio that the Minister is missing and sending a message to the Police Commissioner. Good heavens he has come. We passed *Shri Moolchand Daga is a member of . 30 31

Mothers Of ConfUl;.ion Kerala. He does not want to say where the danger is coming from. While participating in a debate, a member used a certain expression which was SHRI B. SATYANARAYAN REDDY:? If that ordered to be expunged. Reacting to this lady has no son. how will she address. Shri Piloo Mody said that in the English language it is a perfectly acceptable SHRI N. E . BALARAM: I do not know that. parliamentary expression to say that Ask the Minister. something is a mother of something else, and 00 the remark was not meant literally in the sense in which some members had interpreted it. He was therefore, the. last person to accept expunction of an innocent remark like that from the proceedings of the House.

MR. CHAIRMAN: I have already ruled on the subject. • . Mr. Piloo Mody, I find many mothers of confusion in this House . • 11 SHRI PILOO MODY: Now I think they will not ask for expunction of your remarks. You have insulted them much more than anybody here could have.

00 My Son's Father

SHRI N.E. BALARAM: In Kerala, suppose you ask a Namboodri lady, I mean a Brahmin lady, what her husband's name is. She \\Jill never say that. She will only reply. "The name of my husband is my son Is father. " SUppose she is asked to recite the Mantram of .I!arayanaya Namaha an9- suppose her husband's name is r.larayana, she ",ill say i ll.>iy son Is father Namaha." Like that, the I Fcreign ~;inister is like that Brahmin lady in f 32 33

No Question When Ladies An~Quarrelling Obsolete Landing Instrurr.ents In question hour an altercation took It was during the question hour that place between Shrimati Usha Malhotra and some members were asking supplementaries Shr~ati Margaret Alva. At this stage the on the question on insufficient landing Charrman called upon Shri Bhandare to put instruments at airports, when the Minister. his question, Shri A,P, Sharma, informed the House that the landing instruments were not outdated. SHRI BHANDARE; Sir, I cannot put my But his statement was contested by Shri question when two ladies are quarrelling 0 ,

MR, CHAIRMAN: Naturally. nobody can, SHRI PILOO MODY: How old are they? As 00 old as Mrs. Usha Malhotra, for instance? Not Creditable Not To Have A Son SHRI A, G. KULKARNI: Sir. you as a Judge decide whether two decades old technology is Shri Bhupesh Gupta was speaking in obsolete or not. ' favour of the demand that the correspondence between the Prime Minister MR. CHAIRMAN: I do not know. Mr. S~~ Morarji ;Desai and the Union Hom~ Kulkarni. how old are they. Mmlst~r, Shn regarding SHRI A. G. KULKARNI: I say they are two alle!5atlOns and counter - allegations made decades old. agaInst each other's family members should be laid. on the Table of the House. In this MR. CHAIRMAN: They say, they are connection, he talked as follows:- up-to-date. SHRI A.G. KULKARNI: I am not mentioning "Why can't you lay it on the Table of anybody1s age here as Mr. Piloo Mody the. House? What is the difficulty in it? does .•• !t IS because Prime Minister's son is mvolved? I do not have a son' Mr MR. CHAIRMAN: Mr. Pileo Mody needs a Piloo Mody, have you got a son?' Well' special instrument. 00 even being married you do not have ~ son? It is not a credit on your part." One Baig As Good As Another Shri Piloo Mody thereupon quipped:- MR. CHAIRMAN: Mr. Aiyubbaig. He is interested in the . ilIt is one of my greatest SHRI IRSHADBAIG AIYUBBAIG MIRZA: I am qualifications. Ii Irshadbaig . 00 •

34 35

MR. CHAIRMAN: It does not matter. One Baig Pass Fer ~pouse, I ot For Spice is as good as another Baig. 00 SHHI MADHAVRAO SCn.mIA: Just one clarification I want to have. Is he talking One Who Is Present Cannot L1epresent about the companion or his wife/spouse?

SHRI PILOO MODY: Sir, what about Question VICE-CHAIRMAN: (SHRI R. RAMAKRISHNAN): No. 303? He is talking about both.

MR. CHAIRMAN: The Member is absent. SHRI RAMCHANDRA BHARADWAJ: There are bachelors also. , SHRI PILOO MODY: Sir. I am present. SHRI R. MOHANARANGAM: Spouse or MR. CHAIRMAN: You are present. but you companion. Let it be both. cannot represent. 00 SHRIMATI KANAK MUKHERJEE: I have paid Rs. 320 today.

SHRI R. MOHANARANGAM: Spouse and companion will not travel simultaneously. It is better to have one.

SHRI MADHAVRAO SCINDIA: I am reminded of what Mr. said when he was the Railway Minister. He was asked whether this pass would be restricted only for the wife or also for the companion. Mr. Jagjivan Ram answered: "The pass is for the spouse. not for the spice."

SHRIMATI KANAK MUKHERJ-EE: Vlhat is this? There is a difference between the two. We have to pay extra.

VICE-CHAIRMAN: That is what the Banlble Member is making a request. t> ':">.l 37 36 "t, ., attention on the non-availability of SHRI R .. MOHANARANGAL: "Spices" are not foodgr8.ins in varlous\"parts 'of'.ihe 'country. expected to pay. Referring ,to the situation. in West Beng~. 00 'Shri Lokanath Mi.sra expressed hIS Preventing Heart Attack dissati~faction and stated'" '.t~at~ '.. some supporters of either the Congress' Party or Shri . Leader the C.P.1. who own fair price shops do not of the House. while felicitating Dr. (Smt. ) allow food grains to percolate down to the Najma Heptulla on her unanimous election as consumers.~ ' • .1 '. • the Deputy Chairman observed as follows:-

IISir. this House. as you know. does not Shri Bhupesh Gupta added that)t was always deliberate; it also fulminates and reported in some papers, that two .verr close Sir. you have seen one instance of it. associates of Mr. Kashl Kant MOltra, have On such occasions I am sure. her been arrested in a prostitute'shouse. Dr. presence will be a soothing balm for her K. Mathew Kurian thereupon observed:- research for Ph.D degree has been a "They should have been procuring research on the anatomy of the heart wheat and rice. They were procuring and I am sure she will not allow us. more soft stuff. II sitting either on this side or on the 00 other side. to give each other a heart attack. II ProteCting The' Counfry , . .' 00 When Shri Yogendra Makwana. the Private Fight Minister of State in the Ministry of. Horne Affairs was replying to a question on the DR. RAFIQ ZAKARIA: Sir. this kind of deportation of foreign national~ from Assan: running commentary by Mr. Mody should the Chairman intervened. Shu N. P . Shahl stop. 'got an impression that the Chairman was siding with the Government and told him not MR. CHAIRMAN: You can have your private to do so but protect the interest of the fight outside. Members. To this the Chairman :replied that he was not protecting the Government; S"~RI PILOO MODY: Sir. he is afraid of :rather he was protecting the country. ITiseting me outside. 00 *Food and Civil Supplies 1Ai~ister in the West F'rccurement Of Soft 5t'-"ff . Bengal Government. :"he House was discussing a calling 38 39

Shri Piloo Mody thereupon remarked: Rabies And The Elections The House was discussing a starred l'If you want to protect the country. we question on detection of Rabies Disease in will send you to the borders, Sir. Delhi; Shri Purabi Mukhopadhyay asked the Right now, you protect our interests. Mini.ster when you catch stray dogs, what do 00 you do with them?

Purchase By Minsiter's Wife MR. CHAIRMAN: I thought, Mr. Piloo Mody, will have much to say about rabies ... The Minister of Commerce, Civil Supplies and Steel Ii Mines (Shri Pranab SHRI PILOO MODY: I have already said that Mukherjee) was replying to supplementaries since the last election * the danger has gone to a starred question on the price of edible up in Delhi. oils. Apparently dissatisfied with the 00 answer, Shrimati Purobi Mukhopadhayay said Relativity In Time as follows :- DEPUTY CHAIRMAN: We now take up "Sir, the house-wives like to know General Budget discussion. Shri Nirmal whether the Civil Supplies Minister or Chatterjee. May I tell you, Mr. Chatterjee. anybody in the Council of Ministers has your party has got 43 minutes. and I expect visited a market to purchase oil?" you to finish in 40 minutes.

The Commerce Minister quickly replied:- SHRI NIRMAL CHATTERJEE: We have to remind Dr. Heptulla, the Scientist, that time "So far as this question is concerned. I is a very very relative concept as has been am glad to answer that at least my wife established in the earlier century. visits market and she purchase for herself. " DEPUTY CHAIRMAN: Not since I have taken the Chair. Before passing on to the next question 00 the Chairman had the last say: Reversed Roles Shri Piloo Mody want~d to make some HI hope after this assurance that the submissions when the Minister was answering wife of the Honlble Minister goes to t> purchase oil, everytlling is brought. to ".1 his notice. Ii *The General Elections took place in co Janum-oy. 1980 which returned Congress ( ) to power. 40 41

a. question. The, Chairman did not allow Shri Searching The Bathrooms iltlOdy to speak and told him that nothin would. be recorded while he' (Chairman) wa~ VICE-CHAIRMAN (SHRI BANKA BEHARY standing. . DAS): Mala Sinha *, not Mala Singh •••

SHRI PILOO MODY: I am sitting." SHRI BHUPESH GUPTA: I do not go to films. Therefore, I stand corrected. MR. CH:AIRM~N: I am standing. VICE-CHAIRMAN (SHRI BANKA BEHARY SHRI ~ILOO MODY: Unfortunately; the roles DAS): So you should not talk about it. are ~el?g r:eversed. The person who should be. sItting IS standing and the person who SHRI BHUPESH GUPTA: We saw that in her should be standing has to sit. bathroom Rs. 20 lakhs were found. Well, I do not know how many bathrooms are to be 00 searched. Now this is happening. Therefore, you should go after them but not in the bad sense of the ,term. I do not ask Mr. Shukla to go after them in the wrong way. I ask him as a tax collector to go after them and collect the money from them. 00

Sense Of Timing

SHRI : Here, the question is, five instalments of DA have oecome due. What we have said in the statement is that, we have not yet taken a decision on making the actual payment. It would not be possible for. me to indicate when exactly or at what point of time it would be possible for us to make the payment.

