SURVIVORS National Organization of Parents Of Murdered Children, Inc. For the families and friends of those who have died by violence. Summer 2016 Dedicated to the Aftermath and Prevention of Murder. Volume 34, Issue 2 Orlando – scene of mass murder – is the site of POMC's victim-survivors KEYNOTER. Patrick conference Knight'sbook,Blessedto Survive:TheThanksgivingDay ORLANDO, Fla. – The 2016 Massacre,describeshisjourney POMC National Conference will fromtragedytotriumphafterbeing feature more than 35 specialized thevictimofoneoftheworstmass- workshops to help victim-survivors. shootingsinSouthFloridahistory. POMC is receiving support to Patrick Knight provide subject matter experts from the Department Of Justice, Office for Victims of Crime on Victims’ Rights in America and Vicarious Trauma. In addition, the Office for Victims of Crime provided survivor scholarships for attendees. We hope to see you all there in Orlando; and, please sign up now for the Conference. The 30th POMC National Conference was held in Orlando, July 21-24, at the Sheraton Lake Buena Vista Resort. (Continued on p. 3)
The National Organization of Parents Of Murdered Children, Inc. (POMC) expresses our heartfelt sympathies to the families of those who lost their lives in the horrific tragedy in Orlando, Florida on Sunday, June 12, 2016, as well as to the families of those who are killed by violence every day in our nation. The impact upon the victims and families, the community of Orlando, and our entire Nation cannot begin to be described. POMC stands with all the survivors–as together–we are strong! Invitations to serve lead into summer SURVIVORS
Executive Director (NIJ), Cold Case attended by several hundred people Working Group. and bowling teams were made up of With DAN LEVEY In the spring of survivors, law enforcement, 2015, NIJ con- prosecutors, members of the public, vened a group of sponsors – and fun was had by all. I hope everyone has had a nice cold case investigation subject mat- The event included DJ, Silent Raffle, spring, and as we roll into summer, ter experts to gather foundational and Ticket Raffle; and I would like I hope it’s not too hot for anyone, information about current cold case to thank all of our sponsors, and if so, just think of us in investigation operations. I was including our Gold Sponsor, the Arizona. I am participating with the invited to be part of the group in Maricopa County Attorney’s Office. Association of Prosecuting Attorneys October and I attended the second Below is a list of our sponsors. and several organizations, including meeting last November in New The National Organization of the National Sheriffs Association, Orleans, La. Our goal was to develop Parents Of Murdered Children, Inc. SEARCH GROUP, Inc., and a cadre outlines and problem statements, and wishes to gratefully acknowledge the of other professionals on the Child to draft recommendations for following primary supporters of this Abuse Prosecution project. integrations into a best practices and event. The project is twofold: (1) to protocols for cold case investigation Gold Sponsor help develop a model curriculum for operations. We hope to meet again Maricopa County Attorney’s Office child abuse prosecutors (including this summer to continue to work on child homicides) and their allied this important topic. Again, I am Silver Sponsor professionals in the field, and (2) to glad POMC was asked to be part of Carstens Family Funds this project. serve as faculty for this curriculum at Bronze Sponsors various conferences. I will be If anyone has any input on the Rabbi John Linder/Edward Linder educating prosecutors and others above topic please feel free to con- Fund about Parents Of Murdered Children tact me directly. Dennis Burke and the work we do. Our National Conference is roll- Patron Sponsors As we all know too well, abuse ing right along and it will be here Arizona Trial Lawyers Association and neglect are a cause of many before we know it. The Conference ESN Direct murders of children. I am glad that Committee has been hard at work to Pat McGroder III, P.C. POMC has been invited to be part of ensure it’s a memorable Conference. Swaback Partners, PLLC this important project. The program I look forward to seeing everyone in Tribute Aviation is funded by the Department of Orlando. Adelman/German PLLC Justice, Office of Juvenile Justice & POMC National recently held Denise Blommel PLLC Delinquency. our 3rd annual “Strike Out Violence” Lane & Nach, P.C. & Roi Properties I also serve on the Department of event which was very successful and Dr. Ben & Mojdeh Bobrow Justice, National Institute of Justice raised over $15,000. The event was Phoenix Police Foundation ! !"#$ %&'&#()" *' +&&,&, $- .&/0 1#23/4 56(737-('8 In the Spring 2016 issue of Trans- examples of how research is converted survivors of homicide, despite the lational Criminology Magazine, POMC’s into criminal justice practice.” significant impact that violence has Executive Director Dan Levey joins The editors describe the article on them.” three colleagues from George Mason as “excellent cases for the need to The article estimates in its opening University’sCenterforEvidence-Based build research and evidence-based paragraph, “…that a single homicide CrimePolicytodetermine“WhatResearch infrastructure for two important costs society approximately $17.25 Is Needed to Help Family Survivors of areas of criminal justice practice. For million in lifetime costs (i.e., direct Homicide.” example, although much research costs associated with the homicide and Translational Criminology Magazine has been focused on homicide and long-term loss of wages and taxes…) promotes a “knowledge exchange to violence, Levey and colleagues dis- and this does not account for the direct shape criminal justice research, cuss how very little knowledge has practice, and policy….by illustrating been generated about family (Continued on p. 3)
Page 2 Summer 2016 SURVIVORS July National Conference Workshops Topics and Presenters) Remembering Our Loved Ones ( Connie Saindon (Continued from p. 1) Survivors’ Mission How Tramatic Loss Affects Connie Saindon Relationships Fathers Grief (Men Only) Bill Jenkins Survivors With Disabilities Mel Nichols Brandy Macaluso Sibling Grief (Sibling Only) Murderabilia/No Notoriety Dawn Terrizzi Homicide Investigations: Andy Kahan Best Practices Victim Rights Richard Hough & Kimberly McCorkle Putting Forgiveness In its Place Rebecca Khalil Carrie Freitag & Peggy Kerouac Sibling Grief (Open to All) Therapy Dogs in Local Chapters Lori King, Susan Kelley Leiker & LGBTQ Murder Laurie Schlossnagle Carrie Freitag & Peggy Kerouac Connie Sheely Vicarious Trauma Between Heaven & Earth: Raising Grieving Children While Barbara Rubel You're Grieving Signs from Heaven Irene Gowins-Sowells Dance Cindy Barg Kathy Hernandez Criminal Justice System: When the Prison Life Victim is a Child Participating with Mike Kullander & Dennis Greenhalgh Dave LaBahn Criminal Justice Agencies Couples Surviving Grief Richard Hough & Kimberly McCorkel DNA and Solving Cold Cases Beckie Miller (Men Only) Daniel Feinberg & Det. Kurt Mehl Putting The Shattered Life Mothers’ Grief (Part 1) Back Together Beckie Miller (Women Only) WeTip Bill Jenkins Susan Aguilar When the Traumatic Loss Visits a Making a Memorial Video Mental Health Professional Preparing for Parole Hearings Rachel Sedlacek Howard Klerk Marvin Bryant How Much Landmine Days Poetry & Journaling Did My Loved One Suffer? Mary Elledge Claudia Place Joshua Stephany M.D. Anger Couples Surviving Grief Ask the Medical Examiner Don Miller (Women only) Claudia Place Joshua Stephany M.D.
