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WolfpaCk sweeps national championship

gar figfimdnce Ignighen a Wm?“;a brou‘StrRaleigh. North Carolina into the Mtlio'bd gunfight by achieving the primary{position in both the AP and UPI Final Polls . . . or since Thompson. 7 owe omm Burieeon. known' Moa'to olfpackersacrosst ecount as“ umanS rin ." ht Mite.’and‘Gentl G“ t.’ through rank andflleofin basketballtotbeheraldednationalcrozrninGreensbeeoColiseum'.y..y , _ ry p gMigy em! swept the For the first time since Mo Rivers. Phfl Spence. and Tim S the besthfourth. fifth, and sixth players in‘NCAAroundball. dribbled. passed. assisted. stole. rebounded. jump-balled. laid-up, and hook shotpastMaryland.UCLAmdfinallytbesecondbestteaminthecountry.Marquette... , , ‘ £0; thbze flat time since the great State coach Norman Sloan brilliantly maneuvered his oncebeaten-in-53-games team to the only NCAA first place finish in its history . . . as n no Sunday afternoon in Billowsport. Montana. State pulled in a long sought after national trophy in the moderatelyrugged, but easily recovering (see“Partiesplanned”p.5)

ra.shmc1an

Serving Ourselves Since 1920 .AAAAAAAA‘AA. AAA90°”.AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA‘-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA“-AAAA“AA‘AAA‘AAAAAAAAAAAAA-AAAAAA‘AAAA‘A‘AA-AAAAAA“AA‘AA‘-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA‘AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA‘AAA., Monday, and; 2, 1979 vvvvvvvvvvvv'vvvvvvvvvvvv'vv-vvvvvvvvvvvvvv"vvVvv'vvvvvvv—vvV'V'vvvvvvVvvvvvv"Vvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvv‘. . vvvvaVvvV'vvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvVvvvVvvvvvvvvvvvvvavvvvv'vvvvavvvvv'v'v“-

to. my... rth denies

he’s athletic supporter

byPolyTesla- like? Dullsville. U.S.A.. I mean, think NewsCommentator about. it,jocksareacommodity that this campuscan't afford not to support—can Amidst a gala champagne and Gatorade inaugural celebration with And what else would we use Reynolds decorinearly beer at the palatial estate Coliseum and Carter Stadium for— of Athletics Director Willis Casey parking? Hell. those upper sections Sunday night. Student Body President— would be rough to get a station wagon electJ.D'. Hayworth denied thathe's an up. athleti supporter. Third. if those students want to use Ext acting; a cleat from his ear. the field. it seems quite simple to me Hayworth said, “Hay. babe, do I look that they oughta join the teams. So the like 'a jock? I mean, check out these fence actually promotes school spirit gams. I‘mfor real. The people's choice. I and a healthy interest in competition— got' the vote 'cause I'm the man for the which I think you'll agree is the position. And if you think different. I'll American way. have Bo Rein thrash you with a ragged “Fourth. I'm the head cheese around chin strap.” here and I like the fence—so bug off. Flexing his nostrils. Hayworth wimp.“ continued: “I don't know what you folks Afler aseriesofpush-ups. knee bends are raisin' such a stink about that fence and arm-wrestling a lampshade. for. Willis bought Student Affairs fair Hayworlh autographed an Ace band- and square. cash on the barrelhead. age. removed his football helmet and ‘resumed entertaining guests. PinonA.Fens "You got the word from the man. no go and tell the people where I'm coming “And what's ‘mo fundamental to this from. pardner." he said. biting a beer whole issue is the basic principle at mug. “And feel free to drop by Student hand. As I see it. there are four basic Government sometime and we'll shoot a principles:first of all. that fence few hoops or drop-kick an issue or two. pl‘figflcutbc students.fromoverualous Twenty—two. thirteen. forty-nine. hul- . *’ compet . whu‘ have ‘3‘ ‘mr‘n‘n‘am a”... ~ «2 2‘ -.~.---. tendency to bash in the heads of people Athletics Director Willis Casey was who ask too many questions. You know» also in attendance Sunday but. delcined what I mean. baby? Io comment on reports that he planned Second. if it wasn’t for the athletes, to aslro—lurf Western Boulevard as a do you know what this place w0uld be driving range for State's golfing team. Staff poem by Larry knell Staffphoto”Owlswe mmwsmdembodypreeldempleaaestandup? ’i‘

Nuke plan fizzles Drive-in cafeteria

on back burner to serve students by RediKflowatt (Effigy. N:C.. pop. 143. is located two SpecialCorrespondent miles south of the Shearron Harris by Rick Erixon Possible adverse reaction by the Facility.) Stuff Writer students themselves was feared. “The HARRISBURG. PA.-—Tbe Nuclear Approximately 500 miles south of the little ones would have skipped Regulatory Commission stated today N-accident site in Pennsylvania. the “it's a miracle! They've really pulled breakfast all semester long and would that it was no longer considered editorial staff of North Carolina State my chestnuts out of the fire." have explained to mom and dad about necessary to evacuate residents from University's student newspaper. the Such was the elated within a ten-mile radius of the Technician. stated that it will not reaction of State all the money being wasted by buying 1" Three-Mile Island nuclear facility. satyrize the accident. John Flesher. Transportation Director Molly Pipe‘s the meal plan." said White. ! While at first this announcement editor-inlchief. reaction to the proposed multimillion "That's why I agree with Molly that said that this year. the . '__ ‘ dollar multiple-use structure that will A.H.'s idea is tremendous." White inspired hope that the radiation leak Technician will make fun of campus Slall photo by Larry Merren be built in the large unused area concluded. had subsided. it was later learned that issues only. Athletics Director Willis Casey lpictured abovel refused to elaborate on Hayworth’s bet ween Owen and Tucker residence Administrators believe that Harris” the evacuation was called off because * (Ifcurrent weatherpatterns hold. the sloped ties with the Athletics Department. saving. "can’t halls. “This solution to two of our coordination of the two needs will save ". . . not one damn thing was found alive NCSU campus can expect another you see I'm busy?" biggest campus problems to evacuate!" “problem" about 8:00 am. Tuesday.)' was a pure the day. In light of this new inconvenience. a slrokc of genius." veteran corpseremoval squad from “Hang that sucker up' No need for it Fort Bragg's elite 82nd Airborne The solution is a 15»story combination Division was put on alert for At N.C. State's Burlington Labs. the parking deck and cafeteria that is “In my days at State I have noticed deployment to Pennsylvania. It is personnel in charge of running the expected to be in use by 1983. that there has been an increasing need thought that the radiation would cause PULSTAR reactorwere unavailablefor The idea came out of the office of for parking spaces while students problems for the Jonestown veterans comment but the Athletics Department facility planner AB. Harris. long an avoided first Leazar and then Harris but General Wadsworth Piffleton. offered to pul a “protective enclosure" advocate of cooperative use of the ((Tafeterias) like the plague." Harris XVIII Airborne Corps Commander. around the building. Boss Casey said precious little land that exists free of observed. “So I thought. ‘What if we state that his team will just wair for "We could have that sucker up before buildings on the State campus. required students to buy a meal plan thesun to set. “All those bodies glowing you knew it! Fences is great for before becoming eligible for a parking in the dark will make it damned easy to protection from and against minor. V'room-vroom lottery‘." That way a spoonful of sugar see!" Sort of an ironic twist to the pelly irritants." Stale administrators Hhe parking space) would help the current energy crisis. did nol comment immediately concern- "ln Ibis age of the omnipresent medicine (required meal plan) go Volunteers were called for at Fort ing Boss Casey’s offer but trucks internal combustion clunkers. we must down. Bragg yesterday to man the team. carrying rolls of chain-ling have been find a place forour modern gladiators to “I had originally hoped for a hat trick "Only those who don't mind having rolling inlo Riddick Stadium lot for the park their chariots." said Harris. "At solving State's three major problems— weird-looking kids and don't mind being past 24 hours. least We were able to salvage some l'ood. parking. and housing. But the le- able to roast wiennies without a uscfulncss out of the area by requirements for self-supporting status A campfire should volunteer." Stated When asked about the possibility of incorimruling a cafeteria. There is also for dorms messed us up. Funding just General Mills. commander of the 82nd pulling a 'fence around the N

