ACMS QUIZ – December 2015

TEAM NAME:

Picture Round #1: Who Are These People? * 2 points per correct answer

1) Can you name these four men in this University photograph? All still entertain.

ANSWERS (l-r): (4.6 – 7.1’6 - 7.6 – 5.8 = numbers of letters in each answer)

2) These adorable tykes have 3) Who is this, and what TV 4) These two comics are 51cm both grown up to do the series did he star in for 16.5 apart in height. Who are they, and comedy. Who are they? years? how tall are they (in metres/feet)?

BRUNETTE (3.6): NAME (3.7): MAN (8.3):

BLOND (5.7): SHOW (3.5.4): WOMAN (5.6):

ACMS QUIZ – December 2015

#2: Can you name the comedian, and unscramble their tour title? (The number of letters for anagrams are given crossword style.) * 2 points per answer

#1 (born 1976) #2 (born 1971) #3 (born 1980)

Who is it?: Who is it?: Who is it?:

Show title: Show title: Show title:

Anagram: Beat Sex Spy (5,5) Anagram: Italic Vision (12) Anagram: Designed Idol (12)

#4 (born 1975) #5 (born 1973) #6 (born 1972)

Anagram: Iambic Pea Pushes Anagram: My Whitish Alcove Anagram: Mob Hired (4,4) (7,1'1,6) Wall (2,4,1,4,4,4)

#7 (born 1972) #8 (born 1972) #9 (born 1968)

Anagram: Fish Venom Farce Anagram: Flog Eighties 2 (5,9) Anagram: Lice Payees (7,3) Candelabras (6,11,2,1,3) TEAM NAME:

Round #1: General Knowledge Round #2: Double-Acts

10. 10.

Round #3: Odd One Out Round #4: Musical Comedians

10. 10.

3 TEAM NAME:

Round #5: Autobiographies Round #6: Show Titles

10. 10.

Round #7: Alter-Egos Round #8: Paddy's Jukebox

10. 6.

4 ACMS QUIZ – December 2015 2015 Comedy Quiz (Quite Hard)

Round #1: General Knowledge

1) Which Ghostbuster directed 'Groundhog Day'? Name the person, and the part they played in Ghostbusters.

2) In February of this year, Mark Watson hosted a 27 Hour Show for Red Nose Day, during which Gillian Anderson shaved [Teer-nan Doo-yebb]'s back using hummous as lubricant. Can you spell '[Teer-nan Doo-yebb]'?

3) Adam Hills is missing a foot. Which one?

4) 'Easy Cliché and Tired Stereotype', 'Gaping Flaws' and 'Posturing Delivery' are all titles of 34 year old Russell Kane's Edinburgh shows. From where did he get these titles? 5) "What's happenin' white people?" is just ONE of the funny things [Pawl Chow-dree] has said onstage. Can you spell ‘[Pawl Chow-dree]’?

6) Which member of the Beyond The Fringe revue went on to star in the 1984 film 'Supergirl'?

7) Jessica Hynes starred in the BBC TV series 'Twenty Twelve'. Can you name anyone else from that programme? (NB This recently came up on Pointless. Any actor, apart from Jessica Hynes, would have been pointless. In all senses. Aaah.)

8) Grainne Maguire has recently been doing something to the Taoiseach [Tee-shock] of Ireland? Can you spell her actions out?

9) In November, [See-lee-ya Pa-kwow-lar] won an Australian Academy of Cinema and Television Arts Award. Can you spell '[See-lee-ya Pa-kwow-lar]'?

10) Which former ‘Sea Monster’ spent ten years working as a psychiatric nurse before moving into comedy?

