WILLY WEEK SPECIAL See P

VOLUME 100, ISSUE NO. 22 | STUDENT-RUN SINCE 1916 | RICETHRESHER.ORG | WEDNESDAY, MARCH 16, 2016 WILLY WEEK SPECIAL See p. 3-8 Tuition costs continue to increase Andrew Ligeralde even while adding enhancements 2016-17 Tuition Assistant News Editor to our educational programs,” Leebron said. $50,000 $43,220 The annual increase of Rice Since as far back as 1998 when +$1,660 from last year University’s undergraduate tuition tuition cost $16,450, Rice’s tuition has come to be expected every year, has increased every year at varying and the price tag to attend Rice in rates. The largest change was the $40,000 fall 2016 is no exception. 2006 increase to $28,705, a 13.5 2006-07 Tuition Rice has announced that its percent increase from the previous undergraduate tuition for the 2016- year. Since 2014, the rate of tuition $28,705* +13.5% from previous year 17 school year will be $43,220, a increase has steadied, hovering Largest increase in history $1,660 increase from the current around 4.2 percent per year in $30,000 year. The total cost of $57,668, both 2014 and 2015. This year, the which includes $13,750 for room percent increase is slightly lower at and board and $698 in mandatory 4.0 percent. 2000-01 Tuition fees, represents a 3.2 percent Vice President for Enrollment increase from 2015. Chris Muñoz said a student’s $20,000 $17,720* According to President David investment in Rice is matched by *Tuition rates before 2009-10 varied annually Leebron, the administration has the quality of life afforded by a Rice upon matriculation year. The average is worked to keep tuition hikes as education. He cited the university’s calculated annually of the four classes. low as possible, given donor 2016 Princeton Review rankings, $10,000 support and contributions to Rice’s which included No. 1 for racial endowment. interaction. “Our undergraduate students “Students who invest in a Rice 2000 2002 2004 2006 2008 2010 2012 2014 2016 contribute through their tuition education get to study at a university and fees payments on average that is highly ranked for quality of which represent a total increase has reported its 2016 tuition rate to than Rice’s 2016 tuition, will also about 30 percent of the total cost life, happiest students and lots of of 144 percent since 2000, Rice’s be $51,510. In 2015, Northwestern likely increase for 2016. All three of their education, but we have race and class interaction by the tuition remains lower than those of University’s tuition was $48,624. institutions have consistently worked very hard to keep increases Princeton Review,” Muñoz said. peer institutions, according to the Vanderbilt University’s 2015 tuition shown yearly increases in tuition in their share as small as possible Even with the tuition hikes, mostrecentreports.DukeUniversity of $42,768, though slightly lower since 2000.

New EVP election Paypal co-founder critiques to fill vacancy pitches, talks entrepreneurship

