The Well-Stocked Home Bar, 2nd Ed. Prepared by Adam Heinzen, June 2011 Revised by Adam Heinzen and Zach Voll, March 2013

AN INTRODUCTION TO SPIRITS : Made from distilled . The levels of quality within any specific category are generally VS, VSOP, and XO (in order of how much they have been aged, from young to old). My go-to brandy is Christian Brothers VS; E&J is another common brand. Nicer brandy is typically from France; the best-known is , named for the region it is made. The “big three” Congac brands (the most widely available, not necessarily the best) are Rémy Martin, Hennessey, and Courvoisier. There is also another French brandy from a different region called , but I’ve never had it. Brandy goes well neat (i.e., on its own with no ice, traditionally served in a large, tulip-shaped snifter), in brandy Alexanders, brandy Manhattans, brandy old-fashioneds, sidecars, as well as warm winter . Pretty good in cooking, too. I have a very boozy and delicious brandy cake recipe if you’re interested. Also check out French apple brandy () and German cherry brandy ( or kirschwasser) for interesting spins.

Gin: Made from neutral distilled grain spirit which is infused with botanicals and herbs and other shit. In most the predominant comes from juniper berries. Almost all available gins are London dry gins. Lesser-known varieties are (from Holland, where it the originated), Old Tom, and Plymouth . Gin is known as “Dutch Courage” due to its country of origin and the fact that British soldiers would drink it before going into battle. For cheap-ish gins, I am a fan of Beefeater. For more expensive ones, try Whitley Neill and Hendrick’s. In general, traditional gin should be slightly higher than the typical 80 proof; 94 proof is the pretty common to find. As far as drinks go, the saying goes that “anything you can do with , you can do better with gin”. Try gin and tonics, gimlets, the , martinis, Negronis, Singapore slings, and the . And of course, gin and juice.

Rum: Made from distilled fermented ; usually molasses or sugarcane juice. Rum made solely from the latter is referred to as rhum agricole and tastes quite different than, say, Bacardi Superior. Rum is broken up into styles: light, gold, spiced, dark, and overproof. Light rum is clear, and the aforementioned Barcardi Superior is probably the most widely available, but try some lesser-known brands, including rhum agricole. Related to light rum is cachaça (pronounced ka-CHA-sa), made in Brazil from raw sugarcane. Esquire magazine’s writer David Wondrich says that cachaça “looks like vodka and tastes like it was aged in old truck tires”. He’s right, but don’t let that deter you from making a (pronounced kie-peer-EEN-ya), the national cocktail of Brazil, which is delicious. Cachaça 51 and Boca Loca are serviceable, but Leblon and Weber Haus are even better. Gold rum 1 is whiskey-colored due to aging in . I haven’t had a lot of it, but I’ve heard good things about Angostura, Mount Gay (what a hilarious name), 10 Cane, Appleton Estate, El Dorado, and Flor de Caña, all of which probably have really good light rums, as well. Examples of spiced rum include Captain Morgan, Blackheart, and Sailor Jerry. I find these rums to be somewhat amateurish, and not good for mixing. Dark rum is very dark; a pretty commonly available one is Gosling Black Seal. Overproof rum is typically 151 proof (75.5% ABV) and is used mainly in flaming drinks; since so much of it is , it doesn’t really matter how it tastes, so stick with cheap ones like Bacardi 151 (my friends and I have come to know drinking 151 straight as “chasing the dragon” or “riding the lightning”). Classic rum drinks include daiquiris, the Cuba Libre (which is the proper name for a “rum and coke”), the , the piña colada, and the mojito. Many of these rum drinks are tropical or “tiki” drinks, which became popular in the years surrounding the Second World War. Also try rum in warm winter drinks and in baking.