* 2 points for a full answer (and half if you only have eg the surname of an answer)

Round #2: Double-Acts

Can you name the other half of these double-acts? 1) Adam Buxton 2) Mel Giedroyc 3) Stephen Fry 4) Keegan-Michael Key 5) Rob Newman 6) Fanny the Wonder Dog 7) David Mitchell 8) Ray Peacock 9) Dawn French 10) Steve Punt

* 2 points for a full name (1 point for first name, 1 point for surname)

5 ACMS QUIZ – December 2015

Round #3: Odd One Out Round

1) Which of these is NOT the name of a Daniel Kitson show? a) Love, Innocence and the Word Cock, b) Something, c) It's the Fireworks Talking, d) Oh You Poor Man or e) The Interminable Suicide Of Gregory Church

2) Bridget Christie has played many characters onstage, before deciding to stick with ARTICULATE AND FURIOUS WOMAN. Which of these characters has she NOT played? a) A Ant, b) Sarah Palindrome, c) Japanese Knotweed, d) War Donkey, e) King Charles II

3) Grumpy wiseman Stewart Lee has been rude about lots of comedians. Who has the great one NOT complained about, onstage? a) Mark Watson, b) Russell Howard, c) Isy Suttie, d) Lee Mack, e) Franklin Ajaye

4) Only one of these Pleasance venues is REAL. Which one? a) Pleasance Betwixt, b) Pleasance Between, c) Pleasance Beside, d) Pleasance Basement, e) Pleasance Bin

5) Though originally from Carmarthen, Rhod Gilbert has long claimed to be from which fictional Welsh place? a) Llanbobl, b) Llangyllwch, c) Llareggub, d) Llandustyn, e) Pontypandy

6) When Phill Jupitus first started, what name did he perform under? a) Philip of Burgundy, b) Saturn 5, c) Pippi Longstocking, d) Porky the Poet, e) Joop For Men

7) Sir Tim Fitzhigham, FRGS, has done many unlikely things, often as the result of a bet. Which one of these activities has he NOT tried? a) rowing across the Channel in a bathtub, b) morris-dancing from London to Norwich, c) rolling a cheeseboard 3.75 miles in only 100 throws, d) racing a racehorse over 100 yards on foot, e) longest hug between two people

8) The Edinburgh Fringe brings in a lot of money to the city, if not to the acts who perform there. Edinburgh is not the only place to see the value in stand-up. Which of these five cities does NOT play host to a comedy festival? a) Montreal, b) Melbourne, c) Kilkenny, d) Leicester, e) Florence

9) Which of these comedians has NOT appeared in Doctor Who? a) Rufus Hound, b) Frank Skinner, c) Sara Pascoe, d) Bethany Black, e) Ardal O'Hanlon

10) 'It's Pronounced [Ab-ee-go-liar Sha-mawn]' was the name of [Ab-ee-go-liar Sha- mawn]''s 2014 Edinburgh show. Which of the following letters does NOT appear in her name? a) a, b) c, c) b, d) e, e) g

Round #4: Can you identify the comedian[s] from their song lyrics?

* 1 point for singer and, where applicable, 1 point for the group too

1) Let's do it! Let's do it! / Do it while the mood is right! / I'm feeling, appealing / I've really got an appetite! / I'm on fire, with desire. / I could handle half the tenors in a male voice choir. / Let's do it! Let's do it tonight!

2) I'm so worried about what's happening today / In the Middle East, you know / And I'm so worried about the baggage retrieval / System they've got at Heathrow

3) Shaftesbury Theatre! Shaftesbury Theatre! / No-one knows where the FUCK it is! / It's the Shaftesbury Theatre!!

4) There's a ghost in my house! / There's a ghost in my house! / But it's not that bad. / He keeps himself to himself.

5) There's antimony, arsenic, aluminum, selenium / And hydrogen and oxygen and nitrogen and rhenium / And nickel, neodymium, neptunium, germanium / And iron, americium, ruthenium, uranium

6) I go out seal hunting with my best friend Tarka / But all I wanna do is get into his parka / I'm the only gas eskimo / In my tribe

7) If tickets cost a pound a piece / Why should you make a fuss? / It's worth it just to ride inside / That 30-foot-long by 10-foot-wide / Inside that monarch of the road / Observer of the Highway Code / That big six-wheeler / scarlet-painted / London transport diesel- engined / 97-horsepower / 97-horsepower omnibus.