Research Is Needed POMC comforter entered in (Continued from p. 2) Topeka’s Jim Ramberg Dog costs to survivors. Estimates on the average number of of the Year Contest family members who survive the loss of a family member TOPEKA, KS – Jasmine, an English cream golden to homicide range from 45,000 up to 240,000 survivors retriever owned by Topekan Carolyn Buono, is a recent each year ….” entry in The Jim Ramberg Dog of the Year contest. Jasmine After looking at what POMC and advocacy groups is a crisis response dog, as well as a therapy animal and a have done to raise public awareness, the article spells out its comfort dog. The pair visit hospitals and nursing homes. purpose: “research on survivors and the impact of They visit school children to talk with them about disaster programs tailored for them has lagged and much more response and preparedness. needs to be known”; for example, “there are no impact Buono and Jasmine also evaluations examining interventions that provide services attend POMC national to homicide survivors.” conferences and seminars and The article concludes, “More research is needed to the Tragedy Assistance understand how to help these survivors and support them Program for Survivors as part throughout their lives as they face this significant loss.” of Extra Mile Ministries. “Spending time with a trained To access the article, Google––“What Research Is Needed dog can bring relief from to Help Family Survivors of Homicide?,” Translational grieving and begin the healing Carolyn Buono and Jasmine Criminology, Spring 2016, 13-15. Ω process,” Buono said. Ω bring comfort to survivors at POMC gatherings.
Summer 2016 Page 3 SURVIVORS
President POMC National is working hard for gram that POMC is opposed to. Board of Trustees you to improve Many thousands of prisoners have With HOWARD KLERK POMC, to help already been released with many protect your rights thousands more scheduled for and to keep release. Among those released and As this is being written, the criminals in prison where they soon to be released are murderers, national organization, staff, and belong and off our streets. For rapists, batterers, child molesters, volunteers were very busy planning example, in one state, convicted and other violent convicts. By the for our 2016 conference in Orlando, murders and others are pushing for a way, when do our loved ones get Fla. Looking back at past ballot initiative to allow for early time off to live the remainder of the conferences, we have discussed how release and a program for life that was so viciously taken from we can make changes to try to community reentry. How do they them by those seeking early release streamline some things such as teddy qualify for this program? If they for good behavior? bear distribution. maintain good behavior and take As a national survivor organiza- certain classes while in prison, that tion, we must remain strong, we Each year new workshops are would show they are trying to being offered along with some new must remain vigilant, and we must improve themselves and therefore oppose those looking to endanger presenters. We certainly hope you should be released early. What is the will find these offerings of interest. our lives by putting criminals back stance of this and other states, cost on our streets and into our A major change this year was the cutting? Effective Leadership Training being neighborhoods. Freedom isn’t free, offered in conjunction with the A program such as this ignores someone had to pay the price for it. Conference. This allowed people to the fact that new bureaucracy may If you feel you would like to get attend the Conference and leadership have to be established, or others deeper involved, consider running training in one visit and realize a enlarged. What about monitoring for the POMC National Board of considerable savings with their travel costs and the expenses incurred if Trustees. Contact our National Off- expenses. they recommit? Also ignored is the ice in Cincinnati for more details. danger they present to society and POMC has entered into an There is strength in numbers. the resulting suffering. Recidivism We wish you a wonderful sum- agreement with Uber, making the rates are high and FBI statistics show trip from the airport to the resort and mer season. Let us never lose site of that many will recommit within three the fact that we are here for our lost back easier and less expensive. If years of release and that their next loved ones. ! you sign up with Uber now you can crime will be more serious than their save more money for yourself and last. God bless all of us. help National at the same time. The Federal Government is also As always, your National Board working on a prisoner release pro- Howard Maine POMC Chapter rededicates Memorial AUGUSTA, ME – Maine POMC Chapter Leader Art Jette (left) comments upon the memorial's purpose. First dedicated in 2014 with 83 names inscribed upon the memorial's rightside,11nameswereaddedon the left side in 2015 and 13 more in June 2016. The monument is shown (p. 5, bottom left half, top photo) as it now appears with the full 107 names. Jette (points to the newly added names (p. 5, bottom left half, bottom photo). !
Page 4 Summer 2016 MURDER WALL . . . . Honoring Their Memories SURVIVORS The names that appear in this issue of with each holding about 20 brass plates SURVIVORS are those that have been submitted inscribed with the name of the victim, along with to the National Organization of POMC, Inc., with the date of birth and the date of death. A full or partial payment before June 10, 2016. donation of $75 is required before a name will be Names after this date will appear in the next inscribed on a plate and permanently mounted issue. on a panel. (See order form on this page.) Not The Wall consists of solid walnut panels only is this donation a tribute to the memory of your loved one, but it is a tribute that will help V3:'/&4 %#&/4:: V3::&( keep alive the memory of those we miss so !"#$#!% & !$#%#!' deeply.
%3$# 5493/ %#9#/#3' The Wall is a powerful statement of the !"#%!#!! & !"#$(#)( violence in our society and of the numbers of loved ones senselessly killed by others. Not %&7W A3//4 OW 5"6/&( only does it give comfort, but also hope, $#$"#(' & '#$!#!( because every name on it cries out silently for awareness, prevention, and justice. Thank you for Your Donation to Maintain the Your Donations Help to Maintain Murder Wall the Wall’s Physical Beauty Timothy Staunton, from Lisa Weaver, from Time and much travel have put stress on the many Denise Coleman Anna & Howard Klerk panels of the Murder Wall...Honoring Their Memories, and scratches, nicks, and dents need to be repaired. Many of the cases that are used to transport the Wall have split or broken, handles have fallen off, and the protective material inside each case needs to be replaced. Currently, the Wall is made up of 32%% panels, display- ing over 3,500 victims‘ names, dates of birth and dates of death.. In order to maintain the beauty of the Wall, POMC con- tinues to seek donations to help make some of the repairs. To help, please use the form below. Donations made in memory/honor of will be in the next issue of Survivors. POMC-Wall Repair (Please Print) Name:______In memory/honor of:______Address:______City, State, Zip:______Amount enclosed: $______Check:____ MO:_____ Visa:____ MC:____ Am. Express:_____ Discover:___ Card Number: ______Sec. Code #: ______Exp. Date:______Return to: POMC, 4960 Ridge Ave., Suite 2, Cincinnati, OH 45209
Summer 2016 Page 5 Lies told about how you should grieve SURVIVORS I’m not a psychologist. I’m a [Adapted from “5 lies you were your beloved are those who cannot writer, so you must know by now that told about grief“ by Alison Nappi, an accept their own mortality. They are I am having a love affair with words.… article from a POMC Chapter people who have never grieved. They I know that they keep me connected to newsletter, but also found elsewhere. either don’t know loss, or they buried everything beautiful in this world, and the next. From 5 lies, we use the second.] themselves with their loved ones. Speaking of your loved one can 1. The Lie: You should be Trust me when I tell you, they have their own mountains yet to climb. keep their presence with you from far over it/him/her by now. across the boundaries of the point 2. The Lie: You should stop Those who would have you silence yourself, choke on the words where life meets death. It is a way to talking about him or her / Stop honor them, and a way to honor your living in the past. that you must speak, are people who do not know their own souls. feelings.Itkeepstheirlovealiveinyou. 3. The Lie: You have to It extends the meaning of their life into move on with your life (right the world in powerful and meaningful now). “Give sorrow words; the ways. It gives them back a voice in a 4. The Lie: You could have world hell-bent on forgetting. prevented this tragedy. grief that does not speak It’s okay to speak of them, to 5. The Lie: Time heals all knits up the o-er wrought them, and even for them when there is wounds. good that can be done by you because they have lived. What better way to The only people heart and bids it break.” 2. The Truth: honoralife,thantoextendthisloveto who cannot bear to hear you speak of ~ Wm. Shakespeare others? !
