SUMMER • TURN OFF THE LIGHTS! • #WHOFARTED? INSIDE: Interview with Black-ish’s Yara Shahidi REBELLION! (Why You Shouldn’t Worry) SPONSORED BY Where is Desperate Housewives’ JAMES An Honest Look at DENTON? HOMELESSNESS Should I Call the Mean Girl’s Mom? 4Simple Rules for Social Media It’s Time VOL. ISSUE MARCHAPRIL . to Talk About PORNOGRAPHY yourteenmag.com SEE FOR YOURSELF THE WRA DIFFERENCE W estern R eserve A cademy OPEN HOUSE APRIL12 AT 1PM Our students are immersed in a tight-knit community of peers, faculty, advisors and parents, all of who are dedicated to their individual needs and success. REGISTER TO ATTEND Visit wra.net/openhouse or call the Admission Office at 330.650.9717 wra.net/openhouse Hudson, OH | Boarding•Day | Grades 9-12 Hudson, OH | Boarding•Day | Grades 9-12 CONTENTS p. 11 DEPARTMENTS: 30 Rebellion Why you shouldn’t worry 40 Crossroads Porn gives the wrong idea 35 Amy Speidel shares tips about sex for handling the heat of the (rebellious) moment. 45 Ask the Doctor An orthodontist weighs in on 38 Teen Speak: braces Hey parents, chill 49 College Corner Ideas for a well-spent summer p. 51 Tween Talk 30 Should I call the mean girl’s mom? UP FRONT: 54 Hot Topics 7 Bulletin Board 14 Move Out Skills Where is Desperate Readers share their prom Cooking Housewives' James Denton? stories 16 Tech Talk 57 Small Stuff 9 Stats 4 simple rules for Turn off the lights! Do you really want to know? social media Snapshot In the Spotlight 59 18 Le£ ers from dad 10 Product Picks Yara Shahidi from the Kid-tested and new hit show Black-ish parent-approved 60 All About Me 20 Book Review I’ll miss you. I’ll miss you not. 12 In a Minute Brave New World Texting your teen’s friends by Aldous Huxley Farting Steak Oreganata recipe 22 Perspectives from Patsy’s Italian Family An honest look at Cookbook homeslessness ON THE COVER REBELLION! Is it time to shi the way we think about this stage of our teenager's lives? Page 30. COVER PHOTO : BETH SEGAL p. 54 YOUR TEEN | MARCHAPRIL 2015 1 DO SOMETHING March-April 2015 Volume 7, Issue 4 GET MOVING Northeast Ohio’s #1 BE CONFIDENT PUBLISHER & heart care for your child. CHIEF REVENUE OFFICER RISK NEW THINGS Stephanie Silverman PUBLISHER & EDITOR¢IN¢CHIEF STICK WITH IT Susan R. Borison T H E N B E READY FOR EDITORIAL ADVISORY BOARD EDITORIAL MANAGER Elise Ellick Ellen Rome, MD, Diana Simeon Teen Counselor in the MPH BIG SURPRISES Division of Adolescent Pediatrician, Head, COPY EDITOR Medicine, Department Section of Adolescent Beth Troy of Pediatrics at Medicine at Cleveland MetroHealth. Clinic. EDITORIAL ASSISTANT Ahuva Sunshine Lauren Rich Fine Chris Seper Executive Search Founder, MedCity SALES Consultant at Howard Media and Publisher, & O’Brien Associates. Alison Bunch, Lisa Golovan, MedCityNews.com. Shari Silk Marcia Hales Amy Speidel Business Manager with Certified Parent Coach CREATIVE One Wish, LLC. at Senders Parenting CREATIVE DIRECTOR Center. Meredith Pangrace Amanda Weiss Kelly, MD Sonni Kwon PHOTOGRAPHER University Hospitals, Senkfor, MBA Beth Segal Rainbow Babies & Independent Children’s Hospital Consultant. Facilitator Pediatrician, Director, with The WIT Group and WEB CONTENT Pediatric Sports MAC Consulting. Medicine. WEB CONTENT EDITOR Mindy Gallagher Judy Stenta, MSW Julian Peskin, MD Retired Project Director, SEO ADVISOR Cleveland Clinic staff SAY, a program of Mike Murray member, Department Bellefaire JCB. of Obstetrics and Gynecology. IT SPECIALIST Steven Wexberg, MD Hunter Chisolm Staff Pediatrician, Sylvia Rimm, PhD Cleveland Clinic Psychologist, Foundation. CIRCULATION Director of Family CIRCULATION SPECIALIST Achievement Clinic, Clinical Professor, Lucene Wisniewski, Eca Taylor Case Western Reserve PhD, FAED School of Medicine. Clinical Director and co-founder of the An Ursuline education is an affordable investment THIS ISSUE Cleveland Center for Michael Rier, Eating Disorders. that pays dividends in your future. Nearby Cleveland CONTRIBUTING WRITERS CPA Rebecca Borison, Kevinee Gilmore, Retired Partner, provides over half of the student body with real-world Randye Hoder, Lexi Hubbel, Ernst & Young LLP. Lee Zapis Michelle Icard, Isabella Jaffery, President of Zapis experience. Last year, 100% of rst-year students Karen McHenry, Jane Parent, Capital Group. received aid and new alums were employed at a rate Ma Peterson, Laura Putre, Nathaniel A. Turner, Samantha Zabell three times higher than the national average. Focus- ing on holistic education, Ursuline College empowers More content online at yourteenmag.com facebook.com/YourTeen @YourTeenMag women to lead and change the world. Your Teen, Vol 7, Issue 4, March-April 2015 is a publication of Your Teen, Inc., a bi-monthly publication, $3.95. Bellefaire JCB, 22001 Fairmount Blvd., Shaker Heights, Ohio 44118. ©2015 by Your Teen, Inc. All rights reserved. No part of this magazine may be reproduced without the wrien consent of Your Teen magazine.Your Teen does not verify claims or information appearing in any advertisements contained in this magazine. While advertising copy is reviewed, no endorsement of any product or service offered by any advertisement is intended or implied by publication in Your Teen. 