THE VOICE OF CHICAGO’S GAY, LESBIAN, BI AND TRANS COMMUNITY SINCE 1985 June 11, 2008 • vol 23 no 39 www.WindyCityMediaGroup.com LGBTs have historic meeting with church BY WILLIAM BURKS ingful conversation about this.” tending the meeting included Ron Ercoli, one of Kathleen “You can’t really have honest, healthy con- the church’s community care leaders, Justin Pol- On Sun., June 8, 30 members of LGBT families versation with somebody that you don’t know ing, a member for 30 years, and Betty Schmidt, a Rose attended Willow Creek Church in suburban South or trust or you might fear just because they’re church elder whom Wallner knew and with whom Barrington and met afterwards with Rev. Bill unknown,” Lutes said. “Now, we’re not unknown. she spoke with privately after the meeting. Winter Dies page 6 Hybels as part of the “American Family Outing” They’re known to us, and we’re known to them, Schilt said at the end of their meal, Lutes sponsored by Soulforce and three other organi- and we hope in some yet-to-be-defined way asked Hybels if he “would take up the challenge zations. that we can keep the conversation going with of speaking more clearly on behalf of our com- Jay Bakker, son of Jim Bakker and Tammy Faye them.” munity when he can—certainly as someone who Messner and pastor of Revolution Church in New Paige Schilt, Soulfource’s media director, char- believes that reparative therapy doesn’t work York, led the group, which included Soulforce acterized the meeting as “very productive, very and that sexual orientation of itself is not sin- Executive Director Jeff Lutes, his partner and intense, “ and “one of the deepest” of the series ful. Even though there’s still distance between their three adopted children. of church meetings the organization is sponsor- that position and our totally gay-affirming po- “The [post-worship] meeting was quite suc- ing over the course of six weeks. sition, there’s still a lot he could do in terms cessful in a number of ways,” Lutes said. “This Mary Lou Wallner, who believes the homopho- of leadership on things that would create a lot was about making connections—person-to-per- bic teachings she received from Willow Creek and more safety and protection for our community. son and family-to-family—and I think we did that she passed on to her lesbian daughter to be that. I respect Willow Creek for having the cour- partly responsible for her suicide in 1997, said Turn to page 4 Milwaukee age and the willingness to really have a mean- that in addition to Hybels, Willow Creek staff at- PrideFest page 27 FATHER’S DAY SPECIAL All in the family BY ROSS FORMAN They first met at Starbucks in Lakeview after Lady Gaga chatting on Gay.com. Then it was a pizza date at Idol for Erik Sosa and Mark Kibby, followed by din- page 18 ner at Rise Restaurant—enduring an hour wait before chowing on sushi. While waiting for their table at Rise, they talked about everything, from values to background to upbringing. “It was very June 11, 2008 #948 clear that we had extremely similar values,” Kib- by (now Mark Sosa-Kibby) said. Sosa (now Erik Sosa-Kibby) added: “Both of us knew that we wanted a family. How we were nightspots going to get that family, being gay, we didn’t n know.” Gay Idol Worship pick it up Well those dates eight years ago weren’t just Who will reign victorious as our 2008 Windy City Gay Idol? inSIDE page 16-17 A part of history at All the way gay... in Halifax, Sidetrack. Nova Scotia. page 24 page 22 take it home idle chats. They started dating immediately, moved in together six months later and, a year or so later, Mark developed a five-year plan for the pair. They planned their professional goals and housing plans, but nothing about kids or a family. In the fall of 2005, the two started thinking Clockwise from bottom left: Cole, Mark, Erik Turn to page 10 www.WindyCityQueercast.com and Parker Sosa-Kibby have those family ties. Photo courtesy of Erik Sosa-Kibby 2 June 11, 2008 WAKE UP BOYSTOWN WWW.WAKEUPPEOPLE.COM *CAFFEINE: DIET PEPSI MAX 46MG VS. DIET PEPSI 24MG PER 8 FL OZ. Moon City Productions • 11 Park Place • NYC 10007 • 212.532.7443 CLIENT: PEPSI JOB: Diet Pepsi Max PUB: Windy City Times SIZE: 10.25 X 13.5 - nonbleed COLORS: 4/C Date: 6 / 5 / 2008 June 11, 2008 3 index News Judicial setback 4 Historic church meeting 4 Kathleen Rose Winter dies 6 WTTW’s bomb threat 6 Lesbian museum CEO 6 Lesbians mark the big 2-5 6 Local news; Lambda’s forum 7 Lottery event 8 Howard Brown’s peace garden 8 Profile: The Sosa-Kibby family 10 View: Reproduction options 10 Merrill Lynch’s Nora Weisberg (left) Nat’l news; world roundup 11 and Karen Rabin were among the many ‘Out & Proud in Chicago’ 12 attendees at Lambda Legal’s Forum Lake View; Quotelines 13 Conveniens. Read more on page 7. Kuda; successful debut 14 Photo by Yasmin Nair ENTERTAINMENT Dancin’ Feats 15 Gay Idol finalists: profiles 17 More Idol: Pearce, Lady Gaga 18 Theater 19 Knight at the Movies 22 Disc and That: DVDs 23 DVD review: Our House... 