SHRI SURESH KALMADI: Just before the elections. I can tell you the timing. co

*She is a famous film star.

",

!; t'

I, I 42 43

Signs Of Backwardness discrimination on ground of sex alone as on ground of religion. Therefore, you While speaking on the Report of the will excuse me Sir... Madam. due to Commission for Linguistic Minorities. Shri habit we address you as Sir. But the T .N • Singh. a Member made the following General Clauses Act says 'a male speech in his effort to prove how much includes a female'. Eve was born out of anglicizing was going on in our national life: the very flesh of Adam. that is what the Old Testament teaches us." "In my own life in the last 50 years I 00 have seen the Western or anglicized way of life becoming more popular in this Sleeping Not Sitting beloved country of ours than it was 50 years ago. We want to flaunt that we During the oral answer to a question on are modern by indentifying ourselves the number of members of the Christian with the Western way of living, There community in Kashmir, Shri Bhupesh Gupta are people who in their own home call dissatisfied with the reply given by the their father"daddy". their mother Home Minister angrily demanded: "mummy" and the child "baby". And if I were to call my wife "Shrimatiji". I "Here is the Prime Minister sitting. Why will be thought backward." is he not answering the questions?" 00 Shri Piloo Mody quietly stood up and Sir Versus Madam jocularly remarked:-

The Minister of Law and Justice, Shri "He is not sitting; he is sleeping." Asoke Sen, during his reply to the 00 Constitution (Fifty-Second Amendment) Bill, 1985. while explaining his repeated slips in Soft And Hard Drinks addressing the Deputy Chairman, Dr.(SmL) Najma Heptulla as 'Sir', said as follows:- While replying to a supplementary during question time Agriculture Minister "Now, Sir. .• Madam, when a Madam Rao Birendra Singh inter alia said that he adorns the Chair, we forget 'our pledge did not know much about soft drinks because to God to thank him for making us man he did not use them. This evoked following becc.~se we forget that this country is mir'thful exchanges: ' basen on equality between. the sexes and the Constitution forbids MR. CHAIRMAN: I warn the Minister that on l> ~:" 44 45 this statement of his a supplementary might be asked. without the subject and one could ramble on everything. I think, you are, perhaps, a SHRI A. G. KULKARNI: You go in for hard champion in that. drinks. SHRI N.K.P. SALVE: He means soft drinks SHRI BHUPESH GUPTA: I am very glad I am also. reminded of your college days. One thing you have not said. How many times you have RAO BIRENDRA SINGH: In soft drinks I am passed and how many times you have failed. only fond of lassi and milk. SHRI KHURSHID ALAM KHAN: Even at this VICE-CHAIRMAN (SHRI A.G. KULKARNI): age. For your information, I am a graduate in 00 . Sound And fury SHRI BHUPESH GUPTA: I am glad to hear. The House was considering the Coal You look like a graduate. I agree. Mines Labour Welfare Fund (Amendment) 00 Bill, 1980. During the course of the discussion, Shri Kalyan Roy referring to the Special Interruption Minister's reply, observed as follows:- As soon as the Minister of Civil "I know you are very fond of Aviation Shri A. P. Sharma finished reply to Shakespeare. He writes in r acbeth: lit a question regarding Feeder Air Service for is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound Himachal Pradesh, and Smt. Usha Malhotra and fury and signifying nothing'." stood up to ask a supplementary thereon, Shri VLltram Mahajan, the concerned Shri Piloo Mody shouted:- Minister retorted as follows:- "Next Question?" "That is what Mr. Kalyan Roy normally does." GO Smt. Usha Malhotra retorted:-

S.paaking Without The Subject "What do you mean? Since when have you become the Chairman?" VICE-CHA .•.RMAN (S"JRI A.G. K' LKARNI): In my college days I remember, t:1ere used Mr. Chairman thereupon observed:- t'J be an elccution competition of speaking "This is a special interruption for you." 00 46 47 Spill Over The Charm Thing Of Beauty is Jo)' Forever Dr. (SmL) Najma Heptulla. while Vlhen the question of election of Deputy replying to the felicitations offered to her on Chairman was being taken up and Shri M0 S. her election as Deputy Chairman said as Gurupadaswamy while objecting to the failure follows: - of the Ruling Party to arrive at a concensus with the opposition on a mutually agreed II Mr, Prime Minister has said that I candidate for Deputy Chairman. observed might spill over. So if I have any inter alia:- charm or if I could have developed some. influence. I would definitely like to spill 11 I know, Sir, a thing of beauty is a joy over to not only win over the hearts but also the heads of the people near forever. Dr. Najma is a beautiful Member of the House. If the Ruling Party wanted whom you have brought me to sit. II * beauty we also could have given beauty 00 from here. II (referring to Opposition

Benches) 0

Mr. Chairman thereupon said;-

"I do not know whether the other side is aware of that. II

Subsequently. while felicitating Dr. (SmL) Najma Heptulla on her election. the Leader of the House (Shri Vishwanath Pratap Singh) reacted as follows:-

II Mr. Gurupadaswamy. said if it were a question of beauty. they could also have presented one. If that were to be the terms of negotiations. perhaps I would have entered into it earlier. II 00 *When not presiding. Deputy Chairman occupies a seat next. to the leader of the largest group in the Opposition. 48 49

Understanding Of Marx Unique Felicitations To Deputy Chairman On His Election SHRI KALYAN ROY: I vms studying in the in 1949-50 •.• After Shri Shyam Lal Yadav was elected as the Deputy Chairman of the Rajya Sabha, VICE-CHAIRMAN (SHRI R, RAMAKRISHNAN): members belonging to various political parties and groups in the House started extending Shame. their felicitations to him. Thereupon the SHRI KALYAN ROY: In fact. they should be following exchanges between the Chairman and Shri Piloo Mody took place, ashamed because they exposed themselves. It was there that I understood how Marx was SHRI PILOO MODY: Mr, Chairman, Sir, to correct. begin with. I must express my regret. that 00 on this occasion you have behaved exactly as Mr. Shyam Lal Yadav in permitting Mr. Sharma. before you allowed me to speak.

MR. CHAIRMAN: You represent only 15. He represents so many more.

SHRI PILOO MODY: It does not go by numbers over here. I have been trying to tell you this for a very long time.

MR. CHAIRMAN: If it went by weight, there is another person I should have asked.

SHRI PILOO MODY: I am very conscious of it. And if it went by brains also certainly the Opposition will be first.

MR. CHAIRMAN: You would have lost on many fronts then.

SaRI PILOO MODY: As I told you aarlier, I have no fronts. I am round. Now with your permission. I beg to move a vote of 50 51

J congratulations to my friend. Shri Shyam Lal Weight Reducing Yadav, on having come and sat with us in spite of being in the bad company of those During supplementaries on a Starred gentlemen and ladies. yes, I see you Saroj ~* Question Shri A•G• Kulkarni made the Well I never forget you. I have no doubt in following observation: my mind that my good friend, Shri Shyam Lal Yadav will continue to be as partisan as II I will tell you why particularly my he was in the past, But I will only plead friend Mr. Manubhai Patel is so much with him that now that I have moved closer / interested in . Sir. it is I will be able to extend a certain 'amount of because there is a weakness. His wife physical control over him. if not moral is going to the weight reducing ashram pressure ••• and Mr, Piloo Mody also goes to the weight reducing ashram. That is why MR. CHAIRMAN: I think something of you he likes Bangalore. may get rubbed off. Mr. Chairman thereupon said:- SHRI PILOO MODY: I hope a great deal will rub off. my regret is that there is no chair "He can refer to Mr, Mody twice over next to you ••• but do not refer to a wife here." 00 MR. CHAIRMAN: I would not sit here then.

SHRI PILOO MODY: I want to assure my good friend, neighbour and colleague that I wish him very happy times in the Chair with the least amount of acrimony and warn him that if he does not behave himself. when he returns to this Chair J I will sit on him. 00

* Refers to Kumari Saroj Khaparde. - " . I ,r 8' ,! I.

HTER MOMENTS IN TH:~ RAJYASABHA .'~~a.31'

RA:J~L." -A SUPPLEMENT LIGH T E R MOM E N T S . IN THE RAJYA SABHA

- A Supplement

\

RAJYA SABHASECRETARIAT . .1986

"It" II 32-8.3J LIGHTER MOMENTS IN THE RAJYA SABHA !<- -1- L RL-2

1st Impression July, 1985 I: 2nd Impression August, 1985, PRE F ACE TOT H E Supplement May, 1986 SUP P L E MEN T

'.,1 A booklet entitled "Lighter Moments in n b'l0 L.brl.ry ). ~l). \";" the Rajya Sabha" was brought out in July l••:1J yo. ~ 5-0-"10 ~N' No .. " )"",\" . 1985 containin g instances of wit and humour •, - •• ( I ~ •.. . . culled out from the proceedings of the Rajya Lib. NO'''o'r'li:~'q ••. Sabha. The publication proved to be an natel . ~...... ••• instant success. It was received enthusiastically by the members and got rave reviews in the press. The popularity of the booklet could well be gauged by the fact that the first print-run was exhausted barely within a month's time obliging us to go in for a reprint.