EXplosion wipes out Duke baske- all team 'I'hetape gotsqnelderably “This daggone city. you to throw whiskey bottles in “has were playing against just inaudible aflor that point. can't find nothing." said the middle of the playing . l!!!" Wriiar robot-like things.” but then a large dry can be Herschel Andropizxinl. di- area during the sports‘ The student went on to _heard.. saster specialist from Duke respective ACf‘. . explain that Foster had been “We are great. we are Medical Center. “I’ve lived Tournament. DURHAM—In an incred-. right in his guess and the great. We are the best. we herethreefriggin'yel-snow ACC Comissioner Bob ible tragedy yesterday. Blue Devils did indeed lose are the best." chanted the and I still can't drive in this James was unavailable for Duke the national championship to recording at that point. place. It‘s like circles.man. comment;but an ACC office Michigan State at Cameron After a multitude .of just friggin' circles." spokesman made the follow- was destroyed in an explo- Indoor Stadium. rumblings. a voice deeper Andropissini refined to ing statement. slon Nonetheless.theexplosion than anyofthevoiceanalysts comment on the explosion. Police are still investigat- that wiped out the team had ever heard becomes saying only. “We were afraid some- ing the situation. but one remained a mystery to the clear. "this place sucks. You can't thing like this might hap- Duke student told the student. "Thou shalt not believe ' drive in it and I‘m tired of pen." said the spokesman. followingstory ‘i‘ The police did reVeal the thou art greater than every living in it. Let 'em all “Just when we get Georgia ‘ . “It seems coach (Bill) 8ct that a tape recorder had other."boomed the voice. explode.“ Tech'in the league to even it Foster got ahold of the game been found among the The only other sound on ‘ The Duke student govern- up so there are no byes. we films of the Other night's remnants left from the the tape is a short popping ment called an emergency have something like this NCAA championship game explosion. noise. much like the sound of session. not to dMusa the happening. Well. we're mad between Michigan State and “Eventhough welostI still ‘ P°P°°m POW"- mourning! of the basketball about,that's about all we can Indiana State. I heard he had am sure that we are the best Althatremeinedwesheeflessbevls.‘ “It seems to me.” said one team, but to discuss which say. the Indiana State players team in the nation." the oice analyst, “that the boys sport would replace basket- removed from the film and recording said. believed by player. Ask anybody else— great ball game. It's hard to that Huffman kid's echoes. ust got a little too big- ball as the social event in “They just screwed us up got some of our greatest voice experts to be the voice it's the intangibles that believe the scoreboard said No. no. I'm sure he didn't headed for theirown heads." which all students would bad. Now we’ve got to find professorstobuildamachine of Mike Gminski, the Duke count. we lost. We've got the mean anything when he Members of the Durham cuss. get drunk and proceed another team for the ACC." that would transform the center. ”And look down the greatest teamin the country. brokeJayVincent'sjaw with Ambulance Squad were also film into the life-flke figures “Magic Johnson is a fair road—Johnson is going to go there’s no doubt about that," that littletapwith the elbow. on hand,but they had no idea of the Michigan State ballplayer. but I'd still say to pro ball and probably the soft voice said. “Every- It's hard to believe a team of what to make of the ALL YOU CANEAT players. Kenny (Dennard) is better." make a few million just like body just played great. that actually beat us is so situation. "Well. our team began to the voice continued. “I don't me.But what does he have? “Mike. Gene (Banks). and fragile." “I've never seen anything PIZZA BUFFET ‘ play the exact same game as think the fact that Earvin He probably won'teven get a Kenny—whatcanIsay about An unrecognizablevoice in likeit."saidonerescuesquad the championship game only scored 46 points and Kenny collegedegree and I'll have a Kenny! He's just so great. the background appeared to member. “The bodies are , Soup&Salad_Bar we got to play instead of scoredfourmeansJohnson is degree from Duke. which No, no, I don't think he was ask Foster what he thought totally intact. but these guys Eva-yMy&'IhesdayNight Indiana State since we any better. means I can do anything I intentionally trying to hurt of the play of Jim Spanarkel. heads are nowhere to be messed up and didn't really “I mean look at the other want when I finish playing anybody when he punched. I “Jim. did he play?" replied found. If exploding heads 53pm get to go that far. Anyway. stats. Kenny got six re- ball." mean hit. I mean bumped the soft voice. “fans so busy caused all this damage. well . coach Fosteronldn’t let bounds and Johnson got 12 Also on the tape was a Greg Kelser in the face with watching Mike and Gene and students into the gym Kenny a had three assists voice thatMbelonged his fist. I mean hand. Kenny I didn’t even see Jim. An emergency specialist becausehe wasstillafraidwe and Johnson had 11. Obvi- to Foster. “No, I don't think he was Bytheway. will hebecoming was called in but he never 851-6994 might lose even though we ously, Kenny is the better "Gee. we just played a being cruel when he stole back next year " ' - arrived until it was too late. 3933va Aao-fmmlleatl’mdnets 5 Iclams Pant: Time Help TYPlNG FOR STUDENTS done 1 9 hours weekly in my home. is years experience. Reasonable rates. Call 834-370. Good Working Conditions SUMMER CAMP JOBS: Brother- Com-78%: Harold Johnson camps. Penna. Mts. June 2l-AugSlster it. Students a: faculty qualified to teach any of follow- Hyland Plasma Center ing: Swimming (WSI). water aide skiing, all sports. crafts. ritlery. 1 Maiden Lane, archery.evmnastlcs.nature. pho- tography. ham radio. rocketry. 828-1 590 tennis. science, pianist. dance. trlpmaster. unit leader, R.N.'s. Levy, Apr. 4, Holiday Cellinn North.Morgan872-7666. After Apr. 4 send resume to: RD. #5. Box 20. Waynesboro. Pa. 17268. HELP WANTED BECOME A schoolteacher and Flexible Hours make the little things count. Start now, SUMMER FULL TIME and Semester part'time work as a continue thru summer general office assistant, which Next time you get hungry for some- includes operating a small offset printing machine, and also yard contact' Craig Bullock thing. really good to eat, head for and light ianitoriai work. Call now .e .‘n ll4-1_-.. streamlines. ismWWWW of 1.7, "i i,"-.‘’ t'. ‘t‘lltt‘J‘jl lliw :3"-- Vow-alumywaanymfa'nfim 91 ‘ W.1: l-‘QN 1,” PHOIJR'Ilamimab CONDUCT ‘rouascts properly the best solid in town, up "n and you may lead a band. P—ri_ TECHNOLOGY, INSTITUTIONS down, all around.‘And'lois oI‘il. SUMMER SUBLEASE furnished. AND SOCIAL CHANGE , . Hordee's Best Eotin' Special. carpeted $145 a month. One bath. kitchen. large A multidisciplinary course taught by Two of the biggest, most livingbedroom.area. min. walk to central campus. Contact 210 Cox Ave. A. Coutu - economist special tostin' sandwiches you Apartment C. P. Pavlik political scientist have ever sunk your teeth R Buchdahl physicist WHAT YOUthinkcouldn’t happen info. And at a price that's wouldn't. real special, too. 50 special, UNI 495K 3 credit hrs. you're gonna think Hordee's Mon. Evening 7-10pm is downright crazy to charge The Trashnician is the first newspaper worth a damn to so little for so much fine eatin'. emerge from this miserable excuse of university since 1920. It SCHOOL or accurrrcrunr ANT: is published once a year on or around April i except when the DESIGN sruoeurs staffistoodrunkto put it together. Offices are located in the base- .Plasticsheets.rods.tubes.tllms0 Accessories ment floor of Dorothear Dix .Plexiglas-Wecuttosize.Bargainbarrel otcut-ofts Hospital. Raleigh, N.C. Mailing . address is determined by your carrier pigeon. Application for COMMERCIAL PLASTICS 8. second postage was made in the still waiting SUPPLY CORP. forstonetheagebureaucratsand we’retoget off their faces and give it to us. Printed by 73] W Horgett St. 828-4 1 Hinton Press. Mebane. N.C. 00 (wiien they can stomach us). lO% Discount With this

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llFE AFTEII fllflfi? You’re aiming for a college Get the facts on leader- degree. And with that in hand ship management training. you’ll be looking for‘a job Learn what increases your offer You may find it won't leadership potential in the be automatic. Forthat reason job market. Sophomore. you it's important for you. as a can do something about your sophomore. to make life after college. most of your last two years Stop by the Army ROTC - in college. Whatever your Department for this infpr- — - s . career choice. you'll want to motive packet. , . become competitive and Reynold. COIBW. Room 152 marketable. It won'tbeeasy Cam. nowIev maxim-2429 I but you’ll find yourself better Tl prepared if you look ahead. Now. WWW? ummmmmmhu outrun.“ Good at all participating Hordees. Please present this coupon before ordering. One coupon per customer, please. Customer must pay any sales tax due “R"NMMEWO THAT’S Yllflll ”WISH”. on the purchase price.This coupon not goodIn combination WIth any other offers. . l l llll' ‘9 . ' W Coupon expires Api‘ll 8,1979 r____

