E C N E I R E P X E D E V I L E H T THINKSTOCK Experience AD and continue the discussion, whatever your whatever the faith, discussion, and continue r some personal experiences submitted by readers. Ple ED OE O PR A OVRAIN BU TE SPIRITUA THE ABOUT CONVERSATION ADHD with A living of SPARK TO LOVE WE’D tion myself. of God and that negativity affected my percep- with connection intimate an have could I I concluded I was broken. There was no way asked, “What’s wrong with me?” Over time, dis- I time. prayer my my during thoughts tracted about over and over thought I God. with intimatelyconnecting not was I I universe!”thethen otherof sidetheon mustbe here, are you if “God, thought, I started. I when intended I anything about prayed not had I realize to only mind my in everywhere ping-ponging constant of experience an was Prayer place. quiet a in What was I supposed to be praying about? for.ing Hey, praying!besupposedare youto I never made a prayer list. It’s my pen I’m look- minute, where is my prayer list? prayer my is where a minute, Wait today? meeting that is time What done. get to have I what about thinking Now,I’m racing. starts mind My praying. It went something like this. intimately with God. connecting for used method the was time dardizedform known as “quiettime.” Quiet packaged up and were delivered prayer inand a generic,study Bible stan- like ciplines thespiritual disciplines were a big deal. Dis- believedit.Specifically,Iwhy believeand I and on my own. alone was convincedI wassituation.that I experience was private suffering in a hopeless that,beatinglongtime.formyselfa up My best efforts to please him. I judgedmy despite myself me of for required God thought I not happy with me. I kept falling short of all forethatdiagnosis, believedI thatGodwas I was diagnosed with ADHD as an adult. Be- Steve Gundy QUIET TIME My perspective changed the day I realized focus to trying excruciating it found I HereamIin quieta room ready to start But then, quiet time collided with reality. what know to me trained church My HD and Spirituality . At this reflective and hopeful time of year,begi we of time hopeful and reflective this At

