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MlT'S' The Weather \ Oldest and Largest Today: Overcast, cool, 48°F (9°C) Tonight: Cloudy, 36°F (30C) Newspaper Tomorrow: Showers, 20°F (-7°C) Details, Page 2

Volume 119, Number 16 Cambridge, Massachusetts 02139 Friday, April 2, 1999 'Click and Clack' Will Deliver 1999 Commencement Speech By Frank Dabek MIT's best-known and best-loved have been pretty serious and 1think NEWS EDITOR graduates." MIT is in serious need of humor." The Tappet brothers, 'Click and Clack,' of National Public Radio's . Student leaders tickled by choice Ray operates Cambridge garage ) Car Talk fame, have been selected Pooja Shukla '99, president of Tom Magliozzi earned a Ph.D. as MIT's next commencement the graduating class, said that Click in management from Boston speakers.. and Clack were a "hilarious pair." University and served as an associ- Known as Tom and Ray Shukla thinks that "the class will ate professor at Suffolk University Magliozzi to those who don't listen be really pleased to have a unique for five years before leaving to take to the show, .the two are graduates and genuinely fun commence- up Car Talk full time. . of MIT. Tom Magliozzi graduated ment." She said that the brothers Ray Magliozzi continues to 1. in 1958 with a degree in economics "can speak to the intellectual side operate the Good News Garage in while his brother took a humanities of the audience .as well as the play- Cambridge. degree in 1972. ful side." . Between the two of them, the President Charles M. Vest said, Graduate . Student Council brothers have taken Physics I (8.01) " "We're proud and excited that Tom President Brian 1. Schneider G also a total of four times. and Ray Magliozzi will be returning praised the selection of a humorous Commencement speakers in to their alma mater as speaker: "I'm excited to see a little recent years have included President "/ Commencement speakers." He said humor visit MIT at this year's com- Clinton, David Ho, and UN .that the brothers "rank among mencement. The last couple of years Secretary General Kofi Annan. \.Licensing Board Allows Sigma Nn To Reside inFonner Fiji Honse By Rima Arnaout about the outcome of the hearing, dedicated to their futures." ASSOCIATE NEWS EDITOR said Nathaniel V., Houle '02, "but Dorow represented MIT in sup- For the first time since Phi we knew we had a strong case, and port of Sigma Nu at Wednesday's Gamma Delta's dormitory license then during the hearing there wasn't hearing. "The tragic history of this was suspended in January 1998 , an really a lot of opposition at all." particular address is one in which MIT fraternity will reside at 28 The Elizabeth Dooley of the Ladies' the members of Sigma Nu had no AJAI BIfARADWAJ-THE TECH 1;' Fenway. Yesterqay, the Boston Guild next door to Sigma Nu was part, and for which they certainly Lanl Rapp '01 avoids a Babson College opponent as she takes Licensing Board granted the MIT "very concerned that people thought bear no responsibility," Dorow said. the ball upfleld Tuesday. chapter of the Sigma Nu fraternity a they were a drinking organization. (:. dormitory license to move from 523 They are good neighbors and... are Sigma Nu, Page 18 Newbury Street to 28 The Fenway, . formerly home to Fiji. , The license is cont,ingent upon Barney Frank Promotes Student Political Activity ''-, Sigma Nu'g"maintenance,of its poli- By Frank Dabek , Frank advocated voting and The majority of Frank's remarks sometimes see from the results) do cy that there can 'be no alcohol on NEWS EDITOR other forms of traditional involve- were dedicated to addressing rea- not give a voting test." the premises at any time. The Democracy Teach-Ins con- ment in the democratic process as sons why.students fail to vote. He "I'm very happy for Sigma Nu tinued last night in Rm. 54-100 with the best means of affecting change. systematically proposed and Voting and civil disobedience ': and very happy that the board a talk by Rep. Barney Frank, D.• Frank began by pointing out that debunked common complaints Frank devoted a great deal of allowed them to occupy 28 The Mass 8th. Frank's free-wheeling "most 18 to 21 year olds militantly about the voting system. time to comparing civil disobedi- Fenway," said Neal H. Dorow, and often irreverent speech focuse.d refuse to vote." When students fail Frank addressed concerns that ence to voting. He pointed out that . , adviser to fraternities, sororities, and on encouraging students to vote but to vote they shouldn't be surprised voting is complicated by pointing the great activist movements of this .• independent ljving groups. he also shared his views on gay when they are ignored by politi- out that voting is easier than getting century, led by Ghandi and Martin A hearing to grant the license rights and drug laws.. cians. a driver's license: "we (as you can Luther King Jr. were forced to civil was held Wednesday at Boston City disobedience precisely because the 4 ; Hall. The official decision was made groups were barred from vot!ng. the following day. Such disobedience should be a last Sigma Nu President Justin M. resort, he said. Schmidt '01, Vice-President David Frank said that while many may (: B. Berman '99, and President of the consider voting to be "weak tea" Sigma Nu Alumni House and refuse to vote to punish politi- Corporation Michael D. Plusch pre- cians, such arguments are "nuts." .,i'. sented Sigma Nu's case to the He said that while corporations Licensing Board. may be affected, "demonstrations The mention of 28 The Fenway, rarely affect politicians." Negative the location of the drinking death of demonstrations and "being . t Scott S. Krueger '01, initially attacked by your enemies only brought up concerns on behalf of leads to an increase in fundrais- the Licensing Board about letting ing," Frank said. another MIT fraternity occupy that Frank related a personal anec- building. Chairman of the Licensing dote of a sit-in threatened by sup- " Board Daniel F. Pokaski expressed porters of Lyndon LaRouche. "concern about MIT's really not Frank said that he advised his staff ',' getting it as far as taking care of to call the press first, then the people under their care." police: "I want the credit for arresting them." Dorow, ,neighbors defend Sigma Nu The message the Frank drove ,<•. Even at the hearing, however, home over the course of the address Sigma Nu's track record of good was that voting was a more effective behavior, its references from neigh- method of influencing government '.... bors, and its no-alcohol policy than demonstration. He classified " seemed to convince the Licensing the National Rifle Association as Board that Sigma Nu would be a GREG KUHNEN-THE TECH "very effective" but pointed out that responsible member of the Fenway Congressman Bamey Frank talks about how students can have an Impact on politics and the govern- they "never had a shoot-in" nor did community. ' ment last night In 54-100. The lecture was part of the 1999 Democracy Teach-Ins which will continue tonight 7pm and tomorrow night Spm. "We were a little apprehensive" at at Frank, Page 19

... Ray Stat~ wW_ Comics Daylight Savings World & Nation 2 Time begins help to Sunday. Don't Opinion ' .4 launch a $1 forget to set Arts 6 billion capi- your clocks one On The Screen 10 tal campaign. hour forward at 2 a.m. Crossword Puzzle .14 Page 17 Page 12 Sports 20 Page2 THE TECH April 2, 1999 "... WORLD & NATION Clinton Urges Patience iIi Kosovo .. TilE "~4.SIlINGTON POST Three U.S..Soldiers Missing NORFOLK. VA. President Clinton, facing perhaps the gravest military challenge of ," his presidency, came to a major naval base Thursday to thank those Amidst Widening in the armed services and to urge public perseverance in the battle Conflict against Yugoslav President Slobodan Milosevic' s forces. Clinton received a warm welcome in a giant hangar, but his mes- By James Gerstenzang, Paul Infantry Division based in planners preferred. They have fired .., sage was complicated by his administration's ongoing struggle to ful- Richter and Elizabeth Shogren Wurzburg, Germany. They had more than 100. All told, the military fill its mission in Yugoslavia and by military families' unhappiness LOS ANGELES TIMES arrived in early March to relieve campaign is costing the Pentagon an over low pay, poor housing and long periods of separation. WASHINGTON another contingent. estimated several hundred million .• Before speaking to several hundred people at the Norfolk Naval Three U.S. Army soldiers in The soldiers are part of Task dollars a week. Station, Clinton met privately with 18 spouses and children of enlist- Macedonia patrolling Yugoslavia's Force Able Sentry, which had been -A United Nations court said it ed personnel deployed in the Balkans, the Persian Gulf and else- southern border were reported miss- in Macedonia to stabilize the region has indicted Zeljko Raznatovic, a where. There he heard blunt complaints, "steeped in candor," about ing late Wednesday after they but was supplanted by a NATO notorious Serbian paramilitary : the frustrations of military life, according to officers who attended. radioed fellow soldiers that they force, whose original goal was to leader known as'" Arkan," in One mother, the wife of a full-time military employee, told Clinton were under fire, according to NATO enforce any Kosovo peace accord. September 1997 on allegations of she is drawing welfare benefits because her husband's pay is so low. and Pentagon officials. The names of the soldiers were committing war crimes during the "As a patriot ... she felt that that was wrong, and she made that crystal The soldiers' disappearance not being released pending notifica- Bosnian civil war in the mid-1990s. ,,'\ clear to the president," said Adm. Paul Reason, who described the scene came as the allied bombardment of tion of their family members. He has been seen in Belgrade in to reporters. In his speech in the hangar, Clinton praised the group's .Yugoslavia entered its second week. '''There was an incident, and recent days. frankness and noted that his new defense budget calls for "a substantial In a day of wide-ranging action, investigations are going on," Maj. -The Clinton administration r\ pay raise" for military personnel. He has proposed a 4.4 percent pay bombers struck for the first time David Pashen, duty officer at the said it was setting aside $50 million hike, although Congress is moving to approve an even larger increase. near the heart of the Yugoslav capi- NATO media information center in to help provide food and shelter for tal, Belgrade, Russia ordered war- Skopje. Pashen said he could not go the more than 580,000 people of ships steaming toward the conflict, into any other details about what Kosovo that the State Department , Hopes Rise in Paraguay and Serbian forces continued an happened to the soldiers, their cur- estimates have been uprooted. mE II'ASIlING TON POST unrestrained rampage across rent location or the mission under- -At least 7,000 men, women ASUNCION. PARAGUA Y Kosovo. way to rescue them. and children were marched to the As snipers' bullets rained down from rooftops in this South The U.S. reconnaissance team A Pentagon official in train station in Kosovo' s capital, r.... American capital, Carlos Dario Candido, 21, clutched the arm of his had been traveling in a Humvee Washington said the soldiers may Pristina. No independent witnesses university buddy Victor Hugo Molas and ran. Thousands of other stu~ northwest of the Kumanovo area, have been abducted by Serbian sol- were allowed to see what happened ~ dents who had turned out for an anti-government rally last weekend about 20 miles from Skopje" the diers, Serbian secret police or even to them next, but a Serbian joumal- .'It scurried around them in panic. Seconds later, Candido felt Molas' Macedonian capital, and just south Serbian radicals in Macedonia. ist said they were being taken south body violently lurch away from him, landing hard with a thump on of the Serbian border. An Army In other developments to the Macedonian border. the grass. Amid the screams and trampling feet, Candido bent down unit, with British and Macedonian Wednesday: -The Vatican's foreign minis- and held his friend, who died in his arms. troops, began a search on the -Pentagon officials expressed ter, Archbishop Jean-Louis Tauran, :~ The sniper attack - widely believed to have been carried out by ground and by helicopter. concern that the Air Force and Navy was heading to Belgrade Thursday henchmen of a renegade ex-general who was supported by The soldiers were part of the 4th were depleting their supply of cruise with a personal appeal for peace Paraguay's president - killed Molas and four other students and Cavalry Regiment of the 1st missiles more rapidly than some from Pope John Paul II. , wounded dozens more. The deadliest incident here since this small, insular nation emerged from decades of dictatorship in 1989, it launched a campaign of violence that many Paraguayans saw as a thinly veiled attempt to return this nation to authoritarian rule. Milosevic Wms.Public Support ;. But as Candido told his story while holding his friend's blood- stained shirt, the student said he believed Molas' sacrifice had helped his nation pass yet another test in its troubled transition to democracy. "Victor would have been proud to die if it meant we would finally get Through Propaganda Actions > some kind of justice and democracy here," Candido said. By Paul Watson Amid the relentless pressure of Over the past year, Rugova's LOS ANGELES TIMES NATO bombings and'international political influence and stature .• Mexican Governor Disappears PRISTINA, YUGOSLAVIA_ outrage ill reaction to liis "scorched declined as the Kosovo Liberation TilE WASIlINGTON POST On the propaganda front, at earth" campaign in Kosovo, show- Army's guerrilla war did more to MEXICO CITY least, Yugoslav President Slobodan ing off enemy prisoners and meet- advance the independence cause A state governor under investigation for alleged ties to Mexico's Milosevic scored two big victories ing with a political foe made than a decade of Rugova' s peaceful ~j most powerful drug cartel has disappeared just days before police were Thursday, trotting out three cap- Milosevic's day. resistance campaign. expected to seek his arrest for drug trafficking and money laundering, tured U.S. soldiers and meeting with Rugova, a Paris-educated paci- Being so friendly with Milosevic according to law enforcement officials here. Gov. Mario Villanueva of the top Kosovo Albanian politician. fist, was twice elected president of on state-run television when much r"', the Yucatan Peninsula state of Quintana Roo had been under police sur- Video of the American soldiers, Kosovo by its ethnic Albanian of Kosovo is being cleared of its veillance but apparently eluded the agents who were tailing him, an offi- at least one apparently bruised and majority in underground elections ethnic Albanian majority isn't likely cial here said. Villanueva's six-year term, during which he, as a sitting bloodied, led state television news Milosevic refused to recognize. to help Rugova' s image among his governor, has immunity from prosecution, ends Monday, and the bulletins every hour until late after- Rugova also wants independence own people. Mexican media and law enforcement officials suggested Wednesday noon, when Milosevic matched it for Kosovo, an idea M.ilosevic Even as Rugova was smiling that he may have gone into hiding or fled the country to avoid arrest. If with another TV coup. rejects. with Milosevic at the president's Villanueva, a member of the ruling Institutional Revolutionary Party The Yugoslav leader, who nor- The two signed a brief statement palace in Belgrade, the Yugoslav ,f• (PRI), were to flee Mexico aild evade charges, it would be a stunning mally is pictured sitting stiff and saying "they are both committed to leader inten~ified his brutal reign of blow to the country's justice system. For decades, corruption at the scowling in an armchair, was shown the political process. and that the terror in Kosovo' s capital, Pristina, highest levels of Mexico's federal and state governments has been well smiling and chatting with ethnic (Kosovo) problem can be solved and across the separatist province. documented, but few have ever been held accountable. Albanian leader Ibrahim Rugova in successfully, and for a long-lasting Serbian police, soldiers and Belgrade, as if the two were old period, only by political means," paramilitary groups continued to' friends. state-run television reported. work in teams going door to. door. WEATHER t Spring Where? SituatIon for Noon Eastern Standard Time, Friday, April 2, 1999 By Bill Ramstrom STAFF METEOROLOGIST After a couple of beautiful days, we unfortunately will be returning to more normal springtime weather, so hopefully you have enjoyed a nice walk or bike

ride by the Charles River. Climatological data for early April shows highs in the , ( low 50s and lows in the mid 30s. In fact, for today, we will likely remain a bit J below normal, with cloudy skies and a cool breeze off the ocean. Despite the cool weather, the later sunset on Sunday at 7: 15pm, due to Daylight Savings Time, will ' help make it feel more Spring-like. A broad storm system in the lower Midwest will move up over the Great Lakes and into Canada over the weekend. This will bring a warm front across New England late on Saturday and allow more comfortable temperatures, though also a chance of showers. Thus we can expect clouds through the weekend, with cooler temperatures, near 50°F, on Saturday, and somewhat warmer for Sunday. Today: Overcast and cool, with a damp sea breeze. High 48°F (9°C). Tonight: Continued cloudy. Low 36°F (3°C). Saturday: A few peeks of sun in the morning, chance of showers by late after- noon. Remaining cool. High 50°F (10°C). Saturday Night: Chance of showers. Temperatures fall only into.the mid 40s (7-8°C). Sunday: Morning showers. Some clearing by late in the day. High 55°F (13°C). Outlook for Monday: Sunny and cool with a northerly wind.

