اَل َجنَّ ۃ تَ ْح َت اَ ْق َدا م اﻻ َّم َھا ت Paradise Under Your Feet Mother’s Handbook Paradise Under Your Feet First published in USA in September 2016 By: Lajna Ima’illah, USA (ISBN: 978-1-882494-06-4) Publisher: Lajna Ima’illah, USA 15000 Good Hope Rd Silver Spring, MD 20905-4120 Revised Edition Published in UK 2019 By: Lajna Section Markazia 22 Deer Park Road, SW19 3TL London Printed in the UK at: Raqeem Press, Farnham © Islam International Publications Ltd. No part of this book may be reproduced or used in any form or by any means graphic, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, copying or information storage and retrieval systems without permission of the publisher. ISBN: 978-1-84880-324-4 Paradise Under Your Feet Page intentionally left blank Page intentionally left blank Copyright © 2016, Lajna Ima’illah, USA All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without permission in writing from the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews. All inquiries and requests for information should be sent to [email protected]. The Lajna Ima’illah (Assembly of the Maidservants of God) is an international Muslim women’s organization, established by Hazrat Khalifatul Masih II (ra), the second successor to the Promised Messiah (as), as a vital branch of the Ahmadiyya Muslim Community. The Lajna Ima’illah’s objectives are to serve the spiritual and intellectual development of Ahmadi Muslim women, to enable them to raise their children in the practice of Islam and to serve humanity through beneficial programs. Cover: Maiza Rahman, Wajeeh Bajwa, A. Bushra Salam Bajwa Formatting: Maiza Rahman, Wajeeh Bajwa Woman and child image for the cover: Webweavers Free Clipart at: www.webweavers.nu Prepared for print by National Isha’at Secretary, Farzana Safiullah, Lajna Ima’illah USA September 2016 Paradise Under Your Feet Page intentionally left blank CONTENTS FOREWORD ...................................................................................i 9 ABBREVIATIONS ..........................................................................iii 11 GLOSSARY ...................................................................................v 13 A SUPPLICATION TO ALLAH ALMIGHTY FROM AHMADI MUSLIM MOTHERS ..................................................................................... 15vii CHAPTER 1..................................................................................... 1 THE ROLE OF AHMADI MUSLIM MOTHERS IN TARBIYAT OF CHILDREN .........................................................................................1 CHAPTER 2................................................................................... 25 PRE-BIRTH AND INFANCY ............................................................ 25 CHAPTER 3................................................................................... 39 TODDLER AND PRESCHOOL YEARS ........................................... 39 CHAPTER 4................................................................................... 59 ELEMENTARY SCHOOL YEARS .................................................... 59 CHAPTER 5................................................................................... 79 MIDDLE SCHOOL YEARS .............................................................. 79 CHAPTER 6................................................................................... 99 HIGH SCHOOL YEARS .................................................................. 99 CHAPTER 7................................................................................. 117 COLLEGE YEARS AND BEYOND ............................................... 117 RESOURCES AND REFERENCES .................................................. 137 APPENDIX 1 ............................................................................... 141 ESTABLISHING SALAT THROUGH THE AGES ............................. 141 Paradise Under Your Feet APPENDIX 2 ............................................................................... 149 WAQF-E-NAU .............................................................................. 149 APPENDIX 3 ............................................................................... 163 INTERNET SAFETY ......................................................................... 163 APPENDIX 4 ............................................................................... 169 HYGIENE, PUBERTY, AND SEX EDUCATION ............................. 169 APPENDIX 5 ............................................................................... 181 TALKING ABOUT HOMOSEXUALITY .......................................... 