Preparation

Saint Angela Merici Church 20970 Lorain Rd Fairview Park, Ohio 44126 440-333-2133

Wedding Planner #25 Please Return to Parish Center Office

Table of Contents

The Sacrament of Marriage Page 1

Initial Considerations Page 2 Necessary Church Documents

Impediments and Dispensations Page 3 Necessary Civil Documents

Scheduling the Time and Date Page 4 The

Rites for Celebrating Marriage Page 5

Visiting Priest Page 6 Member of the Parish Banns

Wedding Rehearsal Page 7 Of Other Things Pictures and Videos

Servers Page 8 Wedding Booklets Flowers Aisle Runner Wedding Candles

Deliveries to the Church Page 9 Guidelines for Planning Wedding Music

Odds & Ends Page 10 Prayer

Fees Page 11

Programs Page 12-13

Congratulations as you prepare for the Sacrament of Marriage

The following information is offered to help you plan for your wedding. It contains the guidelines of the Roman and the regulations of the Diocese of Cleveland. It also addresses the legal requirements of the State of Ohio.

The Sacrament of Marriage In the beginning God said, “It is not good that the man should live alone; I will make him a helpmate.” (Gen. 2:18)

The sacrament of marriage is a call from Christ inviting a man and a woman to be joined to one another and to God in a special relationship. It is an act of trust in God which affirms that through joy and pain, success and failure, the spontaneous attraction of man to woman and woman to man is transformed into true charity, into a charity which takes on the value of eternity. The sacrament shows how marital love, as strong as death, cannot be extinguished because it comes from God.

Understood in this way, the sacrament of marriage becomes an extension of all the other sacra- ments of Catholic life: it calls for a practical response to our baptismal vocation in a particularly important life choice; it is a call to put into a physical, emotional and spiritual form the commun- ion with God and with neighbor which is brought about mysteriously in the fullness of the Eucha- rist. It feeds on the gift of the Spirit and lays claim to wisdom and grace. There is even a need to stress its relationship to the sacrament of penance, to the degree that the family, the place not only of encounter, but also of confrontation, conflict and failure, is at the same time that of reconcilia- tion and forgiveness to which a specific sacrament of the church invites us. So the sacrament of marriage stands at the crossroads of Catholic life in its totality.

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Initial Considerations

The Diocese of Cleveland requires a period of at least six months in which to prepare for your marriage. This is to allow ample time for you and the priest, deacon or pastoral minister to meet and together assess your practical and spiritual readiness to receive the sacrament of matrimony.

To assist in this evaluation you will be asked to answer some questions and share your thoughts about such topics as: the sanctity of marriage, mutual obligations of husband and wife, and duties of parents toward children. Specifically, you will take part in the Cleveland Diocese Evaluation for Marriage or FOCCUS. This is used to evaluate areas of religion and life, marriage readiness, children and parenthood, sexuality and conjugal morality, extended family and in-laws, interests and activities, and issues dealing with finances. FOCCUS takes about an hour to complete and will be scheduled as a separate appointment. Upon completion, FOCCUS is sent to the diocese for evaluation. There is a $15.00 fee for this (please refer to page 13).

When the evaluation is returned, you will have the opportunity to talk about the results and to ask any questions or discuss any concerns you may have with the priest, deacon ,or pastoral minister. Please note that the information contained in FOCCUS is strictly confidential and is destroyed after your wedding.

Because of the seriousness of the marital commitment, it is required that you, as a couple, attend one of the programs listed under ‘Programs’ on page 12 as another opportunity to grow closer to each other and strengthen your faith.

Other Considerations– Necessary Church Documents

If you have been previously married, you must submit either a Declaration of Nullity in the case of divorce or a Death Certificate if your former spouse is deceased. It is very important that you inform the priest or deacon of any marital bond that may have previously existed before you begin the present preparation process —no wedding date may be set if former marriage ques- tions need to be resolved.

You will also need baptismal information. If you are a Roman Catholic an original baptismal certificate can be obtained from the parish where you were baptized. This certificate must be dated within the six month period of your marriage preparation.

If you are a Christian of another denomination, you must provide proof of your in that church. You may obtain an original or copy of the baptismal certificate or you may provide a letter from the church of your baptism.

