Weekender, January 4, 2020
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SATURDAY, JANUARY 4, 2020 Mates & Dates: Today’s teenagers get more than the nuts and bolts sex talk at high school . Programmes delivered by the Police and ACC — including the Mates & Dates initiative that this image is part of — include conversations around respectful behaviour TEACHING in relationships, violence in relationships, problem- solving in complex situations, and how to stay safe. RELATIONSHIP Picture supplied SKILLS Gisborne secondary school students are learning how to treat romance with respect through programmes designed to learn from high-profile cases of violence. Sophie Rishworth explores how teenagers here are learning a better way to date. uring the Grace Millane murder especially as the whole country was hearing relationships, problem-solving in complex hey talk about whether Sophie, who was trial, a Gisborne Boys’ High School how 22-year-old Grace Millane was murdered situations, and how to stay safe. also 22, could tell, or not tell, she had been student came home and told his on a irst date in Auckland while visiting this Gisborne Boys’ High School (GBHS) and in an abusive relationship, to give today’s Dmum he was learning about country. Lytton High School (LHS) both deliver the students the red lags to look for. dating etiquette and healthy relationships at Teenagers get more than the nuts-and- Mates & Dates programme. “We’ve been doing Loves Me Not for a school. bolts sex talk at high school these days. Gisborne Girls’ High School and LHS also long time and we love it,” said GGHS head of he mother of the teenager was heartened Programmes delivered by the Police and ACC run the Loves Me Not programme, which hauora faculty Shelley Hunt. young people were being taught about include conversations around respectful tells the story of Sophie Elliott who was respect, and healthy relationships — behaviour in relationships, violence in murdered by her ex-boyfriend in 2008. CONTINUED ON PAGE 2 Chosen cremation? Cremation provides options and greater exibility for you and your family. Our cremation “packages” re ect the varying needs in our community and our “current” direct cremation prices start from $2993. Cremations are performed here in Gisborne and ashes are generally available the next day. Have the conversation then give us a call, we can discuss and document your wishes. We can also advise you on prepayment — for that nancial peace of mind. Goodbye is as important as hello. A meaningful Evan’s Funeral Services Ltd. Ph 06 867 9150 Fax 06 868 5312 farewell supports healthy grieving. 171 Ormond Road, Gisborne. Email o [email protected] 21301-02 2 THE GISBORNE HERALD LEAD ‘Extremely positive’ reaction to Sexwise programme FROM PAGE 1 unhealthy relationship. speaking to and seeking advice from funded to take the lessons. he students are taught assertive skills to professional health services,” said Mr But GBHS’s Mr Murphy said it had worked Each programme has appropriate content use in a relationship, and decision-making Hastings. well, and he intended to run it next year as based on the ages of the students it is being skills around sexuality. “We do that as a back-up — it is another well. delivered to. GGHS is also visited each year by THETA, voice saying the same thing again,” said Ms Mates & Dates carried on nicely from the Ms Hunt said the important thing was that a theatre company with an agreement with Hunt. long relationship GBHS had with Family they all carried the same message. the Ministry of Health to deliver Sexwise, a here was also a lot of work around gender Planning, and in particular Geof Meade. he message from police, teachers, the theatre production followed by a workshop. in sport. Questions raised have included, Mr Murphy said when a damning programmes and even psychologist and It is run by “why do the girls’ Education Review Oice report came out last author Nigel Latta said the same things rangatahi (youth) volleyball teams year about teaching sexuality in New Zealand about respect, about wellbeing related who are university wear such skimpy schools, it was pleasing to see GBHS ticked to sexual activity, building friendships, students. he outits?” all the right boxes. relationships, dealing with inluences, topics raised, and Ms Hunt said “hat was all down to Geof,” said Mr pressures, and the risks involved. the discussions they taught about Murphy. Police also visit the schools to reiterate the that follow, are accepting diversity, “He did a great job of using a broad-brush legal age for sex (16 or over). relevant for their and this year there approach to sexual matters. Other conversations held during the age. was also a big focus “It wasn’t just the nuts and bolts like when lessons include how do you