'l AprilZ419791-1rashnician/ three

HEW adds Wilkins case to charges I by AlfredCH-es more important reason for seemed to be a bitin the dark Hughes Durham. head ”We are jllt pleased to Sprots Writer g not being able to recruit the about the situation. mar-h at Georgia. wrapped it have someonewith thetalent Washington. N.C. resident. “Who is Dominique Wil- all up when he was contacted Dominique has. Lord knows Officials of the Depart- “It was not only a racial kins?" he pondered. on his Georgia plantation. we paid enough." ment of HEW released a decision. we didn’t have any All the commotion has not statement Sunday. promo warmups with sleeves long seemed to disturb Wilkins. ing that not allowing high enough. Chuck (Nevittl took He didn't seem to find it a school basketball star Dom- the last extra long we had." matter of North Carolina inique Wilkins to attend a Deano Smith. Daily Tar schools not wanting him but North Carolina school would Heel Coach-of-rhe-Year. did more a matter of financial sumo: be added to the list of racial not seem to be interested in sense. i '1 LATE SHOW charges being filed against Wilkins. Ashe sat on his brand new “Ill-IDDAT the state. “I really couldn't find a red Cadillac. Wilkins dis- Wilkins recently signed a place for him. he couldn't cussed the situation. TONIGHT letter of intent with the count to four" "Well. uh. like I enjoy University of Georgia where Smith did not seem to watching but I'd never play 11mpm. the black race is given an believe that it would be a in the ACC.there are like too equal opportunity to excel. problem suiting him out. many stars you know. Not “It is just a shame a fine “Well. Dudley is leaving that I’m not good enough but one more time I UCLE'6FDE'Y‘I'"" young man like Danny this year so I don’t believe I want to be the only star can cannot get into an institution that would be a problem." you dig it. I mean like what forthe hell-of—itll of higher learning in his said the Tar Heel hero. conference is Georgia in state." said HEW head man Carl Tasty of Wake Forest anyway." Joseph Calilany. “We are not ’ii3 going to overlook this one." Wilkins had earlier an- Pro wrestler signs letter nounced he had limited his choices to three ACC schools in North Carolina. His final to play footbaIIEFS‘tate prospects were limited to byRickPhlr ”I always wanted go North Carolina. State and SprotsWriter college." he exclaimed. “1 Wake Forest. good. I know, but wrestling The coaches oithe three State football coach Bo tough. football tougher. I universities all had reactions Rein announced Saturday still good. Them woll people to Wilkins' dec'nion and the signing of professional soon see." Califany‘s announcement. wrestler Blackjack Mulligan “I hadreached my quota of to a full grant-in-aid. It was also revealed that CONTINENTAL black athletes." noted State Mulligan. a rhinoceros of a Mulligan will major in AMERICAN headcouch Nowman Sloane. man. was thrilled with the Engineering. with a concen- “I don't think the alumni announcement. tration in concentrating. CUISINE would have allowed me to ”INMWS'MWIM have any more.” Gay sprols action SW “5° ”W“ m“ * Thisiswhathappsnswhenthegaysgettogetheriorairlandy . garnooiwhetaver. ‘l'hsylustcan'tkeepthsirhandsofleach .-’ other.Thiswastaltonatlastweelr'shornoseaualtouchfootbal

Jaime Combs Open all afternoon. sweetness?

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The Honorable MAYNARD JACKSON MAYOR or: ATLANTA. GEORGIA Monday, April 2, 8PM admission free Stewart Theatre

mrmaneriamms mums i ngeranddiaeaseamatillawayofnfefor. many. Pauertystilloppmessesmltitnxbs. no; mmnloddngfor springandsureer graduateewhohave aspecial outlodc on life. Special pecple,pe

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Security sacrifices student lacrossing Doak Field who‘came trampsingé

in ridgy redand white tennis shoes which t hell turf aywmaauatua The name of the victim Reports of what then scene found the victim "IIIMM was withheld pending notifi- happened are conflicting. slumped on the grass next to Dorm. chairman of Up swam" cation of the next of kin. Apparently a security guard a copy of Ecotopia. a Against The Fence. a newly- The incident occurred called out something to the futuristic novel that. ironi- formed protest group. de- The West Campus fence about wa-WM' student.whgdid not seem to cally has nothing to whatso- livered an impassionedap- a. Wm took tragic ‘sayth .' a. bear sedans-«wilting. A ever to do with lacrosse. pest for. justice..and-.,eml turn Saturday with the ly opened one ofthe gates'in shot then rang out and the shootings. death. or this nounced free beer for shootingdeath ofafreshman theeighbfoothighfencewith student fell in a bloody article. ' everyone after the rally. who had wandered into the a blow torch and began to sensationalistic mess. A mass rally was held “We cannot stand by ' lacrosse field. . can. the field.,_ . Those arriving on the Sunday afternoon to mom silently in the wake 3f this shocking event." Dorm or- ated. “It is far better that we stand by very loudly. But serioualy. fellow Zoo-People. we must demand a full and complete investigation of this incident.” “At the. same time how- ever, we must by sure that every side gets a fair and impartial hearing. By the way. does anybody out there have some tar and feathers I could borrow?" When asked why the shooting had taken place. Security spokesman Marvin Spokessaid.“It isour solemn duty to maintain the integ- rity of the lacrosse and soccer field. Wemust protect the right of students who hurl funny objects with various limbs across large spaces." However, no soccer or lacrosse games were being played when the shooting took place. When confronted with this fact, Spokes said. “Well. we also have to maintain the future security ofthe‘field. Iunderstand that the shootee was wearing tennis shoes with thou . .w . . funny little plastic ridges. A defiant second~grades attempts a dangerous daylight climb over ".6. State's AD. W's The heat slain of the feline controversy. pictures seconds after being fatally shot Saturday. are" photo by Larry Merrell Those ridges might not seem Casey's latest purchase: a mum-thousand dollar fence surrounding Peterson Elementary dangerous. but they can tear School. P.E.E.S. has reportedly produced more professional athletes than any other 0.5. the hell out of turf." elementary school. The youn'gster’sattempted escape ended in a tangle of barbed-wire atop the barrier. after which he was run through a gauntlet of stick-wedding lacrosse player. e Hushpuppies and pad clippings of the mind

1: Reassembly teams standing by. How for a slot? P'raps. P’raps not. Cancer felt hot? shux up for good and force you to improvise didn't write them. How about the old code? I’m ( soon remake codes? Please advise. Oh. shut up. Ounce for a schtupp?silencel) :he resr of the column.Ya"gol me there. giving it one last playback for old times’ sake. 2: /pllz advalz/. Remake codes. Re may 1: I dunno what th'hells wrong 'lh you guys. Blissful incoherence Moments: MAINSTREAMS: TRIBUTARIES Let's hear a bit of it before we dump it coats Key main roads. Me reign chauve. ll but we can't wait all day. Please advise. OF JUSTPLAINOLDGUYSLIKEUS. United forever2—n’l makes wavesya 'better hang on to pleut dons mon coeur comme ll pleut sur la 2&3: /kju/ (What? Cue. Cube? CUE B . yer divided. Free-yet unslaved. Hard yet soft? yourselfcertain’ unalienable rightshey I’m ville. Quelle est— ‘ What's your next line? I... uh... Remember / arry LISS You're catching on. Faithless yet believing. having a little get-together tonight and I’d love 1: Can’t read you. Static. Please advise on your blocking. Blocking who? No one. Jlrst Meek yet strong? By God. you’re closer than ‘ you all to join usgotta look out for number remake codes. Over. blocking. Blah king? Ifl were king I certainly you think.Closer to what than I think? Well, oneconnects each of us to the otherwhen you 2(8: 3): Cold sober? Moi? Sometimes. wouldn't be— No. you wouldn’t. You mean? light; Light meets moon meets cloud makes knowing how you think... How I think? You're break somebody's heartall you need isLove Remembered giddy whirling drunkness Exactly. Cbuld this be the moment we've been moonshadow. Moonshadowl Cat Stevens, me and I’m you. And we are all together. goo reign o'er meact nowget aheadthe victory of I (drimknessh’t not horrible sco’ish beastie?) walling, for? Probably not. Try this one: right? /sigh-of~exasperation./ you’re goo ga joob. Hexpert texpert yourself. I cah't thrill. the defeat of agonywinning is the only cluthlngthckitchen sink for stability. (Stability CIRCLE: Offriends. Of life. Of presence. Hand incorrigible. I am not made of cardboard. sir. follow your train ofthought atall. Infact. I ddp't lhingso it's no use pretending that you alone Cotter? No. just plain old rocksteadiness. to hand,(”Hand to hand" what? Combat?.No. Then what are you made of? Dreams. No even think I'm in the some station as you.) ,run the showthis is the way the worl— Enough Roxieddyneas? Your phonemes. not mine. Precisely the opposite. I still don’t know what good. Dreamsare made on. Ask Shakespeare. of the old code. The new code is ready. All Starry. Been on morphemes so long- 'Mork you’re talking about. I do. Then I should too. I'm not sure I could stand the smell. He’3 over 1: Are you guys”on drugs or what? When points: Remake codes are now ready. themes? Smortoss.) Aren't we the same? Yes. but I am different 400_ years old. y'know. I think you need can we expect the codes? If we don't st'a'n‘SObn Transmission begins... NOW. . same than yoiiHow about insame? Ouch. another moment. Shoot. As in “go ahead" or the material will begin to degradePLEASE 1: You guys cut that close... Looks like we 1:Stilltoo much static. Changefrequencies. Touche.To shame? Hush. You're wearing out as in “darn"? As in'both. Since that's the case. ADVISE. . . have a good Rebuild here. 2(3): Love to change frequencies. Too my parentheses.)(AlI n’ght. I'll use my own. I'll give you a whole slew of momehts. How 3&2: (Maybe we better transmit the 3&2: Let‘s hear a little 'of the new many goodnights, not enough good fcksjhs... Give me another moment. Lovely ambiguity many? Oh. bout three or four justasechusta codes. They're really getting itchy. They can’t codeOkay: —mil we drink the new wine— onlytlnmlgotlasdlfkhlalqowound up getting there. n'est-ce pas? I don't care how gooey sex? What abouta romance? The romance get itchy. they‘re allegorical figures. Says so in Do you recognize? Sure do. Here’s the mymlshsd Mlstodout ofshapoMois she had your too is. Give me another moment. Now. were conquered by the Barbarians. Now if you their contract. "Anyway, the codes aren't quite source listing. ' dark hart and that counts.for a lot. (Accounts Okay. SHADOW: Night. waves, clouds. moon, won’t let me proceed with these moments, .r I'll ready yet. Now don‘t look at me like that; I‘ 3:: Nooo... \ 'l Aprii2.1979/Traehnician/F:ive

