Jim Ehlinger & Arthur Anderson
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I’m a pretty bright guy most of the time, but • Why can’t young people today realize when there are a few things I just can’t figure out. a crappy song is a remake of a once great song So I figured maybe you can help. Here goes. or a junk movie was once a great movie. I’m (Bryce is grumpy.) not too old, but, still, I have a strong knowl- edge of the music, movies and cultural high- I don’t understand... lights of my parents era. Why can’t teenagers (Don’t get mad, my well-cultured teenage • Why is it that I can have three toppings on my friend, I’m not talking about you) pay enough pizza for a special price but I can’t have one attention to the culture of 20 years ago to un- topping on one side and four on the other? In derstand that and all the abominations of Jes- the end, I’m sacrificing 1 topping there, man! sica Simpson and every other pop wannabe One and four equals five, not six, but the rocket were once other people’s good ideas. And scientist at the pizza place couldn’t seem to see movies like Shrek are ten times funnier if you it that way. More than three toppings on one know the original cultural events all the jokes side of the pizza set something in his world are referencing. Those who ignore the past out of balance and he could not compute the are doomed to repeat it. (Did someone say math. There was no friggin’ way I was getting Pussycat Dolls?) Oh, and on that front... one more topping on that side of the pizza, but I was welcome to have two more on the other. • Why on earth would you ever remake a song That’s customer service excellence. Speaking if you have no intention of changing it in any of that... measurable way from the original. I know, I know, CASH! Worse yet, why does every pop- • Why do all customer service representative ular rock or R&B ballad that comes out get automatically assume you are a complete remade, not eventually but within the month idiot even if you tell them you’re practical- (before the body is even cold), as a country ly an expert in the subject you are calling version by some rising star hack? What, coun- about. Our editor Tim called Apple because try fans can’t cross-over? Bull! I think it’s a his laptop monitor was cracked, apparently case of people being spoon-fed whatever the by overheating. (That’s seriously what Apple entertainment execs hink they need and not told him.) The guy suggested first that Tim try realizing they’re eating dung. How else do to restart his computer. You should see all the you account for the existence of Urkel and the colors TIm can turn in his face when he’s, Olsen Twins? The whole late ‘90s TGIF line-up shall we say, off-put. Same goes for the pizza for that matter. I’m not saying you can never guy who can’t fathom four toppings. Here’s a remake something. But it better be unique and tip for him: If I give you specific directions to it better not be the song you get famous from. our office, it’s because your drivers can never find it. I’m doing this FOR YOU! So don’t • Why don’t all the rich rock stars who claim blow me off or I’m telling the driver (when to hate Tickemaster as much as I do pool their he calls from the car, completely lost) that resources to fund a competing service to put you were given detailed instructions and he those greedy jerks out of business and put the should call you back and ask. I don’t need hundreds of millions of dollars of profit into a the pizza that bad. cause? Oh, how they love their causes. • Why is there Braille on drive up ATMs? • Why is Nickeback famous? Seriously. Shame on someone! • Why can people park in front of my house on without a residential parking permit every • Why does my editor Tim keep defending the Wednesday for six years and never get a tick- Bears’ Rex Grossman? He’s the worst quar- et, but a friend parks there for five minutes on terback since George Plimpton. I saw better a Tuesday night and gets a $7 ticket? You don’t football from Laura Ingalls in an episode of suppose it has anything to do with the fact Little House on the Prairie where they invent- that there’s mass going on across the street ed the forward pass by throwning a blind kid on Wednesdays? I guess it’s the work of God over the defense to score a touchdown. (Seri- and I shouldn’t question it. Perhaps I should ously... look it up.) Not that Griese’s any bet- find out where exactly in the city code it says