Drew Keller “Justin will be sincerely missed Anita Alem Duncan College junior Philip Taff et a level of information that’s valuable to News Editor on the executive team, but I ap- News Editor presented his venture, a communica- the industry, but there’s all sorts of oth- preciate how transparent he has tions software for the automobile com- er related information around that,” A special election will be held been through this diffi cult process,” PayPal co-founder and Affi rm CEO munications industry. Will Rice Col- Jun said. “I hope that we were able to for Student Association external Thomas said. “His commitment to Max Levchin visited Rice to discuss lege sophomore Jake Nyquist, Lovett encourage them to look at some of the vice president by the end of serve the SA and his peers remains entrepreneurship as a part of his Uni- College junior Brett Gutstein and an broader things there.” the month, pending SA Senate unwavering, and I look forward to versity Tech Tour in an event organized automobile journalist who is not a Rice Although Scott said he was unwill- approval, due to elected candidate continuing to work with him in the jointly with the computer science club. student are also members of the team. ing to pick favorites, Jun said he felt the Justin Onwenu’s decision to step future. I respect his decision and Levchin, a serial entrepreneur, said Taff et said the team, which they baseball pitching device was an excel- down before changeover for hope others will respect his privacy.” one of the main reasons he was drawn named Steward Technology, hopes to lent product in terms of not requiring personal reasons. to Rice was its diversity. see their startup out to the fullest. major education to create a need and According to Director of “We’re looking for far-flung places “We’re in a very niche market,”he for taking advantage of Bluetooth tech- Elections Sai Chilakapati, Senate to find talent,” Levchin said. “One of said. “We know we won’t be the next nology on smartphones. will vote on the the timeline for the things that I care about is gender Facebook. Max is a famous entrepre- “The hardest part about a new tech- a special election on March 14, diversity, and Silicon Valley is not ex- neur; we [hope] to get feedback on our nology is it’s easy to convince yourself then finalize the ballot a week I hope to con- actly a haven of women in computer idea and keep our momentum going.” that the technology is useful and valu- later, after which campaigning science.” Their team has previously won Owl able,” Jun said. “But it’s often hard will begin. Chilakapati, a Hanszen tinue to serve as He cited the relatively high percent- Open, a startup competition with the to do it in a way that’s demonstrably College junior, said the goal is to age of women studying computer sci- Jones Business School. better than the existing product, and have the election completed by a voice for stu- ence at Rice as an impressive achieve- Jones School student Alexander it’s very interesting when you look at March 30. dent concerns in ment for a top-tier program, and said Wesley and his team created the Spon- [products] that can do that.” This process follows the he may be interested in hiring them for taneous Pop-Up Display, or SPUD. It Jun and Scott said they encouraged procedure prescribed by the SA other capacities. any of his projects or companies. is a 24-inch portable computer screen students to recognize the value of sim- constitution, which states that Although Levchin was scheduled to that can be connected to a phone or ply building. a special election to replace a attend a student pitch competition pri- laptop. Duncan junior George Zhu is “The one thing I would impart on position must take place two weeks Justin Onwenu or to his talk, flight delays caused him also a member of the team. Wesley any organization that’s trying to en- after the Senate meeting following to miss the presentations, which were said he felt Levchin’s visit and the pitch courage entrepreneurship and leader- a resignation. Former EVP-Elect recorded for later viewing. competition presented a good opportu- ship is to not underestimate the power Onwenu, a Sid Richardson “I’m hoping to be blown away by a nity to learn. of a builder’s ethos,” Scott said. “There College sophomore, won the EVP few pitches,” Levchin said. “These guys have a lot of years of is true value in just making some- vote in the February general elec- Several representatives of Levchin’s experience in the startup world,” Wes- thing–and that value is evident every- tion with 54 percent of the vote. company Hard, Valuable, Fun, also ley said. “It’s incumbent upon you as where. The most impressive pitches we In his statement, he said that Brianna Singh, one of two can- known as HVF, were in attendance, an entrepreneur to try to learn more saw today were the ones who had built stepping down before Beer Bike, didates who ran against Onwenu including Chief Technology Offi cer every day.” the most.” when changeover officially occurs, for EVP in February, said she is not Benjamin Jun and Head of Investments SPUD is planning to begin their pre- would aid SA President Griffin planning on running in the special Eric Scott. HVF provides seed invest- sale campaign soon and may ship units Thomas and the rest of the execu- election. Hannah Todd, the other ments for emerging projects centered as early as February 2017. tive team in pursuing their agenda. candidate, said she is still decid- on data and is responsible for produc- Ziel Solutions, the team with Sid “Given recent personal circum- ing. The special election will also ing companies such as Yelp, Slide and Richardson College junior Alex Dzeda stances, I believe [not assuming be open to any other undergradu- financial tech company Affi rm. Jun and and Will Rice senior Senthil Natarajan, the EVP role] is the best decision ate, except those disqualified due Scott were in the pitch room critiquing presented their device for reducing the for myself and for the SA,” Onwenu to conflict of interest or probation. teams as they presented their ideas. risk of injury from repetitive physical said in his statement. “Although I Thomas said he will not sup- “Some of these students walked in activity, especially for baseball pitch- am sad to leave this journey pre- port a specific candidate in the with companies that they are going to ing injuries. maturely, I hope to continue to special election. execute and for those ones I hope they Jun said he and Scott can bring in serve as a voice for student con- “I do not plan to make an en- take the plunge and take them as far another pair of eyes, and spoke spe- cerns in other capacities.” dorsement,” Thomas said. “I am as those ideas go,” Scott said. “There’s cifically about Taff et, Nyquist and Gus- Thomas, a Lovett College junior, confident whoever is elected will others that just came to talk about tein’s proposal for the automobile com- also said Onwenu will continue to do a fantastic job and I look for- some cool ideas [and] for those, hope- munications industry. serve the student body. ward to working with him or her.” fully they’ll take it to the next level.” “They figured out how to measure Max Levchin 2 Rice must review academic support systems As seniors who have been both Peer Academic disparity and seek feedback. The head PAAs and the colleges. Maybe anonymous feedback should An easy switch for a Advisors and Academic Fellows, we have HeadFellowsapparentlyassumetheycanfairlyand be collected. Maybe we should eliminate the developedcriticalopinionsoftheseprograms.Both accurately represent us to the Offi ce of Academic largely unneeded Head Fellow position, or instead better Beer Bike are highly regarded at Rice, and we would like to AdvisingandcollegeA-Team,butthisisnotthecase, bolster the responsibilities of the heads and view preface this op-ed by expressing our gratitude and which is clearly evidenced by the lack of PAA events their positions more like those of coordinators. Beer Bike is one of the most anticipated admirationfortheleadershipandmembersofthese held this year (despite extensive “planning” at the Many viable avenues for change exist. days of the year, with Rice students across organizations and for the noble work they do for beginning of last semester) and the recent fiasco at When trying to raise our concerns about the campus participating in various Beer our community, ourselves included (no, of course Sid Richardson College with the unconstitutional system through the proper channels, we have been Bike festivities. Somewhat surprisingly, we’re not biased). However, serious problems must appointment of the entire incoming class of Fellows met with nothing but resistance, excuses and, at however, the Beer Bike races themselves be addressed. Communication is low, progress and utter disenfranchisement of the current Fellows. one point, insults, when our Junior Head Fellow suffer from low turnout every year. By the is slow and accountability is nonexistent. Since Instead of spending our time contributing berated us for being “bad Fellows” because we time students have woken up early, walked we have not yet been able to have a meaningfully to the Rice community in meaningful ways by apparently hadn’t been posting on the Facebook around campus visiting different colleges productive dialogue with the people in the position giving academic advice, hosting review sessions group enough, and that technically we didn’t even and thrown water balloons at their rivals, to change this system, we resort to publicly airing or engaging with each other to discuss our qualify as “active” fellows anymore because we few have the energy to make the trek out to our grievances, concerns and suggestions to the views on the issues I just raised, we are instead hadn’t attended enough OAA-sponsored seminars the tracks. Thresher and the Rice community. bogged down in menial and insignificant tasks lastsemester—thanksforlettingusknowaboutthis The solution is simple: Switch the water Thefullversionofthisop-ed,authoredbyMeera assigned to us by the leadership. When we raise six months into the academic year. But in fact, the balloon fight and the bike races. Begin Namireddy,can be found on the Thresher’s website our concerns about the lack of democracy, the OAA has neither the desire nor the power to regulate the races after a cheer battle, then hold under the title “Rice must reevaluate its academic lack of accountability, our displeasure over the the college Fellows programs. Perhaps the Student the water balloon fight after the races are support systems.” You can view this op-ed as an requirements and expectations placed upon us Association should step in, if they deem these done. appetizer for the main course of Meera’s article. and the overall direction of the programs, nothing concerns worthy of consideration and investigation. Beer Bike is fun until it’s not. Many First, I ask you: What are the goals of these changes. So here we raise a few “common sense It is both Meera’s and my goal to ensure that are faced with a decision after the water two programs? I think the PAAs aim to provide policy” questions. all Rice students can benefit from our academic balloon fight: Make the long, wet, hot, practical academic advice related to scheduling Why isn’t everyone trained with the academic programs, but to realize this we must stop patting and muddy walk all the way to Greenbriar classes, changing majors, transferring to Rice, skills of a PAA? O-Week advisors and freshmen ourselves on the back, recognize the problems Lot for the races or go back, shower and applying to med school, etc., and the Fellows already have to sit through presentations on this that exist and seriously re-evaluate our academic inevitably pass out despite all intentions aim to provide subject-specific knowledge to help information twice, and honestly the knowledge support systems. (or not) to go to the races. By switching the students succeed in individual classes. Second, I have as a PAA above and beyond that is pretty order of events, students wouldn’t have I ask you: Are these programs achieving these insignificant. Why is there not a standardized NicholasHanson-Holtryand y to make this decision. On that note, there goals, or are structural problems within the two Fellows program across all of the colleges? Why Meeraa Namireddy do some colleges accept sophomore Fellows are at least 220 bikers across campus who organizations preventing our PAAs and Fellows areSid Richardson wouldn’t have to miss out on the water from reaching their full potential? applications and others do not? Why doesn’t the balloon fight like they currently do. Other Most of the problems seem to stem from one well-regulated PAA program have a graduation Collegee important Beer Bike traditions, such as central shortcoming: the nature of Rice’s academic awardwhilethecompletelyunregulated,vigilante - seniorss the float parade, could easily be moved support systems. The definitions of our goals, like Fellows program does? How have the campus- and held earlier in the morning before the duties and responsibilities are not commonly wide head PAAs and Fellows addressed these races. understood or agreed upon, and there is virtually issues besides sending us some emails? The truth is that Beer Bike, for most, is no communication between the leadership and There must be a better way to incorporate all more about drinking and the water balloon membership of the programs to resolve this of the PAAs and Fellows into the academic life of fight than the races. Instead of taking away from the water balloon fight, the switch would make the races more prominent. Beer Bike can and should be about all three main events. The fall of empathy and rise of Donald Trump It’s understandable that Rice Program If you’re like me, you’ve watched with dismay to restoring their prominent place in our culture. we could turn away the wrath that seeks out Council hasn’t flipped the schedule in over recent months as Donald Trump sped to the Trump knows fear and anger drive his base, and scapegoats and restore peace and rationality the past. Changes to tradition can be frontofthepackofRepublicanpresidentialnominee he stirs up these emotions at every opportunity. to our civic conversations. If we can muster unpopular, and students would be unlikely hopefuls. If you’re like me, you’ve bemusedly asked His is false empathy, cunningly conceived. the strength to choose empathy over derision, to forgive a poor Beer Bike experience. yourself, “Who is voting for this guy?” I’ve spent University undergraduates, who wield more kindness over anger, I believe we could return However, under the current scheduling, much time thinking about politics in my political social influence than any preceding generation, to democracy’s highest ideals and truly make students disregard the “bike” in “Beer science coursework and during internships in have the unique power to stem this tide of anger America great again. Bike” and the work that bikers, chuggers, Congress, the U.S. Department of Education and the and anxiety by exercising true empathy and The choice is yours and mine. No university pit crews and campus-wide coordinators White House. But it wasn’t until I set aside politics respect. Anger cannot drive out anger, nor can program or policy will do this for us. Rather, it put into the races themselves. and began thinking about my hometown, a small derision drive out stupidity. But if we seek to requires us making the diffi cult daily decisions With the races coming directly after municipality in upstate New York, that an answer understand and respect the perspectives of those to turn from derision to humility, and haste to early morning festivities, students will emerged: Donald Trump is winning because his whose views we could easily flick aside as bigoted, patience. If we at Rice were to make this change transfer the excitement they currently campaign is founded on false empathy. oppressive or otherwise ignorant, we can replace in our own discussions, could we change the have for the water balloon fight onto the This statement may seem ridiculous, even vitriol with kindness, and deafeningly silence course of this campaign? No. But we could lead a races, while the fight will serve as a way for off ensive. How could such a demeaning, the cacophony of hate stirred up by the Trump cultural transformation that would end the ability students to cool down afterwards. Winning demoralizing campaign be even fictitiously campaign. Implementing this practice around of candidates like Donald Trump to stir up a sea of colleges can use the water balloon fight empathetic? But Trump speaks to the experiences those with whom we disagree, let alone those anger and sail to success on it. Making this change as a celebration, and losing colleges of a particular type of American, a type of who support Trump, is challenging. We live in a in our time at Rice and beyond could provide can direct their frustrations at more American found throughout my hometown. culture that derides and dismisses disagreeable much needed relief to our angry, fearful world. appropriate channels, such as Will Rice This type of American has undergone a decade arguments and the ones who make them. 140 So the next time you’re tempted to dish out an and Jones. With the promise of the water of job loss, erosion of their Judeo-Christian- characters leave room for little else. But true undoubtedly epic takedown on Facebook, pause, balloon fight, students will be more likely capitalist-nationalist values in mainstream empathy and respect are the antidotes to anger. breathe and choose empathy. Choose respect. It’s to stay for all the races. culture and alienation from places of power — I’m not asking anyone to equivocate their the solution too the problempr of Donald Trump.rump The change seems simple, and maybe most prominently the university, the media and convictions or set aside their passion — just the deceptively so, yet it has the potential to the government. I find it hard to believe Trump opposite. Empathy and respect can open the door Alex Murrphy phy isa greatly improve Beer Bike for everybody. truly relates to most of his supporters; he was to conversations aff ording us the opportunity to Baker Collelegege Next step: Hosting the water balloon fight actually persuade our fellow citizens, which we can born sucking a silver spoon and will be buried senior in Rice Stadium. President Leebron can in a 24-carat coffi n. But his willingness to “tell it all agree would be a welcome change from the verbal watch from the stands. like it is” in their lives reflects the anger and fear masturbation of the weekly presidential debates. of the Americans to whom I refer. Indeed, many If we truly try to know the hearts and minds of Unsigned editorials represent the majority so fear forever losing their 20th-century cultural those with whom we staunchly disagree, I believe opinion of the Thresher editorial staff . All other dominance, and are so angry at the prospect, that we can immeasurably impact our culture. By opinionpiecesrepresentsolelytheopinionofthe they will embrace his bigoted rhetoric and policy accommodating those whose views are currently piece’s author. proposals. For many, voting for Trump is the key unwelcome in the contemporary university,