Weather Systems Weather FronL~ Precipitation Symbols Other S mbols Snow Rain _ Trough Fog H High Pre"u", . - S"""'~rs - Thundcnlorm ...... Warm Front \l* \l 'R Low Pre ..",", Light H;u.., L 0::> ) ~~ ColdFmnl Moderale * Compiled by MIT • ~ Hurricane ** Meteorology 5131f ...... Occluded Fronl Heavy 11* and 1M Trclr ,April 2, 1999 WORLD & NATION THE TECH Page 3' .Chinese Premier Zhu Rongji's New-Look IRS Faces Problems NEWSDA}' WASHINGTON .VISitto U.S. Under Discussion "Good luck in the bull's eye," Sen. Bob Kerrey wrote when he sent his scratchy pencil-drawn organizational chart to newly con- By John Pomfret one of several indications that States for leading the bombing cam- firmed Internal Revenue Service Commissioner Charles O. Rossotti THE WASHINGTON POST China's leadership is debating the paign against Yugoslavia and for 16 months ago. BEIJING wisdom of sending Zhu to the Washington's decision to sponsor a The IRS commissioner is the bull's eye in the Nebraska The Foreign Ministry declined to United States. resolution critical of China's human Democrat's doodle, the target for arrows Rossotti drew in his Senate provide details Thursday about The prime minister wants to rights record at the U.N. Human confirmation hearing two years ago from 16 officials and agencies .Premier Zhu Rongji's scheduled trip make the trip, one Chinese source Rights Commission in Geneva. Its that have something to say about how the giant tax-collecting agency to the United States next week, a said, but other, more conservative officials also are concerned about does its work. They included the treasury secretary, Treasury dramatic indication of a debate on elements in China are using the what they fear to be a rising tide of Department deputy and six assistant and undersecretaries, the vice the wisdom of the summit among NATO airstrikes against Yugoslavia anti-Chinese feeling in the United president's Reinventing Government task force, the General ',$enior Chinese leaders. as an excuse to raise questions about States, where China recently has Accounting Office and six committees of Congress. Foreign Ministry spokesman Sun his journey. been accused of stealing nuclear After 16 months in office, Rossotti has the drawing framed and Yuxi said he had "nothing to add" Meanwhile, Commerce weapons secrets. hung in his office, although he hardly needs the reminder. to earlier statements that Zhu would Secretary William Daley, in China China's reaction to the attacks As Americans prepare for their annual rendezvous with the tax 'travel to the United States this on an official trip, said he saw no on Yugoslavia has been unusual, collector, Rossotti and the IRS have been peppered with a steady beat month. The White House has reason to worry. however, in its virulence. One state- of criticism for the agency's heavy-handed enforcement, for its ongo- announced that Zhu will arrive on "I've not heard any speculation run newspaper said the United ing problems with administration, financial management and technol- t\pril 6 and visit several ~erican ... as to any chance that (the trip) States and its allies have "raped" ogy, and the substantial obstacles it still faces. Cities. The visit is part of an effort to would be canceled or postponed," Yugoslavia. Chinese papers are rou- improve ties between Chinese and Daley told a news conference in the tinely comparing the U.S.-led air American leaders. southern city of Guangzhou. ,assault with Nazi Germany's attacks Three New Eastern Europe NATO \ The Foreign Ministry's silence is ,China is angry at the United on Yugoslavia during World War II. Members Exposed To Serbs Wrath 1.0S ANG£l.ES TIMES .North Ireland Peace Discussion SARAJEVO. BOSNIA.IIERZEGOVINA Polish troops are flanked by seething Serbs as they guard a key gateway in the north of Bosnia. Czech soldiers patrol the volatile Serb-held region around Banja Luka. Hungarian forces have drawn .,Derailed by Munitions. Dispute less prickly duty with an engineering unit of the international peace- By Charles Trueheart ment" to move past the sensitive missioning before May 22, 2000, keeping mission here - small comfort for this "new NATO member THE WASHINGTON POST issue of arms decommissioning. the main Protestant faction, the that suddenly finds itself on the front line of the Yugoslav conflict.

J' HILLSBOROUGH, NORTHERN IRELAND, The dispute has become a ful- Ulster Unionist Party, has made a Poland, Hungary and the Czech Republic courted membership in I, Efforts to defuse the most seri- crum for lingering sectarian mistrust, token delivery of IRA "hardware" a NATO with fervor during the first years of freedom from the rival ous menace yet to the year-old after 30 years of terror and blood- condition for participating in Warsaw Pact and the Soviet Union's tether. Northern Ireland peace accord were shed here, and it has threatened to Northern Ireland's new cabinet But only days after their induction into the world's most powerful put on hold Thursday after the two scuttle the establishment of power- alongside representatives of Sinn military bloc, the three Eastern European states, which also serve as sides failed to reach agreement on sharing between Northern Ireland's Fein, the outlawed IRA's legal part of the international peacekeeping force here, find themselves how and when to dispose of para- Protestant majority and Catholic political wing. exposed to the wrath of Serbs in Bosnia-Herzegovina and vulnerable military arms and munitions. minority. The Ulster Unionist Party won to Yugoslav retaliation for their guilt-by-association in NATO's bom-

I,: After three days of intensive The Irish Republican Army, the the largest share of seats in the bardments. negotiations before the Easter week- mainly Catholic paramilitary group Northern Ireland Assembly, and its The launch of the alliance's campaign against Yugoslavia - mere end deadline, the stymied process of that has been fighting to end British leader, David Trimble, has been hours after U.S. ceremonies to welcome the three new members to salvaging the 1998 Good Friday rule in Northern Ireland, has refused designated the first minister, the top NATO - has undermined political and popular support for the peace agreement was suspended a Protestant demand that it begin official under the new home rule Balkan actions in those countries. And it has raised doubts about the until April 13. surrendering its arsenal of weapons arrangement. wisdom of putting the stability of fragile new democracies at risk for British Prim'e Minister Tony as a sign of its commitment to the Both Trimble and Sinn Fein the right to share shelter behind NATO's shield. Blair called the suspension "a pause Good Friday accords. leader Gerry Adams expressed dis- , for reflection" and declared the Although the April 11, 1998, appointment at the outcome of the sides already had a "basis for agree- .agreement does not require decom- talks. Undergraduate Association .~ 1111I11 MIT's Undergraduate Student Government ...its back! Weave your class colors ,into the MIT Loom Stop by Lobby 7 Mon ay -- Tuesday- Jar Wars . Thursday to score points towards a study break for Wednesday- Hack Trivia your class Thursday- Wear your PJs to school and down a cup-a-J oe for pt Friday - field day in Kresge Oval 4 attle of' the Classes '99 Brought to you by the UA Committee on Student Life and your class councils Page 4 THE TECH April 2, 1999

OPINION ~.' Letters To The Editor Holocaust in Kosovo without explanation while the people inside in by this student group proclaiming, "we screamed for help. want our families and all the people of the In directing its letter ["Stop the Bombing," Over the years, we have seen what Balkans to live in peace." Perhaps this is so " Mar. 30] to "all people of good will," the MIT Slobodan Milosevic is capable of doing to because it was not Serbian lives that were so Chairman Organization of Serbian Students was perhaps innocent people, and that if something is not Josh Bittker '99 callously being taken from this earth, but mistaken in its choice of words. It might have done to stop him, he will do it. I compare him Bosnian and today Kosovar Albanian. Editor in Chief been more appropriate to address "all' people to Hitler as a man who does not understand As NATO bombs Serbian territory in an : Zareena Hussain '00 who want to revisit the holocaust." I say this words but only deeds. Although I do not con- attempt to avert a humanitarian disaster it failed Business Mana~er because that is really what is happening in done the double standards of certain North to prevent five years ago, Serbian students now Joey DieckhansOO Kosovo. I have heard reliable reports of men Atlantic Treaty Organization members with write to ask for prayers "for our families and all ." being systematically executed, of houses regards to their foreign policy, something has the innocent people suffering from this cam- Managing Editor being shelled and burned, and of men, women to be done to keep Milosevic in check. paign!" Is Serbian life, as the timing of this call Ryan Ochylski '0 I and children being forced out of their homes I realize that NATO air strikes put civilian for peace suggests, more important than other Executive Editor and ordered to flee to neighboring countries. I installations and more importantly, Serbian life? I think not. But perhaps in the eyes of the . Douglas E. Heimburger '00 also watched disturbing coverage (reminiscent citizens at risk - destruction does not come members of the Organization of Serbian of scenes from Schindler's List) of a train full without such risks. But Milosevic does not Students it is; for clearly their concern for the .\'EH'S ST.IFF of ethnic Albanians hoping to escape persecu- seem to believe that the lives of his people are plight of other innocent people who suffered in Editors: Frank Dabek '00. Susan tion in Kosovo, arrive at the Macedonian bor- valuable enough for him to make concessions the Balkans before last week was not great ...-- Buchman '0 I, Jennifer Chung '0 I. Krista der. Police surrounded the train, its doors and reach a peace deal. In the years I have enough to warrant a call for prayers. L. Niece '0 I; Associate Editors: Rima were locked, and it was sent back to Kosovo been at MIT, I never once read an article sent Ahmed Bererhi '99 Arnaout '02, Sanjay Basu '02, Neena S. Kadaba '02, Kristen Landino '02, Kevin R. Lang '02, Karen E. Robinson '02; Staff: Shawdee Eshghi '99, Jean K. Lee' 99, Eric Sit '99. Anna K. Benefiel '00, Adam Brown '00, Dudley Lamming '00, Katie Jeffreys '0 I. Laura McGrath Moulton '0 I, Jane Yoo '0 I. Gitrada Arjara '02, Steve I-Iobennan '02, Alex lanculescu '02, Payal Kohli '02. Priya Prahalad '02. Michael M. Torrice '02; :\Ieteorologists: Michael C. Morgan PhD '95, Greg Lawson G, Bill Ramstrom G. Gerard Roe G, Chris E. Forest, Marek Zebrowski.

I'lwnu 'IW.\' .\'I:-'I-'F Editor: Brett Altschul '99; Associate Editors: Ian Lai '02, Agnes Borszeki; Staff: Erica S. Pfister '00.

()/'/\1() \ .\'1: "T Editors: Michael J. Ring '0 I, Naveen Sunkavally '0 I; Columnists: Julia C. Lipman '99, Eric J. Plosky '99, Elaine Y. Wan '0 I. Veena Thomas '02, Kris Schnee '02; Staff: Wesley T. Chan '00, Dawen Choy '00. Seth Bisen-Hersh '0 I, Andrew J. Kim '01, Jeff Roberts '02.

SPORrs ST.,IFF Editor: Shao-Fei Moy '98.

AR 1:\'srAfT Editors: Joel M. Rosenberg '99, Satwiksai Seshasai '0 I; Associate Editors: Vladimir V. Zelevinsky '95. Bence P. Olveczky G; Staff: Daniel Metz G. Steven R. L. Millman G, Roy Rodenstein G, Teresa Huang '97. David V. Rodriguez '97, Mark Huang '99, Kate Samrandvedhya '00, Fred Choi '02, Daniel J. Katz.

1'1/0 TOG RA 1'1/ r STAFF Editors: Gregory F. Kuhnen '00, Rebecca Loh '0 I, Annie S. Choi; Associate Editors: Garry R. Maskaly '00, Karlene Rosera '00, Ajai Bharadwaj '0 I; Staff: Rich Fletcher G, Aaron Isaksen G, Wan Yusof Wan Morshidi G, Thomas E. Murphy G, Michelle Povinelli G. Arifur Rahman G, T. Luke Young G. Krzysztof Gajos '99, Connie C. Lu '00. Chun Hua Zheng '00, Ying Lee '0 I, Rebecca Hitchcock '02, Ming-Tai Huh '02, Angela Piau '02, Yi Xie '02, Lucy Yang '02, Miodrag CirkoviC.

Ft..., 1VRHS SlAFF Cartoonists: Solar Olugebefola '99, Jessica WU '99, Jennifer Dimase '01, Xixi D'Moon '01; Staff: Shawdee Eshghi '99, Jean K. Lee '99, Andrew J. Maywah '99 Aaron D. Mihalik '02.

BUSINESS STAFF Associate Advertising Managers: Jasmine Richards '02, Huanne T. Thomas '02; Staff: Karen Cheng '02.

rECI/NOLOer STAFF Director: Shantonu Sen '02; Staff: Hoe- Teck Wee '02.

E/J/TORS AT I..ARCH Contributing Editors: Jennifer Lane G, Dan McGuire '99; Color Editor: Gabor Csanyi G; Senior Editor: May K. Tse '99.

