Virginia Law Weekly Friday, December 5, 2003Student Life 3 Letter to the Editor: Terrorism — Why Turkey? Faculty Quotes To the Editor: was simply a proxy. Nothing could pean Union membership. In short, this new type of terrorism. As far as J. Harrison: “What the court Over the past few weeks, we be further away from the truth. Turkey is the model of modernity Turkish secularism and democracy does here is open door number have had the opportunity to talk to Upon reflection, Turks and in- for 1.3 billion Muslims worldwide. are concerned, fear not. The Turk- three, and it’s saying, ‘behind door members of the Law School com- formed observers know the answer It is a model that proves there is no ish people have enjoyed both for too number three is a goat, so you go munity about the recent terrorist to the question “Why Turkey?”: The inherent conflict between Islam and long to let them go. But we need to jail.’ They are telling people attacks in Istanbul. All of our attacks target the functioning of a a Western-style democracy. It is help. Similar to September 11, the that the goat was always there, friends and family members are Western-style democracy in a pre- this model that the Bin Ladins of threat comes from a vast and highly and now they’re just opening the safe and well. Many thanks to ev- dominantly Muslim country. These the world want to see fail. organized global network of terror- door and showing it to us.” eryone who expressed their con- terrorists believe that by inflicting Turkey is where the East and ists. It has been established that cerns and sympathies — your sup- fear into the population, they can the West meet geographically and the people who carried out the at- A. Coughlin: “She gets on the port is very much appreciated. The destabilize and eventually over- culturally, where both live in har- tacks received their training in ter- stand and says she said no, and reactions we encountered centered throw the democratic system. The mony. So is Istanbul. “What did rorist camps around the Middle East he gets on the stand and says around a single question: “Why Turkish model stands against ev- they do to my beautiful city?” cried and Afghanistan and funding from they’re passionate murmuring Turkey?” It is the same question erything that the terrorists believe one too many people captured by international terrorist groups. nos.” Turks have asked as well. We have in. While its population is predomi- TV cameras. Istanbul is a symbolic Turkey needs cooperation from Student: “How does that had our fair share of terrorism over nantly Muslim, Turkey has been a target for terrorists. It is a city all countries of the free world, espe- sound?” the decades, but the manner in republic since 1923 and constitu- where centuries-old mosques, cially the European Union. The A. Coughlin: “Everyone which these attacks were carried tionally secular since 1928; it gave churches, and synagogues stand E.U., just weeks before the attacks, watches pornography — I heard out is entirely new to the Turkish its women the right to vote in 1930 side by side against a backdrop of refused to place the terrorist group it on Fox News — so I’m not going people, reminiscent of September and is the most liberal democracy 60-story skyscrapers. It is a city that claimed responsibility for the to go there.” 11. The first of the twin attacks in in the Muslim world. Turkey also where you can roll out of a club in bombings on their terrorist list due Istanbul was on two synagogues infuriates the likes of Bin Ladin your tank top as the call to morning “human rights” concerns, whereas J. Harrison: “Baseball play- on November 15. The second set because it has strong economic, prayer is heard from the minarets the same list names several non- ers make a lot of money each year. came on November 20, targeting political, and military ties with Is- of the neighboring mosque. It is the violent organizations in Europe. If Manny Ramirez — this guy makes the British Consulate and the Turk- rael. Furthermore, unlike its Eu- diversity, modernity, and the free- we want democracy and human $20 million a year. He is a tre- ish headquarters of the London- ropean allies, there is no history of dom of our beautiful city and coun- rights in the Middle East and the mendous offensive player. But he based HSBC bank, in all killing anti-Semitism in Turkey, where try that terrorists want to destroy. Muslim world, as well as security