DISOWNMENT OF INDO-CANADIAN WOMEN By SWINDER KATJR JHEETA B.A., The University of British Columbia THESIS SUBMITTED IN PARTIAL FULFILLMENT OF THE REQUIREMENTS FOR THE DEGREE OF MASTER OF ARTS in THE FACULTY OF GRADUATE STUDIES (Department of Counselling Psychology) We accept this thesis as conforming to the required standard THE UNIVERSITY OF BRITISH COLUMBIA February 1988 ® Swinder Kaur Jheeta, 1988 In presenting this thesis in partial fulfilment of the requirements for an advanced degree at the University of British Columbia, I agree that the Library shall make it freely available for reference and study. I further agree that permission for extensive copying of this thesis for scholarly purposes may be granted by the head of my department or by his or her representatives. It is understood that copying or publication of this thesis for financial gain shall not be allowed without my written permission. Department of COUNSELLING PSYCHOLOGY The University of British Columbia 1956 Main Mall Vancouver, Canada V6T 1Y3 Date APRIL 25, 1988 DE-6(3/81) Abstract This study explores the psychological and social aspects of the experience of being disowned. Disownment can arise at two levels. At the intrapersonal level disownment is characterized by: the repression of emotions, needs, and aspects of one's personality. At the interpersonal level, disownment involves the complete break in social, emotional, economic, familial support and community relations. This paper examines the relationship between the two. Ten Indo-Canadian women who had experienced an aspect of disownment were interviewed. Results revealed that a variety of factors can precipitate this stressful event. How these women cope with the experience was determined by factors which either facilitated or hindered the adjustment process. From the analysis of the data, disownment not only resulted as a consequence of a life transition but it also emerged as a transitional process. The disownment model is presented to provide a framework for understanding this underlying process. The three stage model of disownment describes the: 1) anticipation of shift, 2) adjustment and 3) re-integration. Implications of the model for counseling and research are also discussed. iii For Jiwan Singh Satwachan Kaur Kuldip Satpal Sarbj it and Iqbal iv TABLE OF CONTENTS Abstract ii Dedication iii Table of Contents iv Acknowledgements vii CHAPTER I - INTRODUCTION Disownment 3 1. Definitional Considerations 3 2. Characteristics 8 Statement of the Problem 9 Indo-Canadian Women 10 Objectives of the Study 12 Definition of Terms 13 Overview 13 CHAPTER II - REVIEW OF THE LITERATURE Theoretical Considerations 15 1. Value Conflict 16 2. Identification 16 3. Group Versus Individual Needs 19 4. Self-Esteem and Identity 20 5. Cultural Conflict 21 6. Threats to Identity 23 7. Threat to the Individual 25 8. Threat to the Family 26 9. Threat to the Community 27 Examples From Other Cultures 28 1. Shunning 28 2. Bann 2 9 3. Loss of Face 30 4. Sitting Shiva 31 Cultural Context 33 1. Bi-Cultural Context 33 2. Indo-Canadian Cultural Context 36 a. The Family 36 b. Extended Family 37 c. Family Obligations 37 d. Respect, Status, and Power 38 e. Significant Relationships 40 f. Authority and Decision Making 41 g. Status of Women 41 h. Dowry 42 i. Education 43 j. Courtship 43 k. Marriage 44 1. The Marital Relationship 45 m. Divorce 46 n. Family Conflict and Problem Solving 47 o. Expulsion and Disownment 48 3. Conclusion 50 CHAPTER III - METHODOLOGY Research Design 51 1. Interview Format 51 2. Strengths and Weaknesses 53 3. Validity 54 4. Reliability 55 5. Pilot Study 55 6. Questions 56 7. Interview Schedule 57 Subjects 57 The Interview 60 1. Setting 60 2. Rapport Building 60 Data Collection and Analysis 61 Ethical Considerations 63 CHAPTER IV - RESULTS Events Precipitating Disownment 64 Contextual Background 66 1. Role of the Nuclear Family 66 2. Role of the Family of Origin 68 3. Role of the Extended Family 70 4. Role of the Community 72 vi Effects On The Individual 73 Factors Which Facilitate and Hinder Adjustment 75 1. Control and Decision-Making 75 2. Physical Proximity 76 3. Degree of Familial Loss 77 4. Degree of Individual Loss 79 5. Access to a Community 80 6. Cultural Expectations 81 7. Personality Differences 82 Coping Strategies 82 Re-integration Into the Family 84 Significance of Disownment 85 Summary of Results 86 CHAPTER V - SUMMARY AND DISCUSSION Disownment as a Transitional Process 88 1. Stage One: Shock and Immobilization 90 2. Stage Two: Denial 91 3. Stage Three: Depression 92 4. Stage Four: Letting Go 93 5. Stage Five: Testing Options 94 6. Stage Six: Search for Meaning 94 7. Stage Seven: Integration 95 Three Stage Model of Disownment 98 1. Stage One: Anticipation of Shift 98 2. Stage Two: Adjustment 99 3. Stage Three: Re-integration 100 Implications for Counselling 100 Limitations of The Study 102 Suggestions for Future Research 103 Concluding Remarks 104 REFERENCES 107 APPENDIX A: Interview Schedule 114 APPENDIX B: Agency Request Form 117 APPENDIX C: Participant Request Form 120 APPENDIX D: Contributing Factors 122 ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS I would like to express my gratitude to Dr. Bill Borgen, Dr. Frank Echols, Dr. Marv Westwood and Diane Pollard for their support, guidance and encouragement. I thank my family who supported me at all stages o this endeavour. To the women who participated in this study, I am very grateful. Finally I wish to extend my appreciation to my friends and colleagues who provided counsel and creative criticism. 