ADVISORr BOARD V. Michael Bove '83, Robert E. Malch- man '85, Thomas T. Huang '86, Jonathan Letters and cartoons must bear the authors' signatures, address- Richmond Pho '91, Reuven M. Lerner '92, Opinion Policy es, and phone numbers. Unsigned letters will not be accepted. No let- Josh Hartmann '93, Jeremy Hylton '94, Editorials are the official opinion 'of The Tech. They are written ter or cartoon will be printed anonymously without the express prior Garlen C. Leung '95, Thomas R. Karlo '97, by the editorial board, which consists of the chairman, editor in Saul Blumenthal '98, Indranath Neogy '98. approval of The Tech. The Tech reserves the right to edit or condense chief, managing editor, news editors, and opinion editors. letters; shorter letters will be given higher priority. Once submitted, PRODUCT/ON STAFF FOR TIllS ISSUE Dissents are the opinions of the signed members of the editorial all letters become property of The Tech, and will not be returned. 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Box copy submissions may be addressed to The Tech, P.O. Box 397029, easiest way to reach any member of our staff, If you are unsure who 397029. Cambridge. Mass. 02139-7029. Telephone: (617) to contact, send mail to [email protected], and it will be 253-1541. editorial; (617) 258-8324. business; (617) 258- Cambridge, Mass. 02139-7029, or sent by interdepartmental mail to "I 8226. facsimile. Ad,'ertising. 5ub5cription. and typesetting Room W20-483. All submissions are due by 4:30 p.m. two days directed to the appropriate person. The Tech can be found on the ". rate5 a,'ailable. Entire contents 0 1999 The Tech. Printed on recycled paper by Ma.uWeb Printing Co. before the date of publication. World-Wide Web at http://the-tech.mit.edu. April 2, 1999 OPINION THE TECH Page 5 Get Tough or Get Out Don't Let \ NATO Must Risk,an EscalatedKosovo Campaign or Halt Air Strikes Stress . destroy Milosevic' s army in the reliable sion." (Translation: nothing) . Kris Schnee way, with guns and tanks. But Serbia is not We are involved in a civil war, not just a Iraq - its .military is formidable, and its one-sided assault on civilians. Nor will the Hit You Today, the North Atlantic Treaty mountainous terrain perilous' to invading Serbians listen to reason and be nice, as Organization continues its airstrikes against armies. In a war we may have thousands of Clinton seems to hope. The Serbian people the .Serbian military in Kosovo, with the aim deaths on our side alone - unless Russia seem to be strongly behind their "democrati- Veena Thomas of crippling President Milosevic' s ability to and China object strongly enough to our cally-elected" leader and seem to support his wage a campaign of "ethnic cleansing" actions, in which case we will have another vicious crusade. Kosovo is considered a I was unbelievably stressed out the Tuesday , against Kosovo' s ethnic Albanian population. world war. "holy land" for the Serbs, who are obviously before spring break. Originally, I had a 5.60 Over 500,000 refugees already have fled from Even assuming that we don't mind the willing to shed as much blood as necessary exam, an 8.02 exam, and an 18.03 exam all their homes, and Serbian troops advance casualties - although even one dead soldier to control it. Are we willing to take sides in scheduled for Wednesday, March 17. Because while United States-led warplanes struggle may provoke public outrage - a ground war this hellish conflict, and then - even if we of numerous complaints, the 5.60 exam was with both the enemy army and the Serbian air is simply impractical. Unlike the Middle East, win - to keep troops there, to restrain 10 rescheduled for the night of the 16th. I wasn't defense system. the Kosovo area does not offer easy access for million zealous Serbians for the indefinite sure if this was a blessing or a curse. I no longer So, now what? future? had three exams on the same day, but now I had The bombing continues, but will it do any There is another strategy available, though one less day to study for 5.60. . good? So far, not much seems to have been most people will dislike it. Instead of using So the 16th found me in my dorm room, accomplished. The air defense system is dam- VJk are involved in a civil war, ground troops, we could take the war to the frantically studying. I tried to eat lun<:h as I aged but still dangerous; we have already lost Serbian people themselves. Shift the bombers' looked over 5.60, but I was too stressed to even one very valuable stealth fighter, and, even not just a one-sided assault on targets, and destroy the civilians' power plants chew. Three tests in two days were more than I .' worse, Alnerican soldiers have already been and factories. We can send the message that could handle. My dad called somewhere in the captured and paraded on television. civilians. -Nor will the Serbians people who act like savages will not be middle of my stress/study session. I could hard- Meanwhile, we have not yet succeeded in listen to reason and be nice, as allowed the tools of modern civilization. ly decide if I was glad he called to provide a • stopping the oppression of the Kosovar Denying electricity and hot water to the joy- much-needed break, or if the phone call would Albanians. In a few more weeks, it may be Clinton seems to hope. ous Serbs who danced on our crashed jet's just cut into my study time. He told me that he over - if Milosevic' s army is not completely wings last weekend may actually dampen had called to see how I was doing with study-

I destroyed, it will finish its job and get rid of their nationalistic pride, while killing their ing. I realized how glad I was to talk to him, ., the other fe:w million "undesirables" in the soldiers will only help it. We would have to and I told him how I was feeling. He reassured Kosovo province. foreign powers; it would be slow and difficult use this strategy immediately, if it is to work me that I should just try my best, and that if I Our current air-only campaign against mil- even to bring a full army near Serbia. There is at all. dido't do so well, life would go on, and that the , itary targets is a misguided half-measure. It already a smaller "peacekeeping" force wait- The present events in Kosovo are terrible, consequences weren't so bad. He reminded me will fail to stop Milosevic completely before ing nearby, but it is questionable whether its and Milosevic is a villain. But there is not that as a freshman, all I had to do was pass. His the "cleansing" is finished. We may be spend- mission can be changed to actual assault. much we can do about it. Unless we - words comforted me a little bit. But not totally ing vast amounts of money, and risking They can function well only if there is a peace America and the rest of NATO - are willing convinced, I set off to take the 5.60 exam. ~, American lives, on a military a~tion doomed agreement between Milosevic and the Kosovo to change our strategy and fight a real war I thought the 5.60 test went well, but I still to fail. Is there a better way to deal with this Liberation Army. We can not expect peace with terrible consequences, or make our point worried on my walk back. As I waited for the situation? from Milosevic except on his terms. He has clear by bombing cities, we probably cannot light to change so I could cross Mass. Ave., my One option would be to get tough at last, promised that if the NATO airstrikes cease, save the Kosovar Albanians from exile. If we mind was on both that test and the long night I and fight a war instead of half a war. Send his military will "start decreasing the presence lack the resolve to actually win the war, we had ahead of me, studying for the next two. I tens of thousands of ground troops into of a part of its forces in Kosovo who are there should go home now, and not waste any more looked around idly, but the road was almost Kosovo, and possibly the rest of Serbia, and for the purpose of defense against aggres- lives in futile combat. deserted. When I heard the familiar "bee-boo" signal, I started to cross the street, focused on the other side. I thought I heard some strange sound to the right of me. Luckily, I turned my Another Black Eye for Boxing head to see what it was. A white Jeep, about 20 ------ending the match in a draw and allowing the that this was perfectly fine with him. He gets feet away from me in the shoulder of the road, Jeff Roberts fighters to retain their original titles. Lewis did six months to correct the blunders he made in was reversing at full speed through the red light, everything he could to beat Holyfield, but he the first fight. The victim is Lennox Lewis, and it was headed straight towards me. Don King should be behind bars. The couldn't beat the conupt boxing world orga- who now has to win more fights to get the title world's top boxing promoter is, in my mind, nized by Don King. which he deserves to have right now. guilty of promoting nothing but the .bas- Yeah, I think that the outcome may have Of course, everyone knows that the real tardization of one of the world's oldest civi- been fixed. But why should I jump to conclu- victim is heavyweight boxing altogether. We I could have been killed. lized sports. Maybe, in the spirit 'of the sions? There are other expJanations for what all laiew that it was headed straight for the That could have been the end ... ancients, he should be thrown to the lions. Or, happened. The judges could have been intoxi- gutter after the cannibalistic madness cal.led .. in the spirit of our America, he could be tarred cated. If they weren't, then two of them were Tyson-Holyfield II. But the injury that while stressing about 1"ny exalns. and feathered and ridden out of Las Vegas on clearly watching some other fight. Judge Jean Holyfield faced at the teeth of Mike Tyson a rail. Of course, with that. hairdo, the tarring Williams said after the fight, "I don't care was nothing compared to the insult that That~ no uJay to die. and feathering probably wouldn't have any who the winner was; I s~ored by the blows Lewis faced at the words of the fight noticeable announcer. effect. ~ World clas.s Not even having time to think, 1 ran to Of course boxing has escape its collision course. When I somewhat I'm talking been taking safely reached the middle of the road, I turned about the repeated to observe the Jeep still reversing erratically ,- recent~ heavy- blows to the until it reached the light on the opposite side, weight cham- head, and which was still red. Unfortunately I was too pionship fight most of these shaken up' by the incident to take note of the between have been license plate number of the idiot who almost ran Lennox Lewis delivered by me over. I finished crossing the street as a few and Evander Don King, others and myself looked at each other in disbe- Holyfield. For the showman lief of what we had just seen. Someone said to those of 'you who's been me, "Wow, you were almost flattened." Too who didn't see turning it stunned to digest what really had just happened, it, let me sum- into a high- I kind of tried to make light of the situation, and marize. Lewis, class imita- agreed. But as I slowly walked to my dorm, the the World tion of the full implications of the event hit me (no pun Boxing World intended). I could have been seriously injured or Council cham- Wrestling killed. That could have been the end ... while pion, stepped Federation. crossing Mass. Ave. stressing about my exams. into the ring We were all That could have been it. My last thoughts con d it i"on ed, looking for- would have been about getting good grades on focused and ward to a my tests. That's no way to die. prepared to good heavy- Like everyone else, I had heard the stereo- become the weight fight, typical "make the most out of life" speech more first British. and we times than I can count. It's never rung so clear .. fighter of the didn't get as it did that night. I wasn't prepared to say century to win one. So now goodbye to the world that night, yet a few feet a unified we have to closer, a few seconds later, and that could have heavyweight watch it been the case. But is anyone ever prepared to ..(, title. Holyfield, again while say goodbye? For more than 18 years of exis- the International Boxing Federation and that connected," which is a perfectly reason- Don King makes more money and the rest of tence to have been taken away suddenly, at that World Boxing Association champion, ambled able way to score a fight. But this doesn't heavyweight boxing does nothing (consider moment, seems unthinkable. into the ring singing to himself, seemingly explain why she scored the fight for Holyfield, the upcoming Larry Holmes-George This whole incident was ironic because prepared to go to a night club. Of course, he who connected 228 fewer blows than Lewis. Foreman fight - sponsored by Weight there I was, upset about the work load and had nothing to worry about -according to his Larry O'Connell from Britain scored it a Watchers and Gold Bond Medicated how awful things were going and how version of the "truth," he was going to knock draw, despite his fear of criticism from British Powder). stressed out I was, when my life was almost Lewis out in the third round. The truth was fans. Of course it's honorable not to let one's People want to see better fights than this cut short. The one thing I was complaining that Holyfield planned on only fighting in the nationality influence the score of the fight. one, but they're not going to until King has about almost disappeared. Only a few hours third round, and he failed to even come close What should influence the score, however, is exhausted every cent out of it that he possibly before I had been worrying about entropy and to knocking Lewis down. The rest of the fight the quality by which the boxers fought. Call can. Many people don't care about boxing, enthalpy, but now I was upset at what could was a steady series of stiff jabs and lead rights me crazy, but that's what I think. I also think but there are still some of us who feel that have been the end. Academics are not worth connecting to Holyfield's head. The fight that whether the judges were mindless, drunk, boxers train very hard to do their job and stressing about to the degree that many others ended with Lewis having thrown 613 punches or rigged, the blame should fall directly into should be treated as sportsmen and not specta- and I have at times. Life is much too precious and landed 348, compared to Holyfield's 385 the overfed lap of Don King just for letting it cles. If King is going to take a few swings at to spend worrying about trivial details. If you thrown and 130 landed. For six of the twelve happen. boxing, it's about time boxing started hitting must stress, worry about whether or not you rounds, Holyfield landed fewer than 10 He's not suffering from this, though. He back. I'd personally like to see him go twelve are living your life to the fullest extent possi- punches per round. It was clear that Lewis had immediately began talking to both fighters rounds with Lewis, followed by twelve with ble. Life can be take!1 away at any moment, i, won - clear to everyone but the judges, who about promoting the rematch, which the IBF, Holyfield, and then maybe twelve with Mike prepared or not, and, in the words of Kansas, scored the fight 115-113 for Holyfield, 116- WBA, and WBC announced must happen Tyson. Now there's a fight that I'd promote "All your money won't another minute buy ... 113 for Lewis, and a 115-115 tie, respectively, within six months. Holyfield, obviously, said for free. all we are is dust in the wind." Page 6 THE TECH April 2, 1999

THE ARTS . * ON CAMPUS . Logarhythms , Oldgrowth andflowers infull bloom By Rupa Hattangadl asked to sing, the entire middle section of the audi- ncelebrationof its half century in exis- torium rose, and over 60 tence, the MIT Logarhythms performed a alumni joined the Logs in 50th Anniversary concert to a packed the front. Together, the Iaudience in 10-250 on March 13. The extended Logarhythms .... event included an excellent combination of, sang the oldtime favorite according to the program I got, "old growth" "Coney Island Baby" and (Log Alumni) and "flowers in full bloom" "Arise Ye Sons / Take me (their wives). A plethora of guest a cappella back to the Tech." The groups helped round out the evening and set incredible part was that the stage for the highly anticipated Logs per- there were Alumni repre- formance. senting all 50 years of the The Logs opened with the Beatles' song Logs. "It was the most ~. "All My Loving," and continued from rock incredible experience to show tlmes "Grease Lightning" and "Pinball meet the alumni and sing ~ Wizard," to "Life in a Nutshell" by the with them," says Kuo- T. LUKE YOUNG-THE TECH .~. Barenaked Ladies and Chris OeBurgh's Chiang Lian '00. "We had The Logs and alumni representing all fifty years of the group's existence conclude the concert with a "Lady in Red." The repertoire also included a reunion throughout the perfonnance of MIT's alma mater, Arise All Ye of MIT. Cream's "White Room," and Counting day, that involved singing, Crows' "Mr. Jones." The performance was looking at pictures and memorabilia, and a change from the uniform look the Alpha Phi Phlea Market. The Log Jam was a ..J punctuated by quite a number of soloists and activities for the Alumni." women's groups had. Their songs ranged memorable and successful night for these comical skits in between. There was also a Opening for the Logs were our very own from Toad the Wet Sprocket to the widely known singers. ' rendition called "Eine Kleine NOT Musick" Muses, followed by the Smith Noteables. This Backstreet Boys. The audience had as much The opportunity to be involved in the .... which was done very well, except for the all-female group had a very refreshing a cap- fun with the music as they did, since the show made the concert much more enj9yable small casualty that came about during the pro- pella sound. Their mix of songs both old and Xtension ~hords made every song a produc- for the crowd. Everyone had a great time lis- duction. "Krazy" Karl Erdmann '02 got hit in new was well done. tion instead of just a rendition of a familiar tening to the music and watching the antics the face by a wandering brass rat. "His head The Jackson Jills from Tufts were next. tune. And they had collectively mastered a and dramatic element put on. The combina- .... collided with my fist," said Seth Jacob Their intense sound and fun got the audience range from a soothing bass to a high coun- tion of groups from all over made for an Cooperman, the wearer of the Rat. "It was a involved. MIT men and women alike found tertenor . incredible night and left the audience with complete accident and would have been a lot their skit of the difference between the sexes The Chords were followed by another all- .warm feeling of tradition: . better for Karl had I not been wearing my to hit home pretty well. women group from California, the USC Michael Potash, an alum, helped organize [ring]." Karl came back quickly and joined the Next was the first of two groups that had Sirens, who had a fun and colorful sound. The the largest Log event ever. There was a 50th group again for the last few songs after taking travelled a long way. The Xtension Chords girl who did the vocal percussion was out- Anniversary commemoration T-Shirt made, a few minutes off. drove 18 hours from Illinois, and for their standing. This was the group's first tour. along with an anniversary CD, Long Load, Looking around the audience, it was mellow yet strong sound, I'd say it was The Logarhythms have been featured in that is available for sale. The Logs are not clear that there were more than just cument worth it. The Xtension Cords took the stage The Boston Globe and boston. com. They sellitig the CO yet, but they are available by MIT students there. As the alumni were dressed in jeans and all different shirts, quite perform four free concerts at MIT every . contacting Will Lee at year, and at other places in the entire New [email protected]. The T-shirts are England area, inCluding Boston University, available (both the traditional Logs shirt and Faneuil Hall, President Vest's house, and the new anniversary one) from the Logs Colby College. The group of thirteen has . ([email protected]). The shirts and their latest also performed at many campus charity release, Redwood, is also for "sale in Lobby events like Sigma Kappa Late Night and the I0 this week.

I•

The fledgling USC Sirens made their premier appearance on the East Coast.

