Study on Adult Attachment and Sexual Behavior
Total Page：16
File Type：pdf, Size：1020Kb
Personal Relationships, 9 (2002), 191–204. Printed in the United States of America. Copyright # 2002 ISSPR. 1350-4126/02 Adult attachment and sexual behavior ANTHONY F. BOGAERT AND STAN SADAVA Brock University, Canada Abstract The relations between adult attachment processes and sexuality were examined in a community sample of 792 young adults (327 men and 465 women) from the Niagara region of Canada. Participants completed questionnaires that included Simpson’s (1990) measure of adult attachment, self-reported physical attractiveness, erotophilia, and a variety of sexual behavior measures (e.g., number of sexual partners, age of first sexual experience, frequency of sexual behaviors in the past year, whether an affair had occurred in the past year, and consistent condom usage). The sexuality measures were factor analyzed to extract common factors. The results were modest, but a number of significant relationships between sexuality and attachment were observed. For example, people scoring higher on a secure attachment index perceived themselves as more physically attractive, whereas people scoring higher on an anxious attachment index perceived themselves as less physically attractive, had an early first intercourse (and more lifetime partners), more infidelity, and took more sexual precautions (e.g., condom usage). The results were generally stronger in women, with most of the attachment/sexuality associations in the full sample being driven by the results in women. Implications for understanding sexual variability, including high-risk sexual behavior, are discussed. Bowlby (1969; 1973) has posited that humans under these different types of parental care. have an innate bonding/attachment system Ainsworth et al. reported that mothers who that keeps parents/caregivers in close proxi- provide infants with consistent care and mity to their (vulnerable) infants. He believed emotional support tend to have children with that infants have certain behavioral and a secure attachment style. These children emotional reactions associated with separation have high levels of affiliative and exploratory (e.g., crying, protest) that are integral parts of behavior and consistently use their mothers this system. Although the system is proposed as a secure base to regulate distress and to be innate and universal, it is also reported anxiety. In contrast, mothers who vary in to be sensitive to certain environmental their care, sometimes being overprotective circumstances—in particular, to the types of and sometimes being inattentive, tend to have care provided by the primary caregivers. children with an anxious/ambivalent style. Using the Strange Situation Paradigm, Ains- These children tend to be less exploratory worth, Blehar, Waters, and Wall (1978) and make inconsistent and conflicted attempts researched and identified different patterns to secure support from caregivers. Finally, or styles of attachment that emerge in infants mothers who are not responsive to an infant’s needs produce children with an avoidant attachment style. These children typically do not seek support from their caregivers and We are grateful to John Cairney, Nancy DeCourville, Rosa indeed actively avoid their mothers when Ferraro-Brew, Carolyn Hafer, Don McCreary, and several anonymous reviewers who helped at various stages of this distressed. These early parental care experi- research. ences give rise to working mental models of Correspondence and requests for reprints should be the self and others, which form a basis for addressed to Anthony F. Bogaert, Community Health Sciences Department, Brock University, St. Catharines, generating expectations about relationships Canada L2S 3A1. E-mail: [email protected]. and provide a context for interpreting what 191 192 A. F. Bogaert and S. Sadava happens in those relationships (Bowlby, the context of adult attachment is sexual 1973). Thus, these early attachment experi- behavior (for a review, see Kirkpatrick, ences have a profound effect on people’s 1998). Sexual behavior is a defining feature relationships throughout their lives. Research- of most romantic/love relationships, and, thus, ers have suggested that adult relationships one might expect that adult attachment should may reflect similar attachment orientations to be relevant to this behavior. Indeed, attach- those originally observed in children (e.g., ment theorists often argue that romantic love Hazan & Shaver, 1987; Levy & Davis, 1988; involves the integration of sexuality, caregiv- Simpson & Rholes, 1998). Individuals with a ing, and attachment processes (e.g., Shaver, secure attachment style are confident and Hazan, & Bradshaw, 1988; cf. Feeney & trusting in intimacy, develop closeness with Raphael, 