OREGON CITY, Ore. The POMC Memorial in Mountain View Cemetery had room for 500 names of homicide victims when the Greater Portland Area POMC Chapter dedicated it in 2013, thinking that they had years to add more. Two years later, they want to expand the marble walls to hold 1,500 names for an estimated $100,000. They are halfway there and plan to break ground before Sept. 23, when they will observe The National Day of Remembrance for Murder Victims.
Page 6 Summer 2016 SURVIVORS Listen, listen, and listen even more perceptions that they need to be when working with survivors strong or that they should not show notification. They take their jobs their feelings. It allows the genuine very seriously and will never forget ventilating of emotion that comes the people they notify. naturally for most people. In teaching at colleges, I use the Supporting notifiers know that [Mary Elledge is the Chapter last half of the class time to let silence after a death notification is Leader of the Greater Portland Area attendees break into pairs and take not unusual. This is the time that just POMC Chapter. She teaches turns notifying another team. Some being there and holding a co- death notification at several col- of the students are not able to do victim’s hand or hugging is the most leges and at the Oregon State this. I have seen some leave in tears important thing to do for the Victims Academy.] or not be able to participate in that survivor. Victim-survivors will remem-ber the human touch they Luckily, my husband and I were part of the class. It is not an easy task. Some of the students may have received and words of comfort together when two of the most forever. You do not need a doctorate dedicated detectives we could ever had a bad experience in being notified or live themselves with the in human behavior to be the best hope for drove up in their car, for person to be with a co-victim. my whole life changed.Their walk fear of ever being notified of the and the look on their faces told us death of a loved one. This does not Most important, avoid that they bore the worst news we make them an ineffective person to euphemisms. It is much softer if you ever would hear. Our son, Rob, had work with victims or co-victims of use the person’s name. Do not refer dis-appeared more than five weeks tragic events. It just means it is not to their loved one as the body, earlier. what they can do best. I also would corpse, re-mains, or victim. He or never want to work with or be she is their loved one and they will What they say in books on the notified by a person who could not always have the name they were subject is true. You will never forget express empathy. Empathy is given. It is not necessary to use how, when, and where you were important in every phase of helping platitudes. My son was murdered when notified that your loved one victims of homicide. and I would never say, “I know how was murdered. Sometimes “words can get in you feel.” It is also not wise to say Our family had been fortunate the way.” Giving hugs is part of things such as the following: to have a well-qualified district what we do at POMC. A human • In time, things will get better. attorney, hardworking detectives, touch can be the most important gift • You need to be strong. and supportive help from victims’ we can give another human being. assistance. Sadly, this is not always But, we also must respect people • Sometimes more than one family member is murdered by the case. Some homicide-victim who are not comfortable giving hugs survivors are victimized by their the same person. It could be or having people in their space. The worse. notification; some are shocked, but saying, “a shoulder to cry on,” may Things will get better. feel that the notification was done as not be for everyone, but for many, it • sympathetically as possible. is as important as being able to • He or she will never have to The type of notification we give breath. suffer again. a family will depend on whom we • At least, you have other In the book, I’ll Never Forget children. notify and their circumstances. This Those Words, authors Janice Harris is why it is important that those who Lord and Alan Stewart said, “Saying • He or she is at a better place. bring the news have an idea of the I’m so sorry” may seem like a trivial Again, there are more and more traumatic effect this can have. Death follow-up comment, but it isn’t schools offering classes for victims notifiers can be effective when they trivial. After just relaying and co-victims of crimes. It is im- understand that. devastating information, expressing portant in training people that they It is not easy to bring such news. an emotional reaction, is a welcome get the most up-to-date information Most people who do take it very change from the hard facts. It tells about the best practices in working seriously. They put themselves in a the family that the notifiers are with those who have been position that can even make them warm, caring individuals. victimized. As co-victims, we can feel vulnerable. It is not uncommon Furthermore, it subtly invites family offer advice and suggestions that can for them to need understanding members to react emotionally as help others. Ω people to talk to after making a well. It can cut through false
Summer 2016 Page 7 Parole Block Program SURVIVORS
Bev Parole Block With WARNOCK Petitions
Parole BlockTM is a program of the TM Parole Hearing first degree murder and September 2016 wassentencedtolifeinprison National Organization of with mercy. He will have RE: William served only 25 years when he Parents Of Murdered Children, Inc. Samuel Scythes is considered for parole. . ID# 17782 Support for the Parole Block Program: On Sept. 18, 1991, Will- To protest, write to: iam Scythes brutally West Virginia Parole murdered his wife, Sandra Board Convicted murderers 1356 Hansford Street Suite B Jane Scythes, while she was Charleston, WV 25301 have been denied sleep-ing. He tied her up, ------parole through POMC''s strangled her, and deposited Parole Hearing 1572 Parole Block Program her body in the nearby woods. March 8, 2017 as conducted by the Two days later, he turned himself in to the authorities. RE: Samuel POMC National Office and POMC Christopher Jones Scythes was convicted of Chapters. . ID# 212953 On Febr. 6, 2003, RESULTS SINCE THE SPRING 2016 SURVIVORS Samuel Christopher Jones, 21, had been caring for NATIONAL ------OFFICE Cameron D’Anthony GREATER HOUSTON!TX" CHAPTER Norris, age 3, while his Paroles Denied PORTLAND !OR" Bret Arbuckle CHAPTER mother was at work. Jones Paroles Denied beat Cameron on multiple Edward Ball Paroles Denied Joe Roidriguez Barack Barnum occasions with his hand and Peggy Jean Kenner a slipper, and also struck Daniel Corralez Brandon Raymond Lee Damien Torres Cameron’s head against a Edward Cronell ------Dayton Leroy Rogers- wall. Cameron was Rodney Whipple [Sent back to death row] ALBANY (NY" transported to the hospital Adrian Williams CHAPTER Tony Wik and placed on life support I.G. Wimbush Parole Denied Dale Ryan Yates and died the following Released ------Matthew Solomon morning. David Burton Cain ORANGE COUNTY ------Jones pled guilty to sec- William L. Kates CA CHAPTER ! " SANANTONIO ond degree murder and was Deceased in Prison Parole Denied !TX" CHAPTER sentenced to 20 years. He Jack Warren Davis Michael Dubov will have served only 13 ------Paroles Denied years when he is considered ------Mardi Elaine Swartz for parole. CENTRAL SACRAMENTO !CA" Brian Amano ARKANSAS CHAPTER CHAPTER William Mixo To protest write to: Paroles Denied Parole Denied ------Minnesota Department of Cheryl Brewer Mike Morgantie Corrections Cody Chism Attention: Parole Board Walter Haynes Parole is society's gamble 1450 Energy Park Drive D Christopher Jones that the prisoner has changed. Suite 200 Justin Thabit St. Paul, MN 55108 Parole Block is a victim-survivor's belief ------Paroled that the odds are mistaken. (Continued on p. 9) Michael Lowe
Page 8 Summer 2016 Parole Block Petitions SURVIVORS my family. (Continued from p. 8 the week before and RE: William Kates Sincerely, Melinda was home. ID#: 01017013 Parole Hearing Edward Cronell was Bev, Anna Hixon August 10, 2016 convicted of murder and My name is Anna was sentenced to two life Hixon, and you recently (Continued on p. 16) RE: Edward terms plus 30 years, but helped me with my dear ------Cronell eligible for parole after 20 friend, Julie Gulledge, get years. He will have served a parole block petition. My February 5, 2016 ID#: 210762 only 22 years when he will mother, Nancy Hixon- On Jan. 23, 1990 be considered for parole. Broadaway, was murdered Dear friends! July 4, 2005. At the Melinda Snyder (22) was To protest, write to: Thank you all so raped and murdered by offender William Kates's much again!!! Your letters, Edward Cronell (23), who SC Dept of Probation, April 14, 2016 parole emails, etc. helped! Shad was the realtor for the Parole & Pardon Services hearing, the parole board Hocutt, the “muscle” in house in which Melinda decided to release him on the homicide of our son, rented a room. Melinda PO Box 50666 July 18, 2019. Upon Marty, was denied parole release, he will serve the had just finished college Columbia, SC 29250 again. Thanks to all of you and was a teacher’s one-year remain-ing of his participating. assistant. Cronell broke in ------sentence under parole supervision. God bless, take care! the house through the Parole Hearing lockbox on the front door. April 14, 2016 I thank you for all that He had shown the house you have done for me and Bill & Shirl
Siblings advise homicide-victim survivors coping skill; . •Journal – putting your feelings By Amanda Harris •Surround themselves by in writing is very helpful; [Sibling Coordinator, Amanda those who are supportive–get toxic friends and people out of your •If their sibling is buried in Harris, herself a homicide-victim another state, put flowers on a survivor with Valley of the Sun POMC life; Chapter, shared some things other •Tend to their own needs, not stranger’s grave at cemetery; siblings have said that helped them.] just other family mem-bers (take •Make a donation in their Siblings to sibling-survivors: care of yourself first in order to help sibling’s name on special dates others); (i.e., anniversaries, birthdays) •Acknowledge they will never be •Make a plan for your life; the same and accept their new normal; •Hobbies can be a good (Continued on p. 19) Help Keep Murderers Behind Bars Write letters protesting the parole of those convicted murderers listed in each issue of the SURVIVORS newsletter. Petitions can also be downloaded from POMC’s website at www.pomc.org. • Contact National POMC if your loved one‘s murderer is going to be considered for early release or parole. • Contact National POMC to be placed on the list of those willing to circulate monthly petitions. • Support the program by sending your tax-deductible donation.