ON CAMPUS T. LUKE YOUNG--.-THE TECH The MIT Logarhylhms 'Perform Elne Kleine NOTmuslk, a traditional oldie but gOOdie, In MIT Symphony Orchestra their 50th anniversary concert. in 0 Major was excellent. There were many well, although the group seemed to have dif- .. ' An evening of Ives and Mahler wonderful moments throughout all four of . ficulty keeping their concentration. And the movements, although the first two move- although there were no painfully. blatant By Fred Chol should have. The pauses in their first melody ments stand out in particular. The opening to mishaps, neither was there anything particu- STAFF REPORTER were disruptive instead of fully integrated, the first movement (Langsam. Schleppend. larly outstanding in the movement, with the ne can't help but admire the MIT the bow changes in accompanying figures Immer sehr gemachlich) bordered on the exception of excellent work done by the Symphony Orchestra for even were often awkward' and disconcerting, and sublime, with the strings quietly supporting oboe section. attempting to tackle such major even within long bow strokes there was not the woodwinds as they set the early morning For the last movement (Sturmich O works as Ives' and Mahler's First even the hint of legato. Also, in a majority scene. When the brass, playing offstage as bewegt), the Symphony re-collected them- Symphonies. These two are of such difficul- of the faster passages the strings lacked directed in the score, joined the established selves and began strongly, but either they ty that a professional orchestra could easily ensemble, causing these sections to be musical setting seamlessly, they played with lost steam or they were trying too hard to spend half a year working to prepare them murky. All of these contributed to the over- a wonderful warmth and certainty. The flute keep the work togethe.r by the time they for performance, and still not fully perfect all result that the majority of the first move- and clarinet "cuckoos" were lovely, and the reached the second section. From then on them. It is much to the credit of the conduc- ment felt disjointed and incoherent. opening cello melody was absolutely gor- the Symphony-began to have definite prob- tor, Dante Anzolini, that the Symphony's After this rough beginning, the Orchestra geous. The rest of the movement was simi- lems both in the full ensemble and within level of performance of the two works Mar. greatly improved. The introduction to the sec- larly controlled and impressive. The instrumental sections. Near the beginning 13 in Kresge Auditorium was commendably ond movement (Allegro) was excellent, with Symphony completely understood the struc- the violins' phrasing was very well-done, high. Although the concert was not flawless, the solo clarinet and the second violins play- ture of the rather mammoth movement and but then they ,failed to mesh well with the there were many fine moments that clearly ing with definite purpose. Here the Orchestra transitions between sections were oftentimes cello section, and later the strings and the displayed the skill of the group. began paying closer attention to Anzolini' s performed perfectly. The musicians were oboe section were likewise out of sync. The first section of the program was clear conducting, shaping each musical able to build up the music to wonderful lev- Once again the group had a strong sense of devoted to the first two movements from phrase under his guidance. As themes were els of excitement, sustain a quiet intensity, the structure and transitions were very Charles Ives' Symphony No. I in D minor. repeated in different sections, the articulation and convey real joy and jocularity with well-done, but too many times musicians However, it wasn't until well into the first and style were also matched, to great effect. apparent ease. buried themselves in their music and movement (Adagio molto sostenuto) that the The strings played more as a cooperative The second movement (Kraftig bewegt~ . ignored the clear directions from the con- Symphony Orchestra as a whole really group than they had in the first movement, doch nicht ze schnell) was filled with great ductor. began to show their true capabilities. The' and two often overlooked instruments, the energy and really showed off the capabilities The performances of the Symphony opening English horn solo was played with harp and the timpani, really shone. The of the Orchestra. The middle, quieter section received a good reaction from the audience in wonderful control and tone, supported nicely movement ended very strongly, highlighted felt a little unsure, but the return to the first attendance, and their praise was justly by the lower strings. However, further on, by powerful tremolo and unison sections. theme renewed the Symphony's sense of deserved. The group of extremely talented " ~ the strings, especially the upper strings, pre- For the most part, the MITSO' s perfor- control. The third movement (Feirlich und individual musicians worked together to pre- vented the movement from flowing as it mance of Gustav Mahler's Symphony No. I gemessen, ohne ze schleppen) was played sent a difficult, but highly enjoyable, program. .".1., .''':-., I ..... ,. THE ARTS THE TECH Page 7 MOVIE REVIEW ..Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels Not a stupid movie

By Francisco Delatorre seems new (True STAFF REPORTER Romance comes to Written and directed by Guy Ritchie mind, although Lock, With Jason Flemyng, De.xter Fletcher, Nick Stock is much better) . . Moran, and Jason Statham This admittedly simplis- tic premise is convolut- love accents, whether it's British, Scottish, ed with a multitude of Russian, Italian, German, or, for that mat- subplots whose relation- ter, anything else. I also like free stuff. So ship to each other is lost Ian ideal gift for me is something free that until very near the end. involves people with accents. Thus, when A fair amount of retro- .'~ LSC (Lecture Series Committee) had a free spective scrutiny is sneak preview of Lock, Stock, and Two needed to finally under- Smoking Barrels, I had to go. stand the story, but there And, in retrospect, I would pay full price is a wonderful feeling of to see this film, "I've got it!" at the end. The story is that of four petty criminals, The characters them- S. PEARSON who pool their "earnings" into a high stakes selves are rather lacking (Left to right) Eddy (Nick Moran), Soap (Dexter Fletcher), Bacon (Jason Statham), and Tom (Jason poker game. We soon find, though, that the in definition and motiva- Flemyng) share a pint and a laugh In the Guy Ritchie film Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels. game is rigged, and not even the card shark _tion, and only' one char- among them can save their hard-earned cash. acter (the father/enforcer) exhibits any sem- choice, and pacing of the dialogue - to standing visual and aural experience. Unfortunately, however, the amount they lose blance of depth .. reinforce our perceptions (anyone .who can Working with the music, perhaps driving it, ~ far exceeds the amount they have, and they However, the makeup of the film is clear- deliver the line "Besides, it's cheap!" with- or perhaps driven by it, is the outstanding are given one week to come up with the ly not dedicated tp formal excellence, and out a humorous context and still make the use of cuts, slow motion, still shots, and per- remaining money. Their plans to acquire the thus we must not analyze it as such. Make audience laugh deserves recognition). The spective. The use of the camera in Lock, ", cash clash significantly with the plans of vari- no mistake about it, this film is here to dialogue composition and pace are clearly Stock, and 2 Smoking Barrels seems unlike ous rival criminal groups, and our heroes find entertain, through its sharp dialogue, hilari- objective; what isn't told outright is the work of a skilled cameraman; it gives the themselves caught in the middle of a circle of ous situations; carefully chosen soundtrack, expressed in very succinct terms. Indeed, sense that the camera is living, changing its violent incompetence and ruthless bloodshed. and outstanding cinematography. Each char- much of this story is about the telling of sto- pace with the mood, adjusting focus and And it's funny! acter's strengths and weaknesses (especially ries. As a result, the dry method of speaking bearing to fit the environment. As Our Man To get the unpleasantries out of the way, weaknesses, given the film's tag line: "A and its contrast with both characters and walks away from the poker game, with "I the film did have weaknesses that any two-bit disgrace to criminals everywhere") are dis- visuals is highly enjoyable. Wanna Be Your Dog" blaring in his and our reviewer for a school newspaper can pick up played at the beginning of the film by an The eternally complicated story line, ears, the camera positions itself inches from on. First, a movie about tooth-and-nail crimi- external narrator and laid before us. After when viewed as a whole, has a sort of detri- his face, following every movement of his nals' following a bunch of small-time law- the formal introductions, we rely on their mental effect on the plot. Follow me here: head, focusing on his horrified but placid breakers who have' stolen their money hardly verbal interaction - vocal inflections, word our heroes buy guns stolen for a loan shark expression, with the environment behind to rob a group of toughies who him violently changing; it's quite a fantastic rob a group of pot growers who scene. I can't say enough about the camera- , grow the weed for another mob work and editing without saying too much, boss to whom our heroes are try- however, sol' II just say this: it is quite a ing to sell the stolen pot in order visually stunning ride, without using camera to payoff the loan shark that tricks and digital effects to excess. wanted to steal the guns in the Of course, as with all films about rivaling first place. And that's leaving o~t criminal elements and innocent fools caught half the cast. However, whe'n in the middle, the ending inevitably becomes viewed individually, the subplots (and I hesitate to use this term, for fear of a are extremely funny by them- film cri'tic mob stringing me up) a se Ives, and thus add to the film's Tarantinoesque bloodbath. But I particularly overall effect. It is this group of enjoyed the endless ending this film had, with hilarious subplots that may its multiple denouements and the resurgence detract from the plot, but they of the narrator we encountered in the begin- keep the viewer constantly guess- ning, and the very last moments produce one ing and add tremendously to the of the most enjoyable surprises found in a film film as a whole. in a long time. Also adding to the film is its Overall, I found it highly enjoyable. use of music. I remember very lit- Ignoring the elements that exhibit weaknesses tle of the original score, because regarding structure, depth, imd morality is a the only music. that sticks in my must for this film. Let's face it: this isn't the head is the impressive use of well- most original premise, and the method of assembled soundtrack. What is it masking this by adding innumerable subplots with the British and Iggy Pop? I've is somewhat confusing. The characters lack never been a big fan of the man, definition, and, of course, let us not forget that but rarely have I seen "I Wanna Be everyone in this movie is a criminal. And yet S. PEARSON Your Dog" used as well in a film. it is one of the most entertaining films I have (Left to right) Vinnie Jones discusses a scene with the film's writer and director Guy Ritchie on The music, coupled with the seen in 1999. And, naturally, any movie with the set of his film Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels~ cinematography, creates an out- Sting in it can't be all bad.

1~ soared, while Ransom was ly, his brother (Woody Harrelson), his broth- And then of course there's the acting. repugnant and exploi~ative - er's girlfriend (lenna Elfman), and his other Again, it's mostly just proficient, but two of with EdTV, Howard returns to friends and relatives, all change. the performers should be proud of their work his usual form. There are many directions where this story here. Both McConaughey and Elfman give Any other year, this would idea could have headed. We could have a bit- engagingly nuanced portrayals, which are not be a compliment; but in ing satire on the burgeoning fascination with even more surprising since they start the 1999, it is. With all worthwhile the institution of celebrity; we could have a movie as caricatures, portraying their ~harac- movies that one can catch now dark exploration of invasion into personal pri- ters in really wide brush-strokes, But by the being either holdover or. late vacy; we could have a rollicking farce, with end, they manage to completely fill their char-

t' releases, this year's slate is rep- the clever notion of live TV broadcast being a acters, and what's remarkable is that none of resented by such abominations direct influence on the events being transmit- these nuances contradict the wide-eyed lov- as She's All That and Analyze t~d. I guess, all of these ideas are present in able losers they were playing in the beginning. .. This. Therefore, it hardly comes ED tv, in some vague diluted shape or form . EDtv is certainly enjoyable to watch. Only «. as a shock that when a movie's But the movie doesn't really go for any of after the film is over, and one can think about only accomplishment is to make these. It is simply a feature-length sitcom. It it, several things come to mind which can no major creative blunders, it is even looks like one, with thoroughly unre- change one's opinion about it. At first, it's not By Vladimir Zelevlnsky automatically considered head and shoulders markable costumes and art direction. really in the same weight category as the first ASSOCIATE ARTS EDITOR above the usual multiplex dreck. There's not a And it's not a sharp-eyed, deconstruction- two millennial zeitgeist "TV is Life!" movies Directed by Ron Howard single aspect of the movie which is either alistic kind of a sjtcom, the way Pleasantville of last year, The Truman Show and Wriiten by Lowell Ganz and Babaloo Mandel memorable or original; on the other hand, was. This one is merely content to put its Pleasantville. There are some striking paral- Based on the screenplay "Louis 19, Ie Roi des thankfully, there's nothing groan-inducing characters through the relaxed paced of an lels between these three, mostly involving the Ondes" by Emile Gaudreault and Sylvie either. amusing comedy, with really nothing to climactic attempts of the characters to escape Bouchard EDtv is the story of a lovable lout Ed offend anyone (the only negatively portrayed being locked inside the boob tube. And, com- With Matthew McConaughey, Jenna Elfman, Pekurny (Matthew McConaughey), who is to character, a TV studio honcho played by Rob pared with those two, EDtv is weightless to Ellen DeGeneres,. Woody Harrelson, Martin be filmed 24 hours a day, seven days a week, Reiner, is a bare-bones caricature), and really the point of disappearance. Landau, Rob Reiner, Elizabeth Hurley for a reality-based show called True TV. "But nothing to say. Another problem is with the story. There's that's The Truman Show!", I hear you cry. Watching EDtv is not unpleasant; quite the no arguing that this film tries to show a con- 'Dtv leaves behind a better impression Well, no. Ed knows he's being filmed, not opposite, I had two solid hours of good time. trast between the bright and cheerful ambiance than the film, given its unoriginality, only because he gave his consent, but also Howard's direction is quite unremarkable, but of a TV show and the more somber feel of real probably should. EDtv director Ron because there's half a dozen sweaty guys run- he manages to stage a few good shots, mostly life; but the script, scene after scene after E Howard is first and foremost a skillful ning around him with TV cameras and boom involving creative cutting from the scene to scene, keeps returning to simplistically sitcom- Hollywood craftsman. With nary a flash of mikes. the same scene on a TV screen and back. like characters and conflicts. In a word, what brilliance, his movies invariably display their Very soon, Ed becomes a major celebrity, There are also a few relatively serious passes for Ed's private life feels so artificial solid workmanlike qualities. Albeit, his last with his cult status reaching country-wide pro- moments in the screenplay, some of which and scripted already, that it's very hard to two. films didn't fit this mold at all- Apollo portions. As such, his dealings with his fami- feel artificial, and some work. make a point of its superiority over TV. Page 8 THE TECH THE ARTS