Editorial Staff opinions copy Mitch Mackowiak* Editor Jasmine Lin Editor The Rice Thresher, the offi cial student newspaper Editorial and business offi ces are located on the Julianne Wey Editor at Rice University since 1916, is published each second floor of the Ley Student Center: Andrew Ta* sports Tiffany Yip Asst. Editor Wednesday during the school year, except during 6100 Main St., MS-524 Editor in Chief Maddy Adams Editor examination periods and holidays, by the students Houston, TX 77005-1892 Andrew Grottkau Editor backpage Yasna Haghdoost* of Rice University. Phone (713) 348-4801 Sarah Nyquist Designer Joey McGlone Editor Managing Editor Email: [email protected] Riley Robertson Editor Letters to the Editor must be received by 5 p.m. Website: www.ricethresher.org art Miles Kruppa* the Friday prior to publication and must be Carrie Jiang Director online Senior Editor Jake Nyquist Photo Editor Lisa Huang Editor signed, including college and year if the writer is Unsigned editorials represent the majority opinion of Jessica Kelly Asst. Photo Editor a Rice student. The Thresher reserves the rights the Thresher editorial staff . All other opinion pieces news business to edit letters for content and length and to place represent solely the opinion of the piece’s author. Anita Alem* Editor arts & entertainment Juan Saldana Manager letters on its website. Drew Keller* Editor Sophie Newman Editor Shannon Klein Ads Manager Andrew Ligeralde Asst. Editor The Thresher is a member of the ACP, TIPA and Walden Pemantle Editor Justin Park Designer CMBAM © Copyright 2015 Samantha Ding Designer * Editorial Board member 3

by Hannah Todd WILLY WEEK AROUND CAMPUS and Sydney Garrett

The Baker Beer Bike coordinators “Brown is most known for the The Duncan Beer Bike said their college’s Willy Week would number of water balloons we ﬁ ll,” the coordinators said Duncan will include lots of collaboration with other Brown Beer Bike coordinators said. make the most of its quad and colleges. “We produced over 90 trash cans last DuncTank. “We’ve been working with year, almost too many [because] it “Duncan usually has a

CLASSIS ET coordinators at other south colleges results in other colleges trying to steal GERMANITAS strong quad culture that to put on events like capture the fl ag ours when they run out.” involves music, sports, and a south block party the morning According to the coordinators, snacks and beverages,” the of Beer Bike,” Sophie Schnietz, a Beer Brown tower’s fl oor culture results in coordinators said. “However, Bike coordinator, said. high-yield water balloon fi lling. during Willy Week, our quad culture kicks off to Schnietz, a sophomore, said there would also be a “There are lots of mini water balloon fi ghts during another level. Baker-Duncan dodgeball game. She said tailgates are fi lling, which results in a fun competitive environment,” There will be inflatables in the quad, including another important part of the Baker Willy Week experience. the coordinators said. a two-story water slide on Friday, sponsored food “Our tailgates are always really fun with great food and Brown will also host “Charity Bike” on the Friday before all week and Duncan will continue to enjoy the music; for three hours each day of Willy Week, we fi ll water Beer Bike in honor of Samuel Waters, a member of Brown Houston weather with their toes in the DuncTank. balloons and work on the Baker Hell Car,” Schnietz said. who passed away this semester. 50 percent of proceeds of “We are focusing on increasing our number of “During the week, we have a lot of fun night events too.” this event, featuring sponsored bikers, will be donated to water balloons because the lack of water balloons According to Schnietz, Baker students can also look M.D. Anderson in Waters’ name. was something that we had noticed (and probably forward to beer debates, a Mr. Baker contest and a game “There will be a biker on the track at all times during the was obvious to many other colleges) during the of sardines, which is a Baker O-Week tradition that matches event and we hope to get people from all around campus to water balloon fight in Founder’s Court,” the the college’s theme: “Finding Pinot.” come out and cheer or bike,” the coordinators said. coordinators said.

“We probably value our Willy Jones will continue to At Lovett, Willy Week as much as we do our actual celebrate Night Ride, a tradition Week traditions include Beer Bike,” the Hanszen Beer Bike in which Jonesians pile into an infl atable mascot, coordinators said. “We try and dozens of cars and ride around competitive water balloon establish the kind of atmosphere the inner loop. ifi k e - u p,ngll a n dsllcawa during the week where everyone “Music blasts through the car a mud fi ght post-water hangs around, eats, drinks, plays windows as the bike team shows balloon fi ght. games in the quad.” off their skills, biking alongside “We have a 20-foot tall The coordinators said Hanszen’s traditions have the cars and catching the occasional high five from infl atable gorilla that we stand up in our quad on Friday evolved, with the addition of a color powder ‘war’ last year their fellow student fans,” the Jones Beer Bike during our huge alumni tailgate event and [we] start water and a glow-in-the-dark capture the fl ag game this year. coordinators said. “Everyone sings along, honking balloon fi lling more than a week in advance to ensure we “Color Powder War [is] welcome to the whole campus,” and cheering for the bikers, before we all end up at have the most water balloons for the fi ght,” the Lovett the coordinators said. “It off ers people an incentive to the track for Mock.” Beer Bike coordinators said. “On Beer Bike, we do wake- come south, but at the same time it goes by pretty fast, and At Mock Beer Bike, Jones prepares for the real up calls around the college at 4 a.m. and the music starts is just an excuse to get all dirty before the balloon fi ght.” deal with dumplings, nicknames and speeches playing on second fl oor. We party as the sun rises.” The coordinators said their theme, “The Beerlin Crawl: from alumni on Jones’ first victories in 1975 for the The water balloon fi ght is only preparation for the Mr. Gorbachev, Chug Down This Beer” was broad enough women and 1988 for the men. messy chaos of the mud fi ght that follows. to allow for fl exibility. “Jones pride from this event can only be “After the water balloon fi ght when the parade is “[We will host] a Woodstock-esque concert where the matched on Beer Bike morning,” the coordinators beginning, Lovetteers partake in a huge mud fi ght [and] Maggie Brown Band [will play] ’60s music and Hanszenites said. mud wrestling event as the other colleges look at us like [will play] ’60s and other tunes,” the coordinators said. we are crazy,” the coordinators said.