Fountain fenced for Police raid tunnel, bust frolllcking finmen bong hitters by Adana-Namwen with the students' bitching." really too much. First. they ' l ‘SerutaefRetirw Casey said. ‘ fence in around Doak' Field .“Everyone knows this and now this. I. myself. am by MW In a surprise announce- placeisrun sothe alumni will organizing a mass protest. StaffWriter ment today. Willis Casey. keep sending in the dough. “We‘re going. to .have a athletic director. said that To get the dough we have to Bathathon." Appleton con— In one of the largest raids' the fountain in the student make the athletes win. who tinued. "().K.. this is how it's. in years. several students par!" center plaza would be fenced cares about the stupid going to work. Students will were apprehended in the in so the swim team would fountain being nice to look sign up to take a bath in the west campus steam tunnels haveaniceoutdoorfacility to out at? We want the money." fountain. Hopefully. we'll in possession of Inge a- practice in. Casey said with a gleam in have so many students and mounts of ' “The swimmers came to his eye. the marathon will last so substances. according to \3 meand saidtheyfelt slighted “If we have to. I guess we longpthe builders will never Raleigh police. . F.use-us because the football team. can come up with sometimes get to build the fence." “I think it looked a lot like baseball team and lacrosse when thenonathletescan use ._ .- .-.._-.... rmarijuana and our police t team got to practice outside the fountain." Haywood said beagle. Ernie. sure smelled l where they could get a tan. with a groan. “But I really something illegal down l butthe swimmers. who wear don't anticipate that much of thgre." said one of the l themost revealing uniforms, a problem. I mean. the Staffphotoby Chrisbeware arresting officers. John a had to practice indoors. students don‘t sunbathe in With theexistingDoall Field Fenceprovingtobe an inadequate barrier to various and sundry commonplaceshrdents. Director tight. where they were denied the pool. and it‘snot likethey ' of AthleticsWillis Caseyhas contracted with Central Prison to lease their fortress which is being presently transferred to book Among those arrested their chance to'soak up the can't see the water flow Field. “We'll keepthescumoutatanycost." Caseysaidquoting a roundfigureof ”0.000'a day for the new erection which wil werethe infamous“bong hit" rays." Casey said. through the wire fence. I be covered by a rise in student fees. cartoonists. Clip and Gitchy Charles Haywood. associ- mean Jeez. what's the fuss of'I'echnician‘s serious page. ate dean of student affairs. about. Raleigh Police said they declinedto comment. saying. “Don'tthestudents realize fortifies ’scumbag enclosu re’_ found evidence that .over a “We really didn‘t think the what an actual shortage of Casey hundred people had been students would notice. So land the athletic department by LucindaMcEIroy those goddamned students never climb that wall. I wish East Campus as long as I'm usingthe‘tunnels. Clipsaid in few showed up to vote in the has to work with? They used Staff Writer . off of Lee Beach forever? I had thought about this still king of the hill." response to this. “I don't recent student election. we to have the Riddick hot that This university would work a years ago. We could have Student activist Nick doubt it. Half of Tucker. were hoping they'd ‘be could easily be converted Director of Athletics Wil- lot better without all those walled in the whole campus Stratas said he had organ- Owen. and all those other apathetic about this too." into a pool. but no. the stupid lis Casey announced this trashy hippies anyway." and let no one in except the ized a resistance shit-in for hell-raib'ulg dorms are down faculty have to park there. morning the purchase of the Prison officials estimated clean-cut. neat. fraternity Wednesday when the wall is there on a good night. The swimmers as could be There also used to be the Lo..kside.dummy.ou= . 40-feet brick wall which now the move of the wall would types.“ to be flown in. ”We'll pack “They opened up the door expected. were ecstatic a- area by the coliseum. but surrounds Central Prison to cost $1 million and Casey said Lee Beach sothick they wont to the basement of Bngell sbout the idea. “Damn. I that's a parking lot too. be used to surround the Carter Stadium would be Newly elected Student be able to move that wall in dorm—that's way over on - wish I weren't graduating." What's a guy to do." lacrosse field. The hundred- sold to the Gay and Lesbian Body President J. D. Hay- here unless they kill- two east campus I think. anyway Dan Harrigan. All America concluded Haywood. with an year-old prison is now in the Christian Alliance to be used worth commented on the thousand students." peoplestarted downthere all swimmer said. Though plans exasperated look on his face. . process of renovationand for their national rallies. The prison wall being moved to When asked about possi- the"‘time since they didn't aren’t complete. the direc- ' Also as could be expected. officials agreed to sell the wall will be transported by Stale. ble student resistance to the have to fall down a man-hole tors would like to start the students werevery upset wall to State for the meagre helicopters fromthe Civil Air move of the wall Casey to get in there." ' constructing the fence as about the fence issue. amount of $500,000 to be Patrol. “I really don't care since replied. “We'll just shoot Chancellor Thomas ex- soon as possible. "Well, [tell you. they've Weatherforecast funded by students fees,. “The wall should be in I've already been elected," them down. I'm tiredofthose . pressed concern over the “Well. we.might wait until really done it thistime.” Sam Casey said. place by next Monday." he said. ”And I don't play kids having their way. Who, problem and Willis Casey the semester is over. That Appleton. junior in , engi- "Why let a good wall go to Casey said. “This will be football any more. so I don't do you think this university suggested that all the man way.we won't have to put up neering said. “I mean this is [ waste when we can keep great': those bastards could care if they fence in all of was built for. anyway?" hole covers be fenced.

l. ' .Quotuugeqaequfl l

- ’Big Shot’ reveals all,

frenzied fans beg for more by E.Z. Piece present. Joel’s sexual antics apparently appealed to Entertainment Writers more than just the females. however, as a young ' I. ' I say}; 4-.» -.v,.o;-2.-:.M§f-x : . .,.-: . u; Ear»- .s' ~. arr-x.1, v. -: ., . male.clad inwtighl ' s andsa..Car.olina. t-shirt, .4.» (V +0 .0 ; oygizrgmamelglmes “roek-n-relied” Saturday ~ leaped on them lungedrfor".Iocll'suiiod'y. ' night wheh'Whe Entertainer” Billy Joel paid a visit Rushing onstage. the road crew quickly disposed of to Reynolds Coliseum. Ihe gay lad, jusl in time for their finger snapping Shouts of"groovy” and “far out" could be heard as routine in “Stiletto." Joel appeared under a red spotlight and eased into the first haunting strains of “The Stranger." “I' guess you could call this a love story," Joel A movingrendition of“PianoMan," Joel's first big remarked. glancing at the deceased Tar Heel. “if hit. followed the opening number and left him you're sick!" drippingwith sweat. “It’s hot in here!" Joel cried. to which 10.000 excited females readily agreed.’ The next five songs proceeded uneventfully. So hot. in fact, that after playing “Honesty." “My HoweVer. the show was not. over yet. Noticing Life." and “Vienna," Joel keeled over from heat saxophonist Richie Cannata's increasing popularity exhaustion and nearly drowned in a puddle of his wit h the audience. Joel jealously drew a small pistol own sweat. Luckily. Nurse Jolly was on hand to during “Billy the Kid" and put Cannata in his place, administer mouth to mouth resuscitation. . never missing a beat. Fully recouperated after a short break, Joel returned to the piano and began “Live and Let Die.” As if on cue, the frenzied crowd rushed to the to the absolute amazement of the crowd. Cries of st age for Joel's production of “Big Shot." Caught up “Did Billy Joel write that song?" could be heard all in the intensity of the number, Joel whipped it out, over the coliseum. swinging his instrument in time to the music: “No he didn't. I did," cried Paul McCartney. who Yes, yes you had to be a big shot, didn't you just happened to be in the audience. Jumping to the You had to prove it to the crowd III”“.““Hre. stage. McCartney attacked Joel, who calmly pulled a Such a fuckin big shot l switchblade, and thrust the gleaming knife into All your friends were so knocked out Paul's left side. Wit h this grand finale, Joel and the members of his Looking down at McCartney lying in a pool of band left the stage, only to be called back by the blood. Joel said. “Sorry. I just get a little carried screaming crowd. away now and then." and began his next song, “Angry Young Man." “A bottle of whites . . . a bottle of reds," Joel sang. “I know this place seems pretty much like a bus beginning his first encore, “Scenes From an Italian station." Joel said. introducing his next song. “Let's Rest auranl try to bringa little atmosphere—La little sleaziness in But this was not enough to appease the here." music-=hirsly crowd; so for the second time Joel “Give me some sleaze lights." Joel exclaimed as he complied. returning sans coat and brandishing a donned a pair of dark glasses and strutted sexily Michelob. across the stage. erupting fantasies in every. female Finishing the song. Joel’s band left the stage. leaving him alone to rform a third and final encore number. A! the en of this emotional tune. Joel rolled his baby blues toward the audience and yelled “Good night Raleigh. Don't take any shit off of anybody!" Accompanied by two bodyguards. Joel and his hand rushd to his bus only to discover that it had been lowed by Security. and was now resting After Saturdaynight's concert in ReynoldsColiseum. BillyJoelcasualyposeswiththeexact sarna llnlte he used to polshoff Paul peacefully at Medlin Gulf. McCartney. .