Tequila: Here, I am afraid I must admit ignorance. I have spent a good deal of my nearly four-year drinking career doing everything in my power to avoid . In the interest of completeness, however, I have decided to include it here. Tequila is distilled from fermented (a genus of succulent plants similar to Aloe vera or cacti) in Mexico. IT WILL BETRAY YOU. Just like Sean Bean in every movie he’s ever been in (seriously, Goldeneye? Lord of the Rings?! National Treasure?!! Equlibrium?!?!!!). It comes in blanco (Spanish for “white”), reposado (“rested”), and añejo (“old”) varieties. My advice: except for parties and shots with the bros, avoid the pedestrian José Cuervo Especial and get a nicer reposado, ensuring that it is made from 100% blue agave - I’ve had good luck (relatively speaking) with Familia Camarena and Milagro. Or actually, my advice: don’t drink tequila. Drinks featuring tequila include margaritas, the tequila sunrise, and la (look that one up on Esquire’s website).

Vodka: Made from any type of distilled starchy (common stocks include rye, wheat, potatoes, and corn). In general, good vodka is boring and mostly tasteless, while bad vodka burns like aftershave and tastes like paint thinner. As you are aware, Smirnoff is a good, serviceable, cheap vodka. Of every vodka I have tried, I like Prairie Organic the best. It is made in Minnesota, and may not be available everywhere. Good mid-price include Stolichnaya, Russian Standard, Absolut, etc. As a historical note, vodka wasn’t widely available in the United States until the 1930s, and wasn’t popular until the 1960s. Up until then, gin was the white spirit of choice; then, some dudes who sold ginger and Smirnoff vodka, respectively, were drinking together in a bar and decided to see what happened when they combined their products. The Moscow Mule was born, and its success (together with an ad campaign claiming that vodka “leaves you breathless” - that is, leaves little scent of alcohol on the breath) ensured the rise of vodka in the United States. Other notable vodka drinks include vodka martinis, black and white Russians, bloody Marys, the (the proper name for a vodka-cranberry), the screwdriver, and the sex on the beach (only if you have a

2 vagina). We now come to whiskey/ (known as the former when from Ireland or ’Merica, and the latter when from Scotland or Canada). There are many different types, which will be covered individually below. In general, whisk(e)y is made from grain.

Bourbon and other American : Generally (although not necessarily) made in Kentucky. Most bourbon is made from at least two-thirds corn (the rest being rye, wheat, and ) and is aged for at least two years in new charred oak barrels. Common brands include Wild Turkey 101 (my personal favorite – the number stands for the proof), Maker’s Mark, Buffalo Trace, and Jim Beam. In the case of bourbon, as with gin, a proof slightly above 80 is desirable (Wild Turkey 101 is so named because it is bottled at 101 proof, or 50.5% ABV). In general, you will pay more for bourbon that has been aged longer. This doesn’t necessarily mean it is better, although it can be an indication of quality. Related spirits include , which is made in a similar fashion, but is typically filtered through maple charcoal; the only two brands I know of are Jack Daniels and the lesser-known George Dickel. is made from at least 80% corn and is usually aged for a short period of time, or not at all. It is probably the closest we can come today to “white lightning”-style moonshine. I have never had it because I think it probably tastes gross, and it is sometimes sold in mason jars, which is just sketchy-looking. is made from at least 51% rye. Rye whiskey is the historically accurate choice for many whiskey , but bourbon or is often substituted these days. However, get your hands on some Bulleit Rye or Templeton Rye, make a classic cocktail (or just pull from the bottle like a man), and you’ll soon see what all the fuss is about. Rye whiskey tends to be a little spicier than bourbon. Most manufacturers of rye whiskey also make bourbon. drinks include the , the old-fashioned, the (usually made with bourbon), the , and the whiskey .

Canadian: Canadian whisky is not too different from bourbon, but with different legal requirements surrounding its manufacture. Two well-known Canadian whiskys are Windsor Canadian and Canadian Club, the latter of which is my go-to whisk(e)y. Crown Royal is positioned a little higher in the market, and is perhaps slightly nicer than the other two. I’ve only had it once, though, so don’t take my word for it. Canadian whisky is generally used as a substitute for bourbon or rye whiskey in cocktails, so see above for a list of drinks.

Irish: Obviously, is made in Ireland. In addition to the well-known, fairly pedestrian Jameson, you should also check out lesser-known brands such as Powers and Bushmills. As far as I am aware, not too many drinks use Irish whiskey by default; try it with ginger , and Esquire also has a FANTASTIC Irish whiskey hard recipe on their website; once you get some friends, make this for a summer picnic and they will never leave you.