8) Poor umbrella-head boy / His father always leaves him down the station / His mother always leaves him down the shops or in the pub / His sister left him in Imagination… nightclub; Harris Road, Stoke

9) A kiss is not a contract / But it's very nice / Yes it's very nice / Just because you've been exploring my mouth / Doesn't mean you get to take an expedition further south / NO

10) Fuck the motherfucker, and fuck you motherfucker / If you think that motherfucker is sacred / If you cover for another motherfucker who's a kiddie fucker / Fuck you, you're no better than the motherfucking rapist / And if you don't like this swearing that the motherfucker forced from me / And reckon it shows moral or intellectual paucity / Then fuck you motherfucker, this is language one employs / When one is fucking cross about fuckers fucking boys

Round #5: Can you name the comic from their autobiography title? * 1 point each

1. Born Standing Up: A Comic's Life 6. Me:Moir - Volume One: v. 1 2. My Booky Wook 7. Nerd Do Well 3. Pryor Convictions: And Other Life 8. My Name is Daphne Fairfax: A Memoir Sentences 9. A Liar's Autobiography 4. Bossypants 10. It's Not Me, It's You!: Impossible perfectionist, 5. Moab Is My Washpot 27, seeks very very very tidy woman

Round #6: Can you name these solo comics from three of their Edinburgh show titles? * 1 point each

1. Death of a Sails-Man; Meanwhile; Problems 2. Keep Hold of the Gold; Dare to Dream; One Man Mega Myth 3. Becaves; Because; Befrdfgth 4. The Slut in the Hut; Masterslut; The Slutcracker 5. Birdwatching; Word Watching; Monsieur Butterfly 6. Kindness and Exuberance; Trying is Good; Be Honourable! 7. So I Suppose THIS Is Offensive Now; Y'know Love 'n' God 'n' Metaphysics 'n' Shit; Hasn't Heard of You Either 8. A Bic For Her; My Daily Mail Hell; Housewife Surrealist 9. The Dog of Time; Nonsense Overdrive; Enter The Tonezone 10. Detonates 70 Minutes of Unbridled Afternoon; Satirist for Hire; Boldly Unbuttons The Cloak Of Civilisation, But Is Perplexed And Perturbed By What He Finds Lurking Beneath

Round #7: Can you put the real name to these comedic alter-egos?

* 2 points for a full name 3. John Shuttleworth 7. Count Arthur Strong 4. Pauline Calf 8. Dame Edna Everage 1. Marcel Lucont 5. Mrs Merton 9. Ivan Brackenbury 2. Alan Parker, Urban Warrior 6. Gary Le Strange 10. Garth Marenghi

Round #8: Paddy is a Jukebox [round sung by ‘And The Baptists’]

1) "The questionable phoenix / We think he's just a pigeon…" The Phoenix at Oxford Circus is home to which Monday night new material gig? * 1 point

2) "We've come full circle, Angela Merkel / Said things that were hurtful, Angela Merkel…" FOTSN's Helen Arney bills herself as having "the voice of an angle". Can you name the two others who are in the Festival of the Spoken Nerd? * 2 points (1 for each person)

3) "Little Chinese boy, playing with his drum…" Who has Margaret Cho recently kicked off about, for donning "yellow face" as a Japanese man in the upcoming Ab Fab movie? * 2 points

4) "Oh-oh woah-oh / We're the UK Independence Party!" Which comedian won 318 votes, standing against Nigel Fah-ridge in Thanet South this year? FULL NAME/TITLE (5 words). * 1 point What was the name of his political party? * 2 points for full thing (1 point if just initials)

5) "Quentin Blake…" Quentin Blake illustrated 'The Boy In The Dress'. Which TV funnyman wrote that book? What is his real name? * 1 point for each answer

6) "Buckets of cum, buckets of cum / Where have all these buckets of cum come from / Someone must've had a really massive -wait it's paint." That song was by Jonny & The Baptists. What is the title of the one-man play that Jonny has been touring since 2013? * 1 point

Round #9: Link These Up

Draw a line to connect your answers. You will get 1 point for each correct answer.