CONCERT REVIEW also features an amusing mance, especially "Bra" and "The Only One cult to recognize true heartfelt candidness

analogy. Over a goofy Who Loves You," where the lyrics and even when it's sung directly to us from a # accompaniment reminiscent music were more immediate and thus more stage in a cafe, but the Mystery Band proved ' The Dan Emery of "Wild Thing", Espinola potent. Also, Dan Emery's practice of keep- in their performance that they are not only eloquently answers the well- ing the lyrics fluid by changing them slightly the real thing, but a talented group of musi- known question "If a tree as it suited his mood caused each song to feel cians as well. Their performance at the " falls in the forest and there's wonderfully spontaneous. Additions were Kendall Cafe showed The Dan Emery Mystery Band no one to hear, does it pro- welcome surprises as well, like the lyrics and Mystery Band playing their catchy, memo- duce a sound?" with the piano sound effect in "Bra" in which on top rable, feel-good, and honest-without-being- A liUlejar of mustard for the saul lines, "You're a tree in the of everything bad that had happened that day cheesy songs at their best, giving a much- J forest/and you just want to the knob for the hot water falls off while the improved and better-informed opinion of the By Fred Chol fall/But if you're not in the news/you didn't girl is trying to take a relaxing shower. band than came from being only acquainted STAFF REPORTER happen at all." There's also the alternate verse in "Student with their album. Although their concert was "I have one mission tonight," said the man Such amusing metaphors are one of the Loan" in which the narrator keeps trying to all too short, the audience (who was general- on the slightly elevated stage of the idiosyncratic strengths of the Mystery Band's get rid of his student loan mailings, even ly too interested in their drinks to give the cramped, dimly-lit cafe. "For you," he already catchy songs. In the same vein as going so far as to have NASA send them into band a chance to win them over) was not continued, stopping here to point direct- "Bra" and "Famous" are the tunes "Other . orbit. .ideal, and many people didn't even know.' ly at a random guy in the audience who People's Tongues," in which the narrator says But the highlight of the evening was the that they had missed the opportunity to hear looked completely bewildered, "for you I that even though he and his girlfriend have final song, "The Only One," played at the such a great band. For those who were pay- have one mission ... It is to entertain you." kissed many other people in previous rel~tion- request of an overly zealous audience mem- ing. attention, the Dan Emery Mystery Band And for those of us in the audience who ships, "That's okay, 'cause we brushed our ber. The band showed their desire to please, did more than succeed in entertaining us; were willing to shut up and listen, entertain us teeth," and "Little Jar of Mustard." The latter for although they protested the request at they won us over and made us fans. If you they did. The Dan Emery Mystery song is a unique mini-serenade in first by saying, "But we don't have .our were among those that missed them, don't Band, an up-and-coming band which the narrator begs the drummer!" they immediately shrugged off despair. You can pick up.their album, Love ~" from New York City whose object of his desire to their momentary reservations and performed and advertising at CDNow, Amazon.com, debut album Love and "Squeeze me, squeeze me, a stellar version of the song. and the Band's website at advertising has been squeeze me, 'cause I'm a In our cynical modem society it is diffi- http://aperock.home.mindspring.com/. recently reviewed by The little jar of mustard." He Tech, played their first alternates between such non-NYC gig at The declarations of affection, Kendall Cafe Friday, growing more emphatic March 12. Even without with pleas to "Squeeze a drummer, The Mystery me and spread me" and Band played their 10-song "Squeeze me, spread me, set with a passionate con- eat me," with insecure ques- viction, a tangible sense of tions of, "Do you like mus- honesty, and a general air of tard?" and "Are you allergic to good-natured humor that was absolute- mustard?" and finally, "Are you aller- ly engaging. Their songs range from quiet gic to me?" The song is so trivial yet so hilari- musings to honest conversation to raucous ously memorable that it stood out even among humor, all guaranteed to put you in a better all the other great performances of the night. mood. It's impossible not to mention at least in The Mystery Band eased into their reper- passing all five of the songs which regret- toire by opening with "Space Renegade," a tably do not appear on the Mystery Band's ballad from their album. Like their other slow- album but were performed. Along with er pieces, it tends to get overlooked in favor of "Famous" and "Mustard" were "Whoop-te- the more upbeat songs, but in performance it do," a gently lilting song about a former was completely stunning. Dan Emery's strong love, and the two irreverent songs, vocals, Brian Tully's solid bass-playing, and "Downloading Smut from the Internet" and the sounds Steve Espinola produced using a "Me Against the Assholes of the World." short-wave radio, all combined to convey per- "Smut" greatly increased the group's energy. . SHEILA FERRINI fectly the sense of loneliness, resignation, and and featured one of the band's best hooks, Bill Moatos (left) and John Kuntz as Richard Loeb and Nathan Leopold plot the murder • escape that the song relates. and "Assholes" was completely refreshing in ,of ~bby Franks In the Lyric Stage Company of Boston's production of John Logan's The opening song, great as it was, belied its honest confessions. Both were told in a Never the Sinner-The Leopold & Loeb Story currently running through April 18th• the fun and frolic that filled most of the tongue-in-cheek manner that let the audience evening. The band introduced the next song know that even though the group is unafraid THEATER REVIEW And the play, shockingly, with the comment, "This is famous," which to address topics that may be considered amazingly, unbelievably, turned out to be a bit of a joke because the taboo, the group never takes their r~bellion misses every single one of name of the song was "Famous." As in "Her against society too seriously. Never the Sinner these opportunities, squan- Favorite Bra," a song in which a male friend Perhaps it is no coincidence that the five dering dramatic actions, wishes he could help his female friend get songs taken from Love and advertising were Thetanot.1,. ~ t'IJI'fJenlO"l-Ft'l,. A C.untury char~cter insigh~, and even through her difficult times by being supportive among the best songs from the album. The Lt 1U51., fIUI U IUJ ~'fI the slffiple story m favor of, and "firm" and "strong" like a bra, "Famous" songs really benefited from live perfor- ~ By Vladimir Zelevlnsky oh, I don't know what. It comes as,no surprise ASSOCIATE ARTS EDITOR that the ,playwright John Logan has another Lyric Stage Company, 140 Clarendon St., career as a Hollywood screenwriter (with the MOVIE REVIEW expect is here: mint-green con- Boston yet unproduced Conqu!stador, Any Given vertibles, abandoned warehouses, Written by John Logan . Sunday, Mission: Impossible II to his credit). and a bouncy camera synchro- Directed by Spiro Veloudos His play operates in the way most Hollywood The Mod Squad nized to the groovy 70's sound With John Kuntz, Bill Mootos, Bill Humpreys, blockbusters do, with the scenes being so effects. Dale Place short and switching so r~pidly, that one is The young ensemble works More information available at 617-437-7172 readily reminded of the MTV-style editing. That70'sShow well together, the characters being Through 4/18 At its best, this is distracting; at its worst, By Roy Rodensteln gritty but cohesive when they need to. infuriating, when the play rapidly switches STAFF REPORTER Individually, they're not always as successful. ithout even exerting one's mind, gears just when it could have ~tayed with the 1999, 1 hr 31 min Omar Epps is so cool that sometimes he's it's easy to list at ieast half a scene for at least another minute and maybe Directed by Scott Silver frozen stiff, but otherwise he's usually right- dozen "trials of the century," run- gain a moment of insight. As a result, Never Written by Stephen T. Kay, Scott Silver, Kate on, whether exploding at Pete for crashing his W ning all the way from Ragtime's the Sinner reminded me of a hamster on its lit- Lanier "set o'wheels" or freaking out when a gang- shooting of architect Stamford White to, well, tle spinning wheel: there's an amazing flurry With Claire Danes. Omar Epps. Giovanni ster asks to dance with him. Claire Danes is you know what. Each of them seem to exist at of activity, with rapidly moving limbs all Ribisi, Dennis Farina. Josh Brolin apt but out of sync with the atmosphere at a nexus of multiple conflicts, money versus akimbo, and you know it's working very hard, times, whether it's because she looks more fame versus guilt versus whatever might be and moving very fast ii but moving very much hen you think of The Mod Squad, apathetic and annoyed than gritty, or maybe the current hot topic in the societal conscious- nowhere, and its gets highly annoying very what comes to mind? Many of us because she shows a bit more emotion than ness. soon. have vague recollections about the plot's frail frame can sustain. Maybe it's The Leopold & Loeb trial (Chicago, 1924) First act is mostly disappointing, with only W this 70's show, which was pro- that 90's-70's connection again. was certainly one of them. Two rich young one thing really happening: the murder itself, duced in part by Aaron Spelling, just the 8th As for the coppers, Dennis Farina and men, from affluent families, plqt a perfect a graphically disturbing scene. Everything of his 123 (so far) producer stints, and ran Richard Jenkins could probably do these roles crime. They kidnap and brutally kill a little else is lost in a flurry of two-minute scenes. from 1968 to 1973. The Mod Squad the movie in their sleep. The script tries to actually make boy, without really any reason to do so. They Second act, picks some things up, by at least has the 70's sensibilities down pat. Of course, them do that, but Jenkins in particular still make an idiotic mistake and are caught and hearkening to the Playwrighting 101 class and the catch is that a large portion of these sensi- manages some agitated zing, as he did in promptly charged with murder. They are creating some kind of dramatic conflict, bilities is indistinguishable from those of the Flirting with Disaster. Brolin has perhaps the defended by none other than famous Clarence between the attorney Darrow and state prose- 90's. Indeed, a well-known clothing manufac- most one-dimensional character, whose screen Darrow, who would later go on to defend cutor Crowe. These scenes have some zing to turer is promoting clothes based on the movie. time consists almost exclusively of fake smil- schoolteacher Spokes in the notorious "Bible them; but by this time, it's too little, too late, The other catch is that The Mod Squad ing. vs. Darwin" case. The case is a tangle of and the second act generally feels soporific. achieves a TV-show feel all too successfully, It's Giovanni Ribisi who walks away with issues. There's the fact that Darrow knew of I can't even imagine how. bad Never the and looks flimsy on the big screen. the movie; even his name is probably more his clients' guilt, and still defended them, Sinner would feel if it were poorly staged. At Sporting a game cast, The Mod Squad is interesting than most characters, and his per- being a staunch opponent of the death penalty. least, the Lyric Stage production works extra- the story of three youngsters caught by the formance is non-stop entertainment. There are There's the mystery of why two handsome hard to make the audience ignore the play's police who are given a second chance by actually many laughs in this movie, and they and rich men went for a base crime. There's a faults. Both the direction and acting are .just Capt. Greer (Dennis Farina) if they agree to are all earned by Ribisi. From his growling homosexual romance between the two. right, interesting enough but not too much so go undercover for him. Claire Danes plays match with a dog (which is painted on the There's a curious involvement of popular phi- as to distract from the other aspects of the pro- Julie Barnes, a strong-willed girl who still wall) at the beginning of the movie, to his losophy, most significantly Nietsche. And, of ductions. Most impressive are the lighting sometimes loses control of her emotions. clown-like facial contortions both when show- course, there's the clash of characters, driven design (which evocatively creates the mood of Omar Epps is Linc Hayes, a smooth operator ing earnest and put-on emotion, he keeps the state prosecutor Robert Crowe versus Darrow many changing setting which are all done who's in for arson and, of the three, he's usu- movie from dragging. Having held his own i_n versus his clients. without any changes in the set) and sound ally the one with the brains. Finally, Mr. Saving Private Ryan, it's apparent that Ribisi There are many directions one can take design. The latter is very interesting, with Charisma, Giovanni Ribisi, is Pete Cochran, has great dramatic and comedic range. this play. One can go for a riveting courtroom such effects as the seamless fade of period the rebel with a heart of gold. There's not much more to The Mod Squad. drama; or maybe a twisted romance; or, per- music from the house speakers to the small If the descriptions of the principals sound If you're looking for some 70's grooves, an haps, for a harrowing character study; or for a radio on the set. like they are cut out of cardboard, the antago- explosion or two, and some amusing perfor- period piece, using the 1924 milieu as a sepa- Too bad, really; such a story (true, as most nists are cut out of single-sheet tissue paper. mances, you will enjoy this movie as much as rate characters; or, ultimately, as a somber great stories are) would merit a better stage The plot concerns dance clubs, cars, guns, and 'I did. Just don't go in expecting any kind of look at the sources of fascism, with Leopold version. What Never the Sinner is most mem- drugs. Major drug deals are afoot, and some plot or character development that you & Loeb attempting to achieve the status of orable for, is its spectacular squandering of cops might be crooked. Everything you would wouldn't see in an episode ofa 70's TV show. Nietschean supermen by the means of murder. opportunities. April2, 1999 THE ARTS TH~ TE~H .page 9

RESTAURANT REVIEW And Royal India is so in touch with customer needs that you don't even have to ·Royal India worry about missing your meal. It will be there when you return. Maybe. Freshfoodfrom India -literally Now, the weak and tired By Satwlksal Seshasal of the bunch may not be up to walking across ARTS EDI1V/f the street. Especially after a day of skiing in

\ , any s~dent groups at MIT enjoy an Killington, Vermont. For this select group, annual trek up north to Talbot The Tech recommends another strategy. Enter House in Vermont for a weekend of the restaurant with half your group and place Mrest, relaxation and perhaps even your order. Have the other half of the group good food. The surrounding area offers a great enter a half hour later. Have them order what variety of options for the h~ngry student you really want to eat. It will arrive, without group, but as The Tech learned this past fail, hours before your food is even killed. Saturday, you can't trust every cheap Indian Being the skilled investigative journalist team restaurant in the middle of nowhere. that we are, The Tech spent the night confirm- Our search for a dining location began at 6 ing this theory many times. p.m. with a drive through lovely Woodstock, Although it's perfectly acceptable to take a Vermont. After leaving Woodstock for the nap as your food is prepared (there will surely majesty of West Lebanon, New Hampshire, be time), be sure to wake up when your food almost an hour and a half later we converged is served. You will learn that Royal India has upon Royal India, reminiscent of the Central perfected a complex algorithm for serving GABOR CSANY/-TIIE TECH Square Indian places we have grown to love. food. The Tech has not managed to understand Royal India, located In West Lebanon, New Hampshire. The Christmas lights in the window immedi- the basis for this algorithm, but we will pre- ately transported us to the subcontinent, as we sent it to the MIT community, as this is proba- rested in the plush seats and anticipated a bly the only place in the world where such an the rate of one item per 15 minutes. Spread it India. This wrath may also be encountered if quick tasty' traditionallndian meal. algorithm can be derived. And more impor- out so that every member of every table has you proceed to convince entering couples Boy were we wrong. tantly, successfully implemented. the opportunity to smell every dish that you from eating at this restaurant. The Tech decid- A few members of our group decided to First, take customer orders. Next, toss them offer, in hopes that they will change their mind ed to endure this wrath as a gesture of good- pass the time as we waited for our food with a up in the air. This may lose some of them, but and walk out of the restaurant (which will, will, and spent part of our waiting period strategy that we now recommend to every stu- by the time they get their food, they wont again, increase your efficiency). If a table has a warning others from entering the restaurant. dent group that decides to eat at the fancy remember. By losing a couple orders you will greater women-men ratio, it must be served One final jewel of the Royal India is that Royal India. After placing your order, we rec- dramatically increase your efficiency. The first. You may notice that chicken pakora can there's no need to bring gum: every table offers commend that you get up, put your coat on, tossing action also allows you' to sufficiently act as the rate limiting step, but disregard this. a complimentary piece for each patron. You'll walk across the street to the local Friendly's randomize the orders to guarantee that just It only decreases your efficiency. And at Royal have to check underneath to locate it. If you and eat dinner. Now, this may seem like an because a customer may have placed an order India, efficiency is everything. need to spit it out, feel free to use the odd way to pass time while waiting to be far in advance of another, they are not guaran- If you understand that food serving algo- restrooms, because that's about all you can do served at a restaurant, but believe us: it works! teed to get their food first. Then, serve food 'at rithm, you may be able to maximize your back there. Royal India has a strict policy enjoyment of Royal India's food. A couple against toilet paper, working flushes, hot water members of our group suggest another way to and paper towels. It's all about efficiency, maximize enjoyment at Royal India. Step baby. One: Wake up at 5 'a.m. Eat a croissant. Step Now, The Tech would never find it suffi- Two: Don't eat a damn thing for the rest of cient to just complain about a problem the day, but instead spend the day skiing at the involving poor dining service without offer- Killington Ski Resort. Step Three: Drive to ing a substantial solution. We noticed that Royal India, after first confirming that every the real problem with the restaurant was other-restaurant in the neighborhood is full. that it simply could not handle a situation Step Four: Eat Royal Indian food. Feel like a where all of its tables were filled. Also, as King. Burger King, that is, because you will we waited for our food, Royal India did still be hungry. their best to keep us from falling asleep The food at Royal India comes close to with their ear piercing selection of Indian authentic Indian cuisine. In an apparent effort music hits. Our solution? A dance floor. to demonstrate that they travel all the way to Royal India should remove the tables in the India to produce your meal, the food arrives center of the restaurant and make way for a