Martel College Beer Bike McMurtry College’s Beer Bike Sid Rich is representing coordinator Chris Johnson said celebrations continues to create their “Red, White, and Brew” Martel is planning on having plenty traditions, according to Beer Bike by competitively fi elding men’s of “vengeance, justice, fi re and coordinator Jessica Kelly. and women’s bike teams. blood” this Willy Week. “Because McMurtry is a “The men’s team has often “Some colleges put time into relatively new college, we have disqualifi ed [itself] on purpose, balloons,” Johnson said. “Some the opportunity to leave a lasting but this year, our bike teams colleges put a lot of eff ort into impact on what traditions are intend to give Will Rice a run training for the races. Others just established and are possibly carried out with McMurtry for their money,” Beer Bike coordinator Adam Jordahl said. party hard. Martel does all of these, but we’re unique in Willy Weeks to come,” Kelly, a senior, said. Sidizens will continue to share their love for America that we construct the single largest build on campus.” McMurtry is continuing several traditions, including a by distributing USA paraphernalia during the Orc Raid. In Build captains freshmen Errol Jordheim and Gigi Rill led large build and an exorbitant number of bananas. this major Sid tradition, Sidizens paint themselves and run the construction of a castle on Martel’s sundeck. “Our predecessors started a beautiful tradition of fi lling across campus “raiding” other colleges. “We’re proud to have pulled off another fantastic our commons and quad with an absurd number of bananas “We plan to celebrate America’s global power by build,” Johnson said. “Get excited.” for consumption and general fun,” Kelly said. “There’s planting little American fl ags around all the colleges during Rill and Jordheim put in roughly 20 hours of building nothing more satisfying than walking down to the quad the raid,” Jordahl, a sophomore, said. time each every week since the spring semester began. at 7 a.m. and seeing a mob of McMurtry students clad in Sidizens can also look forward to laser tag in Sid’s “The build is always a crowd favorite,” Beer Bike banana suits interacting with their fruit counterparts.” basement, the morning wake-up party on Sid seventh coordinator Christina Petlowany said. “Our build captains Kelly also off ered a word of warning to Rice students: [fl oor] and the Mr. Sid competition. have done an amazing job and so many other Martelians “We welcome all members of our other colleges to join, but “We hope to bring lots of people out in support of our have joined in. We’re really excited to see the results.” don’t you dare touch our bananas!” college in the parade and on the tracks,” Jordahl said.

Wiess’s Beer Bike coordinators are Will Ricers are taking their theme to According to graduate student taking advantage of their “Acabowl” heart (“Slammed I Am, by Dr. Booze”) Nick Trenton, Rice should anticipate quad and outdoor halls to host a by ramping up the afterparty. GSA dominating the races. variety of events, old and new. “It’s been hard in the past because “We have a good shot at fi rst “One crowd favorite is our people fall asleep in the afternoon, [place] in all categories,” Trenton said. annual foam party,” Wiess Beer Bike so Beer Bike is over for most people “Grad school can be tough and people coordinator Kunal Shah said. “We are after the races,” Will Rice Beer Bike get busy, but Beer Bike is one of the renting a giant foam pit and placing it coordinator Helen Wei said. few times we can all relax and enjoy a in the middle of the Acabowl.” Wei, a sophomore, said the great day of races and picnics.” Also in the Acabowl, Wiessman should expect afterparty will hopefully rally Will Ricers, although it is open Graduate student Jesse Choe said he recognizes not all infl atables, a puppy study break and a hair cutting event. to all other Rice students. In addition, Wei said she expects students share the same enthusiasm for beer and sports, “Unlike a lot of other colleges, Wiess doesn’t have fl oor a huge showing on the morning of Beer Bike for Will Rice’s so the coordinators have introduced diff erent activities. culture,” Shah, a Wiess senior, said. “So, we’ve decided to dance parties. “Our biggest change is introducing alternative events,” launch a new concept: column culture.” “I think we’re known for dancing on tables,” Wei said. Choe said. “Throughout Willy Week, we will host events Wiess has three columns of dorms, and in addition, Wei said the Night Before Beer Bike is one of Will Rice’s from yoga, to poker, to board games, to a craft-ernoon.” there will be a “column” for off -campus Wiessmen. best traditions, year after year. Beer will still feature in GSA’s celebrations. According “This Thursday is #tbt Thursday and will be featuring “Unfortunately, we can’t disclose much about the Night to Trenton, GSA usually gets 15 to 20 kegs of craft beer COLUMN WARS, where each column will compete in a Before Beer Bike, because it’s a secret thing that just Will donated to them for Willy Week. series of 10 outdoor events for a chance to be crowned the Rice does in preparation for the day ahead,” Wei said. “The “[We] chug beer and wake up at 9 a.m.,” Trenton said. best column,” Shah said. “The event will run much like an freshmen don’t know what to expect, and I think it adds to “What undergrads do at 5 a.m., we do after the races elementary school fi eld day.” the magic of it all.” outside Valhalla at 2 p.m.” 4 BEER BIKE the Rice Thresher Wednesday,M arch 16, 2016

COLLEGE COLORS, THEMES & COORDINA

COLORS

BAKER Red Finding Pinot

PAID FOR BY RICE PROGRAM COUNCIL

BROWN Heather Indigo Alev

DUNCAN Forest Green British Ginv BEER BIKE ADMINISTRATORS HANSZEN Royal Blue The Beerlin Crawl: Mr & THANKS

FACULTY ADVISORS Ryan Morgado, Student Activities JONES Purple High School Br Olivia Barker, Student Activities CAMPUS-WIDE COORDINATORS Annabelle McIntire-Gavlick, Lovett ‘17 Ashton Thrasher, Sid ‘18 LOVETT Navy Blue AREA COORDINATORS Concessions: Ashton Duke, Baker ‘19 Security: Jennifer Kroeger, Lovett ‘19 MARTEL Charcoal Game Track: Astha Mittal, Jones ‘18 Parade: Mike Dai, Wiess ‘19 Judges: Marcos De La Garza, Wiess ‘19 MCMURTRY Light Gray Slurasic Park: An Ad

Thanks to the following organizations: SID RICHARDSON Black Red White CAMPUS ORGANIZATIONS Rice University Police Department Emergency Medical Services Wellness Student Judicial Programs WIESS Goldenrod Booze Clues: Parking Risk Management Environmental Health & Safety Alumni and Alumni Office WILL RICE Maroon Slammed I am. B Housing & Dining Facilities Engineering & Planning Student Activities Academic Affairs and Strategic An even better Partnerships GSA charcoal The Selec STUDENT ORGANIZATIONS Rice Bikes The Rice Thresher CAMPUS-WIDE Judges Wednesday,M arch 16, 2016 the Rice Thresher BEER BIKE 5

ATORS SCHEDULE OF EVENTS

THEME COORDINATORS SATURDAY, MARCH 19, 2016

Finding Pinot: Just Keep Drinking Madeline Eschberger, Sophie Schnietz, 8:00 A.M. Jeffrey Joyce, Samuel Soyebo, Sylvia Martel opens Omozee 8:45 A.M. Hanszen Color Powder War vatar the Last Beerbender Shalini Patibandla, Santiago Avila, Sam 10:00 A.M. May, Alison Lindsay Waterballoon fight 10:30 A.M. vasion: Here Comes the SunGod Anna Meyer, Morgan Glose, Yoseph Lee Parade 11:30 A.M. Alumni Race wl: Mr. Gorbachev, chug down this beer! Rachel Bowyer, Sam Vallagomesa, Joey McGlone, Riley Roberston, Brandon 12:15 P.M. Gordon Women’s Race 1:00 P.M. High School Brewsical: We’re Breaking Frio Alex Lamas, Caitlin Garcia, Anna Men’s Race Kimutis, Shaian Mohammad, Alex Brown