As promised in the maiden issue. a 'Supplement' to the "Lighter Moments" has ,." I been brought out containing instances of wit - ready. quick and nimble - sallies. humour. ripostes. mirthful exchanges and pleasantries from the proceedings of the Rajya Sabha during its 135th and 136th Sessions i. e. the monsoon and winter sessions of 1985. These instances. as in the' previous edition. have been arranged alphabetically. with suitable headings and appropriate narratives where necessary. Where the key sentences are in Published by . the original have been reproduced Secretary-General, Rajya Sabha followed by a running English thereof. I hope members will find them tranquilising, equalising, interesting and solvent in which tension in the House is PRE F ACE TOT H E dissolved. If there are interesting instances FIRST EDITION of humour in the possession of any member or Ii if they have suggestions for improvement, the same may kindly be communicated to Shri M.C. Banerjee, Deputy Director in the Rajya Humour in Parliament makes an Sabha Secretariat for incorporation in the interesting subject of study. In future edition of the publication. parliamen tary democracy based on party system, Parliamen t often functions under great stress and strain and the atmosphere in the House for part of the day remains surcharged. But even in the midst of , confron tation, one comes across instances of Secre tary -General. wit, wisdom, and amusing remarks. Most of these are made in a lighter vein and serve as oases, as it were, in the dry desert of NEWDELHI; verbal duels. Non~ of these exchanges are The 12th May. 1986 pre-rehearsed or pre-meditated and that is precisely why they are so good. They are the products of lively and vivacious minds reacting instantly to a particular situation; words often uttered by persons who could normally claim no particular ability to be witty. Cutting across the party lines or political differences these crisp observations often serve the purpose of lightening the atmosphere in the House which otherwise could be serious and tension-ridden. Without these, the debate and proceedings of the House would be sterile indeed.

'"A few such instances of witty, pawky and drolly statements have been culled out from the proceedings of the Rajya Sabha and

I' A cup of good coffee

included in this booklet. I hope members While Shri R. Ramakrishnan rose to would find them interesting. Members are speak on the Coffee (Amendment) Bill, 1985, also requested that in case they are in the following witty exchanges took place in possession of any interesting instances of the House. humour or wit in the Rajya Sabha, or if they have any suggestion for improvement they SHRI R. RAMAKRISHNAN: Madam Deputy rnay kindly be passed on to Shri M.C. Chairman, I am speaking on this Bill for two Banerjee, Deputy Director, Rajya Sabha reasons, Firstly, I represent this August Secretariat so that the same could be House on the Coffee Board. incorporated in the next issue of this publications which is proposed to be brought THE DEPUTY CHAIRMAN: You can brew it out at periodic intervals. very well.

SHRI R. RAMAKRISHNAN: Thank you very SUDARSHANAGARWAL, much, Madam, for the. compliment. Secretary -General SHRI JAGESH DESAI: You can give us some NEWDELHI; coffee. The 1st July, 1985 SHRI R. RAMAKRISHNAN: I will give you something better now... for the sake of the Secretary-General's Lighter Moments in the Rajya Sabha. I start with how President Tito of Yugoslavia described good coffee should be. He said, 11 A cup of good coffee-it is a cup that cheers--should be as hot as the ,I Sahara, as dark as the new moon light and II-pardon me, Madam-11 as sweet as sin! 11 00 A rose remains a rose, call it by any name

During supplementaries to' a Starred Question on the recommendations of the Joint meeting of Chief Justice, Chief Ministers and Law Ministers, the following interesting exchange took place: l> 2 3

SHRI PARVATHANENI UPENDRA:..... And Minister) earlier regarding setting up of Rail the Government, in its anxiety to find Coach Factory in Kapurthala (), committed judges, are delaying the advised the latter "to add his weight in the appointment of new judges. I would like to right place." * know from the hon. Minister when will he fill up, the existing vacancies so that the heavy Thereupon, the following repartee took pendency of cases in courts may be reduced. place in the House:

SHRI ASOKE KUMAR SEN: I am sorry I have THE DEPUTY CHAIRMAN: I thought you not been able to disillusion Mr. Reddy of his were suggesting to him to drop weight. committed ideas of having committed judges. I have to say very emphatically. ,. SI-IRI MADHAVRAO SCINDIA: Madam, I would have been open to misunderstanding. SHRI PARVATHANENI UPENDRA: Sir, let him 00 correct my name. Age is a quality of mind SHRI ASOKE KUMAR SEN: I am sorry, I While participating in 2 debate on the apologise. Mr. Upendra is the leader of his University Grants Commission (Amendment) party, I know. Bill, 1985, Shri Ramchandra Bharadwaj, ,f while agreeing with the age limit of 65 years MR. CHAIRMA~I: It is a very serious mistake. for the Chairman of the UGC, suggested that the tenure of educationists should be SHRI ASOKE KUMAR SEN: Yes, it is a very extended upto 70 years of age, provided the serious mistake and my profuse apologies. But persons concerned had been medically Mr. Upendra remains Mr. Upendra, by declared fit, because with growing years whatever name he is called. As Shakespeare they become more and more accomplished and has said, a rose remains a rose, call it by, experts in their respective fields. any name, and even if we call it by some other name, it remains a ;rose. And so Mr. The Deputy Chairman [Dr. (Smt. ) Upendra will remain a rose always for us. Najma Heptulla] thereupon quipped: 00 Adding and dropping weight "Age is a quality of mind." 00

Shri Madhavrao Scindia J Minister of State in the Ministry of Railways, while answering * (Shri Vishvajit Prithvijit Singh is a member to the point raised by Shri Vishvajit Prithvijit with a hevy built) Singh on the statement made (by the C>

);.

, ' 4 5 1 Application for Ministership full answer. After that I will allow you. As soon as the Leader of the House, I have been allowing you, but only after he finishes. You prevent him from Shri Vishwanath Pratap Singh had finished giving an answer. It is not correct. introduction of new Minister to the House, You please wait. II the following repartee took place:- Shri Madhavrao Scindia, SHRI R. MOHANARANGAM: The House is full Minister of State in the Department of Railways, of Ministers. They outnumber the Members. thereupon, quipped: Not even one from this side.

"Both are bearded* lions. II SHRI VISHWANATH PRATAP SINGH: You can 00 propose the name; we can consider it. Bitter to the last THE DEPUTY CHAIRMAN: Mr. Mohanarangam might propose his own name. ~he House wa.s discussing a Calling AttentIon. on ~he Immediate need to pay SHRI K. MOHANAN: You send an remuneratIve prIces to sugarcane growers for application; they will consider It. their produce in view of fall in production of 00 sugar. Speaking on the subject, Shri M. Kadharsha observed:- Bearded lions "Madam Deputy Chairman, sugar is The members -'. were putting sweet, so also the Minister, but not the supplementaries on a Starred Question sugar policy of the Government. It is bitter to the last. II regarding purchase of Airbus in place of 00 Boeing 757. Shri Suresh Kalmadi was not satisfied with the reply given by Shri Black beauty , Minister of State in the Department of Civil Aviation to a certain While participating in a short duration supplementary and was repeatedly discussion on the statement regarding report interrupting the Minister to extract a of the National Institute of Public Finance satisfactory answer. The Chairman then put and Policy on "Aspects of the Black Economy an end to their verbal exchange by telling [;> Shri Kalmadi: *Both Shri Suresh Kalmadi and Shri Jagdish "You must allow the Minister to give his Tytler sport beards. [;> 6 7 and so no in India", Shri Nirmal Chatterjee remarked: buildings without foundation bottom ... (Interruptions) ..• 00 "Mr. Vice Chairman, Sir, despite quite a beautiful couplet in Bengali literature, Bulky drug a free translation of which means - While putting supplementaries on a If black you consider to be that Starred Question members were concentrating bad, why do you weep, Madam, on the issue of production of various drugs when your hair turns grey? by the IDPL. The Deputy Chairman [Dr. (Smt.) Najma Heptulla] called Shri Vishvajit black is considered to be beautiful in Prithvijit Singh to put the last certain circles in our country. But supplementary thus: presently, Sir, the mood of the House seems to reflect that we are all SHRI VISHVAJIT PRITHVIJIT SINGH: The concerned with black income, black last drug. wealth and the report on black money This triggered off the following mirthful and black wealth." 00 repartee: .I SHRI : That is a bulky ! Bottomless construction drug.* . SHRI VISHVAJIT PRITHVIJIT SINGH: During the course of supplementaries on Madam, yes, it is a bulky drug and it is a a question regarding construction of bulky question. defective houses by the DDA, the following drolly interlude took place: THE DEPUTY CHAIRMAN: Let us see how effective it is. SHRI M. KADHARSHA: Madam, there is SHRI VASANT SATHE: We will get it from rampant corruption in the DDA from top to the basic stage. bottom. SHRI VISHVAJIT PRITHVIJIT SINGH: It is THE DEPUTY CHAIRMAN: Why talk of top? not basic ~tage. It is an intermediate stage. 00 We are talking of the bottom ... (Interruptions) .•. *The reference is to Shri Vishvajit Prithli"':- SHRI K. MOHANAN: They are constructing jit Singh who is known for his obesity. [> 8 9