Enemies of the College series annOunced

, by Jane Aire ' performance. This spectacular life-defying troupe women students may not leave their kitchens to StaffScfibbling Woman will open the series on September 13. attend this performance.) The 1979-1980 series will include: EOTC is a nonprofit organization devoted to The Enemies of the College (EOTC) announced " The Smithfield Community Opera performing hindering the pursuit of free education through their 1979-80 program today during a press “Tommy" with special guest tenor Jesse Helms . paternalism and to the creation of racial animosity conference held at The Royal Order of the Sheep as the Pin Ball Wizard. through forced interaction. This year, Califano guild hall in Chapel Hill. "" The Parapelegic Ballet performing newly cho pledges that EOTC will add to its task the revelation Joseph Califano. HEW secretary and this year's reographed versions of “Swan Lake" and “The ‘ of cultural activity as boring. painful experiences to honorary president of EOTC. enthused: “We've Nutcracker Suite." be engaged in only if one desires the fortune ofone's never been able to sign up such a rilly big shew as "‘ “Withered Lung"—a modern morality play in crochety. refined aunt. this one. I believe that it will stop the University ' which paraquat and nicotine battle for the alveoli dead in its tracks." .. of an innocent teen. Season tickets cost ten dollars and may be EOTC’s greatest coup was in contracting with the "‘ “Vaudeville of Yester~Year" starring Earl purchased at the Remedial Reading Center. NCSU SenatorJesseHslrnswilmalleaguestappearanceasthePln“ Kamakazi Acrobats of Japan. The Kamakazis "Loose Shoes" Butz. ' students will be admitted free to all events upon BI Wizard in the Srnitht'reid Community Opera's EOTC perform rarely, since the nature of the act requires “ Phyllis Schaefly‘s Roller Derby. (EOTC regretts presentation of a current registration and an inter- l . production of "Tommy." that a new company be trained for each that Mrs. Schaefly's contract. specifies that racial'date. T . imvmmo‘fiemfi-m.waxrrou v- . e yet/rm”' 'l I". 1

9. animals? “It‘s an unbelievably hor- emotional V'atatement to several officers around the rible situation.” Lilacbloorn Trashnician reporters. Student Center. said in a quaver'ing voice. “I “We're gonna nail every "We've called in our Prethiag. rabies~ridden just can't go home and look last one of those many specialSWAT team."officer attack dogs have been my little Pckinese in the face mutts. or I'll go berserk. F. W. Woolworth. declared. aalualting W any more." Thosebeastshavekill'edftmr “Our boys are armed with dudents h the finder". The dogs apparently are ofour best players. We were mace. extra-long leashes and Center Plaae. a rather driven to a mad frenzy by hoping to make the National the biggest damn rolled up wished spekeernaafor the sight of Frisbees flying Flingoffs this June. but newspapers we could find." the Divided of Student through the air. "The dogs thanks to those scum-ridden. Intrepid Tmshm'ct’ott pho- ' announced Sunday. appear to have been eondi~ spavined. four-legged mon- tographer Larry Merrell tioned to respond to a visual strosities we won't stand a managed to capture one of cue.” Animal Scientist B. F. chance." the attacks on film. “It was Associate Vice President Skynyrd said Sunday. MEanwhile. Campus Se- awesome." Merrell said. Gullah Lilacbloom, at least . curity. already strained by "One minute this guy was y fouratudentshavebeenkille Matthew Ovoid. president the shooting death of a peacefully picking up his i andldserioualyinjuredbya ofthe State Frisbee Federa- freshman Saturday in the ‘Frisbee. and the next he'd packofcraaedcaaines. tion, vowed vengeance in an lacrosse field, has stationed . been turned into Alpo."