Alcohol City Limits Nirali Desai, Midori Rinkliff, Hector Picon, Lucy Lai, Jake Peacock FOOD e of Patrons: House Martel Veronica Johnson, Chris Johnson, Lydia Dick, Christina Petlowany, Kat Iverson Chick-fil-A Papa John’s Pizza Shipley’s Donuts dventure 65 Million Beers in the Making Jessica Kelly, Madeline Adams, Rachel Valhalla Marren Taco Cabana e and Brew: Let Freedom Drink Alicia Fan, Meg Brigman, Adam Jordahl, Luis Zelaya

Blue Moon Skidoo, Drinks for You! Rachel Lambert, Kunal Shah, Perry Goldstein, Kristina Dickman

Slammed I am. By Dr. Booze Jane Giang, Derek Brown, Max Hasbrouck, Helen Wei, Megan Moore, David Vien ected Works of William Shakesbeer Eric Lewis, Nick Trenton, Jesse Choe

Security Admin 6 BEER BIKE the Rice Thresher Wednesday,M arch 16, 2016 v

CHUG STAND/ LANE FLOAT CONTEST BLEACHER ASSIGNMENTS (one is on the inside) PRIZES ORDER 1st: food truck night of Beer (one is the furthest south) Bike, fine reduction ($1000 total!) 2nd: $500 fine reduction! 1. Will Rice 3rd: $250 fine reduction! 1. McMurtry 2. Hanszen 2. GSA 3. Wiess JUDGES 3. Hanszen 4. Jones Dean Hutchinson 4. Lovett 5. Brown Norie Guthrie 5. Jones 6. Lovett Dr. James DeNicco 6. Martel 7. GSA 7. Sid 8. Sid Richardson CRITERIA 8. Brown 9. Martel ã Theme 9. Will Rice 10. McMurtry ã Creativity 10. Wiess 11. Duncan ã Float aesthetics 11. Baker 12. Baker ã Song 12. Duncan ã Spirit yell Wednesday,M arch 16, 2016 the Rice Thresher BEER BIKE 7

BIKE/CHUG CAPTAINS

MEN’S BIKE CAPTAIN(S) WOMEN’S BIKE CAPTAIN(S) CHUG CAPTAIN(S)

BAKER Chandler Burke Stephanie Brener Jack Kaplan Bryce Willey Mickyle Stanbury Jake Spisak Gabriella Buba Claire Bonnyman

BROWN Greg Kinman Theresa Sonka Jackson Neagli Santiago Avila Alison Lindsay Lianna Amezaga Jim Gehrig

DUNCAN Peter Zilu Tang Amy White Juan Bravo Sarah Siemann

HANSZEN Dan Klein Priya Kane Brett Leatherwood Lauren Williams

JONES Ryan Yeh Momona Yamagami Sameer Kini Justin Trenor Grace Jenkins Michelle Kwan

LOVETT Alex Morton Brandi Ransom Bridget Schilling Jahnavi Jagannath

MARTEL Colin Losey Anna Norris Dylan Dickens Keanu Mitanga Marisa Hudson Audrey Smith Amanda Cervantes Isaiah Barth

MCMURTRY Bryan Bates Rebecca Maher Will Eldridge Ricky Chen Andrea Kopczynski Lauren Rutherford David He

SID RICHARDSON Alex Nunez Rachel Galton Karen Pan

WIESS Raymond Cano Malvika Govil Greg Harper Yoseph Maguire Rachel Ngo Brian Tighe Akash Ghosal Olivia Tati Melissa Cespedes

WILL RICE Carlos Hernandez Michaela Dimoff Marshall Wilson Brian Brenner Marita Sailor

GSA Quentin Funk Emily Evans Dayne Swearer Mary Natoli Loah Stevens 8 BEER BIKE the Rice Thresher Wednesday,M arch 16, 2016

BEER BIKE CAPTAIN RANKINGS by Isaac Schultz Each year, the same questions arise: Will Will Rice Sweep? Who is the dark horse this year? Why does GSA get to compete in the non-alumni races, when they are alumni by definition? We conducted a Beer Bike captain ’s ranking of the men and women ’s teams. Akin to a coach ’s poll, these rankings outline the average expected finishes of each college. Each bike captain submitted a Top 12 with a first - place vote worth 12 points, second place 11 and so on down to one point for 12th place. The chart below indicates the total rankings for each college. Several colleges declined to respond.

WOMEN’S MEN’S CHANGE FROM CHANGE FROM RANKING COLLEGE SCORE RESULTS IN 2015 RANKING COLLEGE SCORE RESULTS IN 2015

1 Jones 75 0 1 Jones 57 0

2 Will Rice 73 0 2 Will Rice 54 1

3 GSA 55 1 3 Martel 50 5

4 Brown 53 8 4 GSA 40 DQ

5 Duncan 50 1 5 Brown 39 0

6 McMurtry 48 1 6 McMurtry 34 4

7 Martel 36 2 7 Duncan 29 0

8 Hanszen 36 4 8 Wiess 22 2

9 Sid Rich 35 6 9 Hanszen 21 5

10 Baker 34 0 9 Lovett 21 1

11 Lovett 28 6 11 Sid Rich 15 DQ

12 Wiess 22 4 12 Baker 12 3

Announcing the Jameson Fellowship For American Decorative Arts 2016-2017 ENGLISH

Rice undergraduates and graduate students interested in art history, history, or museum studies are invited to apply for the Jameson Fellowship in American Decorative Arts and Painting. The Jameson INVITES YOU TO EXPLORE Fellow will spend the 2016-17 academic year as an intern at the Bayou Bend Collection of the Museum of Fine Arts, Houston. Bayou Bend, located in the River Oaks section of Houston, is regarded as the best house museum west of the Mississippi, and contains an outstanding array of American painting, sculpture, and decorative arts from the colonial period through the 19th century. NEW DIRECTIONS The Jameson fellow will enroll each semester for a three-credit, history of art course (HART 400 and 401). The fellow will spend approximately eight hours per week at the Bayou Bend. During the fall term, the intern will concentrate on a project adapted to his or her schedule and interests, and the needs of Bayou Bend. In the spring semester, the Jameson fellow will spend time in a training course taught at Bayou Bend by the education director and curators of the collection. During both semesters, the fellow will be asked to assist with research, exhibitions, public relations, or other aspects of the museum operations.

The stipend for 2016-2017 will be $13,000. Additional funds (up to $1,500) are reserved for a research trip during the time of the fellowship. For Jameson Fellows without access to a car, some help could be available to cover part of one's transportation costs during the year. Qualifications include an excellent academic record and an interest in American art and culture of the 17th through 19th centuries.

