REVEALING OUR COMMONESSENCE: A COLLABORATIVE SELF-STUDY INVOLVING CHORAL MUSIC EDUCATORS by Catherine Elizabeth Robbins A thesis submitted in conformity with the requirements for the degree of Doctor of Philosophy in Music Education Graduate Department of Music University of Toronto © Copyright by Catherine Elizabeth Robbins 2012 REVEALING OUR COMMONESSENCE: A COLLABORATIVE SELF-STUDY INVOLVING CHORAL MUSIC EDUCATORS Catherine Elizabeth Robbins Doctor of Philosophy in Music Education Graduate Department of Music University of Toronto 2012 Abstract The purpose of this qualitative study was to better understand how five choral music educators’ life experiences, prior knowledge, attitudes, values, beliefs, and understandings surrounding the formation of their musical selves have come to shape their professional practice. A secondary purpose of this research was to examine institutional context and governing ideologies of the choral music discipline. The study involved five choral music educators—including the researcher—of various ages, genders, and cultural backgrounds from Winnipeg, Manitoba. This research is grounded in what Beattie (1995) terms the dialectical and collaborative nature of narrative inquiry, but also looks to reflexive inquiry and life history methodologies (Cole & Knowles, 2000), as well as the practice of collective biography (Davies & Gannon, 2006) to shape its methodological framework. As such, autobiographical forms of self-study research are reconceptualized as collaborative self-study. Data collection methods included journal writing, personal in-depth interviews, and participant observation. In particular, regular focus group sessions, which included peer interviewing, played a central role throughout the research process. This forum allowed participants to share their musical life histories and ii interrogate each others’ narratives, thereby triggering musical memories and exposing the interconnectivity of musical pasts to current professional practice. Data is re-presented in rich narratives which trace the path of each participant’s musical life history in interaction with theory and relevant literature. Numerous themes, sub-themes, tensions, and epiphanal episodes (Denzin, 1994) are illuminated. Moreover, connections between participants’ experiences and resultant ways of knowing are exposed, and we are confronted with “the unexpectedness of universality” (Hofstadter, 2007, p. 242). Thus, our commonessence is revealed. Participant chapters are followed by a postlude featuring the researcher’s personal narratives, an examination of researcher voice, and questions regarding the practice of choral music education that have surfaced through reflexive analysis of the data. This research strives to be a model for personal professional development among choral music educators, and provides a template for future purposeful discussion in the choral discipline. iii Acknowledgments Many people have supported me throughout various stages of this journey. The most heartfelt thanks goes to my parents Charlotte and Brian and my sister Heather for unconditional love and support beyond measure. I want to express my deep gratitude to my good friend Luisa for picking me up when I needed it, and for constantly encouraging me, and being so incredibly understanding. Thank you also to my unofficial committee member Nancy Dawe for scholarly advice and wonderful friendship at every hour. I offer my appreciation to Mary Beattie for introducing me to the possibilities of autobiographical self-study research and to Ardra Cole for helping me explore, and more fully understand, the nature of qualitative research. Your early guidance has greatly shaped this thesis. Thank you to my advisor, Lee Bartel, for introducing me to new ways of thinking via music and the brain, for letting me find my path, and for always having my back. Thank you also to my committee, Lee Willingham, Ardra Cole, HilaryApfelstadt, and Lee Bartel, for insightful scholarly discussion and attention to detail. Thank you to my students for their patience, encouragement, understanding and inspiration, and for helping me to be mindful of my practice and supporting me as I continue to grow as an educator. Finally, I wish to thank the incredible participants involved in this study who so willingly gave hours of personal time with such enthusiasm and insight. Thank you to my mentor Henry for believing in me, for such firm encouragement throughout my student life and professional career, and for standing as a role model of the most honourable kind to so many choral musicians and educators. Thank you to Sonya for teaching me so much about my practice through the sharing of personal narratives, and for being so willing, open, and supportive during this process. Thank you to Derek for incredible conversation, for advice at every turn, and for tireless and outstanding efforts in support of choral music in our province. Thank you to Elroy for such fabulous friendship, personal encouragement whenever I needed it, and for continually pushing for excellence in our field. iv TABLE OF CONTENTS ABSTRACT ………………………………………………………………………………………………ii ACKNOWLEDGMENTS ……………………………………………………………………………….iv PART I PROLOGUE BUTTERFLIES IN MY STOMACH, NO VOICE FROM MY THROAT: WHO AM I AS RESEARCHER? WHO WAS I AS RESEARCHER? The Journey Begins………………………………………………………………………………..1 INTRODUCTION: TESTING THE WATERS OF REFLECTION Coming to Understand the Potential for Personal History Self-Study……………………………6 Symphonic Form: Structure and Struggle...………………………………………………………9 Exposition………………………………………………………………………………………..11 An Opening Theme……………………………………………………………………..12 Retrospection and Revelation……………………………………………………………………14 Identity and the Space Between………………………………………………………………….16 Second Theme: Modulating……………………………………………………………..16 Learning to Listening……………………………………………………………….....................19 Toward Transformation………………………………………………………………………….21 A Final Theme: Letting Go and Learning………………………………………………22 Coda as Commencement: A Tale of Transformation……………………………………………24 CHAPTER ONE: EXPLORING NEW TERRAIN Shaping a Methodology…………………………………………………………………………26 Study Purpose and Research Question………………………………………………….27 At the Crossroads: Collaborative Self-Study……………………………………………29 The Tourist Looks to a Guide: Principles of the Qualitative Research Paradigm………30 Narrative Research in Education……………………………………...………………...33 Narrative Research in Music Education………………………………..…...………..…35 Life History, Reflexive Inquiry, Collaborative Inquiry…………………………………37 Collective Biography……………………………………………………………………40 v Embracing Interaction at the Intersection: Revisioning Self-Study……………………...42 Possibility and Potential: Collaborative Self-Study……………………………………...43 CHAPTER TWO: “YOU ARE HERE •” Construct Clarification, Discussion of Related Literature, Significance…………………………46 Qualitative Research in Choral Music Education ……………………………………….48 Professional Development……………………………………………………………….50 Reflective Practice in Music Education………………………………………………….51 Personal Practical Knowledge…………………………………………………………...53 Music Educator Identity…………………………………...…………………………….54 CHAPTER THREE: EXPLORING CONCEPTUALIZATIONS OF THE SELF “Identity” to “Self”: A Quest for Common Essence.......................................................................58 Overlooking My “Self”...................................................................................................................60 A Crazy Little Thing Called Self....................................................................................................64 The Self throughout Antiquity: Changing yet Remaining “The Same”.........................................65 Descartes and the Dawning of Empiricism.....................................................................................67 The Phenomenological School of Thought.....................................................................................69 Poststructuralism: Power and Resistance, Gendered and Corporeal Selves...................................69 The Contemporary Identity Crisis...................................................................................................71 Sociology, Social Psychology, and the Interacting Self.................................................................73 The Psychological Self...................................................................................................................75 Robert Jay Lifton and the Protean Self...........................................................................................77 The Contribution of Complexity.....................................................................................................78 Neurological Ways of Knowing.....................................................................................................80 The Synaptic Self............................................................................................................................82 Revealing our Commonessence through Strange Loops and Intimate Connectedness...................85 Music Education and the Brain.......................................................................................................87 Music Education and the Synaptic Self: A Synaptic Synergy........................................................89 In Summary.....................................................................................................................................91 CHAPTER FOUR: READY FOR TAKE OFF Research Design.............................................................................................................................93