ag All The Noose That's Fit to be Tied " THE NEWSPAPER FOR SCIENCE STUDENTS VERSION 5.02 • OCTOBER 7,1991 VOTEORDJEI Sandra Mah Year Rep positions. Overall, to SUS Council's Newest Department Reps Contested Positions Internal VP though, turnout was disap­ Members (in by acclaimation) Biochemistry: Kitty Yow 1st Year: Janice Boyle pointing. Although all depart­ Biology: Cheryl Brown Nancy Cherry Yes, look out Rita Johnston Year Reps ment (except for General 3rd Year: Jeff Chen Biopsychology: Edna Chan Lica Chui and Mike Harcourt, the Science and Oceanography) Chemistry: Steven Ro Minaz Fazal Science Undergrad Society is Patrick Lum and year rep spots were filled, Chris Sing CompSci: Zain Khandwala Ryan McCuaig holding its own elections. a few more contested positions Geography: Todd Randall Ellen Yeung There haven't been any scan­ would have made the elections 4th Year: Wendy Ma Geology: Ed Ronyecz 2nd Year: Daniel Baker dals, but the competition is more exciting! All first and Elaine Wong Geo/Astro: Ian Perry Glen David stiff! This year there are six second year Science students K.C. Wright Math: Dennis Chow Fahreen Rawji first-years running for the are encouraged to get out arid Microbiology: Grant Quan Jareu coveted two spots as First- VOTE! Pharmacology: Dean Jones Year Reps, and four second- Szolomicki Congratulations and Welcome Physics: Troy Millington years vying for three Second- Physiology: Charlene Fell INGREDIENTS PHYSSOC IN POST-COUP OVERHAUL Hennings (CP) dated power. In what Physsioc anyway. The only difference bers, such as free use of study Editorial press releases call a process of it should make is that with carrels, microwave, fridge, In the aftermath of the recent "constitutional reform", them gone, our volleyball team and phone. The regular sales attempted S.U.S. takeover, Thornton has assumed the new should stand a chance of of coffee, donuts, muffins and Drake on TRIUMF 3 dramatic changes have oc­ postion of Comptroller- winning". She then proceeded ($.75) pop will continue, curred in the leadership of General. to oudine a course of planned allthough Thornton was Physsoc, the once powerful In an interview with the 432:, action including a wine & announced that only oatmeal Between the Lines 3 club behind the unsuccessful Thornton denied that the cheese party for physics tofu muffins will be sold in the coup. With President Mark dissappearance of Hoenig a id faculty, students and physsoc future. Hoenig and Vice-president Dik Miller van Selst would have any members to be held on Friday, The new Physsoc leader Erick van Selst still in hiding affect on the day to day October 25 following the revealed that it was not only from S.U.S. security forces, running of the society. Thursday General Meeting. loyalty to S.U.S. that pre­ Sarah Thornton, former Secre­ Pseudoscience 4-5 "Those plebian #$@!%s basi­ Physsoc will continue to offer vented her from joining her tary /Treasurer has consoli­ cally did whatever I told them, its regular services to mem- former fellow executives, but also a general disinclination to Sociopath 4,6 be involved in open silliness. \aert££ AU>£ fcasy fcy DW&lfcl "Those guys were always embarassing me in public" said Candidates Thornton. "From now on, we will begin a silliness crack­ down in Physsoc." In other Sports discussions with the 432, Thornton deplored the increas­ ing incidence of advertisments Organized Grime 6 disgused as apparently real news stories. Forced Entries RUPERT IS A Mundane Dumpster 7 NAUGHTY BEAR Toronto (CP) Conspiracy Rant 7 A recent episode of the childrens' animated series, May contain trace Rupert the Bear, has been recalled after it was discovered quantities of that the background art in one strichnine. sequence contains books bearing titles like: "Matrons in Leather" and "Spanking." The Keep out of the reach chairman of the Toronto-based of small children. Nelvana, which produces Rupert, said that "appropriate action" would be taken. Page Two The Four Thirty-Two Version 5.02 • October 7,1991 Patrick REDDING This is the regular editorial involves the use of weapons. column. Out of deference to The man who developed the the readership of the 432,1 art as a student of traditional promise not to talk about my Japanese weapons schools, so penis. Or my dog's penis. In there is a considerable similar­ fact, I'll make a sincere effort ity between Aikido and older to not be too self-indulgent samurai arts. This occasion- with the paper, above and allyresults in disturbing class beyond the level expected of discussions in which Sensei an editor. I hope that these assures us that "he himself has verbal