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You will also be asked to provide a certificate of attendance from any of the pre-marriage programs listed on page 12.

Impediments and Dispensations

Because the spiritual welfare of the faithful is of utmost importance to the Church, some assurance must be given that, as a couple, every opportunity will be taken advantage of to promote and practice the teaching of the Catholic Church regarding married life and children. When a Catholic marries a person not of the Catholic faith, the Catholic party will be asked to sign a pre-nuptial promise stating that these areas of married life have been discussed and are understood by both parties. This agreement or dispensation will then be forwarded to the bishop of the diocese for approval. There is a $5.00 fee for this (please refer to page 11).

As a further safeguard to the sanctity of your marriage you, again as a couple, will be asked to sign the following statement as your witness to the desire and freedom to marry :

“We, in the presence of one another, individually declare our freedom to marry and our freedom from any known impediments between us. We hold marriage to be a life-long and faithful union and process of choosing each other for the mutual sharing of our life and our love; it is a union which is open to children; it is a union which is modeled after and symbolizes God’s ever faithful love for God’s people. It is this partnership of life and love that we seek in marriage and to which we publicly give our consent.”

The priest, deacon, or pastoral minister will go over this statement with you during one of your meetings to make certain that there are no doubts or reservations concerning the forthcoming marriage.

Necessary Civil Documents

Before the marriage can take place, a civil must be obtained from:

Probate Court of Cuyahoga County, Marriage License Department Old Court House, 101 Lakeside Avenue, Cleveland, Ohio, 44113 Room 146 Phone: 216-443-8920 or 216-443-8947 Open: 8:30 a.m. - 4:30 p.m. Monday - Friday Closed: Saturdays, Sundays & Legal Holidays website: www.cuyahogacounty.us/probate

In the State of Ohio, the application for a marriage license may be made in the county of either applicant. If neither party is a resident of Ohio, the applications are to be made in the county in which the ceremony is to be performed (St Angela is in Cuyahoga County). Please check the Cuyahoga County Probate website as cited above for the necessary documents and current fees needed to file for a marriage license.

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Parties are required to apply for the marriage license together, unless one, or both, are physi- cally unable to do so. If this is the case, then their physician is required to sign an affidavit stating the reason for the disability. Upon completion of the affidavit, it will be signed, acknowledged, and filed with the application for the marriage license.

According to Ohio law, the license will not be issued within five (5) days of the application. However, for good cause, the Probate Judge may waive such a period if time, based on the reasons set forth in the application requesting such waiver of time.

The license may be picked up by either of the parties upon expiration of the waiting period. Please note that the application for a marriage license is valid for thirty (30) days from the date of applying and the license is valid for sixty (60) days after it is issued.

Please remember to bring the marriage license with you to the wedding rehearsal.

Scheduling the Time and Date

When you first call the parish to schedule the date and time for your wedding, that date and time will be tentative until completion of obtaining all necessary information and fulfilling all preparation requirements for marriage. The priest, deacon, or pastoral minister you are working with can help you determine this. The usual times for at St. Angela are: 5:00 p.m. Friday; 11:30 a.m. Saturday; 2:00 p.m. Saturday

No weddings are scheduled on Sundays, Holy Days, National Holidays or usually during Lent. No weddings may be celebrated outside the church building. This is in keeping with Church and diocesan guidelines.

The Wedding

The Roman Catholic Rite of Marriage is so rich in symbolism and grace that every effort should be made to use all of what is available according to one of three rites you are celebrating. Each rite is meant to impart the grace of the sacrament and to convey a solemn knowledge of the obligation of the married couple in addition to stressing the importance and dignity of the Sacrament of Marriage. The outlines of the three Rites are as follows:

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Rite For Celebrating Marriage During Mass Entrance Rite Liturgy of the Word Rite of Marriage  Introduction  Questions  Consent  Blessing of Rings  Exchange of Rings  General Intercessions Liturgy of the  Preparation of the Altar and Gifts  Lord’s Prayer  Nuptial Blessing  Sign of Peace  Communion  Prayer After Communion  Concluding Rite  Solemn Blessing  Dismissal