Summer 2016 Page 9 SURVIVORS COLDCASECORNER departments. Many state trooper cold case investigative units also provide What Are Cold Case Investigations? support to police and sheriff’s departments at the local level. Cold cases refer to crimes that vary widely, according to location. Investigators within a cold case have gone unsolved for years and that For example, in 2008, Chicago man- unit must establish a number of have no active leads that investigators aged to solve just 35 percent of its mur- partnerships and locate new and viable can pursue. According to a Scripps ders, while in San Diego, 94 percent of leads, which may be a difficult all murder cases were solved. The Howard News Service study of the process. Therefore, the most FBI Uniform Crime Report, nearly national clearance rate has also fallen, experienced investigators within a 185,000 homicide/manslaughter cases from around 90 percent in the 1960s to went unsolved during the 28-year well below 65 percent in recent years. police depart-ment usually work cold period between 1980 and 2008. That’s case investigations. an average of nearly 6,000 unsolved To combat the problem of un- Cold case unit investigators also mur-der cases every year in the United solved homicides, many of the na- serve as advocates for victims and States—despite advances in every- tion’s larger police departments have bring peace to the loved ones of an thing from online investigative tech- implemented cold case units that are individual who was killed or is niques to forensic science. staffed with the most highly skilled missing. ! investigators. Cold case units are now Clearance rates for homicides prevalent among state and city police [Adapted from DetectiveEDU.org web page.] Questions help investigators decide when to put
homicide cases on ice for issuing? Yes ___ No ___ If “Yes,” what was their opinion? ______1. Was this case classified as a homicide or sexual assault ______per Arizona Revised Statute (A.R.S.) definition at the time of incident? 9. Was all the evidence related to this case reviewed? Yes ___ No ___ Yes ___ No ___ If not, how was this case classified?______By what Investigator ______By what Crime Lab DNA Analyst ______2. If a homicide, was the victim’s body located? 10. Is the evidence viable for current scientific Yes ___ No ___ examination standards? Yes ___ No ___ 3. If a sexual assault, was a rape kit collected? Yes ___ No ___ By what DNA Analyst ______4. Were there witnesses to the homicide/sexual assault? 11. Is the evidence viable for current prosecution Yes ___ No ___ standards? Yes ___ No ___ Are the witnesses still available? By what Investigator or Prosecutor ______Ye s ___ No___ 12. After round table review, is this a workable “cold” 5. Is the victim of the sexual assault available and willing case? Yes ___ No ___ to testify? Yes ___ No ___ Assigned Investigator ______6. Is there evidence related to the homicide/sexual assault Date ______still available? Yes ___ No ___ DNA Analyst ______7. Was a Crime Laboratory analysis performed? Date ______Yes ___ No ___ Prosecutor (If applicable) ______If “Yes,” was any type of DNA results obtained? Date Yes ___ No ______8. Was this case presented to the County Attorney’s Office Developed by the Arizona Department of Public Safety
(This questionnaire is taken from Serving Survivors of Homicide Victims During Cold Case Investigations, Appendix B. Cold Case Solvability Questionnaire, 43. Prepared by the National Sheriffs’ Association, Justice Solutions, and the National Organization of Parents Of Murdered Children, Inc., 2011.)
Page 10 Summer 2016 SURVIVORS COLD CASE CASES: SURVIVORS COPE “Dr. Phil Show” at the time it became homeless and lost every- happened. I was a basket case. thing we had. It was a role reversal. Finally, I have closure. I knew it I had a breakdown and got into would take a long time. I had no drugs and prostitution. idea how long. I just thank God it is (Mary Elledge is the Chapter Leader It’s been 12 years, but my PTSD finally over. of the Greater Portland Area POMC says it was yesterday. I have turned I now live in Oregon with my Chapter. She introduces several survi- my life around, thanks to Jesus. daughter, Jacqueline, who struggles vors of homicide-victims whose loved with drug addiction. I am working ones' murderers are still on the loose. My daughter’s killer, Neal Falls, full time and I have a car. I go to They tell of their suffering and difficult was killed a few months ago by a ways of enduring.) working girl he stalked from Oregon church on Saturdays at the Seventh to West Virginia on a Craig’s List Day Adventist Church, and once Unsolved cases prevent site. He was a serial killer, having again, life is good. Ω families from getting to a killed a dozen girls in four states. He [MARY: I was more than had a list of others to kill next. But thrilled when I received Pamela “new normal” while trying to strangle his last vic- Brewer's call, saying that her (Part 2) tim, she managed to shoot Falls with daughter’s murder had been solved. his own gun. Thanks to her, this It truly made a difference in her life. After 12 years, Jodi madness has stopped. and healing. She feels that she has The case made “America’s Most now gotten to a “new normal.” We Marie Brewer’s case was Wanted.” I was asked to go on the all celebrate her new life now.] solved By Pamela Brewer Vicky Johnson’s case finally is solved, Our daughter Jodi Marie Brewer the murderer is caught ing. It either makes you or breaks you. was born in Seattle, Wash., Nov. 26, You only have two choices. [MARY: Vicky Johnson’s son 1983. When she was two, we moved I journaled through the years and to Las Vegas. Her father, James, and and his girlfriend, Donna Ferguson, were murdered on July 17, 1992. wrote Hurled into Darkness. Having I worked in the casino industry. Life Eight years later, the murderer–a my case solved also helped me not was good. Her sister Jacqueline was serial killer–was apprehended and have to deal with “not knowing and born in 1990. Shortly thereafter, Jim sentenced to life. Vicky traveled a getting justice for my son,” as I had was diagnosed with multiple painful road after the case was the first years after Todd was mur- sclerosis. We had our last family solved. She wrote a book, Hurled dered. I could concentrate on writing into Darkness, to help others heal vacation in Disneyland. Jodi was 18. my book to show others that you can Jacque-line was 12. and to offer hope to other victim- survivors. You can find the book on find hope again and mend. It takes a Jodi enrolled