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Underworld: Awakening (2012) Directed by Mans Marlind, Bjorn Stein

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Underworld: Awakening (2012) Directed by Mans Marlind, Bjorn Stein Cryogenic Family By Fearless Young Orphan Underworld: Awakening (2012) Directed by Mans Marlind, Bjorn Stein Things may have cooled down between the vampires and werewolves, their centuries-long war ceasing thanks to the “diplomacy” of Death Dealer Selene (that is, her tendency to kill anyone who interferes) but now a new problem faces the denizens of the night: lousy smelly humans. Yes, it seems that humans have discovered the existence of vampires and werewolves. Seeing these afflictions as viruses that need to be quarantined and eliminated like a bad disease, the humans impose military law (worldwide? I’m not sure) and exterminate every vampire or werewolf they can unearth. Selene and Michael are on the run again . well, for a minute. And then they are captured, knocked unconscious and frozen. Yep, frozen. Last we heard from Selene and Michael (back in 2006!) they had finally managed to get themselves free of the prejudices of the vampires and werewolves and be a happy couple, as supernatural couples go. There was another Underworld movie in 2009, Rise of the Lycans, which was excellent but which had nothing to do with these two, instead telling the tale of Lucian and Sonja, the couple who started all the trouble way back when. So it’s been six years since Kate Baking-Sale was called on to portray Selene and, unfortunately, looks like Scott Speedman was busy and couldn’t show up to play Michael. That’s always a little bit awkward, when an actor can’t or won’t turn up to play an (assumedly) popular role. There are a couple ways to handle this. One is to simply replace the actor and trust that the audience won’t be too disappointed. I think that could have worked, because while Scott Speedman’s Michael was sweet and believable, he wasn’t really the star of the film. Much harder to replace Selene. Another possibility is to either have the character killed off or on a secret mission – that’s less effective, I think. Everybody knows that Michael should be in the story because he was the thing that brought out Selene’s heart. Killing the man off in between movies would be pretty rough. And a secret mission seems silly, even for a werepire. Er . Scott? Still, a third option, and rather the worst one, is to do what Awakening did, which is to indeed have Michael played by someone else and then very carefully . well, actually not very carefully . pretend that it’s still the same guy, having the actor stand with his back to the camera or with his hair hanging down in his face, or have him quickly transform into his werepire persona so that the makeup hides the fact that he’s a new guy. And then, you know, make sure that he’s in the movie without really being in the movie, like have him locked in a fridge or something while Selene attends to business. Perhaps this does not bother others overmuch, but I do not like it when an actor is obviously not present and a movie tries to act as if he is. It’s like a kid trying to get away with lying about something by constructing an over-elaborate drama around an incident. So that colored the movie for me (haha, and it needed it! All blue and black, like it was, get it?), that constant, awkward feeling that they didn’t want me to notice that not-Michael was in a fridge rather than in the movie because they didn’t want me to dwell on the fact that it was not- Michael. Selene was also in a fridge but she is released twelve entire years later by unknown hands and finds herself in the bowels of a science lab. If there is anything I have learned over the years, it’s to never trust a science lab in a sci-fi or horror movie. They are inevitably up to no good. This lab is run by Nice for the evil scientists to hang onto her leather gear, just in case! Stephen Rea (an actor I absolutely adore) who is the man in charge of eradicating vampires and werewolves. From what I can tell, he elected to hang onto not-Michael and Selene because not-Michael is a hybrid and Selene is a stone cold fox – well, and she has a little something else going on too, which we’ll get to in a minute here. Anyway Selene escapes and proceeds to kill absolutely everybody. Her victims are humans, a new development. I seem to recall that in other films, the vampires and the werewolves were fairly careful not to kill humans, but being in a fridge for twelve years has made Selene bitchy, and humans are now expendable. She kills about 400 of them, then werewolves attack (!) and she kills about 40 of them. Hey, I thought werewolves were extinct! Selene hurries off to, I don’t know, do something not fridge- related, and meets up with a Scarecrow, a Tin Man, and a cowardly Lion. I mean, she meets up with a handsome vampire from the last coven struggling along, a detective who is curious about the sudden resurgence of werewolves in a world where they are supposedly eliminated, and a really weird little girl who changes into one scary-ass hybrid when she’s pissed off. The little girl is Eve. Surprise! She’s Selene and not-Michael’s daughter. Apparently Selene went into the fridge pregnant and at some point, they What a lovely little girl OH SWEET JESUS! thawed her out and took her baby. Eve is actually kind of an awesome character, a lovely and brooding little girl, but they don’t prettify the monster she can become. She’s quite a horrifying bit of nasty. Moments between her and Selene, as Selene comes to realize who the child is, are some of the more effective in the film. Eve is naturally wanted by the scientists, but the reasons why are far less scientific than they are toothy and gruesome. Selene is naturally determined to protect her child, who is all that she has left of not-Michael. There is a massive hidden plot to uncover, another play for power by those damn annoying werewolves, and once it is revealed, turns out that it’s not a half-bad conspiracy for a movie of this caliber. I didn’t really see it coming. Of course, I was doing my best not to over-think matters. So, plotwise, Awakening isn’t too bad, though it does not quite live up to its predecessors because it is relying too much on stories already told. It was true that Underworld and Evolution were markedly improved by the knowledge I gleaned from Rise of the Lycans. Now it seems that Awakening is hoping we’ll incorporate everything we’ve learned so far into this movie, so they need not bother to evoke much real emotional power. That is why the moments that do have power stand out so sharply. I already mentioned those between Selene and Eve as being effective. Charles Dance makes an appearance as the vampire clan leader, and he’s a marvelous actor, even in stuff like this, so his scenes have certain gravity about them. He is a man trying to hold together what is left of his species by hiding rather than sticking his neck out. Selene needs Michael at her side, that’s my solution, whether or not Scott Speedman was in the role. The pair of them unfrozen and fighting for their daughter’s safety would have been pretty effective, especially since Selene once against has to face down a snotty coven of vampires who don’t much like her. The movie has considerable potential with the evil plotting of Stephen Rea’s sad-eyed villain, the pending doom of two species, the moral quandary of having to fight humans (which is admittedly completely unexamined here) but as a whole the film felt rushed, and like it focused only on the less worthy aspects of its plot: fight, fight, fight. I’m going to give it 6 Fangs out of 10. It’s close to 7, but the end result is simply this: a higher score would be giving Awakening too much credit for potential without demanding that it deliver. .
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