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Euclid, Ohio 44121 216.444.KIDS clevelandclinicchildrens.org 2 YOUR TEEN | MARCHAPRIL 2015 4959-03 CCWC_PedsCardiology_8.5x10.875-99-2.indd 1 1/19/15 11:13 AM JOB NUMBER & COMPONENT Prepared by: CREATIVE DEPARTMENT Approval Initials Date AEs Client: Cleveland Clinic DELIVERABLES: 4959-03 CCWC_PedsCardiology_8.5x10.875-99-2 Copywriter Division: Women’s & Children’s Laser 1370 W 6th St, 3rd fl oor Project: Peds Cardiology CD - Copy PUBLICATION or MEDIUM Cleveland, OH 44113 Flat Size: Comp 216.574.9100 YOUR TEEN FOR PARENTS Trim Size: 8.5” x 10.875” Designer/AD PDF Live Area: CD - Design PDF (No Slug) INSERTION DATE Bleed: 8.75” x 11.125” JPG Line Screen: 150 Quality 03.01.15 Assurance COLOR: Flash Proofreader Production Notes: 4 Color BW Native Files 2 Color Other Production IMAGE: AE Low Res Hi Res Retouched Purchased FINAL APPROVAL Approved Retouched Approved Northeast Ohio’s #1 heart care for your child. @YourTeenMag Same-day appointments 216.444.KIDS clevelandclinicchildrens.org 4959-03 CCWC_PedsCardiology_8.5x10.875-99-2.indd 1 1/19/15 11:13 AM JOB NUMBER & COMPONENT Prepared by: CREATIVE DEPARTMENT Approval Initials Date AEs Client: Cleveland Clinic DELIVERABLES: 4959-03 CCWC_PedsCardiology_8.5x10.875-99-2 Copywriter Division: Women’s & Children’s Laser 1370 W 6th St, 3rd fl oor Project: Peds Cardiology CD - Copy PUBLICATION or MEDIUM Cleveland, OH 44113 Flat Size: Comp 216.574.9100 YOUR TEEN FOR PARENTS Trim Size: 8.5” x 10.875” Designer/AD PDF Live Area: CD - Design PDF (No Slug) INSERTION DATE Bleed: 8.75” x 11.125” JPG Line Screen: 150 Quality 03.01.15 Assurance COLOR: Flash Proofreader Production Notes: 4 Color BW Native Files 2 Color Other Production IMAGE: AE Low Res Hi Res Retouched Purchased FINAL APPROVAL Approved Retouched Approved EDITOR’S LETTER walked into my kitchen and my 16-year-old daugh- After talking with Amy, I realized that I was the one who ter was on her way out. needed help. Most of what Amy suggested is in the Q&A on page 35. “Where are you going?” Honestly, I did resent that the onus was on me. I want- “I’m going to the movies.” ed permission to rant and lose control and punish. But I I listened to Amy; I tried her language. And it has really ”It’s 10 p.m. You can’t go.” worked. When I keep my cool and have an “Amy” response (which can really test my self-control), I feel much bet- “I’m going.” ter about the interaction and the outcome. I believe that Amy changed my relationship with my daughter. And I am “First of all, the question is, ‘Can I go?’ Second of all, there forever grateful. I hope that after you read her advice and is a city curfew.” Randye Hoder’s feature, you will have a similar experience. “I don’t care. I’m going.” With each response, my blood pressure rose and my heart pounded. She dug her heels in. I dug my heels in. And as she moved to leave the house, I wrestled her to the ground for the keys. I usually get a laugh with that line, and then I clarify that I actually wrestled her to the ground. I was beyond furious; I did not know how to handle the overt defiance. My children had always had what seemed like a typical amount of disagreement and conflict, but I didn’t see much rebellion. Everyone kind of followed the rules. As they got older—most noticeably, when they hit high school—I saw the power shifting, but it had been subtle. Until this happened. Congratulations to Beth Woodside, winner of the Charles Schwab $1,000 college scholarship presented at Hathaway Brown School at The College Event. I felt unhinged and needed help. I called Amy Speidel, a wise and practical parenting expert, to set up an appoint- ment. After listening to my rant about my insolent, irrever- This issue is full of wisdom: advice about Internet porn, a ent kid, she said, “Let’s talk about how you will handle this dad who saw the beauty of letter writing, tips to solving the when it happens again.” universal tension around turning the lights off. AGAIN. AGAIN. This was going to happen again? We are honored to introduce you to some wonderful peo- ple who have experienced homelessness. When you meet Amy told me that my daughter’s behavior was develop- them (on page 22), you will better understand that the mentally appropriate—she was supposed to individuate parent lottery goes a long way toward determining the and test the boundaries.