in beauty college. Amazon.com under Hurled into long time. The darkness has much to She lost her grant after her first Darkness, by Victoria Johnson. I teach us. When you write things semester, and at the age of 18, she urge co-victims to read it. down, it is also a way of releasing fell into prostitution. I didn’t want your pain. Ω her on the streets, so we got an apart- Journey through “not ment together. Two weeks later, her knowing” [MARY: In her book, Vicky does not hold back on the pain co- torso was found in a garbage bag on By Vicky Johnson victims go through. There will be a the side of the freeway in San In the beginning, I wanted some- TV show about the murder of her Bernardino, Cal. son, Todd Rudiger, and his friend, one to shoot me with a gun. I wanted Donna Jean Ferguson. Donna’s My life became a downward out of life. But God was there for me spiral. It took six months to get her sister, Deloni is also in the TV when it all came down on me. The movie. It should be shown in April remains back because they had to do grief and the rage were overwhelm- or May.] DNA testing. I had to keep working. There was no closure and Jim was terminally ill. Jacqueline attempted "My life didn't end that night, It began. My identity, suicide a week before her father mission, and goals have changed forever. Much of my died. She was placed in foster care. I time is now spent getting to know this new person, and lost my union job of 17 years. To no avail, I begged to go to rehab. I learning to work with him." ---Bill Jenkins
Summer 2016 Page 11 CONTACTPERSONS/ SURVIVORS CHAPTERLEADERSCORNER Chapter Donations (from Annual Report) We thank the Sherry following new Valley of the Sun Central Illinois With NOLAN volunteers for the valuable services Arizona Maine that they will provide to other survivors on behalf of POMC, Inc. If you would like more information about Contra Costa Minnesota Hope County/East Bay our volunteer opportunities, please contact Sherry Queens New York Nolan, National Volunteer Coordinator, at: California Central Ohio Miami Dade 888-818-7662, or [email protected] Greater Milwaukee Southwest Florida Wisconsin '#3 ;"% !"# U#$#% VW#'/&.MAX 96:; ;"% <4-8()8 KLMGNLKGKNOK 4)66 KLMGPPMGMQLR &$*) 6-+4 <(4,-3*/ *31 <4-5(,,.-3*/ 4(<+8*8.-3,> )*'A%N#7%AG$*.M#/B%-41.*B *31 5-//-7 9&:; <-/.).(,B C2(,( A+.1(/.3(, 7.// ------*< ,-).*/ 3(87-4E,> *31 7(=F E'+ S),'+1 @)('2' ,.8(, 824-+A2 G.E.<(1.*> H*)(=--E> H/.)E4> PQOGNOTGUQRM 4)66 4%
Page 12 Summer 2016 SURVIVORS POMC hosts, participates, in local National Crime Victims’ community gatherings and ceremonies Rights Week: Friends and Family of Murder Victims criminals who brutally victimized a April 10 through April 16, 2016 (FFMV) heard words of praise from 22-year-old mother on Christmas District Attorney Michael Ramos for Day, 2012. At 7 p.m., the Delaware “Serving Victims. Building her support of victim-survivors. Co., Pa. POMC Chapter held a Trust. Restoring Hope.” Linda Miers –– the new Chapter candlelight vigil in Courtroom One of Leader of The Inland Empire POMC the Delaware County Courthouse. Every year in April, the Office for Chapter––in 11 years lost two LITTLE ROCK, AR, April 14–– Victims of Crime helps lead daughters to murder in San The Central Arkansas POMC Chapter communities throughout the Bernardino. Her younger daughter joined the Vigil For Survivors Of country in their annual Melanie was killed during a 2005 Crime, which included victims and observances of National Crime drive-by shooting, and her oldest survivors from different communities, Victims’ Rights Week (NCVRW). daughter Michelle was attacked and like sexual assault, LGBTQ, disabled, murdered inside her apartment in July Latino, African America, homicide- AUGUSTA, ME, April 10—The 2014. victim survivors, and the Arkansas Maine POMC Chapter hosted its 12th A 20-years victim-survivor who Coalition Against Sexual Assault. ! Annual National Crime Victims’ works with both FFMV and POMC KANSAS CITY, MO, April 15— Rights Week celebration at the said, “I didn’t realize how much The Kansas City Area Wide POMC Calumet Club. After lunch, speakers people care about survivors.” ! Chapter and the Kansas City from the Maine State Police and the MEDIA, DELAWARE CO., PA, Mounted Patrol led a solidarity walk Maine State Crime Lab talked about April 13—The District Attorney’s for participants in the local observance how advances in the way victims of Office and members of DelawareCo.’s of National Crime Victims’ Rights crime are treated result in better Victims Policy Funding Board Week. The U.S. Attorney’s Office outcomes for prosecutors and recognized victim advocates whose presented a memorial award to the survivors. ! mission is to help others in need and SCAN Clinic at Children’s Mercy SAN BERNADINO, CA, April 11 – who have provided extraordinary care Hospital in memory of two young Hundreds–from crime victims’ family and treatment for crime victims. women who were fatal victims of tragic crimes. ! members, city officials, and law en- U.S. Sen. Pat Toomey was forcement––observed National Crime recognized for his efforts to ensure the DETROIT, MICH., April 17— Victims’ Rights Week at the San disbursement of federal funds to Oakland Co. Prosecutor Jessica Bernardino County Government victims of crime, and Upper Darby Cooper named three advocacy groups Center. Township Police Det. Raymond —HAVEN, Parents Of Murdered Rose Madsen, long-time leader of Blohm was honored for jailing three Children, and Common Ground—in her annual “Victims’ Service Distinction Awards” given during 96:; ;OE9!FP2 ;F=FUPE!@5d aK _FEP2 National Crime Victims’ Rights Week. 6P :6PF 6^ 6^^FP@5d 20996P! !6 One of her awards went to Oakland 20PQ@Q6P2 6^ O6:@;@DF?Q@;!@:2 Co. Sheriff Michael Bouchard as the state’s outstanding sheriff of 2016. ! ;OE9!FP 5E:F 2!E!F ^6P:FD _FEP WARREN, OH, April 18––The 9#'-')&4% 2*&/" U%A ;%4-+*$'-% HHCHLC`H aI Trumbull Co. POMC Chapter O*&)/*' !#b%) HHCHZC`H aI organized a candlelight vigil at the :#/$* D#/$*-/ :-."-7%' KHCK`C`J ac Methodist Church for the family d$#%/#$ 9*$/4%'( E$#% 6$#7*' KcCJKC`J 1ac members of murder victims as part of E4N%'A 5#3 _*$M HHCKJC`J ac their Crime Victims Week. ! :-%B-?D%(# ;*1 ^4*$-(% KcCHJC`a aa BONNE TERRE, MO, April 23— ;*4*1 ^$*'/ P%'7# ;*4*$%(* KZCJ[C`a aa Eastern Reception, Diagnostic and 2/1 =*&-) E$#% R-(# @44-'*-)C:-))*&$- KaCHIC`I aH Correctional Center in Bonne Terre :-''#)*/% O*<# :-''#)*/% HKCHIC`I aH held its Annual Crime Victims Q%44#A *+ /"# 2&' E$-8*'% KHCHcC`L 1aK (Continued on p. 15)