Rite For Celebrating Marriage Outside Mass Entrance Rite Liturgy of the Word Rite of Marriage  Introduction  Questions  Consent  Blessing of Rings  Exchange of Rings  General Intercessions  Nuptial Blessing Conclusion of the Celebration  Lord’s Prayer and Blessing

Rite For Celebrating Marriage Between a Catholic and an Unbaptized Person Rite of Welcome Blessing of Rings Liturgy of the Word Exchange of Rings Homily General Intercessions Rite of Marriage Nuptial Blessing Introduction Conclusion of the Celebration Questions Lord’s Prayer and Blessing Consent

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The parish provides a booklet ( Together for Life) to help you choose readings, blessings and prayers that will make your wedding personal, yet, reflect the Gospel values to be lived out in your life together as a couple.

The priest, deacon, or pastoral minister who is helping you with your marriage preparation can help you with this as well as answer any questions you may have about your choices. A meeting should be made at least two (2) weeks before the wedding to go over plans for the ceremony.

Visiting Priest

If any priest other than one from St. Angela is to be the celebrant at your wedding, please determine if he is to be responsible for all paperwork, instructions, and the rehearsal. If not, you may work with a priest from St. Angela to complete the required preparations. If you work exclusively with a visiting priest, inform him of the wedding policies here at St. Angela and have him contact one of our priests to work out any details. Any priest or deacon from out-of–State needs an Ohio Minister’s License and permission from the pastor of St. Angela to witness your wedding vows. Concelebrants are also welcome and need only to inform the main celebrant of his attendance.

Member of the Parish

At least one party of the couple should be a registered member of St. Angela Church for the wedding to take place here. If this is not the case, permission from the pastor of the parish that you are registered in is needed. This permission should be in written form and included in your marriage papers. Being away at school or being in a temporary job out of town does not change your status as a member of the parish.

Banns

Banns (i.e., announcement of the wedding) are customarily published in the bulletin of the parish where the wedding is to take place three weekends before the ceremony.

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Wedding Rehearsal

As the day of the wedding approaches, the task of last minute details can be very stressful— but the wedding rehearsal does not need to be one of those occasions. The sooner you are able to schedule the rehearsal the better the chance of securing the evening and time that you want. In addition to scheduling your rehearsal early, here are some other tips that can help:  be prompt— there may be more than one rehearsal scheduled for the same evening  bring the marriage license and all fees with you if you haven’t done so already  if there are any last minute changes, please let the priest or deacon know  if a visiting celebrant is conducting the rehearsal, please schedule the date and time on the church calendar by informing the parish secretary or one of the priests  if you are going to have the lighting of wedding candles, please bring them

Of Other Things

The size and make-up of your bridal party is up to you. Persons of other faith traditions may be in the party and may serve as Maid of Honor or Best Man

A priest will not be available to celebrate the Sacrament of Reconciliation with you on the evening of the rehearsal. However, you, members of the wedding party, and parents are in- vited to receive the sacrament at any of our regular scheduled times of confession. It is very important that any Catholic in the party be able to receive Eucharist at the celebration of your marriage.

Keeping in mind that the church is sacred and holy and the place where we come to meet God in worship and prayer, the following standards of conduct are presumed:  modesty of at the rehearsal and wedding  no loud talking or laughing  no smoking or chewing gum  proper language  mature and proper conduct as fits the occasion

Pictures and Videos

Your wedding day is one of the most significant days in your life and a pictorial recording of the day is very important. Therefore, it is suggested that you choose a qualified and reliable photographer that not only can deliver quality pictures, but one that can maintain the dignity of the church and ceremony. Please advise the photographer, whether professional or amateur, to confer with the celebrant immediately before the ceremony. Suggestion: since the wedding cannot be interrupted for pictures or videotaping, the photographer should try to stay at one location — we have found that the side, in front of Mary’s altar is a good place.

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Servers

St. Angela will provide two (2) servers for the wedding unless informed otherwise. If you are having family members or friends act as servers, please let the priest or deacon that is helping with your marriage preparation know early enough so that servers from St. Angela are not assigned. Also, please make sure that any server you choose is familiar with serving at weddings. See page 11 if we are supplying servers.

Wedding Booklets

If you are planning to have wedding booklets printed, it is a good idea to consult with the celebrant before you send a final copy to the printers. This will insure that nothing has been omitted and that the ceremony is in correct order.

