University of Vermont ScholarWorks @ UVM Graduate College Dissertations and Theses Dissertations and Theses 2018 Becoming By Believing: One Fraternity And Sorority Life Professional’s Journey In Finding Her Voice Kimberlee Monteaux De Freitas University of Vermont Follow this and additional works at: https://scholarworks.uvm.edu/graddis Part of the Higher Education Commons, and the Higher Education Administration Commons Recommended Citation Monteaux De Freitas, Kimberlee, "Becoming By Believing: One Fraternity And Sorority Life Professional’s Journey In Finding Her Voice" (2018). Graduate College Dissertations and Theses. 901. https://scholarworks.uvm.edu/graddis/901 This Dissertation is brought to you for free and open access by the Dissertations and Theses at ScholarWorks @ UVM. It has been accepted for inclusion in Graduate College Dissertations and Theses by an authorized administrator of ScholarWorks @ UVM. For more information, please contact [email protected]. BECOMING BY BELIEVING: ONE FRATERNITY AND SORORITY LIFE PROFESSIONAL’S JOURNEY IN FINDING HER VOICE A Dissertation Presented by Kimberlee R. Monteaux De Freitas to The Faculty of the Graduate College of The University of Vermont In Partial Fulfillment of the Requirements For the Degree of Doctor of Education Specializing in Educational Leadership and Policy Studies May, 2018 Defense Date: March 22, 2018 Dissertation Examination Committee: Robert Nash, Ed.D., Advisor Wolfgang Mieder, Ph.D., Chairperson Jason Garvey, Ph.D. Deborah Hunter, Ph.D. Cynthia J. Forehand, Ph.D., Dean of the Graduate College ABSTRACT While fraternity and sorority life continues to make headlines and is called upon regularly to validate the purpose it holds to remain on college campuses today, many still believe that when fraternity and sorority are done right, it is one of the best opportunities on college campuses today outside of the classroom. Much of their success is due to the efforts and support of the fraternity and sorority life professionals. This dissertation will offer the first Scholarly Personal Narrative of a mid-level, seasoned, fraternity and sorority life professional working in higher education. Current research shows the average age of a fraternity and sorority life professional is twenty- seven and over half the professionals have been at their place of employment for two years or less. I will explore my own personal journey over the last twelve years with hopes of finding meaning in this uncommon career path and explore where resilience and passion resulted in professional longevity. DEDICATION This dissertation is dedication to those in small towns, with big dreams. And, to Eloise. ii ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS You will dream and make it. What you become you’ve dreamt of before. Don’t fall behind if they don’t believe. For I believe and I am you. -Kim Monteaux, 1993 With a full heart and awareness, I’d like to thank those who helped me along the way and helped me believe in the possibilities. To my colleagues, near and far that answered my emails, texts, and phone calls. Or looked up from their desks when I needed a moment to talk, cry or just be seen. To my committee, Dr. Wolfgang Mieder, for nudging me along the way and for sharing his stories and memories about his fraternity experience. Dr. Deborah Hunter, for encouraging me to apply to the doctoral program so many years ago. Dr. Jason Garvey, for providing me friendship, support and inspiration. Dr. Robert Nash, for believing in me when I wanted to give up, for giving affirmation and a way to have my voice heard. To my cohort and faculty members, for cheering me on and encouraging me to remember why I started. Specifically, Dr. Khristian Kemp-DeLisser, Dr. Jeff Bukowski, Dr. Talia Glesner Covert and Dr. Judith Aiken. To my family, specifically my mom for her courageous choices, the beauty of my existence and role modeling unconditional love. To my grads and V, without each one of you, I would not be the professional I am today. The most significant honor is to be called a mentor, thank you. To Kaye, for showing me what mentorship looks like and should feel like. To my Phi Sigma Sigma sisters, “Your Sphinxhead proud and true…” Lastly, to my partner, Xavier for believing with me. I love you. iii TABLE OF CONTENTS DEDICATION .................................................................................................................... ii ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS ............................................................................................... iii PREFACE ............................................................................................................................1 INTRODUCTION ...............................................................................................................2 CHAPTER ONE ..................................................................................................................4 Fraternal Values Movement .............................................................................................8 Healing through Feelings ...............................................................................................10 Looking back .................................................................................................................14 Looking Ahead ..............................................................................................................19 Literature that Matters ........................................................................................................21 Research and Understanding ........................................................................................24 CHAPTER TWO ...............................................................................................................27 Finding SPN, Finding Myself .......................................................................................27 SPN Methodology .........................................................................................................31 SPN and Fraternity and Sorority Life ............................................................................36 Pre-Search: How do I get Started ..................................................................................38 Me-Search: What is my Personal Narrative Regarding the Ideas Emphasized In my Writing .........................................................................................................38 Re-Search: What Scholars and Researchers have informed my Writing? ....................39 We-Search: What are the Implications for my Profession, or Field of Study, that can be Generalized from my Scholarly Personal Narrative ............................39 CHAPTER THREE ...........................................................................................................42 Bonds Broken.................................................................................................................43 Unwanted Experiences ...................................................................................................47 Continues .......................................................................................................................51 Finding North .....................................................................................................................54 Those Who Don’t Know ...............................................................................................56 CHAPTER FOUR ..............................................................................................................61 Where Believing Began .................................................................................................62 Where the Pines Touch the Sky ....................................................................................65 Connecting The Stories ................................................................................................69 Social Class and Fraternity & Sorority Life .................................................................72 Going Grey .........................................................................................................................74 Managing Up or Just Being in the Room? ....................................................................76 CHAPTER FIVE ...............................................................................................................81 iv Finding My Exit ............................................................................................................88 University One ..............................................................................................................88 University Two ..............................................................................................................91 University Three ............................................................................................................94 Similarities of Experiences ............................................................................................96 …And Because I Believe in Myself, We Left ...................................................................98 CHAPTER SIX ................................................................................................................101 BIBLIOGRAPHY ............................................................................................................106 v PREFACE Who I am and where I am coming from is important. The context of my story and my personal view helps not only me to share