Applications should consist of the following: • A brief (2-3 page) typewritten statement expressing the student's willingness to FALL 2016 undertake the internship in 2016-2017, stating how the Fellowship would enhance your other studies at Rice, plans for graduate school, career goals, or general COURSES PREVIEW & ADVISING SESSION interest in the decorative arts. • Academic transcripts (official or unofficial) • One letter of support from a Rice faculty member. WEDNESDAY, MARCH 23, 2016

Applications should be sent to the Jameson Fellowship Committee at the Department of Art History (Herring Hall 103, PIZZA 12-1:00 CUPCAKES 4-5:00 MS-21) no later than Friday, March 25, 2016. Questions may be directed to Professor Joseph Manca ([email protected] or 713-348-3464). COME TO ONE SESSION OR BOTH! In preparation for applying, it is recommended that students acquaint themselves with Bayou Bend either by visiting (call 713-639-7750 for details or visit: http://www.mfah.org/visit/bayou-bend-collection-and-gardens/) or looking at the catalogue HERRING HALL 2ND FLOOR ROOM 255 of the collection by David Warren, Michael Brown, Emily Ballew Neff, and Elizabeth Ann Coleman, American Decorative Arts and Paintings in the Bayou Bend Collection (Houston and Princeton, 1998). This catalogue is available in major bookstores in Houston, including the one in the Museum of Fine Arts, and is found at Rice in The Brown Fine Arts Library (c ll b NK805 A675 1998 lib ly) ALL WELCOME! 9 Musical parody soars in ‘Hello, Hamlet!’ Cannon Lewis Thresher Staff

Though often underappreciated, humor is one of the most difficult things to capture in a play. Humorous works are, by their very nature, inextricably tied to the cultures that produce them. Plays, however, tend to outlive their time periods and creators, and over the years lose many of the nuances and connections that made them hilarious to their original audiences. For this reason, Shakespeare’s plays are often updated, adapted and otherwise re- shaped to recapture the power that is latent in such masterworks of theatre by relating them to our contemporary mores. Though some would argue that its purpose is more parodic than revelatory, Wiess Tabletop’s “Hello, Hamlet!” directed by Wiess College senior Vicky Comesanas, rests soundly in this tradition. Through its clever writing, engaging acting and absolute refusal to take anything seriously, “Hello, Hamlet!” entertains through its wonderfully campy atmosphere. Wiess Tabletop’s 14th production of the famed musical, the cast and crew have once again justified the reputation that “Hello, Hamlet!” has maintained for 49 years. Originally written by Wiessman George Greanias in 1967, “Hello, Hamlet!” is a musical loosely grounded in the dra- matic melancholy of Shakespeare’s “Ham- let.” However, the source material serves only as a jumping off point for a series of musical parodies, pop culture references and satire of Elizabethan norms that make up the bulk of the play. This year’s performance includes, among many others, references to “The Sound of Music,” “Braveheart,” “Footloose,” NSYNC, Rick Perry and, of course, “Frozen.” Beyond simple reference, “Hello, Hamlet!” also parodies the structure of “Hamlet” itself, consistently breaking the fourth wall and commenting on the current production in varied and hilarious style. Full credit for courtesy jasmine zhou this ingenuity goes to the rewrite team of Titus Baker College sophomore Catherine Dunaway and Hanszen College alumnus John ‘Chepe’ Lockett converse Jones College sophomore Justin Bernard, as Tamora and Saturninus in BakerShake’s production of ‘Titus Andronicus’ in the Baker commons. The McMurtry College freshman Shelby Bice, Andronicus show continues this weekend with showings Friday and Saturday at 8 p.m. and Sunday at 2:30 p.m. Martel College senior Kathryn Hokamp and McMurtry junior Riley Smith. From moment one, the cast of “Hello, Hamlet!” is commendably committed to the camp and over-the-top spectacle at the FotoFest to focus on climate change heart of the play, and seems to have a great time in the process. At a cast size of 19, “Hel- Sophie Newman ney, he described especially poignant mo- Like many artists, Natal is not interested lo, Hamlet!” is a massive ensemble piece, A&E Editor ments, like disposing of a dead catfish on in finding solutions to climate change but in and yet every actor leaves their mark. From the beach and listening in on a ceremony for stimulating conversation around the subject. the energy and ridiculous script reading of The future of climate change might be a the deceased at a local church. But Edwards’ “I am committed to using my work as a Marcellus, played by Martel freshman Muna daunting concept, but artists Marina Zurkow, sense of humor also provided for some lighter point of dialogue,” Natal said. “I don’t pre- Uzodike, to the block-headed, Shakespear- Joshua Edwards and Judy Natal take their best moments — trekking through the freezing rain sume to have the answers, but I think it’s an ean gravitas of Laertes, played by Duncan stab at it as part of this year’s FotoFest exhi- on the side of I-90 and coming across a $20 artist’s responsibility to raise the questions.” College freshman Preston Quine, no one bition at Rice University, which explores the bill, for example. Marina Zurkow’s work is highly conceptual fades into the background. Though I can theme “Changing Circumstances: Looking at Edwards’ attention to detail shines in his and focused on what she calls, “near-impos- honestly say that I was impressed by every the Future of the Planet.” series of black and white photographs, which sible nature and culture intersections.” She single actor on stage, McMurtry senior Juan The department for the visual and dramat- are deceivingly simple images with complex likes exploring questions such as, “What does Sebastian Cruz is exceptional in his role as ic arts and the Center for Energy and Environ- meanings. His father was also a photographer, it mean to be an animal?” Hamlet simply by virtue of his endurance. mental Research in the Human Sciences are and Edwards said the decision to shoot in Through her work, Zurkow stresses the im- In addition to singing in about half of the collaborating to host three exhibits, “Another black and white reflects both on his past and portance of “resetting relationships” between songs in the play, Cruz displays exceptional Storm is Coming,” “Dear Climate” and “Photo- his poetic inclinations. humans and nature and understanding how to athleticism as he performs flips and lifts graphs Taken at One Hour Intervals on a Walk “Since I’m a poet, I’m really interested in rethink the way in which we relate to animals. that seem impossible on the crowded Wi- from Galveston Island to the West Texas Town ink on the page,” Edwards said. “I wanted the “Unknowing things has become really im- ess stage. Ophelia, played by Lovett College of Marfa.” The projects will be on display in relationship between the poems and the pho- portant to me,” Zurkow said. sophomore Ronnie McLaren, also stands the Rice Media Center and the space between tographs to be like that. I like how formal it is. Her exhibit, “Dear Climate,” which is de- out in this respect, as she performs almost the Tudor Fieldhouse and the Moody Center I’m much more interested in the shape of the scribed on its website as a “conceptual nudge as many antics as Cruz while maintaining a for the Arts construction site. The ongoing photograph than the subject.” (not a paradigm shift),” explores how we think clear, beautiful singing voice. Finally, Wi- Rice Gallery exhibit, “The Great Cape Rinder- For Judy Natal, the inspiration for her proj- and feel about the climate through short let- ess senior Sean Doyle and Jones freshman horn” and “Intimate Cartography,” a project ect was more spontaneous. The title for her ters and posters. The exhibit is a collaborative Dorian Korein absolutely steal the show as by six Glasscock School of Continuing Studies exhibition, “Another Storm is Coming,” comes project with artists Una Chaudhuri Oliver Kell- Rosencrantz and Guildenstern. In addition students are also participating spaces. from a piece of graffi ti inundated by Katrina hammer, Fritz Ertl and Sarah Rothberg. to constantly breaking the fourth wall, this While all of the artists’ projects center that she discovered eight years later. With 68 posters and six audio tapes, the duo sits in the audience maintaining a run- around the theme of climate change, they The project includes photographs in addi- materials sound overwhelming, but each ning commentary for almost half the play, each have very diff erent ways of conceptualiz- tion to video material of interviews conducted poster is minimalist in design and ink usage, and even continued acting during the inter- ing the idea. For Joshua Edwards, it is through with citizens along the Gulf Coast. Natal said which, according to Zurkow, makes reprinting mission. walking and photography. the phrase “Another Storm is Coming” was them more cost-eff ective. As in previous leap years since the late Edwards’ project centers on the idea of provocative for many of her subjects, which in- The goal of the project is precisely this: to 1960s, “Hello, Hamlet!” has returned to the home. Having completed walks with his wife cluded a game warden, a life rancher, a game encourage people print and share the messag- Wiess stage in magnificent fashion. I thor- in Mexico, Edwards embarked on an on-foot redactor and a Catholic priest. es, which include “Sleep … around” (paired oughly enjoyed my time in the audience, journey that took him from his birthplace of Previously, Natal had experience inter- with a sketch of a human hugging a bear) and and I regret that I cannot give more credit Galveston to the tiny West Texas town of Mar- viewing Hurricane Katrina survivors in New “Spend quality time with an insect.” You can in this review than I already have. If you fa, where he and his wife are currently build- Orleans to understand their experience. find printable posters at dearclimate.net. enjoy referential comedy, theatre parody, ing a home. “There was a veneer that everything was These three exhibits will be on display at singing, dancing or simply having a great A poet by training, Edwards tends to see OK, but if you scratch the surface you find this their respective sites through April. Please time, this is the show for you. Make sure to life through a symbolic lens. Along his jour- really deep trauma,” Natal said. visit fotofest.org for more details. go see it during Beer Bike weekend. 10 A&E the Rice Thresher Wednesday,M arch 16, 2016