24 Book reviews by Kuda, Nair 26 Bent Nights: R.E.M. 26 Milwaukee PrideFest 27 Travel: Halifax, Nova Scotia 27 OUTLINES Read about the Sosa-Kibby family, which Real estate; classifieds 24-25 includes fathers Mark (right, above) and FriendsYouKnow.com 28 Erik, as well as sons Cole and Parker (left, above) on the cover and on page 10. Calendar; Estrojam; MCA 29 Sports: Rugby, Robin Roberts 30 Photo courtesy of Erik Sosa-Kibby www. Windy This week’s online-only features include: City —Media Watch Media —Landscaping tips —Terri Schlichmeyer Group (right) book review: The Compassionate .com Carnivore www.WindyCityQueercast.com What’S COOKIN’? Author Stephen Bieniek discusses his new drag cookbook “Cooking Doesn’t Have To Be A Drag!”. Photo by Ryan Kolodziej nightspotsn 4 June 11, 2008 tected liberty interest and then applies a stan- one’s status as a homosexual.” Judicial dard of review that lies between strict scrutiny Aubrey Sarvis—executive director of Service- and rational basis,” said the panel. To that ex- members Legal Defense Network (SLDN), which setback in tent, the 1st Circuit agreed with the 9th Circuit Aubrey led the challenge—said the organization would in the Witt case, but then, it departed. It said Sarvis. consult with the plaintiffs to assess whether to the Lawrence decision recognized “only a nar- Photo by appeal to the full 1st Circuit. military case rowly defined liberty interest in adult consensual Bob Roehr The lawsuit, Cook v. Gates, was filed in De- BY LIsa KEEN sexual intimacy in the confines of one’s home cember 2004 by 12 servicemembers who were KEEN NEWS SERVICE and one’s own private life.” discharged for being gay. The military’s policy, said the panel, calls for Congress passed the “don’t ask, don’t tell” In a stunning defeat, a relatively progressive discharge of a service member “who engages policy in 1993 and, since it went into effect in federal circuit court ruled June 9 that a consti- in a public homosexual act or who coerces an- 1994, more than 11,000 gay servicemembers tutional challenge against the military’s “don’t other person to engage in a homosexual act.” Clinton appointee. have been discharged. One of the primary rea- ask, don’t tell” policy was properly dismissed by Although the policy also calls for dismissing a Saris said she disagreed with her colleagues sons offered for the policy was that the pres- a lower court. But in doing so, the court became service member who engages in consensual sex on only one aspect of the ruling: She believes ence of gays would create sexual tension among the second federal appeals court in less than a off base in the privacy of their home, said the the policy does violate a servicemember’s First troops in close quarters and, thus, threaten unit month to say that the U.S. Supreme Court deci- panel, the policy was “an exercise of Congressio- Amendment right to say she or he is gay “if the cohesion. sion in Lawrence v. Texas requires that laws di- nal judgment in the area of military affairs” and [policy] is applied to punish statements about ©2008 Keen News Service rected at private same-sex conduct be justified warrants enormous deference. by more than just a rational reason. “Here, … there is a detailed legislative record During oral arguments concerning Congress’ CHURCH from cover in March 2007, attorneys reasons for passing the representing former ser- Read about the [“don’t ask, don’t tell” And he responded really positively to Jeff’s of- vicemembers challenging latest policy]. This record fering that challenge to him.” the policy argued that a makes plain that Con- According to Lutes, Hybels “has no trouble lower court judge, who happenings gress concluded, after with people being gay, lesbian, bisexual or had dismissed their case, considered delibera- transgender, and he does not believe it’s a failed to consider the in the tion, that the Act was choice, so he seemed appalled when we shared 2003 ruling in Lawrence necessary to preserve with him that many churches force LGBT people striking down sodomy presidential race the military’s effec- to get married in order to deal with their sexual laws.