Flowers

Flowers are a beautiful addition to any occasion, but especially for a wedding, so your floral arrangements are certainly welcome. In the event that there are two weddings on the same day, the cost of flowers is sometimes split between the two parties. Please contact the parish secretary if you would like information about doing this. After the wedding, some of the flowers are often transferred to the reception to be enjoyed, but more often, the flowers are left in church for the weekend masses.

Aisle Runner

If you are using an aisle runner, the length of the main aisle is 125 feet. If your florist is not able to remove the runner immediately after the wedding, please have your ushers do so.

Wedding Candles

Many couples find meaning in lighting Unity Candles at their ceremony. If you wish to do so you can purchase the candles at most religious goods stores or possibly from your florist. The candles should be brought with you to the rehearsal and someone from your wedding party should be assigned to remove the candles as a keepsake after the wedding. St. Angela does have a holder for a standard sized wedding candle and two smaller dinner sized candles that you may use.

Fairview Park has a fire ordinance prohibiting the use of candles anywhere except in the sanctuary

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Deliveries

We ask that any delivery of flowers, runners, decorations, etc. not be made more than one (1) hour prior to the beginning of the ceremony. Please be sure to make arrangements to have all boxes, wrappings, and other items cleaned up and removed immediately after the wedding.

Guidelines for Planning Wedding Music Provided by Saint Angela

Music for wedding ceremonies held at St. Angela Parish and provided by St. Angela must be planned with the Parish Music Director generally 6-8 weeks before the ceremony.

Planning meetings generally last 45 minutes.

If it is possible to meet with the Music Director at the church after a weekend liturgy, please call the Parish Center at 440-333-2133, and leave your: name, the date and time of your wed- ding, your phone number, and a convenient time that you can be reached. Calls will be re- turned by the Music Director as soon as possible.

Before the meeting make some decisions as to whether or not you would like a vocalist, or an instrumentalist, whether you are lighting a wedding candle, or going to Mary’s altar. We also need to know how many there will be.

The music for your wedding should reflect the sacramental nature of the Catholic wedding ceremony, and should be identifiable as prayer. In general, popular selections do not fulfill these criteria, and are, therefore, inappropriate for the ceremony. However, there are a multi- plicity of ways to make your wedding quite unique musically as well as prayerfully.

The use of soloists will enhance the wedding ceremony, and many fine musicians are avail- able through the church, as well as orchestral musicians in greater Cleveland. Your options not only include your vocalist, but a vast array of instrumentalists. Perhaps you may decide to engage strings, flute, oboe, or trumpet. The Music Director is able to make connections for you should any of these instruments appeal to you. A list of musical selections that are appro- priate for the Catholic wedding ceremony is on file with the Music Director. You will have the opportunity to review the selections at your consultation meeting.

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Odds & Ends

For the safety of guests and in consideration of church property and others who use our facilities, we ask that you do not throw confetti, rice, birdseed, or any other like materials. These products are difficult to clean up and present the chance of injury to the eyes and enhance the danger of slipping. However, bubbles may be used. We also ask that you make sure that all items such as boxes, cartons, papers, booklets, etc. are not left behind.

And Finally …

As people of faith we understand that marriage is a spiritual covenant not only between two people, but also between God and the couple and between the couple and the community. The sacrament of marriage becomes a grace-filled way to God, an opportunity to provide a needed symbol in the contemporary world, a veritable sacrament, of the steadfastly loving union between God and God’s people and between Christ and Christ’s church.

And so we pray…

May God bless you and grant you joy. May he deepen your love for each other. May he bless you in your family and friends, And lead you to unending happiness in heaven. May he keep you in his love for ever and ever.

Amen.

God Bless You!

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Fees

Initial Deposit It has come to our attention that more and more wedding couples have selected a date and time for a wedding at our church and then, for whatever reason, have decided not to get married but do not apprise us of this and leave their names on the books. Our staff must spend hours trying to contact these couples, sometimes to no avail. In the meantime, we are holding that specific date and time and are not able to offer that day to other couples. Therefore, to serve the needs of all our parishioners, we are establishing a policy similar to many churches in the country of asking for a deposit from wedding couples at the time they book their wedding. The thoughtless- ness of a few has forced us to levy such a fee. At Saint Angela, we are asking a deposit of $100.00 when you select your wedding date. This nonrefundable fee will be credited to you and serve as the church fee listed below. We hope that this will not inconvenience anyone but will serve to honor the requests in a just and fair manner.