Califano befriends blacks and bad grades 5,0.qu . Carter was quoted as minded everyone _ not to indicated thathepromisedto T.“ StuflWn‘ter ”’ Satiris- .“bui sally guys. or smoke, and then tearfufly help out these two friends " Joey sure tried. He attended recounted his days at State. later. At his Friday North Carolina State for a “I couldn‘t do shit right. so I 2‘31!9.; night, closed-to--the-press semester. andwasreal broke vowed I'd get even with news conference. President up when they threw him out. those bastards." Califano revealed that one James Earl Carter an- Imagine that. throwing of these friends later left =I"'U munced that Department of someone out just because he “The only people thay State for academic reasons. O Health. Education and Wel- couldn't pass a course in were nice to me were the Califano later appointed her fareSecretary John Califano education." blacks. Both‘of them were as an assistant. He hired '13?" has no formal schooling Califano. speaking from real nice," he said. “They Mary Berry. he said “to get ;; beyond the high school level someone around who can 'memmmmflmmmmMMthu-aw his Washington office re- didn't even smoke.” Califano ' stand me". Plaza. Faungmeeaneuldfiemm. lieu” i,_c:a:-:I.e:a:- {gens BOYS CLUB of Wake County ALL "csu FLYING CLUB PRE-MED/PRE-DENT Picnic. MCAT/DAT Review Ga 2211. W. WESTERN LANES MED/PRE-pear CLue needs help in coaching soccer. members must attend WNW in Apr. 6, 5:30. Between D.H. Hill a. 7.- 9:“) am. Organic Chemistry teaching music or drama. They an Dab at 1-m on Wed Your Polk Hall. Free. All interested 1:00 p.m.-Physics. 24 Ianes—billiards- Cactus Bar have an organ. For more into.. attendance is mandatory. Elec- members "9 “"0""- p.m. Biology. Apr. ill-7:“ (across Hillsborough Street) contact Volunteer Services. tlonsfor new otticerswill be held. 'mIrI'r SOMETHING exciting to Student Center. 737-3193. FLYING CLUB Ground School ”do?:3"!ContactStudentVolunteerCenter. Services737-3193. ’ BEWARE OF aduckin a redplaid will meet Thurs. 5:00 in 330 Dab. Present Coupon .Friday 8 Saturday SPECIAL Remembervolmteermrkeape— lacketl . 10% off on all eyeglasses .rlencecanbeputonresumes. CURRICULUM PROBLEMS? NCSU DEPT. of Foreign Lang. 5- ’ti/6pm fri. 8 set. only , Want advice on courses. instruc- Literatures 5. German Goethe Morel 088-0007 "cont-Lara “lama Imus." 'COMINGLV OUT: A BIRTHI’ is tors.doublemaiors. lobfields? All inst. Atlanta present 'Legal Ask a friend to come bowling— it's fun. “availabletree intheNI/Ip, 1stfloor Interested Econ., Accounting, 8. Problems of the Mass Media’ by attt-tcieAStudent Center:courtesy oi Business students come to Econ. Dr. Manfred Rehbinderot Univ. oi Society Curr. Day In Ballroom. Zurich, Switzerland.’Tues..Apr. 5. The Optical Shoppe Bring Coupon 8 Bowl Games for $2.00 Student Center. Apr. 5. moo-6:00. p.m., Brown Rm., Student LocATlo h,- CAN you SPARE 4 hours Apr. Center. Oral. ILocx FROM N. c. OTA‘I'I: .lLL Towns -_ .5 2i? YMCA day camp site needs STRESS WAVES. Sign up for CE Four Tues.-Apr. 324. 7-10 pm yard work done. Come loin the 493C for a credit course Pre--registration necessary. Dr. tun. Contact Volunteer Services. tall. Hour is to be arranged.tor next Turnbull. 7372563. Call immedi- Student Center. 737-3193. Course includes impact, explo- Lima-d Onrctm .0 WWI-l .7- ately. ORDER OF THIRTY and Three sions. earthquakes. seismic pros- Dun MURRAY MLIIOH. N.C. FOUR WEEK Female Sexuali membership applications may be pecting, etc. Taught by Dr. R.A. coursestartsThurs..Apr. 5.+5on picked up in 214 Harris Hall. This Douglas. Talk to him, 400 Mann - pm at Student Health Service. society recognises rising juniors l-Iall about course. Pre--reglstration necessary. Call tor outstanding leadership and WEEKDAY LUNCH. that-1:30. Or. Turnbuli, (when scholarship. Application deadline Baptist Student Center (across students only). 3MP? from libraryi‘ Casseroles. sand- COME PLANT SALE and Clinic spon- 'Creation vs. Evolution’ HearDr. wiches, salads. soups homemade sored by the Horticulture Club. Gerald Van Dyke, NCSU Botany breads,etc. Small group meetings Tye—Isa? TO Apr. 6‘7. 10-5 p.m. Kilgore bsmt. prot. speak at college LItIi. Mon. rooms available, plus large open Rm. 72. Great Plants tor dorm Apr. 2.9:01p.m.inthe Packhouse. dining room. Call 334-1975. ’ Mn- JOHN rooms! Ya'll carnal sor: Campus Crusade tor GAY AND LESBIAN Christian Christ. Alliance will sponsor a Sell-De- wow CARWASH Sat, Apr. 7. 10-5 pm tense Workshop on Mon.. Apr. 2. DINLEY’S Rain date Sun” Apr. 5. $2.50 min. SCHOOLOF PHYSICALI.Mathe- Brown Room. 4th tloor. LIFT? . Western Fried donation tor cars and vans. matical Sciences is having a Student Union. Come learn and Jo _ ND SAVE Exterioronly. Location: Reynolds picnic Apr. 5. 5:00 pm. under have tun. CHICKEN (beth Case). Proceeds to Harrelson Hall. Tickets on sale DOl from students"a“,and depart.arm;offices,Hesse‘ EDER.special TQOST celebrating LARS LWSSDQIIKL59m....- 3:30 am! Passover, led by Rabbi Marlin *0 7 (‘ontplcte'l‘ranspdrtationf’roy Plotter AG. iNST.CLUBm0¢iingApr.10. COMO. Beiiield. 6:15 p.m., W'ed., Apr. 4. iders ines, roll salad bar .fl. Williams Hall Auditorium. SOCIETYOF WOMEN Engineers Baptist student Center. 51.25 for New atticers will be elected. p.m., Brawn meal. Reservations call 334-1875. Hotdog cookout, Apr. 12.5:It. Meeting, Tues. election. Union- Sponsor: Cooperative Campus Room. Otticer Ministry. ' EMI- WgfimHdmy 10m Carbide tour and awards banquet Ilitl I... hula-u cannery": a plans. ACMMEETINGApr.3.7p.m..225 ROAST BEEF SOCIETYOF WOMEN Engineers ‘ Dan. Dr. Anthony Hearn will il'l \/l‘.~il\‘l wild...“2'.p"3"”:m Plant tour oi Union Carbide speak on ’Symboiic Computlon Merton latteryIn Asheboro, Thurs. Apr. and- Mathematical software.' Plotter 5. Meet in front of coliseum at e Electionsfornewotticerswill also roast beef sandwich, REStdENCEllt‘st summer“HAL-Lsee. roomseven. torIn um be held. WM Wm). BM BICYCLE TO CALIF. Anyone SIZZLER'S fries, salad bar 'mid-hmmoan). one-m FLYING CLUB meeting in 330 whois interested. hasexperiences Dab at 7:!) to discuss plans tor toshare,orequipment to sell, call attending Thunderbird Air Mike at 782-1550. 9-5. SUPER STUDENT SPECIAL ”per Newmembers invith Show. 833-0315. otherwise oud'lTlllldey only Roy Rogers Family Restaurants indeMeroomer Sled/sin- Western Blvd.- Hillsborough Street M_ I”3;"! . ’— W'dance-mas .m—usserestau we»"M, Interested.W The Place of Quality RepairW Do you read us? this!Mum Psychology Fail English electives in reading and writing Gent so'et new. ear or. Dr..leremeE CollnedgePoint momsoouroumvouesnnmm. Films. m‘.h. DMCl A doseencounter wididiversepoetr'c forms . a litesentetlot: or GROUND BEEF SPECIAL , ' ,4 I" , . , Studies'In Poetry, ENG staff FREE Fimzmn‘ In ‘ South SoundBerso PLUS Beverage and All-You-Can Eat l atyseeWilim Ia’state F, 'Note: ’The ntpfache- 1 _ Jimmy'GoldstorJ SALAD BAR $2.69 Using words wellIn the world of work-for fun and profit. duled tor tonight has been 3100 Old Wake Forest Rd. withdrawn byMGM. 601 W. Pence Street IBusiness Communication,ENG Profs. Keiton and Covington BETA LAMBDA Chap. of PLU ti»: “ , cur THIS coupon and come to our alllounces seminar by Dr. More Sizzler for an excellent value. Baked The very Best audiois from our own tradition-Thoreau, Twain, Last 2 Days! potato or french fries and Sizder (out Hemingway, and others. laid.Hillpress'The History,Apr.of the9.Drug.4:10 included, PLUS crisp dinner salad and m;In new. Discussionot Tonight 9pm only choice of coffee, tea, or soft drink. Major Amorican Writers, ENG staff Narmaceutical lndutirY. More than one student may use this mam2‘130amnterestedstudents Tues. 9 Er 11pm coupon. Paintings, movies, buildings, novels, drama, and poetry in OilerExpiesAptiS,1979 HISTORY ‘cLua will sponsor a stamens. .. modem socieIe.ty Green Rm. SpecPro English--Liter and Art, ENG 298A, Prof. Max Halperen t ‘ Tues..t Center.7:” p.m..On. Beers 5. assaults willdiscuss'Chlna iookson the. World Interviewing, investigative reporting, and feature wn‘fing. FRESHMAN Tech. Society Inset- Student Covarnment Reporting and Editing, ENG 315, Prof. Rod Cockshutt Ing'.'.,Tues Apr. 3.7:...9pm 122 of UNC-Chapel Hill presents Riddick. Freshmen in Engineer- Iagwlll benetittrornthis meeting. Horror, humor, and happiness in the Victorian novel. NCSU Young Democrats Club British Novel of the 19th Century, ENG 363, Prof. Elliot Engei meeting, Tues.. Apr. 3, 5:1) p.m. Springfest thereon Rm., Student Center. All , God and the gods, the fall and exaltatrbn of man. interested persons please attend. an outdoor concert April 21m Kenan Stadium Classical Backgrounds of English Literature, ENG $5, LASTais.CHANCESale times:tor EIT ReviewMon~ ,Mann Hall porch Emmi starring Prof. Doris Laryea m--Wed. at Riddick It. Cost 815. Cell for more into. Timmy Buffett The warp and woof of great European literature. twiet‘hs ecial guest Contemporary Literature I (1901-1940), ENG $8, CAFETER/A RESUMES plinners Prof. A.S, Knowles also Lovers, murderers, zoos, and drunkarkds on me stage. We invite all State students and Modern Drama, ENG. 480, Prof. Cindy thNantucket MacKethan faculty to come dine with us. Justifying the ways of God to men. ‘ Tickets are available at the Milton; ENG 561, Prof. Frank Moore We have daily, 13 different SchoolKids in Raleigh, Chapel Hill. ‘BEST RESUME meat dis/ids," ‘13 different . Greenville. WDBS. WDNCWDCG SERViCE . in Durham. Stewart Theatre at Check with the'Instructors listed for more information on these vegetables ahd 14 different courses. Sime NC State University and the délicious déSserrs! We also Carolina Union have a 26 item Salad Bar. 2 on the Chapel Hill campus. Check with your advisor abouthow to satisfy humanities requirements. ours:1 15and4«8Monday Saturday All tickets are $8.00 0 an all. day Sunday AprillSN/Truhnici-I a“! v. b’fll‘ffI .i N.C5. You. Ilt'l‘zsnsr XAM

QunL'tflItulww TlS‘l' Inertia“shim Apathy cyre

We really don't care. fills is a: f THIS is A = 1933 is Mr. A. (inks. OMM ll- Svroslftoly- Tflls ‘5 R A Hubcap. B. Hue-til») Linus!“- PrOUd mom 3. Foot LalL. A. Alon» SLOAN- B_ (Lain-link “and. C. Nollyvfipes.‘ congressmen and lawenforcement officials C. Elzpknut Tull). 3- suflill‘9l'“ an“ C. wak wujw's Lat. :D_ NoT ”out, 35,”. Students, mess with that stuff more than they do, it’s no 1) No c a; u“ “we "’ 3'3‘ . l. Even thoughldon'tgoto State, and I fun for the students to do it any more. “V ' n , ‘ ' C. Jock Sreap- D. A gnarl 3MP W- 7"“ is 5' would neverputfoot on thatcow university,l l proposét‘l'herefore, that hundreds of E. All oi the AbovE. Elpmujgloos wrap“. ' do occasionally”follow campus activities. campuses of 3. Lo usy Denwldg‘ ll. “snow-3t Sta-u Concering the recent Student Body fencesbe erected all over the every college in America, not just State. That 2. Tuis is A: - ”‘5 It!“ "‘5 Suvt‘luu: ‘ President election, I feel that the students will give the students, our hope for future % 1"“ ‘2‘. . 1)." P” .y: 3- Aa-Efltlulred. I made the best possible choice. Hayworth’s prosperity, health peaceand happiness, the Blakufluk. four points and experience make him the O UCl‘ A. tr“a O'.e . C. '- perfect boy. Besides. he's trustworthy, material they need to vent their energies A. ”2'; Fleitk‘lASugtt. 8. Rf; RuWusn‘ ‘ D. 09* .1 10“.. properly It will paygenerous dividends'in our Mifl‘tieuiuJ. intelligent, and cleans behind his ears at least A. Monti» woatk km. c_ My. D, 6A1)! once a day. Good choice. future lassure you. 13. Yrs. C; No. D. No efiur'efl. B. A Sake 505316. Mite-d Mommie Hayworth Hiram P. Swakhammer President Acme Fence Co., Raleigh Capitalist writes We hope you’ve figured it out by now, Solution. but in case you’re one ofthe slow ones...this Recently, lots of State students have been ain’tforreal. TheTechnician staff hopes our Iagree wholeheartedlywith yourprevious threatening to tear down the west campus AcCompIishment... annualApril Fool's Day edition is enjoyable editorial on the issue of the Middle East. fence. and is taken [or what it's worth—nothing. Contrary tothebeliefsof many,encouraging Not being a student, I believe I can offer an Man. did‘l goof on this one! Please don’tsue us; with what this thing cost peace in theareaisnotthewaytogetit, and objective viewpoint asadetached observer us we couldn’t afford to pay up. wipingoutthe whole areawith nuclearbombs who is totally unaffected by the whole affair. Charles Haywood would get rid ofthewhole crowd ofthemand [believe it’s rather obvious that tearing Associate Dean of Fencing Affairs would alsobeeconomicallybeneficialby down of fences is a legitimate outlet for bringingoiltothe earth'ssurface withouteven students to vent their frustrations, especially drilling for it. Suchproficient insight denotes a since we all know they long for a return to the _ praised Problem mature understandingoftheworld situation'of days of protests and rioting like in the Sixties. today. and I am greatly impressed bythe the problem is they don’t have anything else He sure did! What Student Government needs is a writer’sabilitiesand intellect. to raise hell about. They wanted to use things Sally Student king-sized “Ck in the 355‘ like marijuana and uninhibited public sex as SR NADA Tom Hendrickson Ronny Reagan issues, but since it’s been discovered that and 17.999 others Nick Stratas Prat. PolySci