assurances are adequate, never killed anyone," while but I want you to trust and explaining that a quick thrust believe me, so I am prepared with a spear must be followed to take the editor-reader immediately by a snap with­ square inch it takes to break contract one step further and drawal, before the opponent's through wood panelling. The 432™ lay my gonads on the table, so muscles can seize up. One I stayed at that school until I to speak—oh shit, I'm really recent such lecture revolved moved up to Victoria, where I sorry, T didn't mean...jeez, I around the proper sword eventually found another dojo. 1991 The Science Undergrad Society guess 1 already screwed up. technique for killing one This one was very different. It Oh well. person in a crowd, without didn't smell like pee for one I study Aikido. That never hitting anyone else. Person­ thing, but the teachers were Version 5.02 surprises anybody these days, ally, I always take these little also different. They talked, October 7,1991 since martial arts instruction chats with a grain of salt, since sometimes even in English, for middle class white boys Sensei is a counselling psy­ and very slowly demonstrated isn't so much of a rarity chologist, and I can't really see each technique step by step. Editor anymore. Its not like I have to him employing these moves in They all seemed to have go to Japan or anything to the halls of a junior high beards and jobs for computer Patrick Redding train. Aikido is a little school. companies, or little hobby different from other arts. The dojo (school) where I farms on Saltspring Island. Layout Unlike Karate, which is the art train currently is not the first They didn't hiss very much. I Ryan McC u aig of breaking stacks of bricks, or for me. When I started out, it discovered an important fact Judo, which is the art of was at an Aikikai in San Diego about western martial artists, Patrick Redding grabbing people by the lapels with a very different Sensei, which is that they do not place and throwing them out of bars, who is named Chiba. Chiba- nearly so much stock on Writers Aikido is the art of convincing Sensei is known widely in the looking dour, and preparing to Morgan Burke people that they want to hold Aikido world for being very die before class, as their Charlie Cho on to your wrist while you intimidating. I know that Japanese counterparts. The lock their joints into unnatural when I first saw him, he was training was still fairly tradi­ Jaret Clay positions and spin them around stalking around the training tional, but it lacked that Aaron Drake in circles until they get dizzy mat with a very serious expres­ element of imminent doom Justin Fellenz and fall over. (By the way, if sion on his face. Sometimes that kept us on our toes in Clement Fung any of my Aiki-colleagues are he would sit down on a narrow Chiba-Sensei's school. reading this, please don't tell bench, cross his arms and Mark Hoenig Well, I've been at my Mike Hamilton Sensei). Unlike Karate and watch his students practice current dojo for several Judo, which require you to their techniques. He didn't months now, and find it to be a Sandra Mah perform many sets.of fingertip talk very much, although he happy compromise between Ryan McC uaig push-ups to get into shape, did hiss occasionally. When the dogmatic, bushido-driven Derek Miller Aikido doesn't demand that he would demonstrate a new approach of Chiba, and the you have any kind of real throw or pin, all of the students Patrick Redding Zen surfer ethic employed by Gio Vassone physical strength. In fact, the would be lined up in a row, the New Age Aikidoists on the student is actively encouraged trying not to slouch for fear island. My new instructor Roger Watts to cultivate a noticeable saki that he would catch them and likes to lecture us about proper gut, so that he/she looks kind shout something belligerent in etiquette, but he is very jolly. Illustrators of like The Buddha. Japanese. Then, without He particularly gets a chuckle The idea in Aikido is that if looking at anyone in particular, out of the way that I bounce Patrick Reddin g someone charges you, you just Chiba-Sensei would sort of off my head when he demon­ David Sovka sort of step to the side and trip gesture vaguely, and EX­ strates a throw on me. Except­ Roger Watts them. This amazingly esoteric ACTLY the right senior ing the times that it feels like student would scramble to his principle is sometimes called Sensei's tormenting me for Printing "redirecting your opponent's feet and, sweating, prepare to fun, I generally enjoy classes, energy." I myself have only attack the instructor.