John Robins often takes his show titles from band lyrics. Can you match these titles with the musicians and groups who inspired them? Lift Your Skinny Fists Like Antennas to Heaven Bonnie Prince Billy

Nomadic Revery Bon Iver #1 Skinny Love Neko Case

This Tornado Loves You Godspeed You! Black Emperor

Where Is My Mind The Pixies

The Gilded Balloon's So You Think You're Funny Awards have gone to many excellent comedians. Can you match the comic with the year they won? Aisling Bea 1989

David O'Doherty 1993

Dylan Moran 1997 #2 Ivo Graham 1999

Peter Kay 2005

Phil Kay 2009

Tom Allen 2012

Can you match these comedians with the products they have been paid to pimp?

Chris Addison Sky Broadband

Dawn French Direct Line car insurance

Thom Tuck John Smiths beer

Jack Dee Nutri-grain cereal bars #3 Johnny Vegas Magners Pear Cider

Lenny Henry PG Tips tea

Mark Watson Premier Inn hotels

Eric Lampaert Terry's Chocolate Orange

John-Luke Roberts News of the World

#10: Can you identify what links the acts on the Bakerloo (……………..……..…..), Jubilee (…..………………………..)and Northern (…………….…………..) lines?

ACMS QUIZ – December 2015

a pause of a page, cos you’re almost up to the answers

by Pei Yen

and it’s nice to have a solid gold excuse to include this cartoon

ACMS QUIZ – December 2015 – ANSWERS

Round #1: General Knowledge Round #3: Odd One Out 1. Harold Ramis; Egon Spengler 1. d) Oh You Poor Man 2. Tiernan Douieb 2. b) Sarah Palindrome 3. Right foot 3. c) Isy Suttie 4. Previous years' reviews by Steve 4. c) Pleasance Beside Bennett on Chortle 5. a) Llanbobl  2007 title "easy cliché and tired 6. d) Porky the Poet stereotype" was in his 2006 review 7. e) longest hug  2008 title "gaping flaws" was in his 8. e) Florence 2007 review 9. c) Sara Pascoe  2012 title "posturing delivery" was in 10. d) the letter 'e' his 2011 review (1 point per answer; 10 points = max) 5. Paul Chowdhry 6. Peter Cook Round #4: Music & Comedians 7. Hugh Bonneville, Seb Coe, Vincent 1. Victoria Wood Franklin, Amelia Bulmore, Olivia Colman, 2. Monty Python's Terry Jones Karl Theobald, Morven Christie, Sara Pascoe, Jonny Sweet; David Tennant 3. Eddie Izzard narrated… 4. Tom Basden 8. Tweeting intimate details of her period 5. Tom Lehrer to Enda Kenny, to draw attention to the 6. Corky & The Juice Pigs (Sean Cullen, campaign to repeal the 8th Amendment Phil Nichol, Greg Neale) and legalise abortion in Ireland 7. [Michael] Flanders & [Donald] Swann 9. Celia Pacquola 8. Boothby Graffoe 10. Jo Brand 9. Flight of the Conchords (Bret McKenzie & Jemaine Clement) Round #2: Double-Acts 10. Tim Minchin 1. Joe Cornish 2. Sue Perkins Round #5: Autobiographies 3. Hugh Laurie 1. Steve Martin 4. Jordan Peele 2. Russell Brand 5. David Baddiel 3. Richard Pryor 6. Julian Clary / Joan Collins Fan Club 4. Tina Fey 7. Robert Webb 5. Stephen Fry 8. Ed Gamble 6. Jim Moir / Vic Reeves 9. Jennifer Saunders 7. Simon Pegg 10. Hugh Dennis 8. Arthur Smith 9. Graham Chapman 10. Jon Richardson