i cold, partially t?aten and without utensils. One hip new exciting dance floor. They can also Tech staffer described the chicken as "gritty, remove the 'kitchen since they obviously with insane spices." Tests also revealed that a don't use it. Everyone who's anyone in Frosty from the nearby Wendy's can effec- West Lebanon would flock to Royal India. tively reduce chicken-induced swelling of the But, they wouldn't be there to eat; they'd mouth and throat. As a true tourist of India, arrive to dance! Then the Royal India chef you must start conserving water as soon as can go back to doing what he does best: you arrive, because water stops flowing at sleep. 7:30 p.m., regardless of whether or not your Tipping 'is not necessary and offering a 0 food has arrived. And of course, they wont tell percent tip will more than compensate for the you this. service provided by Mr. Royal India. l ~.. ' If your meal is not sufficient, do not hesi- Whatever you offer, he will be sure to yell as tate to get up and help yourself to the unfin- . you run out the door: "Thank You. Come ished portions of another tal?le's meal. I did. Again." We don't think so. This is a form of survival at the Royal India. Josh Bittker. Agnes Borszeki, Annie Choi, Just be sure not to yell "Hey Josh, the good Gabor Csanyi, Aaron Isaksen, Greg Kuhnen, stuff's down here, baby" across the restaurant Kevin Lang, Garry Maskaly, Karlene Rosera unless you are prepared to face the wrath of and Shantonu Sen contributed to the reporting of this story . {., ..the one Indian man that works at the Royal MUSIC REVIEW which actually have something to them. There's solid guitar work all over this album, ranging from the Sponge jangly arpeggios that echo over "My Lackluster Love" to the searing riff in,"Pollyanna," which brings back A More Polished Resmrection memories of "Plowed" with a By Daniel J. Katz reduced tempo. Sponge has always seemed STAFF REPORTER most comfortable working in two realms: laid- or every Cinderella story of a band that back pop and driving cut-time rock. Both are toils on' independent label after inde- present on the new album. The first is most pendent label, there's the polar oppo- clearly manifested in the first single, "Live t' site: the band with a rapidly selling Here Without You," an innocent song which F will grow on you incessantly. The latter rears debut album but followups that just don't catch on. Most of these artists are never heard its head in my favorite track by far, "1000 from again, but there are a few exceptions. Times," which combines a great melody with "«. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you New Pop an ominous guitar line and an unrelenting Sunday (Lookout), an indie album from none beat. With a large Qife, slice across ~inach bunches to separate leaves from stems. Swish other than Sponge. I'm also quite partial to "When You're On leaves well in .._ filled with'cold water, lifting them out to leave the dirt behind; drain Sponge is a band whose hit singles are far Fire, Baby, Roll," the heaviest track on the. and refill Sink aDd rc;peat washing if necessary . Weigh out 3/4 pound leaves; reserve the more famous for their choruses than their real album, which unconsciously captures the rest for Salad or another use. Put the spinach leaves in a l2-inch skillet with just the water names. (I challenge you to find someone who band's desire to be the Reverend Horton Heat. clinging to tIMm Cover and cook over moderate heat lDltilleaves are just wilted, about 3 can tell you what "Molly" or "Plowed" sound "Radio Prayer Line" is a speedy number with minutes, tossing once or twice with tongs so leaves wilt evenly. Transfer wilted leaves to a like, until you say "sixteen candles down the a oddly discomforting riff that pops up every sieve and place under cold running water until cool Drain wen and squeeze betWeen your drain" or "a world of human wreckage," at now and then to surprise you. The gradual hands to remove excess water. The spinach does not need to be thoroughly dry. which point they will sing the entire song.) layering of guitar parts in "All American Melt butter ina aman sldl1et over low heal Add garlic and saute one minute to release its Their second album, Wax Ecstatic, revealed a World" showcases the band's more extensive ftagrance. Put spinach, garlic and butter in food processor and process to chop. Add ricotta much darker sound, more variety of genres, use of effects (which is evident throughout the and process until smooth, stopping machine to scrape down sides of bowl once or twi<:e. and one of the best slide guitar riffs of all time album). Transfer to a bowl. Stir in II2'cup Parmesan and season generously with salt and pepper. in the title track. New Pop Sunday has the hooks and consis- Cook pasta in a large pot of boiling salted water until al dente. Drain, reserving I cup New Pop Sunday assembles the best ele- tency that kept Wax Ecstatic from being a water. Transfer to a large warm bowl. Add as much of the sauce as you like and toss to ments of both previous albums, incorporating classic album, but it delves far deeper than eat, adding reserved water as necessary to thin the sauce. Serve pasta immediately in the bright guitar sound that defined Rotting Rotting Pinata. It's sadly ironic that Sponge warm dishes and pass additional Parmesan at the table. Serves 4. The left over sauce /f;nata with the more sophisticated and fore- has finally found its stride at the depths of its '.' tastes great'on toasted bread! boding songwriting found on Wax Ecstatic. popularity. Hopefully, Lookout can give them The result is a collection of songs that grab some good publicity, and they'll be back on the listener like Sponge's pop singles, but the radio whe~e they now legitimately belong. Page 10 THE TECH THE ARTS April 2, 1999

the clock reality-based TV show. It's pleasant, for a This is an offbeat comedy, an offbeat buddy film, an change, to see a movie which is done competently: offbeat romance, and an offbeat revenge story. Or Ron Howard's direction is smooth, and some act- none of these things. Mix up some wildly varying ing, especially that of the leads, is very proficient. comic elements, combine them with some of most But the bland story keeps spinning its sitcom deliciously deadpan acting in recent memory, add wheels, ultimately forgetting that it originally set highly imaginative and inventive usage of 1 . out to satirize cheap entertainment. - VZ widescreen format - and get Rushmore, which is just about the least conventional and yet solidly Elizabeth (***) enjoyable movie to come out recently. -VZ A remarkable visual achievement, this story about one of the greatest rulers of England ever is Saving Private Ryan (**V2) ." told by withholding the epic scope and concentrat- For all the sound and fury unleashed by Steven ing. on the essential de.tails. The great cast, head- Spielberg in this WWII action drama, the result sig- lined by Cate Blanchett in a commanding titular nifies more or less nothing. Other than two majestic performance and ably supported by Geoffrey Rush battle sequences (first half and hour and last half an as her chief assistant, works extra hard to create hour), which have taut pacing, amazing visuals, and vivid characters from the rather overwritten and taut direction, the rest is lackluster. The story doesn't overplotted screenplay. The finale, with ethereal build toward much, the few character arcs' are either music by Mozart, is stunning. - VZ barely existent or utterly obvious, and the acting is passable at best. It's certainly highly watchable, but The following movies are playing this weekend at using the turn of the seasons as an underlying plot- God Said "Ha!" (***> even this is somewhat of a problem, since it turns the local theaters. The Tech suggests using line and carefully observed animals as central char- A single extended monologue by Julia Sweeney, horrors of war into exciting spectacle. ~VZ http://www.boston.comfora complete listing of acters. Unexpectedly, it's also downright hilarious, formerly know as Pat on Saturday Night Live, it is a times and locations. bursting with more humor than any other movie story of one year of her life when everything seems Shakespeare in Love (***1/2) currently in release. -Vladimir Zelevinsky to be going wrong in the worst possible way. And What a difference does a good screenplay make! **** Excellent yet, the movie alternatively hilarious and poingnant, This one, co-written by Tom Stoppard, is funny, *** Good Analyze This (**) ** Fair A sorry sit-comish * Poor excuse for a comedy, with Billy Crystal 200 Cigarettes (**) engaging in so much An opulent, stylish look at 80's stereotypes, the tiresome shtick as a rather weak tale of a group of twentysomethings cop- burned-out shrink, ana- ing with life and their own personal demons on New lyzing an overstressed Year's Eve is not a particularly well thought out story, mafia boss played by but a rather well implemented one. Definitely worth Robert De Niro. Not seeing the ensemble cast (including such names as enough humor, not Christina Ricci, Ben and Casey Affleck. and Martha enough story, and more ... Plimpton) playa group of neurotic and pathetically than enough gratuitous 1 humorous individuals searching for a way to enjoy violence. However, De themselves for an evening and not worry about any- Niro, in a rare comedic thing the depressing implications of the year to come. appearance, almost A movie that takes place in the 1981, but whose makes this movie worth actual 80's influence draws from the entire decade. watching. - VZ Well done, visually if not creatively. And anyone who doesn't want a ride in the plush-laden cab with a Cruel Intentions (**) disco ball dangling from the rear view mirror needs A millennial remake to have their head examined. - Francisco Delatorre of Dangerous Liaisons. Ryan Phillippe and 8MM (*Vl) Sarah Michelle Gellar Not even the writing of the gifted Andrew play rich young Kevin Walker can save this flop directed by Joel socialites moving from Schumacher. It is the story of a private detective conquest to conquest. whose inquiries into the authenticity of a snuff film Selma Blair and Reese reveal a grossly disturbing culture of pornography Witherspoon play their and violence. What he finds is not only that this cul- naive targets. Twisted ture provides a thriving environment for the morally happenings, sex, innu- vacuous, but that its implications and effects take a endo and humor pepper Kathryn (Sarah Michelle Gellar) and Sebastian (Ryan Phlilipe) are conniving stepslbllngs~ frightening toll on even the most virtuous of us. the sadists' futile attempts at happiness. Frightening, in its own regard, but the emotional While all the actors are decent in their roles, the and, at some high points, it's both. The connection witty, unapologetic in its gags, and completely impact is lost in the direction. Don't bother. - FD roles are almost completely one-dimensional. The between the audience and the narrator feels intimate earnest in dramatic romanticism. The resulting film' ., plot occasionally reaches cruel and comedic and immediate, and the hour .and a half passes in . displays uncanny verisimilitude in recreating Affliction (***IJz) heights, but regu!arly stumbles and becomes what feels like ten minutes. As always, it's life that Elizabethan England in all of its ungainly squalor and Nick Nolte plays a grown man still grappling exploitative. The rapport between Gellar and tells all the' best stories. -VZ .demonstrates nothing else than the genesis of true art with the ghost of his father's abusiven'ess. A sheriff Phillippe, and Witherspoon's acting talent, are the - from such humble beginnings as want, dirt, hate, in a small snowy town, he riles against the rich, most rewarding aspects. - RR Life is Beautiful (***) envy, and lust, as well as love and hope. - VZ against authority and against those who try to help Most reviewers praise the second half of this him. For a long time the rage has been kept in The Deep End ofthe Ocean (**V2) Italian tragicomedy - the,serious half. While it cer- She's All That (*V2) check, but it won't hold forever. When their middle child is lost, Beth and Pat tainly has its merits, it's the first hour which really A sickeningly offensive and sexist retelling of Although some characters in the movie are one- Cappadora (Pfeiffer and Williams) go the distance makes this film so remarkable. With its gentle the Pygmalion myth, placing it in the milieu of high dimensional, director Paul Schrader, working from searching for him, and fail. The tough choices only whimsy, subtle satire, and unabashed romanticism, school, where one local stud bets another one that a script by Russell Banks, puts together a very solid begin, however, when young Ben turns up nine this is the stuff of which the best romances are they can turn a local nerd into a prom queen. The film. Nolte and Coburn, as his father, ar~ astounding years later as another man's adopted son.' Though made. There are also classically gorgeous visuals, really sad thing is that there are flashes of creativity, and harrowing, and keep the movie's loose ends the plot tends toward melodrama or mere simple- memorable score, and elaborate visual and verbal originality, and'true human emotions sprinkled together to make for a powerful experience. - Roy mindedness, it reaches occasional insights. Buoyed gags aplenty. -VZ around this whole mess; just enough to make the Rodenstein by a game cast steered by firecracker Whoopi surrounding inanity e.ven more depressing. ~ VZ Goldberg, it wisely relies on the children to create Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels (***V2) Alaska (***V2) the most affecting scenes. - RR If you're looking for depth and emotional inten- Tango (***V2) On the surface, a classic OmniMax nature- sity, look further. If you want to watch a downright The story of Mario, the director of a tarigo dance themed documentary, replete with grandiose nature EDtv (:**1/2) enjoyable movie, this is it. The story of a group of performance, Tango has plenty of screen time for shots and panoramic views of mountain ranges from Highly agreeable and totally inoffensive story "honest criminals" and how they get mixed up in the dancers, but also makes room for musiCians and the helicopter. Underneath - an involving story, about a man who agrees to be a subject of an around London crime, drug, arid gambling underground is a actors. Mario falls in love with the troupe's spon- complicated one at best, but its sor's girlfriend, and the sponsor is not the kind to be fantastic use of music, dialogue, messed with. Less concerned with a traditional love and cinematography makes this story, the film instead concentrates on the tango, comedy a must-see. - FD danced in a dozen different settings and used to depict key periods in the history of Argentina. The Mod Squad (**) Dealing with people of all ages, Tango is also about With a game cast and plenty of memories. and desires. Along with a solid plot, the that 70's sensibility, down to the masterfi.d musicians and vibrant dancing make this camera bouncing in synch with movie a thorough delight. - RR the cheesy sound effects, The Mod Squad achieves its objec- Thrill Ride (**V2) tive quite well. The only prob- One third exhilarating, taking the audience on lem is that plot and characters the wild rides through the worlds created solely by lifted straight from the small the artists' imagination and state-of- the-art technol- screen donft fill the big screen. ogy. One third innocuous, with rather bland "educa- Explosions and abandoned tional" footage of rollercoasters and motion simula- warehQuses are the name of the tors. One third nauseating, with the impressive game, with maybe a crooked computer-generating effects being artless and trying cop thrown in for good measure. to conceal the fact that there's precious little sub- With Giovanni Ribisi stealing stance beneath the flashy surface. - VZ every scene he's in, which is for- tunately practically the whole Waking Ned Devine (***Y2) movie, The Mod Squad may be Charming comedy about a small town's quest for right up your.alley. Just don't go wealth. Nearly 7 million pounds is at stake in the Irish in expecting any kind of plot or national lottery, and the sleepy village of Tully More character development that you pulls together to outwit the officials after the winner, wouldn't see in an episode of a one of the town's inhabitants, dies at the shock of 70's TV show. - RR being rich. Standing in their way are individual greed and fear oflegal retribution, among others . . ' :.J ? UURIESPARIIAM Rushmore (***V2) Overall, it is a wholly enjoyable, hilarious, and Best Actress Gwyneth Paltrow with Joseph Rennes In John Madden's Shakespeare In Love, the Best A breath - or, rather, wonderfully written film. One of the best of 1998. Picture of the Year. make it blast - of fresh air. -FD • April 2, 1999 THE TECH Page 11 .,j\Iidersons To Become First Tang Hall. Housemasters By Krista L Niece LarrY Anderson has worked at dent," Orme-Johnson said. "We've Students help choose housemaster three graduate resident tutors on NEWS EDITOR MIT for four years. He worked at been wanting to have housemaster Deans for Student Life Margaret undergraduate Tang floors. For the first time in its history, his alma mater Rust College in coverage for grad students increase R. Bates and Associate Dean Tang students identified the two 'Tang Hall will soon have a house- Holly Springs, Mississippi, for eight anyway ... no one can quite explain Andrew M. Eisenmann '70 made finalists and made a final recommen- master. years previously. He completed his why" there has not been a house- the decision to place a housemaster dation to Dean Rosalind H. Williams, The role of housemaster at Tang graduate work at the University of master at Tang before, she .added. at Tang. The search committee who made the final decision. '.will be "very similar" to that of Mississippi. Several of the graduate dorms, included Orme-Johnson, two current Orme-Johnson cited a "need undergraduate housemasters, accord- . Dawn Anderson, who also grad- including Green and Westgate, housemasters, Tang House Manager unique to Tang," where students ing to Assistant Dean Carol Orme- uated from Rust, is a marketing rep- already have housemasters, but Dennis Collins, Graduate live only for one year, to build a