Car Vs. truck Change of Portfolio When a Starred Question. regarding While participating in the debate on the restrictions on resale of vehicles was being Indira Gandhi National Open University Bill, answered in the House, Shri R. 1985, Shri R. Ramakrishnan inadvertently Mohanarangam enquired from the Minister referred to the Education Minister as Home whether there was any proposal on the part Minister. This led to the following exchange: of the Government to lift the ban and give an opportunity to the Members of Parliament THE DEPUTY CHAIRMAN: Education I to register their names for the purchase of Minister. Do you want him to become Minister j Maruti vehicles, The Chairman observed that for Home Affairs? j although the supplementary was not relevant to the main question, he would allow the SHRI R. RAMAKRISHNAN:I am sorry, yes, same as it might be of interest to the Education Minister. I hope he will get a members, The following repartee, thereafter, change of portfolio after he delivers the took place in the House: goods. 00 SHRI ARIF MOHAMMADKHAN: I do not know if Mr, Mohanarangam will be personally Coffee at tea time interested in the Maruti car which is a small As soon as the Minister of State in the car. Ministry of Commerce and Supply (Shri P. A. MR. CHAIRMAN: No deals can be st.ruck Sangma) finished his speech moving the here. motion for the consideration of the Coffee (Amendment) Bill, 1985, the following SHRI R. MOHANARANGAM:Mr. Chairman, I know fully well that the Maruti car will not pleasantries were exchanged: accommodate me*,.. Even the Ambassador car will not accommodate me. (Interruptions) SHRI JAGESH DESAI: There are only two Where is my guru ?** He is absent. •. persons who take coffee and both are Ministers. Therefore, this may be passed MR. CHAIRMAN: Please supply Mr. without any discussion. Mohanarangam with a truck. 00 THE DEPUTY CHAIRMAN: Though it is tea *Shri Mohanarangam is a very hefty member. time, we do not mind having coffee. **The reference here is presumably to Shri SHRI DIPEN GHOSH: Let the Ministers serve Vishvajit Prithvijit Singh, who is known for coffee. his corpulency. 00 10 11 Comedy of errors Concentrating too much on lady Member

In the course of supplementaries to a The House was having a short duration Starred Question, a member, Shri Kailash discussion on the statement on textile policy. I Pati Mishra sought to put, a supplem:nta::y While Minister of Supplies and Textiles, Shri !II on floods. The Chairman did not permIt him Singh was speaking, a to put his question on the ground that the member, Miss Jayalalitha intervened. Another main question related to . The member, Shri Ramchandra Bhardwaj raised a member was supported by another member point of order on this. The Minister replied who argued that as per the Hindi version of that, although' no member has the right to the question, it pertained to 'floods'. intervene while the Minister is speaking, he Thereupon, the following mirthful exchange wanted to give this right to the lady took place: member.

MR. CHAIRMAN: There is a comedy of Thereafter, the following pleasantaries errors. The English version o,f t?e qu~stion were exchanged: deals with drought, and the HmdI verSIOn, I am told, deals with floods. Therefore, the SHRI CHANDRA SHEKHAR SINGH: I am question I have before me is about drought. referring to the hon. lady Member. You are I do not know in what language it was put trying to compete with the hon. lady originally. About floods you can put a Member. separate question. DR. SHANTI G. PATEL: If you want to SHRI BDTA SINGH: Fully submitting to your compete, I will leave the field open for you. ruling, we are prepared for floods also. You are capable.

SHRI B. SATYANARAYANREDDY: Shall I SHRI MADHAVRAO SCINDIA: You are put my supplementary on drought or on concentrating too much on the lady Member. ? 00

MR. CHAIRMAN: In view of all the noise Contributions of Modern Science that has been made, you may put supplemen taries on flood,: fire, drought, While speaking on the Appropriation everything. (No.5) Bill, 1985 Shri Mostafa Bin Quasem 00 inadvertently addressed the Chair* as [> *The Deputy Chairman, Dr. (Smt.) Najma Heptulla, had been presiding over the House when Shri Quasem had started his speech. 12 13

11 Madam11 when the Vice-Chairman Shri Chimanbhai Mehta was in the Chair. The ~ricket: Smt. Margaret Alva, Minister of following exchange came as a sequel to that .:.>t2.tem the Departments of Youth Affairs and Sports and Women's welfare retorted as inadvertence. follows: AN HON. MEMBER:Not 'Madam', but 'Sir'. 11 Cricket does not need it. Weare This is one of talking about those who neea' 1••'t- SHRI NIRMAL CHATTERJEE: (I the contributions of Modern science - the nterruptions) The hon. Member would transformation of sex. also agree that Ivladhavrao Scindia does 00 not, need money to sponsor sports in lI.aahya Pradesh. 11 Debate on Sports or Madhavrao Scindia ,Shri Madhavrao Scindia had the final During the course of supplementaries on say In the matter with the followincy trump a Starred Question regarding new talent in card: b sports, Shri N.K.P. Salve enquired whether Government were willing to give financial Ills sports being debated or is help to good cricket associations such as the Madhavrao Scindia being debated?1l one in under the 00 presidentship of Madhavrao Scindia so that they could find new talent. Shri S. W. Dhabe Dinner ••nd breCJttfast fer fi.embers commented that those associations did not need money. One member thereupon quipped: The House was having a combined de~ate ox: the Futwah - Islampur Light "Madhavrao Scindia does not need any RaIlway Lme (Nationalisation) Bill, 1985 and money. 11 th e Appropriation (Railways) No. 5 Bill, 1g85. After a member had finished his The Chairman wittily commented: sp~ech'T the Deputy Chairman [Dr. (Smt., IIMr. Salve, you are a lawyer. If they NaJma H~ptullaJ proposed to scrap the lunch give to Madhavrao Scindia, they will r~cess m order to enable the House to say, according to law, a fraudulent dIspose of the long list of business slated f~r the day. This led to the fol1owinrr preference. 11 mIrthful exchange: eo

Later on, Shri Salve remarked that not THE DEPUTY CHAIR"lI'""' _1\ ••• ": \"',e are not having a rupee of support has been given to lunch today. t> 14 15

SHRI D. HEERACHAND: Then you can give Disaster Developli1erit Programme me more time. While speaking on a Call Attention THE DEPUTY CHAIRMAN: We are scrapping Motion on the situation arising out of floods, lunch time in order to sit till 9 0 Iclock. drought and other natural calamities in various parts of the country, Shri M.S. SHRI D. HEERACHAND: You take away Gurupadaswamy pointed out a discrepancy in lunch time and don't give more time ... the statement of the Minister of State in the Department of Agriculture and Cooperation THE DEPUTY CHAIRMAN: I do not mind if (Shri Yogendra Makwana) in the following you want to have you your dinner here •.. words:

SHRI MADHAVRAO SCINDIA: Madam, ladies "However, while reading the statement, are food givers. I have found an expression which is rather very amusing. In the same page THE DEPUTY CHAIRMAN: I will provide you - page 5 - in the last paragraph, the dinner as well as breakfast if the House sits statement says that there is going to be for longer time. 00 a "Disaster Development Programme! I! What is this "Disaster Development Programme?1! I do not understand." Disadvantages of being non-vegetarian This led theto following witty During the supplementaries to a exchange: question on the subject of fish caught by foreign chartered trawlers, the following SHRI YOGENDRA MAKWANA: It is Drought interesting exchange took place: Prone Area Development Programme.

SHRI NIRMAL CHATTERJEE: Sir, I am a SHRI M.S. GURUPADASWAMY: Here it is &trict non-vegetarian. "Disaster Development Programme. I!

!viR. CHAIRMAN: Don't say that. Otherwise SHRI YOGENDRA MAKWANA:It is a mistake. you will be denied vegetables in our dinners and lunches. SHRI M.S. GURUPADASWAMY:I am glad it is only a mistake! SHRI NIRMAL CHATTERJEE: If those are 00 replaced by non -vegetarian things, I have Docter good c,t (ii"!;l:,c.~is, bad c:t ;:.r",:zcrip!ion no objection. 00 In the course of supplementaries on a C> 17 16 problems faced by the farmers. In this Starred Question regarding review of context the member sarcastically remarked: performance of public sector undertakings,

Shri P. Upendra v,as trying to hammer home '" .~ ~ '~""C'\eI.~ .~ '~I!"~\ ~\1i>\ a point that while the Minister of Industry ••.• 0..... (Shri N.D. Tiwari) identified the reasons for .~~ ~~ ~ -.:::x{a;\~\ ~ ~~ , '~ ""& - ~- the losses incurred by some enterprises, he -W ~C\'lC\\ ~ \ Q'\\C<\,,","~'f\~,{~<\'\-\~,,;Il:c.\ ~ did not suggest anything to solve them. In this context he characterised the rl.inister's ~ \ C\iS ~ ~ ~tc\"'~ ¥ ~~\ ~ statement thus: Q\J~\ ~ ~ ~ am '~~A\~ ~ ~ ~ \~' liThe Minister sounded like a doctor ~ CSJ\'A\C\\ '~ •• , •• ~ good at diagnosis but bad at [A cat can never be relied upon to prescription. II guard against pilferage of milk nor can a tiger play a shepherd to the goat. A little while later, still not satisfied But the Government has the tendency with the Minister's clarifications, Shri of doing things in the wrong way. It Uoendra stated that he was convinced about engages cat for protecting milk and his comments on the Minister. However, the makes tiger tend to goat.] Chariman came to the Ministers' rescue and 00 rebutted the member in a lighter vein thus: .Double century by Minister ~J::.'\.~~~tit;c:.theprescriptionfailed. What can he SHRI R. RAMAKRISHNAN: Madam, before do?" 00 you adjourn the House (for lunch), I wish to compliment the honourable Minister. * I know Doing things the .!rong V'lCJ)' he -is a cricketer. Yesterday he was the opening batsman. He piloted this Criminal While participating in the debate on the Law Amendment BilL Overnight he continued Agricultural and Precessed Food Products in the Question Hour. Now he is continuing Expert Cess Bill, 1985, Shri Hukmdeo with this and after lunch he is going to Narayan Yadav was trying to hammer home a move a motion on the UPSC reports. So he is point that the various welfare projects making a double century. So I want to launched by the Government for the farmer compliment him on his achievement. 00 did not serve their cause because the personnel ::-esponsible for implementation were *SlJri K.P.S,inglJ Deo, Nillister of State in the elitist and have absolutely no idea about the Department of Personnel and . [> 18 19