Round #6: Show Titles 1. Sam Simmons 2. Nick Helm 3. Dr Brown (Phil Burgers) 4. Tim Key 5. Alex Horne 6. Josie Long

7. Brendon Burns  1989 - Phil Kay 8. Bridget Christie 9. Tony Law 3) HAWKERS 10. Andy Zaltzman  Chris Addison - Direct Line car insurance Round #7 - Alter-Egos  Dawn French - Terry's Chocolate 1. Alexis Dubus Orange 2. Simon Munnery  Thom Tuck - News of the World 3. Graham Fellows  Jack Dee - John Smiths beer 4. Steve Coogan  Johnny Vegas - PG Tips tea 5. Caroline Aherne  Lenny Henry - Premier Inn hotels 6. Waen Shepherd  Mark Watson - Magners Pear Cider 7. Steve Delaney  Eric Lampaert - Sky Broadband 8. Barry Humphries  John-Luke Roberts - Nutri-grain 9. Tom Binns cereal bars 10. Matthew Holness Round #10: The Tube Round #8 - Paddy sings  Bakerloo - Overseas 1. Old Rope  Jubilee - TV acts 2a. Steve Mould  Northern – Musical 2b. Matt Parker 3. Janette Tough (Wee Jimmy Krankie) PICTURE ROUNDS 4a. Al Murray, The Pub Landlord 4b. Free United Kingdom Party Round #1 - Who Are These People? 5a. David Walliams 1) UNI MEN ARE (l-r): John Oliver, 5b. David Williams Desmond O'Connor, Richard Ayoade, 6. Every Brilliant Thing David Mitchell 2) Brunette = Fin Taylor, Blond = Paddy Round #9: Link These Up Gervers 3) The Daily Show's Jon Stewart 1) JOHN ROBINS SHOW TITLES 4) Humphrey Ker, wh is 2.01m tall (6'7"),  Lift Your Skinny Fists Like Antennas Susan Calman, who is 1.5m (4'11") tall to Heaven - Godspeed You! Black Emperor Round #11 - Pictures  Nomadic Revery - Bonnie Prince Billy 1. Alan Carr: Spexy Beast  Skinny Love - Bon Iver 2. Chris Addison: Civilisation  This Tornado Loves You - Neko Case 3. Russell Howard: Dingledodies  Where Is My Mind - Pixies 4. Sarah Millican: Home Bird 5. Shappi Khorsandi: Because I'm Shappi 2) GILDED BALLOON YEARS 6. Miranda Hart: My, What I Call, Live Show  2012 - Aisling Bea 7. Jimmy Carr: Charm Offensive  2009 - Ivo Graham 8. Jason Byrne: Special Eye  2005 - Tom Allen 9. Greg Davies: Firing Cheeseballs At A  1999 - David O'Doherty Dog  1997 - Peter Kay (grown-up picture proofs overleaf)  1993 - Dylan Moran

The Comics All Recreated These Pictures for A Photo Shoot, Bless

#1 (born 1976) #2 (born 1971) #3 (born 1980)

Alan Carr: Spexy Beast Chris Addison: Civilisation Russell Howard: Dingledodies

#4 (born 1975) #5 (born 1973) #6 (born 1972)

Shappi Khorsandi: Miranda Hart: Sarah Millican: Home Bird Because I'm Shappi My, What I Call, Live Show

#7 (born 1972) #8 (born 1972) #9 (born 1968)

Jimmy Carr: Greg Davies: Firing Jason Byrne: Special Eye Charm Offensive Cheeseballs At A Dog