 For the church For parishioners registered over one year: $100 made payable to Saint Angela Merici Church. For non-parishioners and those newly registered: $300.

 For the celebrant $200 made payable to the celebrant. If there is a concelebrant, arrangements should be made directly with him.

 For the organist $200.00 made payable to the organist to cover ceremony and all prior meetings/consultations. Please consult with the organist regarding any soloist or additional instrumentalists. Please note: The Saint Angela Music Director/organist is required to be present at all weddings to oversee the use of the organ, sound system, lighting, and bell sys- tem. The director must also be available to assist vocalists and other musicians if necessary. There- fore, the fee for the Saint Angela organist still applies even if another organist/musician is desired by the Bridal Couple. This will ensure the smooth running of the liturgy for your special day.

 For each altar server $10.00 cash (in separate envelopes, please)

 For FOCCUS or other $20.00 marriage readiness evaluation instrument

For any dispensation $5.00 necessary

Reminder For convenience, fees must be paid at the time of the wedding rehearsal.

If any of these fees present a problem, please speak with the priest or deacon who is witnessing your marriage.

Preparation Programs (Please choose one)

One-Day Pre-Cana

This program gives couples the opportunity to discuss and learn about topics critical to a happy and holy marriage. By sharing about aspects of their own marriage, married couples serve as catalysts for engaged couples to do the same. The priest, deacon, or pastoral minister helping you with your wedding arrangements will have the schedule of locations and dates of pre-Cana sessions in the area, St. Angela Merici included.

Diocesan Pre-Marriage Conferences

This diocesan program is a group instruction covering major areas of marital and family life experiences along with Catholic teaching on issues of Christian morality and family life. These Conferences are scheduled at various parishes throughout the diocese, usually in March and in September. They begin at 2 p.m. and conclude at 4:30 p.m.—the cost is $20.00 per couple for the series. For more information call: 1-216-696-6525, ext. 3570.

Engaged Encounter

This program is a unique marriage preparation weekend. Married couples along with a priest or married deacon, share their personal experiences as a catalyst for the engaged to examine their own relationship. After each presentation questions are provided for each individual to answer privately. Then the couple intimately shares and discusses their answers to the ques- tions with each other. This enables each couple to develop and understand their own unique, loving relationship.

The presentations cover a wide variety of topics including communications, decision-making, disillusionment, and forgiveness. The shared life experiences of the married couples provide a realistic and practical view of marriage from couples who actively seek to keep their love alive and growing. More that that, the Team presenters provide the engaged a model for living out the vow they will also be making before God.

The weekend gives an engaged couple time to explore the current and future issues in their relationship. It is a time to look beyond the wedding and to the life they will live after they walk down the aisle. This also gives each couple the opportunity to consider the spiritual as- pect of their relationship that can be as much a part of their marriage as the emotional, physi- cal, and mental dimensions. For more information call: 572-8915.

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Cana II

This program is specifically designed for those who have been previously married and are free to marry again in the Church. The emphasis is on issues and problems that typically occur in second . The program is presented with the help of other couples who are in second marriages themselves. For more information call: 1-216-696-6525, ext. 3570.

Couples Ministry

The Diocese has trained couples available to meet with you, in their home on a couple-to- couple basis, for 4 or 5 sessions. The priest, deacon, or pastoral minister will arrange this for you, if you choose this option.

An Additional Program Recommended for Your Enrichment: Natural Family Planning

Natural family planning refers to any of several means using the woman’s natural cycle to avoid fertile periods, thus allowing the couple to engage in sexual intercourse with a lowered risk of becoming pregnant.

The Roman Catholic Church approves of using these methods because they do not interfere with the sexual act and because they allow the couple to remain open to the possibil- ity of having children. The Church also emphasizes the fact that the periodic abstinence from sexual activity serves as a way for couples to find other ways to express their love and commitment to each other.