Easy time for Ministers rang out. Shri Kaushik requested for three more minutes, to which the Deputy Chairman During Question Hour on a particular assented. The following exchange, sitting a number of members (as many as thereafter, took place: six) whose questions were listed for o:al answers, were absent when called upon oy SHRI M.P. KAUSHIK:•. :rhis bell gives a the Chairman to put their question. complete full stop, not even a semicolon. Thereupon, the Chairman quipped: THE DEPUTY CHAIRMAN: I wish it has the I1Ministers are having a very easy same effect on everyone. For some people it time. 11 acts as an incentive! 00 00

Easy way to prosperity Elephantine Love-making

During the course of supplementaries to The House was having a debate on the a question regarding alleged favouritism present international situation. While shown by some in granting loans to a participating in the debate,. Shri Jaswant near relativ~ of the Chief Minister, Singh characterised the debates on foreign the following witty interjection took place: policy in a lighter vein as follows:- • SHRI M.S. GURUPADASWAMY:Mr Chairman, 11 I cannot help reflecting that Sir, I think it is very easy to become whenever I have been a witness to prosperous in this country if one is lucky to discussions and debates on any foreign marry the daughter of a Chief Minister. policy - and I have had occasion to say (Interruptions). It looks like that. Sir, .•. this earlier I am reminded of love-making between elephants: it is MR. CHAIRMAN: Have you any regrets now? always conducted at a very high level, it is accompanied by a great deal of SHRI M.S. GURUPADASWAMY:Sir, I and noise, and we don't come to know of you are ruled out because of age ..• the results for at least two and a half 00 years! 11 00 Effect of Time Bell Extra-ordinary appetite Shri M.P. Kaushik was speaking on the Indira Gandhi National Open University Bill, In the midst of discussion on a 1985. As his time was finished, time-bell Government motion on the Seventh Five Year C> Plan, Shri Sitaram Kesri, Minister of State in C> .L

20 21 the Ministry of Parliamentary Affairs Shri humorously remarked: requested the Deputy Chairman [Dr. (Sm~.) Najma Heptullal not to adjourn the House tor 1I0ne of our biggest problems still is lunch-break and to continue the discussion. that of population. Of course, it does This led to the following interesting not affect our friends across the exchange between the Deputy Chairman and Benches because their population seems Shri Nirmal Chatterjee: to be dwindling." (Interruptions).

THE DEPUTY CHAIRMAN: So this is agreed. Shri Sat Paul Mittal, thereupon, So, Mr. Chatterjee, there are three minutes quipped: left out of your time which I give you. IIThey are implementil1g one programme at least. II SHRI NIRMAL CHATTERJEE: Instead of going for lunch, I consume the lunch hour Shri Rajiv Gandhi added: here. IIAtleast in the two Houses. II THE DEPUTY CHAIRMAN: I never knew you Shri P. Upendra had the last say in the matter when he retorted: had such an appetite. 00 IIToday's results* indicate otherwise. II Fair in Beauty & Treatment 00

During the course of discussion on the Feudal God Punjab Appropriation (No.3) Bill, 1985, the following exchange took place: While participating in a Call Attention Motion on the situation arising out of floods, SHRI PARVATHANENIUPENDRA: Madam, I drought and other natural calamities in thought you are fair not only in beauty but various parts of the coun try, Shri R. in treatment also. Mohana~angam w?o was trying to bring home the pomt that It was not possible for the THE DEPUTY CHAIRMAN: I am very fair. I Governm.ent o~ to stop the devastating rams and cyclonic storms and will give you five minutes. 00 . t> *The reference is to results of the elections Family Planning in real sense held in Assam and bye-elections in several par" ts of the country on 16th December 1985. While intervening in the debate on the Seventh Five Year Plan, the Prime Minister, J> 22 23

warn all the people living near the numerous The Frime Minister, Shri Rajiv Gandhi lakes to vacate the areas, remarked that immediately quipped: o Lord Varuna - the rain-god did not ev~n h" 1 d t forewarn them in their dreams. T IS e 0 "Mr. Chairman, Sir, the team we field the following exchange: depends on the opposition we face." 00 SHRI K. MOHANAN: God is cruel. Flood of agitation SHRI R. MOHANARANGAM: God is cruel, with the blessings of our Mohanan. What to do. The House was discussing the flood situation in the country. While speaking on DEPUTY CHAIRMAN: He has influence there the same, the Minister of Irrigation and also? Power, Shri B. Shankaranand commen ted: SHRI K. MOHANAN: That is a feudal God. "An Hon'ble Member asked about the 00 floods in Gujarat. His complaint was: There is drought in Gujarat. Where Fielding team depending on opposition comes the flood? I do not know whether The Minister of State in the Ministry of the Hon'ble Member has ever known what has happened on the 19th of July External Affairs, Shri Khurshid Alam Khan, was answering supplementaries to Starred in Ahmedabad and Baroda, I hope they are in Gujarat. II Questions relating to Foreign Secretary's visit to and Thimpu talks on the Shri Shankar Sinh Vaghela, thereupon Tamil issue. Shri Jaswant Singh t~ok quipped as follows: objection to it saying that the PrIme Minister being there, may handle awkward III was in Gujarat. question's himself rather than fielding the There is no complaint about flood. But junior team. agitation flood is there. II 00 Chairman thereupon remarked: Foundation less Houses and Heartlessness "It is for the Ministers to decide. You cannot say who should answer. II During the course of supplementaries on l> a Starred Question regarding construction of l> i I 24 25 i I defective houses by the DDA, the following Gandhis Everywhere .1 witty exchange took place: While taking part in the debate on the SHRIMATIUSHA MALHOTRA: These houses Government Motion on the Reports of the are without foundation. Please donIt be Commissioner and Commission on Scheduled heartless. These are foundation-less houses. Castes and Scheduled Tribes Shri Chaturanan Mishra inter alia stated that in SHRI ABDUL GHAFOOR: I am sure I am not Harijans are being killed everyday by going to break your hear:t because hon. the private armies and he felt that if this is also sitting here and he situation continues there would be no other will take note of it. Therefore, I am not alternative for the Harijans but to take up going to do that. 00 arms. He then commented with sarcasm: 4 10 ~ ~ ~ ~''"i:\C\1 ~ ~ ~ ~ From Himalayas to Ooty ~ ~ ~ '\l\ti\c.;\\ .~ ~ -">\'(,\'(,\ Shri G. Varadaraj put the following ~ ~ ~ ~ S\C ,5\~'5>C\1z... ~ , ;: supplementary on a Starred Question ): regarding development of some parts of the -5\x,,{~ ~, ~~"" ~ ~ ~ SlC.~- , Himalayas as Tourist Resorts: ~ ~-ux~

Shri Chaturanan Mishra replied: Gold for Min ister I Lemon for P. A. In the midst of a discussion on a (t~ ~ ~ ~~<\\ \ '¥- ~ ;~ Private Members' Resolution for establishment ~.

During the course of a Calling Attention While the Hon. Member Shri H. discussion on the delay in assenting to Bills Hanumanthappa had started seeking passed by State Legislatures and reserved clarifications on the statement made by the by Governors for the consideration of the Minister of State in the Department of President, some members suggested a Rail:vays, Shri Madhavrao Scindia, regarding time-limit to be prescribed in the settmg up of Rail Coach Factory at Constitution within which the President Kapurthala (Punjab), some lady members had should give his assent. When Shri V. gathered together behind the Minister's seat. Gopalsamy was about to start seeking They Were talking amongst themselves which clarifications on the Minister's statement, the distracted the Minister's attention, and Deputy Chairman taking a cue from the thereupon the followin g repartee took place: suggestion referred above, commented in a lighter ft:em- vein: SHRI lv'LADHAVRAOSCnmIA: Madam ..•.

"While we are discussing the time-limit THE DEPUTY CHAIRMAN: He has not on the Bills, we will have to put a finished yet. time-limit on the speeches."

Piqued by it Shri Gopalsamy said: SHRI MADHAVRAO SCINDIA: Madam, I seek your protection. These five Hon. lady "If you want me to speak, I will speak. Members are harassing me. Whenever I rise, immediately you say ,I something and I lose the mood to speak. THE DEPUTY CHAIRMAN: I would request It happens everyday. It happened last the Hon. lady Members to go to their seats. time also when I took only five minutes (Interruptions) ." SHRI H. HANUMANTHAPPA: Fortunately, a The Deputy Chairman had the last word. She lady Member is in the Chair, quipped: THE DEPUTY CHAIRMAN: I think because of "I guillotine him with a smile." the lady Members the lv'rinister- wants to run his train faster. co 00 30 31

Healthy Trend general complaint of paying thousands of rupees every year for excess calls, there After the Law Minister moved a motion are two instances when money was deducted for concurring in the recommendation of the from my salary. In the first instance I was Lok Sabha that the Rajya Sabha do join in informed that 'You have made a phonogram the Joint Committee on the Lok Pal Bill, call to Bombay costing Rs.124/-I asked them 1985, some members expressed concern over to send me the text. They did not do this. I the non-inclusion of a lady member on the went on \vriting and they quietly sent me a Joint Committee. In the midst of the cheque of Rs.122/- after deducting Rs.2/-0n discussion the following interesting exchange the second occasion again Rs. 52/- was took place: billed against me and the amount was deducted from my salary. I made a protest SHRI R. RAMAKRISHNAN Madam, I just and again after deducting Rs.2/- they sent want to say that the House has got a me a cheque. beautiful Deputy Chairman in you and we have got a beautiful Minister of State for MR. CHAIRMAN: You seems to be very Parliamentary Affairs in Mrs. Margaret Alva, lucky. but still they forget ladies. SHRI INDRADEEP SINHA: ....•• I would like DEPUTY CHAIRMAN: Thank you very much to know from the Hon. Minister what action for the compliments .••• (Interruptions) I am has been taken in pursuance of my specific very happy to note that not only the lady complaints against specific officers of the Members but the gents also are bothered department. about the representation of ladies. It is a very healthy trend. SHRI RAM NIWAS MIRDHA: .•.•.... As regards glvmg him rebate on a number of SHRI PARVATHANENI UPENDRA Lip occasions, I can assure him that we will sympathy. continue doing' so whenever he makes a 00 complaint.