181 FOREWORD In our Majlis-e-Shura of 2011, Lajna Ima’illah USA deliberated on the Majlis-e-Shura proposal: Raising our Children to Love Allah. As Ahmadi Muslim mothers we have the enormous responsibility of raising our children to understand, practice and love the beautiful teachings presented to us by Allah through His Holy Qur’an and our beloved Holy Prophet Muhammad (saw). The reality we face is that our children are attracted to the strong influences of society all around them, which pull them away from the good teachings of Islam and many of them sadly lose their connection with Islam and the Jama’at. It was decided then that A Mother’s Handbook, serving as a reference guide and a support for mothers on raising Ahmadi children from birth to college age, should be compiled. Ahmadi mothers have the immense task of not only raising good citizens, but raising children who love Allah, who turn to Him in Prayer and who strive their utmost to read, understand and live by the Holy Qur’an; children who have that distinction of knowing the Promised Messiah (as) has come, who listen to and love the Khalifa of the time and identify themselves with Jama’at Ahmadiyya. There are many excellent books on parenting in the secular world, whereas the purpose of this book is to serve as a companion to help and remind mothers about the Tarbiyat (moral training) of their children and of setting the best example for their children’s spiritual journey. Whether you are a mother already or a mother to be, Insha’Allah, I am sure you will find this book to be most resourceful. It is a compilation of wisdom and guidance from our Khulafa combined with valuable years of experience from the women who wrote it. i Paradise Under Your Feet My heartfelt thanks goes to all those involved in its publication, especially National Secretary Tarbiyat, Aziza Rahman, for writing and compiling this much needed book together with her team: Sadaf Ijaz, Sadiqa Mian, Saadia Ahmed, Shahina Bashir, Ayesha Ahmad and Mubarka Sadiq and in addition, Ruqaiya Asad for the appendix on hygiene, Mariam Rahman and Bushra Salam Bajwa for proofreading. Thanks also to the Lajna Isha’at department for preparing the book for print and to Dr. Wajeeh Bajwa for his assistance in formatting and printing the book. May Allah bless this book and may He fill the readers’ hearts with the inspiration to color their surroundings with the love of God for the benefit of their children and the courage to be those mothers at whose feet Paradise may be found, Ameen. Saliha Malik Sadr Lajna Ima’illah USA September 2016 ii ABBREVIATIONS The following abbreviations have been used in parentheses. Readers are urged to recite the full salutations: saw sal-lallahu ‘alaihi wa sallam, meaning ‘may the peace and blessings of Allah be upon him’ is written after the name of the Holy Prophet Muhammad (saw). as alaihis salam, meaning ‘may peace be upon him’ is written after the names of Prophets other than the Holy Prophet Muhammad (saw). ra radi-Allahu ‘anhu/’anha/’anhum, meaning ‘may Allah be pleased with him/her/them’ is written after the names of the Companions of the Holy Prophet Muhammad (saw) or of the Promised Messiah (as). rh Rahimahullahu Ta’ala meaning ‘may Allah shower His Mercy upon him’ is written after the names of deceased pious Muslims who are not Companions of the Holy Prophet Muhammad (saw) or of the Promised Messiah (as). aba ayyadahullahu ta’ala bi nasrihil ‘aziz, meaning ‘may Allah support him with His Mighty Help’ is written after the name of the current Khalifa of the Promised Messiah (as). iii Paradise Under Your Feet Page intentionally left blank iv GLOSSARY Adhan Call to prayer Aqiqah Sacrifice of animal to celebrate birth of child Chanda Financial dues Chandajaat Donations Darsul-Hadith Study of Hadith Darsul-Qur’an Study of Holy Qur’an Dhikr Illahi Remembrance of Allah Dua Prayer Ghad-e-basar Downcast eyes (due to modesty) Hayaa Bashfulness, modesty Imam Leader Iqamat Second call to prayer said immediately before start of prayer Jami’a College for training of missionaries Jumu’ah Congregational Friday Prayer service Ma’moon Follower Majlis-e-Shura Consultative body of Jama’at Mehndi Henna; a henna party (a pre-wedding gathering for bride’s family and friends) Murrabi-Silsilah Missionary Nawafil Voluntary prayers Nizam-e-Jama’at Central administration of Jama’at Purdah Observance of veil, modesty Qa’idah Arabic primer Ronaq Party, celebration Sadaqat Alms Salat Compulsory prayer Shirk Any association of partners with Allah Almighty v Paradise Under Your Feet Surah Chapter of the Holy Qur’an Tabligh Propagation of religion Tahajjud Voluntary prayers performed in latter part of night Tarbiyat Moral training Tayyamum Dry ablution when water is not available Walima Celebration