ask someone THETA Sexwise on transgender. I was a student.” out, and how to break up in a respectful way programme In Year 11 the Topics the students discussed included . not by text or Instagram, if anyone was artistic director one-day Loves Me gender, inluences from the media, wondering. and director Not programme is relationships, attitude to pornography, how hey also cover the traditional safety tools Evan Hastings run by the police. pornography afects people’s ideas about like condoms and keeping yourself safe from said participant It used to women, and how it can be so unhealthy. A Sexually Transmitted Infections (STIs), reaction had be a Year 12 focus was put on healthy relationships, and but these were the quick lessons. he focus been extremely programme, but what made them work. was on being in a healthy relationship and positive as they feedback from the For years Mr Meade worked beside knowing if you were not in one. identiied with Year 12s suggested teachers to deliver these classes. A change in GBHS teacher Simon Murphy said there the characters and it would have been Family Planning’s policy meant Mr Meade were some “cool discussions” at the lessons. issues arising in a better it in Year could no longer deliver these. Overall, it made him feel good about the the performance. 11. Around the same time the ACC initiative job they were doing. “After the THETA artistic director and director of the Sexwise he Mates & Mates & Dates came in to the curriculum, he sex education stuf was generally easy performance, programme Evan Hastings. Picture supplied Dates programme, and was picked up by GBHS and Lytton. to teach. It was something the students were students in small funded by ACC at Mates & Dates is a healthy relationships quite interested in anyway, and humour was groups have the opportunity to interact and a cost of $18.4 million, was rolled out across programme for secondary school students, used in an atmosphere that made students interview the characters, relect on their New Zealand high schools from 2016 to taught to Year 9s in their health classes over feel safe to share their opinions, he said. behaviour, and ofer advice. his process 2020. a term, with one class a week for 10 weeks. Ms Hunt said from Year 9, GGHS students allows participants to direct the learning, It has had a mixed reaction around the he Year 10s have it delivered through their get taught about social responsibility. In making for a very engaging experience. country, mostly because of how much it cost Tu Tane programme. Year 10, the curriculum extends to what “Our post-workshop surveys show they and that it took delivery of the lessons away Mates & Dates picked up from where Mr is a healthy relationship, and what is an are left feeling far more conident about from the teachers and to the facilitators Meade left of, said Mr Murphy. Meredith Akuhata-Brown Kia ora. I was born and raised in Turanganui a Kiwa/Gisborne. I have three amazing children and am married to my childhood sweetheart Jason. I am a passionate supporter of everything community, as I believe that when we create strong communities we create a stronger, better future for our children. Being a Violence- Free Tairawhiti Champion is important to me as I know personally the destruction and impacts that family violence has on whanau. Jason Akuhata-Brown Kia Ora, ko Jason Akuhata- Brown toku ingoa. I was born and raised here in Tairawhiti and have Ngati Porou, Rongowhakaata,Te Aitanga a Mahaki, Ngati Kahungunu and Ngai Tahu whakapapa. I love this region and enjoy the lifestyle and opportunities it provides for me and my family. I believe we all have a responsibility to do our part when it comes to supporting whanau. I love championing this kaupapa as it is important for our community to keep talking about IN TAIRAWHITI WE SAY: the issues and standing up against violence in our community. Family is Everything 21435-01 SATurDAY, JANuArY 4, 2020 3 PROFILE Tsunami map man here for New Year he man behind the new tsunami inundation zone mapping report presented to Gisborne District Council last month has close family and personal ties to Gisborne. Jose Borrero has been holidaying here with his family over the festive season and he spoke to reporter Murray Robertson. r Jose Borrero is a before I met her. director and senior “So I was very interested in consultant with eCoast getting the Tairawhiti tsunami DMarine Consulting inundation project going.” and Research, the company that Jose, a keen surfer, said Gisborne worked with Niwa to compile a was one of the irst places he detailed new look at the region’s came to when he irst visited New vulnerability to tsunami. Zealand in 2003. He is a man with close family and “I’ve been back here many times personal ties to Gisborne and its since.