I. Johnson, who was on the search resentative for Harvard Community some, like Edgerton Hall, do not. Coordinator Sunil Sonath, and the strong community. l'committee. "Building community, Health. helping students to get to know each Larry Anderson served a "simi- other" and helping residents to feel at lar role" at Rust, as dorm councilor "What do you think of the music the third shift's been playing lately?" ~)tome are the major responsibilities. in an undergraduate dormitory. He The Graduate Student Council sees his upcoming role as very simi- "It's very fresh. If I could move, I'd be shaking my groove thing:' supported the addition. "It's great lar. "I want to help build communi~ that this opportunity exists that ty, be a resource person," he said .. ~wasn' t there before," Brian J. "We want to help make it the best Sc~eider G, president of the GSC. place [to live] that the dorm can be." Tang Hall is a graduate dormito- Tang is set up in individual 'rry for first year students. Currently, apartments, making community 10wever, three floors are occupied' building somewhat more difficult. with undergraduates to reduce "Having a faculty [member] there ... ,crowding in other dormitories. might overcome the barriers of the building" itself, Schneider said. Andersons to build community Associate Professor of Athletics Dean on call leaves Tang Hall .and men's basketball coach Larry . The decision to install a house-

l Anderson, his wife Dawn, and their master was made last summer, after two children, Paul and Skyy, will the top floor apartment was left take up residence at Tang sometime vacant when then-Dean on Call Leo 1his spring. Renovations are current- Osgood took a position in the office ly underway on the top floor apart- of minority education and moved ment, where they will live. out. The apartment had traditionally "The students are the reason I been the location of the Dean on ~~eally want to work there," Call, but after Osgood moved this Anderson said. "The students at' was changed. MIT have just been great." The timing was "partly an acci-

Explore Europe r .with people your own age r and have time tojouneyon your own.

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~~ MIT Student Center W20-o24 84 Massachusetts Ave. Cambridge, MA 02139 Phone: (617) 225-2555 .

The D~'partment of Architecture Freshman Open House

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Page 14 The Tech April 2, 1999 •• Crossword Puzzle 60 Summertime 46 Bearfike . 4 Woods' first 45 Interminably long ACROSS 47 Somewhat tangy drinks 1 Main artery 48 Cowardly dogs stroke 49 Adheres 61 Desperate 6 Beaver project 50 Explosive letters 5 Sound recording 6 Widow of a 56 Example 62 Concluding 9 Take up 51 Rampaged 52 ERA RBI knight 58 Sorry 'bout that episode 14 Nice good-bye? or 53 Get the point 7 Meetings' plans 63 Caviar base 15 In the past 59 Not fOoled by 54 Grounded bird 8 Romeo's last ." 16 Actress Taylor 55 Muscle spasm name 17 Lassoed 57 Intersecting 9 Circle segments 18 Guys thoroughfare 10 Overwhelming 19 Tidy up ,'" 62 Susan on flood Today's Solution 20 O1ief executive Lucci "All My Children" 11 Single 22 Hoagie 64 John's Yd

TechCalendar appears in each issue of The Tech and features events for members of the MIT community. The Tech makes no guarantees as to the accuracy of this information, and The Tech shall not be held liable for any loss- es, including, but not limited to, damages resulting from attendance of an event .. \ TechCalendar Contact information for all events is available from the TechCalendar web page. ' Visit and add events to TechCalendar online at http://fech-calendar.mlt.edu Friday's Events 26-100. Sponsor: LSC. 12:00 p.m. - Emerson Scholarship Student Recitals. Youssef Marzouk G, piano, per- Sunday's Events forms Schubert's Piano Sonata in Bb; Jaemin Rhee G, piano, performs Mussorgsky's 9:30 a.m.'- Sailing Regattas. Sailing Team regattas held at local venues. MIT, BU, Pictures at an Exhibition. Killian Hall. Harvard. Cheer on the Sailing Team or just enjoy a spring day by the riyer. BU. 4:00 p.m. - Climate Changes and the Vigour of the Deep-Sea Circulation on Sponsor: MIT Nautical Association .. Mlllennial to Milankovitch Time Scales. Professor I. Nicholas McCave, UniverSity of 12:00 p.m. - Service at common cathedral. Worship on Boston Common with, people Cambridge. Refreshments, 3:30 pm, Ida Green Lounge. Room 54-915. Sponsor: EAPS. who live outdoors and people who live indoors. Make and share peanut butter and jelly 4:00 p.m. - Air Sparging Panacea to Panic - Contaminated Site Remediation: Real sandwiches afterwards. Meet at Wll. Sponsor: Lutheran-Episcopal Ministry. World Examples. Matthew J. Barvenik, Senior Principal, GZA GeoEnvironmental, Inc. 6:00 p.m. -'Grains of Rice: A Celebration of_Asian Cultures. 11 Asian/Asian-American Room 1-350. Refreshments. Sponsor: Engineering & Environmental Mechanics Group. groups collaborate to produce a multicultural ethnic banquet followed by diverse cultur- 4:15 p.m. -, Recursive Statistics on Words. Dr. Jennifer Galovich, St. John's al performances, featuring the professional performance group HereandNow.' University. Refreshments will be served at 3:30 p.m. in Room 2-349. Room 2-338. Admis~ion $8.00. Walker Memorial. Sponsor: Asian ~acific. American Caucus. Sponsor: Combinatorics Seminar with MIT-Departme'nt of Mathematics. 7:00 p.m. - Orgazmo. Starring Trey Parker, creator of South Park, Michael D~an :lac'obs',- 7:00 p.m. - orgazmo. Starring Trey Parker, creator of South Park, Michael Dean Jacobs, and Robyn Lynne Raab. 94 minutes, rated NC-17. Admission 2.50. 26-100. Sponsor: LSC.. ~ and Robyn Lynne Raab. 94 minutes, rated NC-17. Admission 2.50.26-100. Sponsor: LSC. 10:00 p.m. - Blade. Starring Wesley Snipes. 120 minutes, rated R. Admission 2.50. '~-l 7:30 p.m. - A Night at the Opera. Starring the Marx Brothers. Cosponsored by the 26-100. Sponsor: LSC. DeFlorez Funds. 90 minutes, no MPM rating. Admission 2.50. 10-250. Sponsor: LSC. 8:00 p.m. - Spring Workshop Performance based upon The Tlreslas Legend. Monday's Events , ~ Dramashop's collective exploration of the Greek mythological prophet Tiresias, a blind 3:~0 p.m. - Health Risk of Low Doses of Ionizing Radiation: Damage Versus man with the ability to see the future & decipher the past. Directed by Brenda Cotto- Adaptation in Complex Biological Systems. Dr. Ludwig Feinendegen, National Escalera. Kresge Little Theater. 10:00 p.m. - Orgazmo. Starring Trey Parker, creator of Institutes of Health. Dept. of Nuclear Engineering/American Nuclear Society Seminars. South Park, Michael Dean Jacobs, and Robyn Lynne Raab. 94 minutes, rated NC-17. 1 hour 30 minutes. Refreshments in Room NW12-222 at 3:00 p.m. Admission 2.50. 26-100. Sponsor: LSC. 5:00 p.m. - Advanced Music Performance Recital: Ole Mattis Nielsen '00, flute. Advanced Music Performance Recital. Ole Mattis Nielsen '00, flute. Killian Hall. Saturday's Events 11:00 a.m. - Sailing Regattas. Sailing Team regattas held at local venues. MIT, BU, Tuesday's Events Harvard. Cheer on the Sailing Team or just enjoy a spring day by the river. BU. 2:00 p.m. - The Power of Vertical Integration. Michael Dell, CEO, Dell Corporation. Sponsor: MIT Nautical Association. Sponsored by authors@mit. Refreshments at 1:45 p.m. Dell appears in the Laboratory 11:30 a.m. - Sailing Regattas. Sailing Team regattas held at local venues. MIT, BU, for Computer Science's Distinguished Lecture Series. Room 26-100. Harvard. Cheer on the Sailing Team or just enjoy a spring day by the river. MIT-51, 3:00 p.m. - Hybrid Atomlstlc-continuum Simulations of Fluid Flow. Professor Sidney Sailing Pavilion. Sponsor: MIT Nautical Association. Yip, Massachusetts Institute of Technology. Sponsor: Physical Mathematics Seminar 2:00 p.m. - You Oughta Be In Pictures. Join MIT's Student Cable Group for the next with MIT-Department of Mathematics. Refreshments will be served following the semi- general meeting. Learn how you can get involved in television production. 9-026. nar in Room 2-349. 1 hour. Room 2-338. Sponsor: Student Cable Group / MITV, MIT. 4:00 p.m. - Rlsk-5ensltlve Stochastic Designs and Relationship with Nonlinear H- 7:00 p.m. - Blade. Starring Wesley Snipes. 120 minutes, rated R. Admission 2.50.26- . Infinity Control. Prof. Tamer Basar, University of Illinois. LIDS Colloquia. 1 hour. 100. Sponsor: LSC. Reception will follow in 35-338. Room 35-225. 7:00 - 8:30 p.m. - Movements In Time Dance. Preview of annual performance to be 4:00 p.m. - "High Crimes and Misdemeanors": Reflections on the Bonds between held May 1. $4 general admission, $3 students. Tickets available in advance, April 1-2 Past and Present. Pauline Maier, 1998-1999 Killian Faculty Achievement Award Lecturer. at The Source. Sala de Puerto Rico. 8:00 p.m. - Spring Workshop Performance based 27th Annual Killian Faculty Achievement Award Lecture. Wong Auditorium - Building E51. upon The Tlresias Legend. Dramashop's collective exploration of the Greek mythologi- 4:00 p.m. - The Design of Low Phase Noise Oscillators. Tom Lee, Stanford cal prophet Tiresias, a blind man with the ability to see the future & decipher the past. University. MTL VLSI Seminar Series. Refreshments in lobby of room 34-101 at 3:30 Directed by Brenda Cotto-Escalera. Kresge Little Theater. 9:00 - 10:00 p.m. - MITSSS p.m. 1 hour. Room 34-101. Easter Day Study Break. Singaporean Students' Society study break. Snacks and 4:30 p.m. - Control of Flutter In Turbomachlnery. Ms. Jin Young Hong, MIT/GTL. Gas refreshments will be provided. Free for all members and graduate students. Funded by Turbine Seminar Series. Refreshments 4:15. Room 31-161. GSC. Burton Conner Dining Hall. Sponsor: Singapore Students Society. 6:30 p.m. - Redevelopment of a European City. Hilmar von Lojewski, city planner, 10:00 p.m. - Blade. Starring Wesley Snipes. 120 minutes, rated R. Admission 2.50. Dresden. Architecture Lecture Series. Room 10-250.

Orthodox Christians Next week is Holy Week--join your fellow MIT students in attending church services. Visit the Orthodox Christian Fellowship homepage (at web.mit.eduJocf/www) to see service times at local churches and when we're walking over from MIT together. Everyone is welcome to join us in worship!

Also, mark your calendar for our Bright Wednesday vesper service (with the Boston Byzantine Choir) and lecture, at 6:30 on April 14 in the chapel. Father Peter Smith will give a lecture on Meeting the Challenge: The Orthodox Church in the 21s1 Century. Refreshments will be served, and everyone is welcome.

Questions? Call John at 225-9818 or ~mail [email protected] April 2, 1999 THE TECH Page 15

Tell us about the quality of your life: your academic and residential experience, social opportunities, access to services .. ·

r1••• ' Disagree - THIS YEAR, how sati$fi~d have you been with: .~ Very Very No Basis for \f-ed? e" D[ssatlstled Dissatisfied Satisfied Satis/led .Judgment 9!ur ov.e~;11~XP~C~ at your c~ge/university? C) () () () :~-j • your academic experi&r~? $~ o o o o Cj .. the accessibility of faculty ~mbers? • () () (~) () () Y\110U:c9ajfJ~vising? '" • o o o o • yl'lur residentlalli4erience? "0 .• 'V () C) ~ the residential life 04? ~ 0 . o o (-, ... '""- the oPE.~rtunity to meet ~Jdents f~ other~sidences? C) ' ..../ . ~~ttft"aqrernance s~tem? 0- (9 o-' o () () "'...... ( ..-.. '. • s~curity on c~~s? 0.. 0 (9 _ ...._) your social Ufe? (9 .. (9 • + o o " , . cultural activities (~ .. lectur-o. conc1s)? • () "j (. ) ("'- " your on-campus jot)? IIIl CD • o () _J o the career develop ~t office t) :s. en ~ sense of community on CamP'? '.. ::: o : the administration in ~neral? fD • 0 counseling servicesiJ - tIJ •' :J o dining services? ~ " • CO o ~! the financial aid c8ice? " ~ ~ () ,o'Jr, finan~rl.'w.a~ packag~1 " ... (~~:) stU aliUJlm .services? ~ 118 o resources (e.g .. book~ournals) ~'he Iibr~eS? C") ~erv~ces providecl ~~e Iibrari~' . " o ~ th~ rie~!i

PR.IZES $1000 $600 $4-C>C> Deadline The completed application form, written statement and supporting works should be submitted on: April 5, 1999

NOTE: Applications should be picked up in advance.

A show featuring the winning artists will open in the Wiesner Art Gallery on May 11, 1999 Applications Student Art Association Stratton Student Center-Room 429

..' Campus Activities Complex Stratton Student Center-Room 500

Office of the Arts Wiesner Building-E 15-205 More Information The Student Art Association / W20-429 /253-7019 Page 16 THE TECH . April 2, 1999 ..

IAIEIHEIEY. tAll A ;r. IAIEA tAB. STAID.

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The Council for the Arts at &fIT

offers A FREE TICKETS for MIT students f)I)I~~IIf)IJ~I~ to World Music's presentation of ~~ Gypsy Department of Caravan Aeronautics and Astronautics 'A.Celebration of Roma Music & Dance

Featuring more than 30 musicians and dancelS, Gypsy Caravan traces the Roma migration from its origins in India through Westem Europe and celebrates the amazing resilience of Gypsy culture despite persecution and even genocide. The . festival offers a magnificent range of artists with Monday, April 5 the deepest roots in Roma traditions. Highlights include Rajasthani dancers and musicians from India, the spirited 8-piece band Taraf de Haiouks from Romania, fiery flamenco 3:00 - 5:00 artists from Spain. emotive music and dance from Bush Room: 10-105 " Russia, exceptional traditions from Hungary, " .. Turkish-influenced music and dance from Bulgaria and Macedonia, and more!

