Abstract This is an affect theory examination of the true crime and comedy podcast titled My Favorite Murder with a closer inspection of the episode “190 – Lick the Clock” which was published in the fall of 2019. This thesis uses autoethnographic vignettes, multimodal analysis, and affect theory to analyse the phenomenon of having an affect experiences by the podcast medium. First, it theorises the style of autoethnography and methodises autobiographical vignettes as reflexivity insights to affects and secondly, it theorises affects from a psychoanalytical, philosophical, and cultural approach. To begin with the theory introduces and conceptualises autoethnography by relying on post modernistic traditions that disregards the concept of objective reality and meanwhile effectuates the stylistic choices of autoethnographies Michael Humphreys and Nina Lykke. It theorises affect theory by introducing the concept from a psychoanalytical point of view by Silvan S. Tomkins. Through his work, the nature and agenda of affects is made known which is later operationalised in the cultural approach. The psychoanalytical approach transforms into concepts of escapism and philosophical debate on the need to disappear for the sake of mental balance. Lastly, and most predominantly, affects are operationalised into cultural studies by theorising the works of Sara Ahmed, Denise Riley, Melissa Gregg, Gregory J. Seigworth, Elspeth Probyn and others who have worked the affective theorisation before. Ahmed and the book The Affect Theory Reader edited by Gregg and Seigworth have made a huge impact on the cultural approach and theorisation of affects in this thesis. Furthermore, the methodology re-introduces Humphreys’ autoethnographic style by first describing Carey Jewitt and Gunther Kress’ application of the multimodal method, and then using Humphreys’ vignettes as reflexivity modes throughout the whole thesis. The autoethnographic vignettes break the format of classic academic analysis by relying on personal experience as the main motivator for understanding a cultural phenomenon. It provides a subjective observation which is essential in understanding the affect agenda. The analysis, while also relying on vignettes for insight, is written in the style and method of Lykke’s ethno-drama and describes the different modes, and how and why they have the capacity to impact an affect experience. Lykke’s method can be characterised as an argumentative analysis and discussion which is why the analysis of this thesis ends in a similar fashion of both in-depth text analysis and a wider perspective analysis of the My Favorite Murder podcast and its format. Based on the autoethnographic affect analysis, I determine why podcasting is an opportune medium for me in which to experience and achieve affect balance. Most importantly, I determine why My Favorite Murder is affect balancing for me and how it has come to be so in the last few years. This is evident both in the analysis and in the conclusion, but most importantly, it is evident in the exposé of the self through reflexivity vignettes. Aalborg Universitet Kroghstræde 3 9220 Aalborg Ø An Autoethnographic Affect Experience Podcast Listening, My Favorite Murder, and the Art of Getting Personal Supervisor: Marianne Kongerslev Maj Lykke Davidsen Master’s Thesis 2nd June 2020 Davidsen, 1 Table of Contents Abstract ................................................................................................................................................... 0 1.Thesis Statement .................................................................................................................................. 3 1.1 A Special Thanks To ..................................................................................................................... 4 2. The Introduction .................................................................................................................................. 5 2.1 Introducing the Podcast ................................................................................................................. 6 2.1.1 Hardstark’s Story: The Radium Girls .................................................................................... 7 2.1.2 Kilgariff’s story: The Murder of Lisa Cihaski ....................................................................... 8 3. The Theory ........................................................................................................................................ 10 3.1 Introducing an Autoethnographic Style ...................................................................................... 11 3.2 Introducing Affect Theory .......................................................................................................... 15 3.2.1 Vignette ................................................................................................................................ 15 3.3 Operationalising Affect in Language Studies: An Early Attempt .............................................. 16 3.4 Operationalising Affects in Cultural Studies: The Affect Theory Reader .................................. 17 3.4.1 The Regions ......................................................................................................................... 19 3.4.2 Vignette ................................................................................................................................ 26 3.4.3 Vignette ................................................................................................................................ 29 3.4.4 Vignette ................................................................................................................................ 31 4. The Methodology .............................................................................................................................. 35 4.1 A Multimodal Method ................................................................................................................ 35 4.1.2 Representational Modes ....................................................................................................... 37 4.2 The Autoethnographic Perspective ............................................................................................. 38 5. The Analysis ..................................................................................................................................... 40 5.0.1 Vignette ................................................................................................................................ 40 5.1 Representational Mode: The Presenters ...................................................................................... 41 5.1.1 Vignette ................................................................................................................................ 41 5.1.1 Perspective on Presenters: Gender ....................................................................................... 43 5.2 Representational Mode: The Format ........................................................................................... 46 5.3 Ethnographic Mode: The Listeners Job ...................................................................................... 47 AALBORG UNIVERSITY 2020 Davidsen, 2 5.3.1 Vignette ................................................................................................................................ 48 5.3.2 Vignette ................................................................................................................................ 48 5.4 Affect Mode: Autoethnographic Discussion ............................................................................... 49 5.4.1 Vignette ................................................................................................................................ 49 5.4.2 Vignette ................................................................................................................................ 50 5.4.3 Being Overpowered: Shame, Jealousy and Other Negative Affects .................................... 50 5.4.2 My Affect Experience of Episode 190 ................................................................................. 53 6. The Conclusion ................................................................................................................................. 59 Works Cited .......................................................................................................................................... 63 Including Secondary Literature ............................................................................................................. 63 AALBORG UNIVERSITY 2020 Davidsen, 3 1.Thesis Statement By means of an autoethnographic style, I investigate the phenomenon of “affect experience” through a multimodal method approach to podcast listening. Through the medium of vignettes, the autoethnographic style double acts as a reflexivity art installation. In consequence of the nature of affects, both autoethnographic theory and style, and the psychoanalytical origins of affects are theorised as well as culturally theorised and investigated throughout. AALBORG UNIVERSITY 2020 Davidsen, 4 1.1 A Special Thanks To /M, thank you so much for putting up with me amid a global pandemic. Supervising me under normal circumstance would have been (and has been) challenging enough, and yet you not only had the patience to read a million first drafts, you also had the grace to be kind about it. Thank you for