MIAMI UNIVERSITY The Graduate School Certificate for Approving the Dissertation We hereby approve the Dissertation of Siri R. Hoogen Candidate for the Degree: Doctor of Philosophy _____________________________ Co-Director Ann Fuehrer, Ph.D. _____________________________ Co-Director Larry M. Leitner, Ph.D. _____________________________ Reader Vaishali Raval, Ph.D. _____________________________ Graduate School Representative Heidi McKee, Ph.D. ABSTRACT CONTEXTS OF CHOICE: PERSONAL CONSTRUCTS OF MOTHERHOOD IN WOMEN’S ABORTION DECISIONS by Siri R. Hoogen Though women who have already had children make up over 60% of all women seeking abortions, common public discourse perpetuates the myth that women seeking abortions do not understand what it means to be a mother, do not know what it means to be pregnant, or are making irresponsible parenting decisions. The stories of mothers who are raising children and decide to terminate a subsequent pregnancy contain enormous potential to disrupt these discourses about motherhood and abortion. Here, tenets of feminist constructivist psychology and methods of creative ethnography including photo elicitation are combined to explore the complex personal, social, and political dimensions of mothers’ decisions to abort unwanted pregnancies. Five women were interviewed and performative narratives were constructed and reflexively and collaboratively analyzed to illustrate each woman’s process of building her personal construct of motherhood and how, or if, her construct of motherhood played a role in her decision to terminate an unwanted pregnancy. The stories indicate that women’s personal constructs of motherhood contain elements of individuality, commonality, and transition. In addition, each woman’s construct of good motherhood was central to her process of deciding what to do with an unwanted pregnancy: In short, each woman found that being a good mother meant, at least one time in her life, not continuing a pregnancy. Concluding thoughts demonstrate how narratives that complicate or disrupt social discourse can be directed toward the purposes of reproductive rights activism, explore the utility of photo elicitation as a narrative research method, and suggest future directions for research on the intersection of women’s personal constructs and the dictates of dominant social discourse. CONTEXTS OF CHOICE: PERSONAL CONSTRUCTS OF MOTHERHOOD IN WOMEN’S ABORTION DECISIONS A Dissertation Submitted to the faculty of Miami University in partial fulfillment of the requirements for the degree of Doctor of Philosophy Department of Psychology by Siri R. Hoogen Miami University Oxford, Ohio 2010 Dissertation Directors: Ann Fuehrer, Ph.D. and Larry M. Leitner, Ph.D. © Siri R. Hoogen 2010 TABLE OF CONTENTS Prologue……………………………………………………………………………...... 1 Mother Variations……………………………………………………………... 1 Introduction…………...............……………………………………………………….. 6 A Feminist Account of Abortion Literature…………………………...…...….. 9 Research and Discourse on Abortion……………………………………..…... 12 Feminist Criticism of Abortion Advocacy…………………………………...… 16 Related Discourses: Adoption and Infertility…………………………...……... 18 Orienting Theory: Feminist Constructivism…………………………………... 20 Feminist Constructivism and the Personal within the Social………………..... 25 Mothers Choosing Abortion: A Feminist Constructivist Study……………....... 28 Multimodal Research and Activism…………………………………………… 29 Method……………………………………………………………………..………...... 33 Orienting Theories and Ideals of Narrative Collection……………………….. 33 Ethical Concerns and Feminist Research Praxis……………………………... 38 Working Method: Generating Complicating Narratives……………………… 44 Analysis of Text and Presentation of Narratives……………………………… 50 Results………………………………………………..……………………………….. 52 Lilith’s Story…………………………………………………………………… 52 Of Chaos and Connection……………………………………………………... 64 Motherhood Construct and the Abortion Decision…………………………..... 68 Jane’s Story…………………………………………………………………..... 71 Of Perception, Pride, and Company…………………………………………... 77 Motherhood Construct and the Abortion Decision……………………………. 82 Ingrid’s Story………………………………………………………………….. 86 In Defiance of Limits…………………………………………………………... 95 Motherhood Construct and the Abortion Decision……………………………. 103 Maya’s Story…………………………………………………………………... 107 In Search of Family……………………………………………………………. 115 Motherhood Construct and the Abortion Decision……………………………. 122 Liz’s Story……………………………………………………………………... 125 Doing, Having, or Not………………………………………………………… 133 Motherhood Construct and the Abortion Decision…………………………… 140 Discussion…………………………………………………………………………….. 146 Feminist Constructivism and Narratives of Motherhood……………………... 146 Utility of Photo Elicitation as Method………………………………………… 156 Constructs of Motherhood and Potential Reproductive Policy……………….. 