Oh yeah, yeah, Oh back on the other senses and focussensesand other the onback cut to just but pious, or holy be to stimuli. I close my eyes, not to appear can go on during the entire service. hymn? next the is page what on help? I see the hymnal and start need priest to the think, Does there? servers the sitting.amfrom whereI serversAre tar is a pretty bird outside. I don’t see any al- flying by the church window—whoa, that ought to go to brunch after Mass. I problem.see big birds the ilycanI be easily distracted. My eyes are be a problem. During Mass and the hom- tured prayer environment, my ADHD can to prayer. ADHD is a two-edged sword when it comes A CHADD member DISTRACTION DEALING WITH PRAYER I know I’m not alone!me. made God way the with consistently whenI’m journaling. Now, I’m acting more wheremycreative mind isgoing, especially any- goes that God with conversation ing alive.That ignited mypassion foranongo- come God with time my made that ences experi- stimulating with playing started I engaged when I journaled my thoughts. mon.Instead myof mind wandering, it was inchurch when my pastor delivered his ser- I started applying journaling to myenergy neededI experiencefor my prayer time. In fact, ing the prayers out loud created the focuswriting and my prayers in a journal andfocus. During thenthat process discoveredread-I that differentme helpstartedtryingtothings I how ADHDshowed up in my life, the more knowto got diagnosis.ADHD Imore The edthoughts during my prayer time and my there was a connection between my distract- My solution is to reduce the the reduce to is solution My When I am in a more formal and struc- Instead of looking for quiet places, places, quiet for looking of Instead eligious tradition, or practice.tradition, eligious ase ase share your stories with us Oh there is Rob… we we Rob… is there Oh This This L SIDE SIDE L n with with n 31 on my hearing sense. I find when I do that mysteries is the Agony in the Garden. When My daughter was first on line to sign up as a I can concentrate on what is happening just someone is praying this mystery he says ten server as soon as she reached that milestone. through the words that I hear, and my mind Hail Marys and simultaneously meditates on In high school, some of the young adults help does not wander off so frequently. It’s not a the event of the agony. What was Jesus think- with the readings for the little ones and some perfect solution, but it helps. ing? What was he praying about? What were serve as greeters; others can leave a little early On the other hand, ADHD can be helpful the Apostles doing? One part of the brain is if they volunteer to help set up for the after in meditative prayer. One particular form of saying the Hail Mary while the other half of service hospitality. meditative prayer is called lectio divinia . This the brain is in meditation. I think that this is It helps to find a church that is understand- is a form of prayer going back to at least the the perfect type of prayer for someone with ing of all children’s needs, but especially those second century AD. You read the Bible, and ADHD because both halves of the brain are who may find church services a “penance.” when a particular word or phrase catches occupied with activity, leaving little or no your attention, you stop reading and reflect room for distractions. OPPOSITIONALITY IN THE PEW on what you have just read. This can take a Try it, you might like it. A CHADD member moment or much longer. The idea is to be We attended church every Sunday as a open to the leadings of the Holy Spirit to AN UNDERSTANDING CHURCH family. My daughter has difficulty regulat- teach you. For person with ADHD, this comes A CHADD member ing her moods and my son has academic naturally and is one of those few times that we Parents of children with ADHD really enjoy struggles. Situations that required sitting still are actually encouraged to let our minds won- the best, most relaxed time at church when and listening for a long period of time was der. For a person who does not have ADD, this the kindergartners through fifth graders a huge challenge for both of them, albeit for type of prayer is much more difficult because leave for their own children’s readings. You different reasons. they are focused on the next word or thought can almost hear a sigh of relief that, at least As part of the service, congregants extend and not inclined to stop and wonder. for the readings and homily, the parents are a sign of peace to nearby pewmates. For fam- Catholics pray the rosary. To many it able to pay attention to something other ily and close friends, warm hugs and quick seems like just a repetitive prayer droning than wiggly little ones. kisses are exchanged. For acquaintances and on and on, but the rosary is really a series of Boredom with sitting quietly for a whole others nearby, it is usually a handshake and meditations. There are four series of myster- hour really sets in when the children hit sixth the words, “Peace be with you.” The atmo- ies on which to meditate, one of which is grade. Fortunately, at my church, sixth grad- sphere is one of peace and good will. the Sorrowful Mysteries. The first of these ers are eligible to be altar servers and ushers. Going along with the program can be dif-

32 Attention go with the parts my insurance covered or send her to her best friend’s counselor. Eventually, my daughter became inter- ested in a youth group at a nearby church. Her life and her spiritual journey jigged and jagged. Now that she is a young adult, I have faith that she will find what works for her.

SLOW PREACHING Steve Peer When I was growing up, my minister was a slow talker—slower than the typical 110 to 150 words per minute. The trouble is that most of us can process language at three to five times that speed. What would I do with all that leftover processing capacity? Of course, my mind would wander away from ficult for an eleven-year-old girl who is prone her mother and this was beyond disrespectful. the topic. to oppositionality. This atmosphere of con- I would love to tell you I handled this This is the reason some podcasts also of- geniality often put my daughter in a stormy situation expertly. But I didn’t. I cried on fer a double-speed version, by the way. With mood. One time after the sign of peace, when the way home and then called my sister to the brain more fully engaged, comprehension the congregation becomes quiet and solemn, I vent. But I really handled it pretty ineffec- actually increases. leaned over to ask her to stop making a repeti- tively. It was lost on me at that time that this Back at church, no such podcast was avail- tive noise with her shoe. In the loudest stage was a symptom of a bigger problem. And able. So I’d always have a Bible in hand. Hav- whisper I’ve ever heard, she said, “Shut up!” big problems call for complex solutions. ing visual redundancy of the spoken sermon I was horrified! My mother’s friend from the If I could re-do my daughter’s childhood, allowed me to engage two senses. And if I did choir was sitting behind us, the entire church I really would really listen when experts wander, it was usually by reading ahead, so ●A THINKSTOCK had just wished each other peace... plus, I’m say multimodal treatment, and not just I remained connected to the topic.

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