WHAT’S HIP RIGHT NOWby kaylen strench FOOD: PODCAST: ART: TV: Ice cream stuﬀ ed ‘The Anxiety Coaches’ Museum of Broken ‘Cuckoo’ doughnut cones Relationships

courtesy the anxiety coaches

courtesy bubbly desion co In a phrase: A delightful series for the courtesy netflix anxious. In a phrase: Exactly what I just said. Where to find it: iTunes store, courtesy la times In a phrase: Andy Samberg at his finest. Where to find it: Make it yourself, or go to anxietycoachespodcast.com. Where to find it: The first season just came Prague. In a phrase: The saddest museum in the world. to Netflix. It’s no question that a significant Where to find it: Los Angeles, California. This time of year in Houston, it’s natural proportion of students at Rice has Netflix has been cranking out new series for cravings for sugary fried doughs to experienced anxiety. As one such student What is one to do with that emotion- lately, and it can be hard to pick apart skyrocket. With the right wind, one can myself, I can vouch for the fact that it’s filled memorabilia from a relationship the good from the mediocre. I’m here to smell the beautiful wafts of grease rising not a good time — in fact, having anxiety gone bad? Throwing it away is too painful say that sitcom “Cuckoo,” a show already out of Reliant Park from a mile away. is a lonely and terrifying experience. One- — though keeping it even more so. You can loved in Britain (it premiered on the BBC) Though the Rodeo can supply you with on-one face time with a therapist can be pawn the expensive stuff, but what about definitively falls in the former category. The everything from fried cookie dough to New important, but is not always immediately the old mixtapes, the formerly beloved show follows the Thompson family, whose Orleans-style beignets, it’s short one trendy accessible. stuffed animal, the journal full of sweet daughter Rachel returns from abroad in treat that is capturing foodies’ hearts: ice Enter “The Anxiety Coaches,” a nothings? Thailand with a very strange new boyfriend cream stuffed doughnut cones. podcast for anxiety sufferers by anxiety Now, you can make it art. LA’s brand- (the show’s namesake). Ice cream stuffed doughnut cones are all sufferers. The coaches aren’t medical new “Museum of Broken Relationships” Samberg’s bongo playing, potato the rage in their city of origin, Prague, and professionals, they’re just normal, average takes such sweet, emotional things from van driving, yak hat wearing Cuckoo is recently, on Instagram. It’s for good reason, people who bring on professionals to help relationships gone awry — and not just simultaneously horrible and lovable to too: These babies feature a cinnamon address everything from panic attacks to romantic ones, either. People donate things both the viewer and Rachel’s parents and sugar-covered doughnut, coated in either agoraphobia in a light, non-condescending that remind them of ended relationships brother. While he conforms to several new- nutella or berry compote, and filled to the tone. With 175 episodes (they do two a with friends, family members, even their agey tropes (heavy hallucinogenic drug top with either ice cream or whipped cream week) there’s plenty of material to keep you former selves. At once beautiful and tragic, use, meditation, etc.), he is hilariously and strawberries. I think they’re worth a occupied when you just need someone to the LA museum makes one man’s misery, unpredictable, and every episode’s plotline plane ticket to Europe, but that’s just me. talk you down. another man’s artistic masterpiece. feels fresh. I say it’s hip.

100 YEARSof THRESHER Join us in celebrating the Thresher’s 100th year with our centennial magazine.

April 8, 2016 | 11:30 a.m. - 1 p.m. Academic Quad 11 Duplantier returns strong from injury