158 Limitations of This Project…………………………………………………….. 163 Future Directions……………………………………………………………… 165 References……………………………………………………………………………... 171 Appendix A……………………………………………………………………………. 181 Appendix B……………………………………………………………………………. 182 Appendix C……………………………………………………………………………. 185 Appendix D……………………………………………………………………………. 186 Appendix E……………………………………………………………………………. 187 Appendix F……………………………………………………………………………. 189 iii ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS Not knowing how to begin, I will begin at the beginning. Thanks to Max and to Rebecca, without whose births this project would never have been conceived. Their entrance into the world made me a mother and brought about the most radical shift in my world view: Now more than ever I am vulnerable, I am open, to life’s amazing potential for love, loss, pain, and joy. It is the most excruciatingly beautiful, terrifyingly wonderful gift I have ever received. Thanks to Lilith, Jane, Ingrid, Maya, and Liz, who laid bare the most intimate details of their lives and who let me take their stories into the world without shame or misgiving. Without their courage and generosity this work would not have been possible. Thanks to Sue and Cliff who shared some of their own story and helped me see the margins of devastation in parenthood. Thanks, too, to Julie, Rachel, Brendon, and Emily for their insight and effort in their work with the transcripts. Thanks to the staff of Planned Parenthood, who reviewed my proposal, hosted me in their workplace, answered my endless questions, and screened countless potential participants for this project. They did this out of their tireless dedication to the health and wellbeing of women and from their conviction that this project was worth their support. I am so grateful for their help on this project and also for their continuing efforts on behalf of women and their families. Many friends and family were supportive during the time I struggled over this task. I want to thank my advisors Ann Fuehrer and Larry Leitner for their direction, inspiration, and encouragement, which were instrumental in helping me form my identity as a feminist constructivist psychologist. Thanks, too, to my mother Marilyn Sizer for reading drafts and making gentle suggestions about the readability of my language, and to my father Dan Hoogen for his curiosity and interest in the narratives of mothers. I thank Bonnie for her company in the library and her unstinting support and cheer and Michelle for her unwavering faith in my ability to get this done. Finally, my thanks would be woefully incomplete without mention of my spouse Ethan Sperry, who has been my most constant champion, my most unwavering support, my cheer, my goad, my occasional enabler and sometimes nag. To Ethan, and to our children Max and Becca, I dedicate this work. iv Prologue Mother Variations A few summers ago, I walked with two gay male friends up a busy avenue in Manhattan, happily debating politics and social policies—agreeing, mostly, or arguing finer points in the satisfying manner of preaching to the choir. At some point, the topic turned to abortion. “I don’t know,” opined one. “If those girls would just watch those outfits they wear, abortion wouldn’t even be a problem.” “As if gay men are never slutty?” cried the other, clearly taken aback. I was silent and astonished. Why did I expect these men, who were otherwise liberally inclined, to be pro-choice? Their framing of the abortion debate as a problem and outcome of sexual promiscuity surprised me. I walked on with them, sweltering and mired in my own thoughts. I felt betrayed. Some time later I spoke to another man at a fundraiser for Planned Parenthood. He, at least, was unabashedly pro-choice: “After all,” he said, rolling his eyes, “it’s just a piece of tissue!” I had mixed feelings about his support. His comment echoed what I had believed for a very long time, during the period when I carried my pro-choice beliefs easily and thoughtlessly. Things changed, though, when I became pregnant myself. It was a wanted pregnancy, a struggled-for pregnancy. As many of my thirty- something friends had noted, it seemed unfair that after worrying so long about getting pregnant accidentally we found it so difficult to become pregnant when we wanted to. So when I at last had a positive pregnancy test I was ecstatic; when the bleeding started at seven weeks, I was crushed. I rushed to the hospital, I had blood tests done and an ultrasound performed. My spouse was out of the country at the time, so I wrote to him about it: I saw the screen when they did the ultrasound. I was worried, but then I saw the black pool of an amniotic sac amid fuzzy grey tissue. In that deep black pool was a small bright ring, like a glowing Cheerio. The technician said the ring was