How to earn rebate MR. CHAIRMAN: Not only to himj you must give t.o others also. The Minister of Communications was 00 answering to supplementaries to a Starred Question relating to disconnection of STD If wishes wet'e hot'ses facilities. Referring to STD calls, Shri The Prime Minister, 5hri Rajiv Gandhi Indradeep Sinha observed as follows: was speaking by way of intervention to the SHRI INDRADEEP SINHA: Apart from the debate on a Government motion on the C> C> 32 33

Seventh Five Year Plan, The members of the The Chairman, thereupon, remarked: treasury benches cheered the Prime Minister's reply by repeated thumping of 11 That is why their salaries are being desks. A member, Shri P. Upendra increased. You have to vote it today. 11 interrupted the Prime Minister by saying: An Hon'ble member retorted: When you are here, they get all the IIYou are also included in that. 11 vigour. 11 * 00 This led to the following witty exchange: Influence of Narcotics

SHRI SAT PAUL MITTAL: You get confused hecause of our thumping? The Minister of State in the Ministry of Finance sought to move the motion for SHRI NIRMAL CHATTERJEE: I ",ish it were consideration of the Narcotic Drugs and a little more. Psychotropic Substances Bill, 1985 amidst lot of interruptions and commotion in the House. SHRI RAJIV GANDHI: Well, if wishes were At this point the following repartee took horses, I do not know what you will be. place: 00 THE DEPUTY CHAIRMAN: Well, is this a walk-out on the Narcotics Bill or what? Increasing Ministers' Selaries SHRI NIRMAL CHATTERJEE: Under the Dr.'. Shyam Sunder Mohapatra put the influence of narcotics. following supplementary on a Starred 00 Question regarding schemes for welfare of children: Interested in Zoo

11 Sir according to the Minister's reply, While seeking clarifications on the every child gets Rs. 150, then oil, then I> soap and what not. I do not know if the Minister's own grandchildren have *On this day (20-12-85) the House passed a so much in these days of . 11 I> batch of five bills increasing inter alia the sa1ar ies and al.lowances of Niniste--;:;;- and. Officers of Parliament. 34 35 statement made by Shri B .R. Bhagat, Minister of External Affairs on Prime THE DEPUTY CHAIRMAN: Five minutes I Minister's visit to Vietnam and Japan, Shri agree ••..• (Interruptions) Jaswant Singh made the following introductory remarks: SHRI PARVATHANENI UPENDRA: She is very liberal when she is not "Madam, among other things which I hungry .• ~... (Interruptions) .... want to say about the Prime Minister's 00 visit, which have been underlined by • various other colleagues on this side, is Living Among Animals about his visit to the Tokyo Zoo. From the statement of the hon. Minister for While participating in a Call Attention External Affairs it appears that he did motion on the situation arising out of floods, not actually visit the Zoo. So, I would drought and other natural calamities in have liked to ask the Prime Minister various parts of the country, Shri Ramanand how he found the zoo and how those Yadav stated that in the flood affected two baby elephants are doing? How are areas, animals die within one hour of Asha and Daya, because it forms part consuming the grass carried by flood waters, of the Minister's statement." which fact the Deputy Chairman might not be aware of. THE DEPUTY CHAIRMAN [DR. (SMT. ) NAJh/. HEPTULLA I thereupon commented: Thereupon, the Deputy Chairman [Dr. (Smt.) Najma Heptulla] quipped: IIWell, I would be interested in it as a Zoologist. "

Pat came the reply from Shri Jaswant Singh:

IIYes, indeed. I am charmed by what (Animals have been my subject of study) you say. II 00 Shri Yadav retorted:

L'beral when not hungt')' "~~ 2>~ ~=q ~~ ~~\')

.THE DEPUTY CHAIRMAN: Okay, five more (You do live among them) mLnutes.

SHRI V. GOPALSAMY: At times I may take 00 more. [> 36 37

Luxury of having lady Members behind Motion on the Seventh Five Year Plan, a member Shri F .M. Khan interrupted the While replying to the clarifications proceedings by addressing the Deputy sought by members on the statement .made by Chairman (Dr. (Smt.) Najma Heptulla] in the him regarding setting up of a RaIl .C:>ach following manner: Factory at Kapurthala (Punjab), the MInIster of State in the Department of Railways, Shri "Madam, Itt wan 0 say someth ing. I Madha vrao Scindia said: want to place a few facts before the House. You know I have been on a 11 • • . . ..M a d am, I would like to thank the hunger-strike. " * hon. Members because it is a luxury which I enjoy on very rare occasiOI:s The Deputy Chairman retorted: that in the Railway Ministry everyone 15 congratulating the Government...... I "You then go and have your lunch. Do would like to extend my warm thanks not disturb the proceedings." and gratitude to all the hon. 00 Members ••..••• " Member turns bard Thereupon -the Deputy Chairman quipped: The House was considering the Appropriation (No.6) Bill, 1985. The , "I thought you were referring to the otherwise staid proceedings on this item had I I luxury of having five lady members its refreshing moments too when a member I behind you." * Dr. Rudra Pratap Singh welcomed the Bill I 00 and congratulated the Minister of Finance I (Shri. Vishwanath Pratap Singh) whom he Member free to have lunch descrIbed as wise with character and conviction. The member concluded his speech When Shri Pranab Mukherjee was r> speaking on the debate on a Governmen~ *The member was on a hunger strike on the Boat Club lawns protesting against some *Ear1ier, when a member (Shri H. alleged irregularities in the bye-election to Hanumanthappa) was seeking clarifications on the Lok Sabha from South Delhi Parliamentary the statement made by Shri Scindia, some lady co~stituency held on 16th December, 1985 members had gathered together behind Shri wh~ch the member fougllt as an independent Scindia's seat and were talking amongst candidate. themselves. 38 39

The Deputy Chairman [Dr. (Smt.) Najma Heptulla], thereupon, remarked in a lighter vein:

II He is not bothered about the blades, because he grows beard. * (Interruptions) I wonder if he smokes.

Shri Suresh Kalmadi replied in the same coin: . (Learn not to burn with the Lamp, "I do like smoking, of Indian brands. II Learn to smile from it. Shri N.K.P. Salve then commented: Learn not to set with the Sun, Learn to rise from it. "Madam he smokes also! II 00 One ought to ponder, Where one is placed in the nature's canvas. Minister and drug peddling

Try to be an explorer, And not a Shri Murlidhar Chandrakant Bhandare treader of beaten track.) was making a special mention on the menace 00 of drug trafficking in the country. The following repartee then took place: Member smokes Indian brand SHRI MURLIDHAR CHANDRAKANT During the course of supplementaries on BHANDARE: Madam Deputy Chairman, I want I I a Starred Question regarding foreign trade the hon. House to share with me the grave marks in foreign collaborations, Shri Suresh concern and anxiety at the growing menace Kalmadi inter alia made the following query: of drug trafficking in our country. I am -- -- particularly gratified that the hon. Finance IIHas the Government given permission Minister is present in the House because he to the makers of Rothman and has a lot to do with this peddling of drugs Chesterfield cigarettes to have a brand and smuggling of drugs .•• name, and if you have not given the permission, I would like to know what THE DEPUTY CHAIRMAN: What are you saying? action you propose to take; are you c>

going to cancel their licence? II [> * Shri Suresh Kalmadi sports a beard. 40 41

THE MINISTER OF FINANCE (SHRI district' in Maharashtra, Shl-i Suresh Kalmadi VISHWANATH PRATAP SINGH): I have to do complimented Shri N. D. Tiwari, Minister of with stopping the peddling of drugs, not Industry as follows: with the peddling of drugs. 00 liThe no-industry district policy has been entirely the baby of Mr. N.D. Minister should run faster Tiwari. In Maharashtra he is called not as Mr. N. D. Tiwari but he is called Mr. The Minister of State in the Ministry of N.LD. Tiwari. II Finance (Shri Janardhan Poojari) was not present in the House to lay papers on the In reply, Shri N. D. Tiwari stated that Table of the House. As soon as he came, the as far as his nomenclature was concerned, Chairman called upon him to apologize for whatever he was, he was at the mercy of his not being present in the House at the young colleague. appropriate time. Shri Poojari thereupon remarked: Thereupon, the Chairman, in a humorous tone, sought to give his III am sorry, Sir, I came late. Starred interpretation to Shri Kalmadi's compliments Questions were there in the Lok Sabha in the following manner for which Shri and so, I am very sorry, I could not Tiwari thanked him as having given the come. I came running. I take the correct interpretation: Parliamentary work very seriously. I came running also. II lIyou should thank him. He says you are National Industries Development Shri R. Ramakrishnan commented Minister. II 00 thereupon:

IIWesaw him running. II Minister's ignorance not greater than member's

Shri P. Upendra had the last say: During supplementaries to Starred '. Question regarding measures to control IIYou should run faster. II floods in Assam, Shri Gurudas Das Gupta 00 e?quired whet.her. the two factors, namely hIgh rate of SIltatIOn and constant failure of Minister with many nomenclatures the authorities to clear the silt and sediment were being taken into consideration while While asking supplementaries on a formulating the so-called Master Plan about Starred Question regarding a 'no-industry [> !> 42 43 which the Minister seemed to be ignorant. New Chairman

Shri B • Shankaranand immediately As the Marshal announced the arrival of reacted as follows: the Chairman in the House, Shrimati Margaret Alva, Minister of State for. "Sir, I cannot claim to have any greater Parliamentary Affairs stepped out of the ignorance than the honourable Member. Chairman's Room and entered the Chamber to (Interruptions) ." be followed a few seconds later by the Chairman. There was laughter in the House in which the Chairman also joined. The MR. CHAIRMAN:A Good reply! co following brief exchange took place:

Modern Hanuman IvlR. CHAIRMAN: Not the Minister of Parliamentary Affairs. Dr. Shyam Sundar Mohapatra prefaced his speech on the debate on the international SHRI P. UPENDRA: Some intruder. situation by paying the following encomiums to Shri B.R. Bhagat, Minister for External SHRI R. MOHANARANGAM:I thought she Affairs in the following words: was promoted.