1 Chapter I Introduction Shifts in trends from a "national to a world economy" and the creation of a "global village" identifies the need for cross-cultural communication, understanding and sensitivity to different world views (Naisbett, 1982; Toffler, 1983). With the increase of the world population in transit, more individuals find themselves in contact with people who share different cultural world views. This global movement is reflected on a much smaller scale within the Canadian context (Ramcharan, 1982; Srivastava, 1974; Samuda, Berry and Laferriere, 1984 ) ) . Immigrant groups arrive in Canada under varying circumstances. Some arrive to escape racial, religious intolerance and persecution, while others come for financial reasons in pursuit of a better quality of life. What these immigrants share in common is the "promise and expectation of developing, preserving and administrating their cultural identity" (Akoodie, 1984, p. 253). For some of these immigrants, movement between societies and cultural contexts which differ in roles and values, can produce immense psychological and interpersonal conflict (Akoodie, 1984; Ballard, 1978; 2 Gosh, 1984; Sue, 1980). Opposing cultural codes, rules of behavior, role confusion, loss of identity and value conflict become problematic issues which may impede the process of psychological adjustment in the new culture (Levine, 1982). Transitions which result as a consequence of immigration, represent a challenge for the individual who must deal with societal pressures and confront interpersonal conflicts that accompany such changes (Adler, 1975; Levy-Warren, 1987; Ramcharan, 1976; Sue, 1982). For the immigrant the transition is an "inevitable period of inner turmoil and intense self-consciousness" (Park, 1928, p. 893). Within the context of this larger cross-cultural passage, the individual is faced with other life transitions such as leaving home, marriage, separation, and divorce (Schlossberg, Troll, & Leibowitz, 1978). These life stage shifts, involve changes in relationship roles which can produce psychological distress. Within the cross-cultural context where values, beliefs, and lifestyles clash, such shifts can sometimes produce dramatic consequences. Since social roles provide "templates" for self- conception, social identities become very important (Breakwell, 1983). It is the reactions and expectations of those who are important to the 3 individual that help to establish social identity (Mead, 1934). These significant others act as "mirrors" in which a person sees him or herself and comes to forms his or her social identity (Sullivan, 1953; Mead, 1934; Cooley, 1902). Within the cross- cultural context where values, beliefs and roles conflict and demand contrasting responses, the individual's "social role may demand one course of action and his or her feelings for another" (Breakwell, 1983, p. 10). When the individual can no longer maintain the middle position he or she must act to eliminate the psychological distress. But when the individual moves in favor of fulfilling emotional needs he or she may face the risk of losing his or her social role, social identity and self- esteem. This typically occurs in the process of being disowned. Disownment Definitional Considerations Although the term disownment is not frequently cited in the literature, its selection for the purpose of this study arises out of popular usage among the people affected. Disownment is defined as the "act of disowning or the state of being disowned" 4 (Websters', 1974, p. 653). Disowning consists of two elements: "1) the refusal to acknowledge as belonging to oneself and 2) being dismissed or expelled from society of friends" (Websters', 1976, p. 652). Disownment is the ultimate threat to one's need to belong and is far more complex than just the dismissal of friendships. The psychological, as well as the social aspects of the experience, warrant greater attention. According to Branden (1971), an individual can disown aspects of himself or herself in several ways: 1) by repressing thoughts and memories that are regarded as immoral or humiliating; 2) by repressing emotions that conflict with his or her "notion of strength, maturity, sophistication" and sense of control; or by 3) repressing desires and "certain aspects of personality which seem incompatible with the standards of his or her significant others" (p. 88). Branden (1971) states that the individual disowns himself or herself in the name of protecting self- esteem. The underlying motive is avoidance of some aspect of reality, particularly thoughts that provoke feelings of rage, pain, frustration and fear.