is an example of one of those $500 over 50 people and wounding hun- hundreds of thousands of Jews flee- Will they succeed? Absolutely around the globe, the civilized world million airports with a $50 con- dreds. Looking at the immediate ing the Spanish Inquisition found not. Turkey and Istanbul remain needs to help Turkey’s efforts to trol tower.” targets, some commentators have refuge in 1492 and a second wave very safe for their inhabitants and become a model for those countries. suggested that the attacks were of immigrants was welcomed dur- visitors. The already-robust Turk- Eda Cerrahoglu ’05 A. Coughlin: “Defense attor- directed at Jews (and in turn Is- ing World War II. Turkey is also a ish security apparatus will quickly Suzan Sandikcioglu ’05 neys in white-collar cases are go- rael) and the U.K. and that Turkey member of NATO and seeks Euro- adapt itself to effectively deal with Kerem Turunc ’05 ing to go out and try to find wit- nesses and immediately get them to sign an affidavit. You want to “Santa Goes Sadistic” and Other Holiday Tales nail the story down so that when the government gets to them, you Christmas is a time when you throwing their firstborn child (me) beat them off with plastic Star Wars metal for the betterment of human- have their story first. When I did find out just how sadistic your par- to the wolves (my little cousins) and sabers. kind. this work, I was pregant with my ents are. Take, for example, Christ- seeing how I survive. “Oh, it’s just a These cousins are cute, and I Me? I get cranky standing in long daughter. The witnesses would mas sweaters. Mom always bought few hours,” Mom said. have all 83 wallet shots to prove it. lines. come in and go, ‘ohhh...the poor me one. I was that kid wearing the Just a few hours. So were those My parents actually think I’m get- I’m more like the Grinch. Yes, he pregnant woman.’ Those people sweater with teddy bears, the one BarBri videos. (Exam Question #1: ting off easy with the Santa job. I could be nasty. Bagging all the gifts would just sign anything.” that jingled because giant bells were Can Student A sue for lost sensa- never, ever help with Christmas like that. (Imagine if the Law School attached. You remember that kid. tion in both legs?) dinner. Dad taught me how to cook, woke up on Christmas morn’ and all J. Jeffries: “Let me tell you You pegged me with the dodgeball. But here’s the thing: I have which means I mac-and-cheese it the pink polo shirts were gone? what RICO basically says: ‘You But this Christmas, my parents enough cousins to fill a Toys-R-Us. like a bachelor. (I can also make That’s what I thought.) are guilty, and you are going to have something else in mind. In the They run around singing Rudolph Ramen using my car’s cigarette But you gotta feel for the Grinch. jail FOREVER.’” songs and leave MicroMachines in lighter. If I am ever trapped in the Isolated up in that cave. Forced to my toilet. When they see me at the middle of a freezing blizzard or L.A. listen to all the Who villagers sing G. Lilly: “So the witness re- Irene Noguchi, a airport they scream and suck onto traffic, I will survive, thanks to my and eat giant hams and not invite sponds that he had never seen first-year law my legs like 70-pound leeches. And Dad.) him. And the green shag rug he cocaine except on TV commer- student, is a Law now I hold the sanctity of their But deep down, I’m worried. wore? Christmas sweater. cials.... I guess he’s been watch- Weekly columnist. childhoods in my hands. If I mess To be a real Santa, you need a But the Grinch turned out to be ing some channels I haven’t found up, I will be stoned by Tonka trucks. heart of gold. You’ve got to be like a good guy. Deep down, I think Dr. yet.” holiday spirit — and since natural Don’t get me wrong. I love kids. I my friend, Eric*. Eric, who is so Seuss and Universal Studios were selection didn’t knock me off on the used to work at Disneyland, which modest I had to give him a pseud- saying it’s more about the holiday J. O’Connell: “I was told once playground — they want me to help has the highest kid density per onym, donated his car to a charity spirit than anything else. It’s about that the way to clear out an audi- with the most time-honored tradi- square foot in the world, aside from for sick children. Eric’s car also the tinsel and corny music and ence and have them running for tion of all: They want me to be that other Neverland (the Ranch).