"Mr. Vice-Chairman, Sir, the Foreign MR. CHAIRMAN:Some day in future. Minister, Mr. Bhagat, has added many 00 feathers to his cap. One feather he Nobody's b<:by added in London, another in Bahamas, the third in Washington, the fourth in While replying to the combined debate Oman, the fifth in Tokyo and then; of on the Futwah-Islampur Light Railway Line course, the last but not the least, (Nationalisation) Bill, 1985 and the credit goes to him for the India- Appropriation (Railways) No. 5 Bill, 1985 the official level talks." Minister of State in the Department of Railways made the following. humorous Shri Sitaram Kesri, Minister of State in remarks: the Ministry of Parliamentary Affairs thereupon quipped: ;.\ "I would like to clarify here that hardly anywhere in the world is the suburban "He is a Hanuman." transport the responsibility of the co l> 44 45 railways. But here we have been landed ,,~..One Hon'ble Member r~QtorteQ".. with a baby no one wants to claim. So ~q:;4 ~ ~~' ~,"-' ~ :, ~ .!f"""" . ~ ~ '¥~b&d, , or-\~ ~~~ ~ -... ~'{4\~ \\:\<=\'\1<::\ ~ ~ eL ~ ~ ~ 'g\S~\ .~ ~t ~~~~~~¥t"q"{'~ ~\,,\ ~ J ~ an"iC: ••" ~ ~ ~.~ ~ I .,~~ \~ ~ ~ ~. ~"'(\.3\H•.Cf\{~ ~:m::li\.,-~ '!l~'\!W., ~ ~.~ ~, l\~\ ~' ""dl'>\~~

~ ~ C'~4\\'" ~~,::::.\ a:;Wlu\ ~ ~~\C{~ ~ ~<~ ~.~~ ~q m.~-a.tw '. \" \\~\"X ~i\~ C\\~~ ~ '&~~~, ~.~Wh\ ~ ~ . . ,Snakes are of two types. One which ~ ~ ~ ~~.~~~~- are poisonous c.nd whose venom is C\~~\{ .~ ~ ~~~~'~

Quite a number of members had put Planning the Family supplementaries on a Starred Question relating to Ganga Basin Conference: The During a short duration discussion on Chairman then called for the next question. the situation arising out of steep rise in the Some more members wanted to put prices of essential commodities, Shri Ashwani supplementaries on the question. The r> Chairman humorously ruled out further * Shri Jagdish Tytler, Minister of State in supplementaries thus: the Department of Civil Aviation. ** Minister of State in the Department of Sur- lINo, there has been too much of face Transport. pollution. " 00 48 49

Kumar was trying to hammer home the point This led to the following interesting that Government always put the alibi of exchange: increase in population to justify price rise and that the Government's family planning SHRI N.K.P. SALVE: Your God is in China. policy was faulty. This led to the following mirthful exchange: . SHRI NIRMAL CHATTERJEE: By God I have ~'-i\<:\~\ SHRI S. W. DHABE: I would like to tell the Minister that in Kerala the prices of coconut * Reference to Shri Ashwani Kumar who is a > bachelor. 50 51 have come down and they have come down Auroville (Emergency Provisions) P.mendment from Rs.4/- to Rs.2/- per nut. Bill, 1985, Minister of Education, Shri K. C. Pant inadvertently referred to Shri Babul SHRI PARVATHANENI UPENDRA: He is Reddy as Shri Madhav Reddy. As a result, dealing with price rise and not fall in the following interesting exchange took place prIces.•I in the Eouse: 00 SHRI K.C, PANT: Madam, the han. liember, Shri Madhav Reddy spoke about. ... Hare visitor to the hCLIHl THE DEPUTY CHAIRMAN: Shri Babul R.eddy. StiRI R. RAMAKRISHNAN: I want to know whether the Textile Policy discussion will SHRI S. W. DHABE: Mr. Madhav Reddy is in conclude today and the Minister's reply will Lok Sabha. be tomorrow. Yesterday also, this point came up. The Hon'ble Minister for Parliamentary SHRI K.C. PANT: Yes, Shri Babul Reddy. I Affairs is not there. Last week •.•..•• stand corrected. There are many Reddys in both the Houses. MINISTER OF STATE IN THE MINISTRY OF PARLIAMENTARY AFFAIRS(SH~.I GULAM THE DEPUTY CHAIRMAN: There are many NABI AZAD) : I am here. ready to speak.

SHRI R. RAMAKRISHNAN: I am sorry. You SHRI S. W, DHABE: Here also we have get are a rare visitor to the House. That is why more than one Reddy. I did not notice you. 00

SHRI GHULAM NABI A2AD: I think you are Research in Corruption used to Lady Minister only. * 00 While making a special mention regarding Reddys Ready to spec,k alleged racketing in allotment of telephones in Delhi, Shri Raoof Valiullah made the following sarcastic remarks: While replying to the debate on the J> " ..••.. All the corrupt officials who are '"The reference presumably was to Shrimati thrown out of the Telephones Margaret Alva, the Minister of State for Department are accommodated in Parliamentary Affairs. research centres. I do not knew what !>

!J .52 53 research the corrupt official will do Singh Deo, Minister of except research in corruption perhaps. II State in the Ministry 00 of Food and Civil Supplies cryptically remarked: I, Roses & thorns During the course of Half-an-Hour II.•... In fact, I was a bit worried ",that just only ten days back, we hi!rl:1'a .' discussion on a Starred Question regarding I erection of barbed wire fencing along the Calling Attention here. The same very Indo- Bangladesh Border, the following Members were waxing eloquence against pleasantaries were exchanged bet:veen the the price rise and the same very Deputy Chairman and Shri Jaswant Smgh: members have been again saying. that more remunerative prices should be SHRI JASWANT SINGH: Indeed, I will given. • • •• So, it is running with the hare and hunting with the hound. II attempt to confine myself ... 00

THE DEPUTY CHAIRMAN: within the barbed wire fencing. I am just reminding Seeing directly and speaking indirectly you. Members were putting supplementaries SHRI JASWANT SINGH: From you l-.ladam on a Starred Question regarding manufacture Deputy Chairman, the last thin g I expected of Dexamethasone. Shri Vasant Sathe, really was the barbed response ...•. Minister of Energy was replying on behalf of Shri N. D. Tiwari, Minister of Industry. The THE DEPUTY CHAIRMAN: The roses are Minister's reply to a supplementary from Shri always accompanied by some thorns. Vishvajit Prithvijit Singh was punctuated with several interruptions. The Chairman, SHRI JASWANT SINGH: As long as I have coming to the rescue of the Minister, advised the roses, I will put up with the thorns. him: 00 Running with the hare and IIMr. Minister, you should see me and hunting with the hound speak. You are seeing them directly j that is why you get into trouble. II While replying to the clarifications sought by members on a Calling Attention on the immediate nee-l to pay remunerative prices Shri Sathe, thereupon, quipped: to the sugarcane growers, Shri K. P.

I> III see them and speak through you. II 00

:I 54 _ 55

SeeingtMr. Chairman in every member Shri Shankaranand thereupon observed -- .::' t-o as follows:

MR. CHAIRMAN: Mr. Minister, please 11 address me. If you address him, you will go I am sorry. If another Shanti had been on replying to him. there I would have said: Shanti Shanti Shantill RAG BIRENDRA SINGH: Sir, I see you in 00 every Member. You are pervading the whole House. ' Showing back to the chair [ . l\,m. 'CHAIRMAN: That is the very reason Supplementaries were being put on a why I say that you should see me, and not Starred Question regarding manufacture of others. The subject is very sweet. * Dexamethasone. Interrupting a member who Therefore, every member wants to speak. was putting his supplementary, the Chairman addressing Shri M.C. Bhandare jokingly 00 remarked:

.Shanti Shanti Shanti Mr. Bhandare, You are too handsome, do not show your back •.•.. The. House

" " 57 \ 56 'c. House witnessed the following exchange of SHRI ABDUL GHAFOOR: I am sorry. (a) repartees: . Yes, Madam. I?R. SHYAM SUNDAR MOHAPATRA: I would i' SHRI R. RAMAKRISHNAN: Very often in this lIke. to know from the Minister of Tourism as House many Ministers and other Members ~o m how many cases this Light and Sound I forget that you are adorning the Chair. It In other. words Son Et Lumiere, programme must hereafter be resolved, every time has been Introduced. Question No. (b) ... anybody says 'Sir', it includes 'Madam' like under the General Clauses Act. MR. CHAIRMAN: No. No. 00 DR. SHYAM SUNDAR MOHAPATRA: Sir not Sitting on a spring (b ~, but Whether it has been introduc~d in OrIssa ... The House was discussing the statement made by the Prime Minister, Shri Rajiv ~HRI ,vISWANATH PRATAP SINGH: Sir,' he Gandhi in respect of elections in Punjab. IS makIng only sound but throwing no light. While replying to the point raised by Shri Dipen Ghosh, the Prime Minister quipped: 00

