I Need a Christmas Vacation (Gabriel and Beatriz push brooms through the aisles, roll the trash cans from the front to the back of the MPR, dust off some seats while the last of the audience is being seated.) Gabriel: (to the audience) Well, well, well, and Ho! Ho! Ho! Just thirty minutes until Christmas vacation officially begins. Beatriz: Can’t you just feel the excitement? Gabriel: (Points to the audience) Excuse me, sir, could you please take your seat. We’ve got a show to do. Beatriz: No kidding, Gabriel. The students and teachers are all planning how they will spend their holidays. Gabriel: Riding sleds in the snow. Beatriz: Ice skating. Gabriel: Roller skating at the new rink in Murrieta! Beatriz: Shopping… Gabriel: Visiting relatives… Beatriz: Making Christmas cookies… Gabriel: Waiting up for Santa Claus. (Phone rings.) Madeline: (Enters holding a cell phone to her ear.) Gloria? Can you hear me now? I’m not supposed to use my cell phone at school, but there’s only thirty minutes left until vacation starts, and I am so excited I can hardly stand it! Uh-oh, somebody’s coming. I’ll meet you at the mall right after school. Don’t have any fun until I get there. (Exits.) Beatriz: And we will be here, waxing the floors in peace and quite. Gabriel: Not me. I have a very special job to do. Beatriz: What’s that, Gabriel? Gabriel: I get to play Santa Claus at the Christmas party for the preschool children. Beatriz (Laughing): You? Playing Santa Claus? You are too skinny for Santa Claus! Gabriel: Too skinny? What are you talking about – too skinny? (School bell rings.) Beatriz: Quiet, you two. Here come the students. 1 (House lights dim and stage lights come on as the curtain opens and the children all enter and music begins. The custodians sit on their buckets and watch.) Song: I Need a Christmas Vacation Christmas is almost here. Time to spread some holiday cheer. Haven’t had a holiday for almost a year. I need a vacation now. Decorations are all about, School is great, but I’m all burned out! One more day makes me wanna shout. I need a vacation now! I need a Christmas vacation, I need a holiday, I need a Christmas vacation. Gotta go outside and play! All day! I need a Christmas vacation. Please hear me when I say, I need a Christmas vacation! Come on, Santa, take me away. Gavin: Thirty more minutes until Christmas vacation officially begins! Zachary: Thirty more minutes? I don’t think I can make it! Gavin: Hang in there, Zach. I won’t leave you behind. Zachary: Really? You’d stay behind here at school if I had to? Gavin: Just kidding. I’m outa here. Song continues: Time to ride on an open sleigh. Going skiing ev’ry single day. It’s a homework free holiday! I need a vacation now! My family goes to Mexico. Grandma will be coming from Idaho. I’ll eat with kinfolk I don’t even know. I need a vacation now! I need a Christmas vacation, I need a holiday. I need a Christmas vacation, 2 Gotta go outside and play! All day! I need a Christmas vacation, Plese hear me when I say, I need a Christmas vacation, Come on, Santa, take me away. Madeline: (On the phone) What’s that you say, Gloria? A close-out sale at Walmart? I’ll be there in a couple of hours. You’re breaking up Gloria! You’re breaking up! Holy cow. Snow is starting to fall. Song continues: Tonight we do our Christmas play, Politically correct in ev’ry way, But we gotta be done by Christmas Day. I need a vacation now. I’ll decorate the tree. I’ll donate to a cause, Go shopping at the mall. I’ll wait for Santa Claus. I need a Christmas vacation now! Right now! (Curtains close.) Gabriel (to the audience): Well, everybody is ready for a break around here – the teachers, the principal, the students, and the custodians. Beatriz: Yeah, don’t forget about us. Gabriel: Right you are! Ho! Ho! Ho! (imitating Santa) How’s that? Beatriz: Too skinny! Gabriel: Oh my, you won’t believe this, but it is snowing outside. Beatriz: Snowing here in Murrieta? Gabriel: We will have a white Christmas after all. Beatriz: Hey, look! Here comes Mrs. Hernandez’s advanced drama class from McElhinney with their Shakepearean costumes! Beatriz: They are always rehearsing! (The Drama Class enters in Shakespearean costumes. They overact to the point of ridiculous while the custodians sit on their buckets and watch.) Gavin: But soft! What light through yonder window breaks? It is the east, and Juliet is the sun! 3 Brooke: O Romeo, Romeo! Wherefore art thou, Romeo? Meghan: (frustrated) Hey, you two! We’re not doing Romeo and Juliet! We’re supposed to be rehearsing the Christmas Play. Tori: Friends! Romans! Countrymen! Meghan: No! No! Bo! Not Julius Caser! Think Christmas Pageant! Tori: Lend me your (pauses, thinks, then speaks proudly) … fruitcake! Isabella: There’s no place like hom! There’s no place like home! Meghan: I said “Christmas!” Isabella: (thinks and then proudly speaks.) There’s no place like home… for the holidays! Meghan: Argh!!! That’s it! Either we rehearse the Christmas Pageant right now or I quit! Parker: Et tu, Brutus? Meghan: Good grief! (Faces the audience and speaks) Ladies and gentlemen, as the final official school act before Christmas vacation officially begins, the Advanced Dramatic Acting Class proudly presents (pause) “A Winter’s Tale.” Song: A Winter’s Tale What do we all liveth for in the winter when it’s forty below? On mid-winter break, we ache for flakes, and flakes and flakes of snow. Mia: The Snow Falleth Parker: Et tu Brutus? Lisa: Romeo! Oh Romeo? Meghan: Oh brother! Nonny nonny, Nonny nonny, Snow, hey, nonny nonny no. Nonny nonny, Nonny nonny, ho. How we love snow. Oh what a day Nonny nonny no. How we love snow. Oh, what a sight! Wonderful world, all dressed in white. How I love staying out, love playing out in the snow. Look here it comes, just watch it fall. 4 We’ll have a white Christmas after all. How I love going out. Oh, it’s blowing out in the snow. We can ride a toboggan and ski down a hill. Go on a sleigh ride Oh boy! What a thrill! Glide and slide on figure skates, hurry, don’t be late. Nonny nonny, nonny, nonny no Snow, hey, ho. How we love snow. Nonny nonny, nonny, nonny no Hey, ho, how we love snow. Oh how I love each little flake. Snow is the icing on the cake. How we’ll be heading out, fun sledding out in the snow. Mrs. Mutchnick: Attention, students, parents, and teachers. Due to the blizzard-like conditions outside, Mr. Shaw and I have decided in the interest of safety, that we must all stay at school until this storm has passed. It could be an hour. It could be a day. It could be for the entire winter vacation! Nonny nonny, nonny, nonny nonny nonny no Snow. Hey, ho, How we love snow. Nonny nonny, nonny, nonny nonny nonny no Snow. Hey, ho, How we love snow. Mrs. Mutchnick: Have a nice day! No! How can this be? Oh no, it’s not! All of this snow isn’t so hot! What lousy luck! Look how we’re stuck in all this now! Please make it quit. Please make it stop. These aren’t just flakes, it’s a bumper crop! Please go away. Don’t make us stay. Look at all this snow! All of my plans have been put on hold. Who can go out when it’s this freezing cold? Snow can ruin ev’rything. Let’s just jump into spring! Tori: Stuck at school? This can’t be! I have an audition for Midsummer Night’s Dream. (Pauses) What’s a little snow. Romeo can shovel! Gavin: (shocked) What? Brooke: Put some boots on and get out there! Gavin: I’m an actor!! 5 Tori: You’re a 6 th grader! Nonny nonny, nonny, nonny nonny nonny no Snow. Oh no, there’s too much snow. Nonny nonny, nonny, nonny nonny nonny no Snow. Oh no, there’s too much snow. This is our tale, some tragedy. That old King Lear’s got nothing on me. One fatal flaw, I’ll never thaw ‘cause I’m stuck in snow! Snow. Oh no, please, I have to go. Snow. Oh no, there’s too much snow, snow, snow. (Curtain closes.) Gabriel: Well, what can you do? Beatriz: When life gives you snow, make snowmen! Gabriel: Or at least make the best of it. (Cell phone rings. Madeline enters, still talking on the phone.) Madeline: Yes, Gloria, I’m still at school. And it’s getting crazy around here. !!! Argh! I’m missing it!Fifty percent off at Macy’s? (She exits.) Sierra: Hey Bianca, why the long face? Toby: Don’t worry. We’ll get out of here eventually. Bianca: Eventually, sure. But my family has tickets to go to Cabo San Lucas for the holidays. Johanna: You mean as in Mexico? Bianca: Si. Sierra: You mean as in beaches? Sierra: And piñatas? Gavin: Bull fights? Zachary: And mariachis? Bianca: Yes. And now I’m stuck here at school without a chance of getting a tan. (The students gather in a huddle for a moment, then break.) Isabella: Oh, Senorita Bianca? 6 Johanna: Feliz navidad! Song: Christmas Fiesta In Old Mexico each holiday, you’ll hear a familiar ring The people dance, Mariachi play, and this is what they sing.