Summer 2016 Page 13 SURVIVORS SURVIVORSCONGRATULATES DURHAM, NC, May 19—At its Diane Jones and Mina Hampton Service Awards Ceremony, the Durham Police Department conferred Community Service Medals upon Mina Hampton and Diane Jones for the work they have done in the Durham communities as Co-Chap- ter Leaders of the Durham POMC Chap- ter. ! For 23 years, POMC has served as a liaison between the Durham Police Department and family members of homicide victims. POMC members have coun-seled hundreds of survivors locally and throughout the state on how to cope with the unique type of grief. They have been instrumental in expanding services provided to victims’ families and they provide resources during monthly meetings. Mina Hampton and Diane Jones have donated significant time and effort to POMC. They provide a much- D-%'# e*'#) %'( :-'% O%B
Dawn Terrizzi Charlotte and Robert Hullinger DELRAY BEACH, FL, April 29— Dawn Terrizzi, Administrative CINCINNATI, OH, April 13–– Assistant of the Delray Police The 2016 National Crime Depart-ment, was chosen as Victims' Rights Week Employee of the Year by the non- (NCVRW) event in Hamilton profit organization–Delray Citizens County. The 2016 Hamilton for Delray Police (DCDP). A County (OH) NCVRW Award monetary prize was included in the to Mr. and Mrs. Robert award. This annual award is Hullinger, founders of presented during the annual D%3' !#$$-88- POMC. Three months after Employee Awards Banquet. their 19-year-old daughter, Lisa (1958-78), died from her Terrizzi is a POMC Contact Person, member of wounds, the first Parents the Miami-Dade POMC Chapter, and leader of a Of Murdered Children group !"# O&44-'7#$) %..#
“But then, I have another daughter, so New Chapter Leader survives two daughters' killings I need to care.” REDLANDS, Cal. ––In after Michelle’s death, She is a eucharistic minister at San November2005,LindaMiers’ seeking relief from painful Bernardino’s Our Lady of the Rosary 16-year-old daughter, memories and the city’s social Cathedral, where she also helps feed Melanie, was killed in a drive- problems. She now raises her needy and homeless people once a by shooting outside a party in 14-year-old daughter, Natalie, month. her hometown of San in nearby Redlands. Bernardino, Cal. Miers recently took over as Chapter Every day is a struggle to Leader of the Inland Empire POMC overcome the lingering grief Nine years later, Melanie’s =-'(% :-#$) Chapter. She wants to help other 26-year-old sister, Michelle, from the loss of her first two people who have lost children to was stabbed to death in the city, daughters. violence. ! leaving behind two young children. “You get to the point where you Miers left San Bernardino shortly say, ‘I just don’t care,’” Miers said. [Adapted from Huffpost Politics.]
Page 14 Summer 2016 SURVIVORS In Loving Memory Of: The difference between the living and the dead is the difference Martha Bess Young, from between the remembered and the forgotten. Faye Young Lest We Forget! Christina Leah Zane, from Suzanne Zane Timothy Bradley II, from Louis Innucci, from Dr. Laitate Osansade, Timothy Bradley Rosalind & Nunzio Innucci MD, Leonard Vicky Geiger, Angela Amanda Jarrod Chrisman, from Daniel Klagsburn, from IN HONOR OF… Suzie & Rodney Chrisman Herbert Klagsburn Reyes, from Janet Reyes Dwayne Chubb, from Steven Lee Lairson, from Jim Roback, from Nancy Ruhe-Munch, Dorothy & Albert Lester Hammock Joan Roback from Jean & John Lewis Elena Semander, from Daniel Everbeck, from Howard Levey, from Dan Levey Harriet & John Semander Bonnie & Gary Everbeck DONATIONS Rodney “Kemmie” Mary Gelinas, from Scott Jonathan Lewis, from Jean & John Lewis Smith, from Appriss Inc. Laura Hastings and Torita Davenport Robert Plant Katherine Manekas, from Jeff Spurgin, from Phillip Dumas Eric Gelman, from Eugenia & Peter Manekas Helen & Daniel Spurgin Terrie Jacoby Lynn & Richard Gelman Kelly Minckler Horn, from Dorothy Ronk Willie Tafoya, from Nicole Luscombe Aaron Goldman, from Flora Tafoya Honore & Thomas Jennifer Mullin, from Melissa Thoma, from Rose Minor McIlhattan John Mullin Jr. Terri Lynn Nadeau, from Dorothy & Frank Thoma Te’kia Parks Charles Hall II, from Pat & Allen Walker Harold Leon Walter, Jr., Ann & Billy Hall Prosecutors Bar Jeanne Nicarico, from from Kathern & Harold Association, Wheaton, Stuart Hess, from Thomas & Patricia Waters Illinois Lois & Dick Hess Nicarico Lisa Weaver, from Dena Railsback James Joseph “Jay” Hitt, Shannon & Alexandra Anna & Howard Klerk from Debbie Hitt Jordan Nolan Broe, from Jack Stewart Wyman, Wilbur Schmidt Lance Hoskins, from L.C. & Sharon Nolan from Dorothy Scott United Way of Lelia Hoskins Wyman Central Indiana
POMC hosts, participates, in local community ceremonies (Continued from p. 13) "#$%, CA, May 22—The Greater Orange County Chapter of POMC presented its 24th annual Candlelight Vigil at 6 Ceremony Tuesday afternoon in observance of National p.m. in Memory Garden Memorial Park, Brea. Among the Crime Victims’ Rights Week. I.A.C. (Institutional speakers was Paul Paulsen, whose sister Debbie was a victim Activities Coordinator) and Restorative Justice of the mass killing at Cal State Fullerton in 1976. He talked Coordinator Beth Gammon said, “ERDCC offers many about marking the 40th year anniversary of that tragedy. ways to give back to the community, in 2014 and 2015, the !&&'''''''''''''''''''''''''''''&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&'' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ERDCC donated $12,498 just in cash donations. All the money raised went to local charities in the area.” PINE BLUFF, AR, March 27––Chapter Leader Melinda Chapter Leader Annette Scrum Zezoff of the Crowder and Victim Advocate Amy Stiver of the Central St. Louis Area Wide POMC Chapter spoke Arkansas Chapter took part in “Dealing with Violence” at a during the ceremony. She touched on what the candle lighting program in memory of two murder victims organization does and how it helps the victims. killed 19 years ago. Their deaths led to the creation of a The I.A.C. presented checks to POMC, Respect for Life Campaign. Also taking part were Kids Smart, and the SEMO Violence representatives of the Arkansas Crime Victims and the OK Council. Each one of these organizations Program at Little Rock, which provides positive guidance gives back to the community one way or E''#//# 2.$&B and support to African-American males. The mission of the another. A representative from each f#8*++ campaign is to promote healing for families traumatized by organization spoke during the ceremony. gun violence or domestic violence. !