"You seem to be sitting on a spring Superfast question hour because you keep on bouncing up and

down. II On a particular sitting of the House as Thereupon, the following witty many as 10 questions for oral answers were exchange took place: disp07ed of as against an avera.ge of 4-5 questIOns. Three questions went off without SHRI DIPEN GHOSH: I do not take off like any supplementaries being put. Starred him. Question No. 133 was the last question to be put and the question hour ended on the THE DEPUTY CHAIRMAN: He only sometimes following hilarious note with Shri Madhavrao Scind~a (Minister of State in the Department crashlands. 00 of ~aI1ways) being called in to speak by the Sound sans light ChaIrman. remarking:

During interpellations on a Starred II I am afraid. we are going at a Question regarding 'Sound and Light' show superfast speed. II at Sun Shore Temple, Mahabalipuram, the [> [> 58 59 MR. CHAIRMAN: We want the trains to be as SHRI S. W. DHABE: How can there be a time fast as we are going. limit for you? SHRI MADHAVRAO SCINDIA: I wish, at the PROF. C. LAKSHMANNA: We only want a superfast speed I did not end up with an limit' for the prices. 00 accident. 00 Too many "lastly" Taking lessons properly Dr. Shan ti G • Pa tel had spoken at length on the Seventh Five Year Plan. As he As soon as Shri Arun Singh, was about to conclude. he said: Parliamentary Secretary to the Prime lvlinister had completed his maiden answer to a "And lastly, I would like to ask ..• II Starred Question regarding INSAT- IC, the Prior to this when the member tried to following witty exchange followed: conclude he had used the expression "lastly". SHRIMATI MAIMOONA SULTAN: Mr. The Vice-Chairman (Shri M.P. Kaushik) Cha~rman, Sir, I shall be very brief, lest I interrupted him and jokingly remarked: should be stopped by you. IIHow many IIlastlyll you want to have?1I MR. CHAIRMAN: I am glad you are taking 00 lessons properly. 00 Unique Birthday greetings to Chairman Time-limit vs. price-limit The Rajya Sabha felicitated its Chairman, Shri R. Venkataraman, on his After the members had spoken on a 76th Birthday (which fell on 4th December, Short Duration discussion on price rise, the 1985) with a dash of solemnity and humour Vice-Chairman [Dr. (Smt.) 1 and he responded with his own wit. The called the Minister of State for Food and following pleasantries were exchanged during Civil Supplies (Shri K.P. Singh Deo) to the course of the felicitations: reply to the debate. The Ministe:: enq.uired of the Vice-Chairman how much hme dId he SHRI M.S. GURUPADASWAMY: Sir, you are have to reply. 75 today, if I am correct. This led to the following repartee: SHRI HARI SINGH NALWA: He seems to be thirty. SHRI PARVATHANENI UPENDRA: If you can reduce the prices you can have as much time SHRI B. SATYANARAYAN REDDY: He is 75, as you like. but he looks like 35. S.• RI K.P. SINGH DEO: That I cannot guarantee. *** T: E VICE-CHAIRMAN: There is no restriction for you.

, ' 60 61

SHRI R. MOHANARANGAM:Sir, you have SHRI M. KALYANASUNDARAM: Otherwise, reached your 76th Birthday today, having nothing will go on record. already completed 75 years. just a week back I completed 51 years, you have MR. CHAIRMAN: Today everything said will completed 75 years today and I am going to go on record ... see you when you reach 100 years. ,I *** I MR. CHAIRMAN:You can fairly be my son. The Chairman expressed his gratitude *** to all the members and said in all humility:

SHRI PARVATHANENI UPENDRA: Sir, I join "It is g~od to ~emember a person of my the Leader of the House and my other a~e. ~f ~he b~l~hng pate, tottering legs, colleagues in wishing you many happy dlmll1lsh111gVISIonand hearing. " . returns of the day. You have already 00 completed three quarters of a cent,:ry,. ~nd definitely, we are sure that you wIll f1111Sh Visit to a Zoo the century. Shri B. R. Bhagat, Minister of External Affairs was replying to the clarifications *** sought by members on his statement on the SHRI SANKAR PRASAD MITRA: May we wish visit of Prime Minister to Vietnam and Japan. you a long and useful life in the service of In reply to a point raised by member (Shri J~s~ant Singh) regarding visit of the Prime the nation. M1111sterto UENO Zoo in Tokyo, the Minister was trying to explain that the two baby MR. CHAIRMAN:I hope it is a judgement. @ elephants Asha and Daya gifted by India to Japan, were extremely popular amongst *** Japanes~ and they were symbols of hope, MR. CHAIRMAN: I thank you all very much compaSSIOn and friendship between the warmly and sincerely. I think everyone of people of the two nations. Shri J.K, Jain at you would wish that I had a birthday every this stage intervened to remark jokingly: day, because I have been liberal in calling "Our Members have no everybody which I do not do otherwise. t> love and affection for human beings; how can {}This remark was made by the Chairman presum- they have love for animals?" ably due to the fact that Shri Mitra is a t> former Chief Justice of the Calcutta High Court. 62 '63

Professor C. Lakshmanna retorted: the statement made by Shri B .R. Bhagat, Minister of External Affairs on Prime IIWe know you have so much love for Minister's visit to Vietnam and Japan. The animals instead of human beings. II Deputy Chairman [Dr. (Smt.) Najma Heptulla] called Shri Jaswant Singh to seek Shri B .R. Bhagat went on to elaborate clarifications. This led to the following witty further that the Prime Minister's visit to the exchange: Zoo was shown on their TV network and was watched by millions of people and the impact SHRI JASWANT SINGH: Madam Deputy the visit had on relationship between the Chairman, would you stop me from saying Japanese and had to be seen whatever I wish to say? to be believed. The Deputy Chairman [Dr, (Smt.) Najma Heptulla] interrupted the THE DEPUTY CHAIRMAN: No, I am not Minister by saying: stopping.

IIMr. Jaswant Singh should be included SHRI JASWANT SINGH: You are in the visit to a zoo! II interrupting.

This led to the following exchange of THE DEPUTY CHAIRMAN: That I have to. repartees: SHRI JASWANT SINGH: Would you permit me SHRI JASWANT SINGH: I would only be to continue uninterrupt~d or permit me to delighted to visit an international zoo. So far finish? as visiting a zoo is concerned this is your suggestion and the suggestion is coming from THE DEPUTY CHAIRMAN: After you finish. the Chair. I would only be delighted. I will interrupt?1I 00 THE DEPUTY CHAIRMAN: I am a zoologist Weighty question and so, I said. While Shri Vishwajit Prithvijit Singh SHRI JASWANT SINGH: Anyhow, Madam, * stood up to put his supplementary on visits to the zoo by the Starred Question regarding installation of is particularly appropriate. 00 C>

Unique interruption * Shri Singh is a member with a heavy built. Members were seeking clarifications on C> 64 65

'Quinghao' antimalarial plant in India, the SHRI V. GOPALSAMY: Yes, definitely, if I Chairman after calling him, remarked as am provided with weapons by the Minister. follows: 00 II He is putting a weighty question. II Wordy duel 00 Sarvashri V. Gopalsamy, M. Willing to go to Sri Lanka Kalyanasundaram and R. Mohanarangam made if provided with weapons special mentions regarding police firing on agitating fishermen in Madras. During the During the course of a short duration mention the House witnessed' repeated discussion on racial riots in South acrimonious and heated exchanges between affecting the people of Indian Origin when Shri Gopalsamy and Shri Mohanarangam. Shri V. Gopalsamy was called to speak by Immediately after . Shri Mohanarangam the Vice-Chairman (Shri R. Ramakrishnan), completed his submission Shri Gopalsamy commented: the following hilarious exchange took place: IIHe is justifying the killing. II THE VICE-CHAIRMAN (SHRI R. RAMAKRISHNAN): Last but not the least, Shri Gopalsamy. Shri Mohanarangam retorted as follows:

SHRI KHURSHID ALAMKHAN: Firebrand Mr. IIMadam, I was not justifying the Gopalsamy! killing. He is instigating the killings. II

SHRI V. GOPALSAMY: Mr. Vice-Chairman, The Deputy Chairman [Dr. (Smt.) Najma Sir, are you willing to deport me to South Heptulla] then cryptically remarked: Africa? III can well understand how terrible it SHRI S. W. DHABE: Then you can fight must have been, looking at the small sample here. II better! 00

THE MINISTER OF STATE IN THE MINISTRY Wordy pollution OF PARLIAMENTARY AFFAIRS (SHRIMATI MARGARET ALVA): You will be the right During Question Hour Shri S. W. Dhabe person to fight. had put a supplementary to the Minister of I State in the Ministry of Environment and THE VICE-CHAIRMAN: He would prefer to Forests (Shri Z. R.' Ansari) regarding C> go to Sri Lanka. C>

Ji I II III

66

pollution caused by thermal power. plants located in urban areas. Not satisfied with the reply of the Minister, the member stuck to his stand. This led. to quick exchanges between the member, the Chairman and the Minister. Thereupon the member put a further supplemeri tary to the Minister:

"What is acid rain? The hon. Minister .1 should enlighten the House about this I also. II

The Chairman then commented:

"Both of you are talking at the same time and you do not understand each

other. II

At that point another member. Shri Jaswant Singh expressed his desire to ask a supplementary. This led to the following witty ..exchange:

MR. CHAIRMAN: Let us first dissolve this.

SHRI JASWANT SINGH: It would not be dissolved .

.MR. CHAIRMAN: This pollution has to be dissolved.

The Minister thereafter made some clarificatory observations which promoted the Chairman to advise Shri Jaswant Singh as under: HLet us not pollute the atmosphere further, Mr. Jaswant Singh. II 00

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