Lab Tours Leave Rm. 10-105 "Monday AprilS, 1999 at 3: 15, 3:45, 4:15 7:30pm Find out what Unified Engineering is like Sanders Theater Harvard Square, Cambridge ". See the exciting opportunities in Aero/Astro Sign up IN PERSON ONLY at the MIT You too can be a rocket scientist! Office of the Arts (E15-205) with your valid MIT student 10 and a $5.00 deposit that will be returned to you.

(Signing up and not showing up ~, will result in the loss of your deposit) .'April 2, 1999 THE TECH Page 17 ..VestTo Announce $-1Billion Campaign in November \ . By Rima Amaout an increase in endowment spend- more actively. The endowment ASSOCIATE NEWS EDITOR ing. currently totals approximately $4 In an effort to boost the pro- "The campaign is an element of billion. ...gramming and improve facilities a broader financial plan for the insti- "When we raise [capital cam- across campus, the MIT administra- tution. The financial plan is some- paign] money for professorships, tion is planning a capital campaign thing that I ultimately have to pre- graduate fellowships, and under- , to raise one billion dollars over the sent to the trustees and get graduate scholarships, those are 'next seven years. adopted," Vest said; things that build endowment," Vest "As far as I'm concerned, [the Vest, Curry, Brown and Bacow said. They don't provide a huge campaign] has already begun," will work closely with the amount of new income in a given \ said President Charles M. Vest. Academic Council to design the year, but they really build the stabil- "When you mount a capital cam- capital campaign. While "we are ity of the institution for the long run. paign, you really try to raise still in the process of designing the I cannot tell right now what the bal- , around a third of the money before campaign, with a goal of announc- ance between gifts to be expended lit's publicly annQunced so you ing it and,Y of our campus are under considera- existing facilities such as class-

Raymond S. Stata '57, Chairrilan of . _tion." <, rooms and access to information Raymond S. Stata '57 Analog Devices', and Alexander V. The financial plan includes rais- technology. D' Arbeloff, to' help the campaign ing the funds for many projects ~ , . ~geton'its way. throughout MIT. As far as phYSIcal , Vest is "in the process right now improvements to the campus go, of holding about a dozen consulta- "there are several projects which are ~,~iondinners around the country" to underway or are moving into the I.talk to "people who are potential, queue," Vest said. donors." "Things are moving ahead very rapidly with the new undergraduate Wrivate funds grow in importance residence hall, the Stata Center," Vest hopes that the campaign_ the second phase of the Baker will "raise the level of giving to the - House restoration, Vest said. "In ~institution... what normally happens addition, there will'be a major

I is tl:1at[giving] grows rather steeply expansion of the Media Lab... most during the duration of the campaign of the funding for tha~ has in fact and then hopefully remains at that been raised." -'level." Within the next ten years, Vest The campaign is also a "mecha- also hopes to see the new central . ) nism for focusing the institution ... athletics facility and a graduate resi- ~.( ~ on what priorities are and how to go dence become reality. Furthermore, '~about accomplishing them,", Vest "we are looking at a series of issues said. around the facilities of the Sloan The timing for the capital cam- School and the School of :~aign is also significant",;'.MIT.~is,. Humanities and Social Sciences,"

I going to be increasingly dependent Vest said. on private support. That's because Money raised.from the capital the other two sources of revenue - campaign will also be used to fund ~tuition and federally sponsored programmatic improvements to research - are either not going to MIT. In terms of academic pro- grow very fast or possibly even be grams, "we continue to grow the leduced," V,estsaid. life sciences," Vest said. "We hope to move very aggressive.1yin Steering committee to be named the area ,of neuroscience" w4ich To direct the progress ofthe cap- Vest foresees will have "a very ,,.tal campaign the administration is exciting future on the campus." currently naming about a dozen Energy will also focus on develop- people affiliated with MIT but from ing environmental and cancer outside the Institute to head up a research. -I capital campaign steering commit- Other improvements will be tee. - made possible as the capital cam- The steering committee will be paign increases MIT's ability to ,~'working with a number of possible spend from its endowment. The .donors and being available to capital campaign will, add to the address groups and explain the endowment, which will be used importance of the campaign," Stata : said, chair of ~he steering commit- tee. Steering committee members ....are being chosen because their .own financial commitments to MIT gives them a good back- ground from which to solicit gifts .:from others. "Ray [Stata] is a won- Jesus Week derful person," Vest said, "and of course now he has the opportunity ,to stand ,up and say, 'I did some- tthing spectacular and y~u should too.", ~other member onhe commit- htee so far includes Chairman of the The Christians on the MIT • MIT Corporation and Teradyne cofounder Alexander V. D' Arbeloff campus want you to know '49. According to the Office of i'Resource Development, all the steering committee members should more about Jes,us, because be announced by the end of April. He has greatly impacted ~'Campaign fits into larger plan Another major responsibility of our lives. the steering committee will be to .;.'integrate the fundraising efforts of April 4th to April 10th' the capital campaign into the admin- istration's broader financial plan for MIT. The week begins with an invitation to church on Easter Sunday. It ~ontinues with a study t" This plan is being designed by Vest, Executive Vice-President break featuring the MIT CrossProducts, on Mond~y April 5th in W20 at 10P~. John R. Curry, Provost Robert A. i,Brown, and Chancellor Lawrence 'S. Bacow '72, includes not only F~r more info: http://web~mit.edu/christro/www/jesusweekl, look for posters, or contact [email protected] building projects but programmatic changes to the campus as well as Page 18 THE TECH Aprii 2, 199~.~ Sigma Nu's Alcohol-Free Policy Impresses Board Sigma Nu, from Page I mature decision," said License Civic Association, nervous about hearing] in order to get to know was formed four years ago, with it~ Board Member Richard Mulligan. welcoming a fraternity into the them, and let them have the chance membership growing steadily ove] Dorow also mentioned that "in "I only wish the rest of the fraterni- neighborhood after Fiji's track to meet us" in an effort to be good the years. The MIT chapter 01' addition to the initiatives of Sigma ties are as mature as Sigma Nu." record. The Civic Association also neighbors, Schmidt said. The Sigma Nu has been officially alco- Nu itself, the Institute has redoubled Pokaski made clear during the complained that Sigma Nu's mov- Fenway CDC ended up submitting a hol free since February 1999, and its efforts to encourage all MIT fra- hearing that "if the license is grant- ing to the Fenway would take apart- letter of support for Sigma Nu to the the national Sigma Nu fraternity has. ternities to behave responsibly." ed, it would be strictly contingent ments off the market, although 28 Licensing Board. pledged to be alcohol free by the) Dorow cited as a few of MIT's on the maintenance of the no-alco- The Fenway was never designated year 2000. efforts the new resident advising hol policy." Pokaski also suggested as apartment housing. Sigma Nu to move to the Fenway Sigma Nu's current building on system and expanded Campus that Sigma Nu should make publica The licensing hearing was origi- Now that Sigma Nu has been 523 Newbury Street houses only 15,' Police patrols in Boston. contact person to uphold dialogue nally scheduled for Mar. 10 but was granted the new dorm license, plans of its 27 members. In February The Licensing Board seemed between the fraternity and the delayed until Mar. 31 so that Sigma will be underway to move to the 1999, Sigma Nu applied to the more impressed with the individual Fenway community. Nu could meet with the Fenway new location. "The current plan is Licensing Board for a license to . efforts of Sigma Nu - and its no- Community Development . we're going to talk toJhe Malcolm live at Fiji. "The property at 28 The) alcohol policy in particular - than Civic group initially opposes move Corporation to discuss the move's Cotton Brown Corporation and Fenway is the"right size, arrange- with improved MIT policy. "[Sigma The one voice of opposition at implications. arrange a plan with them" for mov- ment, and location. Its financial Nu's no-alcohol policy] is a very the hearing came from the Fenway - "We voluntarily postponed [the ing in, Schmidt said. and physical demands are withiIl.l. According to Schmidt at the our means," said Schmidt at the hearing, when Sigma Nu moves to hearing. its new location, 523 Newbury Fiji's license was revoked in Street may be transformed into 1997 after the Krueger tragedy t"~ apartments, or it may ~ annexed by Since then, only a handful of former an MIT sorority. Fiji members have been living at 28 The MIT chapter of Sigma Nu the Fenway as caretakers.

GABOR CSANYI-THE TECH Tlresias (Andrea H. Zengion '99) is rejected even by his daughters Historls (Plnar Kip '02, left) and Manto (Deborah A. "They make Lul '02) when he returns after having to abandon them in Dramashop's production of Tlreslas. it easier - to leave office." CLASSIFIED ADVERTISING .Help Wanted EGG DONORS NEEDEDI Desperately wanted by infertile, hopeful parents~' -President George Bush THE PRINCETON REVIEW wants All races needed. Ages 21-30. bright, enthusiastic people to reach Compensation $3,500. Please Call SAT, LSAT, and MCAT courses OPTIONS National Fertility Registry throughout Massachusetts. No (800) 886-9373 "~ experience necessary-high scores a . must! $15 to $17 jhr. Call M-F 1-5 pm . • ServlceS Offered 1-800-2-REVIEW. Part-Time Jobs catering Waitstaft & GET PAID TO PARTYIIIFestive Events Bartenders. Work when you want~ Kresge Auditorium is looking for outgoing people to Transportation Provided! Bartending learn the fine art of DJ entertaining. Classes also available! Call New Great source of extra cash. Full Dimensions Services (617) 423-1999 training provided! Must have car and DrlnkMaster Bartending Schoo~ Wednesday, April 14, 8:00 pm must be available on weekends. Call Evening & Weekend Classes! Student (508) 881-1095. Discountsl Job Opportunities Available! "TIPS" Certificationl (617) 482-1999 $5 with MIT ID, $10 for other students, $20 for the general public. Wanted: Campus Reps!! The local Princeton Review office is looking • Travel Tickets are available atThe Source, or by credit card at 617.253".0465. for a self-motivated, enthusiastic undergrad to serve as an on GET THE HEU OUT OF HERE! Mexico, campus representative. Flexible the Caribbean or Central America hours, good starting wage. Bonuses $199 round trip. Europe $169 onEfJ http://lsc .mit.edu/~apsteps/ possible. Gain valuable marketing way. Other worldwide destinations experience. First and Second years cheap. Book Tickets on line Sponsored by LSC, with the gracious assistance of the Council for the Arts at MIT, the Peter DeFlorez Fund, the Filipino Students' Association, and ~ are encouraged to apply! www.airtech.com or (212) 219-7000 •. L. • Freshman Open House

'r Tuesday, April 6 3-5pm in Roqm 5-314

Find out about Careers in OE Meet faculty and students See displays of current projects Learn ah.out UROPS in OE

l,- ., ENGINEERING Be a part of the Wave of the" Future

;. April 2, 1999 THE TECH Page 19 ~ .,Audience Jleceptive ,To Frank Frank, from Page I

\he American Association of Retired Persons ever hold a "die-in" pre- cisely because they did not need to. \ Frank ended his address by stat- ing that "care much more about GET THE SCOOP ON US what you think than you realize." Politicians "don't like to care," MEET OUR frank said but when voters are mobilized he went so far as to FACULTY & STUDENTS "guarantee that politicians will pay ~ttention to you." Gay rights, alcohol addressed TUESDAY, APRIL 6TH ,One of the evening's most inter- e.stingmoments carne in response to 3:00-5:00 PM a question about students and alco- hol. Frank interrupted the question- THE BUSH ROOM (10-105) er, Joel M. Rosenberg G, with the littort "if all you care about is your right to drink don't write me, I don't give a shit." Frank said that he fould try to 'motivate students to vote with issues of abortion rights and federal aid for education but ENJOY FREE FOOD & MAGIC SHOW dismissed th'e importance ,of stu- tlentS' right to drink in light of other issues such as racism, homophobia and poverty. Frank also addressed the issue of Jarnpaign finance reform. He ques- tioned statistics which claim that collecting more campaign funds ~ads to victory. Frank suggested, instead, that winning candidates 'attract funds: "there are a lot'of whores out there who want to give 'tb the winner." ' A question from the audience prompted Frank, who is openly gay, COURSE 3 tt> address the progress of gay rights legislation., Fr'ank compared President Clinton's commitment'to gay rights to John 1:. Kennedy's OPEN HOUSE qommitment' to endin'g'racism:' Frank predicted that legal recogni- tion of marriage is "ten years or Tuesdciy~-APrU 6~-'999 more away" but was more opti- &.istic about health and pension benefits for domestic partners in the short term. He said that those fight- ~g for gay and lesbian rights have 11:30 - 1:30 'won the cultural battle" and "homophobics feel really unhappy" , about the state of gay rights. ' ~.~Frank also spoke' about his efforts to liniit feder~l restrictions' Bush ROCIllit 10 -- 105 on marijuana in response to another 9uestion. He said that his bill to remove possession of marijuana from the list of crimes which dis- qualify students 'from federal aid MEET faculty and Studentsl {aced a "very uphill fight" mainly because congressmen fear being seen as soft on drugs.. EniOY some Pizza and ice aeaml Come Leam About .the Options of Seins, Course 3it 3Ait 3Bit or' Londoa•••••~•••••.$205 3C. , Frankfurt .....~..$286', How 3B, DMSE's INTERNSHIP PROGRAM

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5i./j • 2nd summer's work report can be used in lieu of Departmental S.B. thesis requirement. STA TRAVEL WE'VE1EEN1HEIE. www.statravel.com Page 20 THE TECH April 2, 1999 SPORTS. UPCOMING HOME EVENTS Friday, April 2 Baseb~ll vs. Brandeis University, 3:00 p.m. Pistol vs. Alumni

Saturday, April 3 Women's Lacrosse vs. Springfield College, I :00 p.m. " Men's Tennis vs. Clark University, 1:00 p.m.

Sunday, April 4 Softball vs. Mount Holyoke College, 12:00 p.m'.

Monday, April 5 Baseball vs. Wentworth Institute of Technology, 3:30 p.m. Women's Crew vs. Boston College and Boston University

Tuesday, April 6 Baseball vs. Babson College, 3:30 p.m. MING-TAI HUH-THE TECH Softball vs. Babson College, 3:30 p.m. Alvle Loreto '01 tips a pitch foul In a game against WPI Tuesday. MIT went on to win the game 5-1, Men's Tennis.vs. Tufts University, 3:30 p.m. bringing their season record to 4 wins and 4 losses • Women's Lacrosse vs. Colby-Sawyer College, 7:00 p.m.

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"TO BOLDLY GO" Practical Career Plann~ing for Scientists and Engineers

A two hour workshop for graduate students and post-docs in all fields of science

Presenter: Dr. Peter Fiske, author of "To Boldly Go: A Practical Career Guide for Scientists" and columnist for AAAS's career website, "Science's NextWave" HOLD THIS DATE: Friday, April 9th 2:00 P.M. Room 6..;120.

, PRE-REGISTRATION IS REQUIRED • You can sign up through April 6th at: web.mit.edulcareer/www

".. This event is cosponsoled by the Office of Career Services and Preprofesional Advising and the Graduate Education Office /..

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