3 Scotch: Made in Scotland (use the adjective “Scotch” for the booze, and “Scottish” for the language, people, and culture), and generally accepted as the manliest of all drinks. I find it is an acquired taste, and I’m not 100% sure I have acquired it yet. That having been said, it’s a good thing to try. The two most commonly encountered varieties of Scotch are blended and single-. Single-malt scotch is made at one distillery by batch process from only malted barley and , while blended scotch is made of scotch mixed from different distilleries and can include other ingredients. Blended scotch thus tends to be more consistent from bottle to bottle and year to year, while single-malt has more individual character. The best-selling blended scotch is Johnnie Walker, which is available in different grades. Also check out The Famous Grouse (which, from what little experience I have, is my favorite), Cutty Sark, J&B, Dewar’s, and Chivas Regal. Single-malt scotches are grouped by region: Lowland, Speyside, Highland, the Islands, Campbeltown, and Islay. The majority of distilleries are in Speyside and the Highlands. Notable distilleries include The Glenlivet, Glenfiddich (both from Speyside), Highland Park (confusingly, from the Islands, more specifically from Orkney), Glenmorangie, Macallan (from the Highlands), Auchentoshan (from the Lowlands), and Laphroaig (from Islay). As you can see, most of the names are impossible to pronounce; check out Esquire’s Scotch pronunciation video guide online for help. There has probably been more ink spilled over single-malt scotches than any other spirit, and their taste varies wildly between, and even to some extent within, regions. The age on the bottle indicates the amount of time the “youngest” whisky spent maturing in the oak cask; generally, as with most spirits, older is more expensive. Scotch doesn’t necessarily play well with others – that is, it is difficult to mix. The two best-known cocktails using scotch are probably the and the godfather.

4 NECESSARY INGREDIENTS, WITH SOME INDICATION OF THE ORDER IN WHICH TO PURCHASE THEM

In addition to the spirits discussed above, there are a variety of ingredients (alcoholic and otherwise) essential to making cocktails. I hope to outline most of the important ones here. (for present purposes, this category also includes fortified , such as ) are typically slightly less alcoholic than spirits, and serve as flavoring agents in cocktails. Condiments are added in small amounts for flavor, color, and sweetening. Mixers are non-alcoholic ingredients used in larger amounts for dilution. Garnishes add a decorative touch. Glassware is used to further ensure “correct” cocktail presentation. Ice is a must for any cocktail. Finally, kitchen tools will help you to make the cocktails properly. In addition to the below, try to have the necessary implements to serve wine, , and beer.

Essentials Spirits: London dry gin, vodka, bourbon or Canadian whisky Liqueurs: (orange-flavored; the best is unquestionably Cointreau), (almond-flavored, from the pits of apricots; the best-known is Disaronno), sweet and dry vermouth (sort of quinine-flavored, based on ; try Noilly Prat for dry, Cinzano for sweet, and & Rossi for both) Condiments: Angostura bitters, grenadine (the most common is Rose’s, but you can try to find one made with actual pomegranate, and it would likely be better) Mixers: Lemon and lime juices (fresh-squeezed will make an unbelievable difference), club soda (if you want to get fancy, use Perrier or San Pellegrino, and smaller bottles are better for making a few drinks at a time) Garnishes: Maraschino cherries (with stems; they make a better garnish), lemon peel (you can cut them off the lemons before you juice them; try to get only the yellow part with a minimum of the white pith underneath, which can make a drink taste ) Glassware: Old-fashioned glasses, or Collins glasses (I would add cocktail/martini glasses, but I’ve gotten by without them for years so far, so they are probably not “essential”) Ice cubes (make sure they are as clear, cold, and tasteless as possible) Tools: Citrus juicer or reamer, jigger, mixing glass, long spoon, strainer, chef’s and paring knives, cutting board

Good Things to Have Around Spirits: Brandy, light rum, gold or dark rum, another kind of whisk(e)y Liqueurs: Light or dark crème de cacao (chocolate-flavored; I prefer light, but they taste pretty much the same), (use in the Americano, Negroni, and others), coffee (such as or Kahlúa), (such as Baileys) Condiments: Rose’s Lime Cordial (a sweetened lime juice; not interchangeable with lime juice), simple syrup (buy it or make it yourself by mixing equal parts by volume sugar and water until dissolved; you can actually use even more sugar if you want)