Sifieds Hall-Swain Lecture Series ’79 HEY wrNFnED. HAPPY BIRTHDAY Jimmy JOBS: Janitorialwork at night for YOU WILL grow up to write ; JUST FOR YOU ; tram swinging chick,Happythe twoa-DayIlt Burkens from your fan club. students. Students staying in tortunes tor bubble gum. leprechauns, Archiebald Harry, Raleigh during summer get ist April 4 7:30 Tunaflsh, Bernie. Eloise,anddear LOST: plastic trained gIasses in priority, 832-5501. beBUYin theA newgrooverecordagain.today. You'll old Ralph. Guess Who? beige case. it found. call 82l-5278 students, faculty, staff nights or weekends. Reward. LIVE LIKE a tried 999 with your of the University System We ...... t°si;.%::'°ia*21".?.‘23.zi"é".li Roderick Hart 2:1' sNAPPEDa Creative par' :eEh'EnPiI mp or you" "m rum: “’5'“ '“l- 5m” rlillcheal aim. it_ found. please A-EB££_QHBl§IlAN_5§lENQE i m... t... at... mm... ”mm- W""""‘ "”""‘"""‘ people for advertlsl ornotlon. TOMORROW YOU will receive a Walnut Room Student Center LEQIUBE by Good pay. 409-1045 (Durham).no pr ring—on the telephone! WILLIAM CORRELL, CSB Rhetoric of the Presidency "THERE‘S ONLY ONE REAL EGO‘“ wed. Apr. 4. 1979 at 3:50 Blue Room, in Student Centerp r . r- . . ‘Ibill I le\la‘|‘i Ii‘l‘ll’ilii " It'fl l'.. .‘I “‘ lurl'anany ‘ A’s-sin II a a . . p :.a...... W . -..r4r.. 4- ”a: a ‘- ~ --—m¢ nu. u-. 3 *r‘rA‘RESOURCE CENTER EveryoneVVeIoome . ~ ~ FOR SEXUAL HEALTH Abortion, Birth Control, Counseling Sex Education 313 Haworth Dr. By, Appointment Only 781455$ IMPROIIE VOIIR MEMORY WITH

OPENINGSIOR CAMP COUNSELORS A few positions remain on the summer staffs of Camp Sea Gull (boys) and Camp Seafarer (girls) SOVBEAII PRODUCT on the coast of North Carolina. The camps feature sailing, motorboating, and seamanship, plus all usual camping activities including swimming and a wide variety of major sports. Early June through mid-August. Good salary; food and lodging furnished; plus the opportunity of participating in an outdoor experience that will stimulate a counselor's own growth and development. Qualifications include ability to instruct in one phase of the camp's program. a genuine interest in young people, and excellent references. Quick answer upon receipt of letter of ap lication which should include a brief resume training and experience in area(s) of the camp program In which you are best qualified FREE to instruct. Apply to Hyatt Taylor, Director, Camp It Is Sea Gull and Camp Seafarer. P. 0. Box 10976, Raleigh. To N IT é mu toll mu mar North Carolina 27605. ‘l'I—l Au F“ R 1 DAY 6.9.}!le rossrur ill lllll'lillIlE voun lilElllllW IV mum illitlllllE A CHOLINE IS A FOOD SUPPLEMENT THAT COMES FROM SOYBEANS. IT IS THE FORERUNNER OF ACETYLCHOLINE, A BRAIN COMPOUND THAT IS ESSENTIAL FOR THE SMOOTH FLOW OF'THE NERVE IMPULSES. STUDIES ‘ Sigma Chi SHOW THAT EXTRA CHOLINE IN THE DIET INCREASES LEVELS OF ACE— TYLCHOLINE IN THE BRAIN. . Presents: RESEARCHERS AT THE NATIONAL INSTITUTE OF MENTAL HEALTH REPORT —- "CHOLINE SIGNIFICANTLY ENHANCED SERIAL RECALL OF UNRELATED WORDS AS MEASURED BY THE NUMBER OF TRIALS RE— QUIRED. FURTHERMORE, THE ENHANCEMENT WAS MORE PRONOUNCED IN ‘SLOWER' SUBJECTS THAN IN SUBJECTS THAT PERFORMED WELL" (LIFE SCIENC ', VOL. 22 NO. 17 1978). 90 MINUTES AFTER TAKING CHO— LINE ONE OFEEHE SUBJECTS WHO NORMALLY REQUIRED 10 TRIALS TO MASTER A LIST OF DIFFICULT WORDS REQUIRED 5 TRIALS, A 50 PER- CENT IMPROVEMENT! WHAT WILL CHOLINE DO FOR YOU? YOU WILL KNOW BY ORDERING A 30 DAY SUPPLY FOR $9.95. YOU MUST ACT NOW TO BE INCLUDED IN THE April 1-4 NEXT PRODUCTION RUN OF CHOLINE WHICH WILL BE AVAILABLE SOON.' SEND CASH, CHECK. OR MONEY ORDER FOR $9.95 TO: Field Events Mon. S- Tues. at (3:00 . -A n-LAKEwTeaentses INC Pth”X1436 Derby Darling Wed. at 3:00. KthT ,‘N.c. 28501 at: the StLJdent Center NAME ADDRESS any STATE ‘r- ‘3 4.. ..—-..a~v-u...... is. _ dun/Tm / April 2, Ian