Summer 2016 Page 15 What research is needed to help SURVIVORS family survivors of homicide? THOMAS M. McPHEE (1950-2016), million in lifetime costs (i.e., direct In the Spring 2016 issue of died July 2, 2016 in Translational Criminology costs associated with the homicide and Norwood, Pa. Magazine, POMC’s Executive long-term loss of wages and taxes…) Director Dan Levey joins three and this does not account for the direct Survived by his wife, colleagues from George Mason costs to survivors. Estimates on the Jane; daughter, University’s Center for Evidence- average number of family members Nicole; two Based Crime Policy to determine, who survive the loss of a family stepchildren; 15 “What Research Is Needed to Help member to homicide range from 45,000 grandchildren; and Family Survivors of Homicide.” up to 240,000 survivors each year ….” sister, Nancy Thomas M. Translational Criminology After looking at what POMC and McPhee Galbraith. The Magazine promotes a “knowledge advocacy groups have done to raise McPhee's daughter, exchange to shape criminal justice public awareness to the needs of Ste-phanie McPhee-Moser, was research, practice, and policy…by homicide-victim survivors, the article murdered Sept. 10, 2001. The following [giving] exam-ples of how research is spells out its purpose: “research on converted into criminal justice survivors and the impact of programs years found Thomas and Jane active in practice.” tailored for them has lagged and much the Delaware County POMC Chapter. The editors describe the article as more needs to be known”; for exam- During those years, he served as a “excellent cases for the need to build ple, “there are no impact evaluations Contact Person in Pennsylvania. He research and evidence-based examining interventions that provide created the Conference Memorial Video infrastructure for two important areas services to homicide survivors.” for the 2010 National POMC of criminal justice practice. For The article concludes, “More Conference. It was hosted by the example, although much research has research is needed to understand how to Delaware County Chapter. His wife, been focused on homicide and help these survivors and support them Jane, is the current Chapter Leader. violence, Levey and colleagues discuss throughout their lives as they face this how very little knowledge has been significant loss.” St. Louis Chapter Leader generated about family survivors of Mata Weber lays down homicide, despite the significant To access the article, Google impact that violence has on them.” ––“What Research Is Needed to Help the reins of leadership Family Survivors of Homicide?,” The article estimates in its opening Mata Weber’s daughter, Karen paragraph, “…that a single homicide Translational Criminology, Spring Weber Hock, was bludgeoned and costs society approximately $17.25 2016, 13-15. Ω drowned in 1982. Her mother, Mata Weber, has since been a member of the St. Louis Area Wide POMC Chapter.” Parole Block Petitions As a longtime (Continued from p. 9) Chapter Leader, she has attending a party there. People testified before legislative standing outside said she was not Parole Hearing: committees. And, along there, even though she was. Kates April 14, 2016 with other Chapter became angry, drove a short dis- members, Weber was Booneville Correctional Facility tance, then fired several shots from invited to visit inmates, Mata Weber Booneville, Missouri his car before fleeing. At least one working with offenders in bullet struck Nancy and she died on the “Impact of Crime on Victim Classes” the patio. toincreasetheirsensitivitytowardvictims RE: William Kates “to prevent further victimization.” She CDC#: 01017013 Kates was convicted of second told them: “Something... good has to On July 4, 2005, William Kates degree murder, armed criminal come out of what a horrible thing it was. shot and killed Nancy Hixon- action, and unlawful use of a wea- Nobody asked me if I wanted to lose my Broadaway, 56, while she was sit- pon. He was sentenced to 15 years daughter.” ting on her patio enjoying a 4th of in prison. If paroled, he would have Now, in ill health, she no longer leads July celebration. Kates drove by served only 10 years and 5 months. the Chapter and lives with one of her Nancy’s house around 11 pm and daughters. Chapter leaders now are asked for his girlfriend, who was RELEASED Ω assessing their leadership plans. Ω
Page 16 Summer 2016 Goodbye to Goodbye SURVIVORS Goodbye? Why would I want saying goodbye rob you of the Darcie to say goodbye? I wasn’t through memories of what you did get to saying hello! Thirty-four years say and how you lived your lives By SIMS ago, I did get to say goodbye. I together? Why let the grief of knew the end of our son’s life was not saying goodbye steal away the [Long a friend, speaker, and workshop leader at approaching and I got the chance joy of knowing your loved one was POMC conferences, Darcie Sims died in February 2014. Her infant son's death taught her about to give one last hug and say one in your life and still is a thread in bereavement, and that led her to becoming an last sentence. I got the chance to your fabric to be woven forever international grief counselor. All homicide-victim say goodbye and I didn’t take it. around your heart? survivors have benefitted from her wise counsel.] In the last moments of my son’s Goodbye? I’d rather live my “I didn’t get to say goodbye.” As life, and years later, of my life so that my last words are, “I a therapist, I have listened to parents’ lives, I did not say love you.” We never know when an thousands of bereaved people goodbye. ordinary day will turn into a day lament about the last words they With the very last breath of that gets marked down in the spoke to their loved ones. So many my son’s life, I simply said, “I love family history as a not-so-ordinary of them have wept in grief over not you.” I was able to be with my day. But all of us can live our lives saying goodbye. So much grief has mom in her final hours, and I did so we can leave with few regrets. been spent on not saying a farewell; not say goodbye. I said, “I love Do not let the events of the past so much additional hurt has been you.” And although I was not with few years rob you of your hope, felt because someone did not get my dad when he died, the last your passion, your joy in living. to say goodbye. words I shared with him as I left Moments, just moments, one after Sermons have been preached, his home on what was to be his another, each special and sacred books and poetry written about last night, I kissed him and said, in its own way, each waiting to be saying goodbye. Pictures have been “I love you.” If you did not get to etched forever on our memories. painted, tears caught in bronze and say goodbye, let go of the hurt Long ago, I learned that any sculpted arms left empty in the you are experiencing. You moment can be the last one, so I lament of goodbye. Almost no one would not have no longer waste too many of my believes there might be a reason to said moments. Oh yes, there are days say goodbye, now—today! Most when I simply plod through the days are simple, ordinary ones and We each need to take moments, not even aware of their there seems no special reason to passing. It often takes a say goodbye. Hardly anyone knows advantage of the moments cataclysmic event to shake me out it will be the last day or the last we have and spend them of my reverie and reawaken me to time. wisely. Spend them saying, the specialness of each moment. Why do we spend so much time We each need to take and grief over not saying goodbye? “I love you,” instead of advantage of the moments we Why do we wash away the words wishing you had said goodbye. have and spend them wisely. we did get to say over a lifetime of Spend them saying, “I love you,” loving someone with the single it, even if you had had the instead of wishing you had said lament, “I didn’t get to say good- chance! You would have said, “I goodbye. Make a commitment to bye”? Why are those words so love you.” never let another moment pass important that the lack of them Goodbye is simply too final; without being aware of its creates a lifetime of additional too harsh, too forever. Surely passing. hurt and pain? your loved one knew you loved him. Goodbye has always been a Ceremonies are created and Surely your loved one knew you part of my life because I grew up designed for the bereaved to say cared. And even if you don’t military, married military, and goodbye. We stand in line for hours believe they knew, you can do gave birth to military. My address to express our sympathies to the something about that right now. changes more often than the bereaved and to say “good-bye” to Go outside, find your special star, weather. But I gave up saying the deceased. Even if we have not and with all your might, whisper, goodbye long ago when I realized seen the deceased in years, it speak or yell out loud, “I LOVE that “I love you” lasts far longer seems especially important to come YOU!” Trust me, the universe is and feels so much better. at the time of death to say good- listening, and your words of love Goodbye? I’m not through saying, bye. Funeral directors, mental will travel far to reach the heart “Hello,” and, “I love you!” ! health professionals, and most of of those no longer within hugs’ the world seems to believe that it reach. I guess you could yell good- [Reprinted from is necessary to say goodbye in bye, too, if you really want to...but Grief Digest Magazine, order to begin the healing process. why? Why let the grief of not Vol. 8, Issue 1, July 2010.]