If you, as a couple, are interested, there is a seminar on Natural Family Planning which is taught over a four month period meeting once a month for four consecutive months. Many couples take this course in advance of their wedding.

For more detailed information you may call Tim and Mary Ellen Jakubison at 440-779-5993. Tim and Mary Ellen are St. Angela parishioners who also serve as instructors for the Natural Family Planning seminars.

For information on alternative programs call: 1-216-696-6525, ext. 3570. You may also visit the diocesan website at: www.dioceseofcleveland.org

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When finished with this binder, please return it to the Parish Center Office.

Thank You!

Check List

Wedding Ceremony Check List

Number in Wedding Party ______

Order of Procession

Flower Girl ______

Ring Bearer ______

Escort of ______

Escort of Bride’s Mother ______

Escort of Groom’s Mother ______

Schedule of Meetings for Marriage Preparation

Person Place Day Date Time

______

______

______

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______

______

______

______

______

______

______

______

______

______

______

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Don’t Forget to Register!

As a couple, will you be residing in Saint Angela Merici Parish? If so, please fill out the enclosed Registration Form and bring it to the Parish Center (20979 Lorain Rd.)

Likewise, if you will be living in another parish, please acquire the proper form from that parish and register there as soon as possible. The accuracy of sacramental records and services available depend on correct and current registration information.

Where to Start

First Meeting: with: ______date: ______

Second Meeting: date: ______Third Meeting: date:______

Do you need Declaration of Nullity? yes  no Death Certificate ? yes  no 

Baptismal Information and certificates for  bride  groom

Certificate of Attendance from Pre-marriage Program  Name of program______

Do you need any dispensations? yes  no 

Sign Freedom to Marry Statement? yes  no  Date signed ______

Marriage License 

Do you need permission from the pastor of your home parish to marry at St. Angela? yes  no 

If yes, date obtained: ______

Schedule Wedding: date: ______time: ______

Obtain Together for Life Booklet  Completion of Selections form 

Will there be a visiting priest? yes  no 

If yes, does he have all pertinent information? yes  no 

Arrangements for rehearsal : date:______time: ______

Plan for Confession-- for yourselves: yes  no  for wedding party: yes  no 

All music plans complete yes  no 

Photographer made aware to meet with priest before ceremony yes  no 

Wedding Booklet previewed by celebrant yes  no 

Will you be members of St. Angela after you are married? yes  no 

Do you need to register? yes  no 

For the Rehearsal

Decisions! Decisions! Decisions!

Who is in the wedding party and how will they be paired?

Maid/Matron of Honor ______Best Man______

Bride’s Maids: Groomsmen

______

______

______

______

______

______

______

______

Flower Girl: ______Ring-bearer: ______

Who will escort the Bride? ______Who will escort the Mother of the Bride? ______Who will escort the Mother of Groom? ______Any other escorts? ______Who are the Ushers? ______Where will the Groomsmen meet the Bridesmaids? entrance  cross-aisle  front  Will wedding party enter pew from center aisle  or side aisle  Where will the bride dress? home  at church  Will there be pew decorations? yes  no  Who will place the aisle runner? ______Will there be a Unity Candle? yes  no  What will you do at the Sign of Peace? stay in sanctuary go to parents  will you give flowers to mothers? yes  no go to wedding party  Will you go to Mary’s altar?yes  no  Will there be a receiving line at church? yes  no  Who will clean-up? (aisle runner, flowers, etc) ______

Partcipants at the Wedding Liturgy:

Own servers? yes  no ______First Reading: ______Psalm: ______Second Reading: ______General Intercessions: ______Presentation of Gifts: ______Extraordinary Ministers yes  no ______Communion under both kinds (both Body and Blood) yes  no  Please have someone responsible for small children in the wedding party. * it would be a good idea if the readers rehearsed their readings beforehand

Please Remember to Bring:

Marriage License 

Payment for outstanding fees church  celebrant  organist  servers 

Unity Candle 

------NOTES

When finished with this binder, please return it to the Parish Center Office.

Thank You!

Wedding Planner Log

Planner # Name Phone Date Borrowed Date Returned

______NOTES

May the God of hope fill you with every joy in believing. May the peace of Christ abound in your hearts. May the enrich you with gifts, now and for ever.

Congratulations on your upcoming Wedding