(tame. ll woqWhat-L flu ola qfeen “to Larr Manet! dare“! “I“: aeadnaelee dumpsey truck was to pick can take of this running and Sostealthilytheycrept. 0f that and all the roaches seruteat rotide upin lessthan9 minutes. and hiding, running and hiding. the 1000. 500 survived the will head back for the they wouldn't have any trash We‘re going to come out in Harris lot and Cultural ex-cafeteria where the food They say it happened a and oh my God what was he the open and fight." , Center crossing and they stench iseverraunchy." they way out back behind the going to do? He thought for a moment. inched their way past West said: put his eensy front leg up to Campus beach and up. up. up parking deck dempaey “Get out you dirty and So they did the only dumpsey. The old black roaches." he began to his chin. scratched into Lee and Sullivan. conceivable thing. After the watchguard had gone for he continued. “What would be pairingoffon each floor to go lunch (he took his daily fl scream. “Out. out. out." an absolutely cozy place to and make their way into the smush-a-roach campaign from his huge panicked. And quickly and take up residence? stench. filth of crusty pots failed. the studnets led an all minute break without the formal march in “It's goota be warm in the and pans and empty peanut out fight to extinguish the green dependent about 10:82 which they had crept in they winter and cold in the bar‘ jars. vermfin. A contest was held am. when there were the scattered unorganizedly and summer. extra super nastly And Noah saved two of to find the largest roach. and least people at Robbie's Ribs . somehow met under Harris with bread crumbs. dried every living creature. that they did 'it and it was in and Fried Chicken at the Hall where the old cafeteria broccoli syuck in various and they may live and reproduce. Bragaw. Andtheysaidit was corner of Hills and Borough. used to be (roaches like the lots of the leader of the pack that They came a-sneaking in a smell of old and rotten food .sundry corners and And they did it. It was a was gibber than a grunchy. oneat atimebehind the huge and the stench was still ishy squishy sour milk which god-given goft todirtydishes green dumpeey where no has curdled into little piles in and frazzled studnets who So they thought the roach present though the cafeteria. underwear drawers and henceforth entertained problem was eliminated human eye could chance ' has been used for business‘ cases. because they'd exterminated upon themThe leader of the purposes several years pillow guests to watch the smash-a- the leaderbut it wasn’t and it And you can't get the group of about 1000 said. hence. Dirty socks are a neces- roach-and-watch—its-gishy- exterminator out there in “Come quietly and we’ll soon I sary living quarters some- . guts gush goryly contest. isn’t and roaches continue to those big dorms. the admini-I-w...‘..._..‘_‘_.m....a—a...__-...._.u..-, bein safe territoryinsldethe The leader of the group what stale and mustly from And they gushed and scour crusted forks and stale stration tells the students.‘ large green garbage can." (He was the damndest. the once a month washing gushed and gushed those bread crumbs and nest in “Why anything strong So they crept and crawled darndest roachyoueversaw. ritual. gallantly gleaming roaches. grungy socks with molded enough to kill all those ever so quietly until they measuringallof22-and-a-half -And they pooled their “00000. look at that one toes. roaches will surely wipe out' were undercover. “Oooeeell” hugometers which is pretty crustly heads together gush." a student gasped in And the studnets kepp all the students.” they say in I one said in exultation. “Look near the size of a pregnant (they'd been .under the, glee. He had bashed browns theirRaiaiaiaiddd!!! handy to concern for the students' at all this food." And they hooploffer that just ate 3 garbage a lot lately) and and mushroom for supper. vanquish the many-legged well--being. commenced to eat and eat bweeptitods who had been came up with a most Andthey never stopped to creatures who creep stealth- And then you see them , and eat. sunning near a twibberring satisfying and gratifying think that if the dirty dishes ily. stealthily in the night and pause. “H,"ey one whispers. And by land by the old creek that continued pasta solution. They'd be dorm and dingy dresswear were disappear into tiny concrete “that ain't a bad idea." black watchguard crept back gordzio.) roachesinresidence with the removed that the roaches holes (except for those who School's out. School’s out. ever so quietly and caught Thisleaderhe. said.”Now dorm rats. “Yeah. yeah. would leave—at least that's are brave enough to face an No more pencils. no more ‘ I ~ , ‘ them in the actof devouring hear this all you scudzyzoo yeah." they chorused in what the physical plant told , angered studnet waving a books. No more teacher’s his trash that the dempaey roaches. I‘ve had about all I unison. them anyway.“Just clean up flapping fly flipper). dirty looks. . by But:Redeye ************************************** Writer " Starting with next semes- Qlosfl/Vt". . "end of +hc. Horticulture 066. “Com- bustion of Latin American HS 666 Lac '1 Flora." will be a three-hour n a’l.fi"”I I. course with a lab each week. '.r)' "are". If Lab fees are expensive (335 67 per lab) and any missed labs must be made up. The instructor for this 3mm Dams: \. ”ML ,- course. Dr. Ted Hugh Cobb I J' (THC) explained the grad- Pf . mg. \l ' “What. we're concerned about in this course is that the student get an in-depth ’..\ l.’ understanding about the ,v . conibustion of Latin Ameri- }i Blow» IluMl can Floraand itseffecton the . human condition—particu- . ‘5 '1 larly the human mental a .- condition." j Dr. Cobb went on to say ’s that there will be no i Rifle!) 1;. __ particular academic or intel- é ’r. . . _\ lectual requirements for Sf." photo by Larry Merrell. feats!» up ._7_/___..’._..:-_-, ' ' \‘ students taking this course. . I \- “Any dope will do." Cobb FDNL KAI. L. said. E H.“ .e When askedabutcurves in S \2. the course. Cobb explained. ,. ‘1‘ Buzz 7 \‘.._. __ “I think that all my students I w\ . -L , are capable of A's. I would ments to herald our womanly with the counter-revolution- plate-glass window. The 90 no 150 consider my teaching ability yielding to the Call of ary ease of natural gait. satisfaction of the shimmer- ' substandard if not every Nature. Only yester morn. my ing shards of glass mounded Tine (Minutes) student became the head of ‘73th Yea. for the designers o'r the tractors and harves— bring us out of the Valley of moral m‘e-ness was stricken ters brought me to my knees the class. by the unbearable sight of a on the concrete. 1.0th o e o o o o o Cobb pointed out that bySnowstorm Yankeeland - mannequin in sneakers and students should not worry overalls posed Sisters! You too must cling B°”3 —- ‘—— - - about falling behind in the Tight straightskirts em- before the now to your hair-skirts! If Cookie course and having to cram brace the strong. sisterly Kff‘lfs public eye in a store window. needs be—strike the capital- beforetheexlm. saying. “An calves of our campus avant— This plastic figure mocked all istic pawns! Set the Earth- Teelwiciau IIII’II‘ ounce of prevention is not garde. Spike-heels totter Comfort. We stumble across shoes on Fire!Tossa bomb at BRouuif necessarily worth a pound of with the winds of revolution the Desert of Womanly Pain a jeans store! cure." ——the invigorating wobble to the front of the New Wave —guided by a heavenly row 595)“. Les Bedes Femmes.’ Vous Woman. daring to bobble of add-a-beads by day and a avez toute perdre sans vos burningdisco dress by night. fers.’ so, into new lands. new eras— witnesses with the spectre of U! 63!POI J'mu- r fighling the lewd ranks of Too long have we tarried in a sylph shucking off her our unfettered sisters who the. Dogpalch of Sloth. only rightful earthly burden of ’h ganow JIM”. P3094 still lag behind our unerring attire... Convulsed by adren- \+ ‘le search for the perfect peace Daisy Mae to help us, ictic passion-I hurled my RiciapZerep-Otnac them all around her. With oranges left on the trees. By Assocation looked with in- of slave fashions—slave gar- corrupting fresh young souls charm braclel through the heels SeruteafRetirw the old lance. while no one the time the knights came ‘ tereston the goings-on ofthe- was looking. she stabbed it back. there were no oranges French. They gathered all The Knights of the French into one of the oranges. left on the trees. With the coaches of the American vieme'saaII .IIoIII Suns court left their ladies to pass With a cry of pure astonished faces the knights universities and decided on a -pIo.IquIa uoailunp out uI IIIIs the day embroidering their happiness at her accomplish- saw that this year the export plan of action. an Kat”, (,saIpcI .IIeuI puv great heroic conquest. After ment. the young girl danced of oranges would be zero. All American universities ‘sailumo a few hundred years these around the orange grove The California and Florida would plant orange groves. Io Iaodxa pue Isa/(mu poor ladies decided that the with her beautiful orange on producersjammedwith glee. take the lances out of the .IIaIII pOABS aouuad I051ququ time had come for them to the end of her stick. The This wastheiropportunityto museums and teach their out eIIIIM 'aoInf azuuao show their men that they other ladies of the court beat the French in the export young people the game of pus ‘assoaaeq 1° lJOdS at“ were good enough to be able . looked back shocked. of these golden fruits. Ships Lacrosse. They would show 103 saIaI peIIun out man to kill a few dragons It happened that on seeing were built. Bonies full of the the French! Io .(aoIs alI‘l SI quI my . themselves. her bright face. the ladies now expensive fruit left the The trouble was.ofcourse. uouaounuo petuaIuoo So. one day when the decided that they too would American docks to far-away that oranges do not grow in a peIIZIIs u‘patsum flquIoN orange-groves were ready to see ifthey could get oranges. places. every climate of the U.S.. It IlIlIV" 'pauIIcona .IaIIIouc be harvested. the ladies They ran around the orange The French knights tighta didn't matter: the Florida “‘OJIAJOS pooj out .10; aoInf dressed in the old clothes left grove jumping up and down ened their mouths. locked and California producers ammo" 'paanpap sIIzIoIIIo behind by their errant lords. with theirknight‘5 old their poor ladies in the would sell their oranges ‘ out Io euo “'aoInf anucaon. can;byLawphotoGeneSta" They marched out of the lances inserting the poor dungeons to finish their. wholesale to all the universi- humour.) castles with the lances left oranges in the end oftheir embroidery. and consulted ties that could not grow aoInI .IoI paqocna sIeu forgotten by the knights. sticks. each night on what they must them. Plastic Christmas q‘llM sIIaIIs paIuaaquan Marching and singing' Their fanciful imagination do to break the American trees were planted on the os patsem aq Iou pInom they went through the fields. ran wild. The oranges were boom. fields and the oranges were saxueao out Io saaInf out quI ‘lhey wereladies preparedto the fire-breathing dragons“ “Americans.' they decid- tied to the end of the paaepap sInIoIJIo A'IIsaaAIun demonstrate their great they had decided toeliminate ed. “loved sports. If we could branches. out ‘KaM snquazluI ue III capabilities. Yet as it in their journey. They spent find a way in which oranges Teams were organized. -spIaI_I .IIouI paJa/Ioo saaueao happens somanytimesin the‘ their day killing the oranges. were used inra sport. they new uniforms purchased. out Io aoInf am Iain sum Mtzs groups of organizations, running and jumping until will want to try it too." and tons of oranges were 1(an annoarKIuo at”, -I.Iods there was one who went the night grew cold and they All the French knights got used up by the teams each meu .IIaIII .Iaao uIscIanIue against the tide. grew hungry. Their faces together and organized- a timethey practiced. US. had 1° ll“! 3.19M ‘auIIaunauI It was the youngest girl. bright with glory they went World Series of Lacrosse used up all their oranges. out uI ‘sueoIJauIv aqj‘ pale and golden as the back‘to the castle. (the name of the young girl The French jumped with m. Foubiu mam. weW' .. oranges in the trees above After that eventful day. who had destroyed the glee. The Americans even . aaoaduII [wouuoa belogsuckedupandcaned oweyaswoflhlesatrlflea. her head. Her mouth tasted the ladies of the court went French economy). started to import French .IIaIII quoas .IaIIII papIoap andgreenandfullollile. Fornow. thecrlapydrynesscrackled. andthe of oranges. She could smell to the orange grove to kill The American Athletic. oranges. It was better than qouaag 3'" suoxup mullll’l hose.