Summer 2016 Page 17 Mother of murdered son–registered as SURVIVORS a sex offender–endures years of grief Sex registries pose this danger “It is impossible to make sense of any of this. Once, William said that he In April of 2006, a young man from Nova wanted to be known as a person who Scotia, Canada, shot and killed two convicted sex shook everyone’s hand and smiled at offenders living in Maine whose information he had everyone he met. He was not a violent found on the state’s internet registry. The assailant person, but he was killed because shot himself as police attempted to capture him. someone thought he was.” One of the victims was William Elliot, 19, The story of William's murder convicted of having consensual sex with his 15- was spread by media coverage, Shirley Turner and friend, year-old girlfriend. His mother, Shirley Turner, including The Boston Globe, two Paul, grieve upon hearing (local, 5 & 7) TV channels, "60 said, “Without the registry, he would still be alive that her son, Wm. Elliott, 24, was murdered. Minutes," and Hualdo. Foreign today. I would still have him.” She spoke to Human coverage included England, where the Rights Watch about the crime. BBC showed Queen Elizabeth an “William had a girlfriend. He was 19 and she was 15 [three weeks from account of the crime. being 16, the age of consent in Maine]. Her parents found out, and William was Someone unknown to Turner sent convicted of statutory rape. William was in prison for about two years. her a copy of SURVIVORS, the POMC newsletter. She has been getting it “William did okay adjusting to life after prison. He was always a quiet and ever since. On the tenth anniversary of really sweet person, and he mostly kept to himself. He didn’t really have any William's death, she contacted Dan neighbors, because his trailer was in the woods. He liked it, it was quiet. William Levey, using the phone number found was working in construction. in the newsletter. As this article goes “One day, I came home from work, and my husband told me to sit down. He to press, she is preparing to move and will contact the Maine POMC told me that William had been killed that morning. I knew something had Chapter. Ω happened to my son because I woke up from sleep with a start." [Adapted from an interview with Shirley “The murderer came to William’s home after finding out about him on Turner and material from No Easy Answers: Maine’s sex offender registry. He thought William was a pedophile. The man Sex Offender Laws in the US.] shot William in the face. William was found in his doorstep, so police think the man shot him when William opened the door.
Begay explained that when she New Kentucky Chapter in Berea hears a parent tell their story, she could sympathize, feel and relive her own The National Organization of from the Richmond, Ky. area to grief. Parents Of Murdered Children now Washington, D.C. However, back in “It is such a traumatic thing,” said has a Berea chapter, the first in Corinth, Ky., Ruben was murdered in Begay. “I wouldn’t wish it on my Kentucky, thanks to Madison County 2010, and she brought the children worst enemy. It’s one of the things you resident Sonya Begay. back to raise them in Madison are never prepared for. Any type of The new Chapter County. This place was their death is tragic, but with homicide, you currently has three board original home. have to go through identifying your members, including a doctor Begay added that at the child’s body, the court, and often and members from two time her middle son relocated seeing the person that shot your son or families who are homicide- to assist his mother. daughter. victim survivors. Begay is one Sonow, sixyearsfrom the The Berea Chapter of POMC of those family members. Sonya Begay tragedy, Begay wants to help meets the third Monday of each Begay began raising her three others through The Berea POMC month, from 7 to 9 p.m, at Glades grandchildren in 2005 after her son Chapter. Christian Church, Berea. Ruben, temporarily lost custody. A “Despite what we had to go A GoFundMe page was set up to new job working for the Department through and saw, we endured it,” said fund the group’s trip to the National of Labor’s Native American Program Begay. “You can’t really understand POMC Conference in Orlando, Fla. leading her and the children to relocate until you are in that circumstance.” Ω
Page 18 Summer 2016 Siblings advise siblings SURVIVORS (Continued from p. 11) In memory of a to a worthy cause; survivor of six •Talk about sibling and encourage others to allow you to do so; million homicide •Find someone to share your feelings with if victims who you cannot do so with your parents, but try with found a purpose them. for his life and [From Valley of the Sun newsletter, June 2016] taught the world never to forget – Elie Wiesel (1928-2016)
Your Donations Help to Maintain the Wall’s Physical Beauty
Time and much travel have put stress on the many panels of the Murder Wall...HonoringHonoring Their Memories, Memories and scratches, nicks, and dents need to be repaired. Many of the cases that are used to transport the Wall have split or broken, handles have fallen off, and the protective material inside each case needs to be replaced. Currently, the Wall is made up of 32 panels, display- ing over 3,500 victims‘ names, dates of birth and dates A banner seen on Facebook captures of death.. the point, though it does not refer to InInordertomaintainthebeautyoftheWall,POMCcontinues order to maintain the beauty of the Wall, POMC con- homicide victims. ttinueso seek to donations seek donations to help maketo help some make of some the repairs. of the Torepairs. help, pTolease help, use please the form use below. the form Donations below. made Donations in memory/hono made inr VOL. 34, No. 2, Summer 2016 omemory/honorf a loved one will of be will in thebe in next the issue next of issueSURVIVORS. of Survivors. POMC-Wall Repair (Please Print) Name:______5209-1095 In memory/honor of:______Address:______City, State, Zip:______Amount enclosed: $______Check:____ MO:_____ Visa:____ MC:____ Am. Express:_____ Discover:___ Card Number: ______Sec. Code #: ______Exp. Date:______Return to: POMC, 4960 Ridge Ave., Suite 2, Cincinnati, OH 45209
Summer 2016 Page 19 Parents Of Murdered Children, Inc. For the families and friends of those who have died by violence 4960 Ridge Ave, Suite 2 Cincinnati, OH 45209
The only way I’m going to get but hesitated to talk about the through this is by helping others circumstances of her son’s death in LAS VEGAS, Nev. Five years after her son, Dillon, 19, was murdered, those set-tings. Laura Patterson met POMC in San Diego during the National Day of With POMC, she Remembrance for Murder Victims, Sept. 25, 2015. She was in San Diego for the felt connected. first trial of the accused. The trial wound up with a hung jury (11 to 1). “They were just so When she returned to San Diego this year for the second trial, the jury found supportive when I for the defendant (12-0). Stunned by the outcome, Patterson attended another was there,” she meeting, and when she returned to Las Vegas, she was determined to start a said. chapter there. She said she had sought help from other types of support groups, Dillon Patterson died July 25, 2010. A couple of months earlier, his mother said, he had sneaked out of his INSIDE home in Las Vegas and taken a bus to San Diego County to reconnect with .... his biological family. While there, he Invitations to serve...... 2 >What Are Cold Case Investigations? visited a city park and there he died, ....>What Research Is Needed? CONTACTPERSONS/CHAPTER stabbed by a stranger. National Conference Workshops.....3 LEADERS CORNER...... 12 As for a POMC chapter, the ....>Social Media Guidelines for POMC Comforter enters Desert of Hope POMC Chapter met ...Contest...... 3 ... Chapters officially for the first time on July 6. From the Board Room...... 4 ....>Chapter Donations Four local board members have been ....>Maine Chapter rededicates POMC hosts, participates..13, 15 selected, and Patterson is the Chapter memorial ....>30 years-or-more Chapters Leader. Murder Wall donations and The new Chapter recently found a names added...... 5 SURVIVORS Congratulates.....14 location in the Las Vegas area for the ....>Diane Jones/Mina Hampton Lies told about how you should group to hold its meetings. It meets ...grieve...... 6 ....>Dawn Terrizzi monthly on the first Wednesday from ....>Charlotte & Robert Hullinger ....>Oregon City, Ore. memorial 6:30 -8:30 P.M at the Solutions Well- Listen when working with survivors..7 Donations...... 15 ness Campus/Solutions Recovery, Research Needed to Help PAROLE BLOCK PROGRAM...... 8 Family Survivors?...... 16 ....>Petitions ....>Results ....>IN MEMORIAM Siblings advise homicide-victim Goodbye to Goodbye...... 17 .. .sibling survivors...... 9 Mother of murdered son...... 18 COLDCASECASES:SURVIVORS ....>New Kentucky Chapter in Berea ...COPE...... 10 Only way through this...... 20