Wilfrid Laurier University Scholars Commons @ Laurier Theses and Dissertations (Comprehensive) 2018 SHAME IN THE PRESENCE OR ABSENCE OF GOD IN STEPHEN MINISTRY Richard Tamas [email protected] Follow this and additional works at: https://scholars.wlu.ca/etd Part of the Counseling Commons, and the Religion Commons Recommended Citation Tamas, Richard, "SHAME IN THE PRESENCE OR ABSENCE OF GOD IN STEPHEN MINISTRY" (2018). Theses and Dissertations (Comprehensive). 2017. https://scholars.wlu.ca/etd/2017 This Dissertation is brought to you for free and open access by Scholars Commons @ Laurier. It has been accepted for inclusion in Theses and Dissertations (Comprehensive) by an authorized administrator of Scholars Commons @ Laurier. For more information, please contact [email protected]. SHAME IN THE PRESENCE OR ABSENCE OF GOD IN STEPHEN MINISTRY by Richard Andrew Tamas Master of Divinity, University of Toronto, 2003 Bachelor of Fine Arts with Honours, Ryerson University, 2012 Bachelor of Arts, University of Toronto, 1976 DISSERTATION Submitted to the Faculty of Waterloo Lutheran Seminary in partial fulfillment of the requirements for Doctor of Philosophy in Human Relationships: Spiritual Care and Psychotherapy Wilfrid Laurier University © Richard Andrew Tamas 2018 Abstract This hermeneutical phenomenological study explores the lived experience of shame in relation to the presence or absence of God in the caregiving process of Stephen Ministry. Stephen Ministers are trained Christian caregivers who walk side-by-side with those who are struggling in a congregation. Stephen Ministers are trained by Stephen Leaders who have completed the Stephen Ministry Leadership training program. A concern for an assurance of quality of care led to the research question: what is the lived experience of unacknowledged or unprocessed shame in the presence or absence of God experienced by Stephen Ministers who offer Christian care? The foundations of the study rest in the four domains of the literature reviewed: shame and image of God, personality type, faith development, and spirituality. The results revealed an inter-relationship between the lived experience of shame, as the disintegration of one’s felt sense of self in relation to a dysregulating other, and the presence or absence of God. Future research is recommended in each domain of research that would lead to a clearer understanding of shame in the process of Christian care. Keywords: shame, image of God, spirituality, personality type, Stephen Ministry. i Acknowledgments I would like to thank the faculty of Wilfrid Laurier University and all who have helped me reach this point in my academic career. My heartfelt appreciation goes to my thesis advisor, Rev. Dr. Brice Balmer, and to the members of my dissertation committee, Rev. Dr. Mark Harris, Rev. Dr. Kristine Lund, Dr. Christopher Ross, and Dr. Carol Penner. Thank you for your support and guidance. I would also like to extend a special thank you to Rev. Dr. Lawrence A. Beech and A. Ross Gibson for their encouragement and mentorship as registered psychotherapists working with clients struggling with shame. ii TABLE OF CONTENTS List of Tables .......................................................................................................... xi List of Appendices ................................................................................................ xii Chapter 1 ............................................................................................................... 1 Stephen Ministry ............................................................................................ 2 A brief history of Stephen Ministry. ..................................................... 2 A bible-based ministry. ......................................................................... 3 The process of Stephen Ministry. ......................................................... 4 The Research Problem ................................................................................... 4 Background to the Study ............................................................................... 5 The Purpose Statement .................................................................................. 7 Research question. ................................................................................ 7 Towards an Operational Definition of Shame ............................................... 7 A relational dynamic of shame. ............................................................ 9 Definition of Shame ..................................................................................... 10 Indications of Shame ....................................................................................11 Karen Horney and shame anxiety........................................................11 Shame-rage. ........................................................................................ 12 Right-brain dysregulation. .................................................................. 12 Varieties of shame. ............................................................................. 13 A Difficult Story to Tell ............................................................................... 13 Definition of Terms ...................................................................................... 14 The experience of guilt. ...................................................................... 14 Definition of image of God. ............................................................... 15 Definition of lay caregiving. .............................................................. 16 Significance of the Study ............................................................................. 16 Scholarly research. ............................................................................. 16 Lay caregiving .................................................................................... 17 Overview of the Study ................................................................................. 17 iii Chapter Summary ........................................................................................ 18 Chapter 2. Literature Review ............................................................................ 19 Overview of Four Domains of Literature .................................................... 19 First Domain: Shame and Image of God ..................................................... 20 God representation ............................................................................. 21 God concept and God image .............................................................. 24 God image and pathology .................................................................. 25 Attachment theory. ............................................................................. 26 Second Domain: Shame and Spirituality ..................................................... 27 Spirituality and health. ....................................................................... 28 Spirituality and religion. ..................................................................... 30 Pastoral Care and Cultures of Shame .......................................................... 33 Pastoral Care and Human Brokenness ......................................................... 34 Wintry Spirituality ....................................................................................... 34 Absence and the cross. ....................................................................... 35 Third Domain: Shame and Personality Type ............................................... 36 Fourth Domain: Shame and Faith Development ......................................... 37 Fowler and shame. ............................................................................. 38 Fowler and pastoral care. ................................................................... 38 Theoretical Elements and Shame Theorists ................................................. 39 Gershen Kaufman. .............................................................................. 39 Stephen Pattison. ................................................................................ 40 John Bradshaw.................................................................................... 41 Brené Brown. ..................................................................................... 42 Patricia DeYoung. .............................................................................. 42 Summary and Research Question ................................................................ 43 Research question. .............................................................................. 44 Chapter 3. Methodology ..................................................................................... 45 The Interpretive Framework ........................................................................ 45 iv Social Constructivism .................................................................................. 46 Philosophical assumptions of social constructivism .......................... 46 Meaning-Making in Social Constructivism ................................................. 47 A Phenomenological Approach ................................................................... 48 Background of phenomenology. ........................................................ 48 Phenomenological process ................................................................. 50 Characteristics of phenomenology. ...................................................