Andrew Grottkau Sports Editor

Junior pitcher Jon Duplantier never considered himself a baseball player until midway through high school. Now, just five years later, he is one of the best college baseball players in the country and is projected to be a top-100 pick in the upcoming Major League Baseball draft. So far this season, the Owls star has a 3.33 earnedrunaverageandisaveragingawhopping 10.7 strikeouts per nine innings. In a recent game against the University of Central Florida, Duplantier struck out 14 batters and gave up just one earned run on his way to his first win of the year. He was later named the Conference USA Pitcher of the Week for his performance. The road to reach this point, however, has not been easy. Duplantier achieved instant success at Rice during his freshman year and was named to the Freshman All-Conference team. After a successful summer season, he said he entered his sophomore year with more confidence than ever. “I came back [from summer break] and my chest was puffi ng out,” Duplantier said. “Everyone still saw me through my successes from the summer.” Unfortunately, Duplantier’s good fortune would not continue. After taking a break from throwing for the entire fall semester, he sustained an arm injury. According to Duplantier, the injury was a result of his own routine. “It was really just a mismanagement of my arm,” Duplantier said. “I progressed too quickly in the winter leading up to the spring and caused some inflammation in my arm. I just couldn’t get rid of it; I kept trying to throw on it but some muscles had shut down.” The injury caused Duplantier to miss his entire sophomore season. Although it was frustrating, he said the lost season gave him valuable perspective. “I got hurt, and the team had to just move on,” Duplantier said. “They couldn’t sirui zhou/thresher look at me and say, ‘He’s still the man, he’s Sophomore pitcher Ricardo Salinas winds up to pitch against the University of Central Florida on March 6 at Reckling Park. going to be really good,’ because I couldn’t Rice won the contest 13-10 to conclude its three-day series against UCF. The Owls went 2-1 against the Knights and are now 8-7 help anybody. It knocked me down a little. It Wind up definitely humbled me.” on the season. Rice will play this Saturday at 6 p.m. in San Antonio against the University of Texas, San Antonio. Now that he has returned from the injury, Duplantier has reassumed his role as a leader of the pitching staff . He has held batters to just a .183 batting average this year, barely missing a beat following the lost season. Despite his Kidd’s Korner success, Duplantier said he still has areas in which he can improve. Basketball is giving their all on the court, so fans should give their all from the stands “My ultimate success will come when I can understand what kind of pitcher I am and what Last Wednesday, both of the Rice in anticipation of the upcoming games. The that really wishes to see these teams succeed kind of pitcher I’m going to be,” Duplantier said. basketball teams were in action fighting to women were playing Louisiana Tech University on the court. These teams remain in the lower “I need to stay within those parameters.” keep their seasons alive in the Conference and the men were scheduled to play the tier of Conference USA because of a lack of For the moment, though, he said he is USA tournament in Birmingham, Alabama. University of North Carolina, Charlotte an hour support and an apathy for what the players making sure to enjoy the chance to pitch this Heading into these marquee matchups, there later. The live streams were available online and coaches strive to do for the programs’ season. were many similarities between the two through the American Sports Network and futures. As for the games, they were very “I’m trying to go deep into games, save the teams. Both squads received No. 10 seeds in the small group of mostly Duncaroos began rewarding to watch. The teams’ performances bullpen, and keep the team in the running to the tournament and faced No. 7 seeds in the to hoot and holler at the screen as their fellow did not disappoint. The men’s team saw their win games,” Duplantier said. “I’m just having opening round. Each team had experienced an classmates and friends began playing. season end after losing a hard-fought game to fun right now.” up-and-down final month of the year. Over a Sitting all around me were some of my the University of North Carolina, Charlotte, IfDuplantiercontinuestodohisjobwell,the span of two weeks in mid-February, the women favorite Duncaroos who have a true love for 79-69. The women’s team, however, upset Owls may have a chance to yet again compete won four out of five contests before dropping the Owls basketball teams that I hope can one seventh-seeded Louisiana Tech University in in the NCAA tournament. Rice currently holds the last two of the season. The men performed day spread to the entire student body. Sergio overtime, 72-67, to advance to the Conference a record of 8-7 on the season after winning similarly, winning four straight games to rise Santamaria, perhaps the most vocal and USA tournament quarterfinals. Unfortunately, two out of three games this weekend against to the middle of the C-USA standings before passionate Rice basketball fan there is, was the women’s team’s season ended there as it nationally ranked East Carolina University. losing their last three regular season games. constantly hollering at the screen in his usual fell to Middle Tennessee State University. While the Owls’ record is not as good as they But, as is the case every March, when cadence as if he was at Tudor Fieldhouse. Rice Rising is not a myth for Rice’s hoped it would be, Duplantier said nobody on teams are competing to lock down regular Jeremy Reiskind, the president of Rice Rally basketball programs. Both teams showed the team is panicking. season championships, win their conference Club, was working hard on the online streams something in the way they performed in the “We’ve started off slow, but I don’t think tournaments or earn NCAA tournament or to have both games up simultaneously conference tournament and it is this: The anybody in our organization is worried about National Invitation Tournament berths, the while continually browsing his Twitter feed future is bright for Rice basketball. They are it,” Duplantier said. “We’re growing; everybody intensity rises. The games become win or go for the latest nugget of information. Fasai doing their part, so the student body must now is still learning.” home. “March Madness” ensues. No matter Phuathavornskul, a freshman cheerleader who do its part and support them. When asked about his hopes for the season, the statistics, every team has a chance to attended nearly all of the regular season home Duplantier said he is focused on the team’s do something special. The Rice men’s and games, brought her physics textbook with her goals, not his own. women’s basketball teams are no diff erent. The to study and watch at the same time but got Michaelael Kidd isa “My No. 1 goal this spring is to go win a fans and support, however, are what I feel are so caught up in the two games that she didn’t LovettC Collegeollege national championship with the Rice Owls,” diff erent but should not be that way for long. bother to open it up. junior Duplantier said. “I’m just going out there every I was extremely excited to watch the These individuals have been loyal fans week trying to do my part.” two Owls teams play and perhaps do since day one and were extremely great to The Owls will be in action on Friday something incredible. Additionally, this watch the games with. These are the fans that when they open conference play against was an opportunity to see teams compete in need to inspire other members of the student the University of Texas, San Antonio in San postseason atmospheres and perhaps grow in body and have been already making eff orts Antonio at 6 p.m. That game will be the first the process. I arrived at Duncan College room to do so. The way our men’s and women’s of a three-game weekend series for the Owls 248 to a small group of fellow peers crowded basketball programs will rise up is through the as they begin their quest for a 21st straight around a broken projector screen and a laptop belief that they are supported by a student body conference title. 12 BACKPAGE the Rice Thresher Wednesday,M arch 16, 2016 A Backpage Guide to... WILLY WEEK FILLING BALLOONS MEN’S RESOURCE CENTER There are a few main schools of thought on balloon Continuing its long-standing tradition of using filling. We have found that the most effective strategy is Willy Week to celebrate the beauty of the phallus, the JAXXX to steal filled balloons from a neighboring college, Men’s Resource Center will be hosting a plethora of For those who are less imaginative, we at perhaps replacing them with IOUs, Tetra gift cards or masculine-themed events all week. In case you the Backpage have taken it upon ourselves to headshots of various college masters. However, if you missed it, the Better Early than Never Boys had an provide some ideas to galvanize your college really must fill balloons of your own, we have tips for awareness meeting in the RMC on Monday. While they before Saturday’s festivities. Now, to prosely- that as well. had scheduled to begin at 10:30 a.m., the boys quickly tize some vanilla, plain Jane jacks would be a For starters, you must consider what fluid you would realized that they’d never be able to conceal their disservice to our viewership, so we intend to like to fill your balloons with. We have found that a 1-to-4 excitement until then, and had finished their event by use every ounce of ink henceforth to describe ratio of urine to water is prime, but, by all means, exper- 9:45 a.m. to a crowd of faces that, though they prom- the more heinous manifestations of good, ol’ iment yourself to see what works best. ised they weren’t, were definitely concealing some fashioned fun. Next comes the knot. Experts will tell you that the judgment. standard knots are the windsor and the half windsor. Testosterone Tuesday, as always, was a rousing The Wet Willy While the half windsor has a lot to offer in terms of success. Keg stands, high fives and muscle shirts Dress in your finest lingerie and splay style, we believe that the one cannot go wrong with the littered the academic quad, while Griffin Thomas yourself across William Marsh Rice’s lap in the classic style of the windsor. secured his place as SA president upon emerging Academic Quadrangle. Every time a passerby Once you have these details decided, you should be victorious in the wrestling tournament. draws too near, pour room-temperature ready to start filling! For this part, you’re going to want Of course, we’re all looking forward to the climax of vegetable oil on them like you’re Scylla and at least five beers in you because it can get pretty boring. the week, the Payday Party on Friday afternoon. And they’re Odysseus and his sailors. Nothing like A break for shotgunning on every 10th balloon is also a though the number has slightly increased in recent some warm seamen. recipe for success. Once you have filled about 15 years, we just can’t wait to hear those echoing chants balloons or had another five beers (whichever comes of “Come on boys, let’s holler! 70 cents on the dollar!” Autumn Breeze first), you may as well go ahead and call it a day. Finish that signifies the culmination of all the Center’s long, Eat some Mexican food. Not a ton, but floating the keg, and then take a nap before skipping hard work. Because after all, at the end of the day, it’s enough to get the gases flowing. Make your the rest of your classes. not about the week — it’s about the willies. way to your least favorite college, or your friends’ sleeping faces (up to you), and gently send your regards through that olfactory-stir- ring orifice we know so well. Executed proper- GOING TO THE RACES DRINKING TIPS ly, this will churn the minds and stomachs of By this point of the day, you may very well have forgot- People say that Beer Bike is a marathon and not a those you touch for days to come. ten that there is a race to go see. Don’t worry, you’re not race. While we agree with the sentiment of this, we alone in that regard. Now you have to decide whether or would also like to be clear that both marathons and TP LB not to go to the races, and for that decision the following races are pretty lame. Also, we disagree with this You may think this self-explanatory, but it’s must be considered: sentiment entirely. not. As Rice students, we pride ourselves on 1. Your fun buzz is beginning to turn into a fatigued We prefer to think of Beer Bike as a holy day of unconventional everything. So, instead of the stupor. You need to find a bed or more booze ASAP before a hedonistic pleasures where absolutely nothing moderate house TPing seen in most of total meltdown. counts and you are pretty much invincible. Or, if you small-town America, you must be a little more 2. You’re sopping wet from the water balloon fight and prefer, you could even think of Beer Bike as a compe- extreme. Every time you see Leebron, whether cake-flavored vodka (those last few shooters got a bit tition to see who can have the most fun, whatever walking through the quad or sipping coffee, messy). You imagine skipping the races for a hot shower, that entails! hurl rolls of toilet paper over him. Continue to but then you remember the first point, mentioned above. In order to be crystal clear, we are advocating that unravel a fine white canvas upon good ol’ Prez 3. You are confident that you could crush a large pizza, you drink yourself silly. You can double fist Four until his squeals are stifled by the single-ply. a dozen donuts and a Taco Bell big box if you had the Lokos, keg stand until your arms go numb, or finally resources. There will be food at the races, but damn … pull a Ke$ha and brush your teeth with a bottle of Mississippi Mud Bowl that’s quite a walk. Jack, just like you’ve always dreamed of. Get some cow pies and put one in every 4. You wish to show your support for this great tradition Just remember, anything goes and nothing bad Brown student’s mailbox. Take the leftovers and the members of your college who have put in the time can happen, so let’s have some fun! and plop them into brown paper bags. Place to practice and compete in it. one outside every Brownie’s door, and with After weighing these options for about 15 seconds or the other members of your college, set them so, you recall that you think you heard someone say that a alight. Make it out before the fire alarm goes keg is being tapped at a nearby college. You decide to off — this time it’s for real. pound two more beers there before grabbing a roadie, to be consumed as a shower beer before calling it a day. You can see the races next year (lol).

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