5 Mixers: Orange juice (not from concentrate – try Florida’s Natural; if have the patience to fresh-squeeze, that’s probably even better), tonic water (which differs from club soda in that it contains the bitter compound quinine), lemon-lime soda, , red cranberry juice, , cream Garnishes: Orange peel, green pimento-stuffed olives, nutmeg, fresh mint, coarse salt, superfine (not confectioner’s or powdered) sugar, sugar cubes Glassware: Cocktail/martini glasses, shot glasses Crushed ice (the best way to make this is probably to get a heavy wooden mallet and a canvas coin sack) Tools: Boston shaker, Hawthorn strainer, muddler (a blunt-ended stick to crush herbs, fruit, and sugar in the bottom of glasses), barspoon (a long spoon with a twisted handle ideal for stirring drinks in the mixing glass), channel knife (used to cut thin strips of citrus peel), zester (either get a micro-plane, which is also great for grating hard cheeses, or get a channel knife/zester combination)

Taking It To The Next Level Spirits: Cachaça, Scotch, cognac, reposado tequila, rye whiskey Liqueurs: (orange-flavored, similar to triple sec), crème de menthe (mint-flavored, comes in white and green varieties), (hazelnut), Galliano (herbal) Condiments: Orange bitters (try Regans’ #6 Orange Bitters) Mixers: Pineapple juice, grapefruit juice Garnishes: Cinnamon sticks, ground cinnamon, pineapple, strawberries, cocktail onions, interesting olives (stuffed with garlic or almonds, for example) Glassware: Brandy snifters, glasses Tools: Julep strainer, heavy-duty blender, ice bucket and tongs

Extra Credit Spirits: Calvados (French apple brandy), kirschwasser (also referred to as kirsch, a cherry brandy originating from the border between France and Germany; I’ve had one from Clear Creek Distillery out of Oregon), a variety of single-malt Scotches, Armagnac, overproof rum or Everclear (hopefully you are can get the 190-proof stuff, not the 151-proof crap they sell in Minnesota), (which is actually pretty disgusting) Liqueurs: There is really no limit here. Look into , Pernod or, Bénédictine, (which is now legal in the U.S.), (or try making your own with neutral grain spirits, sugar, water, and lemon peels), Curaçao, nocello, crème de noyaux, Chartreuse, Cherry Heering, Bols Parfait d’Amour, Maraschino, Lillet Blanc, Rouge, to name just a few Condiments: Orgeat syrup, Peychaud’s bitters, orange flower water Garnishes: Try a variety of fresh herbs and whole spices Big ice cubes (these will melt more slowly due to their lower surface area to volume ratio, and so will not dilute a drink as quickly; ideally, look for large ice ball molds)

6 RESOURCES FOR FURTHER INFORMATION

The best cocktail book I’ve ever read is The Joy of Mixology by Gary Regan. I have also heard very good things about The Fine Art of Mixing Drinks, by David Embury. Both are available on Amazon.

For a guide on choosing ingredients, look for reviews and competitions online. My favorite site is the San Francisco World Spirits Competition (www.sfspiritscomp.com), which has results archived from the past ten-plus years.

As far as recipes, the aforementioned books are good both for their quality recipes, and for their description of how to invent your own. For additional guidance, I like using Esquire’s website (www.esquire.com/drinks/) and the Internet Cocktail Database (www.cocktaildb.com/index/). The recipes on the former are of higher quality, while the latter has many, many more. The Internet Cocktail Database also has a good guide to ingredients (with pictures, in many cases) and substitutions. Esquire’s website also has a food and drink blog (http://www.esquire.com/blogs/food-for-men/) that often covers drinking. In addition, Esquire has buying guides to various types of spirits (off the top of my head, rum, tequila, and whiskey, along with a video pronunciation guide for single-malt scotches), and their resident cocktail historian David Wondrich knows his stuff.

And, of course, if you want someone who thinks he knows more than he actually does, I’m always only an email or tweet away...

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