ter. But the lesser of two turds is still a turd. that all parking restrictions are lifted for God. Or perhaps I should save their tickets and put I got more, but I’m out of space, so I’ll let them on other cars on Wednesday. I imagine them brew inside me until I can’t take it any- God will sort it out. more. Then you’ll get part 2. The 365ink crew... faces you already know! Tim Brechlin Mike Ironside Tanya Graves Ellen Goodmann Kelli Kerrigan Ralph Kluseman Gary Olsen Matt Booth L.A. Hammer Chris Wand Pam Kress-Dunn Joey Wallis In this Issue of 365ink ... ISSUE # 40 Upstart Crow’s New Show: 4 OCTOBER 4 - 17 Community Events: 5 - 6 Haunted For est : 6 VOICES Closing Party: Cover Story: Abdul & Rafic 7 Sinno, River Panoramas: 8-9 Micheal Gulezian @ CFA: 10 Fly By Night Birthday: 11 Pepper Sprout...YUM!: 12-13 Festival Trio: 14-15 Live Music Listings: 16-17 Wando’s Movie Reviews: 18 ZZ Top: 19 Mayor Roy Buol: 20 Giving Voice: Pam Kress-Dunn: 21 Bob’s Book Reviews: 22 Mattitude: 23 4 Feature Events to Enjoy: 24 Eating Healthy: 25 The A Factor: 26 Crossword / Sudoku: 27 Trixie Kitsch: 28 Dr. Skrap’s Horoscopes: 28 20 Dirty Hands: 29 Comedy: 30 Art on the River II: 31 The Inkwell Publisher: Bryce Parks ([email protected]) Editor: Tim Brechlin ([email protected]) Advertising: Kelli Kerrigan ([email protected]) 563-451-9365 Ad Design: Tanya Graves ([email protected]) Photography: Mike Ironside, Joey Wallis, Ron TIgges, Bryce Parks Writers & Content: Mike Ironside, Tim Brechlin, Ellen Goodmann, Bryce Parks, L.A. Hammer, Chris Wand, Mayor Roy Buol, Matt Booth, Robert Gelms, Angela Koppes, Pam Kress-Dunn Graphic Design & Layout: Bryce Parks, Mike Ironside, Tim Brechlin Special thank you to: Jim Heckmann, Bob & Fran Parks, Kay Kluseman, Bob Johnson, Todd Locher,Dave Blake, Everett Buckardt, Julie Steffen, Sheila Castaneda, Tom Miller, Renae Gabrielson, Christy Monk, Katy Brechlin, Ron & Jennifer Tigges and all the 365 friends and advertisers for all your support. You are all 365. Dubuque365 • 210 West 1st Street, Dubuque, IA, 52001 Office Phone or Music/Events/Movie Hotline 365 @(563) 588-4365 All contents (c) 2007, Community, Incorporated. All rights reserved. Roy Buol Ron Tigges Robert Gelms Brad Parks Angela Koppes Bryce Parks We’ve hidden 365’s WANDO somewhere in this issue of Dubuque365ink. Can you find the master of movies buried within these pages? Hint: He’s tiny and could be anywhere ! Good Luck! Win ners get a free warm fuzzy felling in your belly! - DARKENSS THERE AND NOTHING MORE.... 4 OCTOBER 4-17 paintings. Inspired when he was in el- ementary school by his Uncle George, a Chicago Symphony violinist and amateur landscape painter, Anderson inherited his uncle’s paint box when he was twelve. A stint in the Air Force only delayed him from diving headlong into his true passion for painting. Now his original paintings and limited edition prints belong to collections throughout the US, Canada, and Norway. Jim Ehlinger & Arthur Anderson Opening Reception Friday, October 19 Just in time for autumn, Upstart Crow Fine Art hosts a special exhibition featur- ing two Midwestern artists. Wisconsin painter Arthur Anderson will exhibit orig- inal wildlife paintings and prints, while Dubuque artist Jim Ehlinger will show a series of metal sculptures. An opening re- ception providing guests a chance to meet the artists is scheduled for Friday, October 19, from 5:30 to 8:30 p.m. Upstart Crow Fine Art is located on the first floor of the Platinum Building at 137 Main Street. Dubuque artist Jim Ehlinger has al- ways been a creative individual. He reports that during his thirty-seven year career as a maintenance welder at the John Deere factory in Dubuque, he created “many imaginative tools, vessels, carts and myriad other ac- coutrements for manufacturing,” but his creative impulses also manifested themselves in paintings, drawings, cartoons, and hand-lettered signs for friends and family over the years. His growing interest in art led him to class- es at Clarke and Loras College, where he received a BA in art in 1996. need to remember, imagine and record, Ford Smith and Nigerian by way of At- which gave rise to writing and numbers, lanta painter (Onyeka) Ibe. The gallery Being a welder, Ehlinger’s experience was first expressed through art,” he ex- also represents local artist Tom Metcalf seemed to lead him naturally to metal pressed in an artist statement for the li- whose original paintings sculpture.