1992), and most modern theories of others easily, tend to feel stable and com- adult love include a sexual/passionate compo- mitted in their relationships, and rarely worry nent (e.g., Sternberg, 1986). Moreover, it has about being abandoned. Avoidant individuals been argued (e.g., Lovejoy, 1981) that the are characterized as uncomfortable with in- bond partners form in romantic/love relation- timacy and as emotionally distant and aloof; ships is partly energized by sexual attraction/ they have difficulty trusting and depending on behavior and ultimately comes from and others, and report being uncomfortable when serves sexual/reproductive ends. anyone gets too close. Anxious-ambivalent Some evolutionary theorists (e.g., Belsky, individuals are characterized as having rela- Steinberg, & Draper, 1991; Draper & Har- tionships fraught with dependency and con- pending, 1982; Kirkpatrick, 1998) have also flict; they report that others are reluctant to get linked sexuality and attachment. They have close/intimate with them, they view others as argued that attachment processes play a role in undependable and untrustworthy, and they the development of our reproductive/sexual worry that their partner does not love and/or strategies and, ultimately, our evolutionary will abandon them. history. Relative to most animals, human Adult attachment processes have been offspring typically have a prolonged and related to numerous relationship-oriented intense period of care by and attachment to behaviors, including beliefs and attitudes their parents. Stable pair-bonding (a long-term toward romantic love (Hazan & Shaver, reproductive strategy) among prospective hu- 1987), partner pairing and relationship stabi- man parents facilitates such care in children. lity over time (Kirkpatrick & Davis, 1994), However, as these researchers have also noted, relationship satisfaction and commitment individual differences in attachment processes (Collins & Read, 1990; Feeney & Noller, and resulting reproductive strategies occur in 1990; Simpson, 1990), jealousy (Sharpsteen humans. In particular, a weak attachment to & Kirkpatrick, 1997), relationship trust parents (e.g., absence of a parent) can (Mikulincer, 1998), support seeking and profoundly affect the cues and decision rules giving within couples (Simpson, Rholes, & about which reproductive strategy is most Nelligan, 1992), couple violence (Roberts & likely to be acted out in adult environments. If, Noller, 1998), nonverbal behavior in dating for example, children form relatively insecure couples (Tucker & Anders, 1998), relationship- attachments to parents (e.g., because they lack threatening situations (Simpson, Ickes, & a stable home), their adult environments are Grich, 1999), patterns of disclosure (Miku- likely to be unstable and not conducive to a lincer & Nachshon, 1991), and reactions to a long-term mating life history and they may couple’s infertility (Mikulincer, Horesh, adopt an unrestricted or short-term mating Levy-Shiff, Manovich, & Shalev, 1998). In strategy (e.g., early onset of sex, many short- general, those with a secure attachment term partners). Thus, individual differences in orientation have more successful, intimate sexual/reproductive behavior, in particular relationships. variables related to promiscuity and short-term One central aspect to romantic relationships versus long-term mating (e.g., age of first that has not been extensively studied within sexual experience; number of partners), and Attachment and sexuality 193 attachment processes may be functionally evidence that insecure undergraduates have an linked. elevated interest in casual sex. Finally, re- search indicates that, relative to those with stronger parental bonds, those who form weak Sexual behaviors relevant to attachment bonds with their parents tend to engage in a processes variety of externalizing behaviors (e.g., Grych Sexuality researchers have noted substantial & Finchman, 1990; Loeber & Dishon, 1983), variability in human sexual behavior. Some one of which is promiscuity (Robins, 1966). people have many sexual partners; others may However, there are data that qualify this have only one or perhaps no sexual partner in research on attachment processes and number their entire lifetimes. Similarly, some people of partners. Kirkpatrick and Davis (1994) participate frequently in a variety of sexual found that anxious women paired with avoid- behaviors (masturbation, oral sex, vaginal sex, ant men had relatively stable relationships, anal sex), whereas others may participate in even as stable as those of secure-secure only one type of sexual activity (e.g., vaginal pairings. Thus, stable relationships may occur sex) and perhaps only on an infrequent basis. in insecure individuals if they pair with a Interestingly, Simpson and Gangestad